#224- The Goldfish Effect: Why Your Environment Is Shaping You More Than You Think

You have cracked a code. You are aligned, you are motivated, you are feeling like yourself. And then you walk into a room and something shifts. Salisha is mulling over one of the most important questions she has ever asked out loud: how do you protect that energy and bring it into every space you enter?

In this episode, you'll hear about:

• What it means to crack a code in your life and why protecting that momentum is everything
• The Broadway Backstage vs. Arkansas family visit comparison that perfectly explains energy environments
• Why New York City gave Salisha the freedom to finally become who she always was
• The goldfish analogy that will change how you think about the environments you allow yourself to be in
• Why being a whole vibe is not just a flex but a responsibility
• What pageants taught Salisha about showing up as the best version of yourself
• Main character energy: what it is, why it matters, and how to stop letting spaces influence you instead of the other way around

You are not here to play a supporting role in your own life. You are the main character. 

CHAPTERS

• [00:21] Nine months pregnant and out of clothes but still showing up
• [00:41] Have you ever cracked a code in your life?
• [01:44] When your good energy meets a completely different environment
• [02:52] Broadway backstage energy vs. visiting family down south
• [03:44] Why NYC gave Salisha the freedom to be herself
• [05:30] How to protect your momentum when you enter a different space
• [07:04] If you are a whole vibe it is your duty to fill the room with it
• [08:12] Reading the room and letting the brightest vibe win
• [09:00] The goldfish analogy and what it says about your environment
• [09:54] Be intentional about the spaces you allow yourself to be in
• [10:55] What pageants taught Salisha about staying competition ready
• [12:09] What would your 8 year old self say about where you are today
• [12:45] Main character energy and stepping into your power unapologetically

@salishathomas @thesalishashow, www.thesalishashow.com

Many thanks to Gotham Network in NYC, TyNia Brandon for writing and laying vocals down for the updated theme song and Big Red Studios for the intro video wherever you watch the latest season of The Salisha Show!

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:21

Hi, what's up? It's me, Salish. Welcome back to the Salisha show. Woo woo woo-woo. What is that my belly? Yes, it is. This is my big old belly. This is my husband's shirt. This is where we're at right now. So I just gotta go with the punches. I'm out of clothes, you guys. But I had an idea and I wanted to say it out loud and just kind of like mull it over and see what you think. So, have you ever cracked a code in your life and all of the pieces just fell together and things just clicked and you just got it? And the feeling that it gave you was a feeling of expansion, a feeling of alignment, a feeling of empowerment, a feeling of just like feeling really good about where you are in life, the things that you're doing, like you feel really motivated. Have you ever felt that? Like, no matter where you're where you are right now, maybe you're having a bad day right now, maybe you're right here right now, like having a great day. Like, I can't wait to take the day by storm or the world by storm or this year by storm, wherever you are. Like, have you experienced this? Even if like I have friends who like live in this space, and I also have friends and family who this is like a very foreign thing, but they have experienced it. I was thinking about the idea of when you are in a good place, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, and you go somewhere exposing yourself to people or a person who have the opposite energy. What happens in your experience? Like I'm asking you, obviously, you I can't hear you right now, but maybe you can come on the speakpipe on my website and tell me what happens, and maybe it's something different each time. I was thinking about this of how, like, if I'm backstage at a Broadway show, which it's been a little while, clearly. I'm nine months pregnant, there's a different way of thinking. I'm like, we're like counting our abs, who's the fittest? Um, what are we eating? There's like not a lot of fried food, unless if I'm the one bringing it in. But like there's just like a certain way of like approaching the physical body, because we gotta go on stage and like do the thing and sweat and be healthy and have the energy to like do a show eight times a week, six days a week. And then if I were to take a vacation and go visit family, say in Arkansas when I'm down south, it is a completely opposite energy, although it's still positive. So maybe this um this example might not be exactly what I'm going for. But follow, stay with me for a second. If I were to visit my family in the south, the pace is different, people talk slower, people are moving slower, and people are eating very, very differently. How can we take the energy of the place of where we're so empowered and go somewhere with the opposite energy and bring that with us? Another example would be oh, and I'm whispering now, I don't want to get in trouble. When I'm in New York, I feel so free. Why do I feel free in New York? Because everybody in New York is from somewhere else. And so that means when you move here, you have the opportunity to become who you have always been, but maybe you were hiding it because of fear of judgment or what your family thought or whatever. So when I first got here, I was like, this is my opportunity to see who I really am, because nobody knows who I was. And that is a very exciting, empowering place to be in. It's like a fresh, brand new start. Now, with that said, when I go home to where I grew up for 18 years, or if you count, college in the same state where I was for 21 years, people know me as something else. As they just expect who they got out of me, my entire upbringing. And if I act out of that character, they're a little shocked. For better or for worse. And for my poor dear mom, who is so worried about being judged by her friends, she's usually mortified by the new discoveries that I've made or the new discoveries that she is making about me. And so I worry about that. I'm like, I don't want to embarrass my mom, um, but I also want to be who I am. So I guess what I'm like mulling over today is when you have cracked a code for your life, how can you keep that momentum and bring it into a different space and not allow the space to dampen that good energy that you've got flowing, but instead affect the space with the new energy that you are coming at it with. Like if you are a vibe, oh my gosh, if you are a whole vibe, it's almost like your duty to walk into a room and continue to be that vibe. You are actually doing the world a disservice by being a whole vibe and walking into a room and letting a different vibe overtake your vibe. Like we are here to contribute on this planet and who you are, who you uniquely are, the color of your aura, the aura that travels with you. It's important that we stand so firm in it that when we enter a room, we can feel it. I'm speaking as if we're just assuming it's a positive vibe. I guess that's up for uh debate. Um, but if you've got a vibe that other people can benefit from, it is very important that you stand firm in that and that you fill the room with the vibe that you've got instead of crushing it. Does that make sense? Like it's like a superpower being an atmosphere changer. If you've got something other people want, share it. I will say the opposite is true as well. Like, if I'm in a really bad mood, I know it's contagious. I will literally go and hide. I will hide so that it doesn't spread like wildfire. But if I am like feeling like sunshine, that is a really good time to like not hide. So, what about reading a room? Well, if something huge or devastating has happened, I think that it's important to honor that and see it and respect it. But if we're just talking day to day, you're walking into a coffee shop, you're going grocery shop and you're hanging out with friends. Let the brightest vibe win. I like to compare this to this is probably a stretch. A goldfish. If you put a goldfish in a bowl, the goldfish will be small enough to stay in the bowl. If you put a goldfish in a tank, it will be a little bit bigger. If you drop a goldfish in a pond, it can grow. Like goldfish can be like a few feet long. So what does that mean? It means you adapt to the environment that you're in without even thinking about it. So either we have to like be really choosy with what environments are we allowing ourselves to be in, or we have to just be very intentional. We have to be very intentional about when we go into spaces that maybe we don't belong in, making sure we stay true to who we are. That's what I'm trying to say. I've been watching a bunch of pageants lately, and it's so fun. It's literally my favorite sport to watch. I love watching a pageant. I know there's so many opinions out there about it, but when I was like eligible to compete, it was so easy for me to like not gain a freshman 15 in college. It was so easy for me to like stay up to date on current events. It was so easy to like like stay in the know of what's happening in the world, in politics, in all the in current events, because I was preparing for a pageant. Also, like the pageants that I ran in, I made so many friends and I got, I won scholarship money, and I just had a really positive experience or positive experiences. And then, like at a certain point in the Miss America organization, I aged out. And when that happened, it was like, okay, well, pageants now can't be my motivation for like staying in shape or like being up to date on current events because I can't run anymore. So then, like, I have to find a new motivation. But it's why I love pageants so much. It's like it inspires me to be competition ready, which usually means me showing up in the world as the best version of myself. So even though that's pageants for me, what is that for you? What is that thing that you love or that you have like been striving for that when you go for it or when you attain it, it really makes you like pop. It really makes you feel the most put together, the most aligned. Like, what is that? I think it's like such a magic, such like a magic secret weapon wand, whatever, to like discover what that is and keep it in your back pocket. And if it changes over time, that's okay. But to just like keep tabs on what that is so that you always have something to keep you like inspired to keep growing, to be better, to like make your younger self proud. Do you know what I mean? Like, what would your eight-year-old self say about where you are today? Would he or she be like excited for you? Would he or she be proud of you? Like, what would they say? I don't know, just something to think about. I really want to tie this back into main character energy. It's the idea of when you show up places, you're the main character. Like, like not playing a supporting role in your own life. And I do talk about this in my book, Why Be a Nine when you can be a 10? Like fostering main character energy and being the one to influence a space instead of letting a space influence you, and really just stepping into your power unapologetically and showing up, being who you are. That is just like to me, to me, that's the goal. You walk differently, you talk differently, you carry yourself differently, you pit yourself differently, you believe you deserve different things when you are the main character of your life. When you decide that you deserve the things that you want. If you have an unspoken belief that you don't deserve it, you keep it away from yourself subconsciously. So I think like it's important to tap into your own version of your own main character energy so that you can attract what you want, the people that you want, and stay as high vibe as possible. That's all I got today. Thank you for hanging out and tuning in. And I'm gonna go put this belly away. And I'll see you next week.