Slut in Training

Romance Novelist Reveals How Steamy Love Scenes Are Really Written

Missy Greenberg

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How do romance novelists actually write steamy love scenes that feel sexy, believable, and impossible to put down? In this episode of Slut in Training, Missy, Tania & Jordan sit down with a romance novelist to talk about what really goes into writing chemistry, attraction, tension, and unforgettable love scenes on the page.

We get into what inspires her, how writers create emotional and physical tension that actually lands, and why the best romance scenes are about so much more than just spice. From romance novels to the art of writing desire, intimacy, and fantasy, this conversation is funny, smart, and full of insight for readers, writers, and anyone obsessed with a good love story.

We also talk about:

  • What inspires steamy romance scenes
  • Why readers are so drawn to romance and fantasy
  • What makes a love scene feel believable and hot

If you love romance novels, spicy books, writing, BookTok, love scenes, and behind-the-scenes conversations with authors, this episode is for you.

Topics include:
romance novelist, spicy books, romance novels, steamy love scenes, writing romance, chemistry in fiction, BookTok books, romance author interview, and what inspires writers.

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Hosted by: Missy Greenberg, Jordan Carlson & Tania Ross
Produced by: Missy Greenberg
Edited by: Charles E. Becker

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SPEAKER_02

Welcome to Slutton Training, hosted by Missy Greenberg. Jordan Carlton. Tanya Ross.

SPEAKER_00

Not watching the podcast. Yeah, they're just watching it.

SPEAKER_03

They're gonna have nicknames for us. You'll be breasty. I'll make it breasty again. There are worse ones. K-Breast. K-Brust. Hello, hello. Welcome, my gorgeous sluts out there. We'd like to start off our podcast with the word of the day. And today, the word of the day is fire dragon. Can you please define fire dragon, my ladies? Oh Jordan.

SPEAKER_02

Oh I'm gonna start with butthole. Does it start with nothing to do with butthole?

SPEAKER_00

Does it is it like uh is it like a penis that is shooting fire out of it? Very close. Is it like shooting strange-looking things out of it?

SPEAKER_02

It's not shooting its normal liquid out of it.

SPEAKER_03

You were getting warmer, but now you're cold again.

SPEAKER_02

But it's a dick that is ejaculating butthole spicy stuff.

SPEAKER_00

It could be spicy. Spicy semen? I oh my god. And warm and hot. Oh Jesus. Okay, no.

SPEAKER_02

Okay. I'm terrible at this. Um, okay, so we've got something out of the penis.

SPEAKER_00

It's penis. Something is coming out of the penis that is into a warm cave.

SPEAKER_02

Cave. Warm.

SPEAKER_00

I guess you could call it that. It's not red, is it? We shouldn't be concerned. Nope. No. Okay. Well, is it like when a guy eats something really spicy and then his nope, no? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Okay. Nothing with food. Right.

SPEAKER_02

Alright, we've got 30 seconds to wrap up. You were closer with fire, but fire out of the penis? It's a new trick.

SPEAKER_03

Is it like uh it causes fire, I guess you could say?

SPEAKER_02

It causes a fire? Puts out a fire with the semen.

SPEAKER_00

It's I know, okay. I got it, I got it. Okay. It's a penis that is dressed up like a firefighter so that it can then take that's Tanya's dream. Take it and then it can set out like the fire.

SPEAKER_03

I think Tanya just made this shit up.

SPEAKER_02

Did you find this in the urban dictionary?

SPEAKER_03

This comes from a reliable source called the Urban Dictionary. Yeah. Okay. It's reliable. Yeah. Um, I wish you were right, Jordan, but you're not. Uh it is the act of pouring butane over a boner, then making someone suck Yes. Isn't it butane? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Then making someone suck it. What? Then when the load ejaculates, or when it when the boner ejaculates a load, it comes out through the sucker's nose.

SPEAKER_02

What? Lovely. I've never heard of that.

SPEAKER_03

What? I can't wait to try. Wait, what is that called again?

SPEAKER_02

It's called a fire dragon. Fire dragon. Who's the moron that would try this and label this?

SPEAKER_03

I don't know. Like, why would anyone want to come out of your nose? I'm like, wouldn't you choke? Oh, okay. Because you've got your mouth full and then you've got your nose full. It's like chemicals.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, maybe we should just uh start the show.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Yeah. On that dragon note. Fiery. So on the it, you know, it's on it's a introduction. Yeah. So keeping the dragon stuff out of mind, our guest today is the wonderful Libby Waterford. She is the author of the Never a Bride and Sawyer's Cove The Reboot series, among others. She is a steamy contemporary romance series writer. Welcome, Libby.

SPEAKER_01

Welcome, Libby. Welcome, Libby. So happy to have you. Thanks for having me. I'm so excited to be here with you guys.

SPEAKER_00

We're very excited to talk about your romance novelist. I know. We all have fantasies. Did you write in the order that you thought the characters would be hottest to write?

SPEAKER_01

You know, I think I might have done that unconsciously because my first hero is named Jay. Ah. And she played a character who I kind of modeled on Pacey from Dawson's Creek, who was always my favorite. I can see that. Um, so I kind of modeled him on Joshua Jackson a little bit. And so yeah, maybe I did that unconsciously. I wanted to spend a little more time with him. Him on the page for a short.

SPEAKER_00

A couple more slutty moments with me.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. That's funny. Um, oh well, I think obviously I know what this answer is, but who's your audience? And not necessarily just women, but like the demographic amongst women that you kind of uh write to.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I write steamy contemporary romance, which is a pretty big genre, so it has a wide readership, but I would say it is mostly women and probably like 25 to like 65, probably is the age reign. I think it's like a little bit older. Um, for my other pen name, and I write Small Town Gay Romance. I think that's more like a maybe like a 50-50 split between male and female readers.

SPEAKER_02

Why do you think women especially love love stories and romance stories?

SPEAKER_04

Hmm.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, I'm a fan.

SPEAKER_01

I think everybody likes a good love story. I have two boys and we've been watching rom-coms for the first time recently with them, and they love them. They're so into them because they're funny and they're uplifting.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

And you know, they aren't scary and they are kind of more true to life, usually, depending. I mean, I write a more real in more realistic genre. So um, you know, everybody wants to find not necessarily a relationship, but like people that they can connect with and who understand them and who appreciate them and who you know make them feel like a part of a community or a family. And I I think that's a big part of romance for readers as well.

SPEAKER_03

Well, so is sex. So can we talk about that for a little bit? Sure. Have you ever written a sex scene that was so steamy you had to take a break just to cool down?

SPEAKER_01

Oh is that a yes? I think so. Yeah, I'd like scene.

SPEAKER_03

Did you write?

SPEAKER_01

I so I actually love writing sex scenes in my stories. Um author friends of mine, like that's their least favorite part of writing the book, but I love it. Um, I think it's one of the perks of being a romance author. Although there's lots of romance authors who write uh sweet books, so-called sweet books, that are don't have on the page sex in them, but I think that's one of the fun parts of my job.

SPEAKER_03

Um is there a particular one you wrote that was very steamy where you had to favorite scene that you've written?

SPEAKER_01

Wow, that's a really tough question. Yeah, favorite. I'm thinking back. One that stands out to me is in the first book in the Sawyers Cove series, which is called Take Two, and that's with Jay again. My uh like my favorite equivalent. And he and Cammy are they were like in love when they were kids, and then they broke up and they haven't seen each other in 12 years, but the feelings are still there, so it's a second chance love story, and they have sex in his shower, which is like a like a walk, like a walk-in, um, like cedar-lined shower with a bench, and it's like very luxurious, and that that sounds great. That's just that part of it. But um, you know, then he's uh they're like making out, and it's all a little bit emotional because they don't know if they have a future together, but um, she's not going to let that stop her from really enjoying the moment with him. And so I think how that one ends is she's jerking him off and then he comes on her breasts in the shower, which is also kind of convenient because the shower's right there for cleanups. That's very convenient. Sexy, yeah. Steve, that's one of my favorites.

SPEAKER_02

I love that. Is it a cool to put a sex scene in every chapter? Like, I'd be like, Yeah, why not?

SPEAKER_00

I'll throw in one here, one there, and boy, throw in another sex scene. Is there like a formula, like a like a you just include five different sex scenes of various kinds of sex? Like, what is do you you kind of have an idea of what that's gonna be?

SPEAKER_01

And then there's no formula. There is an expectation, I think, if you're writing a steamy novel, which that's my genre, is steamy that there will be a certain amount of sex on the page, but again, it doesn't I don't want it to be gratuitous, like just throwing in another sex scene because I don't have anything else to write about. I want it to actually contribute to the character's growth and change and to their relationship. So I have to sort of figure out what is going to further the story. So, like in the first book in the Sawyers Cove series, there is a scene where Jay, my main, my main hero and and Cammy, the girl he loves, um they have sex in the a hot tub in the hotel where his mom is the manager.

SPEAKER_02

It's in public hot, yes. That's even better.

SPEAKER_01

Funny, it's it's it's a character growth moment for them because they used to not high school, but like when they were filming the show and they were teenagers and um they haven't been together for 12 years. And so kind of going back to this sort of playful um hot tub makeout moment, but they're grown-ups now and they can, you know, they can sort of have it all now. Go all the way, yeah. All the basics that's funny. It was pretty steamy.

SPEAKER_02

Well, just keep talking about sex scenes for the rest of the podcast. Yeah, exactly. What else you got? Tell us more.

SPEAKER_01

That's more of an audio book. To read it. Exactly. You have to read it. Some Sawyers note. And I have a full-length novel series that I'm just finishing up that is a season series. So I have a summer book, a fall book, a winter book, and the spring book is coming out in May.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, for every seasonal sex. That's better.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

That's a good question. That's a slutty question. Is the sex in them like seasonal then? Like is it is it like you outside to enjoy the foliage?

SPEAKER_02

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. You guys are getting the hang of the snow. I like the theme. I like the theme sex. Yeah. Snow quarterly.

SPEAKER_01

Winter book would definitely uh huddle there under the covers trying to keep each other warm on a fur rug next to the fireplace.

SPEAKER_02

Under the Christmas tree. That would hurt. Let's be practical here. Is it hard to? I mean, I you're married, right? To your husband, yes. And you have two kids. I know that. Um, is it hard to go from like a hetero love scene to a you know, like a lesbian love scene or a gay love scene? How do you flip the switch in your brain?

SPEAKER_01

Because it's really not that different, honestly. Yeah, it's really not. Yeah. It to me, it comes from the same place in my brain. Yeah. Um, and it is not that different. The the only, yeah, it it's just a little bit more complicated with pronouns because you'll have like two he, he in a scene, yeah. Um, as opposed to he, she. And that is a little bit like more work on my on my end to make sure everything's clear and people know what's going on. But other than that, no, it's really actually not that different.

SPEAKER_02

The body parts, it's just a body part. We're familiar with all of them.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03

The emotions are the same. The love is the same.

SPEAKER_02

I mean, love is love. Yeah. Yes. Speaking of body parts, and I know writing is very hard, as I've mentioned before. It's hard, missing. I'm a failed novel writer. Well, stop it. Um, okay. How do you come up with all the synonyms for the different body parts? And we're gonna play a quick game once you answer this question.

SPEAKER_01

Okay. Well, I on my first draft, I just kind of blurt everything out and your shit draft. Yeah. See what happens. Yeah, exactly. And then when I'm revising, that's when I go in and say, Oh, I've used, you know, this word way too many times. So I'm going to have to come up with a more unique way of saying, you know.

SPEAKER_02

What is the most common word you use the most? Or what's the word you use the most when you're writing?

SPEAKER_01

Probably like fingers or touch, you know, like shaft. You know.

SPEAKER_02

I want to know shaft.

SPEAKER_00

I don't know.

SPEAKER_02

Just fingers and touch?

SPEAKER_00

Well, just yeah, I would say she doesn't want to give anything away.

SPEAKER_02

Testicles, perhaps. Two lips.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, messy mouth, lips, tongue, mouth, tongue.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, so now we have a quick, quick little game for you. Okay. Okay. I'm gonna say a word. You have to give me three synonyms for that word in three seconds. Are you ready for this? I'll try. One, two, three. There we go.

SPEAKER_01

Erection.

SPEAKER_02

There you go. Erection's pushing it, but I'm gonna let you have that one. Okay. Okay. Next word. Breath. One, two, three, go. Um I guess nips.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. I've heard of nip. Yeah, I guess, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. A tit is not the same as a nip.

SPEAKER_02

I think.

SPEAKER_00

No. But one is a part of the other. Well, Missy, you can't.

SPEAKER_02

Wait, no, we're not done here. We've got one more. One more, one more. One more. This one has to be faster though. Okay. Okay. The word is orgasm. One, two, three. Go. No. Um orgasm.

SPEAKER_01

Uh climax. Um crest. Crest? That's a good one. Barreling over the edge of ecstasy.

SPEAKER_02

That's a good one. I like that. That's a writer word. That is a writer. Yeah. All right. All right. You pass. Thank you. So good. I thought of something for your breasts, though.

SPEAKER_00

The girls. The girls. The girls. Tanya when you write flows in a sex scene. Yeah. When she writes her sex scene, I'll call it the girls. Yeah. Perfect. Two of them.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. Sometimes you don't need to. Maybe there's one.

SPEAKER_00

One girl? I don't know. You never inclusive.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Do you ever use like people in your real life to inspire your characters? You talked about Dawson's freak a little bit. So is that kind of it's just off limits?

SPEAKER_02

Think about those friends, relatives.

SPEAKER_01

I, you know, in a general way, I have. Um, my uh the hero of the first book in my Never a Bride series is a gardener. And um, I did use my brother as a model, actually. Oh, because he is a gardener. And so if I had any plant questions, I would text him and be like, please help me with this. Does this make sense? So this is the kind of plant he'd be doing work with in this garden. And um, so that was handy.

SPEAKER_02

Did you write a sex scene with the gardener? Oh, yeah. Is that weird to think of your brother?

SPEAKER_01

Well, I didn't uh I didn't model the character really on him, I just took inspiration from his job and like the location where he worked and stuff like that. So um, yeah, I didn't um, but it does make it hard to name character. I like I don't name characters after people in my immediate family, and that kind of precludes me from using some good names. So like I'm like, oh darn it, I can never use that name because I just can't write, I just can't write a book with a character who has the same name as as you know, yeah. Names are hard, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, yeah. Well, um, speaking of family, do you test out sex scenes with your partner? You're like, hey, I'm just thinking about this scene, I can't write it out. I'd like you to lay in bed. I'm gonna just jump on top of you and see if this works. So I can finish the book.

SPEAKER_01

Um I will say that I I have if I'm like writing a scene and I need to see if something is actually like going to work in like in this I'll use my husband as a live model. I'll be like, can is this possible? Can you know?

SPEAKER_02

And he doesn't mind he doesn't mind. He benefits from you being a romance novelist. You've got a great imagination. Well, very crazy.

SPEAKER_03

Do you write a steamy novel and then act upon it? Correct.

SPEAKER_02

Like a steamy scene.

SPEAKER_01

Do you take it into the bedroom? Yes, you're uh there have been times when I've been editing and I'm like, wow. And I forgot like what I wrote wrote. I'm like, oh wow, this is really steamy. And then I'm like, hmm, okay.

SPEAKER_02

And it just kind of, you know, ignites yeah, ignites the passion. Yeah, yeah. Fire dragon. Um does he suggest any ideas? Does he read your drafts or your final he does actually read my books?

SPEAKER_01

He um he was looking for something to sort of unwind the other day, and he's like, I think I'm gonna reread one of your books. And I was like, Okay, great, enjoy. It was really sweet. So he does read my books and he enjoys them. Um, he doesn't really give me input unless I need help with cars, because he's a car guy. So I'll say, like, who do you think that this character would drive this kind of car? And then he'll give me his opinion and way more information than I'm ever gonna actually use in the book about that car. But I appreciate it for sure.

SPEAKER_02

What about your boys? How old are they, and what do they think of you as the steamy romance novelist? They're 10 and 12.

SPEAKER_01

Old enough to read. So they know what I do, but they don't, they haven't read any of my books, and they probably won't for a very long time, if ever. But they know I write for grown-ups and they're fine with that. And they think it's cool that I'm a writer and that I have books with, you know, with my name on them, and he they think that's very cool.

SPEAKER_02

So for sure. That's cool.

SPEAKER_00

So, do you have uh books or authors that you recommend or that you particularly love to read? And okay, and then also, do you have any favorite cover art? Because that is definitely one of my favorite things. Oh my gosh. In that realm is to see all of the cover art.

SPEAKER_01

Do you come up with it? Yeah. Um, I have so many favorite authors. I love um, I like Emily Henry, I love Alexis Hall. Um, I love historical romance. That's what I like to read the most, even though I write contemporary. So I love like Julia Quinn and Eloisa James. Um they're some of my favorites.

SPEAKER_02

What about Colleen? Say that again. What about Colleen Hoover?

SPEAKER_01

I have read some Colleen Hoover. She's a little more angsty than I like to read. Um, but you know, I've I like a bunch of subgenres. I I liked Fourth Wing a lot. That's a romantic that's very popular right now.

SPEAKER_00

Reading in my book club right now. Yeah, really.

SPEAKER_02

In the middle, yeah, in the middle of romance. Like people having sex with dragons.

SPEAKER_01

Um but romance covers are a lot of fun. I I like the old kind of fashioned painted ones that have the Harlequin. You know, yeah. Yeah, like Harlequin or or sort of um like like the old um Avon ones that are very like bursting muscles and you know, those are a lot of fun. They're they're they're a relic of a different time, but but they're fun. Yeah. Mine are more strategic. Straightforward, usually, like uh a guy's face, a very handsome man's face or chest or something like that. It better be. Yeah.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Do you have input into it? Like, do you I'm just curious, do you go to your publisher or your editor and you're like, this is what this man looks like in my head? This is what this person in Sawyer's.

SPEAKER_01

I do. I work with a cover designer who kind of somehow magically knows what's in my head and like makes a cover that's even better than I dreamed of. But um, I do get to say, you know, this is the hero, and so I'm kind of looking for something like this. But sometimes if I get ahead of myself production-wise, I'll get the cover before I write the story, or like around the same time I'm starting the story, and that's actually awesome because then I have the exact guy in my head as I'm writing, and that's like kind of amazing, helpful.

SPEAKER_00

That's very cool.

SPEAKER_01

I was just on an airplane and I pulled up my book to start working on it, and I was like looking around and I was like, I don't know if I can work on this right now.

SPEAKER_02

That's how I feel about reading them. Like, if I'm reading a romance novel and I'm reading like a hot scene in public, I like- You feel dirty. Yes, I like have to look around and see if it's appropriate for anyone. That's what I'm talking about. We need to own our pleasures. So you read romance novels in public. It's okay. No, I think it's different. I mean, I I definitely own my pleasures, but when I'm trying to write, I think when I was trying to write like a steamy two-sentence love scene, I was like, what the fuck is wrong with you, Missy? Like, you can't even come up with a two-sentence love scene, even though in your head you've got many going on. It's it's much harder to write it than it is to, you know, think about and fantasize about it. It's true.

SPEAKER_01

It's it's it gets easier though, the more you try and the more you work on it. It it comes out easier, I think.

SPEAKER_02

That makes sense. That makes sense. Yeah, with anything. I think it's interesting. I mean, there are definitely parallels. So I think I was writing trying to write the novel and screenwriting at the same time. So very similar in process in some ways, okay. Of building up the story and trying to figure out what the characters want and stuff like that. But I think novel writing is a whole nother beast. It's really hard. And so I really read steaminess. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Well, yeah, the steaminess is like you can go, yeah, to the nth degree, and I could think of things to write that's only in my fantasies.

SPEAKER_00

She's gonna be.

SPEAKER_02

Just write it down. Only the steamy stuff. People would open it. One particular man sell it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah, go for it.

SPEAKER_02

Okay. Um, what kind of questions do you get from your fans? Um, anything crazy or any as far as like feedback or requests from them of like, hey, can you make this character like hotter or more sex scenes or I want to see him naked, you know, like stuff like that?

SPEAKER_01

Um, I definitely have had requests for books about characters that were just sort of secondary characters that I wasn't thinking would get their own book. And so it's always interesting to see what which characters readers respond to and who they want to see get get a whole story. Um, so that's kind of interesting, especially when you're writing in a series and you kind of have it planned out, and then you're like, wait a minute, oh no, I have to, am I gonna have to write a whole book about this one character? Yeah um I, you know, when I meet romance readers, they're always very like respectful and they love like love talking about the world of the stories. And um romance readers are awesome people. Yeah. When I meet non-romance readers and they find out I'm a romance author, they sometimes have unusual questions because they just don't get the genre and they think it's all about um sex. Yeah. I mean, they think it's it's not they think that they think it's like porn, which I don't think it is. It's um, it's certainly like sex is a really important part of a lot of romance novels, not every romance novel, but it's also about you know story and characters. It's not a it's not formulaic, it's it's it's very character driven, and um, so I have to kind of explain that to people who've never read a romance novel before.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah. Well, I loved this interview, and you were so insightful, and we can't wait to read your book on Sawyer's Cove. Um, but before we end our session, we like to ask our guests to use the word of the day, which is fire dragon, all right, with that definition, and use it in the context of your work. I've being a you're a writer. Writer.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, okay. So I could have a scene where we've got our hero, and he's asking the heroine to do a fire dragon, and she could be like, Hell no, I'm not doing that. That's correct answer. I just should.

SPEAKER_04

I guess that's great.

SPEAKER_01

That's funny. And he respects her for being strong about her boundaries and then love it, healthy boundaries and have steamy sex some other way than shower.

SPEAKER_04

Safe, safer, more fun for her.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Um, well, Ivy, thank you so much for coming on. Um, and we do ask her, yes, uh, what advice would you give your younger self about relationships?

SPEAKER_01

Ooh, about relationships. Oh, wow. Yeah, that is a great question. I would say to my younger self, don't rush because good good things will come when they're supposed to come. That's what I was saying.

SPEAKER_02

I love that. Yeah, yeah. I believe in that too.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. So, okay, then to wrap things up with the most important question, where can our sluts find you?

SPEAKER_01

If you want to check out my Sawyer's Cove and Never a Bride series, you can go to my website, which is LibbyWaterford.com. And there's a place on the main page where you can download the first book in each series for free. Oh you can get started with those. And then my L Waters new release is coming out in May. That's called A Small Town Spring, and that is available for pre-order everywhere. So um what's your Instagram? Libby Writes Romance. Okay. You can find me on Instagram there.

SPEAKER_00

Cool.

SPEAKER_01

So definitely check, check out uh the free books.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, the free books on this. Awesome. Well, thanks so much for having for for coming onto the podcast. Like everyone's been saying, it was amazing having you. And we're so yeah, we're so thankful. And thanks, Slutz, for listening. Follow and subscribe for more slutty moments. Sluts out. Slut. Slut.