1-Minute Win #64: Listen with Intention

Listening isn't passive. 

It's one of the most active things any leader can do.

Full attention can lead to a better connection.

#Leadership #Listening

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:17

Welcome to One Minute Wins with Dr. Dana Martin, the podcast where intentional growth meets practical leadership. One quote, one lesson, one action to help you lead yourself and others better. Let's jump in.

SPEAKER_01 0:36

Audi and welcome back to One Minute Wins. I am Dr. Dana Martin. And today, One Minute Wins number 64. Listen with intention. Today, I believe this is one of the most overlooked pieces of leadership within communication. And it's not speaking, it's listening. Our quote today comes from James Hume's. I think about listening, and this is why. Before leaders can communicate well, they must first understand well. Today we're talking about why listening is the first act of leadership and why it may be the fastest way to strengthen relationships, improve trust, and become a better leader. As I said, I am Dr. Dana Martin, a leadership coach, author, speaker, and someone who believes in communication and believes that communication can be better for everyone. So today, listening is the first act of leadership. Too many leaders believe that communication means talking. It doesn't. Communication begins with understanding. And understanding starts with listening, not formulating a response, not mentally preparing for your emotions based on what they're saying and not interrupting to provide your own story. Listening. And when people feel heard, they become more open, more trusting, engaged. Listening isn't passive. It's one of the most active things any leader can do. Early on in my leadership career, I thought I needed to have all the answers. Someone would bring me a problem, and before they even finish explaining it, I'm already trying to solve it. I thought I was helping. I mean, heck, I do this in my own home. And sometimes I was. But often I wasn't really hearing the issue. The real issue. I had a mentor once give me a real small piece of advice that was really, really big.

SPEAKER_02 3:20

Ask one more question. What? Ask one more question. That's all they told me.

SPEAKER_01 3:29

If you ask one more question, everything's gonna change. Well, guess what? I thought he was being ridiculous, and I asked one more question, and everything changed. Instead of rushing toward solution, I became curious. I listened a little bit longer and I discovered that the problem people described wasn't always the problem that they were actually experiencing. Listening uncovered the peeled back the layers of the onion. And each of those assumption layers, clarity ensued with every question that was asked. Here's what the research says. According to research published in the International Journal of Listening, employees who perceive their leaders as good listeners report significantly higher trust, stronger job satisfaction, and a greater organizational commitment. So they're successful and they're loyal and they're happy. Interesting. Additionally, that same study highlighted, a study highlighted in Harvard Business Review found managers trained in active listening were rated as substantially more effective by their direct results. People don't just want answers, they want to know that they've been heard. Listening builds that credibility and builds that sense of value before solutions ever will. And if we're being honest with ourselves, most conversations become opportunities to prepare our next response instead of fully understanding the other person. Intentional listening changes that habit. That's one of the biggest lessons that I've learned. And another one as coach is that people don't often need me. And quite frankly, no one needs me to solve any problems as their coach. I've watched people answer their own questions simply because someone finally listened to them, provided them the space without interruption, asked a follow-up question or two.

SPEAKER_02 6:31

And as a coach, so what I do, I ask.

SPEAKER_01 6:36

I listen, I reflect, and sometimes the breakthrough comes not because I said something brilliant. In fact, most of the time, breakthroughs come because someone had the space to feel understood. And that's the power of intentional listening. So, how do we do it? Well, here's four steps how leaders can become better listeners. First, remove all distractions. Put the phone away, close the laptop, give people your eyes. Number two, ask follow-up questions.

SPEAKER_02 7:21

What else?

SPEAKER_01 7:22

Tell me more. I feel like I might be missing something. Do I have everything? Those are very simple questions that invite deeper conversation. If I say, are we good? What does that do? Nothing. It just puts the leftover onion back in the refrigerator. Number three, resist solving the problem too quickly. Understanding always comes before advice. You can't provide a follow-up question or even a piece of advice to anyone if you don't fully understand the question or the issue. And lastly, four, summarize what you heard. Say, so what I'm hearing is see, that simple phrase does not create a gap in that you're not listening. It's providing you an opportunity to show that you understand so that they can confirm number four, step four in the commuter what framework, so they can confirm the messaging is correct and the understanding is correct. Listening, it's not about silence, it's about your presence. So here's the reflection question today. Who needs your full attention today? Not just half your attention, not while checking email or doom scrolling. Who needs your full attention? And maybe it's not a need, but who deserves that gift right now? Here's the action step. Give someone five uninterrupted minutes today. No notifications on your phone, no no interruptions, no multitasking, just intentional living.

SPEAKER_02 9:26

By intentionally listening.

SPEAKER_01 9:29

You might be surprised what you hear. The best leaders aren't always remembered because they gave the best speeches. They're remembered because they made people feel valued, and listening communicates respect. Respect will build trust, which will create influence. Before people care what you know, they need to know you care enough to listen to them. Thank you for listening today. You'll find more resources and material over at dmilm.com. Visit Amazon.com for the One Minute Win Volume 1 book and always remember the example.