Who Let Us Adult?

Special Delivery | Was I Dropped Off by FedEx!? (Jaz's Adoption Story)

• Ian & Jasmine Summers • Season 1 • Episode 2

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My sisters used to say I was "dropped off by FedEx," and honestly... I still laugh about it! In this episode, I'm sharing the real story behind the joke, my adoption story, and how it shaped my perspective on family, faith and identity in the best way. 

Growing up as a black girl adoption into a white family, Jaz opens up about navigating two worlds, finding her voice and how God has been faithful through it all. This honest, funny, and hope filled conversation reminds us that family isn't about where you come from, it's about the love that shapes who you become. 

Maybe your story looks different than mine, but the truth remains the same... we are all adopted into God's family and He has claimed you as His own. Fully loved, fully known. 

Topics: adoption, family, faith, identity, motherhood, race, growing up different, belonging, hope

Tune in for a mix of heart, humor, and hope. 

New episodes of Who Let Us Adult? drop every Sunday at noon!

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Speaker:

Welcome to episode two of Who Led US Adult. So I have a, a really great honor of being able to sit here and coate narrate, um, one of my favorite stories. Um, and that is the one of my lovely wife. Um, so for those of you who do not know, um, Jasmine was adopted, um, as a child, uh, by a wonderful family. Um, so I'll start off really this, this episode with really asking you this question. Honey, why do you want to tell your adoption story?

Speaker 2:

This is a lot of pressure. This is so much pressure. I if you know Ian and I, you know that Ian is very extroverted and you're gonna be like, Jasmine, you're extroverted too. And I am. But one of us in this relationship loves the center of attention. It's her, and it's not me. It is not at all. So, um, I like being behind the scenes on stuff. So whenever the attention all eyes are on me Yeah. On this, it definitely like, makes me uncomfortable to talk about. But yeah, I wanna share my story because it is a part of who I am and it means so much to me. It has shaped who I am as an adult and a mother, a wife, um, a friend. Mm-hmm. A daughter just. All of the things. A Christian. Yeah. Like my faith. I don't, I don't know that I am here without that, and I just have an incredible family that gave me that foundation. So I want to share that with people because there's many people that I've met over the years Yep. Who don't know. Yeah. That story. And maybe have never heard my story from the beginning. Yeah. So, so

Speaker:

let's start at the beginning. Yeah. Um, you were born in Cleveland, Ohio.

Speaker 2:

I was. Yay. Land. Come on. Believe land. Here we go. Dog pound, prow Browns. What? All right, let's go. What?

Speaker:

Anyway, I'm not, we'll

Speaker 2:

go. We're, we're a house divided. You'll learn about that.

Speaker:

Yes. But anyway, born in Cleveland.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker:

Tell us a little bit about that upbringing.

Speaker 2:

Well. If we're going all the way back to where I was born, when I was born, I was born in 92, um, in Cleveland, but I don't have a lot of recollection of mm-hmm. Obviously that early season in my life. So my family, my adoptive family, they got me in foster care when I was three months old.

Speaker 4:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

And that story of like from zero to three months, I've heard, you know, some stories about how that came to be. Um, one being that we were left, you know, me and my sisters, my biological sisters were left, you know, kind of alone and child services got involved. Yeah. And you know, then here I am a three month old baby placed with my family.

Speaker:

Wasn't your oldest sister essentially raising you for the Yeah, I believe so. Okay. I

Speaker 2:

believe so. Um, and that's another thing too, is like, it's kind of hard. I don't wanna like speak for them. Yeah. Because they were older and they, I would actually be very interested to have conversation. Conversation and like, really we have a little bit. Um, but it would be very interesting to sit down and have that conversation fully, especially now being in this season of life where, um, you know, just the maturity Yeah. And being able to like, wrap my head around the stuff that I don't remember Yeah. Of our, of my childhood. Um, but yeah. So,

Speaker:

so, um, Jeff and Gerald, uh, they foster you to start Yeah.

Speaker 2:

My parents were foster parents. Yeah. So they had fostered, you know, I don't, I don't know the exact number of children. That's a lot that they've fostered. They fostered a lot of children, beautiful souls. Just a heart for kids. Mm-hmm. Um, and just took them into their house. And if you know my parents, um, you know that they are just true servant leaders. Yeah. Like, they go above and beyond for. Anybody and everybody. Um, so yeah, they fostered prior to me, but I was their last, I stole their hearts completely. Um, not that the other foster kids did not because I had seen pictures of them and I just know like they're adorable. However, if you know anything about foster care and adoption, adoption is you're adopting Yeah. You are bringing that child into your home like they are your child. Yeah. Right off rip. Foster care, the goal is not adoption per se. The goal of foster care is reunification with the biological family. So while the biological parents are basically getting their life together mm-hmm. And, you know, healing. And getting into a position where they can care for their children. Their children are temporarily placed in foster care. Yeah. With foster families. Um, sometimes in those instances, the parents may give up their rights and say, you know, the foster family has permission to adopt. They might, you know, my child or my children or, um, the reunification does happen. Yeah. So that's kind of the difference between adoption and foster care. So I was in foster care initially and so for five years, so I was placed with them at three months and then for the next five years, I went back and forth. Was it like between them and Cleveland? My family in Cleveland? You know, gosh, I don't even know if it would be like a week or two weeks. I was gonna say, was it like every other week? I dunno. I don't know. I think if I remember correctly, and my mom will correct me on this, but I think it was like, I would be like a week with them. Yeah. And then like a couple. Back in Cleveland or something of that nature. But I could be wrong on that.

Speaker:

And I know there are rules when it comes to foster care. Yeah. So like, um, I believe, we'll fast forward a little bit. You're, you were what, four or five and

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker:

They went to Disney World or

Speaker 2:

I was, I think I was younger than that. Um, man, you brought this up. Yeah. This hurts my parents broke my heart. I still give them crap about this. But, um, yeah, when you're a foster child, you couldn't, at least back then, I don't know if the rules have changed now, but back then you couldn't take foster children out of the state of, out of the state that you're in. Yeah. So, out of Ohio, they weren't allowed to take me out of the state, and they went to Disney and I It was You went to Cleveland? I went to Cleveland. Gee, thanks. This is the happiest place on earth.

Speaker 5:

I went to Disney, I went to Cleveland.

Speaker 2:

Right, right. I love, I love my Cleveland Browns, but Dang. But Disney would've been fun. Yeah. Um, so I didn't get to go to Cleveland, or I didn't go to, I didn't get to go to Disney. Yeah. And yeah, I still give them crap about that because like

Speaker:

that's stuff that like scars you Yeah. As a team.

Speaker 2:

No, they, they're, I don't even remember what they say.

Speaker:

I feel like I owe you a Disney trip now.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, for sure. Yeah, for sure. But I'll appreciate it.

Speaker:

Noted.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. I'll appreciate it way more now.

Speaker:

So I remember, Jeff and Cheryl tell, or really Cheryl was telling me, uh, probably about a year ago that. At one point you, when they, you, you would go up to Cleveland, you would cry so much because you missed being, you know, with your parents now. And that ended up lead leading to, I believe what it was your grandmother who recommended or was your aunt that recommended that, or no, it was your mom that recommended that, or had asked Jeff and Cheryl if they wanted to. Yeah, my biological

Speaker 2:

mom was the one who was, I remember the way that my mom tells this story, she said, when she was talking with my biological mom, she was like. She really loves you guys. And my mom was like, yeah. And we really love her. Mm-hmm. And she could just see like, that I recognize them as my family'cause they were taking care of me during that season.

Speaker 6:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So when I hear that, and even when I look back at her making that decision to say, I give you permission to adopt my daughter.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Like, I didn't, I didn't have a relationship with her, but the amount of respect and like the strength that I know that, that took

Speaker:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

To be able to, I mean, we have children

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Now, and like, that makes me really emotional. Yeah. That, you know, you're willing to be like, wow, like this family is taking care of my daughter. Mm-hmm. You know, I'm gonna, I'm gonna give, give that to you. So, yeah, that's, it's powerful. You know,

Speaker:

I do have, I guess my, my, my follow up to this, now I know this, and we recently found this out about a year, year, year and a half ago, but, um, your parents also fostered your full sister as well at the same time. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, they did. And that's a, oh my gosh, that's a, a deep story. Yeah. Like, that's, that's a, I know, I didn't know if you were comfortable going there. Not yet. Just because that's a mm-hmm. And there are certain things that I think like are my story mm-hmm. To share. Yeah. And then there's other things that, you know, I don't know that I have, I don't know enough of like the details, the things that went around it. So I, I can't do it justice Yeah. And give it the proper care that I would want the person who went through it to be able to tell that side Yeah. Of the story. So. Okay.

Speaker:

We, we, like I said, we'll table that, um. So you're officially adopted by, um, you know, Jeff and Cheryl.

Speaker 3:

Yeah. You

Speaker:

moved down to, well, I guess, yeah. Oh yeah. You moved down to, um, their home. Mm-hmm. And lived there full time. Um, tell me a little bit about transitioning, growing up. What was that like? Because you went from, you know,

Speaker 2:

transitioning from

Speaker:

the, the, from the city to the, the hood.

Speaker 2:

We have to specify. Specify what you mean by transitioning. That's why in 2025, I'm just saying.

Speaker:

Fair, fair point. You're right. You transitioned from the hood to the sticks.

Speaker 2:

There we go. There we go. And we didn't talk about this. Yeah, we did talk about it, but, uh, the drum roll. Can you do it for me? Drum roll.

Speaker 5:

It's a really bad, I was adopted

Speaker 2:

by a white family. Oh yeah. I was adopted by a white family, so black girl. Adopted by a white family in small town, country town, Ohio, Amish Burg, Holmes County. Back in the sticks, like you said, the horse and buggies, you used to call BFE. I'm not gonna, we're not gonna sell you what that means. If you don't know what it means, I can't help you.

Speaker:

Urban Dictionary free.

Speaker 2:

Is it urban or, yeah, redneck. That is, it's an redneck, it's a slang term. Okay. B, FE. Yeah. All right. Um, yeah. So, country, town. Country. Yes. A lot of white people.

Speaker:

You were, uh, what percentage of black were black folks? Were you in your, uh, in your, oh, like in your school?

Speaker 2:

0, 0, 0 0 0 1%. Oh, recommend. Yeah, that's, yeah. And we were all friends.

Speaker:

You had to stick together, right?

Speaker 2:

We had to stick together for sure. It's so cool. Right, right. As soon as there was a black person that walked in, school was like. Like,

Speaker:

come join our clique. Right. Literally.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. You know who you are if you're watching this. That's really funny.

Speaker:

Um, okay, so, you know, you adopted by a white family Yeah. In the states. That transition

Speaker 2:

coming down from the city to Yes. Urban, not urban, but to country life. Yeah. So I mean that there was, there was no difference, like for me'cause I was so little. Yeah. Yeah. So that was my home, you know, from jump and, um, growing up, like, it was great. It was, I had a blast. We, they have land, you know, we were outside all the time. Had a great time. I have two sisters. Yeah. Um, within my adoptive family, so it was the five of us and our cousins. Like, it was just, we had a, a great time. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker:

That's, that's awesome. Now, now tell, let's talk about that. Okay. You mentioned, you mentioned sisters, so two, two adoptive sisters who we love. Yeah. Love them so much. Um. But three daughters in one house. Yeah. With one bathroom. Yeah. Let's talk about that. Gosh, that was awful.

Speaker 2:

Oh my gosh. That was terrible. And this is not related to being adopted at all. It is. Just having, uh, one bathroom with three daughters is literal nightmare. I really, especially as we be, became teenagers and started hitting puberty. Yeah. And that was this, this could be a whole side tangent. So I

Speaker:

pray for Jeff. I don't know how he, he managed that. He

Speaker 2:

Yeah. I mean, you've, he, you've talked to him about it before. He's definitely like, that was the channel We call those like the dark years. Yeah, for sure.'cause it got crazy in the house. But

Speaker:

talk about your relationship with your sisters.

Speaker 2:

So my sisters are biological daughters of my parents. Yeah. And then I'm the only adopted daughter and which makes me the

Speaker 3:

coolest.

Speaker 2:

Um, but. They, I have a great relationship with my sisters. Mm-hmm. My oldest sister, she is like this protector and just typical big si, oldest child energy. She's like, she's the smartest person every Yeah. Smartest person I know. Um, and I just, yeah. She's just like such a great protector. And then my middle sister is like her. Both of their hearts are amazing, but my middle sister, like, she's so sweet and she's so kind, like just the way that she talks to people. See you're Ian's smiling if you're listening to this. Ian's smiling like so big.'cause he knows, like my oldest sister, she's very like, she will grill you with questions like the way her brain works. Yeah. Like if I bring up something to her, I gotta be ready because I'll be so excited about something and I'm just like, ready for it. I'm ready to jump in. I didn't ask not one single question. And I'm like, yeah, I'm about to do X, y, Z. Right. And then my oldest sister will be like, okay, but what about. Alright, but what about blah, blah, blah, blah? Yeah. And what about da da? And she just starts asking all of these questions that I'm like, I didn't think about. That's, I didn't think about that. I didn't, I feel so dumb. Like, I'm like, okay, so wasn't a great idea. You know, if it's like a purchase. Right. Right. She has this list of questions and I'm just like, yeah. I just bought it. I loved it. Yeah. Just winged it and just did it. Yeah. Um, and then my middle sister, she is like, if you, if I go up to her and I tell her like, I'm super excited, you know, about something and she'll just, yeah. Like, oh, that's awesome. You know, she's just so supportive and just always just the sweetest smile on her face and so caring. Both of them are, and it's just awesome. Yeah. She's, we have a great relationship.

Speaker:

Both of her sisters are awesome and I, kudos. And second everything you said. Mm-hmm. Um, your, your middle sister, you know, she really does embody middle kid energy. Yeah, for sure. And, you know, she's, she's got the biggest heart and. I can just remember like one, some of the first times I met her and she's just, she's so kind, so very soft spoken uhhuh, very soft spoken.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Which she gets off. I mean, both my parents are pretty soft spoken. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker:

And your, uh, your oldest sister. And I'm not, you fit in though. I don't know how, um, your oldest sister is, like you said firecracker. Yeah. I remember her girling me when, when we first met. Yeah. And I'm like,

Speaker 2:

yeah. And, uh, it's not firecracker, it's just analytical. Yeah. She's very analytical and has this, the way her brain works is very, her and my dad. Yeah. They're like identical. Oh yeah. Because like I go to my dad the same thing, like, I'm gonna buy this car. And he is like, well, what about the mileage and what about this? And then I'm like, I don't know. I don't know. Don't know. Never looked at it. I'm like, it's actually in Alaska. Like, that's actually a true story, by the way. Did you know that?

Speaker:

No. You tried to buy a car in Alaska?

Speaker 2:

On Craigslist.

Speaker:

Oh, I've been there. Yeah. Three grand.

Speaker 2:

Six. It was a Jeep Cherokee. Yes. That it's always a Jeep. He was like, how's it gonna get here? And I'm like, they're gonna fly it.

Speaker 5:

Yeah. I'm gonna go get it and drive from Alaska to here. They want me to wire the 3000 small bills.

Speaker 2:

That is a true, this is why we made this small bill. That is a true who let us adult because of why would I try to buy a car in it last anyways, I had been

Speaker:

there. Man, that's so funny that we both, we've all fallen for that Craigslist scam. Not all,

Speaker 2:

because my dad and my sister not, would not happen. Oh, this car's real. So then my middle sister and my mom, they are very, their personalities are very, very similar. Very soft spoken kind and

Speaker:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Just like very gentle. Yeah.

Speaker:

So talk about, you know, your sisters, um, they have a sister. They, they have a, a me

Speaker 2:

you. Yeah.

Speaker:

Uh, how was like, you know, did they tease you at all? I mean,

Speaker 2:

oh, I was, I'm their sister man. Like, there was, we fought just like regular siblings, biological siblings fight. We fought and, um, we loved hard and we fought hard. For sure they did. They tease me. Yes. They teased me. They, there was one time, so when growing up, I had my natural hair.

Speaker:

Yes.

Speaker 2:

My fro the

Speaker:

fro

Speaker 2:

and we love the fro. My mom would put my hair in these puff balls mm-hmm. That I hated at first. I didn't hate them, but it was once my sisters started teasing me, relentlessly calling me, Hey, puff balls. And like the way that they said it, it doesn't even sound like Jasmine, you really got mad about that, but you're a kid. It's your sisters, you're kid. And they're like, you know that they're teasing you about it. Yeah. So they'd be like, what's up puff balls? Hate puff balls. Like just, oh. And I was like, it's so annoying. Yeah. Now don't ever put this hairstyle on me again. Like just stupid stuff. And then another thing that they teased me about was being adopted.

Speaker:

I heard that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I heard that there is a nickname that follows that. Yes. That

Speaker 2:

they had a great nickname for me. So is the

Speaker:

greatest nickname ever

Speaker 2:

to you? It's hilarious. So my sisters would call me fed. They'd be like, sup fed. Especially, especially my middle sister. She would call me fed and the way that she would say it, su fed. And I'm just like, and you're probably like fed, like, whatcha you talking about? What's

Speaker 5:

it short for? What's FedEx? Well, I said it, you just, you

Speaker 2:

just gave it up. FedEx I got dropped off by the FedEx man is what they claimed. And

Speaker 3:

just stupid.

Speaker 2:

I don't care.

Speaker:

Every time it makes me laugh,

Speaker 2:

it still makes me mad. Oh, I, and, and the worst like,

Speaker:

I mean, I guess it it came from movie, right?

Speaker 2:

Yes. It came from cheaper by the dozen. I found out it still dont care because the ed kid, it's still funny By the dozen, they called him fed and they thought that was funny. And they were like, we're gonna call Jasmine fed.'cause she was adopted, she was dropped off by the FedEx man and she's black and I'm the only black one in the family. Like, just ridiculous. They're so annoying.

Speaker:

Oh my goodness.

Speaker 2:

So annoying.

Speaker:

Oh my goodness. They called you fun. You love that story. I do, I do. Every single time. It makes me laugh. I don't know why it's so mean and that would've fit in, but

Speaker 2:

it's, I mean, I give it to'em, like, and then I would cry and cry and I'd go to my mom crying and she was just like, well, you know, that just means that we chose you. We were stuck with them.

Speaker:

Fair point.

Speaker 2:

Boom.

Speaker:

Yeah. Mom with the, with the, uh, the points. Oh, she had

Speaker 2:

mom, mama was always dropping wisdom on me growing up. Like as I was growing up in a predominantly white neighborhood, predominantly white school, the, my identity was, I mean, I was lost.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Like that was a huge thing for me growing up was like, who am I? Well, I don't like that. I look different than everybody.

Speaker 3:

Right?

Speaker 2:

Like, my skin color is different, my hair is different, you know, and back then I couldn't just, we couldn't just go to Walmart. We couldn't just go to the store and. Get the right hair care products, you know, get hair care products that worked for my hair. Mm-hmm. Um, we didn't have access to the internet, YouTube tutorials and Facebook communities and all of that where you could talk to other families that are in this situation where you can learn things from them. So it's like, my hair was a challenge seeing that my skin was different, you know, I didn't look like all the other girls. And especially as I start growing up and, um, getting into middle school and high school, that's when it really started to become more of like a glaring, like, you don't want to, you don't wanna be the oddball out, you know, you, you wanna blend in in high school. Yeah. You wanna be like, you know, I don't wanna stick out because of these features. You know,

Speaker:

and I wanna,

Speaker 2:

I wanna fit in with everybody else. And

Speaker:

it's funny that as you talk about what was available at that time, yeah. Like, there wasn't anybody in necessarily in your parents' circle that could help educate you on how to take care of,

Speaker 6:

right.

Speaker:

And I, it is funny, I just thought about this. Yeah. Um, your oldest sister, her and her husband fostered for a few years. Mm-hmm. And they had some, you know, they had black kids.

Speaker 3:

Yep.

Speaker:

And I remember, you know, getting a phone call of how do I take care of this little man's hair

Speaker 3:

man?

Speaker:

And me going, okay, this is what you gotta do. Oh

Speaker 2:

my gosh.

Speaker:

And I'm like, you didn't have that. But I was able to help. Like that's, I just, I, I don't know why that just came to me, you know,

Speaker 2:

that makes me like that. My heart is like. Like, like leaping, like I, I don't think I, I smiled that much in that big ever in my life because like again, growing up and not having access to that.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And then having this full circle moment of like, my sister and her husband are fostering and their fostering black children and they're calling my black husbands for advice on things that I wish my parents had somebody that they could have called, may not

Speaker:

have hair now, but I can. Right. But you said,

Speaker 2:

and you had great, a great head of hair did, and it's like this, the things that, you know Yeah. That, and they recognize like that there are those differences and they were, you know, willing to reach out and ask and. Learn. Yeah. Which I think was, is just awesome. And my mom bless her heart, like she did

Speaker:

her absolute best. She did.

Speaker 2:

I mean, the fact that she, that they were like, we are not only opening our home, we're opening our hearts, we are opening up our family. Like we are bringing you into our life. Yeah. And we are calling you our own. Okay. So my hair looked a little crazy for a few years, like it's gonna be okay. A little crazy. We get to, yeah, a little, a little crazy. But. We gotta see that the pictures

Speaker:

don't look bad. Listen, I, I've seen, I've seen the, they don't look good that bad.

Speaker 2:

Okay. You say that because you love me and I, I got tease them. Track photos, tease. I got teased relentlessly by when we,'cause there, it's not like there were no black people around, like we competed against black schools.

Speaker 6:

Oof.

Speaker 2:

And they were not nice. They teased me, girl, did your hair

Speaker 6:

See, you

Speaker 2:

know, you know exactly how it went. Oh my gosh. They teased me so much about my hair. So, so that was awful. I mean, it was pretty good at basketball and track. So I was like, you know what? I wish I had the confidence I have now. Yeah. Because I would be like, look at the scoreboard, like.

Speaker 5:

This would not be headed for dosage.

Speaker 2:

I'll be like, you look at the, like, all my hair was like breaking off in the back. And I'd be like, well, you're gonna be looking at it when I crossed the finish line. So,

Speaker 5:

man, man, whoa, dare.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. And um, there was another point I was gonna make about my mom and her being just like, the, this woman

Speaker 3:

to

Speaker 2:

learn Yeah. This woman of wisdom. And just because I, it was their faith, right? Yeah. Like, you know, they're Christians and we grew up believing in Jesus. Mm-hmm. And going to church and all of that. And I remember there was a time where I, you know, I, I did, I experienced prejudice and racism and I remember the first time that I ever experienced that and I, my mom came, or I was, we, I, I remember this specifically. We were in Walmart and we were walking around and I was just really upset. I remember looking at her and being like, you know, today wasn't a good day at school. I was like, like there was this kid, he was not very nice. She was asking me questions, you know, like, what happened? Who was it? And I told her and then I was just like, he just called me like a really like ugly name and it just really hurt my feelings. Um, and it, I mean it was like, it was like the word, the word, yeah. That was like the first time I ever hard r hard art. It was the first time like under his breath, like just a lot of like hate behind it, you know, just he a mean one. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure. A

Speaker:

stone cold Steve Austin one.

Speaker 2:

Yes. Yes, absolutely. Where you look at it and you're like, you say that a lot. You say that is your everyday vocabulary, for sure. Mm-hmm. Um, and so that was the first time anyone has ever said that to me. Yeah. And uh, so I was telling my mom about it and I remember. I, I appreciated this response because I, and I think it was a pivotal moment for me, but she was like, she was telling me like, that's an ugly word and I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that somebody said that to you. And then she added, I want you to always remember though, that sticks and stones will break your bones, but words can never hurt you. And some people will be like, but it was that word and it, they were racist and this, that and the other. But that moment, like I always refer back to that moment when she was talking to me about that, because from then on out, I never gave it power over me. I never let it affect me.

Speaker:

You was better than me.

Speaker 2:

I know. How So what'd you do?

Speaker:

We gonna talk about that next episode. Okay.

Speaker 2:

Okay. Okay.

Speaker:

So anyway, you dealing with the white folks. Right. But I never

Speaker 2:

let, I never gave it power anymore. Mm-hmm. And it, it, it was like, I'm not gonna say that I became indestructible. Yeah. Like when it came to, you know, fitting in or getting, you know, mean comments from people, whether it was about my appearance or whatever. Yeah. Um, whether it was specific and, and blatant racism.

Speaker 3:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

I'm not gonna say that I came out and I was super woman and I just attacked all of that and was like, yeah, you, you ain't got nothing on me. But as I got older, the more I could have grace. And I remember thinking like, man, I feel so sorry for him. I feel so sorry that he is growing up in a home that teaches that. You know, like he, he didn't just wake up one day and was like, I don't like you'cause your skin color like that was learned. Yeah. And so, like, my heart actually was like, man, I actually feel really bad for you.

Speaker:

And because if

Speaker 2:

you're raising, if you're being raised by people that have that much hate in their heart for somebody because of the color of their skin, like what else do they hate? And how do they treat you as a person?

Speaker:

Whenever I hear someone talk nowadays,'cause that word racist is thrown around so carefree now.

Speaker 2:

Mm-hmm. It's starting to lose its meaning. Yeah.

Speaker:

And, and, and I can confidently say that you, and, and I may maybe a little bit for me, but mo like really with. You know, where you were at, you experienced what I considered true racism. Oh,

Speaker 3:

yeah.

Speaker:

Where, you know, people, you know, now everybody wants to say, oh, you, you know, you didn't do this slight thing to a different race. Oh, you're immediately, you're a racist. Right. No, you encountered true racist. Racist that wouldn't look at you.

Speaker 2:

Oh, yeah. Like they would move to the other side of the hallway. Yeah. Like

Speaker:

if you touched them, they thought that they were going to, you know, inherit some disease. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

Right. That's right. Right. That's a true

Speaker:

racist.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker:

Versus what I For sure. Versus what the, what, you know, when we, like,

Speaker 2:

they don't even wanna be anywhere near

Speaker:

you. Yeah. Versus what we've seen in the world now where I think that those people are just ignorant. Like, yo, you're just, you're a moron, or you're, you're ignorant. Mm-hmm. Versus a true racist that's like, like if

Speaker 2:

somebody makes, if somebody makes a joke.

Speaker:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Like there were different, I think there are differences, like there can be insensitive jokes. Yeah. But honestly. And I learned this from you. If

Speaker 5:

it's a good joke learned,

Speaker 2:

I mean that's a good, we're setting ourselves up to get canceled. Oh, don't care. Um, no, but honestly, like the thing that I learned from you is like, we do, and I started sending you stuff too. I'm like, we do need to get back to like making fun of each other. Yeah. About our skin. Like, I did that with my parents all the time. I would make the fact that I was the, their only black child a spectacle. We'd go to the grocery store.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And I would be like, mom, I'm gonna go grab something when she's about to get into line so that the cashier wouldn't see me with her. Mm-hmm. And then I'd come around the other side and start grabbing her groceries.

Speaker 6:

I know. And the cashier

Speaker 2:

would be like looking at me and looking at my mom.'cause there's a white lady. Yeah. I mean, there's this black girl that's just grabbing her groceries and I would just not say anything. Grab your groceries and then walk out.

Speaker:

It'd be really funny if you were like, Hey mom, you should play along. I have no idea who this kid is.

Speaker 2:

I mean, she never said anything like she did. She wasn't like Jasmine. Like she, I don't even think she realized what I was doing, but I was deliberately looking at the cashier, like, say something, I dare say something. And then it's like, you know, they don't wanna be like, they're gonna look accusing this black girl of stealing groceries. Try it, say something.

Speaker:

All right. So, you know, let's talk about high school again. I wanna go back to high school.

Speaker 2:

Okay.

Speaker:

And, um, you excelled in, in sports. Mm-hmm. So you were, uh, a standout track athlete. Um, were you a standout basketball athlete as well, or kind of I was. I

Speaker 2:

was. You know, I did a, I did a pretty good You were, I did pretty good. Bad. I was scared.

Speaker 4:

Let, let's talk about, I mean, I was a little

Speaker 2:

scaredy count on the court, but I was good at defense and stealing the ball, so, but getting it in the basket was a little bit more challenging. I could play DI was very fast

Speaker:

shooting. Not for me. So let's talk about that. Talk about that kind of e experience. I know how my, how my experience was at a predominantly white school. Yeah. Being the 0.1%.

Speaker 3:

Right.

Speaker:

What was your experience athletic wise being, you know, the 1% at, uh, a predominantly white school?

Speaker 2:

Um, my experience with it, I mean, I was like, I guess one of the better, especially TrackWise, like I was a track star. Mm-hmm. Like that was my sport. Yeah. Was track and field. Um, and then I did, I loved basketball growing up. I just wasn't as good at basketball. And like I said, I was just timid. Mm-hmm. When it came to. Being the center of attention and shooting the ball. But like, I don't know, track. I felt different being like in my lane and just, I gotta get to the finish line. Yeah. Um, so for me, like that was that I put a lot of my identity in my sport. How so?'cause I, it was a place that I excelled. Yeah. It was a place that I like, I kind of felt like I fit in a little bit more. You

Speaker:

belonged.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. And you know this, because I think it was one of the things that we can really connected on was like, we kind of blend in. We can blend in with a bunch of different crowds. Mm-hmm. In elementary school and middle school like I was, and I still am. Like I, I like Harry Potter. Yeah. Right. And I had friends that were very big into Harry Potter and anime and all of that. And I would sit at lunch with them and we would talk and we would get into all like the nerdy stuff. And then I could also go over and talk to, like the drama folks, because I love musicals. Mm-hmm. You know, so I would talk to everybody that was in drama club and that were, okay, you're gonna, we're gonna do Annie. Right. I wasn't a part of it. I wasn't in the musical, but I'm like sitting there like, okay, I can speak it language, you know? Yeah. I can speak, I can talk about the movie and the songs and like all this stuff. And then I was a part of the track team and the basketball team, and I was on varsity for both of those. So then I was a part of the, the jocks and the popular squad and whatnot. And so I was kind of like a chameleon. Mm-hmm. And so the, my sport was where I was like. It wasn't necessarily like the friends or anything, it was like just the sport. Mm-hmm. It was like me doing something where I'm like, yeah, this feels right. You know? Yeah. I don't know if that was what you were wanting to get at.

Speaker:

Yeah. Talk about some of the accolades that, uh, you accomplished as you know.

Speaker 2:

Ran track in college and that's where, I mean, my faith started, grew way more Yeah. In college. And a lot of that had to do, like, I was so determined to get out of the small town. Yeah. I was like, I, hey, ain't never coming back here. I'm never coming back. Like, I don't like this. There's nothing to do. Like, the people are so closed-minded, blah, blah, blah. Like, that was my mindset back then. And then I get into college and I was like, I, it was such a cool experience to have that diversity. Mm-hmm. And the girls that I met my freshman year, they like just diverse. Right. Hispanic, black, white, like, you know, all. You found your people? I found people, my people and the black girls. Shout out to Hamby Hall because y'all held it down for me. Like real talk. The first time I learned to wrap my hair, they learned you. The first time I learned how to wrap my hair, like they heard my story, they listened, they welcomed me with open arms. And it was like, um, like night and day difference from my experience of the girls, the predominantly black teams that we would compete against who would make fun of me. And then I go into college a little bit. Like I'm kind of scared because I don't know how I'm gonna be received because I'm too, I felt like I was too black for the white girls and I was too white for the black girls. I learned, um, just like cultural differences, you know, like I found, so there were things that I didn't realize were very white because I didn't grow up with black families. It's like I went to a Baptist church with one of my black friends when I was in high school. Yeah. And like that was culture shock.

Speaker 6:

Oh yeah. Yeah. That was

Speaker 2:

culture shock. I was like, why are we here for four hours? It's like start at eight. I was like, why is every, why is everybody dancing? Like, what is going on? Like, I was,

Speaker:

church is a spectacle.

Speaker 2:

I mean, not just that, it was just like they were feeling it and I was like, more power to you. But I just, I am used to sitting down singing hymns.

Speaker 3:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

Having the, the sermon, which was my grandpa, and then going to lunch at grandma and Grandpa's house right afterwards. Like, and then

Speaker:

going to watch the Browns and

Speaker 2:

then going to watch and watching the Browns at their house. Yeah. Yeah. Like that was, it wasn't, church didn't last all day. So it was very different. And then also the type of singing too. Mm-hmm. Like, again, it was very, it was soulful hymns versus

Speaker:

soulful hymns.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Soulful hymns. And then hearing gospel and stuff like that was brand new to me.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So then getting into college, um, I started to get exposed more Yeah. To that and getting exposed more to the black community and the culture differences. So like, there were things that, you know, it was like. You don't like hot sauce? Like, no, I didn't know this was exclusive to the black community.

Speaker:

Frank's. Yeah. It's a natural gem.

Speaker 2:

No, but I do like watermelon.

Speaker:

Watermelon. Yeah. I'm not a big watermelon guy.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Okay. Okay. Um, no, there were just there. Yeah. There were things I started to realize, like food was a big one where it was like, I guess there, I mean there are things that I make that I'm like, man, like if a, if a black person saw me making this who grew up in a black family, they would be like, that's what

Speaker:

Curry,

Speaker 2:

that's, I mean, that's Indian.

Speaker:

Doesn't matter.

Speaker 2:

I was, I thought you were gonna say, because I grew up in Amish country Curry, which I don't think I mentioned that it, well you mentioned it was Amish country, which I'm not Amish, by the way. I'm not,

Speaker:

not

Speaker 2:

not Amish. Neither

Speaker:

her parents.

Speaker 2:

No. Um. Oh gosh. Like, I mean the new like noodles and mashed potatoes and um,

Speaker:

yeah, that's apple

Speaker 2:

butter.

Speaker:

Yep. Fried mushrooms.

Speaker 2:

Fried mushrooms. Yum.

Speaker:

Yeah, I'd never heard of yum.

Speaker 2:

Yum's really good.

Speaker:

It's delicious. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. You add

Speaker:

some seasoning to it. They do

Speaker 2:

fried chicken too.

Speaker:

Yeah. Mom, your mom's a cook. She can go. My mom, my mom can cook. She can throw down. My mom can cook for chef. She made,

Speaker 2:

I also never had baked mac and cheese until I met you and your family and

Speaker:

your mac and cheese. I am a craft got level

Speaker 2:

up. It did, but like, so I like Kraft Mac and. And they're gonna be like, you're gonna lose your black card. It's fine. Take it. Bang. Gave it up. I gave it up a long time ago. Um, but I like Kraft Mac and cheese because it's nostalgic. Mm-hmm. Because I ha I remember eating it when I was in Cleveland. Mm-hmm.

Speaker:

Easy meals.

Speaker 2:

Um, and I was meeting with our social worker and I would be sitting with a social worker and I would be sitting at our little two seat cedar table that was in the kitchen and I was eating Kraft mac and cheese and like I love Kraft mac and cheese. Like to this day,

Speaker:

that is a core memory moment. Yeah. It's

Speaker 2:

like, for whatever reason, it just brings up like, it's like when you smells something

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And it like tastes you, it's like that's what Kraft mac and cheese, that's what craft always brings up that memory for me. It's very weird.

Speaker 4:

Wow.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. So yeah. Baked mac and cheese with your family. Oh man. The first time.

Speaker 5:

The first Thanksgiving with me was wild. Oh

Speaker 2:

man. Coming to your co, the first, the first experience that I had with your family first cookout was the cookout. It was family reunion. Oh my gosh. It was, uh, Memorial Day. Yeah, it was Memorial Day. The

Speaker 4:

Memorial Day family Reunion. Reunion, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

And they threw down fish Friday. Like

Speaker 6:

this

Speaker 2:

is, I never had greens before. I never had baked mac and cheese. I never had Bruno fried catfish. Woo. I never had grits.

Speaker:

Oh my eggs.

Speaker 2:

Oh, yeah. Ian makes Ian's eggs are superior. Like you make phenomenal eggs. They're very good. Yes, yes, yes. I will, I will give you that.

Speaker:

Thank you.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you're welcome.

Speaker:

So, um. College is a special time for you because you, like you mentioned before, you, uh, you're starting to get cult, you know, you're getting a culture shock mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

As you would say. Mm-hmm. Yeah. I'm getting cultured.

Speaker:

Um, but it's also when, and we're not gonna tell this story tonight, but it's also when you met me.

Speaker 6:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker:

Um, and one of the things that I kind of nudged you, nudged you to mm-hmm.'cause I asked questions and mm-hmm. I'm nosy. Um, was if you had, had any contact with your, uh, biological sisters

Speaker 6:

Right.

Speaker:

Or anybody on that side of the family. Yeah. Um, I know we didn't mention it before, but, um, do you know what year your biological mother passed?

Speaker 2:

She passed in 2007.

Speaker:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

So when I was in college, it was my sophomore year of college.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

We were dating. And I went on Facebook and just started typing in their names.'cause I, my mom had told me what their names were. I remember I used to have a picture of my oldest sister. Mm-hmm. And her name was written on it, but I had lost that picture. And so I remember typing their names in the ones that I could remember and I couldn't find them.

Speaker 3:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

Um, and then I eventually, like, it just hit me all of a sudden. And I remem, I put in one of my sister's names who I just, I had forgotten and then just remembered,

Speaker 3:

yeah.

Speaker 2:

Put that into Facebook full name. She pops up and I'm like, is this her?'cause I didn't have a picture of her, so I didn't know what she looked like.

Speaker 6:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So I clicked on her and then I start seeing some other names that look

Speaker 6:

similar.

Speaker 2:

Similar, yeah. And then I found my oldest sister's name and that was who I had her picture.

Speaker 4:

You recognize.

Speaker 2:

Not only did I recognize her, but I recognized her name and I realized I had been spelling it incorrectly. And so once I saw her name, I was like, this is them. Yeah. And I reached out, I sent a message to my aunt and reached out and was like, hi. Hey. Like, I don't know if you guys are, you know, you guys might be my family. Like it was real, it felt really awkward to reach out and say this, but she got back to me like within 24 hours. And if

Speaker 4:

I'm correct, they were kind of looking for you, kind

Speaker 2:

of. They they had no way.

Speaker 4:

Yeah. So

Speaker 2:

to find me, they had no information.

Speaker 4:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

So like the yes and no, and it, like, it wasn't, if they could, yeah. If they could have found me, they would have, but there was just no way that they Yeah. Could have found me. So it was just a very. Divine moment for sure.

Speaker:

So who all did you get connected with?

Speaker 2:

I got connected with all of my sisters. Um, so there's five, there's six of us total I met, I met an aunt, a cousin, grandmother

Speaker 4:

too.

Speaker 2:

Grandmother, yeah. And then, like I said, I found out that my mom had passed away in, I think in 2007, so I wasn't able to meet her.

Speaker:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

But yeah.

Speaker:

Yeah. And I, and I have

Speaker 2:

met my, I've met my biological father. Yes. I had like FaceTimed him. I remember some random Christmas in Dallas. Yeah. Random Christmas. And one, one of my full sister, we have the same mom, same dad. She was like, do you wanna meet your father? She called him sperm donor. But the nickname, I was like, yeah. I was like, like, sure. And yeah, I was, I mean, it was cool because a lot of my life, I had always been like, who do I look like?

Speaker 6:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Who do I look like? I looked in the mirror and I would be like, whose eyes are staring back at me? Yeah. Like, whose nose do I have? Whose mouth? Whose lips? Like, especially growing up in a predominantly white community, like our physical features are different, thicker lips, wider nose, like, you know, just different. And I just wanted to know where I came from. And, and on

Speaker:

top of that too, I mean, as, as we. Get together, get married, start having kids.

Speaker 6:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker:

One of the things that, you know, it's not a huge concern, but it is a concern is medical history. Like

Speaker 2:

Yeah,

Speaker:

I know my family's medical history. Right. We have no idea. Right. So

Speaker 2:

it has been nice to be able to ask those questions. I mean, so far lineage, we healthy as, yeah. Yeah. We're very, very healthy.

Speaker:

I was about to make a really poor joke. I decided not to go that way, but yes. Yes, yes, yes. Um, okay, so kind of wrapping up the, finding the family.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker:

So, um, you know, I nudge you, you find a family you

Speaker 2:

were in, you were just so instrumental in making that happen. I don't know that, that I'm not

Speaker:

trying to cheat my own order. I'm calling, I know you're not,

Speaker 2:

but I'm gonna, I'm gonna give you your flowers because you, I don't know that that would've happened. If you wouldn't have been the one that coordinated behind my back and surprised me, that's where I was going with that. Yeah. So, yeah,

Speaker:

I, um, I reach out to your oldest sister Yeah. And say, Hey, it would be, I think it would be a great idea if you could just, we can orchestrate, you know, some kind of surprise where you come down, I believe she another one of your sisters. And then they brought, she brought her two kids

Speaker 2:

mm-hmm. With her, my niece and nephew. Yep.

Speaker:

Um, and at the time you're a sophomore. We had only been dating for a year and a half. Yeah. Maybe,

Speaker 4:

maybe, yeah. Two years.

Speaker:

I at, yeah, a year and a half, something like that. And I remember that day vividly sitting in our Irvine and having lunch with them and just talking.

Speaker 6:

Right.

Speaker:

Um, take us to that day and your emotions of Yeah. Getting a chance to, to, as you say, look at someone who looks like you. Has to say mannerisms and temperament.

Speaker 2:

Man. Man, that was, that was, that was pretty cool. Mm-hmm. It's like top 10, one of the best experiences of my life. And it was so unexpected. Mm-hmm. I remember being so emotional. I mean, it was, it was very emotional because like you're looking at this person that you're biologically related to.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

That you knew at one point in your life. But because I was so young, like I don't have those memories anymore. And then to look at her and she has a lot more of those memories. Like she, she was older. Yeah. I think she was 11. She was like 10 or 11 Yeah. Years old when all of this was going down.

Speaker:

Yeah. I remember you saying that. She has a lot of the memories.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. So like she like knows this vividly. Yeah. So just being able to meet her mm-hmm. In that moment and then. It was just, I mean, like I said, it was one of the coolest experiences ever. And seeing my niece and nephew there and being able to look at somebody, and yes, we do res resent, like we have, there are some resemblances between us, but I think the biggest thing was temperament and our personalities and mannerisms. Like it was, oh my gosh. Like I've, my entire life I've been a part of this amazing family mm-hmm. That I absolutely adore and love. I have felt like I wa I was in an identity crisis for a majority of my life. Yeah. And I was searching, you know, for who, who am I? Who do I look like? Where do I come from? And I also felt like, um, you know, I was a black sheep, literally and figuratively speaking, um, because I looked differently. I acted differently. I'm like, man, I, I get, I get mad pretty quick, you know, like, where does this anger come from? Because my family, they're very. It takes a lot. Very calm, calm, like for them to like, you know? Yeah. They're very calm. Um, and like, I can just like go zero to a hundred and then I meet my biological mm-hmm. Sister. And I started to find out, like, she was like, oh yeah, that's that Kirkland Blood. I was like, wait a minute. What? There's a name for it. Like,

Speaker 5:

it's a whole thing. Right?

Speaker 2:

It's a whole thing. And you know, back then I was, I was big into, you know, drinking. Mm-hmm. And, um, that didn't help the anger issues. And she was like, yep, I'll stay away from tequila. You know? And I was like, Ooh. I was my favorite.

Speaker:

For those who never met Jasmine during those times. She had an alter ego. We called her Bianca.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. You don't wanna meet Bianca? No,

Speaker:

no. Bianca hasn't been around for years. She's gone. She gone.

Speaker 2:

She's gone. It's just jazz. It's just jazz now. Um, and that was, that was because of the Lord. Mm-hmm. Right? That was, um. Like you orchestrating this God putting so many different people into my life throughout the years. Like I, I said I struggled with, an identity crisis, but I also struggled with, what's the word I'm looking for? Oh, I remember. I remember what I was gonna say. So it's when, um, and it left me, I'm like watching it like go away, you know, when you like have a thought and you're just like, no, it's come back but man, no, it's like right there, what I'm trying to say. Yeah. I'm trying to talk about, not imposter syndrome. That's not what I'm looking for. It might come back to me anyways. So my faith was, it was, it was a huge part, mm-hmm. Of my life. So going through high school, coming into college, meeting you. Mm-hmm. Like there were people that God strategically placed in my life. And I recognize that and I see that. And I'm so grateful and thankful for that because it's like, without him I wouldn't have been able to, I wouldn't have been able to grow and mature and realize like the blessings that I have. Yeah. You know? And it can be really hard when you are in this situation where. I was taken from a bad situation and given this opportunity that I have where I have a family that's taking care of me and loving me and welcoming me in as, as biologically one of their own.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And I still wanna know where I came from. Yeah. You know, and I didn't want that to come across as I didn't appreciate

Speaker:

or ungrateful. Yeah. Or I

Speaker 2:

was ungrateful for the life that I had.

Speaker:

I think that's human nature though. Yeah, for sure. It really is. It's like

Speaker 2:

by design we crave that. We crave figuring out where we came from. Mm-hmm. I mean, if you look at different situations, actually I think there was a study that I found where it was like 95% of adoptees like know they have that desire to figure out where they came from and who they look like. It reminds me of

Speaker:

that, uh. Delivery man movie. You know what movie I'm talking about?

Speaker 2:

I don't think so.

Speaker:

Vince Vaughn or

Speaker 2:

he, I don't think so. He accident. I don't really like Vince Vaughn. So he

Speaker:

accidentally fathers 600 and like 76 kids.

Speaker 2:

Oh

Speaker:

gosh. At a sperm donor. Oh

Speaker 2:

my gosh.

Speaker:

They want to like know who he is, but he like signs a thing Anyway. But that's the whole premise of that movie is Yeah. Is they want to, they're all adopted kids that wanted to know who their dad was. Yeah. So, yeah. Well, let me ask you this as we start to wrap up here. Mm-hmm. Um, you know, we've, we've gone, I remember

Speaker 2:

what I was gonna say there it is. Survivor's guilt. I have to say it before it goes away. Survivor's guilt. Survivor's guilt. Got it. I, I struggled with survivor's guilt. Yeah. For sure. So

Speaker:

do you wanna elaborate on that?

Speaker 2:

Uh, just very quickly, but it,'cause that's a, we could have a whole episode on survivor's guilt. Yeah. I mean, I was given an opportunity. Yeah. And then I'm like, why, why me? Why? I ask that question all the time. Mm-hmm. And there is some days where I still ask that question.

Speaker:

You look at your life compared to, I look at my life, even your, your, your biological sisters. Yeah. And go, man, that, you know, not saying they're not doing well, but my life, but the things

Speaker 2:

that they had to go through, the things that they had to witness that I didn't have to. Yeah. And I had, I think I was very sheltered.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And I had, I grew up a very privileged life. I, I did not want for anything.

Speaker 3:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

I went to college, my parents paid for that. They, they helped me get a car. They didn't pay for the car all the way. Like, my dad was like, you're gonna pay us monthly. It helped me set up an account, but like, he was teaching me, you know, how to do that and instilling that in me. So it's not like he, they just handed me everything. But I was, there were things that. I didn't have to struggle with. Right. You know, I always had a hot meal. Mm-hmm. Three, three meals a day. You know, I went to school, I went to a, a good school.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

I had the opportunity to play sports. I wasn't around violence. Mm-hmm. You know, I, that wasn't my story.

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And like I said, I'm not gonna speak for my sisters and what their story is, but I, there are things that I did here.'cause I, we didn't mention this, but I did meet the, my other sisters as well. I think there's one sister that I haven't met in person yet. Mm-hmm. But I've met everybody else too. And, um, it, it also felt like we never, that we've known each other our whole lives. Yeah. Which is so crazy to think about. We've never had a conversation as adults until now, and you couldn't tell that we. Spent years and years apart. Right. So very, very cool. Um, so yeah, that survivor's guilt. It, it comes up sometimes, but I also just have to remind myself that, you know, God has a plan for everything. And there was a conversation that I had with one of my sisters, and we had talked about, we talked about that.

Speaker 3:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

And she reminded me, she was just like, not to like, sit in that and dwell on that, you know, because another part of that is like, and like, do they hate me? Because I, you know, I was adopted and you know, this family by this family and all of this. And it's like, no, there's none of that. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 3:

Like,

Speaker 2:

they're all very, very happy for me and they're doing well in life now. So it's like we can't sit and dwell on the past. So. Yeah.

Speaker:

Well, is there anything you would like to add as we, you know, wrap up your story? I mean, is there anything that I missed? That. No,

Speaker 2:

you've been freaking awesome. Thank you. You're, you're, you're like the best. You're the best. Seriously. Like this is, I'm just

Speaker:

winging it.

Speaker 2:

No, you, I mean, you, you're awesome. Yes. You, you know how much this means to me, you know, like, this is my story. So I, a question that I just thought of for you is your perspective

Speaker 3:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Of meeting me, meeting my family. Yeah. And being like, I told you that they were white. I told you I was adopted. Yeah. It's usually something that I lead with. Like, I don't just, I should've kept you in the dark. That would've been h hilarious. Hilarious. Oh man, that would've been so funny. I would've been a

Speaker:

top tier joke. I would've been like, kudos. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Now in our relationship, I would've done, I would've been like, yeah, I'm keeping this from, I don't want know who these white folks who, these white people. That's funny. Um, but yeah. What was your,

Speaker:

so

Speaker 2:

perspective. F

Speaker:

That is a great segue to end this episode because we are going to start off episode three. Well, we're going to, uh, I'll answer that question in episode three. Okay. Which we're gonna title controlled chaos, which is, we'll see,

Speaker 2:

we'll see. That's, we're in the works,

Speaker:

which is listen, which is the story of my story because it is, when you hear it, it is truly controlled chaos. There's a lot of this story actually, you don't even know

Speaker 2:

I'm interested, which is wild. I'm ready for this, so I'm so ready.

Speaker:

Um, Jasmine, do you want to hit us with our fake sponsor of the week? Fake

Speaker 2:

sponsor of the week. Big the week. Here we go. So we are sponsored, not sponsored. Sponsored, not sponsored. Okay. I'm, I'm gonna make that very clear. We are not sponsored by Dark and Lovely for all your hair relaxer needs. My mom as a shout out. Shout out to you. I think it was actually just like me that we used a lot for relaxers back in the day. Oh my gosh. But dark and lovely is up there. Yep. Okay.

Speaker:

Anyway, thank you guys. Jasmine Tulp, where, where people can find us.

Speaker 2:

You can find us on Instagram, on TikTok. You know who let us adult pod on Instagram, who let us adult on TikTok. And if you're listening to this and you want to listen to this on all of your podcast listening abilities, Spotify, apple Podcasts, and YouTube, who let us adult

Speaker:

please like, subscribe and we will see and hear everyone on the next episode.

Speaker 2:

Stay tuned. Every Sunday at noon,

Speaker:

who let us adult?

Speaker 2:

We, let's go. Let's go,

Speaker:

let's

Speaker 5:

go.

Speaker 2:

It was better.