Ep.7 - I Couldn’t Escape… Until God Stepped In | ISOSA Testimony

In Episode 7, I sit down with UK rapper ISOSA for a deep and honest conversation about transformation, redemption, and the power of God to rescue us from places we can’t escape on our own.

ISOSA creates music that is raw, relatable, and especially impactful for young people - because it comes from real experience. Having once lived for the world, he opens up about a time when his spirit was restless and distant from God, and how he found himself in a situation he couldn’t get out of by his own strength.

But God stepped in.

As Scripture says, “He brought me up also out of a horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock” (Psalm 40:2). ISOSA’s story is a powerful reflection of this truth - a reminder that no situation is too far gone for God to redeem.

In this episode, we also talk about accountability, growth, and the reality of having hurt others in the past - and how God can transform pain into purpose. Today, ISOSA uses his music as ministry, reaching others who may be where he once was and pointing them toward Christ.

We also touch on the importance of men walking in responsibility and protecting women, reflecting God’s design for love, honor, and leadership. As it says in Scripture, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25).

This conversation is real, challenging, and full of hope - a reminder that God doesn’t just change lives, He restores them.

Tune in to hear how ISOSA went from the world to walking in purpose.

This episode features ISOSA - be sure to check out their work and show them some love!

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Yo. We don't remember the former things, we consider the things of old. We hold up to the new things with a follow instead of a moment. I'm a focus.

SPEAKER_00 0:16

Hi guys and welcome. My name is Annabelle Renee, and this is the Holy Music Chat Room. In this space, we talk about all things Christian music and faith. So today I have with me Isosa. Hi. Idosa, if you could just tell us a bit about yourself. Thank you for coming.

SPEAKER_03 0:32

You're welcome. Thank you for inviting me. I go by the name Isausa. Uh simply means nobody's greater than God. Not simply, but it means nobody's greater than God. And yeah, I make Christian music.

SPEAKER_00 0:42

Okay, okay. So I'm gonna ask you some introduction questions and then we're gonna do some Bible trivia. Before we do some like basic questions about like your career and everything, your music and whatnot. And yeah, is that alright?

SPEAKER_04 0:56

Yeah, cool. You ready? I'm ready.

SPEAKER_00 0:57

Live not. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:00

Cool, that's cool.

SPEAKER_00 1:01

Okay, so can you share with us where your faith journey began or how it began and how it shaped your path into music?

SPEAKER_03 1:08

Where it began. I can say when it began.

SPEAKER_00 1:11

Sure.

SPEAKER_03 1:11

Yeah, like 2022, end of 2022. Um I was going through a bunch of things. Yeah, I could say I hurt a few people in my circle, and um, I feel like for the first time, conviction hit me. But like I actually felt very bad and I wanted to confess what it is like I've done in the past. Um just to come clean. And um, I think from then, as much as I tried to run away from it, something kept pulling me towards like tell the truth so you can start off fresh. So yeah, that's what it again.

SPEAKER_00 1:41

Okay, that's beautiful. That sounds like the conviction of the Holy Spirit, right there.

SPEAKER_03 1:44

Yeah, man.

SPEAKER_00 1:45

Jeez, we're gonna talk about more about that a bit later, if that's okay. So, how do you see your music as a ministry that impacts others?

SPEAKER_03 1:52

The way I see it is there's a bunch of young gees out there that don't necessarily have a role model. I'm not saying I'm the perfect role model, but um, you go on the internet and it's so much easier to see the things of the world than it is to see people and things of Christ. I mean, unless you actually seek it. So right now I'm trying to make music in a way where it's easily accessible to like these young gees and it still looks like, oh okay, cool. This is it's actually hard, you know what I mean? I'm not saying screaming Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, and music isn't equal. I mean, but you kind of need to know how these lots are. Saying we was all young gees once upon a time. I mean, at their age, you can't show me Jesus, Jesus, Jesus, and I'll be like, Yeah, this is cool. So you kind of have to do it in a way where like not tricking them, but this sounds good enough to listen to, and then they start hearing the lyrics and it's like, oh okay, yeah, I know what he's talking about.

SPEAKER_00 2:46

So I see him, okay. Because that kind of leads me to my next question, to be fair. Uh, my next question is obviously Christian rap, or should I say should I say gospel, contemporary gospel music, right? I feel like it sometimes can be misunderstood in society.

SPEAKER_04 2:59

Yeah, definitely.

SPEAKER_00 3:00

So, like, how do you feel like you can make it like your mission to show people the better side of it? Because I mean we just spoke about that kind of just now.

SPEAKER_03 3:12

Just I don't know, like coming to their level almost and just coming as myself, like, cool, I'm in crest. I could have done the whole like suit thing. You see me in a suit every day, you know what I'm saying? And I nearly turned into that if I'm being honest. Um, I nearly did wear a native suit all the time. But then I realised it just wasn't me too tough. And I feel like um coming as myself, I feel like there's people out there that can see it and be like, oh that this guy looks like me, speaks like me. We more or less have been through the same thing, but he's just saying it on a over an instrumental, yes. Does that answer your question?

SPEAKER_00 3:48

Yeah, kind of sure, yeah. I mean, yeah, because you said that it's basically reaching the younger generation in the world, to be fair. That makes sense. Are you ready for trivia?

SPEAKER_02 3:57

I'm not gonna get exposed.

SPEAKER_00 3:59

Have you read your Bible today?

SPEAKER_02 4:00

I read not today though.

SPEAKER_00 4:02

No, it's okay. She said like every single episode, like, have you read your Bible? But they were they're gonna be quite quite fast.

SPEAKER_04 4:10

Okay, cool.

SPEAKER_00 4:10

If you're getting them wrong, there's like nothing happens, you know. We're not gonna condemn you. But come. Oh, let me turn that right down. So, which book in the Bible does not mention God's name at all?

SPEAKER_03 4:22

It doesn't mention God's name at all.

SPEAKER_00 4:23

At all. And you know what's crazy? I didn't know this until Genesis party, um, listening part, watching, watch party. I didn't know this.

SPEAKER_03 4:30

I think it doesn't say God at all.

SPEAKER_00 4:32

It does not mention him. Hey, revelation really, no, okay, we'll give you one more chance and then I'll just tell you about it.

SPEAKER_03 4:42

Um Genesis.

SPEAKER_00 4:44

Okay, don't worry, I'm not judging you.

SPEAKER_03 4:46

I tried to do the beginning of the tried to do somewhere.

SPEAKER_02 4:50

Hey, no, don't worry.

SPEAKER_00 4:51

It's too complicated. It's Esther, the book of Esther. I wouldn't have known that. I didn't know that. Literally, it was at Jennifer's um watch party when she asked the trivia. I was like, I don't know what the heck that is. But no worries, that's cool. So which prophet married a woman described as unfaithful as a sign to Israel?

SPEAKER_02 5:10

Hey, I'm gonna guess what was this? Wait, say the first again?

SPEAKER_00 5:14

Which prophet married a woman described as unfaithful as a sign to Israel? Okay. Do you want me to tell you the answer? Okay, it was Joseah. Hosea?

SPEAKER_03 5:28

Oh Hosea. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 5:31

Okay, don't worry. Don't worry.

SPEAKER_03 5:32

It's cool. I'm leaving sighting today.

SPEAKER_00 5:35

Yeah, you're doing great exactly. Do you know what I mean? Okay, cool. What was Jacob's name changed to after wrestling with God?

SPEAKER_03 5:42

I know this one.

SPEAKER_00 5:44

Yeah. It's one of those ones. It kind of just slips off your tongue. So Jacob was called Jacob.

SPEAKER_03 5:49

Jacob asked questions in front of a camera. It's mad.

SPEAKER_00 5:52

It's okay. Don't worry. You're doing great.

SPEAKER_03 5:54

But I actually know. Wait, um, Abraham.

unknown 5:57

No.

SPEAKER_03 5:57

Hey, Jesus.

SPEAKER_00 6:01

I mean, no, Abraham was changed to Abram, no? I was showing our colours today.

SPEAKER_03 6:09

I don't know, you know. You're gonna say it and it's gonna get me mad.

SPEAKER_00 6:13

Just think about it. You got some seconds, don't worry. What do you change Jacob's name to? Is it that's what I said right, yeah?

SPEAKER_03 6:20

No, I don't know, man. It's gonna be a badge. It's gonna be a badge. Show me, show me, show me. What say that again? See, yeah. Israel. You know, yeah. I was good to say it, yeah. I was good to say Israel. I said, nah, I sound like surely I sound TV, forget Nah.

SPEAKER_00 6:46

I mean like I said, we're not gonna we're not gonna condemn you, is yeah. Anyway, you got that correct. Bad eye. Yeah, man. Bombastic side eye, matter of fact.

SPEAKER_04 6:54

Honestly.

SPEAKER_00 6:55

Okay. What prophet was taken to heaven in a whirlwind of fire? So, in other words, didn't die.

SPEAKER_03 7:01

Here to go back to you know, because I'm about to get zero out of zero, it's dark.

SPEAKER_00 7:06

Do you know of the prophets in the Bible that didn't die?

SPEAKER_03 7:09

No, you know.

SPEAKER_00 7:11

Okay, so that question would be a little bit out of pocket. Is it Elijah?

SPEAKER_03 7:18

Cool. So I after this, I'm going straight to my Bible and Saline.

SPEAKER_00 7:23

You've got this, don't worry. Okay, so how many disciples did Jesus have just before he was crucified? Sorry, I was like, what the heck? What kind of question is that? I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 7:32

Will it be 11? I'm gonna bug it.

SPEAKER_00 7:34

You're right.

SPEAKER_04 7:35

I'm upset with myself. Let's go, let's go.

SPEAKER_00 7:38

No, you got them correct. Okay, cool. Which king asked for wisdom instead of riches?

SPEAKER_04 7:44

Solomon.

SPEAKER_00 7:44

Amen.

SPEAKER_04 7:45

I'm upset. I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_00 7:47

You've got this, don't worry. Okay, now this is a trick question. It's the last one, but it's a trick question. What was the forbidden fruit?

SPEAKER_03 7:54

The forbidden fruit? Yeah. There wasn't a forbidden fruit.

SPEAKER_00 7:57

That's it. You got this, you got this. There we go. Well, thank you for joining me with trivia.

SPEAKER_02 8:03

I'm vexed.

SPEAKER_00 8:04

You're not proud of yourself.

SPEAKER_02 8:05

No, I'm upset still.

SPEAKER_00 8:06

It's okay. It just gives you something to go home and just be like, okay, I didn't.

SPEAKER_03 8:09

Send me those questions. I might as well go saying I need to find wisdom, knowledge, and understanding.

SPEAKER_00 8:13

Amen. And you will do. What does God say in his word? He said he gives wisdom without reproach. Amen. Let's go. Okay, so is there any particular scripture that has encouraged you through your journey as an artist?

SPEAKER_03 8:26

Again, it's not basic, but you know what I'm saying? It's very common. Um, literally, Psalms 23, 1. Uh, the Lord's my shepherd, I shall not want. I feel like for me, anyways, it kind of just reminds me that God's in front. Like, I should never be seeking stuff he doesn't want me to seek. Do you know what I'm saying? Because I almost become like my own God, my own Eda, and it's like He is my shepherd. At the end of the day, He's never gonna lead me down a path for me to like die. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. His path is life. So for me, that kind of keeps me grounded all the time. Like I feel like sometimes I get a bit too wrapped up in trying to um dictate everything and be my own boss. But then sometimes I realise that I've got to take a step back. And if God ain't telling you to move left, bro, stop trying to move left. I mean, chill. So yeah, I'll say I'll say Psalms 21, 23, 21, 23, 1.

SPEAKER_00 9:14

Okay, Psalm 23, 1. Got you. Okay. So at your listening party the other day, right? Someone asked you, like, whose sound inspired you.

SPEAKER_04 9:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:24

I was looking at that prison with a sign, like, I was literally gonna ask that tonight. So literally, that's my question. What artist or genre genre of music inspired you growing up?

SPEAKER_03 9:33

I'll say Drake. Yeah. Drake, J. Cole, Kendrick Lamar. You said these people before as well. Yeah, yeah. Same people. But yeah, I feel like I feel like back in the day, I'll say more Kendrick and Cole moving forward, I've kind of kept the same identity. Obviously, Drake has kind of changed, but old school Drake, do you know what I'm saying? Like 07, 08, 09, chap Drake.

SPEAKER_05 9:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 9:57

Like I feel like he kept it very much real. Like he used to used to speak about his relationships, his feelings. I mean, even if it sounded corny or if it sounded like, bro, saying because as men we grow up and we get told you can't express your feelings, you can't create this.

SPEAKER_02 10:10

Right.

SPEAKER_03 10:11

I feel like Drake, Drake did it and he switched it around. I mean, he made it cool. Like I said, I was eight, nine, ten, thinking I knew what love, thinking I knew what love was. Yeah, in my feelings and that I'm going to school, listening to Drake, thinking that oh man's been through laugh. So yeah, I say to those artists there, that element of just keeping it real, telling a story, expressing themselves. Um, I feel like it's rubbed off on me.

SPEAKER_00 10:39

I see. Okay. So I was just talking about music. What's your favourite song of yours and why?

SPEAKER_03 10:46

My favourite song of mine, it would probably be No Worries.

SPEAKER_00 10:50

I love that song.

SPEAKER_03 10:51

Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 10:51

That's my favourite as well for real.

SPEAKER_03 10:53

Um, I feel like No Worries was one of the because I remember, I remember being in my in my scripture at the time. I was proper in my Bible, I can't remember what's what book I was reading at the time. It could have been Corinthians, but I was proper studying, like, I don't know what happened at the time, but I was proper in there just studying, and then obviously when I've heard the instrumental, I heard it on TikTok. Where in the man, the person who made the beat, I ain't heard him make a beat since like I kind of stopped making music, I stopped making worldly music. Um so when I've when I seen him on TikTok, it was mad random. And then I've heard the beating, and I thought, whoa, like, what's this? I'm saying, and I don't know, it just hit man, it did something to me. And um, because the um because the beat wasn't out yet, I just started writing to the TikTok video because I was just I was just like, no, I need to, it's too much. And um I didn't I didn't know how to start it. So I kind of just went back to scripture and I went, I saw I'm saying Caribbeans, um, did not remember the former things, nor consider the things were old. And I literally just put it in there and I tried to just write from there and yeah, man. So when I was doing that, I was just throwing bare things in there. I was trying to throw bare scripture in there, and um it worked. So yeah, I had fun, I had fun making that track. I made it quickly as well, I think maybe like a day or two.

SPEAKER_00 12:07

Really? And it sounds so like that song. I feel like there's so much depth in the song. Like sometimes I'll be listening to it and I'm like, this is I just know how to explain it. I'm not really good with English, you know.

SPEAKER_04 12:18

I'm basically my fifth language.

SPEAKER_00 12:20

Do you know what I mean? Like, it's whatever. But I hope you get what I mean. Like, it's honestly really deep. And sometimes I'll just have it on replay. Like, I know you say in the song as well, probably not gonna get replays, but um, I can't remember, my memory's bad at last. It's not a lot going on, guys. I'm gonna I love the talk. Just keep it like that, okay? But um, I know as well in your listening party, even though this is gonna come out in a few months, you spoke about how someone asked you the question of have you ever gone to the studio and God just said no. So, I mean, obviously, how do you feel like because you said that yeah, there's been moments like that. So, how do you stay like grounded and stay obedient to God in those kind of moments when you feel like yeah, the song is, and then God just says, I forget about it.

SPEAKER_03 13:01

I think more time, um, like I said, with my music, sometimes there's times where as much as I'm speaking about my own life, it has other people's truths in there as well, and people that are close to me, and I can't sometimes I've got to be mindful for them as well, because at the end of the day, I'm making music, people can hear it, and it's like if you know me, you most likely know who it is I'm speaking about, what it is I'm speaking about. There's times where I've made music like that and I want to post it, like I want to release it, but at the same time, I can't be selfish. I'm saying, because I could go, oh no, this song sounds sick, post it now, and I've now essentially hurt someone. That's true. I mean, so I just don't think that's fair. So there's been times like that where I've kind of just had to leave it to the side and just let it go. Like, I've literally got a song that could have been on this EP, like if it fit perfectly. Do you know what I'm saying? My manager Doug knows, in it, we fight about it all the time, innit? But I've shown him numerous times, like, bro, as honest as that track is, it's it's very sensitive. You know, I'm saying there's certain things I need to do before I get there. So if I do post it, I feel like I'm just I'm doing it for my own good. I'm saying that Bible says do things for do things that work best for everyone else as well. You can't really be dolphis or you know.

SPEAKER_00 14:07

That's so true. So obviously, you've you spoke about like I'm I'm literally going a lot based off of what I heard in your thing as well. You even previously said just now that you used to make secular music. Yeah. Would you say it was secular or worldly? And do you know the difference?

SPEAKER_03 14:22

I don't know the difference, you know. I thought they were both the same.

SPEAKER_00 14:24

No, so okay, so secular music is more or less music that just doesn't glorify God.

SPEAKER_03 14:28

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 14:29

That could be any song, like a love song, happy birthday song. Worldly music is more music that talks about worldly things, like you know, battles for the stuff that God hates, should I say?

SPEAKER_03 14:41

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 14:41

So, with that being said, what would you say your music was more like?

SPEAKER_03 14:44

A bit of both, if anything. It just depends on the mood I was on or who I'm featuring with.

SPEAKER_05 14:49

Right.

SPEAKER_03 14:50

Um, because I did used to speak about things I shouldn't be speaking about, like maybe like speaking about this woman, I'm saying, or things that I've done in the past, etc. etc. But in a way where it was like I was making sex or being a woman as a kind of cool, like I'm that guy, do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. And then obviously it I would say it turned more into like secular music where I kind of stopped glorifying the things of the world, but then it wasn't making music that glorifies God either. It was just I've done this, I've done that, trying to throw advices in there. But yeah, I'll say a bit of both.

SPEAKER_00 15:21

So, what would you say the transition was like?

SPEAKER_03 15:23

I think at first it was hard, it wasn't crazy hard, but there was difficulties in it because I didn't think rapping about Christ was possible in the sense of like doing it in a way that sounds cool. Like I said, I don't feel like the younger generation will take to a tune that's just you know, like ABC, happy, happy Jesus Christ, etc. etc. So I still wanted to stay true to myself because I've always been a storyteller in terms of like how I rap or when I speak about my past. So I still wanted to put that and just make it real and honest. I mean, make it like make music in a way where like I know I'd listen to this as well. Yeah. Saying it's not just all that doing this because it says Christ, so let's just throw it out there and let it be. It's just no, bro. I feel like God's giving me a gift, so use it properly. Of course. RAM, I'm saying, and throw Christ's name in there, so let's hit it deeper. So I think that's that probably was the most difficult part in that just still making it sound good enough for like anyone to listen to, you know what I'm saying? Because I've got so many friends that are still not in Christ, right? I mean, and I still want to make music where they listen to it and it's like, bro, this is hard. And then they listen to it more, and it's like, oh, yeah, this is actually speaking to me, or I'm getting convicted right now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:36

So I see, yeah, because God has called us to be the like the salt topia. So and yeah, I feel like that's definitely what you're doing with your music. Big up you. So I mean, the music industry, from what I've seen anyway, and from what I've heard from others, can be very challenging. So, what would you say that God has taught you in moments of struggle or in a challenge?

SPEAKER_03 16:56

I would say patience. Patience and like trusting them. I know I feel like sometimes, especially like me and Doug, it's one of those things where when we've got an idea, we really want to just execute it and throw it out there. But sometimes budget isn't budgeting, sometimes time isn't time and we get frustrated, but then in that moment of frustration, we kind of need to remember like, bro, maybe it's not working out because it's not his time yet. So it's like, what do we do now? Get into prayer, you know what I'm saying? Leave it to God. We could fast, you know what I'm saying? Just things like that, and just being okay with waiting for his call, you know what I'm saying? Because again, I feel like growing up as a man or growing up as a boy turning into a man, it's more or less like I'm saying, go get it, your goal get or your hustler, you know what I'm saying? Grand Tony Falls, you don't sleep. It's like, bro, all of those things there you carry with you. So when you're when when you're trying to do it for Christ as well, you kind of end up wanting to do the same thing, but you need to understand that, bro, you need to be dependable as well. Do you know what I'm saying? That's another thing. You like you grow up being taught to be independent.

SPEAKER_05 17:58

That's true.

SPEAKER_03 17:58

You get into Christ now, and it's like you need to scrap that and be dependable on him. And that's hard, you know what I'm saying? That's definitely hard. I think, yeah, that's probably answered the question.

SPEAKER_00 18:09

Yeah, definitely. I mean, even if it was just to touch on that, I feel like it it sometimes can be quite hard to trust God. Yeah, definitely. Especially when it comes to like, okay, for example, things you want to do in your career, your music. If you have, like you said, for example, budget. Yeah, like you you could be trusting God for the budget, and maybe it's just not coming in the time that you need it. Let's say you've got the booking there and you need to book it before a certain time or whatever, and you don't have the budget. It's like, are you gonna trust God? Because you know, he tells us to trust him, or you're gonna go and do your own devices and stuff like that. And I feel like it can be very easy to think, oh, like let me just go and sort this out, like God's taking too long, even though that's not necessarily what we say, but you know, just let me try and find provision for whatever the heck it is I need. And yeah, that's you know, I feel like God says we have little faith.

SPEAKER_02 18:55

Yeah, no, honestly.

SPEAKER_00 18:56

But yeah, we just have to trust him through the seasons where it may not seem like it's coming real or or however he will show up. Yeah, definitely. That's one thing I can always say. Like, every time I've ever trusted in God, he's always shown up. Or, like, let's say I was too weak to do something myself, God has always shown up because I've put my trust in him. But sometimes, like I said, it can definitely be hard to trust him in the process when everything feels so heavy, but then we have to remember he's also the god that calms the storm. Damn. So, you know, but okay, at your listening party, because I'm gonna say there's a million one times, guys. He had a listening party. Well done. Thank you, thank you. Uh so after listening to track three that day, and even again after, you said there's nothing in the world, it there's nothing in this world for us. So, did you go through something in life that made you feel that way, or is it just that you've realized after stepping into the world with Christ that there's nothing here for us?

SPEAKER_03 19:50

Yeah, I feel like when I got into Christ, like getting into Christ was so much different than like I'd say like after baptism, saying because it was a learning process. Right. I used to just think obviously God's always there, because he's always gonna be there. But then I just used to think getting into Christ, getting into church, like going to church, that's it. I'm saying, like that's that's all you gotta do and you're trusting your good. But um, when you start studying a bit more and start like praying a bit more and getting closer to him and trying to like isolate yourself from certain things and certain people, you start realizing that all the things that I was doing before genuinely had no gain to it. Do you know what I'm saying? And when I deeply, all the things that I used to confess, all they did was have consequences. I'm saying, whether it was hurting myself or hurting people, setting me back, making me look, I'll say rubbed out, you know what I'm saying? I feel like back in the day I had a name, you know what I'm saying? It wasn't the best name. Yeah, I had kind of had like a stair of that. Just I don't know, I just didn't like it. But at the time I didn't realise it. I used to think it's okay, but same time when I got into Christ, I started realising, oh, that is that's is that cool? Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah would you rather be known as that or a son of God, you know what I'm saying? Um so say, yeah, man. I just started realising better things, or even just going certain places, doing certain things. I mean, like I used to smoke weed a lot. And when I realized there's nothing here for me, I mean, man's just slow. I mean, literally just being a slough, just delaying things. Like when I stopped smoking weed, I started realising there's so much things like my memory, like I know it sounds mad, yeah, but my memory of certain stuff wasn't the greatest. It's like these are things that maybe just root back to like two, three years ago that I couldn't even tell you in detail about. But it's like my m my memory wasn't always that. So when I started realising all of these drugs and just going to certain places, doing certain things, it was just taken away from me. So I'm saying it was just literally just bit by bit just taken away from me. My identity was getting lost somewhere.

SPEAKER_00 21:49

Right.

SPEAKER_03 21:50

So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:51

Okay, I mean I have a kind of a question off the back of that. Yeah, you're speaking about how your identity was lost. So how do you feel like you found your identity in Christ?

SPEAKER_03 22:00

I just started realizing I was definitely made for something greater. Or we're all made for something greater. It's just at the time we just don't realise it because we're doing things that that pleases our flesh. I'm saying our spirit is dying, like it's starving, it's just dying. And then when you get into Christ now, you start realizing it feels way more better to like feed your spirit than it does your flesh. I'm saying because you'll do certain things and you even start feeling bad. I mean, you won't have peace, trouble finds you, trouble follows you. But then when it comes to like feeding your spirit, there's a sense of calm to it, a sense of peace to it, understanding, and even that now, like the more I stayed away from certain things I was doing, the more I started realising, like, goddamn, like, I've actually got a purpose. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_04 22:44

Of course.

SPEAKER_03 22:45

I'm actually way more focused. I'm saying I enjoy what it is I'm doing away from the world. So yeah, I think that's how I found myself more time. Just being a bit more proud of who I am, not proud as in pride, but just more like, oh, this is who I am now, and I and I genuinely like it. I mean, to the point where I hate who I used to be, saying so, so yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:05

Yeah, of course. In your opinion, what's the biggest misconception people have about Christian rap music?

SPEAKER_03 23:10

If only did you I'd say I think people just people might think it's it's corny. I feel like when you when you explain to them that you make Christian music, it's to them it could be a case of like holy holy hallelujah type thing, proper like just Jesus this, Jesus that. And I'm not saying it's not Jesus this, because it is Jesus this, Jesus, that. But um, I think some people just they almost have like ABC nursery rhymes in their heads, you know what I mean? And um, it's not that I'm saying this, it's definitely great cool music. I mean, and um I think another thing is people might think we might be a bit arrogant as well. So I'm saying they might think we're better than them, and it's not even that, it's just more time I make Christian music because I know what it is I've been through in my life, and I just this is my way of giving people my testimony, trying to get people to turn their life around and get saved by Christ. So, yeah, man, I think the two main things for me anyway is that one corny and two, it might be oh, this guy thinks he's better than us. It's probably not that I'm not better than you at all. It's if only you need. Do you know what I'm saying? So I see.

SPEAKER_00 24:16

I just had something I was gonna say, and it just left my brain. I don't know why, but I mean, it was basically along that line of people thinking that as Christians we feel like we're better than the. I definitely agree with that. And it's it's crazy because any little mistake you make now as Christian, they're looking at you like, aren't you supposed to be holier than thou? But um, yeah, interesting. Okay. Do you mind sharing your testimony with us, Jay? I so so.

SPEAKER_03 24:40

Yeah. I would say before curse, I was kind of just living a life and it just involved like drugs. I'd say like legal money and illegal money, just being a woman as well. I would say like, I used to describe myself as like a serial killer. Um, because I was definitely hurting people behind their backs, very much content with like stabbing people behind their backs for my own gains, I'm saying, especially if they didn't find out about it, um, I was okay with it. And um, yeah, man, I think I did a lot of that, you know what I'm saying? A lot of that, whether it was hurting girls, whether it was hurting like close men and friends, not showing up for what I'm saying, even just not even just showing up for what could have been like family members, I'm saying, just not showing up because I wanted to do what I wanted to do, do you know what I'm saying? I wanted to get benefits from it. And um, yeah, I say 2022, God definitely put me in a place where like I couldn't escape. And I hurt someone that was very close to me. Through that experience, God showed me like He's not, He's not about to let me run away from this situation. Because I was so used to running away from hurting people and just bro, like, I'm saying, like, let's leave it to the side type of thing. Well, it's done, like, what are we supposed to do now? Um, I kind of had that kind of arrogance to it where it's like I've hurt, you're crying about it, I don't know what to do about it. I'm saying, like, it's all it's done, it's done. I'm saying it's evil. I continue lying to you, I'll tell you the truth, and you get upset. Like, what do you want to do? But um, yeah, and again, not that not that who I hurt deserved to be hurt, so I'm saying, because no one deserves that at all. I just at the time I feel like God definitely didn't allow me to run away from it. And I feel like if I did run away from it, I don't know if I would have been who I am today. It could have happened later, but at the same time, your days aren't promised. Do you know what I'm saying? So I could have run away from that. Dad. So I'm saying been in hell. I definitely would have been in hell, you know what I'm saying, with the way my life was back then. So yeah, again, like I said, 2022, I was put in a situation where I couldn't escape. Even when I tried to run away from it, there were so many different factors that made me stay. Do you know what I'm saying? Even one of them I was touching on, touching on my listening party that um I had a brother in Christ that's a mental to me now. Right. Um, that randomly added me on Snap at the time. And usually when people add me on Snap and try to tell me about pressed, I'm just looking at it like, hey bro, you know what I'm saying? Let it go. I'm saying, like, calm down. I mean, but I don't know. When he when he had added me, um, he basically just told me to continue doing what it is I'm doing. Like, like try again, basically, and and don't stop. And I don't know why I opened his message, you know what I'm saying? Because you know them times you can well we can still hear swipe on that, but yeah, saying them times heart swiping was really easy. I'm saying the thing. So when I've seen it, I don't know what made me open his his message and actually, okay, cool, like I want to hear what he said. Obviously, being me, I was asking him questions. I'm saying, like, what's my favourite number? Because he was telling me things like he was sent by the Holy Holy Ghost. I mean, what's my favourite number? What number am I thinking about, etc.? I was just doing silly things like that. And it's not like he was a I mean a guru or something. I'm saying it wasn't that, it was just more of a case of like he was definitely a brother that was in his, I'm saying, in his words, I mean, led by the spirit. And like, you can tell by his answers, it was my genuine, do you know what I'm saying? And he said certain things that it just it it made sense. I'm saying, it wasn't just said certain things that made sense, and I thought, damn. And obviously at the time, I was kind of asking God for signs. Um, not to know that if he's real, because I know he was real, I just didn't, I just didn't think I needed a relationship with him, but I just needed certain signs, and certain signs I definitely got. And um, it just got to a point where like I knew I couldn't run away from a certain situation, so I stayed in it. And then through that, I started peeling, like that the old me started peeling off. I started feeling convicted for certain things that I've done. I was really in a place where like conviction was hitting me like crazy, like I couldn't sleep without saying certain things. I mean, just because I knew how much I wanted to move forward from it, but at the same time, I didn't want to move forward in a lie. You know what I'm saying? I didn't want I didn't want to be this person, but how I got here, I got here through a lie, by a lie, you know what I'm saying? So um, I think, yeah, like between like 2022 to like, I'd say, I'll say even like beginning of 2024, I went through like a good phase of just I did this, I did that, I apologised this. I'm saying, just cutting off a lot of people, just isolating myself from certain things, certain people, just so I can get closer to Christ. And um, yeah, man, he just like he just definitely taught me a lot. I I definitely I definitely seeing how effective I was back then, like who I was back then was very ugly, very evil, I'm saying deceitful. I was definitely walking around without wisdom or knowledge. Yeah, man, I feel like he just revealed all of that to me. And yeah, I'll say he like he legit brought me gracefully, I'm saying, because like he definitely brought me gracefully because certain things I thought was going to destroy me, um, but it didn't. I'm saying it kind of just got me closer to him. So yeah, my testimony kind of just came from just hurting someone very badly and um just him keeping me in a place where like I couldn't escape like I usually knew how to escape. Um it was yo, listen, you're going to you're going to learn that you can't be doing this anymore. Do you know what I'm saying? And um, yeah, man, it changed me massively, man. I started realising, bro, like your actions are very loud. Do you know what I mean? Like you need to start caring for people. Saying it's not, yes, this is your life, but it's not only about you. I mean, God didn't send you into this world to just be about you, yeah, because then we'll have a world where like it's just full of selfishness. Not that it isn't, but saying um, yeah, nobody would know how to show compassion to others and and and love, so yeah, man.

SPEAKER_00 30:15

That's so interesting. I was just thinking just as you were speaking, in your song No Worries, you kind of speak about I feel like you kind of speak about this. I kind of remember the verse though that you say, I can't remember. It's crazy. I listen to that song almost every day, and I just can't remember.

SPEAKER_02 30:29

I don't know my buzz either. Definitely it's so bull.

SPEAKER_00 30:32

It's funny because if it was clear now, I'd be able to buff or bow for words. You basically talk about how something, something, something, leaning for health, had a smell, your soul was reeking.

SPEAKER_04 30:43

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:44

That's something, something.

SPEAKER_04 30:46

I know exactly what we're talking about.

SPEAKER_00 30:48

Thank you. Um I'm not just making things up, but it kind of reminded me of that verse that I can't remember of right now. Yeah, but that's really interesting. Thank you for sharing that with me.

SPEAKER_04 30:58

Welcome.

SPEAKER_00 30:59

I really appreciate it. I also, to be fair, too touch on that as well. I feel like I I realised in your music you you do speak a lot about you and how you feel and things you've been through. And even in your new music, the song Best Friend. Yes, we love that song. Yeah, it speaks about it a lot as well. And I know someone at your listening party also mentioned the fact that you know you kind of speak about yourself, your well, past, present, and future, and then you also speak about women in there as well. So, I mean, what was your inspiration on that song?

SPEAKER_03 31:29

Um, obviously, I've got a good woman by my side and um and I feel like I've watched her Be Patient with Me. And it's not always the easier, you know what I'm saying? Times where she's definitely been hurt by my like, do I say just childish ways. And um, I feel like through that experience, I've definitely understood or learned that like I'm saying, us men get it tough, don't get twisted, but like girls definitely get it tough, you know what I'm saying? I feel like hewlots are very much put last place in a lot of things, and I've there's been times where she's confounded in me, spoken to me about certain things, or like we could watch something together, there's a girl getting hurt, I'm saying, for whatever reason, and I can see how much it upsets her, and it's like because she looks at it and it's like this is how the world is, you know what I mean? Like girls always just always put last, you know what I mean? And um I feel like as a man in the Bible, we are called to protect, provide, and loving it. And I feel like there's just especially when you're in the world, as a man, you don't really have a care for girls. I mean, a care for women. You kind of just see them as like, oh, I like you, I'm gonna deal with it, I want to deal with you. And then you're gonna move on to the next one because there's so many women out there that will give you attention. And I feel like if we are gonna protect women, it's gotta start from the men. I'm saying we've got to start drawing guys out. I'm saying, we've got to start drawing each other out, being honest with ourselves. I mean, at the end of the day, a lot of us have mothers. I mean, by God's grace, of course, not everyone's mother's still here. I mean, but a lot of us grew up with mothers, still have mothers. Some of us have sisters, I've got a sister, and it's like, how many guys have you seen will bug out if something happened to their mum or their sister? But then, bro, you're you're that guy, you're still that guy that that hurts other girls. That girl's probably got a brother as well and a father as well, do you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_04 33:13

So, yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_03 33:14

Yeah, man, not everybody might, not every man might like it. Do you know what I'm saying? You know, but then again, the way I see it is or just being immature. I mean, if you have a problem with me saying something that benefits women, then it says a lot about you. So I mean, at the end of the day, bro, men don't need as much protection as women do. I mean, I'm not saying we we're not emotional and that, etc. etc. But like, we've got to look after the girls, man, because at the end of the day, I'm pretty sure, saying, obviously, I can't speak on your situation, but there's girls out there that have been hurt and will still care for the person that hurt them. And it's like, bro, we're taking these stuff for granted. I'm saying, like, understand that she's still loving you, even in your mess. So that's kind of why I touch. And again, that's not perfect, but then this is why I throw in there things like my spirit had reached, etc. etc.

SPEAKER_00 33:56

That's the one I'm looking for. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 33:58

The truth is, like, I'm only advising you because I was dead, you know what I'm saying? I used to be that guy. I mean, I have hurt women, and I've hurt women a lot. I'm saying, yeah, man. So I don't know, man. I just almost feel like I've got a duty to say something. I mean, it's not and it could just be little things. Just making, I don't know, just you hear your boy is doing something, just let him know that, bro, that that isn't right. You don't have to fight him and be him up. It's not that, but sometimes say something so that he knows because a lot of the times man them do things, and as a community, we hear it and we don't say nothing. But not saying nothing kind of like makes him feel like it's okay. Because that's what used to happen to me. I used to do things. I'm saying essentially let the guys know and no one G-checks me. Yeah. So I'll start thinking that's okay. Yeah. If the man them aren't G-checking me, I'm saying a girl can't G-check me. You know what I'm saying? But that's how it just was how it was. But started realising, bro, it's not, it's not that man. I mean, like, so yeah.

SPEAKER_00 34:50

I see. I was actually just gonna ask that very random question of whether you would speak up if your friend was doing something, if you knew of somebody that was doing something, but you kind of answer this.

SPEAKER_03 35:00

I'd not all the I wasn't it wasn't at that all the times, sometimes you kinda get scared at your young, you still want to be cool in the batch. I mean, you don't want to be that guy, oh like bro, don't be very mad. Like, you know how many speed, you're not even a marriage or like man, etc. etc. So it's not that, but um, yeah, man, I'm getting older and I've saying we've got to do the right thing.

SPEAKER_00 35:19

Yeah. So, leading up towards the end, what kind of things do you think we'll be seeing in your future projects?

SPEAKER_03 35:29

I'll say still more or less the same thing. At God's grace, I can go into more depth in certain things, certain areas, but I'm obviously I'm waiting on God's timing. Um, still waiting on like, not waiting, but there's still healing that needs to be done.

SPEAKER_00 35:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 35:43

So yeah, I'll say I say more or less of what's going on right now. I think in terms of like music videos, I kind of want to get into a space where like me and my manager are making more movies than just music videos, probably transition into that and like proper like put, you see like the things that I say, proper put that into like a screen, and actually I'm saying a little bit more clarity to like my music. So I'd I'll probably say that. And then obviously after this EP or EP's dropped, but I'm I think this year trying to do way more features. I'm saying got more features, tap into like I mean, guys that I don't really speak to, you know what I'm saying, fellowship with them and I'm saying be getting a lot more features.

SPEAKER_00 36:23

So make the music for the Lord.

SPEAKER_03 36:25

Oh by God's grace, man.

SPEAKER_00 36:26

Amen. Okay, nice. So, would you mind closing us out in a prayer or words of encouragement? No? If you start speaking, okay then, guys.

SPEAKER_03 36:37

Yeah, man. Um, so we bow our heads. Uh-huh. Our father, I just want to thank you for today. I just want to thank you for your grace and your mercy for waking us up and again reminding us that we have purpose and that you're that we're special. Um, we just want to thank you for health. I want to thank you for the ability to do things that not not everybody has the opportunity to do. We want to thank you for your forgiveness. Um, we want to thank you for always showing up in our lives. We pray for more healing, more strength. I pray that somebody gets touched by this this video, a word, that they get encouraged. I'm saying that a prayer was answered. And I just pray that as we continue to move forward, we move forward with you, knowing that your way is the best way and that your way leads to life. Again, we just want to thank you, and we ask that you just continue to help us from the inside out. In Jesus' my name, bro. Amen.

SPEAKER_00 37:29

Amen. Amen. Thank you so much. And guys, here we have it. It's my name is Annabelle Renee, and this is the holy music chat room. I'm here with I Sosa. I so where can they find you?

SPEAKER_03 37:42

Insta, TikTok, I mean streaming platform, but um I saw so the first on most of the platforms. Obviously, the music platform is just i also, but my tick tock and my Instagram ice also the first. And yeah.

unknown 37:55

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 37:56

You can find me in church as well.

SPEAKER_00 37:57

Yeah, that's it. What chance? No, I'm joking. Then got an all that. No worries. But thank you for watching, guys. And remember, this is not just about the music, this is actually about the salvation that you can find through Christ. So give a life to Christ and remember that I love you, but God loves you more.

SPEAKER_01 38:17

The person I was that gave you the ick, and it now makes sense when my spirit had dick. Because I had formed at the starting so ugly. I'm far from the image. God made me end, I'm just being real. I wasn't cautious about my people and feeding my thoughts. I'm just being real. I'm just being real. Your eyes can be wide open and to define details. I'm just being around.