Welcome And Today’s Commandment

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Welcome to the Kid Us Out First Podcast, where we're building transformed lives one message at a time. Each week you'll hear Christ-centered sermons from Dr. J. Perry Fowler, rooted in the truth of God's Word. This is where real faith meets real life, because a life built on truth is a life that lasts.

The Wicked Bible Story

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Well, last week when we were studying together in the book of Exodus, we came across this one particular passage. It was actually Exodus 20, 13 that says, You shall not murder. Today, that of course was four words. Today we have five. So we expect a very long sermon because of it. But thou shalt not commit adultery. Thou shalt not commit adultery. Exodus 20, verse 14. In 1631, there was a Bible that was put out. It's called the Wicked Bible. Any of you ever heard of the Wicked Bible? The Wicked Bible, before it was called the Wicked Bible, was called the Sinners or the Adulterous Bible. And the reason why is because there were two typos in that Bible. When they printed it, what we know happened is the book of Deuteronomy, Deuteronomy chapter 5, verse 24, there was a point where the word greatness was changed, and there was a typo, and it actually had a, when it was changed, it was changed to another word, a couple of words, as a matter of fact, that uh ultimately had a sexual connotation, but none were as bad as Exodus chapter 20, verse 14, because what it said is as thou shalt commit adultery. He left out one word. And instead of thou shalt not commit adultery, it said, Thou shalt commit adultery. And when that happened, of course, it caused all kinds of consternation. But yet it wasn't but for a year. I believe those people must have not read their Bible very often because it took a whole year for them to discover that typo. And when it happened, King Charles, who was the one who wanted this particular printing of the Bible to happen, uh, as well as the Archbishop of Canterbury, they charged the publisher of that, Robert Barker and Martin Lucas, charged them 300 pounds, which was a ton of money at the time. But also what we know they did is they ordered that all 1,000 copies that they knew that were in existence ordered them to be burned. And then ultimately from that, what we know is Robert Barker, who was the printer of that, he ended up in a debtor's prison, and he died in a debtor's prison because he never could pay back the money that he owed because of this mistake. Well, that's not the end of the story. The end of the story goes this way: people uh who were looking at this uh and have looked at this in history have discovered that it's very probable that there was another couple of people, Bonham and Norton, who were also publishers, who somehow sabotaged this and uh created these typos so that they might be able to ruin Barker's reputation, steal his lucrative royal printing monopoly. And uh that's kind of the rest of the story. But I want to just say, if you find one of these Bibles, be sure to let me know. And the reason why is because I'll buy it from you and we'll split it 50-50 because they're worth $100,000 right now. How's that? Uh but yet when we look at that, we say, you know, we we look at the stories like that, and we say, okay, one word made all the difference in the world. That's true.

One Word That Changes Everything

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The word no made all the difference in the world. The question is, is what are you gonna say no to? And that's really what the these commandments that we're reading. It says, thou shalt not commit murder. We saw that last week, and I know most of you would stop and say, Well, I'm not really tempted to kill anybody today. Or maybe perhaps you might be even saying, I'm not really tempted to commit adultery. What does this have to do with me? But yet what we do know is we know statistics in America, this may be more relevant than you think, because 34%, let me say that again. I was shocked to hear this. 34% of spouses said when they were polled in America that they have cheated on their husband or wife at least one time in their marriage. I was shocked at that. I just couldn't even believe it. I'm like, really, this really is going on in the world today. There's so much of that that is happening. And it's just shocking to be able to see that and those kind of statistics. But evidently it is a very, very important thing for us to study.

Why Adultery Still Matters

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Not only because it's relevant in our society, but also it was relevant in Moses' society. What we know is while God had descended from Mount Sinai, descended on Mount Sinai, and he began to pin with his finger, etch in stone, these commandments, the Bible tells us what the children of Israel were doing down at the base of the mountain. The Bible says this. The Bible says they were engaged in wild revelry, eating, drinking, and playing. The word playing is a euphemism for pagan sexual immorality. Can you imagine that? God is giving the Ten Commandments up on the mountain and down at the base of the mountain, the people who were to be the recipients of these commandments, those people were committing adultery. And not only that, but they were worshiping a graven image. That graven image was a golden calf. In Egypt, there was a pagan god called Hothor that looked just like this golden calf. And what they were doing is they were raising up in worship, celebrating fertility, and as they did that, they were committing lewd acts. As a matter of fact, later in verse 25 in chapter 34, we read that they were, of course, doing this. They were they were participating in what they, the Bible says that they were, they were, they were mocking God more or less through their act. The word parah was used there, the Hebrew word, which means to loosen and become naked. So what we see here is God here is saying to them, you shall not commit adultery, and at the base of the mountain, they were doing just that. They were plaguing, they were loosened in nakedness. And what we see from this is we see a call from God to understand something about marriage. Marriage is sacred. I want you to say that with me. Marriage is sacred. Marriage is, say it with me once again, sacred. Through God's eyes, what we see is as God is looking down at them and thundering from Mount Sinai these words, you shall not commit adultery. And when we see this, what God is saying, listen, I'm going to give to you a commandment that should provide guardrails for your marriage. And among those is that in the sexual relationships. So as we pause this morning and we simply read these five words, you shall not commit adultery, what is God saying to us about our marriages? What is God teaching us? He's teaching us how to, what I believe to be a fair proof of our marriage, of course, but also how to build a marriage. And today, when we live in a world and a culture that is so much forgotten and has so much pushed aside this call of marriage and this blessing of marriage, we should come to these particular words and recognize how sacred marriage is. So, how do we celebrate the sacredness

Israel’s Revelry At Sinai

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of marriage? Well, the first thing we do is we magnify the gift of marriage. And I want you to do that today. I want us to magnify, and I want you to go home today, if you're married, I want you to magnify the blessing of marriage. And a lot of people today are saying, I'm not gonna get married. Or maybe perhaps they're entering into relationships and they're living with someone and they're saying, you know what, I'm never gonna get married, or I don't want to get married, or I'm holding back on getting married. Listen, one of the things that God would say to you today, if that's where you're at, God would say, Listen, I want you to understand marriage is one of the greatest gifts you'll ever be given. And the gift of marriage is celebrated in this commandment. Now, as we look at this call to thou shalt not commit adultery, we pause again to look at some of the statistics in our world today. As a matter of fact, I was kind of shocked at this. There was a survey of American Laugh by the AEI, and AEI said this. They said that 42%, this is shocking as well. 42% of women polled said they consistently check their husbands' cell phones to see if they're cheating on them. Now, what this tells me is there is a degrading and there's there's a disassimilation of understanding the value of trust in a relationship. Listen, every relationship is built on trust. And that's why Jesus even tells us, and God tells us, without faith, it is impossible to please God. Why? Because every relationship must be built on trust. And when you marry someone, what you're saying is that I'm trusting that you're gonna keep this covenant. And they're saying together, and you're saying together, we're going to come together and we're going to live life together in this covenant, sacred relationship called marriage. And as we do that, what we are going to do is we're going to learn how to trust and how to live in tandem together as the Lord has called us to this wonderful gift called marriage. And so this morning, what we see is we see that often in America, families are under attack. As a matter of fact, marriage is under attack. Go listen to a comedian talk about marriage. Most of the time, it's full of jokes about marriage and about a wife or about a husband. And we live in a world like this, but yet this is not new. From the very beginning, what we know happened is Adam and Eve, the first institution that was brought together was this institution called marriage, and immediately what we see is Satan showing up, if you will, in their own garden, in their own home. They're trying to disrupt that relationship. And then after they failed, then they had children, and the next thing we see is a disruption in the family. It relates to the former uh commandment that we read about last week, you shall not commit murder, and we find Cain killing Abel. So listen, in the crosshairs of Satan himself,

Marriage Is Sacred

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the crosshairs he has in America and around the world today, he has the family in the crosshairs. He is after your family. He is after your marriage. So with that, what do we do? We celebrate, we return to the truth of God's word. We return to God's word, and the Bible tells us this in Proverbs 18, 22, he who finds a wife finds a good thing. Now that's a good word. That's not what you hear comedians say, that's not what you hear most people say. Usually what you hear is something negative about marriage. That's the reason why is because the enemy is in every way trying to disassemble the family today. But God is saying, I want to elevate the family today. I want to, I want you to understand, he who finds a wife finds a good thing. So with saying that, can I get any man to say, amen? Amen. So with that, he who finds a good wife finds a good thing. And you know what else it says? And finds the favor of the Lord. The word favor means a flourishing delight. In other words, God loves your marriage. God loves this beautiful covenant called marriage. It's sacred to him. So what do we learn about it? We learned that first off, it's God's plan. In order for us to really understand marriage biblically, we have to pause and look at what Jesus said. In Matthew chapter 19, verse 4, he said, Have you not read this? Say that with me. Have you not read? Well, if you haven't read it, here's what he said. He says, He who made them from the beginning made them, here it is, male and female. He made them male and female, and he said, For this reason, a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined, or to cleave to his wife. Now, this is the words of Jesus. Jesus here is defining marriage. He says, A man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. And so here we see this definition of marriage laid out very early in scripture. And so when you receive this gift of marriage, you're receiving something that God created. In the same way he created the world, he created marriage. It was his first institution, and when he did it, he delighted in it, and he said, It is very good. Amen? It is very, very, very good. Now there's two things that Adam and Eve did not have. One of the things that they did not have is they didn't have a belly button. Did you ever think about that? The other thing that they didn't have, they never had a date. But what we find happening is God, in his plan for marriage, God did this. God took Adam and Eve, and they were divinely joined by Him. God did not create them. Notice this, he didn't say, listen, you're gonna date a while. You're gonna hang out in the garden for a while. You're gonna have a kind of a relationship together for a while. No,

Magnify The Gift Of Marriage

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God said, Listen, I want you to know you are created for each other. And he divinely joined them. It wasn't to be a casual connection, it was to be a sacred union. And that's what God did. When he created, that's the first thing he did. And so Adam, I kind of laugh at him because here he has these words that he says to her. There they are. God joins them together in the garden. He does the first wedding, and when he does this, Adam makes a statement. He says, You are now bone of my bones. You are flesh of my flesh. He wasn't a very romantic guy. He was basically just saying, Hey, baby, you're the bones, I'm the skin, or I'm the bones, and you're the skin. Whatever, let's get together. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what? That's kind of what he was after. He he just kind of, I look at that and I say, that was so unromantic. Couldn't he have like come up with something better? Like say, you know what? I believe there's angels because one just fell from heaven. Right here, there you are. Something. But yeah, he said, you're like a I'm like a skeleton without you, baby. But yet he was right. Why? Because we see God gave this marriage priority. And the word there that says a man should leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife, then literally the picture means to be conjoined or to be glued together. So while Adam wasn't that romantic, he did have it right. He said, Listen, you want to know how close we're gonna be? You want to know what this is going to be, Eve? We're going in the same way that we understand anatomy, here's how this works. Skin goes over bones, and you are taken from my rib bone. I want you to know, you and I, yes, it's true, I'm like a skeleton without you, baby, and you're like floppy skin without me. That's really what he was saying. He understood at least the concept. And it's a concept that we need to celebrate today. We need to communicate. Listen, when you come together and you become one, you enter into a covenant, you're not two people, you're one flesh, and God has called you together and me together to pause this morning and to celebrate this glorious thing that he did in creation. So it is a God-given priority, this joining together. Now, what Jesus furthermore said, he said this, he said, What God has joined together, let no man separate. So he's saying, Listen, I want you to understand when you get married, God joins you together. The word there is a word from which we get our word to yoke. And so that's kind of a uh it's kind of one of those one of those terms that you would often think a farmer would be talking about. For example, he would take two oxen and he would yoke them together. Why? So that they could do work together. So God joined you together if you're married today with your mate, so that in turn what would happen is that you would be joined together to do his work. That's why God says, listen, don't be unequally yoked with unbelievers. That's why God says, listen, don't date a non-Christian if you're a Christian. And it's not a popular thing to hear today, but it's what Jesus said, it's what the Bible says. Why? Because you're being yoked together with that person for a kingdom cause. And so God is calling us together and calls two people together, and he calls them together because he has work for them to do together. Now, what's very strange about this is in a farmer's understanding of yoking, is they would never yoke a male and a female together. That would never happen. And the reason why is because the male animal would have more strength and the female animal would be not as strong. Furthermore, there would be a little bit of distraction. Can I get a witness here? There would be a little bit of a distraction with this male animal, which we are most of the time, guys, you know, with this female, because there's something, there's an attraction going there. There's something God created in creation for that to happen. And so normally that wouldn't happen. But do you know what God did? God did something that would put his signature on marriage.

God’s Design For Marriage

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He said, I'm gonna yoke a male and a female together. He did that for his glory. Why? Because it was for the purpose of what we know to be that they would be like puzzle pieces together. A man and a woman fit together like puzzle pieces in purpose and meaning and service. And so God gave us all different abilities, male and female are different. Can I get a witness to that? Amen. It's so true. And in 1951, there was a there was a particular dance called the tango, and there was a song that came out called It Takes Two to Tangle. Have any of you ever heard that? It takes two to tangle. Now, what we know about the tango is the tango illustrates the male and female relationship because it requires two partners, and while they move often in tandem, they also move sometimes in opposition. Can I get a witness to that? Of course we know. Listen, guys don't always think the way that girls think. If you don't believe that, just have some children. My son has the only granddaughter I have, and he said, I sit and watch her, and he says, there is no doubt God created girls differently than guys. I said, You think? You should know by now, you were raised with two sisters. But it really came home to him because he began to see that from from the children, he began to see he's got two boys, another boy on the way, and we have Queen Elizabeth, which we love, which is always on the pedestal, but she's so different. She's so different. And why is that? Often she's in opposition to the boys, she's different. And this is what we need to understand. God created male and female different for a purpose. And while it sometimes creates opposition, like the tango, when you think about the tango, the tango, often they're in tandem and then they're in opposition, but it creates something beautiful. And so sometimes the challenges that we have in marriage, that illustrates a little bit the challenges that we have in marriage. Sometimes the opposition we have in marriage is nothing more and less than God's choreography. What God is saying is, is I created you different so that you could have influence on one another, and together you would become one and you would serve me in the path that I have created for you for this journey called life. So listen, just because there might be opposition in your relationship from time to time, stop and say, God, what are we learning from this? What am I learning from this? How can I come together? How can we as two tango and do what you call us to do in life? Because we have been yoked together for the glory of God. So with that, God gives this gift, this gift between male and female, this gift of marriage, and it's sacred and it's a covenant, and God calls us to it. And God says, listen, I want you to enjoy this gift of marriage. I want you to enjoy it and understand this is all for my glory. Now, the second thing that we see when we study

Yoked Together For God’s Work

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this passage is not just a celebration of marriage, but also we see how to avoid the traps that malign our marriage. And one of those is adultery, obviously. And Jesus talked a lot about that. And adultery is that no wonder God says, do not commit adultery, because that is that is a sacred trust. And trust is so important in the marriage relationship. Now, I've done a lot of premarital counseling as a pastor with people, and I always ask a question. They look at, I give them out homework, and one of the questions is simply this why do you want to get married? And what do you think? I just want to poll it real quick. Why do you think people say they want to get married? Does anybody want to say it? Somebody said money out there. Don't know that everybody says it. Say it together. You know what it is. It starts with an L and ends with the E. It is O V in the middle. Love. L-O-V-E. People get together because of love. And they say, listen, we're in love with each other. And uh I hope today you're not like the lady who uh somebody asked her, Why did you get married? And she she said, Well, we met at a at a uh she she said I was I was working uh for a travel agency and he was the last resort. I hope you don't feel that way today. Listen, I hope you understand this is a gift that God has given to you. This is not last resort, this is a God-given calling. And listen, if we're gonna live together in the journey of life, God says, get married. Get married. But he says that listen, when it relates to sexual immorality, he talks to those that are married and he says, Listen, do not commit adultery. Furthermore, Proverbs chapter 22, verse 14 says, adultery is a trap. Now I want to talk about several traps. You know, you think about the devil today and what he does, he's always setting a trap. The Bible says he stalks about like a roaring lion, seeking who he may devour. And if and if the family is in his crosshairs and he wants to in every way try to disassemble a family and disassemble the what I know to be the example and the illustration that God has put on planet earth in our world so that turn that that it would reflect Jesus Christ. Marriage is that because Jesus says, listen, he's saying the church is the bride of Christ. And he likens himself to a husband. So the picture that God wants to give to the world through our marriages is that this is how sweet it can be when you follow Jesus. Now, so the devil's trying to set traps all the time. And one of those traps, I'm just going to cover a few of them. One of them is unmet needs. I want you to think about this. For most men, I have a degree in sociology. I studied this quite extensively. I looked at it again this week. And for most men, when they say they have an unmet need, you know what they're talking about? They're talking about their sexual needs. But for women, if you talk about their unmet need, what they would say, well, this is my emotional needs. He's not listening to me, or I need to be heard, I need to be loved, I need him to hear my heart. We hear those things all the time. But because of that, what we know is God is saying, Listen, I have created you differently. And this, these differences are for my glory. They're to balance you out. But do you know what this says? One of the least selfish things that we can do is we can look at our maid and say, How can I meet their needs? How can I serve them? How can I do this? And the Bible has all kinds of incredible information on that. It talks about sexual needs. It says the marriage bed is undefiled. The Bible even talks about withholding from one another, and he he condemns it and says it's it is a conjugal right. So it says, and people freak out this uh with this, but so often in premarital counseling, I'll sit down and say, listen, we're gonna talk about sex. And they look at me and they're like, We are? And I'm like, Yeah, God says you need to do it. And all the guys say, Man, I wonder if I can pay this guy some money for this, you know. But then, but then we talk about the emotional needs. Why is it that this is such a tug of war? I'll tell you why it's a tug of war. One reason, because of selfishness. And the call of God is for us to say, listen, the focus is not me, it's he. Or the focus is not me, it's she. And when there's two people working together in tandem saying, listen, we're gonna we're gonna meet one another's needs. We're gonna, we're gonna not have unmet needs in our relationship. We are gonna grow in this relationship. God will grow your marriage. God will grow your marriage every single time. The second thing is uh that is a trap that Satan sets is the trap of unfulfilled expectations. This is what happens. People get married, and maybe a few months into it, maybe

The Tango And Marriage Tension

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a year, maybe it gets to the seven-year itch, I don't know. But somebody will say, Boy, this is not what I thought I was going to get. And probably you've heard that, maybe you've even thought it yourself, but here's how it works: a man comes down the aisle, the woman comes down the aisle, and they together say, I do, and then they find out for the rest of their life what they just did. That's how it works. That is exactly how it works. And the challenge here is to understand something about our mate. They were not meant to be the person that is going to fulfill and fill up that hole in your heart that only Jesus will fit into. Jesus Christ is the only one that can meet your every single need. And that's why we need Jesus in the middle of our marriages. And that's why we need Jesus in our life. Because He will always satisfy. Amen? He will always satisfy. And the third trap is unresolved conflict. I've told this story many times, but so often men will say, every time my wife gets mad at me, she gets historical, and the response is, is you mean hysterical? And he says, no, historical, she tells me everything I've ever done wrong. Listen, don't do that. You know what we have a tendency to do? We have a tendency to judge. You talking about judge not lest you be judged. You know who we judge the most? Our mates. So often we look at them and say, listen, this doesn't fit, this is not right, this is wrong. And what we know is we know in this relationship that we have, God has called us. God has called us to work together. Now I want to just say something, this is kind of a side note, a personal note, but I want to just say, as a pastor, I've been a pastor for 40 years. And being a pastor for 40 years, what I've learned is is over four decades I've learned that most people will not come and sit down with a pastor or a Christian counselor until their marriage is on life support. I've seen it so many times, and most of the time what happens is the man comes in, he sits down and he says, Will you fix her for me? And she looks over and she says, Will you fix him for me? And the reality is so often it becomes a tug of war. Who can I tell has done the worst? And let me always come up with something negative. What would happen if we actually said, Help me to understand what I can do? Help me to understand how I can assist you, how I can grow in you, and you can grow in me and in our relationship. What would happen? It would change everything. Let me pause and also say this. Because people wait until their marriages are on life support, you know what the number one reason why they say they won't go to marriage counseling is? Number one reason we don't have the funds. Well, it's funny, we have funds to get our nails done, we have funds to buy a $40,000 car, we have funds to do everything else, but we don't have funds to invest in the most important earthly relationship that we have with our mate. And I want to say this one of the best things uh that you can do, and that I can do, and we've done this, is first off, go on a marriage retreat. But second off, let me just say, you don't have to have your marriage on the rocks to go to a counselor. Now, let me just warn you on this. Not every counselor do you want to trust. There's some folks out there that will tell you all kinds of stuff. You know why? They don't base it on the word of God. But if you need a counselor, let me just encourage you to not wait until your marriage is on life support. Let me just encourage you to say, you know what, in the same way I changed my oil in my car, why don't I just come down and every now and then, let's just go to counseling. See, so many people don't want to go to counseling because they don't want to be told what they might be doing right or wrong. And I'm gonna encourage you, it can be something that you can do, and you can say, I mean, you

Traps That Wreck A Marriage

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can make a date out of it. You can go and say, hey, after we go and we have our counseling, we're gonna go over to Texas Roadhouse. Hallelujah. We can and you sit and you you you you talk about stuff. Let me just tell, I'll tell you, as a pastor, as a pastor, sometimes I carry a lot of load and a lot of stuff. I go sit down once a month with a Christian counselor just to talk about stuff. I'm not ashamed of that. I'm online. Listen, why would we not invest, and why would I, as a pastor, not invest in the church myself by making sure my heart, my mind, my spirit, my needs are being met. Why would I not do that? It's so important to look at this and to say, you know what? You can have preventive maintenance for your marriage. But so many people don't do it. They put their money into everything, their time into everything else, and they're running crazy, and then they get to 60 years old and they wonder, what just happened? And one of the reasons why the Bible tells us, Paul says this, it says the older women are to teach the younger women to love their husbands. Do you know why it says that? It says it because so often, this is another thing, so often what happens is when you have children, you focus on the children, you forget each other, and you get to 60 years old and you wonder what just happened. Happens all the time. And so younger women need older women to say, listen, don't forget your man. And needs also older men need to speak into the life of younger men like I am today and say, listen, don't forget your wife. Listen, one of the most godly things you can do is give your kids a bedtime for Pete's sake. And spend time talking, sharing, growing. Don't forget your marriage. You heard it here, folks. Because God wants your marriage to thrive, not just survive. The final thing is uh in this whole thing is there's a trap called unkept vows. And uh I'll just talk about this by telling you a little story. Uh a few years ago I lived in Auburn, Alabama, uh, home of Auburn University. And guess what's in Auburn, Alabama, besides a uh mediocre football team sometimes, but you know it's okay. We have goalish, we're gonna do better this year. But it's young college girls, and there's a bunch of them. And one day I remember going down to the local grocery store. It's called Bruno's that was standing there, and I I it was one of those days when I just kind of wanted to have a day off from being a preacher. Does anybody you're not a pastor, so you don't know what that's like, but sometimes we get that way. And so when we want to kind of a day off from being a preacher, what we do is we put on shorts, and I had a Van Halen shirt on. I'm I'm thought nobody will know I'm a preacher with my Van Halen shirt on. And I went down there, by the way, I like him, I like Van Engelen, but nonetheless, uh I was standing in line at the grocery store, and these two young college girls were in front of me, and I was standing there just trying to get the milk and eggs or whatever I was trying to get that day. And I'm not joking, the next Sunday I was going to preach on Exodus 20, verse 14, and which is you should not commit adultery. And while I was standing there, those young college girls were in front of me. They checked out and they were walking out the door, and the guy that was bagging, he whistled over at the other cashier and he said, Hey! And the girl that was checking me out turned and looked at him and said, You're married and you have three children. You know what his response is? It's okay to look, just don't touch. Have anybody ever heard that before? It's okay to look, just don't touch. And so what happened was as I was standing there and I'm thinking, okay, I'm taking my day off as a preacher. I'm not gonna mention, I'm not gonna get into this. I'm just gonna stand here and I'm just gonna do my thing. But you never take off, you may take off a day from being a preacher, but you never take off from being a Christian because God always has you on call. You know what I'm saying? Same thing for a preacher, really. But what happened was is this they got this lady and the bag, grocery uh the bagger, they kind of got into a debate over whether or not it was okay to look and not touch. And so they're going on, and guess what happens? Here I'm standing there in my Van Halen t-shirt, just trying to mind my own business. And that bagging guy looked at me, had no idea. Obviously, I was a preacher, I had my Van Halen t-shirt on. And so what happens is he says, Hey, mister, I'm like, oh no, here it comes. Mister! And he said it in that Alabama draw. Hey, don't you know, Mister? Tell her, let her know it. Let her know it. It's okay to look, not touch, isn't it? To which I said, Well, I said, Do you really want the answer? He said, Yeah, tell her. I said, Well, Jesus said, that's how we start. His eyes went from that small beattie to that big. And he's like, Oh no, here it comes. I said, Well, Jesus said, if a man looks on a woman to lust, he's committed adultery in his heart. That's all I said. And she turned and looked at him and she says, Yeah, and I believe you were lusting. I went home, took off my Van Halen t-shirt, and moved on through the day. But listen, when you make a vowel, when you make a vowel, it ought to be obvious. This is my girl. This is my wife. This is my husband.

Counseling Before Life Support

SPEAKER_01 40:14

It ought to be obvious. Not just by what we say at the altar, but what we say out in public. You know, I think about Joseph. Joseph, of course, here he you remember the story. Joseph is in Potiphar's wife's house. And Potiphar's wife had to be just absolutely beautiful. I mean, the governmental people of Egypt were given their pick of whoever whatever woman they really wanted. And Satan set a trap for him. And she was in pursuit of him. But you know what Joseph did? Joseph didn't linger. Let me encourage you. Joseph did not linger. Joseph ran. You know, the temptation was strong, the opportunity was secret, and nobody else was watching, but Joseph ran. Sometimes victory is not fighting, sometimes victory is absolutely retreating, it's fleeing. See, purity is protected by distance, not by denial that temptation exists. Running from temptation is not weakness, it's wisdom. Furthermore, and let me say this: when you think about Joseph and you understand the trap that was set for him, Joseph may have lost his coat, but Joseph did not lose his integrity. Do you know why? He learned to run. And the Bible says over and over, matter of fact, 27 times it says, flee, youthful lust. And we have single young men here today that you're saying I'm being drawn in, and I'm I'm I have this gift that God has given to me to give to my future wife. And no matter what trap it is of the world that say, listen, you don't need to hold on to that. You don't need to keep that. Listen, don't you listen to those lies. While there may be many people in here that would say, you know what, I didn't save myself from marriage, I guarantee you, every one of them will say, I wished I had. I wished I would have saved myself from marriage. Every young lady that does the same, I wished I would have saved myself from marriage. You know why? Because it is a sacred thing that you can only give away one time. I encourage you to give it to your wife or to your husband. Everything always gets silent when I preach the word. The whole thing is don't get caught in Satan's traps. Let me take this thing home. Make Jesus the Lord of your marriage. Make Jesus the Lord of your marriage. The invitation here is God is saying, do not commit adultery. Do you know why he can say that? It's because he is Lord. When you read the words and the language and the title God gives himself in the Ten Commandments, he uses a word, the word Yahweh. In the New Testament, when he talks about marriage, he uses the word curios, which is the word Lord. Do you know what both those words mean? It just means owner. And I want you to say this with me today. God is owner. By his very title, he's an owner. And you know what that means? If he is the owner of everything, guess what he owns? He owns your marriage. If he, some people say, well, I want Jesus to be Lord of my marriage. Do you know what that really means? Don't just say that. When you say Jesus is Lord of our marriage, what you're saying is, Jesus owns my marriage. I don't own it. I'm a steward of it. And what that means is that we all have been given a gift from God that God owns. And when God owns it and we take it and we see Him as the owner of our marriage, we look at our marriage as different. We have been given a sacred trust, young man. When you married that girl, you were given a sacred trust. Young lady, when you married that man, that was a sacred trust. Folks that have been married 40, 50, 60 years, praise the Lord, but God gave you a gift that was a it was a sacred trust that you would honor God with that because He is the owner and you're just the steward of it.

Unkept Vows And “Just Looking”

SPEAKER_01 45:36

Now, with that, that changes every way you think about marriage. And you know how I know God's the owner of marriage? There's a Bible verse in the book of Peter that says this live with your wife in an understandable way that your prayers will not be hindered, right? Live with your wife in an understandable way that your prayers will not be hindered. Do you know what that tells me? God says, if you're not living in an understandable way, then what you're doing is God saying, you're just gonna affect my relationship with you. Let me read the rest of that verse, though. See, we often quote that part of it, but we fail to read the whole thing. 1 Peter 3:7. Husbands, live with your wives in an understandable way, but this is what it says in the middle. Showing honor to the woman as a weaker vessel. That gets everybody wound up. It doesn't mean mentally, it means physically. And by the way, men that compete in women's sports are gonna beat them. Come on now. Most of the time. Let's use our brains, man. You put people talk about Christians checking their brains at the door. I think the world has checked its brains at the door. Come on now. Live with your wife in an understandable way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel. Get this. Since you are heirs of the grace of life, don't miss that. Let me take this thing home. Do you know what an heir is? That's somebody that was given an inheritance. And when you think about an inheritance, you think, well, that's what I get when mom and daddy pass away, we close down the accounts, we pay off the funeral bills, and then we get this inheritance, whatever's left over, we get it after they're dead. But in the Middle East, what would happen is so often men would pause, daddies would pause, and they would say, Listen, I want you to get your inheritance before I die. A great example of that is the prodigal son. The prodigal son came and said, Daddy, can I have an inheritance? And what he was more or less doing, it wasn't that abnormal for someone to give the inheritance. You just didn't ask. That was disrespectful, and it's basically saying, I wished you were dead. Or you're making the wrong choice. I should have this right now. Selfishly, he just wanted to live and use daddy's money and do whatever he wanted to do. But it wasn't abnormal for a man to give to his son an inheritance before he died because he'd want to know how he's going to use it. He'd want to enjoy watching his son enjoy the fruits of his own labors. But God says, I want you to understand what I do when I give you a wife or when I give you a husband. He says, Husbands, live with your wife in an understandable way, honor her as the weaker vessel. And then he goes on and he says this. He says it very clearly, as heirs of the grace of life. In other words, the life that you had before, that is just changed courses. Hers is just changed courses. And I've given you a life to live together, and it is like an inheritance from God. You know why? God owns your life. And God owns your marriage. So because God owns your life and owns your marriage, the whole goal is to say, God, I want to honor you with what you've given me. A gift for me to enjoy with the wife of my youth and with a husband

Joseph’s Run And Real Wisdom

SPEAKER_01 49:51

of my youth. And as we grow older, we grow. And older women teach the young women how to love their husbands. And older men come and pour into the young men. You know why? Because by that time we should have learned something to share. And the church of God is glorified. Marriages are magnified. And Christ is exalted and lifted high. So, Lord, with that understanding, we come to you today, Lord, and we just say, Lord, we want you to be our owner. We know you are already own us. You bought us with a price. Every believer has been bought with a price. God, I pray that you would be Lord over our marriages. Lord, there are some that this Monday are just right where they're at. Even in early service, we experienced those people came and just so greatly were moved by your Holy Spirit, God. If we do work deep in their heart. Couples that might need to come. Individuals that need to come. Those that need Christ that need to come today. That you would be glorified as we yield everything to Jesus, who is the author and the glorious finisher of our faith. Lord God, now bring us, help us to come and respond to your word in Jesus' name.

Make Jesus Lord And Respond

SPEAKER_00 52:12

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