Rollohi-chapter5-episode01

-/-- Welcome to SoloBickering, the podcast where I—an aging Kiwi with too many dice and not enough players—explore solo TTRPGs, variant rules, and the occasional philosophical meltdown. Today, we journey into the world of Rollohi: a PG-rated realm of fantasy, where a party of eight attempts to survive the wilds. I hope it becomes a full drama, with discovery, treasure, and arguments I lose with myself. Whether you’re here for the rules, the roleplay, or just the bickering—there’s always something brewing in SoloBickering.

--/-- The party has been recruiting... and it has a plan... not necessarily a good one.

Script: https://larrymannplayssolobickering.blogspot.com/2026/07/rollohi-ch501-script.html

--/--Background sounds attribution: Joel Steudler: www.joelsteudlermusic.com

May 2026, includes a specific warning about mature content.

Intro music acknowledgment: Thanks to ADMFreeMusic: https://pixabay.com/users/admfreemusic-34079374/

April2026 plug for SRPN

https://larrymannplayssolobickering.blogspot.com

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:52

It is the night of the sixteenth day of the first month of spring when a small flotilla approaches the hopefully abandoned buccaneer quarters in the north of the lake. By its position towards the western horizon, the full moon indicates that they are on the last watch before dawn, a time when sentries will be asleep or at least lollygagging at their post, and where subtle scouts can creep in safely. At least that's how the young scout Lem Orvath is thinking. He and his brother have managed to wangle themselves a position in the forward boat, which is under the command of the experienced adventurers Kylie the Elf and Jack the Thief. Lem's brother Seni is the more accomplished of the pair. Several years older, much more proficient with a bow. Lem has had to settle for being signed on his humble light foot. Lem watches his brother Seni fidget, but that's his habit. He'll be settled if it comes the time for action. The other three retainers in the boat are the mysterious and aloof elf, Elion, Mesk Orlatan, who is beginning to be seen as a lieutenant amongst the Lightfoot, and the sunkissed Kiln Orsavan, a sturdy archer. The little vessel, one of the captured and repurposed keelboats, pushes its way through the broad gap in the reeds where the buccaneers navigated the captured ferry boat. This should take them directly into the camp. But then, an interruption. Both Elion and Kylie hold up a hand for silence, and a low-throated grunting and truffling noise can be heard across the silent waters. Perhaps two hundred yards to the north. After a couple of minutes delay, the boat is pulled very cautiously forward, and then a mighty fanged snozzle forces its way above the surface of the water, and a pair of piggy eyes glares at the little boat. The wild boar is somewhat distracted as it has a juicy, rotting corpse in its jaws. It's been diving for dead buccaneers. But with an enraged squeal, it alerts the rest of the sound of and several wild boar begin swimming toward the boat. Jack protests and the poles are clumsily used to backwater as fast as possible. Jack and Kylie, and then Elion and Kilm stand to their feet and ply their bows. Arrows thud into the lead bore and it sinks. A couple more arrows sent towards the further bore as they swim angrily out. And they get the idea and back off. Lem's heart has been absolutely pounding in his ribcage. But he sees his brother is still calm, still plying the sweep. And that gives him heart. It's not the kind of encounter that Vards will sing in long memory, but as a first action, it passes muster. It's something to laugh and talk about over the campfire. As with the Boars now retreated, the entire retinue of the adventurers and their twenty retainers occupy the low earthwork fortress and take it over to ready for the next stage on their intended campaign. It has taken a lot of debate and a couple of vetoes from Erin and Xantu, who, as the front line, have the right to say that they will not expose themselves to ludicrous plans that would mean their sacrifice or the sacrifice of their mounts. Ensure that the north road communicating between Lake Town and the general New Jay area and the county to points north are still in communication. And then subtly strike southeast, perhaps making a base at the ruined Baron's Tower, and then pretend to approach New Jay from the southeast in order to draw out whichever mysterious interdiction force has been making life very difficult for the inhabitants of New Jay. At some stage during the proceedings, Kylie and Jack will also attempt to communicate back to hidden springs, partly to make sure that their friends and erstwhile employer are still alive, partly to check that communications with the West from that front have not been completely broken. That will be a stealth mission, and so they're watching the five that they've chosen for the immediate purpose of scouting to see if they're any good for it. That spring day is put to good use, repurposing the camp and re-fortifying it here and there, getting rest and watches, and having a brief scout around to get the lie of the land. The adventurers came near here and they have a fair idea of what lies immediately north, but they're not altogether sure. Over those hours, nothing of any particular interest occurs. The adventurers get a slightly better idea of how far away the main road might lie, but their original plan to head east from here still holds good by day's end. Night passes with but one small alarm, where the lookout on the boat side sees the keelboats shift and wriggle ominously as some mighty lakefish shifts under them. But no one is occupying the boats. That's good intelligence and Ingall elects to have the keelboats drawn far up onto the land, which is why that side of the fortification was open to be sure. With those stacked upside down and weatherproofing the contents such as rope and sailcloth, the adventurers can set forth on the next stage with a good heart, knowing that their belongings will be as safe as possible. As far as Erin is concerned, the key part of the endeavour, getting all of the mounts onto dry land, has been a great success, and she's content to let the others decide who will be the guardian force left here at the fortification, and which of them will go with her. Xantu is far more hands-on. He tilted the scales in favour of hiring the lone dwarf that applied, a wanderer by the name of Dorgan Kralmouth, and that's the fellow he certainly wants with him at the front. He's the lone heavy foot. For much the same reason, Seed and Pod want the lone halfling, Heloo Orsath, to go with them. The fellow knows the local halflings, knows of it where at least one hidden community can be found, and that could be important. That causes a slightly later start to the next day than Engel had hoped, but it doesn't interrupt too many things. Shifts have to be made to make sure that everyone has breakfast cooked and horses baited properly. The adventurers say a friendly farewell to the ferryman, who are now bound back for Lake Town. A few basic signals have been agreed, should they need to summon the ferry around the lake. The town council had not been particularly open-pocketed when it came to the matter of the keelboats, insisting that the adventurers pay full price for them. But the ferryman themselves leaned over backwards to be sure that their own services were available to the party, and have brought the entire company to the north of the lake with the mounts, basically free of charge. Having watched the retainers for a couple of days now, it's a fairly easy decision as to who to leave behind here at the fortification as a rearguard. And his second in command will be Jellu Varnath, a tidy-minded crossbowman. He and two other crossbows will be the main defense force, while the five light infantry will have the duty of strengthening the fortification where they can. One in particular, Vanu, is a ditch digger by trade. And he and Ofi, another ditch digger, can easily turn their hand to, at the very least, digging much better ditches. Ones that can't be simply nipped over in a single bound by armoured foot such as Eren. That leaves the adventuring party with twelve retainers. Kylie feels fairly confident that with intelligent use of haste, Eren, Eren's mount, and the entire company of adventurers and retainers can be enabled by her great new spell. They leave behind them not just the eight-person rearguard, but their ponies that belong to Seed and Pod. Now that this company is largely foot, Seed and Pod have decided to stay afoot so that they can slip from cover to cover as part of the screening force. If need be, they can easily be hauled atop a more solid mound, such as Eren's palfrey, should the need come to retreat rapidly. This being spring, it's no surprise that the weather is slightly poorer than the previous day. It's a drizzling rain, obscuring some visibility. A rather slow and sometimes halting morning's march, where the order is changed here and there, and small adjustments made to flank guards and rearguard moves the company to the main road, out of what is almost a separate little wilderness north of the lake, and into the more settled lands that they know of from their journey from Horseshoe to the Lake Ferry. As they reach the outskirts of what they vaguely recall to be a very small village, or possibly no more than a hamlet, they hear cries of distress and the sound of cattle in agony. The archers shake out, the three halflings scatter into low cover, and Erin transfers from her palfrey to her war horse. But despite Eren's best efforts standing up in the stirrups, the drifting rain baffles her line of vision, and she can only guess that something on the near side of the village is being attacked. And Gil has been explaining things to the three halflings and Jack and with a wave of his hand, Jack reassures Erin. Don't worry, old sport, we'll be back in a trifle. We'll just see what's what? Meanwhile, Xantu is saying something. Erin's strange to hear him. He's speaking mainly to Umber. Moving off the road, yes, ditch, right? Okay, yes. She understands. With a touch of her knees, Erin guides the mighty war horse off the trail and into a more useful looking paddock. It has a ditch facing the village and a good fence on the paddock side of it. If something were to come charging at their company, that would be a decent sized obstacle. In the well-known military formation common to recruits known as Ashambles, the company struggles after Eren and begins with some encouragement from Santu to line up at the fence. And while they're doing that, we shall move over to the viewpoint of Jack, Seed, and Pod with the retainer Hilo. To see how the scouts get on.

SPEAKER_00 18:52

Come on, Hilo, what you waiting for? This is loot! Enemies, loot!

SPEAKER_01 18:58

Seed encourages, but Hilo is definitely dragging his furry toes.

SPEAKER_00 19:03

We don't know he quivers. When I signed on 'twas as a scout. Yes, come on. We don't know about this.

SPEAKER_01 19:18

Seed's preference for the extra has run into a loyalty difficulty. Heloo is loyal to himself, though a decent sort of fellow. And the idea of going up against what appears to be giants with his little bow and his little leather garments to protect his tummy and not appealing to him. Seed's going to make a charisma charisma check. She rolls a fifteen. He rolls a two. He digs his toes up.

SPEAKER_00 20:09

I don't think so, bitches. He's already beginning to fade into the hit rolls.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

With a contemptuous shrug, C gestures to Podj.

SPEAKER_00 20:21

Finish the job! Skip! Whatever else we need.

SPEAKER_01 20:26

She hits with a treasure-hunting gleam in her eye. Put butters under his breath. Also bigger than Big Fox. But then Jack has faded out of view and is healthy. The three scouts creep close to the paddock. Two cows are down, and by the look of it. More than one villager. Three gigantic humanoids appear in clumps. Are clumsily chasing the remaining three cows around the paddock. Apparently trying to herd them back towards the village, or possibly just for sport. Either way, if they have noticed the approaching company, they don't care.