Supernatural 3x8 + 3x9 (“A Very Supernatural Christmas” + “Malleus Maleficarum”) Rewatch - BAOTD

Welcome back to your favorite Supernatural rewatch podcast, Be Afraid of the Dark! This week we have a discussion about episodes eight and nine of season three of Supernatural. Keep your teeth inside your mouth, okay? Buckle up, grab your rock salt, and remember…you know what’s out there. Be afraid of the dark 👻

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Transcript

Intro

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Hello and welcome back to the show. As always, I'm your driver Spencer, sitting shotgun, is Breck, and this week with a podcast asking the important questions. Like, are Christmas specials really fun? Do Sam and Dean get thrown around all the time by everyone? And are some supernatural titles harder to pronounce than others? This is Be Afraid of the Dark.

SPEAKER_00 0:24

Malleus Malificarum fucking him up.

SPEAKER_02 0:27

I can't say it. I don't know what it is. I don't know why I can't say it. I just can't say it.

SPEAKER_00 0:32

You can wait. Breck, you have to say it on the podcast. It's the episode's called Malleus Malificarum. You'll hear me say it again.

SPEAKER_02 0:38

We're not even talking about it yet. Alright.

"A Very Supernatural Christmas" Discussion

SPEAKER_02 0:40

Jumping straight in to season three, episode eight, a very supernatural Christmas, written by Jeremy Carver, directed by Jay Miller-Tobin, I believe a first time for at least Jay Miller-Tobin.

SPEAKER_00 0:53

I feel like Jeremy Carver, I've heard his name.

SPEAKER_02 0:55

I feel like I've heard his name before too. Uh you really love this episode.

SPEAKER_00 0:59

I just have always had a soft spot for this episode. I love Christmas specials. Yeah. I love any holiday special of a TV show ever. It's something we've lost in the streaming era.

SPEAKER_02 1:09

That is true.

SPEAKER_00 1:10

And I I miss it. I miss it badly. I used to watch this episode every Christmas time.

SPEAKER_02 1:14

I do love a Christmas special. I do think it is something we have lost. This is a weird one. It's a weird episode. And I I think it is the beginning of a weird shift for supernatural. And what I'm gonna say is gonna sound insane, but the Christmas special nature of this, starting the episode with the spinning graphic saying special presentation, begins the shift of Supernatural being much more aware of the fact that it's a TV show. You know, uh seasons one and two are very much we're telling a story, and this is when they start getting a little bit of that um this is a television show, and we're gonna play with the medium. Don't think that's a bad thing, it's just a weird thing. It definitely is a mark of a much more uh of the meta-narrative uh coming into play. So there you go.

SPEAKER_00 2:02

Interesting. It's my thoughts. Hadn't even thought about it that way.

SPEAKER_02 2:04

It's my feelings.

SPEAKER_00 2:04

I was just giggling because I was like, what is this? And I realized it was I was like, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02 2:08

It's got a weird tone, got a weird pace, but we're gonna go ahead and get into it. So as I said, starts with that special presentation thing. Um, and then uh uh starting our episode off in our cold open is just a little boy opening the door for his grandpa.

SPEAKER_00 2:21

And why are the adults not here?

SPEAKER_02 2:22

Why well you don't want to you didn't want to pay those two actors. Um good point.

SPEAKER_00 2:25

I just had the full thought. I was like, can you imagine your like dads coming into town? You're like, hey honey, I know you're a latchkey kid. Can you just let your grandpa in when he comes home?

SPEAKER_02 2:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:32

It's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 2:33

Yeah. Uh so yeah, he does. He lets the grandpa in, asks him if he got him any presents. The grandpa's like, Oh, I thought Santa was supposed to do that. Cut to later in the night, the grandpa is putting on a Santa outfit. It's very sweet, it's very cute, and he rings a little bell and starts fake putting presents out. The kid comes down, watches from the banister as uh his grandpa, fake Santa, starts putting gifts out, and then they hear things on the roof. Then they hear things coming down the chimney, and we see you know some soot falling. He goes over to the chimney and the whatever, the thing is knocked down, and hands reach down and snatch him up the chimney and force his body up. Crunch, crunch, crunch. A boot falls, a bloody boot falls. Bloody Santa boot. And the kid is and screams, and it's important to say this is one year earlier. So this is a flashback. Yes. I think that is a fascinating decision because we cut to our title card and we cut straight into a different victim. Yes. And Sam and Dean are there.

SPEAKER_00 3:28

Hold on a minute.

SPEAKER_02 3:29

Couldn't it have just been that guy?

SPEAKER_00 3:31

Who's to say? I thought that was very they have to they is they m I'll make you understand why they did that later in the episode, but you're like, oh, are you Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02 3:39

How do they make you understand?

SPEAKER_00 3:41

Because later they're like, oh, this couple was living in Seattle last year.

SPEAKER_02 3:44

Oh, okay, yeah. That's part of the mystery. Yeah. That makes more sense. I don't pay attention. Um anyway, Sam.

SPEAKER_00 3:52

This is making me laugh. Like, yeah, honey, they said in the episode that they're like, they were in Seattle last year, and they just moved here in January and they were the same kind of disappearances.

SPEAKER_02 3:59

And sometimes you gotta take notes.

SPEAKER_00 4:01

He was bothered by the teeth happening, so yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:03

Well, that was after.

SPEAKER_00 4:04

No, they were remember? They're about to yank DJs.

SPEAKER_02 4:07

Oh, yeah, I was bothered by the teeth. See, shoes.

SPEAKER_00 4:09

You're you're really about to see the dichotomy that I'm upset by fingernails and Spencer's upset by teeth.

SPEAKER_02 4:13

Yeah, I don't love fingernails either, but teeth. Eyes are the worst. Um, I know this. Uh so anyway, they're talking to this lady, and she kind of asks, she says, My husband's he's they said he might have been kidnapped, so why haven't we got a ransom? Like, we don't know. Um so they move on with their day. They they uh and uh it's important to note they see a wreath. There's a wreath in one of the shots with a very specific wreath. It's part of the mystery. We'll come back to her. So they're in the the motel room, and Dean comes back, and Sam is looking at a bunch of pictures of like Krampus and Evil Santa.

SPEAKER_00 4:46

Bell Schnickel, which it will only ever make me think of the office.

SPEAKER_02 4:49

Yeah, so they start discussing this, and uh Dean is like, You're crazy, maybe not so crazy, and Sam gets off just a wonderful line, which that's what the lore says.

SPEAKER_00 4:59

That's what the Oh, I wrote down that's what the lore says too, because that's this is as we all know, our favorite joke about Sam is with the lore, check this, so check this. The lore says it's so Sam.

SPEAKER_02 5:09

It's so Sam.

SPEAKER_00 5:10

Also, I wanted to ask you, did you ever have a family member that would try to pretend to be Santa for you? Me either.

SPEAKER_02 5:15

Not a thing. I don't think that's a real thing.

SPEAKER_00 5:16

You don't think it's a real thing?

SPEAKER_02 5:17

I don't think it's a real thing.

SPEAKER_00 5:18

You don't think like mommy saw Santa I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus is like a real thing that's happened to children across this country?

SPEAKER_02 5:23

Okay, well, maybe, but it doesn't feel like a real thing because I've never known anyone who's had that happen.

SPEAKER_00 5:27

You know, I was an adult when I realized that that kid was just yeah, that Santa's like his dad dressed up as Santa. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It took me a very long time. I fully thought that was a song that was just condoning your mom cheating on your dad with Santa Claus.

SPEAKER_02 5:38

No, it's the dad dressed up as Santa Claus.

SPEAKER_00 5:39

Well, wouldn't it be more fun if Santa Claus got his rocks off?

SPEAKER_02 5:42

I mean, sure.

SPEAKER_00 5:44

Who's to say?

SPEAKER_02 5:45

I guess. Um anyway, so they they decide to go and f Dean has an idea of where to go look. So they go to this Santa's village, and it's very sad, and there's no snow. There's no snow. It's kind of creepy and weird in true supernatural fashion.

SPEAKER_00 6:00

Shout out to winter this year of no snow.

SPEAKER_02 6:02

Yeah, shout out to winter being a very weird winter.

SPEAKER_00 6:05

Um Dean wants Christmas.

SPEAKER_02 6:08

Dean wants Christmas. They're walking around and Dean is saying, Why don't we do Christmas? We'll get a tree, you know, we'll eggnog, whatever. And Sam is not having that.

SPEAKER_00 6:17

Sam is not into it.

SPEAKER_02 6:18

Oh, uh the reason is Dean figured out that both victims went to this village.

SPEAKER_00 6:21

Yes, they they everyone went to this village, it's a whole thing. You know how you you know how everyone goes to the creepy Santa village. Um Dean also name drops Boston Market. Miss her. Miss that bad. Miss that bad. There was one right by my high school. Miss that. Yeah. So bad.

SPEAKER_02 6:37

So Dean walks off, calls Sam a Grinch for not wanting to do Christmas, and um Sam looks down at this reindeer and it's staring up at him. We kind of zoom in, it's weird. And we cut, and this is a flashback episode. Uh we cut to Baby Sam and Baby Dean, where they're off to be in a motel room while John is away. Yes. It's I believe they said Christmas time. At Christmas time.

SPEAKER_00 6:58

They said 1991. So my math says they're so Sam is the 432 and seven. Yes, of course, of course, of course. No, Sam's nine, and so that makes Dean like 13, 14.

SPEAKER_02 7:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:12

So too young for this shit. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:14

I'll kill you, John Manchester. Sam is wrapping a present that we don't see. He said he got it from Uncle Bobby for his dad, and it's very special. Cute. Uh, and Dean is makes fun of him a little bit, and then they get in an argument because we reveal here that Sam at this age does not know about monsters. He does not know about what's really out there. He thinks his dad's like a salesman or something like that. Dean's like, he'll be back. He's on he's on business, he's on sales. And uh Sam, baby Sam brings himself that why we never talk about mom, and Dean screams at him and storms out. Yeah, which Dean, the last time we had a flashback episode, you also left and it got you in trouble. Did you not learn? No. He didn't learn.

SPEAKER_00 7:48

He didn't learn. Anyway. These are my favorite of the kid actors they get for the flashbacks. Are these two specifically? I think this young Sam comes back in season four, as if for the high school episode.

SPEAKER_02 7:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:59

Um, I believe. But these these two are some of my favorites. I think this um Dean was the Dean a couple seasons ago, too. A kid Dean. Anyways, you get once you have enough of them, you're like, oh hey, I like that one. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:11

Uh they we cut back to present-day Sam, Dean walks up, they keep investigating, and they stumble upon a very creepy Santa. Uh he's like chuckling weirdly and very clear. He's like stereotyped drunk Santa at the village.

SPEAKER_00 8:23

So weird, creepy drunk Santa.

SPEAKER_02 8:25

But they they bring up uh the the lore says uh he will walk the the whatever this evil version of Santa's will walk with a limp and smell of sweets.

SPEAKER_00 8:35

And Dean goes, so he's a pimp, Santa?

SPEAKER_02 8:37

I mean, yeah. But anyway, this lady comes up and she says, Would you like me to escort your kids up to see Santa? And Dean goes, No, but it's always been uh my my brother's dream here. And she looks at him and he goes, No, he's kidding. We're just here to watch, which is not great.

SPEAKER_00 8:51

Not great. She's like, Ew. The other funny thing is she stares up at Sam and goes, sorry, no kids over 12.

SPEAKER_02 8:57

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Looking at like ginormous Jared Padelecki. This is so funny. It's a good bit. Anyway, uh the Santa takes a break, he walks past them with a limp and he smells of sweets. So they're thinking, That's that's our guy.

SPEAKER_00 9:09

Like, all right, I guess we'll do it. The concept of an evil Santa pretending to be an evil Santa.

SPEAKER_02 9:14

Great, fantastic. He's just bad at the undercover part of the job. Yeah, you just gotta do a couple of things. He lied on the resume.

SPEAKER_00 9:18

It'd be really funny.

SPEAKER_02 9:19

Anyway, so there's they have a long stakeout outside his like trailer, and there's no caffeine and even less sharing of emotions because Dean starts Dean tries to interrogate the why don't you want to have Christmas?

SPEAKER_00 9:30

Sam, why are you the boy who hates Christmas?

SPEAKER_02 9:32

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's funny, and Sam kind of dismisses it. We don't get too much into it here.

SPEAKER_00 9:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:38

Uh, and they what makes him they spot some movement in the window.

SPEAKER_00 9:42

They spot they spot him in the window. I love that he's wearing his wife pleaser and his boxers and his um Santa hat. Like I love the concept of he's like, I have to stay a character.

SPEAKER_02 9:50

Yeah, yeah. I will I will let you speak on this because you you you find it very amusing.

SPEAKER_00 9:54

This is one of my favorite, this is an underrated scene to me because it does just make me giggle. Um also so he's like staring out the window like shadily, shuts the blinds, and Dean goes, Hey, what's up with Saint Nicotine here?

SPEAKER_02 10:05

Yeah, yeah, great. Hilarious. Great line, great line.

SPEAKER_00 10:07

Um, and he's not a loser. He's not evil. Or he is a loser, he's not evil, he's just a loser, he's a bum. And they break in and we see a bong for a little bit. I know you could show a bong in this.

SPEAKER_02 10:17

Learning a lot about what you can show on network television.

SPEAKER_00 10:19

We are, but that it's like it's only in like half a shot. Like it's really not like, but like it's just him watching porn and getting high. And they break in and the guy's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, and they start to cover it, and Sam just or Dean just starts singing Silent Night. And I love that the subtitles say Dean singing Silent Night badly.

SPEAKER_02 10:37

Yeah, and then Sam joins in.

SPEAKER_00 10:39

And they don't know the words, like they keep going round and round the table, like and then the Santa's like joining in.

SPEAKER_02 10:46

Joins in, he slumps back, and then Sam pulls him out and they they rush away. Yeah. Uh we cut to our next kill sequence.

SPEAKER_01 10:52

Uh oh.

SPEAKER_02 10:53

And in a really good one, too. Uh, it's a kid cut uh he the you know, we hear the same sounds we heard before on the roof, and this kid starts coming down, he's looking around for Santa, and then the Santa, you're early. Yeah, the fire guard like knocks down and soot falls, and then boots show up or whatever it is exactly. He the kid backs away. This like creepy, like Santa leather Santa suit covered in blood, which is goes so fucking hard. It's so cool.

SPEAKER_00 11:21

Christmas whore, we love you.

SPEAKER_02 11:22

Yeah, like the the the white on the boots is all covered in blood and matted down. It's really cool. It's a really and they shoot it.

SPEAKER_00 11:29

We should do that this Christmas.

SPEAKER_02 11:30

I'm super into it.

SPEAKER_00 11:31

Yeah, it's March, but we should do that. What's playing in those couple months? I'm into it, yeah. Really elaborate evil Christmas costume.

SPEAKER_02 11:38

I love it. Cool. Um, the he kind of walks past the kid ignoring him and stomps up the stairs and walks into this room, and we hear a scream and a slap, and then we don't know everything goes silent, and then we hear dragging. And the lighting here is really cool because it's like this beam of light with all this like fog. So, like the beam of light kind of like anyway, it's cool. It's a good shot. Uh, kind of reminds me of like a very small scale exorcist, right?

SPEAKER_00 12:03

I was literally about to say it reminds me of the exorcist a little bit.

SPEAKER_02 12:05

Very small scale, very contained version of that very famous shot from the exorcist.

SPEAKER_00 12:08

Because they used to care about how this show was lit.

SPEAKER_02 12:10

I want to say the stunt double in this scene is putting in the work.

SPEAKER_00 12:13

Oh my god, yes.

SPEAKER_02 12:14

The Santa, the evil Santa drags out a sack, like a big leather sack, and there's a guy thrashing around inside of it, which just I mean, you just have to have a dude in a sack getting dragged down the stairs, thrashing about.

SPEAKER_00 12:26

It's kind of a fun gag. Yeah, it's kind of a fun day at work. Hey, you're gonna be the guy who's getting abducted by evil Santa today. So can you just climb in the red leather sag that's supposed to look like Santa's present sack? Yeah. Thanks, bud. Um, yeah, Crafty has sandwiches over there if you just want to. Yeah. Great day at the office.

SPEAKER_02 12:40

So they the the Santa like hits it and it gets knocked, the guy on the sack gets knocked out, the father of this family gets knocked out. And the kid's looking there and he's terrified, and the Santa stomps over and reaches behind him and grabs a cookie.

SPEAKER_00 12:52

So funny. Also, what's with these people having the cookies out like for the days before Christmas? What's up with that?

SPEAKER_02 12:58

Oh, I should also note that in the beginning, when Sam comes walking out of the house, he found a tooth in the chimney.

SPEAKER_00 13:03

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 13:04

So it's very that's what kind of led him to the Santa thing. Yeah, sorry, I forgot to say that.

SPEAKER_00 13:08

You were just really scared about talking about teeth. It's okay.

SPEAKER_02 13:11

Well, I don't mind that tooth. I was only watching it.

SPEAKER_00 13:13

I know.

SPEAKER_02 13:14

Uh anyway, so this guy gets snitchy snatched. Um we cut to Sam and Dean talking to the mom, who has a big black eye, explaining that you know, that's what that's what your son saw, and she says, That's what he said. And they asked, Did you see him? And she's like, No, it was dark, and he hit me.

SPEAKER_00 13:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 13:29

And my husband, whatever, my husband's gone.

SPEAKER_00 13:31

Again, this poor lady traumatized as fuck before Christmas. She's never enjoying Christmas again.

SPEAKER_02 13:35

No, never again. And Sam asks about the wreath on her wall because he sees an identical wreath.

SPEAKER_00 13:41

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_02 13:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:42

And Dean gives him this look. This lady's like, What the fuck are you asking me about my wreath for? Like, clearly, and then they leave, and Dean makes, of course, a veiled gay joke about Sam. Um, but Sam has noticed that this wreath has a meadow suite. And I wrote this down. So it is the most powerful plant in pagan lore. I wrote lore with no e, congrats, um, for human sacrifice. Yeah. So this is now we're like, we're getting into we have kind of two pagan episodes in a row, actually. This one and the next one, which is fun. Um I love when they get into cool pagan lore. And I also love here that Sam fucking lays down the law of how much modern Christmas is stolen from pagan tradition. He's like, down to the things we do and we eat. He's like, Jesus was actually probably born in the fall. We just is he's like Christians just took the winter solstice and all these other traditions around it. Um, which I think is really fun because it's true. It's true.

SPEAKER_02 14:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:31

Christmas tree, baby. That's a Eulog.

SPEAKER_02 14:33

Good stuff.

SPEAKER_00 14:34

Love it. Yeah. Um sorry, I was actually gonna say. So we're dealing with holding a car, god of the winter solstice.

SPEAKER_02 14:42

Yeah, and what is that winter what what do his sacrifices bring?

SPEAKER_00 14:46

Mild weather. Did they mention they're in Michigan?

SPEAKER_02 14:48

Hence the no snow in the middle of December in Michigan. Uh so they're realizing, okay, we need to start looking into whoever this is. We need to figure it out where they got the reads. So they start going and looking, and they come into this shop, and there's this old guy, and they ask of the reason there's more like thinly veiled gay jokes about Sam wanting the wreaths. Um, and the guy says, Oh, this old local lady uh just gave them to me for free. And they're like, Did you sell them for? He's like, Hell no, it's Christmas time.

SPEAKER_00 15:17

Are you kidding me? No.

SPEAKER_02 15:19

Do you know how much people pay for this crap?

SPEAKER_00 15:21

And Dean's like, That's wonderful.

SPEAKER_02 15:22

So the the Kerrigan, this Mrs. Kerrigan gave the wreaths to this man for free, so they go a knock in.

SPEAKER_00 15:29

And I think they specifically say to the Meadow Suite is basically like a neon sign that says, Come eat me if it's hanging at your house. So there's that.

SPEAKER_02 15:38

Yeah. Uh there is another little scene uh kind of where Dean reiterates he's like, This is my last Christmas, but it would be nice to actually have one. You know, because Sam's like, Why are you asking about Christmas so much? We haven't had it, or you haven't talked about it in years. Um then we cut to another flashback sequence, and baby Sam stole John's journal, is what we come to because Dean comes in, brings him dinner, brings him dinner, which is like funy's.

SPEAKER_00 16:04

It's like vending machine food, it's really sad.

SPEAKER_02 16:06

And uh he walks over to his bed and he sits down and knocks all the crap off his own bed. And and Sam goes, I know, I know where dad really is. And he pulls out John's journal from under his mattress, and Dean was like, Dad will be so many. He's like, I read it, I know what happened to mom.

SPEAKER_00 16:19

And I know why there's a gun under your pillow.

SPEAKER_02 16:21

Yeah, and he sees Dean, kid Dean has a revolver under his pillow.

SPEAKER_00 16:25

I'll kill you, John.

SPEAKER_02 16:26

And Dean essentially, I'll kill you if you tell dad that I told you this. And he just starts explaining. He's like, Our dad's a superhero, he fights monsters. And Sam's like, well, those monsters could get me. And you know, the monsters he told me the monsters under my bed were fake, and Dean just goes, Well, that's because he checked first. And you're like, ah. Damn.

SPEAKER_00 16:44

When I told dad I was scared of the thing in my closet, he gave me a 45.

SPEAKER_02 16:47

Yeah. Sad stuff, man.

SPEAKER_00 16:49

Sad stuff. Name of the podcast. Name of the podcast.

SPEAKER_02 16:52

Bummer. So there's there's you know that kind of going on, and he tells him he's like, baby Sam kind of lays down to go to sleep. He's like, it'll you'll feel better in the morning, and dad will show up, he always does. Uh so baby Sam's like crying himself to sleep.

SPEAKER_00 17:05

It's very, like, we need to kill John Winchester again.

SPEAKER_02 17:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:09

Again.

SPEAKER_02 17:09

Again, maybe two more times. It wasn't enough. Maybe two more times.

SPEAKER_00 17:12

I would like that. I would like to see it.

SPEAKER_02 17:14

So, anyway, they get back to the present time, they roll up on this house that's like covered in Christmas decorations. It's gorgeous. Idyllic Christmas time hype. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:22

I write down later that this is exactly what your grandparents' house felt like at Christmas when you were a kid. Yeah. Like it's this warm, magical place where you're like, oh.

SPEAKER_02 17:29

Yeah. So uh there's a sign above the door that says the Kerrigan's. And Dean makes a joke. He's like, This seems real pagan to me. They knock on the door, this like sweet old lady uh opens the door, jolly as can be, like, oh, hello. Like, oh yeah, whatever. Um, they ask about the reads. She she kind of says some stuff twice, you know.

SPEAKER_00 17:49

Uh oh fudge, I'm all out. They smelled so good.

SPEAKER_02 17:52

Yeah, and they says that she's not Irish.

SPEAKER_00 17:55

I was trying to do Wisconsin.

SPEAKER_02 17:56

You an Irish, you and an Irish bro.

SPEAKER_00 17:58

Sorry, we believe in equality.

SPEAKER_02 18:00

In equality. Um, anyway, so the husband walks in and offers some peanut brittle.

SPEAKER_00 18:07

And Dean Reeves are fine, fine reads.

SPEAKER_02 18:09

Fine reads. Dean goes to take it and he swats his handle. Yeah, these two are like cosplaying Americana, like 1950s Americana.

SPEAKER_00 18:16

Very much a Norman Rockwell painting.

SPEAKER_02 18:17

Yes, yeah. Really funny, really good stuff. They go away and they're immediately like, we gotta go in and break. They're like, Dean's kind of like, what do you think? They have them in the basement.

SPEAKER_00 18:29

Oh, and because Sam specifically says, Did you see all that stuff they have in there? That wasn't just regular Christmas greenery. They had serious, like pagan herbs in there.

SPEAKER_02 18:37

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:38

Um and that's why you study the lore, motherfucker.

SPEAKER_02 18:41

Yeah, and so they at some point during all of this, they've also called Bobby and he's called them idiots.

SPEAKER_00 18:46

Yeah, he's like, You fucking idiot, it's pagan. Look it up.

SPEAKER_02 18:49

Yeah, which is really funny.

SPEAKER_00 18:50

The concept of be of the chew out from Bobby being so bad they don't show it because they're like, Are you dumb?

SPEAKER_02 18:57

Sometimes you can't justifiably not have an F-bomb.

SPEAKER_00 19:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:00

Uh anyway, so we hard cut to Dean sharpening a steak. And I want to note there's a trash can under where he's sharpening the steak. None of none of the shavings are getting, they're all over the floor. Why did you bother even having the trash can?

SPEAKER_00 19:16

It's so perfectly Dean.

SPEAKER_02 19:17

It made me look because he's just like, it made me laugh really hard. Anyway, so he's like, You sure these evergreen steaks will kill them?

SPEAKER_00 19:24

Specifically in evergreen trees.

SPEAKER_02 19:26

Bobby was sure, and he's like, Bobby was sure. So they go to break in. We get some of my favorite stuff, which is the Winchester's breaking and entering. They pick some locks, they go in. Dean had made a joke about plastic over the the uh the couch, and there's literally plastic over the couch.

SPEAKER_00 19:39

Did you ever have a relative that kept plastic on their couch like that? Me neither. Actually, maybe I did. No, I don't think so.

SPEAKER_02 19:45

I think it's silly. You're gonna live your entire life uncomfortable on a plastic couch just to like make it last a little longer.

SPEAKER_00 19:51

I'm like you're doing this so that when people come over once a month, you're taking the plastic off. It's weird. It's weird.

SPEAKER_02 19:56

Yeah, it's also ugly. I think it's fake. Is this fake? No, it's a real thing. Anyway, uh they break and enter, they're walking around in the kitchen, they find a locked door to the cellar. They break in, they go downstairs, chains, bloody bones, it is a gorient basically. The sacks, the sacks of the people are hanging, and and Sam goes over and touches one of them. Yeah, because he gets choked. Sam touched one and it starts flailing around again, and he turns and the old lady grabs him by the throat and lifts him off his feet. Awesome.

SPEAKER_00 20:24

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 20:24

Old I I literally wrote old lady strong as hell. He loves it.

SPEAKER_00 20:28

The back kind of reminded me of um that scene in audition.

SPEAKER_02 20:31

Yeah, no, I had that same thought. Yeah, if you've seen audition, you know we won't say more.

SPEAKER_00 20:36

Yeah, I don't want to say more. Yeah. I literally just wrote down creepy basement full of gore. Creepy basement full of gore.

SPEAKER_02 20:42

And isn't that why we're here? Um anyway, so the the the husband walks over and Mr. Kerrigan walks over and not throws Dean into a wall, knocks him out pretty much immediately. Um walks up to Sam and she's like and he walks up too and and and yeah, go ahead.

SPEAKER_00 20:57

She's like, Oh, I wish you boys hadn't come down here. And his flashlight flashes flashes across their faces.

SPEAKER_02 21:04

And like shows and disappears their true form, which is like milky eyes and kind of weathered faces.

SPEAKER_00 21:09

Yeah, and kind of honestly, I I kind of thought I spotted um the the male one. I f I felt like he had like a bullet hole in it.

SPEAKER_02 21:15

So did I, and I didn't know what that was supposed to be.

SPEAKER_00 21:17

I don't know, but it was fun. I enjoyed it.

SPEAKER_02 21:19

I liked it.

SPEAKER_00 21:19

Dude, I wonder if they can gods possess people? Do we know if they just have a form? I think they just have a form and they just change it.

SPEAKER_02 21:25

Well, yeah, the the pagan, the yeah, the the pagan gods all have just like a form. Anyway. Um, so that's pretty cool. Mm-hmm. Love it. Uh they wake up and they are tied back to back, and and Sam's like, hey, whatever.

SPEAKER_00 21:38

He's like, Merry Christmas Dean.

SPEAKER_02 21:39

Merry Christmas Dean. They walk in, they're like, Oh, we thought you two would be sleeping through all the good parts. And there's some good banter here. It's it's a fun scene. Um, they're b both sides are very snarky in this.

SPEAKER_00 21:51

I love these two actors. I don't know what it is about them, but they're five. They're so jovial for two be they're like, Well, we've been alive a long time, young man.

SPEAKER_02 22:00

Yeah, and they they they talk a lot about how they assimilated into culture, how they used to take hundreds of sacrifices a year, now it's only maybe three, and these like with you two, it's five.

SPEAKER_00 22:10

How about that?

SPEAKER_02 22:11

It's not so bad.

SPEAKER_00 22:12

Like it's really fun. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:14

Also, and again, they're they're uh two monsters cosplaying uh Americana, 1950s Americana. They talk about how they would play bridge and they do all this stuff and assimilate is the word they use, which is is it's cool, it's a cool idea.

SPEAKER_00 22:27

It's cool, and they and they do, in fact, eat people.

SPEAKER_02 22:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:30

Um, and I think it's really fun. I love the shot of when they both turn and they're they're side to side or they're back-to-back um.

SPEAKER_02 22:36

You better start showing us some respect.

SPEAKER_00 22:38

And then Dean goes, or Sam goes, or what? You'll eat. You'll eat, you'll eat us. It's really so funny. I love it.

SPEAKER_02 22:43

Um and then as they're they start doing the ritual bits where they have to like cut their arms and gather their blood. Yeah, uh with a cool, like weird curved knife. They put the uh the what is it called again?

SPEAKER_00 22:54

Uh meadow sweet like wreath around their side.

SPEAKER_02 22:56

Yeah, around their necks and they pull a fingernail from Sam. And they I have done. Yeah, and uh when they've cut Dean, she's Dean calls her like a asshole or really he calls her a bitch. Yeah, he calls her a bitch, and Dean says it a lot in this episode. The next two also. And he's talking two literal monsters. I feel like the line is a little too.

SPEAKER_00 23:17

I know, you know, it's it's Dean. Anyway, it's a pass.

SPEAKER_02 23:20

Regardless, uh he he she's like, you know when I feel like swearing, I just say fudge, and then she hurts him again, and he goes, he goes, You fudging touch me again, and I'll fudging kill you.

SPEAKER_00 23:30

So the people long for Dean Winchester to say fuck.

SPEAKER_02 23:34

The people long for Dean Winchester to say fuck.

SPEAKER_00 23:37

I just want I can't even say that if it was on HBO, the it would be gorier. I just think I would be able to hear Dean swear the way he always swears. Yeah. And we only know with that how he actually swears because of the Ghost Facers episode.

SPEAKER_02 23:47

Yeah, because they can censor it. Because they can censor it. Which I looked up and it is this season. Fuck yeah.

SPEAKER_00 23:51

Gay Love can pierce through the veil of death.

SPEAKER_02 23:53

That is a very low-rated episode, and I remember liking that episode a lot.

SPEAKER_00 23:56

Those people can go fuck themselves.

SPEAKER_02 23:57

Anyway, so then they pull one of Sam's nails and they show it, and it's really violent.

SPEAKER_00 24:01

And it was gross, and I hated it.

SPEAKER_02 24:03

Yeah, so then they are about to rip one of Dean's teeth out, and there's a knock on the door, and he goes, You should probably get the door with his like pliers in his mouth.

SPEAKER_01 24:12

You should get the door.

SPEAKER_02 24:13

They go off to get the the the um the door, and it's a lady giving them a fruitcake, and she's all Christmas spirit hoorah kind of bridge next door, yeah. And they're like, Yo, you'll betcha. Um, oh you'll betcha, dear.

SPEAKER_00 24:26

Why are you better at it than me?

SPEAKER_02 24:27

Because I just make silly voices all day long.

SPEAKER_00 24:29

That's true.

SPEAKER_02 24:30

Anyway, they turn around, they drop the fruitcake she's given them. He steps on it, they walk into the kitchen, and the Winchesters have, in true classic Winchester fashion, escape. Yes. They're um on the roof. So then the door to the two doors to the kitchen both shut. They start banging on them and they're holding him. Dean pulls a drawer out to block it, and he goes around to help Sam. They pull this like armoire over and block the door, and they start looking for the their stuff's in the cellar, but the only way to the cellar is through the kitchen. So they see the Christmas tree, knock it over, they start ripping branches off, and uh they the the Kerrigan's come in and they kind of throw Dean to the side, and Dean's getting fucking wailed on.

SPEAKER_00 25:06

He literally is.

SPEAKER_02 25:07

And Mrs. Kerrigan does this like face like thing, and it's fun. It's it's silly, but it's fun. It's fun enough.

SPEAKER_00 25:14

You little thing. I loved that tree. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:16

What's with Sam and Old Ladies this episode?

SPEAKER_00 25:18

I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 25:19

Anyway, um, so now I'll just say that she rushes in, Sam stabs her through the chest, he turns around and he goes, uh, Mage or whatever. MAG. MAGE. Weird name. Weird pronunciation. Sorry to all the Madges who listen to this podcast. Anyway, then uh Dean gets the better of him and stabs him through the chest and stabs him again. So they both get the kill. So I I will the the current kill counter is Sam 6, Dean 3. Okay, Sam, you're still up. You're still up, buddy. Good work, everybody. So um we cut away from this. They've they've officially Oh, there's this great shot as they're walking away, they cut down to the branch in his chest, and there's just still an ornament on it, which is silly and fun, and I like it.

SPEAKER_00 25:59

I also think that no one takes big heaving breaths like Sam when he finishes.

SPEAKER_02 26:04

He's always like Because he's a giant human being.

SPEAKER_00 26:06

He's almost like, oh my god, chest.

SPEAKER_02 26:08

Um, okay, we cut back to another flashback, and baby Dean is waking up baby Sam, and he's giving him a Christmas. He's like, Look, Dad showed up and he got us, look, we're we're we're getting away with robbery here, you know.

SPEAKER_00 26:19

Um and Sam's like, Well, why didn't he wake me up? He tried, you wouldn't wake up.

SPEAKER_02 26:23

Come up in your presence, and and baby Sam opens up a bunch of presents, clearly for a little girl. It's like a Barbie.

SPEAKER_00 26:29

Sapphire, Barbie, and a sparkly pom-pom ended jumping.

SPEAKER_02 26:32

And Dean lets on, he's like, I I broke into a house down the street and I didn't know they'd be I didn't know they'd be chicks' presents, is what he says. Um and it's really sad, and and you know, their dad didn't show up. And Dean just tried to step up but not take the credit for it. And I really like that. So Sam pulls out the gift he was gonna give to his dad and gives it to uh baby Dean, and Dean opens it and it's the amulet that he always wears. Um and it's really and he and Dean is so clearly so touched by this, and he puts it around his neck. It's really beautiful, very heartfelt scene. He still wears it. And I just like that baby Sam got a Christmas because baby Dean stepped up. And then the next scene is Dean coming home and Sam has decorated the whole motel for Christmas, and he's made eggnog and uh Dean a surprise, and he gives he's like, tell me if you need me to uh spike it a little more, and yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:23

So this is like a funny, this is a thing. So Jensen makes this really funny little like damn face. Um, and that's because Jared actually it was supposed to just be like milk. Like it was supposed to be regular, and then Jared actually did spike it with actual alcohol. Yeah. And so that's Jensen's face because he thought it was gonna be Reggae Mug, and he's like, Oh, Jesus, that's actual eggnog.

SPEAKER_02 27:40

And he sits down and uh Dean hands him some presents wrapped in newspaper, and he's like, What'd you get? These like the quick mart down the road. Yeah. Um, and Sam pulls out some presents and hands them to him. He's like, Great minds think alike. They've done the exact same thing. They open it, and uh Dean got Sam skin mags, is what he calls them. Yeah. Porno mags.

SPEAKER_00 27:58

He gets some porno mags and a can of shaving cream.

SPEAKER_02 28:00

And he's uh he's like, I love him, and and Sam gets Dean uh like a protein bar and a motor oil for the crazy food for me and food for my maids. It's really sweet. They and then they want to say more in the true Winchester fashion, they can't. Yeah. You want to watch a game, so they turn on the game, and we end on this really great shot from outside as we're like pulling back. There's Christmas lights, you can see them through the window, and the impala's there. Really sweet touching ending.

SPEAKER_00 28:24

It's a very Christmas special ending ep of the episode. Like it's a very it's like the shot itself is so Christmas special.

SPEAKER_02 28:30

Supernatural has done send-ups a lot, but this is the first time it feels like they're playing with the idea of being a television show.

SPEAKER_00 28:36

Yeah, agree.

SPEAKER_02 28:37

And they do that more, they do that with Ghost Facers, they do that with Mystery Spot, they do that with a bunch of stuff. So, anyway, um, best line. Or do we do we miss anything? Sorry.

SPEAKER_00 28:45

Um no, I don't think so. Just this has one of been one of my favorite episodes, and every time I rewatch it, I used to post the um Merry Christmas bro GIF every year on Christmas. Yeah. Like, Merry Christmas bro. Just love it. Just love it.

Best of "A Very Supernatural Christmas"

SPEAKER_02 28:57

Uh Best Line.

SPEAKER_00 28:58

Hold on. I want to say it correctly.

SPEAKER_02 29:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:02

What did he say? What does he say? What's up with St. Nicotine?

SPEAKER_02 29:05

Yeah, really good. I I wrote one down. I want to give an honorable mention to you fudging touch me again, I'll fudging kill you. Really good. The one I did put because it's it's so supernatural, is that's what the lore says.

SPEAKER_00 29:17

That's what the lore says.

SPEAKER_02 29:18

Uh, which is really good. Okay, best kill. There's there's a couple good ones in here.

SPEAKER_00 29:21

Um I guess three, but anyway. There's a few, but I said the opener because I think the boot falling is so classic.

SPEAKER_02 29:27

I said the opener, plus the hands coming and just the implied violence with the boot then falling. It's good.

SPEAKER_00 29:31

There's a lot of crunching. Yeah. Liked it. Alright.

SPEAKER_02 29:34

You ready to go?

SPEAKER_00 29:34

Yeah.

"Malleus Maleficarum" Discussion

SPEAKER_02 29:35

Alright, season three, episode nine.

SPEAKER_00 29:37

Malleus Malificarum.

SPEAKER_02 29:39

I can't say it. Uh, written by Ben Edlin, directed by Robert Singer. That's it. We got a gooey episode coming.

SPEAKER_00 29:45

That's how you know it's gooey and full of lore.

SPEAKER_02 29:47

Uh, and yeah, it's a plot episode for sure, for sure. Okay, so we open on this couple coming home and they're about to get their horny on. You love coming home from a party, and uh, she's taking her dress off, and she's like, I need a few minutes. So he goes off and I don't know, does whatever he does. She's brushing her teeth, and then we start hearing incantations, and we cut to these really cool close-up shots of like this woman's lips and this toothbrush with blood dripping on it, candles lighting, true witchy stuff.

SPEAKER_00 30:12

Yeah, we'd love to see witch shit.

SPEAKER_02 30:14

Um, and then the woman starts pulling her teeth out in the bathroom. Oh, okay. And then she starts spitting them out. And I hate teeth.

SPEAKER_00 30:22

If you're only listening to this, you can't see the haunted look in Spencer's eye.

SPEAKER_02 30:26

I don't mind, I don't mind teeth getting punched out. Like if somebody punches you and you spit out tooth, doesn't bother me. But if you if a tooth breaks, if a tooth, if a tooth like gets pulled out, it drives me nuts. It's one of the few pieces of violence that I struggle with.

SPEAKER_00 30:43

Meanwhile, if you even show me anything near an eyeball, I'm like, please stop it right now.

SPEAKER_02 30:47

She hates eyeball stocks. Um don't mention this. Anyway, so uh the husband comes back and he's kicking at the door, and we see the lock slowly turn and it creaks open and she's on the floor dead with blood coming out of her mouth. And this is a scene, one of the teeth like rolls almost down the drain.

SPEAKER_00 31:03

Really gross stuff. So it's always the witch episodes. It's always I remember this from my every other time I've ever watched Supernatural. I'm I'm kind of shocked it took us this long to get a witch episode. Um, but they're always the grossest fucking ones. Yeah. Always. I distinctly remember later there's a season, I think I want to say season eight, somewhere around there, where they have like beating hearts inside of cupcakes.

SPEAKER_02 31:23

Awesome.

SPEAKER_00 31:24

Gross as fuck.

SPEAKER_02 31:24

It's cool as hell.

SPEAKER_00 31:25

Love it. Gross as fuck, though.

SPEAKER_02 31:26

Um, okay, so we cut to just the same as the last one. They're talking Sam, or Dean's talking to a woman.

SPEAKER_00 31:33

They're pretending to be CDC this time. No, he's they're talking to the um the husband, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 31:37

They're talking to the husband, and he's explaining what happened, exactly what happened. And Sam is looking around in the bathroom and he opens up the sink and he looks under it and he sees a little leather bag, a hex bag, our first hex bag. Uh as they're leaving, Dean's like, that guy's and the guy is shifty on a question, like, would anyone want to hurt your your wife? And he's no, everybody loves Janet.

SPEAKER_00 31:57

Everybody loved her.

SPEAKER_02 31:58

As he's leaving, uh, Sam tosses in the hex bag, and Dean's immediately like, oh, gross. Yeah, it's so much funny. So they open it, it's filled with like rabbits' bones and bird bones, and like a piece of cloth owned by Janet, the first victim. And uh Dean hates witches. He and Sam points out, he's like, This is old witch stuff, this is not like new age.

SPEAKER_00 32:16

Old world black magic specifically.

SPEAKER_02 32:18

Yeah, and Dean just goes, it's creepy, it's downright unsanitary. Dean hates witches.

SPEAKER_00 32:22

He's kind of a secret germophobe, if you think about it. Like that that comes up a couple times. Um, and he also mirrored again my thoughts of them like, oh god, damn it. It's gotta be gross this episode.

SPEAKER_02 32:32

Yeah. So uh really gross, and he hates witches, and now they have to figure out what happened.

SPEAKER_00 32:38

I did not write down the full um line, but he says specifically he calls one craggy old Blair Bitch in the woods. He's a poet.

SPEAKER_02 32:47

He's really a poet.

SPEAKER_00 32:48

He's a poet.

SPEAKER_02 32:49

So um they drive off to go search for more clues or whatever. We cut to Yeah, we cut to woman gardening, Elizabeth. This is Elizabeth, she's gardening, and uh her neighbor gets out of the car and she goes, Amanda, Amanda, and she stops, bag full of groceries in her hand. She's like, sorry, my mind's a million places. You didn't come to book club, and she's like, I know. And she walks inside. And when she walks inside, she opens up her oven oven and pulls out like a rotted turkey filled with bugs and worms and maggots and stuff. Uh-huh. So this is clearly our witch. Uh-huh. Um, she sits it down and uh there's a really beautiful close-up of all the maggots. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:25

So we we we This is my thing that I hate.

SPEAKER_02 33:28

Yeah, we fade from that to the moon and we pan down, and it's the husband from the beginning, Arthur, I think, is his name. Yeah. Paul. Paul, yeah, Paul Arthur something.

SPEAKER_00 33:36

Paul Arthur Dutton, and I kept remembering because I was like, Yellowstone?

SPEAKER_02 33:39

Yeah. Anyway, so he's eating the hamburger in the car looking sad because his wife is dead.

SPEAKER_00 33:44

Yeah, when you're freshly widowed and you eat a burger alone in your car.

SPEAKER_02 33:47

That's what I plan to do when you're freshly murdered. Like, so um gotcha, honey. Yeah, good. I'm glad we're on the same page. So he's doing that, and she starts uh casting her spell, and she likes you know, you made your meal, now you're gonna choke on it. And she stabs it, the the thing with a knife, and she puts one of his watches on it, pours blood on it, the whole thing, stabs it, and he s takes a bite of the burger sits the burger down for a second. The the the car like shuts off. The burger has maggots inside of it. And he picks it up and takes a bite, he's like, What's going on? And he looks in, sees maggots, and he spits it out and he's freaking out. Radio comes back on.

SPEAKER_00 34:22

Uh I got a sp I put a spell on you.

SPEAKER_02 34:25

Yeah, but I put a spell, but before that's uh uh Thorn um Um it's putting Thorn that's playing and then it changes to I put a spell on you and he's like choking and dying and he opens up the car and Sam and Dean like burst over this giant curb and we're not sure why they're there yet. Um, but they rush in and he's choking, he's like, Sam, find it. And Sam gets in the car, finds the hex bag, burns it, and he stops choking, and uh Amanda's thing lights on fire. Her spell like bursts into flames. So uh so you can stop uh uh one of these attacks if you get the hex bag.

SPEAKER_00 34:59

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 35:00

So they were following this guy around because they're like, Who would have a reason to hurt you?

SPEAKER_00 35:04

Yeah, they're like, You're being weird and shifty.

SPEAKER_02 35:06

It's like, yeah, she just tried to kill you, so tell us what's going on. And he explains he was having an affair with someone, Amanda, and he broke it off because she was blackmailing him and he broke it off a week.

SPEAKER_00 35:15

Yeah, he's like, She's being really crazy and weird.

SPEAKER_02 35:17

So she killed him and his wife or tried to kill him and killed his wife. Uh, we cut back to a man and she's flipping through this like like cookbook-looking scrapbook, but it's filled with like scrapbook grimoire. It's filled with all these incantations and spells, and then all of a sudden there's some whooshing around her, and her three slits on both wrists magically appear, and she falls down on the table and she dies. Yeah. In this very cheesy under-the-glass table, which is cool, but it like zooms out to show her wrist. It's very silly. That feels like they punched in a little bit because they they were like, you can't show this for that long. And then they're like, We're still gonna show it a little. It's like zoomed out.

SPEAKER_00 35:50

And you have to respect that.

SPEAKER_02 35:51

Uh, you do have to respect it a little bit. Okay, so then we get uh the Salmandine now know who they have to go investigate, so they unlock uh and break and enter once again, two episodes in a row. I'm living my best life. Uh Salmandine break and enter.

SPEAKER_00 36:03

Do you need me to get you a little cat burglar like exit?

SPEAKER_02 36:06

I would love to learn to pick locks, not for nefarious purposes. I just think it would be really relaxing.

SPEAKER_00 36:10

Okay, I'll start locking the door in our bedroom. Get you a ski mask and you can just go.

SPEAKER_02 36:13

Honey, I can pick that lock in 30 seconds. I can pick a door lock. I want to pick a pad lock. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 36:18

Um we'll start practicing.

SPEAKER_02 36:19

Yeah, thank you. I'll get a lock pixel. Anyway, uh, they break and enter, they go in and they find her remains and her spell work and all this stuff.

SPEAKER_00 36:27

And they're like, well in the scrapboard grimoire.

SPEAKER_02 36:29

Yeah, so they're questioning like, did she kill herself? Did she, what is she? And Dean turns and there's a rabbit hanging from the ceiling and he jumps. He's like, motherfucker. Yeah. And he has this funny thing. He goes, Why does a rabbit always get screwed in the deal? Poor little guy.

SPEAKER_00 36:40

Like, he's like, Well, I didn't know we had I didn't know we cared about them that much. Um Sam finds the hex bag there.

SPEAKER_02 36:46

Sam finds a hex bag under the table and he goes, We're dealing with a coven. So they they've turned on her and they're dealing with a coven.

SPEAKER_00 36:52

Dean goes, witch on witch violence.

SPEAKER_02 36:54

Yeah, Dean hates witches, bro. Um, we cut to book club with the neighbor and Amanda, or uh not Amanda, Elizabeth walks in and Ron, the husband of one of them, is leaving and it's a whole thing. And then they sit down and they're explaining, why are we doing this? Uh Amanda just died, and whoever, whatever her name from the beginning. I can't remember the first victim's name.

SPEAKER_00 37:15

Um Janet.

SPEAKER_02 37:16

Janet died. They're like, look, we're not stopping. Look at all the great things that have happened for us, and you know, you've won all these raffles and you've made all this money, and I have won all my pottery businesses taken off. Um, so they sit down, they lay out their their cloth and candle, and they start and the big leather uh grimoire and they start chanting and casting another spell. Uh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:38

So it's cunt as fuck. I'm sorry, guys. It's so fun.

SPEAKER_02 37:41

It's a great aesthetic.

SPEAKER_00 37:42

It's so fun for them to all be like suburban wine moms that are all like, and we're also practicing dark magic. Yeah, great aesthetic.

SPEAKER_02 37:48

That's cool. Um, Elizabeth is clearly our like chill witch who's not super down.

SPEAKER_00 37:52

She's like, um, I'm really scared that people are like dead. Yeah, is anyone worried about that?

SPEAKER_02 37:57

The next day, Elizabeth is gardening once again, and Sam and Dean walk up. They start asking her some questions.

SPEAKER_00 38:02

She gets a little what they're aliases, they're um detectives Bachman and Turner, which is the Bachman Turner Overdrive band.

SPEAKER_02 38:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:08

That's just a funny thing. You know I love the aliases.

SPEAKER_02 38:11

They start asking about her neighbor Amanda, who had all this occult stuff in her home, and she's like, oh sh and then the two two other witches roll up and interrupt us.

SPEAKER_00 38:19

And Elizabeth goes, but she was an Episcopalian.

SPEAKER_02 38:22

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:24

Um it's funny.

SPEAKER_02 38:25

So anyway, the other witches roll up and they're really snarky and mean and uh get the better of them. So that as they're leaving, they're like, okay, so that's our coven.

SPEAKER_00 38:33

Yeah. Um they clearly clock Sam and Dean, and Sam and Dean kind of clearly clock them back.

SPEAKER_02 38:38

Yeah, and so so essentially they're they kind of bring up like, well, we gotta stop them. Dean's like, yeah, or Sam's like, yeah, we do, we gotta end them. He's like, end them, they're human. He's like, they're witches, they're monsters. They've killed people, they've killed people. And Dean just goes, burn, witch, burn. And again, this scene is setting up more of the like, I'm worried you're becoming more violent stuff, which is like, what are you supposed to do when you come up? You do have clearly fought a witch before.

SPEAKER_00 38:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:58

So you have to know, like, anyway.

SPEAKER_00 39:00

Um, Sam also points out that in he points out that Elizabeth's garden is doing really well for this time of year, and then later points out to Dean that she has Belladonna, Wolf Spain, and Mandrake in there. So she's clearly growing some some important herbs.

SPEAKER_02 39:13

They agree to kill the witches. Paula's driving on the road night, and all of a sudden it stops, and you're like, oh no. The witches, and it rolls to a stop, and there's a woman standing on the road, and Ruby!

SPEAKER_00 39:24

Hey, Diva.

SPEAKER_02 39:25

Uh, Sam gets out, he's like, Hey Ruby, you got it, can what's going on? And Dean comes out with the cult and he goes, Ruby, glad we finally meet, and he cocks it and levels it on her. Big argument, lots of name calling. Uh, and she she essentially she's like, Witches are whores, is what she tells them.

SPEAKER_00 39:41

She said that she's like, Witches serve demons, and this demon does not like Sam.

SPEAKER_02 39:44

Yeah, so he's saying they're they're working for somebody and they need she's telling them to get out of town as fast as they possibly can.

SPEAKER_01 39:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 39:50

Uh, which is cool, and then Dean's gonna shoot her, and Sam stops him, she vanishes, they get back to the motel, they have an argument about this of like she's trying to help us, and Sam's essentially, we have to start playing this multiple levels ahead. We can't start just killing every demon. It's a whole lot which is great for Sam to say who impulsively shot a demon earlier this evening.

SPEAKER_00 40:09

True, correct. Um, but it really is just Dean is mad that Sam is agreeing with him, and then Sam is mad that Dean is mad.

SPEAKER_02 40:17

Yeah, and he's essentially he's like, I you're gonna be gone, Dean. If I'm gonna fight this war, I have to change. He's like, into what? He's like, You. Yeah. I have to be more willing to be like you.

SPEAKER_00 40:27

Into you.

SPEAKER_02 40:27

And again, it's it's kind of a dark version of wanting to be your older brother and looking up to them. It's it's it's sad stuff, it's good. Uh, this whole time Jensen is very subtly adding this like hurt stomach, kind of healing over, and all of a sudden he starts spitting up blood. This is this is a part of the episode I don't love. I wish they had had the witches like closer or something. Like the motel was right down the road, but it's not, it's far away.

SPEAKER_01 40:50

It is.

SPEAKER_02 40:50

So Sam grabs the colt because he can't find he's like literally tearing up the mattress and he cannot find the hex bag. And he grabs the colt and he's Dean's like, Where are you going? He's like, I gotta stop him. So he leaves.

SPEAKER_00 41:01

Gets his way to book club.

SPEAKER_02 41:03

Sorry, I was like, what did you just say?

SPEAKER_00 41:05

It's his way to book club.

SPEAKER_02 41:06

Gets his way to book club, but he's like driving down the road. It's so far away, Dean would never make this, which is why they add in. I mean, they added, I think they should have cut to this sooner, but they uh Sam gets there and he kicks the door open and he's leveling the gun on him. He's like, Stop the spell, get away from the altar, and they back away, and clearly they don't really know what's going on. They're like, We don't even know your brother, whatever. Uh, Ruby busts into the motel room and grabs Dean and slams him on the bed and pours black goo down his throat.

SPEAKER_00 41:31

Like some weird black liquid, yeah. Yeah, it's weird.

SPEAKER_02 41:34

And it fixes him.

SPEAKER_00 41:35

Yeah, he's gonna job. And he's like, and he like makes some equipped and she's like, it's called witchcraft short bus.

SPEAKER_02 41:40

Yeah, and he goes as she's walking away, he's like, You're the short bus. Short bus. Um, so they don't know what's going on, the witches were back with Sam, and he's like, I don't think you know, Elizabeth, and I don't think you know. But he's like, You, why didn't you get anything out of this? Why didn't you ask for anything out of this deal?

SPEAKER_00 41:56

They both have public stuff about them winning. You have nothing. What's up with you?

SPEAKER_02 42:00

Maybe you are maybe you already got what you want, which is their souls, and then she's like, No, I don't, and then she drops the act, and her eyes turn black, and she starts kind of taunting Sam and taunting them. And Sam pulls the trigger on the cult, the bullet slow-mo flies, and she just holds her hand up, it stops and drops. So cool. Not good. Witchcraft demon is awesome.

SPEAKER_00 42:20

Not good, guys.

SPEAKER_02 42:22

Um, it's awesome. The the like the leader of the witches who we thought turns into you can't talk to me like you can't do this, and she the demon goes, her head 360 spins and looks back at Elizabeth and she collapses.

SPEAKER_00 42:35

Yep. She flings Sam into the room.

SPEAKER_02 42:37

Yeah, Sam gets flung and Sam's pinned. Uh, she starts monologuing about how Sam's like, I'm what I know I'm supposed to be this leader of this army. And she goes, Oh, no, no, no, there's a new leader in the West, and he does not like you. She's a true leader. She the demons are starting to rally behind someone. So it's exciting.

SPEAKER_00 42:54

I would like to know who that is, which frankly gun to my head, couldn't remember.

SPEAKER_02 42:58

And she also she also says she's like this demon, and she says it kind of, ooh, is it really a demon? Because I think I remember what's going on. And I think if you had thought about it a little bit, you would you'd catch up.

SPEAKER_00 43:08

I'll think I'll I'll get there. Anyway, they also she makes a joke about getting voted off the island, and I want to know if they got survivor in in hell.

SPEAKER_02 43:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 43:15

Do they like Jeff Probst?

SPEAKER_02 43:16

I think the demons love Jeff Probed.

SPEAKER_00 43:18

They probably have to.

SPEAKER_02 43:19

So anyway, they roll in, uh Sam, or it's not Sam, Dean rolls in and he gets shotgun in hand, and he gets flung against the wall. Yeah, nothing they can do. They're they're going to die. And Ruby walks in and she's like, wait, I just want to talk. And it becomes very clear that Ruby knew this demon. Ruby, and it's revealed throughout this as they begin to fight, but Ruby's trying to play like, I want to serve you again. Yes. I've missed it. And Sam and Dean looks at Sam and goes, Mouse, I told you so.

SPEAKER_00 43:47

So funny.

SPEAKER_02 43:47

And then and then as it's she's like, I've missed it so much, and then cuts to Dean, and Dean goes, I kind of genuinely because J Dean and I clearly both were like, Are they about to kiss? I know it that's what they're going for.

SPEAKER_00 43:57

There's some weird lesbian tension. What's up with that? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 44:00

So we find out, yeah, Ruby used to be this witch who served this demon, and Ruby starts fighting and tries to stab her with a knife. She catches it by the blade. Fight goes on. Ruby does okay, but loses.

SPEAKER_00 44:09

Ruby's kind of getting her ass beat.

SPEAKER_02 44:10

Yeah, and then then She gets thrown into the TV.

SPEAKER_00 44:13

I was like, fucking.

SPEAKER_02 44:13

You're thrown into the TV, hit with a fire poker. There's nothing she can do, but Elizabeth has started at the altar and poured out these like safety pins all over the thing. And she's quietly doing incantations. And the demon starts spitting up blood and spits out these like handful of these. And she turns to Elizabeth and like makes her heart stop.

SPEAKER_00 44:30

Yeah. But crazy.

SPEAKER_02 44:31

She's not fast enough. And Dean gets up and stabs her like eight times in the chest.

SPEAKER_00 44:36

Crazy.

SPEAKER_02 44:37

So Dean gets the kill. It is now Sam 6 and Dean 4. Dean might be making a play. Might be coming back.

SPEAKER_00 44:43

Sam, honey, I'm gonna need you to.

SPEAKER_02 44:44

Yeah, Sam, we need you to win one.

SPEAKER_00 44:46

I need you to win one, buddy.

SPEAKER_02 44:47

Anyway, so uh I I should also add before this, the demon was gonna do this what I think is really cool, a demon-on-demon exorcism. Kind of cool. It gets a different incantation, but the smoke slowly starts coming out of Ruby's mouth. The effect is really cool, too.

SPEAKER_00 44:58

It is really cool. It really does show you it drive, they never stop driving at home how much demons are like, do not put me back there. I do not want to be there.

SPEAKER_02 45:08

They don't like it.

SPEAKER_00 45:09

They hate it.

SPEAKER_02 45:10

Hell's hell, baby.

SPEAKER_00 45:11

Hell's hell.

SPEAKER_02 45:12

Um, so yeah, that happens, and they, you know, they get up, and Ruby's like, You two get out of here, I'll I'll deal with this mess. They pick up the cult and she looks at them, and her eyes go back, she says, Go. They leave, and we cut to Dean's walking from back from the vending machine or whatever at the motel, all the lights start flickering, he's looking around, sees nothing, and then he looks over and Ruby's there, and he walks over, starts, they just start talking, and essentially the conversation um boils down to two things. She's saying, There's no way to save you, and I need you to help me get Sam ready to fight this war.

SPEAKER_00 45:44

And she kind of drops this ultimate bomb of most demons were humans.

SPEAKER_02 45:48

And that's that's the other revelation.

SPEAKER_00 45:50

Yeah, she's never she's like, I've never met one that wasn't a human before.

SPEAKER_02 45:53

She's like, Dean, that's what hell is. Is it peeled? There's pl and Dean's trying to make jokes like I saw Hellraiser, and she's like, that actually got it shockingly right. But there's she's like, there's an actual flame there. And anyway, so Dean is now staring down the idea that he's gonna be turned into a demon eventually. Yeah. She's like, it may take centuries, but it's gonna happen to you.

SPEAKER_00 46:11

Because she says that she, because you know, the demon had revealed that that was she was a witch that you know and we she reveals that Ruby was a witch in like During the plague. During the plague, so like the 1300s, I believe.

SPEAKER_02 46:22

Long time. So yeah, Ruby is very old, and Dean's like, why why are you different? She goes, I don't know, I wish I wasn't, but I just am.

SPEAKER_00 46:30

She's like, I just remember what it was like to be a human.

SPEAKER_02 46:33

And she vanishes, and Dean is left staring there, and Jensen's has to stare down the fact that there's no way to save him. He has to help prepare Sam, and he's going to be a demon.

SPEAKER_00 46:44

Yeah. And Ruby lied to Sam about being able to save Dean.

SPEAKER_02 46:47

Yeah, to get him to talk to her. Anyway, that is where we end our episode.

SPEAKER_00 46:51

Bummer!

SPEAKER_02 46:52

Uh bummer stuff here. Weird one too, but both pagans, so like thematically interesting.

SPEAKER_00 46:56

Yeah, pretty fun.

SPEAKER_02 46:57

Uh anyway, uh anything we missed? This is a cool one. I like I liked this episode more than the Christmas movement.

SPEAKER_00 47:03

This one is is definitely upon re-watching these as an adult. Um, this one is like a stronger episode. Um, I'm really excited to just again, we keep getting more and more of um like demon. Wait, maybe I do remember who the demon is. Wait a damn minute. Maybe I do remember. Do I remember? Maybe I do remember.

SPEAKER_01 47:21

Hmm.

SPEAKER_00 47:24

Okay, yeah, I do remember.

SPEAKER_02 47:25

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 47:26

Steel trap up here.

Best of "Malleus Maleficarum"

SPEAKER_02 47:28

Anyway, uh, best line.

SPEAKER_00 47:30

I'm gonna just do a dust. I'm gonna do a justice. Craggy old Blair bitch in the woods.

SPEAKER_02 47:37

Uh mine is uh why does the rabbit always get screwed in the deal? Poor little guy. It just made me laugh. It's it's funny. Uh best kill. Teeth. Teeth falling out. Teeth fall out. Great kill. Great kill. So violent, so gross.

SPEAKER_00 47:49

That's gonna do numbers on the bracket for you, I think.

SPEAKER_02 47:52

Well, the this season, I'm not even gonna lie to you, unless there's something I really forgot. This season has its winner already.

SPEAKER_00 47:57

Who's to say?

SPEAKER_02 47:58

And you you can't even argue it.

SPEAKER_00 48:01

We can't argue, but we might we might see. There might be some people going places at the end of this season. Who's to say? I forgot about that. Okay.

What to watch for next week

SPEAKER_02 48:09

Anyway, uh, you have one week from today, from the release of this episode to watch the next two episodes of Supernatural, which are season three, episode 10, Dream a Little Dream on Me, and season three, episode eleven, Mystery Spot.

SPEAKER_00 48:21

Oh, fuck. We made it, boys. I'm so excited.

SPEAKER_02 48:25

So tell all of your friends to go watch, start watching this podcast and start watching Supernatural because we're just gonna gush about Mystery Spot because it's so good.

SPEAKER_00 48:32

I'm so excited. Uh anyway.

SPEAKER_02 48:35

It's I just come on the podcast. This is gonna be the best day ever. Anyway, finishing my heart. Come on the podcast. Anyway, between now and then, you know what you gotta do. Gotta get your journal, gotta hit the road, gotta watch some TV, but remember, you know what's out there. Be afraid of the dark.