Dopamine & Detours

Three Sides To The Truth

Ashley and Jordan

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This week on Dopamine and Detours, we bounce from Euphoria conversations and locker room dad jokes to deeper topics like questions couples should ask before having a baby and the experience of testifying in court. We also recap our Salt Lake trip and talk Justin Bieber at Coachella. A little serious, a little funny, and plenty of detours along the way.

SPEAKER_01

What's up?

SPEAKER_04

What's up?

SPEAKER_01

My guys.

SPEAKER_04

And gals. I got some constructive criticism from my aunt. She's listening now. Love you. But it annoyed me so much.

SPEAKER_01

We get it. You guys want guests back? It's a lot. It's a lot to do.

SPEAKER_04

I know. I know. I want guests back too, but I do not have the energy.

SPEAKER_01

Sorry, we're letting all the all of you guys down.

SPEAKER_04

At this point, the podcast from my POV is what other people use Instagram and Facebook for. We have the podcast. So like other people are like, here's what we did this weekend, and here's all these photos, and it was so great. Blah, blah, blah. I don't do that on social media. Yeah. Instead, I have a microphone in front of my face, and I l you have to listen to me in your car or at the gym. Yeah. Or while you're doing your laundry.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, where wherever you be listening to us.

SPEAKER_04

I do if we continue this podcast, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

If we continue, we're continuing it. I know, but like after we have Oh, like you mean once there's a baby living in this podcast studio? I mean nursery.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I envision we'll have guests again. I have a guest I keep scheduling, and he keeps canceling rescheduling.

SPEAKER_01

Who? Talon. Sure, you throw him under the bus.

SPEAKER_04

He's busy though. He's been doing haircuts in Pocatello.

SPEAKER_01

He's been doing cuts in salmon. Yeah. Pocatella. So he's in Pocatello need your haircut. Hit up swaggy.

SPEAKER_04

He's busy, but he's the only guest I have planned to come on. Primarily because it's easy. My back hurts and I'm trying to help myself.

SPEAKER_01

I think you got that the wrong way. There you go.

SPEAKER_04

You there we go.

SPEAKER_01

You can like scoot the table. Can I? I think it I mean that thing looks like it's about to fall down.

SPEAKER_04

My back hurts and I need to. I just made this closer to me. Okay.

SPEAKER_01

You good?

SPEAKER_04

I got a lot of front weight going right now.

SPEAKER_01

You're sitting in a recliner.

SPEAKER_04

I know, but my back wasn't touching the back press. That's what the issue was happening.

SPEAKER_00

Oh boy.

SPEAKER_04

I have topics to discuss today. Number one. Is it your front weight? No. Is it your front weight? No, but that is an issue. Getting out of bed is becoming an issue.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, you have to go.

SPEAKER_04

I can no longer roll over, or not roll over, bend over without throwing up a little bit. I think I said that on the last episode. It was nice hanging out with your sister.

SPEAKER_01

Like so you guys could be pre- miserable and pregnant together.

SPEAKER_04

Because I'm alone with you. But then when I was with her and I went to bend over, and she was like, oh wow. And then I was like, I'm so happy that you are here because you know exactly how I'm feeling right now.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

That was such a blessing God gave us.

SPEAKER_01

We'll see.

SPEAKER_04

Right now.

SPEAKER_01

Blessing. I mean for you two, not for Sam and myself.

SPEAKER_04

Whatever. Why?

SPEAKER_01

Nothing. We're not fighting yet right now, so I'm not gonna say anything.

SPEAKER_04

Um, I guess we could talk about our trip to Salt Lake. We could just start there because I just kind of brought it up.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that was fun. We got to go to Salt Lake this last weekend. Well, for the for the day. For the day. It was good. Got to see my dad and my brother. Taylor. Taylor. My nephew.

SPEAKER_04

Cutest baby.

SPEAKER_01

He's so cute.

SPEAKER_04

Holy cow.

SPEAKER_01

He's so happy. He just chills. I think my favorite part about him is he like he has so many like faces that he does to you. But my favorite one is like he'll smirk at you. But I think he does it because he thinks he's supposed to smile at people when they're talking. And he kind of just like gives you a half-ass smirk. Like yeah.

SPEAKER_04

He does. He's really he's such a good baby.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, he's chill. I don't think he I heard him cry one single time we were there.

SPEAKER_04

Jasmine was sitting on a chair holding him, and it broke in slow motion somehow. Like I looked over and she was just on the ground holding him up in the air. And so I was like, oh my gosh, and grabbed him. And I think because everyone reacted like, holy cow! Yeah, he kind of was like, should I cry? He didn't even cry, but he was like, uh, you're okay. He didn't even cry though. It was cute. He he's just so intelligent.

SPEAKER_00

He's pretty chill. He's a pretty chill baby.

SPEAKER_04

He's the most chill baby for the type of life he's had. Life's been hard from him since the moment he's gonna be able to get away.

SPEAKER_01

It's probably why he's chill. He's like, oh this little this little chair broke, like I spent 88 days in the NICU. Come on, dogs. Is that all you got?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, he's great. I love him a lot. I love them. I've been enjoying their company a lot. I'm excited to see them again.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that was fun. I was much needed. I'm glad we got to spend time with them.

SPEAKER_04

I wish it was longer, but I mean no, we went we barely there 24 hours with that.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I got to do a little shopping. It's fun. I fell down the stairs. Actually slipped down the stairs. Immediately popped up. Embarrassed as in front of everybody too.

SPEAKER_04

Like, oh my god. Why are all the pregnant people falling? Your sister was like, I think she was more embarrassed than she was hurt. Exactly.

SPEAKER_01

Oh yeah, your face was so red.

SPEAKER_04

Well, one, it shocked the shit out of me.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

And then everyone was staring at me.

SPEAKER_01

It was carpeted stairs.

SPEAKER_04

I'll get then I napped on the drive home, lovely, while you drove in the rain.

SPEAKER_01

In a monsoon. It was fucking awful. I was white knuckling it for five hours.

SPEAKER_04

Dramatic.

SPEAKER_01

I could not see any the winchill wipers were on high, and I was just like, well, God is leading us right now because I can't see shit.

SPEAKER_04

I'm glad I was asleep. That would have scared me. I don't like being in cars like that.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I think I ate too many sunflower seeds because I was all stressing out. Oh my throat hurts. Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00

Brutal.

SPEAKER_04

Um, let's see what else do I have? Justin Bieber at Coachella.

SPEAKER_01

The beads. So It seemed like he was just chilling. He was just like, hey guys, why don't you just come hang out and watch me sing YouTube?

SPEAKER_04

So I've seen videos. I cried, of course.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, you cr I woke up on Sunday morning and you were watching that crying.

SPEAKER_04

It was beautiful. But the comments are confusing.

SPEAKER_01

I think people were upset about it.

SPEAKER_04

Well, that's what I'm saying is that the comments, everyone's like, people are complaining, and I've like not really seen anyone complaining about it.

SPEAKER_01

Every video that I saw of somebody that was there was like, it was amazing.

SPEAKER_04

Tana, what's her last name? Monagu? What? Tana.

SPEAKER_01

Tana?

SPEAKER_04

Tana.

SPEAKER_01

Tana. I don't know who the hell Tana is.

SPEAKER_04

The blonde girl I showed you. The people out there now. She was saying that there was a lot of people in the artist section talking shit about his performance. But other than that, I haven't really seen any complaints. I liked it.

SPEAKER_01

They were probably talking shit because wasn't he the highest paid artist at Coachella?

SPEAKER_04

And they were like, he's just sitting up there with a laptop.

SPEAKER_01

Seemed like he was having a great time.

SPEAKER_04

It seemed like he was just chilling with all of us.

SPEAKER_01

Good for him. The human the people are lucky. He's even performing still. True. And he was paying homage to like what got him famous. He's found on YouTube making cover songs. So like, doesn't that seem fitting to like be performing at one of your biggest performances ever to be like paying homage to that?

SPEAKER_04

Mm-hmm. I liked it. It was nice to see him again performing. He looks happy. He sang um gospel songs.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. He's Christian.

SPEAKER_04

He is Christian. I appreciated that.

SPEAKER_01

Cried. You know what made me feel bad for him? Is I s that video of the paparazzi. It was like it was like a montage of paparazzi like following him and him being like so polite to them and be like, Do you guys really have to do that right now?

SPEAKER_04

Like can you please him slowly losing his mind over the years? Yeah. Like him in the beginning was like, oh, this is just part of the fame. And then the slow decline of him trying to be polite and then eventually him being savage.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I couldn't imagine. Just the video where he was like, I'm just trying to go on a walk.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Will you please leave me alone? I couldn't imagine not being able to leave my house and go on a walk.

SPEAKER_01

I just came out of church.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

He's like, uh I went I went in there to get rid of all my demons, and I come back and you guys are just here. Like I can't get away from it.

SPEAKER_04

Give me a moment. Yeah, I feel bad for him.

SPEAKER_01

I could never be famous like that.

SPEAKER_04

No.

SPEAKER_01

Absolutely not. Imagine we're just filming this podcast right now, and there's just paparazzi outside.

SPEAKER_04

I couldn't even imagine that many people listening to this podcast.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I mean, just like imagine that you're so famous you have paparazzi outside your house.

SPEAKER_04

All the time. Props to Haley marrying into that.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, wasn't she kind of famous too?

SPEAKER_04

I mean, c yeah, but not Justin Bieber level fame. I don't even know why she was famous before she met him. Her dad was an actor.

SPEAKER_01

Rich people things, I don't know.

SPEAKER_04

She was friends with the Kardashians.

SPEAKER_01

Rich people things. Rich people things.

SPEAKER_04

Uh you went to court.

SPEAKER_01

I did go to court. Oh, something, I tell ya.

SPEAKER_04

Do you want to talk about it?

SPEAKER_01

The podcast made its first appearance in court. Shout out to Opami and D tours.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, it did.

SPEAKER_01

Over something that we said. It wasn't even bad.

SPEAKER_04

No. Hey, I have no regrets about what I said.

SPEAKER_01

What he referenced, what the lawyer referenced was Well, tell us, tell us what I'm saying. I wanted to be a little mouthy, but I didn't want to get anybody in trouble.

SPEAKER_04

Well, with debriefing with everyone, it sounds like you did really good.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, shout out the podcast. I was not. I was like scared. I was a little bit nervous. Mainly I just didn't want to say something to get somebody else in trouble. Right.

SPEAKER_04

So Well now you have to share the story of what he said.

SPEAKER_01

Oh yeah, I was about- I was about to. Okay. He the Lord was like.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, well, I guess backstory. How do we even for the people who we're just assuming everyone knows what we're talking about? Gordon had to go to court for mutual friends, divorce peering.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, divorce custody battle.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

But like they don't really need to know that much of the backstory, right?

SPEAKER_04

I mean, I was just trying to give a. That's why I'm saying those we're assuming that everyone consumes every episode of our podcast and remembers everything we talked about.

SPEAKER_01

And this was like back in November, I think. That's why I'm saying she was like, You have a you and your wife have a podcast, correct? Dopamine and detours. And I was like, Yes, sir, we do. And he goes, on November blah blah blah, 2025. Did you say there's always three sides of every story, his side, her side, and the truth? And I was like, Yeah, that sounds about right, yes. And then he goes, You've you're this is your best friend, you've considered him like a brother, and I was like, Yeah. And they're like, he was like, Well, you you've even stated that you would take a blow for him. And I was like, probably didn't say it like that in my head, but I was like, Yeah. I probably said, Yeah, I'd take a bullet for him, whatever. Yeah. And he goes, Okay, well, Mr. Forrest, what side of the story are you here to tell today? I was just like, the truth.

SPEAKER_04

Did you say the truth, obviously, or just the truth?

SPEAKER_01

I just said the truth. What I wanted to say was, how dare you attack my character and act like like insinuate that I'm just gonna be up here lying to you? You little fucking oh, I'm like that guy. Anyways, I just was like, didn't I was just like, stay focused, just be polite, this thing things. Yeah, I uh it sucks, dude. Don't get divorced, people.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I will say that this divorce is helping our marriage.

SPEAKER_01

I mean, not like that we were in trouble, but like, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

It's giving perspective.

SPEAKER_01

It just there's just so much that goes into it, and even I don't I don't honestly, I don't think either one of them like at this point want to see the other hurt. But I do think like you get to a point where you're trying to get the best for yourself. Whether that be out of the assets or out of the custody or like is as like mutual as as mutual as it could be, and you were like, you'd be like, Yeah, I just I hope the best for you, whatever. I still think one party or both parties come out, and I'm just talking about in general, come out to be like trying to come up on the other side. Like, you know what I'm trying to say? Like, yeah. One party's always gonna try and come up higher than the other one. Mm-hmm. Like getting more money or whatever it is.

SPEAKER_04

It's easy out here for us to say this isn't even about you guys. You should be having your kid in the forefront of all of the the decisions you're making, and that they should be the main focus on why you're doing the things you're doing and what's best for them. But I'm sure when you're in there and you're mad, that's much easier said than done. Yeah, that was a lot for you.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, it was all day long.

SPEAKER_04

That was crazy.

SPEAKER_01

I didn't have to be there all day long.

SPEAKER_04

I gave you chores. I thought you were gonna come home and do chores.

SPEAKER_01

No, I was well, I got there at like 10 and then I didn't go into the courtroom because I couldn't go in until after I until after I took the stand. Once I took the stand, I could stay in for the rest of the the court hearing. But yeah, it was we took a I went in there, I was on the stand for like, I don't know, like 15 minutes. It was pretty quick for me. Like it could have been a lot worse. They could have asked me a lot more questions that that would have been like challenging. It was just it is just a messy situation. And uh hopefully it works out for them both. Honestly, I just hope it works out for their son the best the most. Like I just hope that it doesn't affect him growing up. Just because I know how hard it can be for kids to grow up in that situation. Like I you know, like I grew up in a split family my whole life. Like that's all I knew. My parents were never really together, is that I can remember, you know, they were together when I was just a baby, but like that's just that was just normal for me. And I think that kind of helped. I mean, it wasn't easy either, like when only getting to see my dad on like holidays or like spring break or whatever it was that was hard. And I always was like, I would take it out on my mom, even though it wasn't my mom's fault necessarily. So I just hoped that it works out for him. And then like I said, seeing it happen to my brothers too, which was worse because they were a little bit older, and it was hard. It was hard, and I felt really bad for my mom because my mom was just trying to get into a better position for herself and for us, and my brothers were too young to really see that, and they just really I think it's just hard for kids to understand that and to navigate that and well, yeah, there's some resentment being your mom's divorce from one of your brothers towards her, and she was just trying to do the best she could. Yeah, and like obviously she didn't want to like totally uproot their lives.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, divorce with kids. Yeah, it's so hard.

SPEAKER_01

It's just hard, it's super hard on kids, and I just hope that I hope everything works out for the best. He's a good kid and he'll be alright. But yeah. Shout out to you people out there holding it together.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. So yeah. It's definitely I don't know, like I said, given me perspective on our relationship and now bringing a baby into it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, same. Well, the weird thing is, is like like I said, I grew up around it and I grew up in it, and I've seen so much of it, but now as an adult, I don't think I realized like the heaviness of it all. Well, yeah, we're adults. Until I was like there in court and I was just like Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

So you did well.

SPEAKER_01

Hope you guys don't have to deal with that in your lives. Yeah, same. On a on a more uh happy note.

SPEAKER_04

Okay.

SPEAKER_01

Do you want to hear what happened to me today in the locker room after I worked out?

SPEAKER_03

Sure.

SPEAKER_01

There's this random dude. Well, I guess he's part of the regulars, but he's been gone for two months, so I haven't seen this guy.

SPEAKER_04

Wait. How do you know he's part of the regulars?

SPEAKER_01

Because he was talking to my other regular guy friends.

SPEAKER_04

I was gonna say, was he like, I'm a regular here, I've just been gone.

SPEAKER_01

No, he was talking to there's two guys that work out together every day. I I think they're just friends. They're I think they're just pals, two old white dudes. And they uh they talked to like they go on family vacations together or whatever. One guy just had s shoulder surgery, so he can't really do much, but they work out together, blah, blah. They were new guy was talking to them, and they're like, Catching up and then he's like, Oh yeah, you guys want to hear a joke? And he had like a whole fucking Animal Kingdom like bit.

SPEAKER_04

Was this just in the locker room or in the sauna?

SPEAKER_01

No, this was in the locker room. Like I had just got out of the sauna and I was like, I had took a shower and I was getting changed and ready for work, whatever. But he was like, Why did the elephant paint his nuts red?

SPEAKER_04

Why?

SPEAKER_01

So he could hide in the cherry tree.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01

Have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree?

SPEAKER_04

No.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, me neither. That's why it works. And I chuckled and I was like, oh. And I was just in the corner. Like, that's so stupid. And then he goes, Do you know what the loudest sound in the jungle is?

SPEAKER_04

What?

SPEAKER_01

A giraffe eating cherries from a cherry tree.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01

Right? So then I chuckle again and then he's like, Yeah. Do you know how to do you know how to put an elephant inside a refrigerator? How? You open the door, put the elephant in and close the door. Yeah. And I was like, oh. He's like, how do you know how you put a giraffe in the refrigerator?

SPEAKER_04

How?

SPEAKER_01

When the one guy was like, you open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. And he was like, oh, close. You forgot to take the elephant out.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01

And I'm just like laughing because they're so stupid. Dad jokes, right? Dad jokes. And then he looks over at me and he's like, look at Slim Shady over here, busting up laughing.

SPEAKER_04

Why are you slim shady?

SPEAKER_01

Then I like looked around. I was like, sir, I think I have too much melanin to be slim shady. What is happening? Why am I slim shady? Are you talking to is there somebody else laughing in here? No, I was indeed slim shady.

SPEAKER_04

I was indeed slim shady.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. So I didn't have anything witty to say to him because he caught me off guard.

SPEAKER_04

With your pants off. I'm just kidding.

SPEAKER_01

And I was like, well, I gotta get out of here and go to work. Had enough. And then the one guy, one of the regular guys, was like, Do you have any jokes that aren't animal related? And then he kept going off and I left. So yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Cool story, bro.

SPEAKER_01

Well, and a animal kingdom bit.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, I'm pretty impressed that you re could remember them.

SPEAKER_01

I think there were some that I forgot. He kept going.

SPEAKER_04

Old white dudes love a good dad joke.

SPEAKER_01

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Oh shoot, I had notes. Let me see. Do-do-do.

SPEAKER_01

What else did you have for the people?

SPEAKER_04

Oh, euphoria.

SPEAKER_01

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Thoughts.

SPEAKER_01

It's gonna be fucked up.

SPEAKER_04

The new season of Euphoria came out. For those of you who don't know what we're talking about, go watch Euphoria.

SPEAKER_01

If you haven't, uh let me preface this for you guys. It is kind of fucked up the first season.

SPEAKER_04

Yes.

SPEAKER_01

Because there's a lot of sex and nudity in it. And the fucked up part about it is they're playing high school.

SPEAKER_04

Uh Jordan hates that. Jordan hates when he's watching a show and there's naked girls or there's sex and they're supposed to be high schoolers. I mean valid.

SPEAKER_01

Valid. It's weird. Even though I know they're a like, of course I'm gonna look at Sydney Sweeney's boobs. Come on. But like the fact that she's supposed to be a 17-year-old senior in high school makes it a little weird.

SPEAKER_04

I agree. That's a green flag that you think that's weird.

SPEAKER_01

So just giving the people a warning, that's what happens in the first season.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

And there's gays and trans, and it's it's there's a it's a lot to unpack.

SPEAKER_04

There it's a lot to unpack.

SPEAKER_01

Drugs. There's yeah. Yeah. It's good.

SPEAKER_04

It is good.

SPEAKER_01

It is good. I enjoyed it.

SPEAKER_04

You do finish an episode and you're like quiet for a while and then you Yeah, you kind of have to process like what the fuck just happened. What just happened? Like the episode last night.

SPEAKER_01

Mm-hmm. I didn't know well, I kind of called it.

SPEAKER_04

What?

SPEAKER_01

Well, I don't want to spoil or alert the people if they haven't seen it.

SPEAKER_04

Well, now I want to know what you called.

SPEAKER_01

You were sitting next to me when I called it about her per what was what she was doing.

SPEAKER_03

Rue?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Ow.

SPEAKER_01

Running drugs.

SPEAKER_03

Hmm. Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01

Kind of checks out for her.

SPEAKER_04

That's not a spoiler. You learned that right in the beginning.

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_04

Um, okay, then spoilers. I bet none of you have watched the new episode yet because we don't really have lives, and you all probably have lives and you go out in the world and you do things. So spoilers.

SPEAKER_01

We just came back from a whole nother state. What are you talking about?

SPEAKER_04

For a one-year-old birthday party.

SPEAKER_01

The cutest one-year-old on the planet, bro.

SPEAKER_04

True. Anyway.

SPEAKER_00

Come correct.

SPEAKER_04

I didn't really understand the dynamic between Oh my gosh, what is his name? Cassie and What's his name?

SPEAKER_03

Nate.

SPEAKER_04

Nate. There's a scene and they're at dinner together. And they have a conversation. And the whole time I was thinking, did they forget who Nate is?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, they made him kind of well, did you hear me say like he's kind of a pussy?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I was just confused because he was like trying to put pieces together of are they I don't know. Everyone watched the episode, let me know what you thought.

SPEAKER_01

I figured he'd be way more controlling. Yeah. Because how he was with Maddie. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I don't know. That was strange. That dynamic was strange. I did like that there's another character that you assume is gonna go be a bad bitch. And she kind of I mean she is, but she even isn't she's like hardly making any money and kind of her life on Instagram is way better than her actual real life.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I think that's a lot of people.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, so I liked that. That felt relatable.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, this one should be different because it's five years post them high school. So you can look at them naked now.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. We didn't get nope, that's too much of a spoiler.

SPEAKER_01

We almost got to see Sidney Sweeney's boobs.

SPEAKER_04

We watched Housemaid. You got to see her boobs.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I did. That's a fucked up show.

SPEAKER_04

You can't do any spoilers on that.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Jordan didn't see it coming. I don't think anyone who hasn't read the book sees it coming.

SPEAKER_01

I did see it coming.

SPEAKER_04

After so long.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I seen it coming, but the tr the the breadcrumbs were already left.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I mean you followed the movie exactly how they wanted you to.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I would have too had I not read the book.

SPEAKER_01

No, you don't.

SPEAKER_04

You're like, wow, look at this crazy bitch. Um the acting was really good though. What is her what is her name? Amanda Seyfried?

SPEAKER_01

Bro, you know I don't know that stuff.

SPEAKER_04

The wife?

SPEAKER_01

I know who you're talking about, but I don't know who she is.

SPEAKER_04

What do you mean? You knew who I was talking about, but you don't know who she is.

SPEAKER_01

I knew uh in the context that you were talking about the wife, but I don't know her name. I don't be knowing actors and actresses.

SPEAKER_04

I thought she did a really good job. That was all I was trying to say. You are a hater though.

SPEAKER_01

Why?

SPEAKER_04

Because you make fun of me for knowing all these actors and actresses.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, but that's your lane. Like I could tell you almost every single golfer on the PGA tour. Or like anybody on the Dallas Cowboys or even in the NFL or the NBA. But I couldn't tell you who actors and actresses are.

SPEAKER_04

Like you couldn't tell me who Paul Feeg is.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I know. No quote, does he eat figs?

SPEAKER_04

What did you say? You don't know who he figs.

SPEAKER_01

No, does he eat figs?

SPEAKER_04

Does he eat figs? Probably.

SPEAKER_01

Fig Newtons.

SPEAKER_04

We probably do.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I don't know. That's not my that's not my lane dog.

SPEAKER_04

That's okay.

SPEAKER_01

You know what else uh we need to talk about? I've had a freaking ingrown arrow on the inside of my.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my god, we don't need to talk about it.

SPEAKER_01

Five days, and every time I sit down, it hurts. I tried to tell Ash to pop it and she wouldn't do it.

SPEAKER_04

Because there's nothing to do.

SPEAKER_01

I was like, you need to dig the hair out of my leg.

SPEAKER_04

It's I'm gonna have to literally slice your leg open. It is not like a popable. No.

SPEAKER_01

I would love that because it hurts.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my gosh, you guys.

SPEAKER_01

It's got its own gravity.

SPEAKER_04

It's so large.

SPEAKER_01

It's graduated to a boil, I think.

SPEAKER_04

I don't know how to help you. Keep putting the heat.

SPEAKER_01

Clearly, you don't know how to help me.

SPEAKER_04

Well, one, I can't slice you open. I will pass out.

SPEAKER_01

Sit down.

SPEAKER_04

How will that help us in this situation? Now you just have an open wound on your leg and I'm passed out.

SPEAKER_01

Well. I kept squeezing it and that made it work.

SPEAKER_04

I told you to stop squeezing it.

SPEAKER_01

ChatGBD said, You're forcing the infection deeper into your leg.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, you are. Because you haven't stopped fucking with it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. And if I I might die.

SPEAKER_04

I hope your mom's listening to this right now and she calls you and she says She's the one I learned it from.

SPEAKER_01

What? She used to get ingrown hairs and she would like she would like dig them out and they would be like an inch long. They were growing still.

SPEAKER_04

There's a difference under the between if yours had a white head, it there's nothing there to pop. It's just a red bump under your skin.

SPEAKER_01

I want you to get the hair out of it.

SPEAKER_04

There's how?

SPEAKER_01

With a needle.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my goodness gracious.

SPEAKER_01

I don't know. Be resourceful.

SPEAKER_04

You be resourceful. All you've done is complain and try to pop it.

SPEAKER_01

Well, the problem is, is even with my glasses, I can't get my face close enough to my leg to see where the hair's at.

SPEAKER_04

I'm right here and I can't see it.

SPEAKER_01

I'm not that flexible. I can't like contort to get my leg. It's like in the inside of my thigh, you know? I can't bend like that.

SPEAKER_04

Fine. We will go look at your ingrown hair after this podcast. Yeah, we will. Why are you smirking like that?

SPEAKER_01

Because it's gonna feel so good.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01

That baby's going out of my leg.

SPEAKER_04

If it's not one thing, it's another with you. My back hurts. My ingrown hair.

SPEAKER_01

My ears hurt. At least I can bend over without throwing up.

SPEAKER_04

Damn. Called out.

SPEAKER_01

I learned this weekend that Sam is a better husband as for a pregnant lady than I am. How? Because Sam just is like, yes. He's like a yes dear. He's smarter about it. He knows how to avoid the fight. See now I'm just dumb on that side, and I what it when it comes to my brain, I say it.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. And then and I'm glad I heard that my brother's the same.

SPEAKER_04

Tyson? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Taylor was like, Your brother did the same thing.

SPEAKER_04

Just says whatever comes to your heads.

SPEAKER_01

Mm-hmm. And like not helpful shit either.

SPEAKER_04

Sam might have an upper hand because he grew up with two sisters.

SPEAKER_01

That's what he said.

SPEAKER_04

He said, I grew up with sisters, and I was like, And he's been with your sister for a long time now, so he knows better. And no offense, Jasmine, I know you're listening to this, but she's a little meaner than me.

SPEAKER_01

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, touche. I think she has more spice in her than me.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I think I'm less afraid of her than you.

SPEAKER_04

Well, that's your sister. She's spicy. I cry. She is spicy. She's spicy.

SPEAKER_01

She is spicy, don't get me wrong.

SPEAKER_04

So he's had to learn to navigate.

SPEAKER_01

You scare me more than she's scared.

SPEAKER_04

See, like, I start crying where she would probably have a retort.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, she might punch you too. Potentially.

SPEAKER_04

Um, should we read some stories? I have Okay, I have some options. We can either read a Reddit story or essential questions couples should discuss before having a baby.

SPEAKER_01

I guess we could do that. Do we not have a baby update for the people, do we?

SPEAKER_04

I mean, other than I bend over and throw up a little bit now? No.

SPEAKER_01

You went to the doctor though.

SPEAKER_04

Oh.

SPEAKER_01

Didn't you?

SPEAKER_04

My glucose test is coming up. Yeah, when do you have to do that? May 7th.

SPEAKER_01

Have you heard horror stories? Um, I mean, yeah, but I don't Don't people say it's disgusting and makes them nauseous.

SPEAKER_04

So my doctor was like, I know you've heard all types of things, want to be heard, and I was like, I've just heard people don't enjoy it. And he's like, I think that people complain about the three-hour test, and then now it's all just grouped into one.

SPEAKER_01

What is the three-hour test?

SPEAKER_04

If you fail the first glucose test, you have to take the three-hour glucose test.

SPEAKER_01

Oh, yeah, no, that sounds like a problem.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. You have to stay at the doctor's office or the hospital for three hours. That sounds terrible.

SPEAKER_01

What happens if you like how I don't know anything about this? Then make sure you don't have diabetes.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, let's look, let's ask chat real quick.

SPEAKER_01

Be careful, because uh I use I tried to use chat today to help me with uh training that I was doing, and I had like I watched a video and I tried to I use Chat GPT to help me with the test after my training. And the annoying thing is is it lets you test out of the trainings, but if you don't watch the videos and you just go and try and test out, you have to get an 80 or a 90%. Whereas if you watch the video first and then you take the test, you only have to get a 70 to pass. These videos are like an hour.

SPEAKER_04

Cool story, bro. What's the point of this with ChatGPT?

SPEAKER_01

I used it to help me take the test to test out of it so I didn't have to watch the videos, and it got me a 69%. So I had to watch the fucking videos.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, so this is a prime example of why people don't always trust chat. No, but that's common knowledge right now, bro.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I know, but I was like, maybe it knows some other things.

SPEAKER_04

I thought you learned a lesson when you were trying to do math on this wall and it was wrong.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I don't trust it all all the time, but I didn't know the answers either, and I wanted to test out of it.

SPEAKER_04

I utilize Google.

SPEAKER_01

So I was like, hey bro, help me out.

SPEAKER_04

Unless it's a quick question like this, because I find it's easier when it's a quick question like this than having to go to Google and then it gives you the websites, and then you kind of you have to do a little more searching there, but Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Maybe I should switch to what's the other one called? Uh, what's Joe Rogan's? He always says it in this fucking and our and our sponsor perplexity. Jamie, put that in our sponsor perplexity.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, what's the point of the glucose test? Gestational diabetes.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I knew that part.

SPEAKER_04

How your body breaks down sugar, releases insulin, bring your blood sugar back down. This test tracks if your body is doing that properly. The basic version drink the glucose drink, wait an hour, get your blood drawn. Are you? So that's what I'll do.

SPEAKER_01

So he told me, well Or are you supposed to drink it an hour before you show up to your Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

So he told me I can eat breakfast still. He said, if you have your appointment at the same time you had your appointment today, you can still eat breakfast at the same time you eat breakfast. Drink the drink. On the drink it says 40 minutes, but everything else has said an hour. An hour before you're you get here. And then we'll draw your blood. It's super common to need the second test. Hate that. Hate that information.

SPEAKER_01

Don't always trust chat remember.

SPEAKER_04

Well, I've been wondering because Whitney Simmons, the girl, the I know who she is. I don't know how it happened, but I'm pregnant. She had to take the three-hour glucose test, and she's a health and fitness coach. So I've been wondering, hmm.

SPEAKER_01

But this is what I don't know. Why does being pregnant give you gestational diabetes? Because your body is slinging that energy to the baby or to grow the baby, or what?

SPEAKER_04

Please hold. It's not actually about you doing anything wrong. Pregnancy itself changes how your body handles sugar. During pregnancy, your placenta releases hormones that help your baby grow. But those same hormones can make you more insulin resistant.

SPEAKER_01

I think you're fine because you'd be eating so much chocolate mousse that's basically just melted sugar.

SPEAKER_04

I know what I want it right now.

SPEAKER_01

With whipped cream that's homemade with also sugar. So I think you're you should be good.

SPEAKER_04

Bottom line, pregnancy basically puts your metabolism on quotes hard mode. And gestational diabetes just means your body needs a little help keeping things balanced.

SPEAKER_01

So what do they do if you have it?

SPEAKER_04

Oh goodness.

SPEAKER_01

Did you not ask the doctor these questions?

SPEAKER_04

Well, I know from Or did you black out? I didn't ask because I'm gonna pass.

SPEAKER_01

According to chat, you're probably gonna have to take a second one.

SPEAKER_04

Oh no. You monitor your blood sugar with a small finger prick at home, usually four times a day. We are not failing this test.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, but like what do they do? You monitor your blood and they just watch you?

SPEAKER_04

Mm-hmm. I'd have to be on a special diet. I'd be no more chocolate mousse.

SPEAKER_01

You maybe you should slow down on now. You're gonna give yourself the betas.

SPEAKER_04

Oh no. Brandy had it. We're gonna we're gonna close out of that. That's not gonna happen to me.

SPEAKER_01

Also, I didn't ask you. Well, you didn't tell me. Did he say anything about the results from our No. Anatomy scan?

SPEAKER_04

No.

SPEAKER_01

Our place we took a See, this is why I need to be there.

SPEAKER_04

The place we took the anatomy scan hadn't even sent over it to our doctor yet.

SPEAKER_01

That was m almost a month ago.

SPEAKER_04

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01

She said a week.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, yeah, Poro, be ready in a week. So he said that he would get back to me in two days. I'm assuming because I haven't heard from him, everything is fine. I haven't gotten a message on my app, I haven't gotten a phone call.

SPEAKER_01

Some themes, if you want things done right, you just gotta do it yourself.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Do the anatomy scan and send it to the doctor.

SPEAKER_01

I could have. I seen all the angles.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my god. You not you didn't even use proper English in that sentence right now.

SPEAKER_01

I used all the angles. What do you mean? Plus, you don't need to use proper English to move a thing around.

SPEAKER_04

Her job looked hard, so I don't know what you're talking about.

SPEAKER_01

No, her job looks so hard.

SPEAKER_04

That I literally said, wow, this looks really difficult because I have no idea what we're looking at right now.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. She was like, oh, look at here, this is this. And I was like, no. And then she's like, oh, you see? I'm like, oh, yeah. Totally, totally. That's a kidney. Yeah. That's definitely the aorta. See that?

SPEAKER_04

Okay. My partner and I are thinking about having a baby, and we want to make sure we agree on big stuff. What key questions should we consider to be ready for this step? Please, for the love of God, discuss punishments. That was a mistake we didn't discuss beforehand. My husband was a believer in spanking, and I don't believe in physical harm for punishment. Punishment.

SPEAKER_01

Sometimes that kid needs a little splot smack on the booty booty.

SPEAKER_04

You guys were all kind of talking about that this weekend. A little bit.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, we were. You know what? I got raised with some spankins and looking back, I probably deserved them. All of them.

SPEAKER_04

I don't know if I ever got spanked.

SPEAKER_01

You know, my dad only spanked me one time in my entire life.

SPEAKER_04

Why? Do you remember why?

SPEAKER_01

Because I was not I think I was like disrespecting my grandma or something. I don't really remember. But I remember it only took me one time and the next time I would never anytime my dad said something, I did it. It wasn't even hard. But he you know what he would do? He would fucking flick us like with his big old fat fingers right in the middle of our forehead. And that shit hurt. It would like wake you up. What the hell?

SPEAKER_04

I actually don't know what I'm gonna do for punishment.

SPEAKER_01

My mom spanked me a lot because I pushed her buttons a lot.

SPEAKER_04

I could see that because I wish I could spank you.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I would just tell you what I told her. That's all you got.

unknown

Wow.

SPEAKER_04

Our kid is gonna be difficult. And I don't know how I'm gonna punish.

SPEAKER_01

I haven't I mean I think you could definitely overdo it.

unknown

Damn.

SPEAKER_04

I don't know. In my Bible study, they kind of talked about it with your words. But your dad was just saying you need to have a tone of voice.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

And I was thinking, yeah, that's easy for a dad, because Got the dad voice. The dad voice.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I don't know. I don't know the answer to that question.

SPEAKER_01

And how he was like, you need to be assertive because your kids are gonna get to a point where they're gonna try and push you and you have to stay like firm and not let them because once that happens, like then they're just gonna keep pushing you and pushing you around.

SPEAKER_04

If our kid isn't anything like you, I'm gonna get pushed off an edge because you push me.

SPEAKER_01

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Don't push me, because I'm close to the edge.

SPEAKER_01

Lucky for you, it'll be a girl.

SPEAKER_04

How is that lucky?

SPEAKER_01

Uh well, it's only lucky for you until she's like twelve. And then you're screwed.

SPEAKER_03

Moving on.

SPEAKER_04

Consequences versus punishments. Kids get punished for being bad. They face consequences for making bad choices. Some consequences come naturally. Parents fill in the gaps when they don't.

SPEAKER_01

Was that a question or a statement?

SPEAKER_04

Like a statement. I thought it would give me an idea of how I'm going to punish, but it did not. Okay, question. Are we having a child because we want to bring another person into the world, raise them and watch them grow as individuals? Or are we wanting a child because it feels like the next step in the relationship or external pressure?

SPEAKER_01

I bet the latter happens often. And those are the people to get divorced.

SPEAKER_03

Ooh. True.

SPEAKER_01

Because they're like, oh, we're married, we bought the house. Like, now I guess we're supposed to have kids.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, fill it with some kids. We had to go through a lot to get here. So even if in our original decision to have kids was because it was a next step, which it wasn't.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, we went on a detour.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. We had to we had to fight for this. So if it was still for external pressure fulfilling a next step, that'd be crazy. Religion. My ex, who was brought up Catholic, but told me she was a non-believer. Guess who all of a sudden is religious again after our kids were born?

SPEAKER_01

Well, I feel like that could make you get back into your faith.

SPEAKER_04

That happened to a friend of mine. She married a Mormon, but when they were dating, he wasn't religious and he didn't care about any of that stuff. She's covered in tattoos and not religious at all. Got married, and then suddenly he wanted to go back into his faith.

SPEAKER_01

How's that working out?

SPEAKER_04

Hey, they've been married 10 years.

SPEAKER_01

Good for them.

SPEAKER_04

But are best separating now, so not great. That's actually the main source of their contention, too.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I think that's a hard one. Because I think I don't know, you kind of go through a hard situation or you see like life being created and it kind of makes you think about things a little bit. Yeah. Maybe that brings that's what brings people back to their faith.

SPEAKER_04

We came to religion before we had the baby. That's kind of funny though, because that's kind of what happened to us. Going through this whole thing brought us to the Lord.

SPEAKER_01

The whole IBS stuff. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Finances. Are you on the same page about what you'll be spending on children? On what sacrifices each of you are willing to make? Money can be one of the biggest sources of conflict and resentment in any marriage. And adding kids to the mix just raises the stakes. If one of you is concerned with saving for kids as futures, and the other wants to spend like you have no responsibilities, this will be a problem. This was a problem with my ex-husband. And it never goes well. Why are you staring at me like what you got? Like what's my answer?

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, you got anything for that?

SPEAKER_04

Um I might be both of them. I wanted to save money and also spend without concern.

SPEAKER_01

Spend it. Spend it. Get them golf lessons to pay for your future.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my goodness. Are we gonna have a college fund?

SPEAKER_01

We'll see how Expensive the World continues to keep being. Because I feel like I well, I n I make more money right now than I ever have ever in my entire life. And sometimes I feel like I had more money when I was like 24 and feeling like I was broke. But I also didn't have a like mortgage and stuff.

SPEAKER_04

That sounds like a J. Cole song. But yeah, our life is more expensive now.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I know, and that's what I'm saying. Like, we're gonna have some babies, so like well, we'll see if we can afford to budget for that college fund. Shoot by the time they go to college, college might not be a thing anymore.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01

Just saying. Old ChatGPT is gonna be like, you don't need to go to school.

SPEAKER_04

It just failed a test for you, so that there it's early. It's early for us. The top 1% has had AI for a long time.

SPEAKER_01

Bro, I'm saying give it another 20 years. Scary. It's already making videos you can't tell are fake or not.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, if not college, a down payment on a house would be helpful to a tiny human. That would be helpful. That would be so helpful. I just saw a whole post about it. This family saved $100,000 for their kid to put down on a house.

SPEAKER_03

Just for them.

SPEAKER_04

I know. It's really a good help to the kid. Division of labor. Is one of you staying home with the baby, or are you both going to continue working? Which things do you want to share equal responsibility for and which will fall on just one of you? Talk through how you can support each other as parents and make sure neither of you feels like you're in it alone.

SPEAKER_01

See, I feel like this topic could be hard.

SPEAKER_04

This will be our problem.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Because I don't know if y'all know how much daycare is. It's not cheap. Found that out. I actually just had a guy that quit my work to stay at home.

SPEAKER_04

Shut up.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

What's his wife doing? Why is it him?

SPEAKER_01

Not that I think that men should his wife make more money.

SPEAKER_04

What does she do though?

SPEAKER_01

I don't exactly know.

SPEAKER_04

Details! Come on, man.

SPEAKER_01

I don't know what she does exactly, but I think her work sells things to my con.

SPEAKER_04

Okay. Interesting.

SPEAKER_01

I don't know.

SPEAKER_04

Damn, and now he how many kids do they have?

SPEAKER_01

Just one.

SPEAKER_04

Fascinating.

SPEAKER_01

I think they also have a rental property, too.

SPEAKER_04

Hmm. Like I think. Is he sad about it or excited?

SPEAKER_01

I think he's excited. I think they both had a house and then they got married and then they kept both of the houses and moved into one and rented one out. Hmm. Something like that. Huh. So I think I mean they're gonna be alright. Obviously, he wouldn't have done it if they weren't.

SPEAKER_04

But it is interesting. Daycare's expensive.

SPEAKER_00

Daycare is expensive.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I don't know. The vision of labor. That's actually gonna be our issue because it's already our issue in our marriage. I think that's the only thing that really creates contention between us.

SPEAKER_01

Well, because you get mad at me for not doing chores.

SPEAKER_04

Mm-hmm. Just because we're different, I'm still learning to live with a boy.

SPEAKER_01

I feel like women don't count outside chores as chores.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my gosh, that's not even it. We're just different, and I'm learning to accept it. I walk into our house and I can immediately see things that need to be done, and I do them. You walk into our house, and it's as if those things do not exist.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, they're not going nowhere.

SPEAKER_04

And you do not do them.

SPEAKER_01

You got time.

SPEAKER_04

It's just different perspectives, boy, girl. Which is fine, except I can see that it will be an issue when we have a tiny human because tiny human's gonna live off of me.

SPEAKER_01

Oh yeah, and I'm gonna probably come in and be like, oh, let's play with the baby.

SPEAKER_04

Well, I'm gonna be like I'm just gonna need you to pick up some of the slack because my OCD and the cleanliness of our house is gonna be a thing for me.

SPEAKER_00

I'll do my best. Thank you.

SPEAKER_04

Stuff I wouldn't have known to talk about. How much time do we have lived? Hot dog, it's almost been an hour.

SPEAKER_01

We have as much time as we want.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, stuff I wouldn't have known to talk about. Share how each of you were raised in detail, how punishment slash consequences were handled, the role each parent had in your lives, how your parents showed love and affection, discuss how you want to be like your own parents and how you want to do things differently. This is especially especially important if any of the grandparents will be around with your children so you know what you want to encourage or discourage from them as well.

SPEAKER_03

Wait.

SPEAKER_01

I was just I was I was just thinking.

SPEAKER_03

What?

SPEAKER_01

I'm just trying to think if there's like anything in there that I needed to fill that I felt like I needed to say. I don't remember a lot of my childhood, so honestly, my parents did a pretty good job, and they're both different people now, too. So I trust both of them. They're all grown-ups now.

SPEAKER_04

They've matured nicely.

SPEAKER_01

They were kids when I was born. I don't remember. Your parents were kids too.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. They matured. My dad. I'm gonna just I'm gonna say my dad's matured well, but then I don't want to talk about my mom, so we're just gonna skirt around this question. This is why I'm in therapy. Anyways, what are your hopes and dreams for your children? What does your ideal future look like with children in it? How willing are you to adjust to that picture to fit in the personalities of your children you actually end up having?

SPEAKER_01

Oh, I just assume a lot of time at the golf course.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01

And then Sienna's gonna let us travel around the world as she makes it on the LPGA.

SPEAKER_04

Love that for her and for you.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, that'd be great.

SPEAKER_04

I don't know. I don't really have hopes and dreams for my I guess I do. My hopes and dreams for my kids is internal love for themselves. So like the things I have aren't outward. Like I don't care what they become or who they love, but I'm more concerned about how much they love themselves and their confidence instilled within them and them knowing who they are and having morals and values within them. That's more of my concerns.

SPEAKER_01

Honestly.

SPEAKER_04

And don't be a stripper. I can't help.

SPEAKER_01

If they're healthy and happy, it's all right.

SPEAKER_04

Don't be a stripper and don't fight MMA.

SPEAKER_01

Ooh, yeah. What if Sienna wants to fight?

SPEAKER_04

No.

SPEAKER_01

Baby, that's good for her to be in jujitsu.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, that's fine, but I can't.

SPEAKER_01

No boys will fuck with her.

SPEAKER_04

I can't watch my kid get knocked out. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_01

Like Macy Barber. I mean, thought she was dead.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, yeah. Two weeks ago? Three weeks ago? Nope. Don't want that. Don't want that.

SPEAKER_01

Maybe she doesn't do MMA, but she can do jujitsu. Or wrestling even.

SPEAKER_04

I'm getting sweaty thinking about this. Okay. What approach do you want to take to discipline? What behavior do you each consider worthy of discipline?

SPEAKER_01

Disrespect.

SPEAKER_04

Hmm.

SPEAKER_01

Disrespect. We're not going to be disrespectful in this house.

SPEAKER_04

I don't really want a lot of talking back either.

SPEAKER_01

None of uh that falls under disrespect.

SPEAKER_04

Okay.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. No back talk.

SPEAKER_04

Just a giant umbrella of don't fuck with me.

SPEAKER_01

That's not gonna happen. I will probably be leading the charge of fucking with you, so you are? I'm just saying I fuck with you a lot, so the kids will probably have to s the kids will probably see that, so I probably need to tone that down. Oh, because they're gonna be like, it's okay to fuck with mom.

SPEAKER_04

I'm glad you're noticing this because I think about it.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I really like to push your buttons.

SPEAKER_04

And then you yell at me when I get mad at you and have attitude.

SPEAKER_01

Well, yeah, because then you start yelling, and I'm like, we don't need to yell. I know I just made you really angry, but the joy of pushing your buttons is getting the rise out of you. But then sometimes it goes too far. And you get real mad. I did it's okay. I did it to my mom too, I'm pretty sure.

SPEAKER_04

That's why she beat your ass.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, she did. She bit my ass good one time. In front of Jordan Snow.

SPEAKER_04

You got beat up by your mom in front of your friends.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, when I was a teenager.

SPEAKER_04

What are your own issues and shortcomings that you want to make sure don't negatively affect your children?

SPEAKER_01

I think I just said it.

SPEAKER_04

Teaching them how to annoy them. Okay, actually, we both had one in this scenario. You being you in that, and then me reacting. Yeah. I react sometimes.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, sometimes.

SPEAKER_04

I react and I don't have I wish I had more self-confidence in myself. Therapy. We're working on it.

SPEAKER_03

Did you hear that?

SPEAKER_04

The dogs?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

They're playing.

SPEAKER_01

Sounds like they're killing each other.

SPEAKER_04

They're not killing each other. I got one quick story just because I'm curious how you will handle this situation.

SPEAKER_00

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

My daughter didn't get invited to a birthday party. I just cried in my car. She's almost four. She's four almost five, just friendly and happy and wants to be friends with everyone. This morning all the girls in class were showing off their nails that they did at a party over the weekend. The girl in question didn't invite my daughter. And they're pretty good friends. Even the teachers were talking about the party and asking all the girls how they liked it. God, I was so sad. This is the second party she didn't get invited to. And like she's friends with all these girls, or so I thought. I know I have no right to dictate who comes to the party, but I'm so sad and mad about this. Not everyone will like her, and she will be left out, and all I can do is pour confidence and love into her. But man, like now I secretly have beef with a four-year-old and her parents. And this isn't logical, just petty, but I'm the room mom, and the amount of times I've helped this girl, she's very sweet, actually. No one's fault. I'm just sad for my sweet, happy little girl.

SPEAKER_01

That's rude.

SPEAKER_04

What would you do?

SPEAKER_01

So sounds like they got their nails done at the party.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I'll take my daughter and we would go to the best fanciest nail lady.

SPEAKER_04

I think the thing I'm curious is how how do you handle like what's the conversation between you and her? I mean she comes home and she's telling you this story.

SPEAKER_01

I'll tell you, well, let's go.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, but she's like, why didn't I get invited?

SPEAKER_01

What's wrong with me? Because people are mean. Some people are just mean. And you can't like let mean people affect you like that. It's okay to be sad and have your feelings hurt, but you can't control other people's actions like that.

SPEAKER_04

That feeling of being left out stays with you.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I don't know how exactly I would handle it. Me either. I would try, I would comfort her. I'd be like, we're going to get your nails done right now, and they're gonna be so cool.

SPEAKER_00

You can show all your friends at school how cool your nails are.

SPEAKER_04

It just sucks because this feels really heavy. This is a lot in one tiny little post. Because the mom's upset.

SPEAKER_01

But maybe the daughter's not as upset as the mom is.

SPEAKER_04

You don't think. I'm just thinking, I bet she's like, why didn't I get invited? What's wrong with me?

SPEAKER_01

Now, if it was like every girl in the class got invited and she was the only one that didn't get invited.

SPEAKER_04

That's what it said.

SPEAKER_01

So she was the only one?

SPEAKER_04

Yes. What? Yes.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, that's the parents then.

SPEAKER_04

Let's read. I think that's what the comments say.

SPEAKER_01

Because if you're gonna invite all the kids in the class, you need to invite all the kids in the class.

SPEAKER_04

It said all the girls in class were showing off their nails, and even the teachers were discussing their nails with them.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

So she's the only one.

SPEAKER_00

That's the parents. That's shame on the parents.

SPEAKER_04

First comment. They're four or five. I think at that age the inviting process is handled at least heavily directed by the parents. So you may have a parent problem, not a child problem.

SPEAKER_01

Or maybe it was an accident and they just didn't give her uh her invitation.

SPEAKER_04

It might have been an oversight. At that age, kids can't coordinate handing out invites or passing information. I recently threw a party for my daughter and just by chance bumped into a mom who did an RSVP and turned out she didn't get the invite. Also, I had another reach mom reach out to me as I hadn't r responded and same thing. Never got the invite.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. Maybe I'll just talk to the parents. Maybe I would just lie to my daughter. It seems like terrible. They've you were invited. They just the mail lady for lost the your invitation in the mail.

SPEAKER_04

And then she goes to school and she's like, I know you invited me. My invite must have got lost in the mail. And then the other girl's like, no, I didn't.

SPEAKER_01

And punch her in the nose.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01

That MMA training is going to come in handy.

SPEAKER_04

These are things we need to think about. Having little girls a lot. I don't I mean this would hurt a little boy's feelings too, but girls internalize more than boys do.

SPEAKER_01

I she's just gonna be the coolest, so we won't have to worry everyone a lot.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, that's what you'd want, right? But your child's also half me, and you tell me I'm not cool all the time.

SPEAKER_00

Oh, you know, kind of a dork.

SPEAKER_04

Oh my gosh. That's all I have. That was a long one.

SPEAKER_01

These jeans are strong, she'll be alright.

SPEAKER_04

You're gonna carry the whole team.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, someone's gonna have to.

SPEAKER_04

I still fall downstairs at the age of thirty-three, so our kids screwed.

SPEAKER_01

No, she's not.

SPEAKER_04

Aww.

SPEAKER_01

She's gonna be just fine. I got this.

SPEAKER_04

Alright, sign us off so they can all go back to their lives.

SPEAKER_01

Alright, party people. Thanks for tuning in to this week's episode. Like it and subscribe it. Subscribe it. Subscribe to it. Jeez Louise. Share with a friend and give somebody a hug. Bye. Bye, you filthy animals.