BAP Talk Podcast

Saving Lives, Raising A Daughter

• BAP

Share episode

Send us a text

Support the show

Part 2 is coming shortly

SPEAKER_00:

I need to be a be a mobile. You not a wife. I can't find a little bit.

SPEAKER_03:

How everybody doing out there today? I'm Baptiste. I'm the host of Bap Talk. Today I got a very special guest on the house. She's a pragmatic. Real talk. I wanna get sick right now. For real, for real. But no though.

SPEAKER_05:

You wrong. Hey, why you mess me up like that, man? Why you do that? Why you doing that, man?

SPEAKER_03:

Like for real though. She's fine like that though. Like for real, for real though. That's what I call her fine shit. But no, I'm a friend though. And look, she's a friend of mine. And I appreciate her coming through, sitting on the Blap Talk. It's gonna be a two-part segment. This part one. But right now though, uh, she's a paramedic. She's doing her thing, she's a hard worker. I don't know why she find that time, but she does her. But I would like to introduce to Madison.

SPEAKER_02:

Copy that, copy that, copy that.

SPEAKER_03:

So, um tell me something about yourself, Madison.

SPEAKER_04:

Um Madison, I I don't know. I haven't really like lived in one specific spot for quite some time. So I'm just kind of bouncing around and I have a beautiful daughter. I work in EMS, but I also work at the hospital in the physical therapy department. I've kind of had a lot of hats. So I do a lot.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay, cup day, cup. Okay. That's that type shit there. So medicine.

SPEAKER_03:

How can I put this? What kind of inspired you to become? Well, I'm gonna call you a paramedic. Or I say an EMS.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, EMS is like the whole thing. So that's emergency services that include like the first responders, the EMRs, the EMTs, which I still technically am in school to be a paramedic. So I appreciate you know being called the paramedic. Not quite there yet.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

Still have to take like the national registry and stuff like that. But with EMS, it includes everything, and then there's branches to EMS.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. All right, type shit. I feel that. So how do you balance that? I mean, like balance that demand, you know, you also say you're a parent, like balancing being uh an EMS worker and being a parent at the same time, because I know as far as like being an EMS worker, a first responder, it's a crazy schedule. So, right, how do you balance that?

SPEAKER_04:

I think just having a lot of um good people to fall back on. Like when things get crazy, so they know, like, hey, I might possibly have you look over my daughter, like just while I go take this call, or maybe I have to run to the ambulance garage and be like backup just in case anything goes out, and then kind of go from there. So it's really nice having family and friends to help out with Lacey. Okay, and then having somebody to uh like rely on that I know is gonna take good care of her while I'm gone. Plus, it's always really fun to see Lacey get excited about an ambulance going by and like my mom drives that one, like she's been in that one. Right. And most of the time I probably have just with different EMS agencies.

SPEAKER_06:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Um but in the agency that I'm in now, she's even gotten to sit in the back with me, or we do parades, and she gets to hand out candy and stuff toys, and she gets to pick out, you know, like who she wants to give them to, so it's really fun to involve her.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay. That sounds exciting. Real exciting. So, what's the hardest part about being all that though? You know?

SPEAKER_04:

I think just wanting to make sure that I'm present for all of her moments.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

As well, because there's some times where I might be on call at night. And if she has something, thankfully, right now, there's not a whole lot going on after school. I mean, she's she's really young, so there's not like after school activities. But once that time comes, you know, there's a chance that I might not be able to make it to one of them.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, right. I I really believe that she understand. She's a big girl now. She's real big. So are there any moments, like are there any moments of your job that make you want to change how you see your life?

SPEAKER_04:

Every day. There's times where we think that it comes in threes. Not like super stitches, but a little stitches. Where Okay, what do you mean by that? Well, just it comes in threes. Like death comes in threes, full moons, stuff like that, you know, like crazy happens when the full moon is out. True. Um so like cardiac arrest, if we have stuff like that, so it can happen anytime, anywhere. I used to teach a lot of the cardiac arrest classes, like the CPR classes in first aid. So I would go around to a bunch of businesses, but also different agencies as well, like firefighters.

SPEAKER_06:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

They would have refreshers, and then I would, you know, essentially just tell them this is CPR, this is first aid, this is what's changed over the last couple of years, this is what we're seeing. Just making sure that everybody is doing good quality compressions and we're we're rocking and rolling on helping save a life.

SPEAKER_03:

That's some deep shit, yeah, for real, for real. So, like, out of all that, I know for sure that it gotta be some type of um like um it gotta be some type of um support system that right you do depend on or or right rely on. You know, like when things get rough and tense.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh yeah. Um dark humor.

SPEAKER_03:

Dark humor?

SPEAKER_04:

Dark humor. It helps.

SPEAKER_02:

Real?

SPEAKER_04:

Oh at like at the one of my favorite like a lot of starts.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

Tell me how I'm supposed to breathe in the air.

SPEAKER_06:

Right, right.

SPEAKER_04:

Um it's it's wrong in the moment, but then later on, there are things like PTSD or you know, just thinking about the moment where there's a DOA and it was because of a car accident, but now the wife is on scene and she's seeing her husband who was tragically taken.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay.

SPEAKER_04:

And it it stays in your head. So, like, you're kind of replaying that moment over and over. Well, you have to talk to somebody about it.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

Like it's not stuff that you should be seeing as a human, but people need first responders and EMS in general to help them. We're the first ones when they call for for assistance, whether it's you know, like I I just fell and I can't get back up. To my husband is having chest pain and then suddenly he goes unconscious.

SPEAKER_06:

Uh okay.

SPEAKER_04:

Um, or I just got stabbed.

SPEAKER_03:

And I'll mention that I got stabbed before and then went to jail. So, you know, that's crazy. But now I mean, what do people get? I mean, like, I mean, I had a question for you too far as like being a person's bond.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, here. Well, going back to like the support system, there's things out there for people. So I know like around here, right? There's like debriefing. So there's people that will come out there and it's a support system where you can talk about, you know, the the call and what happened, and yeah, it's definitely something that you can't really unsee.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

But they can talk to you and you go to therapy, and people that are your peers, your co-workers, they experience it too. So you're kind of in it together.

SPEAKER_03:

Oh, okay. So now you've been doing this for how long now?

SPEAKER_04:

Um over three years.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, now I could I I remember you telling me about we But I've been in healthcare for 10. Yeah. Now I'm talking about when you started the the EMS class and everything, kinda you're telling me about it. Now, my question is when you first seen a body like that, how did you react to it though? Cause me personally now I done had people down my arm before, you know, and and it hit me hard. So my question is, how did you react to it? You know, like being an EMS, a paramedic, a persponder.

SPEAKER_04:

I think the the first one that I saw because uh well working in healthcare for ten years, right? I've I've seen a dead body or two. Right. But I think in EMS you see more of the the gruesome where like this one lady, she it was a head-on collision and we had taken her out.

SPEAKER_02:

For real?

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah, it was I mean, she was damn near decapitated.

SPEAKER_02:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

It was but I think I had just You have to shut it off in that moment. It's only also it like it you understand that this was somebody's mother, sister, um wife, yeah, whoever.

SPEAKER_06:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04:

And they're a person, so you you're respectful of that. Right and you give them as much dignity as you can. But I also tend to look at things like a puzzle. As soon as I can start like piecing together like how I can help or like make this situation better, right? That helps me in kind of putting the the empathy side out of my head or the sympathy side where you know, like I don't want to let my emotions get the best of me.

SPEAKER_03:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

Because they're hurting, they're scared. I mean if they're dead, uh totally that happens and then I can cry and you know it's it's okay. But in that moment, you have to be their supporter, you have to be their rock. So if you're showing a bunch of emotion and like you know, you're screaming, I'm screaming, we're all scared together, that's not gonna help anything.

SPEAKER_03:

So have you ever cried at a crime scene? I mean, at a scene like that before?

SPEAKER_04:

No.

SPEAKER_03:

You never?

SPEAKER_04:

No, and that's weird because I'm a crier.

SPEAKER_03:

You're a crier. I am a crier. I don't believe that. Wow. I don't think that's kind of fascinating though.

SPEAKER_04:

Um when I'm happy, I cry.

SPEAKER_03:

Wow. But but you're not from here. So why do you you from uh originally from where? I mean, from Atlanta or something like that?

SPEAKER_04:

I I was born in Morris. I was born in Minnesota. Right, okay.

SPEAKER_03:

Okay, right, right. I knew there weren't states down there.

SPEAKER_04:

So And then I came back. Um So a medicine Do you ever find it hard to you know, like switch from being a paramedic and then coming home with so far I haven't. Right. I mean, there's been days where I'm like, this really sucks. I have shit on my pants and it's not mine. I need to like take a shower and calm down before I I see any children.

SPEAKER_03:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

It's like you guys need to leave me alone for just like two seconds.

SPEAKER_03:

Right, I feel it. I feel it, I feel it.

SPEAKER_04:

So I think I can shut it off pretty good. I know some people can't, but I think it's just you gotta find what works for you. What is your coping skill, the mechanism that you need? Like even nurses at the end of a long shift where you're short staffed, and it just sucked. Find what works for you. You know, whether that's having like a glass of wine after work, whether that's like reading a book, where everyone just leaves you the fuck alone for 30 minutes so that you can just be impressed.

SPEAKER_03:

I feel that. I really feel that. I really feel that. So, you know, before we went on, I told you that this a dialogue. Now you now you you know me. Now it anything that because we haven't seen each other talked in a while, but is anything that you want to ask me or how things are going with me or or like whatever it is?

SPEAKER_04:

I was kind of wondering like why why you decided to do a podcast, like just start talking to people, or like honestly. I mean, I know when we had talked, right, I'm a single mom. I work in EMS, I'm busy.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

Busy girl.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

There's like things that I've gone through that I've told other people in the same situation that have helped them, like my experiences will help them.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

So is that kind of like your goal? Or what are you trying to what are you doing?

SPEAKER_03:

So this started a couple years ago, honestly. It's been in my mind. Uh it's like, as you know, a lot of people come to me at uh it's like a lot of people they come to me for advice and and things like that. And then I'll tell you what to do. No, no, no, no, not for real. Not for real. Not for real, though. But uh it's like, I'm like, man, one day I'll get my head cut, I'm like, I might be able to start a podcast. Yeah. And my bob like, go on do it. And I and then I was just and I was just like putting it off. I'll procrastinating, procrastinating, procrastinating. And then I'm like, man, one day I was on TikTok. And they were selling the microphones and everything I needed. I'm gonna go on by.

SPEAKER_04:

You got these from the TikTok shop?

SPEAKER_03:

Not all of it.

SPEAKER_04:

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_03:

Not all of it, but the uh first set, that's why I Right. That that's why I don't buy now tick. That shit sitting over there in the corner. Oh TikTok shop. TikTok shop. Yeah, but I spent like around about I spent some money on this here. If you know it, I got all type of stuff over there, you know what I'm saying? So, but at the same time, though I'm like, yeah, go on here, then my friend, like, by me being from Chicago, I got stories. Sometimes it don't be about the story. I want this platform to be where it reached people and then they'll be able to see things and then understand things, you know, like how life really is out here. And and and it's like that'd be the goal of it. I'm not in for, I'm not into it for fame, but if it comes, I'm gonna accept it. Like, if you notice, I start putting a lot of stuff out on TikTok. I'm not on TikTok, but on Facebook now. Trying to go viral, you know. I'm I'm I'm gonna try and put a platform on.

SPEAKER_04:

Sunday morning.

SPEAKER_03:

Sunday morning. But it's but one thing about me, it'd be real talk. I'm not gonna I keep it real. Hey, okay. Hey, hey, hey, hey, you know, hey, that's just me. I I'm sorry, you know. I'm like, for real? She's gonna say that to me on a Sunday morning. But now though, it's kind of funny though. But now though, it's like I really like it though. You know, at first, like when I got I stopped procrastinating. Then I had my gas got on me like I I gotta put one out like every week. And I'm doing that now. And then one day I got online, I saw I sent my audience, yeah, we'll see. London, I mean, uh, I mean, like I said, Philippines, Germany, India. I'm like, wow. Now that I know people and people know me, I can spread the love. You know, and and then it's like I want people to see the world, you know, like like you, you're a paramedic. A lot of people don't know paramedics, you know what I'm saying? A lot of people don't know the issues that the trauma that paramedics and person respondents and doctors know that they go through.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, it it's it's not even just like the the stress of the job.

SPEAKER_06:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

And I saw something today where it had said, you know, like each call could be your last.

SPEAKER_03:

For real?

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

Wow.

SPEAKER_04:

I mean, there's there's distra there's distracted drivers, there's patients that come into the back with us. I mean EMS has started to even wear like body cams and bulletproof vests. Because we just don't know. I've had people not want to come into the back of my truck with me because they think that I'm affiliated with the cops and I'm not.

SPEAKER_03:

But see, you know something dope.

SPEAKER_04:

You can tell me that you've been drinking and smoking and I I do not care. You do you boo.

SPEAKER_03:

That's crazy when they don't want to snitch. That's crazy that they don't want to come into the paddle. Hold on, they turned you down for not going into the truck? Like, for real.

SPEAKER_04:

I think that they're gonna get in trouble.

SPEAKER_03:

Wow, I can't believe that.

SPEAKER_04:

Or look, even if they if they took something like narcotics. Right. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

Damn.

SPEAKER_04:

I've told you, look at the jail roster. You'd be surprised.

SPEAKER_03:

Hey, I don't do that though. You know, I don't do that.

SPEAKER_04:

Look, just scroll.

SPEAKER_03:

But no, that's kind of crazy though, but I totally understand it. I mean, like, I mean, honestly, me, no, I mean, you're my buddy and you know how I told. If you told me to get in the back of a truck to help me out to put them off on the back of my arm to get my the uh what it's called, the blood pressure, I'm gone. That made no sense. Like, I'm trying to say your life. You're trying to save my life, rather. I'm not finna sit there and be like, no, you might tell on me. I mean, they can't do nothing to you because it's inside you.

SPEAKER_04:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

Like, come on now. I mean, people are so crazy nowadays.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, they think that, you know, once they get checked out at the hospital, then the cops are gonna find them and then they're gonna get arrested.

SPEAKER_03:

But for what though?

SPEAKER_04:

I mean I don't know.

SPEAKER_03:

They they they slow. They slow.

unknown:

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03:

But yeah, though, I'm I mean, that's all I've been doing, though. I work hard, come home, get on my podcast, cook me something to eat. Take a shower, go to bed. You know, and that's about it. I mean, it's like a lot has changed for me, you know, back from like last time you seen where we talk. I don't even go around nobody no more. I just go around my regular people. Pops and my guys from MOB, you know what I'm saying? So, and we all trying to, and look, we all try to make history. And you see, we got merch and everything, you know.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, and I had I told you for like a while ago, um, you know, there's what did I say? There was there's good time friends and then there's good friends.

SPEAKER_03:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

There's your ride or die friends.

SPEAKER_03:

Right.

SPEAKER_04:

And I don't know.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah. We're not gonna talk about that though. We don't no, no, you're right. You're right. I know. You're right. You know what's on the though. You're right. You're right. But you know, so it's crazy though. You know how it's just like, you know, and I'm kind of mad at myself on how I came, you know, to a lot of situations that could have been avoided. But it is what it is, though. Is anything else that you would like to know though? I mean, like, I'm not saying go back. I'll call that Baltimore, I'll call that Harry Potter. You know, that's that's like something I don't talk about. So I don't know.

SPEAKER_04:

We might have to bring that up in part two, because this one was kind of uh Yeah, I know, I know. This one's on the spot.

SPEAKER_03:

Yeah, and that's my fault too. Hey, that's what now I was so geek though, like, I'm not gonna send that. I gotta cut that. I gotta cut let me pause it right quick. Yeah, but you're right though. This was like a uh spread of moments fast type thing though. But it is gonna be a part two. So I need you to come back now.

unknown:

I might.

SPEAKER_03:

I get it. Wow, you try to get down on me, man. With a sweet one, I might. But no though, I mean I I really enjoyed you being here. I really enjoyed you coming through talking on Bap Talk. You know and I wanna say thank y'all for listening, tuning in. Stay tuned next time, part two. We're fine shit, Madison