Sami Zayn Didn’t Need This… Melo Did.

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Sami Zayn wins again… but this one doesn’t sit right.

Sami beating Carmelo Hayes might’ve just cost Melo his WrestleMania moment. Sami vs Trick Williams is already money, it didn’t need a title attached to it. Meanwhile, Melo is the one who actually needed that spotlight to even get on the card.

And then you’ve got Jelly Roll all over the show… and somehow beating Kit Wilson clean. No distraction. No protection. Just straight up loss. That’s a weird call.

Randy Orton and Cody Rhodes absolutely lost their minds in a pull-apart brawl, which at least felt like WrestleMania energy.

Danhausen continues to steal every second he’s on screen, because of course he does.

And Jade Cargill? She went after Rhea Ripley again… and it’s starting to feel like this is heading somewhere big.

This episode had moments… but some of these decisions? They’re gonna have people talking for the wrong reasons.

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Transcript

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Up according to my watch, it's the time of year where Sami Zayn takes the spot of a mid-carter who needs a spot at WrestleMania. Two years ago, it was two. He took Chad Gable's spot and then beat Gupter for the Intercontinental title. And this year, well, he took Carmelo Hayes' spot and beat him for the US title. Alright, this is your one take, one shot SmackDown review, where I do it immediately following SmackDown so you get my raw visceral reaction. And there's no cuts. So if a bunch of bees come in here and sting me, better hope I'm not allergic. Alright, I guess a couple questionable decisions today. Jelly roll beat a professional wrestler clean. And and and then Sami Zayn took took the belt off of Carmelo Hayes. Now there were shenanigans involved. Trick Williams did come out and cost Carmelo the title by he punched him. He punched him in the face, which was the same thing that happened earlier in the night when Lash punched Alexa Bliss. So they did the same exact finish twice. And and but this one cost cost Carmelo the title and Sammy won. And that means Sammy and Trick are actually gonna go to WrestleMania face each other for this title. If you want to win this title, all you gotta do is comment below. No, for real. Let's pause the video. I am gonna give away this title on my shoulder. All you gotta do is subscribe and comment. Like I said, you can win. Oh, it hurts. It's it's pointy. I always forget. For some reason, I always forget, but but for real, you can win it. Just subscribe and comment. All right, so how do we feel about this? Now, if this was leading towards a triple threat, I'd be a little more forgiving. But they've already done the match card. We've already seen that it's it's Sammy versus Trick. Now they could always change it. They could add, they could add Carmelo Hayes next week, and then it would it would lessen, it would lessen my dislike of this title, this title switch. But honestly, I really think I would have just gone with Trick and Sammy. No title. They didn't need a title. Trick Williams didn't need to have a title match at WrestleMania. I mean, it's great, it's cool. I'm very happy that Trick is about to become the US champion, fingers crossed. But at the same time, I think they could have not had the title and still had a cool little promo, a cool little battle, cute, cool little feud. I mean, everything that I've seen between these two so far, Sammy and Trick, like it was interesting without a title. Carmelo Hayes could kind of use the title to get on the card. Like, so I just I just didn't see it. I didn't see a reason why Trick or why why why Carmelo Hayes had to lose, had to lose this. Sammy and Trick were doing fine without the US title involved. So, like, what do you think? What do you think? Am I like, am I overreacting here or or am I just because Carmelo's my guy? Because I was really liking this Sami Zayn. I was liking the direction of Sami Zayn, crash out Sammy, just you know, just in his own head, but now he's back to oh, see, look, I'm the champion. This is WrestleMania main eventor Sami Zayn, and I don't really like WrestleMania main eventor Sami Zayn. I like I like Sami Zayn who's like conniving and everything. Now he did take advantage of Carmelo Hayes because, like, you know, again, Trick Williams punched him. So, I mean, the story makes sense. I'm not gonna say it doesn't make sense, but again, I just don't think we had to take the belt off Trick Williams. And I also don't think we had to let Kit Will uh Kit Wilson lose clean. Now he was cursed by Dan Housen before the match, but like I don't understand why a professional wrestler in Jelly Roll, who who has had one match before, why we had to let Jelly Roll beat him clean. I'm not saying don't beat Kit Wilson. All I'm saying is that we could have done, we could have done this one needed shenanigans for Kit to lose. We should have legit had mid-match Dan Hausen come out with his shirt cannon, his shirt cannon, and just start shooting off uh shirts because he actually has a shirt cannon and they they usually do it during the commercial break on Raw. Just have him do that, that distracts that distracts Kit Wilson and Jelly Roll pins him. I gotta say though, I will give props to Jelly Roll. This was actually a decent match, one-on-one. He didn't have a tag partner to hide his weaknesses. So, like, I give props for Jelly Roll, major props for Kit Wilson for carrying the match, but like overall the match was good. I just don't like that a celebrity beat a professional wrestler without shenanigans. Like I said, the the shirt cannon could have solved everything, and then Kit could have been still mad at, still mad at uh at Danhausen and and Jelly Roll. And is this I I was thinking that this was gonna lead to a a Danhausen Jelly Roll matchup against Kit and the Miz, but I'm not so sure anymore because Jelly Roll took an RKO today. He took an RKO, and so I'm wondering if this was it for Jelly Roll. And if this was it, then then I'm scratching my head a little. I think we should have protected Kit Wilson just a little bit. Now, some people are gonna be like, oh, Kit was fine. This was the biggest match of his career, all that stuff. And I'm not saying it's not, I'm just saying, just saying we could have protected him just a little bit, just a little bit. And yeah, so let's just go over SmackDown in general. It wasn't I wasn't like enthralled with this show. Like, we're at minute 42. At 842, we've had uh Randy Orton came out and he got hit with a microphone. He got hit with a microphone from Zach Ryder, and we had one tag team match. That took 42 minutes. I'm like, okay, okay, fine. This is this is SmackDown. Now, I don't understand why we have people like Apollo Crews just sitting and catering, but we can have a 30-minute tag team match that has no real consequences. It's like just cut that match in half and and write a story for Apollo Cruz. And and that goes for everybody, and that goes for everybody. Just give everybody a storyline. So we start off, Randy comes out, and Randy mentions that he has voices in his head about 83 times. I think I think every promo involving Randy up until WrestleMania uh 42 night one is gonna be I have voices in my head. Now I listen to the voices in my head, and the voices in my head say that I need to be the old Randy who would listen to my voices in my head. I get it, Randy. You have you have voices in your head. So he says that. Randy rolls out of the ring, they awkwardly stare at each other as officials say, Don't, Zach, don't. And that was pretty much it. We then go to a tag team match. It's the Bellas versus versus Charlotte and Alexa, and they they start off, but then Lash and Naya come out. I feel that we should have had Lash and Naya cut an actual promo while the match itself was happening and not before the match. I think that would have made it a little bit interesting, distracting, but interesting in a good way. They sit down, they get involved. Like I said, Lash will punch, will punch Alexa, which will then allow the Bellas to pin her. They then there's a beatdown, and Lyra and Bailey, they come out and attack uh uh uh Lash and and Lash and Naya. It was a little awkward seeing seeing Lyra just completely own Naya Jax. I don't think I don't think they should have done that. But eventually this will probably be your four matches, your four teams at WrestleMania. And yeah, it was just a beatdown. And then when it was all said and done, Charlotte pushed pushed down Nikki or Bella, or Nikki or or or Bree pushed her down and said, you know, that's pretty much for taking advantage of Alexa Bliss. And so so yeah, you know, okay, I guess, I guess, I guess. Uh uh Randy gets upset and says that the voices, if you don't, if you don't give me a match with Zach Ryder, then the voices are going to are going to tell me to do things and I can't be held accountable. And then Nick's like, well, okay, I guess I gotta give you a match, even though Matt Cardona has a cast on him, which is kind of cool. I wish they would have, I wish somebody would have said this on on commentary. You know, he fought, Randy fought Zach with the cast, but his dad, Bob Orton, used to fight with the cast. So it's like we could have said something about that, but no one said anything. The uh Jelly Roll, he was throughout the entire show. At one point, our truth is trying to rebuild the judgment day, the judgment day uh clubhouse, which is hilarious, with Damian Priest. And then Rhea comes, they're like, Yes, we got this, we're gonna do it. Then Jelly Roll pops in to tell tell Rhea that you know you gotta beat up, you gotta beat up Jay Cargill. And bonus points, no one said the B word today. The the the the feud has moved on from just being the B word, and Jelly Roll hypes her up, Jelly Roll hypes up Zach Ryder later, too, and like he was just all he jelly roll was the thread throughout the show. And so uh R-Truth mistakes, mistakes, jelly roll as Dominic Mysterio. You know, he's just classic R-Truth, and they they they leave. Rhea goes to the ring and she says, I can't believe you BFAF and Meecham stoop down to Jade's level. And I'm thinking to myself, why wouldn't they stoop down to their level? Jade and Meachum are the lowest on the card, and now they're in a main event program. Like, that's a good career decision. And so Jade comes out after Rhea calls him out, and we have B Fab and Meachum. They start talking about how Rhea, you know, gets all the credit, all this stuff. Uh and Rhea's like, oh, that's rich. How about we have a match? BFAB, let's go. Or I think Jade actually said B Fab, let's go. The match lasted all of a minute before they just went and did a beatdown. Now I think we should have added to this because when it was all said and done, they did the exact same thing they did last week. You know, the numbers game took advantage. We did a uh Jade's move, and that was it. She and then she talked some smack. I like this pairing though. I think Meechum, Meechum really stood out as a heel to me. I really liked Meechum here, and I really hope that she keeps this energy. I know they're gonna be the job squad for for Jade for a while, but I hope when when Meechum is allowed to spread her wings and and go off that this is the character because I saw a lot of potential. She has a really mean face when she's trying to have it, so like I want to see more of this from Meechum. Because I I didn't have any kind of like feelings about Mechum whatsoever. I didn't like her, I didn't hate her before, but today I noticed her. So that was that was pretty cool. And then, but yeah, Rhea got beat up again. What else we got here? Then we did the jelly roll kit stuff. Uh before that, we did have Miz say how he's like he's really having bad weeks, stepped in some gum, all these things. And Kit Wilson's like, do you think it's the the curse? I don't know why we're having we're having the Miz just say he's been having a bad week. Why don't we show that he's having a bad week? We need to that's I have a bug zapper in my house. That was uh that was a bug zap. I would cut that out. I would 100% cut that out. But uh guys can think I have fleas and stuff, but and I do itch a lot. Maybe I do have fleas. I get so distracted. If I can just go without a distraction, then I can do a review. But once I'm distracted, it's like, how do I get back to that review? What was I talking about? Oh, the Miz, the Miz. Like, we should be showing the Miz having these things, bad things happen to him. Not just, oh, my packages got uh sent to India. You know, we we need to see, see this stuff. Not just, don't just tell us, let us see it. But the Miz says to Kit, I'm gonna stay here. And then Kit with David House is like, How do I get in? How do I get to be his mentor or mentee? And that's when he got cursed. And we already talked about it. Think kit should have been distracted. I don't, but the but yeah, it was whatever. So Sokoa, he apologized to Tamatonga, and time and he was like, See, Roman, Roman wouldn't apologize, so I'm better than Roman. And then and then Carmelo says to Tama, you're gonna step up. Tama leaves, and then and then suddenly there's Shinsuke, and Shinsuke says something, probably saying you're gonna step up, and then tall tonga is there. It's like, is this a story? Is this what we is this story? Is this interesting to anybody? Because I'm just like, okay, just a bunch of like guy A, guy B, take him away. This guy shows up, da da. We just okay, talk, talk, talk, talk, talk. Then we have the the Carmelo Hayes Sami Zay match was good. And then we said Trick was already out there, cost of the match, and I don't like I don't like that Carmelo Hayes loss. I just don't, I don't. Drew McIntyre, Jacob Fatu. They both, Jacob goes to the ring, Drew comes out, they're yelling at each other. You try to take food off my kids' plate. Drew says, I don't care about your kids. Jacob's about to come out, and then Nick says, Nick, Nick Aldous comes out and says, Before you guys fight, the you guys can have a match at Mania and it'll be unsanctioned. I mean, cool, I guess. I remember when it was like you would have to have weeks of build-up, weeks of build-up for an unsanctioned match, right? But this was just one smackdown. One smackdown where they fought each other uh uh constitutes for a uh unsanctioned match. Old man yelling at a cloud. I like I like stories that are actually stories, not just episodes. One, oh, one episode happened and now we have like an unsanctioned match. Yeah. It'll be fine. It'll be fine. Drew McIntyre, Jacob, they're great, they'll make it work. And Tiffany lost to Julia. That was really surprising. Now, Chelsea Green is trying to get uh pal up with Tiffany. I kind of want to see that. I do kind of want to see that, but I don't know if we need more tag teams right now in the women's division. But Tiffany lost to Julia pretty much clean. There was a moment where Keanu James went on the steps and that distracted Tiffany for about like for like a minute uh a second and a half, and that second and a half allowed Julia to get her feet up when she did the prettiest moonsault ever. But Julia won. Honestly, that was a surprise. I mean, I would say that was like 99% a clean, clean. And then Matt Cardona gets beat by Randy Oren. Nothing special here, just he just pretty much gets beat. Then Cody Rhodes shows up, and the I'm so sick of these pull-apart brawls where it's just 800 security guards. Just why do the security guard like there's even a hint of like these guys are gonna go at it, the security just run out there, and the officials just run out there. I've seen I've seen Jason Jordan so many times this year. He's one of the backstage for news serves. It's like just let him go. Like, we don't have to do this every week. But it's a pull-apart brawl between Randy and between Randy and Randy and Cody Rhodes. And eventually, the the story here, they do this for about, I think it was about like eight minutes, basically just beating up security guards and then fighting each other. And the story is eventually they get pushed to the corners, and then jelly roll comes out. Well, I tell you, he's the he's a thread throughout the night. Jelly roll comes out and he's like, What are you doing, Randy? What are you doing, Randy? He's your friend, and then co and then he goes to Cody, Randy or RKO's jelly roll, he runs out of the ring laughing, and that's the end with Cody oh looking over uh jelly roll. What how many chops am I gonna give it? One, two, three, four, five. I'll give it six chops, I'll give it six chops, six point five, maybe like a six point five chops. It was I don't know. I I don't really feel it was anything like must see TV. If if you have to go see some segments, I would definitely watch the Kit Wilson jelly roll stuff. That was that was entertaining. It really was. Kit Wilson just gets his character, and even the Sammy Zayn stuff is fine, and Trick Williams, Trick Williams, I forgot to say this. Trick is such I such a I love Trick. Early in the night, Trick was told that you're gonna have a WrestleMania match. And Sammy, before he won the title, was like, what about me? And and Sammy and Trick said or uh Nick all this said no, and then and then he's like Trick made fun of him, and then when Sammy came back, Trick was like, catering's that way, Sammy, and then he punched him in the face. So Trick is just anything trick, watch it. And I guess, I guess anything jelly roll tonight, watch it. Trick and Jelly Roll, the all stars, and Kit Wilson, the all stars of SmackDown tonight. But yeah, a 6.5 on the Chop O meter. Boys, girls, let me know what your chops, how many chops you give it out of 10. See you bye.