Gen-Xpertise

Ep 39: "Strictly For The Ladies"

• Maine and Rance • Season 1 • Episode 39

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 In this episode, we take a look at the evolving state of women in America through the lens of health, education, careers, and relationships. From life expectancy and college graduation rates to workforce participation, income trends, and marriage statistics, we break down some of the numbers shaping the experiences of women today and what those trends may mean for families, communities, and the future. 


Intro and Outro music by Erin Garris and Khari Garris

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SPEAKER_00

Yo, yo, yo, what it is, what it was, what's it gonna be? Welcome. Welcome to the latest episode of the Gen Expertise Podcast, episode 39, strictly for the ladies. We are your host, Maine and Reds, aka Two Old Men in the Podcast, yo. You know what I'm saying? I had to say that kind of provocative. You're strictly for the ladies.

SPEAKER_02

You gotta say it with a deep, you gotta go deeper with your voice.

SPEAKER_00

I know. I actually I should have let you say it, chill. Yeah, that's it. Took me for the ladies. There you go. You got more of a red a radio friendly voice than I do. What's up, my brother? I'm good, man. How's everything? Everything is good, but before we even start, you see my man has the New York Knicks cap on. My man is wearing the Knicks hat today. Gotta jump on it.

SPEAKER_02

You don't have to jump on that bandwagon.

SPEAKER_00

At the time of this taping, we have swept the Philadelphia 76ers. Shout out to my peoples out there in Philly. No disrespect. But we swept them. We got that 30-point game four sweep of the Philadelphia 76ers. New York was in the building, outside of the building, around the building, on top of the building. Chopped cheese over cheesesteaks. You know what I'm saying? All of that, sir. I like that.

SPEAKER_02

Chopped cheese over cheese steaks. I like that a lot.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, so we're back in the Eastern Conference Finals. I have to say that because I'm a New York Knicks diehard fan to the bone. You know, they break my heart every year, but I keep coming back for more. I know they might break my heart, but I love them too much. So shout out to my Knicks. Appreciate it. Appreciate it. Jalen Brunson, Kat, all you boys, Rages, OG, Mitch. Y'all did your thug thizzle.

SPEAKER_02

Absolutely. You know me. I'm just a fan of all things New York. I'm not even really a sports fan, to be honest. Yeah, especially when we're winning. I'm a fan of all things New York, especially if we're winning.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, especially if we win it. The hats. He got the hats lined up, sir. You know what I'm saying? Whatever, whatever season who's winning, he got the Jets. It's the Jets, it's the Mets, it's the Yeds, it's it's whatever, yo.

SPEAKER_02

Wait till the wait till the Rangers, wait till the Rangers start start winning something.

SPEAKER_00

I'm I'm Lane is a fanatic mercenary for hire, baby.

SPEAKER_02

But only for New York, though. Anything New York.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, that's it. Only for the Knicks, yo. So shout out to my Knicks. Hopefully, you know, you know, we always say maybe next year, maybe this year is finally next year. So we'll see. We had still got another round to get through. Hopefully, we can get through there. We can take it to the chip.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

And who knows, son? You know what I mean? That Timberland boot might have a little extra glitter on it this year.

SPEAKER_02

That would be crazy. I can't even imagine New York if the Knicks win a chip.

SPEAKER_00

They will tear the city apart.

SPEAKER_02

I think so. I think so. I think it would be it would get it would probably be dangerous out there. We probably want to be home watching that one.

SPEAKER_00

I can't even lie, bro. I might I I can't I don't know what I'm gonna do, son. After I stop crying, you know what I'm saying? After the tears come down, son, I don't know what I'm gonna do. I'm I'm I'm I might just run the streets like Frank the tank, B.

SPEAKER_02

I wonder how crazy it would be in Manhattan, especially. Oh, it's gonna be over the 34th. By the garden, especially, it would be pandemonium.

SPEAKER_00

Yo, crazy, son. Crazy.

SPEAKER_01

Well, let's see what happens.

SPEAKER_00

We'll see what happens, man. We'll see what happens. Hopefully, we can at least get to the championship this year. And happy days are here again, son. We haven't won. I don't think we've won a chip since 73. Neither one of us was born.

SPEAKER_02

In our lifetime.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, we came real close in 94. Um, but John Starks wants to go two for 14. But you know what I'm saying? That's a whole different story. We love John Starks, but he shot us out of that. But you know, we went back in 99, but we weren't, we weren't, we were ill prepared to win. So, you know, this this hopefully we can get there, man. You know, blue star blue skies are here again, so absolutely. Listen, yeah, man. But strictly for the ladies, so at the taping of this, it is still Mother's Day. So happy Mother's Day to the ladies out there. Happy Mother's Day to everyone that's listening, all of these ladies out there. You know, we are, after all, we are the sons of a woman. We are the husbands of women, we are the fathers of women, I'm the brother of a woman, we're grandsons of women, we're male cousins of women. We got some skin and stake in the game too. You know what I mean? So we appreciate you.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, absolutely. Happy Mother's Day to all the mothers out there and all the mother figures out there as well.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, yes, yeah, that's very important. All of those mothers that are stepping in as mothers, yeah. You know what I mean, doing those jobs. So we appreciate you. Thank you. We got a little episode for you guys today. It's only right. Disclaimer, we are two men.

SPEAKER_02

In case you were wondering.

SPEAKER_00

I think you better elaborate on the disclaimer because I feel like no, because you know, we sometimes you know the women don't always want us speaking about them or for them. So we gotta we gotta put that disclaimer out there. Give us some grace. Give us some grace. I got you, I got you. You know what I'm saying? Give us some grace.

SPEAKER_02

This is strictly like a like almost like an ode or like a some like a tribute or homage, if you will. It's not like don't think of it as us speaking on their behalf or or or you know, jumping in on things that we have no business. Think of it as homage.

SPEAKER_00

That's right. That's right, you know, because couches are very uncomfortable.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, that's true. I'm my wife is definitely listening to this. My mother listens to this. Yes, my mother listens to this as well. My wife listens to us. Gotta make sure we love you. It's appropriate. Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00

You know, we we we love you. So today we're just gonna talk about some things. It's kind of like when we went back to our earlier episode when we were just giving facts and figures about the men.

SPEAKER_02

Sure.

SPEAKER_00

So we're just gonna talk about some things on the female side. Some things that we see, some things we appreciate, some things that we notice, and just some general facts.

SPEAKER_02

Um one thing that I do have some documents. Um, I might be wrong about this, but I don't think women like being referred to as females nowadays. Like I No. I I I don't think I don't think so. I could be wrong. Yeah, I just want to mention that. I'm not gonna be referring to women as females. I I for some reason I I don't think that's that's appropriate anymore. Yeah, it was kind of like a cat call of the 90s, right? I don't know, man. I I just feel like it it it refers to it, it's not it's kind of dehumanizing a little bit. Like like we're men and they're women. Yes. So I don't know. I guess I guess you're right.

SPEAKER_00

I think it's like we're gonna be called the males.

SPEAKER_02

You know what I'm saying? Yeah, like it it kind of dehumanizes people a little bit when you when you refer to them in that way, I think. Um I would have to look it up to get more more into detail, but I think it's a little bit um outdated for for you to call them females. It sounds you know, sounds a little bit misogynist.

SPEAKER_00

Like nineties rap?

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's like 90s rap.

SPEAKER_00

All right then, ladies and women and significant others.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

All right, well, there you go. So we'll be talking about some things today. And I I you know, one of the things I do want to start off with though is uh because we we're big on health as well, and I'm especially big on health, uh uh like some of the health stats that are out there that I came across as I was I was researching the ladies. And one of the things that I that I I I I can't say that I didn't realize, like I I feel like I've always known this. Um but I came across it again is that heart disease is the number one killer of women, and they say one in five women may will die of heart disease, and more women die of heart disease than all cancers combined.

SPEAKER_02

So that that second part I didn't know, but I did know about the um the heart disease being uh the number one. Um it's interesting, man, because we we talked about this with with the men before. Like you said, in the earlier episode, we talked about like kind of like the the top four or five things that men are more likely to to die from. And it feels like it's women are not that far off. Yeah. Um but yeah, that's that's an interesting one. I did I didn't know that that it was it was kind of um it was above all the cancers, you know. Yeah. There's a numbers. I I I had no idea about that. So that's an interesting one.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Especially once you get uh to 45 to 65, like it really ramps up.

SPEAKER_01

Right.

SPEAKER_00

You know what I mean? But I I and also in men, just in general, because I always say we all have to go from something, either your heart goes out or you get some type of uh disease or sickness or something. But once they get to the age of forty-five to sixty-five, the the risk goes up. So one in five women out there, heart disease is the number one killer. I if you would probably just stop anybody random off the street, you would they would probably think like it would be breast cancer or something. I would assume.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

You know, just any random person off the street, they would assume that.

SPEAKER_02

But heart health. It feels like heart health is more associated with men, to be honest. Just like anecdotally, right? Like so, like you said, if I was to stop somebody, or somebody stop me in the street, really. Like, I think I would be more likely to say breast cancer or something like that, because it feels like that is more um talked about, you know, when it comes to women's health. And also when it comes to heart disease, people talk about that a lot more when it comes to men's health. Heart health seems to be like at the forefront when it comes to men's health.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. That that was crazy. And then I have some more stats where they're women are two times more likely to experience depression. Uh forty-one point three percent of women age twenty and up uh are considered obese. So that's a BMI body mass index of 30 plus. 44.6% of women 18 and above suffer from hypertension, which would explain the high risk of heart failure, one to five, when they when they start experiencing hypertension at such an early age. And 28% of women in general report high stress. Health-wise, that is tough.

SPEAKER_02

This is interesting. So this is also interesting because we talked about this a little bit before. Women tend to be the ones to kind of push men to go to the doctor.

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_02

And these stats don't exactly align with a person that that has that type of concern. You know what I mean? Or maybe it's that women tend to be the kind of the caregivers and the nurturers and the person that's like so busy worried about other people. And this and I and I guess this is kind of a stereotype, I guess. But I feel like it's a positive stereotype if there if there can be one. But it feels like, even in my experience, women are more likely to be the people to push you to take care of yourself and to be the ones that are caring for everybody in the family, like right. Like your mom is more likely to be the person that's kind of taking care of all the appointments for the kids.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Making sure that that their husband is going to the doctor and stuff like that, right? Making sure that they call the doctor, making sure they're following up. If you have any tests coming up or if you have any results that you're waiting for. They seem to be the ones that are more dil diligent about that type of thing. So it's kind of surprising sometimes when you hear the stats on their own health. But I guess it makes sense when you kind of correlate the fact that they are the caregivers and naturers of everybody else, that that could lead to a a problem where you're not really taking care of yourself the way you should be, right? Like you're you're ignoring your own needs because you're so busy worried about other people's needs, right?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Um and when you like having two very small children, myself, you real you really see it. Like one of the things that you take for granted, and I've heard this from a lot of women who have like multiple children at uh at uh close in age, especially when they're younger. One of the big things is that just just being able to eat a hot meal. So they're so busy, like they're making food for everybody, everybody eats, and by the time they get to their plate, the food is cold. You know, they're the ones up at night majority of the time with the babies, making sure that everybody gets to school, making sure everybody's fed, making sure that their significant other and their husbands are going to the doctor and taking care of themselves, that sometimes they neglect their own health and wellness. And in my line of work, usually as a personal trainer, if I work with a male, seven times out of 70% of the time, I'm hired by their wife or their girlfriend.

SPEAKER_02

That's that's actually not that surprising, right? Let me let me let me talk to I'm I'm gonna interrupt you for a second and talk about a couple of stats that I see, right? So um one of the things that that that I wanted to talk about is is married men and the the how marriage actually impacts their health, right? And I don't want to make this about men, but it's really not about men. It's it kind of is, but indirectly, it's really about women and their impact on men, and then how that might lead to what we're talking about in terms of like them all you know not taking as good a care of themselves. But listen to this about marriage.

SPEAKER_00

That was the disclaimer. See, that's why I do the disclaimer in the fact because we're men, so give us some grace.

SPEAKER_02

Absolutely. But no, but but this this shows how how women are basically saving men's lives, literally. So it says um longer life expectancy is is one of the the uh the effects of of being married, right? Like so married men tend to live longer than unmarried men. Uh studies often show lower rates of premature death among married men. Researchers believe this is tied to more consistent health care use, better social support, lower rates of risky behavior, and more stable routines and finances. Marriage is also associated with lower rates of heart disease, faster recovery after illness or surgery, lower rates of substance abuse, better sleep and nutrition in many cases. Um men in stable marriages are also more likely to go to the doctor, take medications consistently, catch health issues early. Um the mental health effects are um women are supportive to men in in terms of depression um and preventing loneliness, chronic stress, and suicide risk. Um so those are just a a a couple of stats like but it but it's kind of it kind of bolsters like what we're talking about here, where women are kind of the not kind of, but they're basically saving everybody else. Yeah. And sometimes at the detriment of their own health, right? Because we've all seen it. Like you've probably seen it in your mom, not just your wife, with with your two kids, but you've probably seen your mom do the same thing. I've seen my mother do the same thing.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Um and I've seen my wife do the same thing, right? Kind of neglect themselves in the name of kind of taking care of everybody else. Sure, that there's there's plenty of guys out there with with with similar examples where they've seen women do this, right? Like they where they're paying so much attention to what everybody else is doing in terms of health and and and taking care of their own their own lives and their own business that women have a tendency to kind of forget about themselves. Yeah, but the stats show, like, you know, men are men are men are less likely to die if they have a woman in the house living with them. And with because when I look at stats on marriage, I also count that as stats on like, you know, just you know, living together. You don't have to be like officially married to have that same benefit. Like if a woman is living with you, if you're living with your girlfriend for multiple years, I'm sure that that woman is is the person that kind of pushes you to go to the doctor when you may you may forget or pushes you to take some medicine that you might have might have forgotten, right? Um stuff like that. Women also have a tendency to beat up people that kind of arrange your social your social life too. Like, because men have a tendency, they don't care, like men don't just sit in the house by themselves or play video games or read a book or whatever the case may be, but women have a tendency to even um worry about your your you know your mental health in that way too, where where they'll make arrangements for you to go out more or for you to to hang out with friends or stuff like that, right? Sometimes they'll call your friends and be like, hey, we gotta get out, we gotta get together, uh, just to make sure that their man or their husband goes out, right? Just to make sure that you're you know you you're keeping those those connections that you may forget, you know.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Yeah. So you guys are very, very important. Big up yourselves, yo. You know what I'm saying? We're bigging you up too. You know, but unfortunately, they're neglecting themselves at the same time. So if if you're married, you have a significant other, these are things to think about, uh, realize just how much they have on their plate and how much they are carrying as well. I'm not I'm gonna be honest, though. I'm not I don't fear much in life, you know, and I'm not trying to be tough or anything. But when my wife tells me, yo, I'm going out, watch the kids, and I gotta be by myself.

SPEAKER_02

That's a scary thought.

SPEAKER_00

That's a scary thought, man. It's when are you when you coming back? You gonna be going long?

SPEAKER_01

You didn't and then it's been and now since you've been gone. And that's too long to come back home.

SPEAKER_02

That song might be about a dad that's home with the kids.

SPEAKER_00

Stuck with a toddler and a dude with buttons you know, two toddlers. You know, I'm begging then I I watch how I watch how she just like maneuvers around a day-to-day with the kids, and I'm like, I'm sorry, Raz. I'm scared.

SPEAKER_02

Think about this Jonasy song for a second. Let's let's hold on a second. Let's retract on this. A quick tangent. In that song, he's like, it's been an hour since you've been gone, and that's too long. So come back home. That sounds like a man left at home with the kids, right? Yes, and that's that doesn't sound like a regular, like just regular, you know, like a couple with no kids.

SPEAKER_00

That's panic.

SPEAKER_02

She's only gone for an hour. But if if she leaves for an hour and I got the kids with with me by myself, that is like, oh, it's been an hour. You since you've been gone. That's a little come back home. That sounds like more like, right? Yo, give that some thought, anybody. Give that some thought. Like rethink that that whole Jodice song for me. Um anyway.

SPEAKER_00

That's me at home, said you can't do anything. I am shook. But they they just, you know, they're just able to just maneuver around it. And and now I wonder, I now I realize I realize why the stress levels are up, the depression rises, and uh, and the heart starts to murmur a little bit and the blood pressure goes up. You know, the lack of sleep.

SPEAKER_02

Cortisol levels are up, your stress hormone is.

SPEAKER_00

Oh my goodness. Oh my goodness, you know? So then you know who's the one that always like worries about you, especially as men. If I was out too late, it was my mother that was worrying about me. My my your father's like, oh, he'd be all right. He'd be out, he'll be back home.

SPEAKER_02

It's funny, man. I had this conversation one time with um with Aaron. For those that don't know, um Aaron Garrus does our music, right? Like, so if you hear you hear the intro and outro music, that's done by um uh a gender of ours, um, Aaron Garrett, right? Like, so a long time ago, him and I had this conversation, and we were talking about, for some reason, we're talking about mothers, right? Like, and this this conversation repeats in my head every once in a while, because he always said, like, your mother's the only person, no matter what you do, pretty much, she's gonna love you unconditionally. And you even if you told her to, you know, go ahead with yourself, she's still gonna love you, and she's still gonna take you back. You know what I mean? Like, and and I'm sure that there's like individual circumstances where people could say that I'm wrong on this, right? Like, maybe I'm overgeneralizing, but for the most part, your mother's the person that's gonna love you unconditionally. She's the she's the woman that's gonna be really in your corner. And Erin used to joke, he was like, Yo, you could damn near, you know, off somebody, and she'll she'll hide you in the house. Yeah, it's a little bit more. She'll let you hide out at her house, and you could be whatever age. And she'll tell the police she ain't seen you, you know. So I thought about that. I'm like, yeah, you're right. Like, like the you know, your mother's the only person that that really, really, really has that love, that unconditional love for you. There's nothing like love between a a mother and child, right? Um But yeah, and like I said, like I'm sure that there's individual circumstances. I know for a fact they're all, but but I'm just saying in a general sense, mothers are the ones that that are really going to be in your corner and seem to have the most the clo what the what I could call the closest thing that I've seen to unconditional love, right?

SPEAKER_00

Mm-hmm. Yeah, because your father will be like, boy, you better go out there and face the music. Don't be bringing no trouble. Don't be bringing no trouble to my house. Don't you be bringing no trouble to my house, boy. You know what I'm saying? You man enough to do it. You man enough to face the consequences. See your mother be like, No, not my baby. Not my baby.

SPEAKER_02

And again, like I know we're overgeneralizing. That feel that same like like unconditional love. Of course they are, but but I'm just saying it, like, in in general. We're we're we're we're we're general. I just want to put that out there. I know we're we're overgeneralizing.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, man. So we but this is strictly for the ladies. Strictly for the ladies.

SPEAKER_01

Are we pandering right now? Are we pandering? I think so.

SPEAKER_00

All right. All right. So since I did do the health stats, I I wanted to go over something else that's healthy for the for the women, which I came across because I'm I'm a big sports and a big health and wellness fan. So sports in general for women improves confidence, improves self-esteem, lowers rates of depression, improves academic performance, develops leadership skills, significantly reduces the risk of long-term health issues like breast cancer and osteoporosis. Um and I got that from the women'sinsport.org. Also, 80% of female Fortune 5 CEOs played youth sports. I did not know that.

SPEAKER_02

I didn't know that either.

SPEAKER_00

I know women always like talk about self-care and they go to the spa or they go, you know, just to get a massage or some peaceful time, which is also good. But you also have to the gym, exercise, find something outside of the house to do. Men will go and we'll join. There'll be like basketball leagues and stuff will join. We'll join like an old touch football league or something. But but if you're athletic, stay athletic. Find something, find something to keep yourself busy, something for you, and then you can go to the to the spa afterwards and get that massage. But the fact that 80% of ma of female Fortune 500 CEOs played youth sport was was staggering to me, especially since only I think I think only 10% of Fortune 500 CEOs are women.

SPEAKER_02

Right, right. And and I was just about to speak on that too, like a little bit when you when you just said that, because it just sparked me to immediately talk about kind of how there's a there's still a disparity in in work environments, corporate environments where women are are paid a a little less than men. Yes. Um like you said, there's there's way less uh women in C-suite and executive roles than there should be when you account for like education levels and experience, um, stuff like that. So yeah, you you just spark me to to think about that when you even mention uh the um you know CEOs of Fortune 500. Um there's still a disparity there.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, yeah. And when you talk about education since we went to the education, women are have earned more bachelor's degrees than men since the 1980s. Yes. And as of 2024, 40% of US women have completed four plus years of college compared to 37% of men.

SPEAKER_02

So why do you think that is, if you had to guess?

SPEAKER_00

I think that females are more focused, to be honest. Women and females. Women I feel women are off more focused, especially when it comes to education, because also from grades K through 12, I wrote this down too. Girls outperform boys in reading and writing, with girls being a full grade level ahead by the end of the eighth grade. So I just in general, I think I think because there's such there aren't a lot of resources for women as an early early age, especially as I go back to sports. Girls, young girls drop out of sports twice as fast as as young boys do. And I think that also has something to do with there weren't there wasn't always a lot of pathways once they played sports. So like a a a kid can grow up and dream of being a baseball player, he can dream of being a football player, he can dream of being a basketball professional basketball player, he can dream of doing all of this. But there hasn't always been these leagues for women. So I think just in general, as well as as well as being focused on just taking care of home, I think there was also just an emphasis on education, because education was the key to get where you wanted to go. Like, okay, you can use uh sport to get into college and get a scholarship, but what are you gonna do after that? For years there was no WNBA here. The WNBA is only like 25 years old. Women would have to go and play overseas, and the money wasn't always great. Um, they weren't. They just started a women's professional baseball league this past year, and then this is the inaugural inaugural year. And I don't know if you remember the young girl who played baseball in the college, the boys' college world series, Monet Davis, I believe.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I do remember.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, she's in her 20s now, and she was one of the first draft picks. She's playing for an LA-based team. So there's all these being an entrepreneur right now. So I think that in the future, especially now, because like I said, there's a professional women's basketball league, there's a professional soccer league, there's I think there's a lacrosse league, there's a baseball league, um, there's women's tennis. You know, there's all types types of leagues and stuff where it was just basically like women's tennis back in the day, where you can play and come up through the through the ranks. I think that has a lot to do with it. So they were pushed more towards the education where boys get a little bit more room to daydream. Interesting. We want to be a pro athlete or you know, I I I think we just we're just all over the place. And girls seem to be more focused, and that that focus goes from girls to women.

SPEAKER_02

Right. So, yeah, I'm I'm thinking something similar to what what you were thinking, but but more more along the lines of like when I think of why women are getting degrees at a higher rate and stuff like that, I feel like they're aware, right, um, of the disparities in the opportunities that they would have after they after they finish school, right? Like so we talked a little bit about the disparity in the amount of um executive roles or or C-suite roles that women tend to occupy as opposed to men. And I feel like, you know, corporate environments and work environments in general are a little more kind of friendly, so to speak, or or inviting um to men as well. Like the like you said, like the same, it's kind of parallel to what you're saying, right? Because there's a whole lot more opportunities in sports for men than there are for women, right? So that's opening up a lot, like you said. There's more leagues opening up for women um than there were in the past. And so there's obviously more opportunities for the for them to become professional athletes at this point. But even but even as we say that, they're still facing the same challenges in the work environment, um, especially in corporate environments where it's highly competitive and men still dominate, right? Yes. So education, um, for any for any so so-called like kind of um protected status group or out group, you know, education is kind of the great equalizer to a certain extent, right? So I think you learn early that the only way to kind of give yourself the edge is to make sure you have that degree. You can't afford to leave it to chance or to leave it up to a favor or some some networking opportunity. You have to have the credentials as well as all the other goods. We have to have the the network as well as the education, as well as the credential, as well as the degree and the certificate and so on and so on and so on, right? So I feel women have learned that um they need these things in order to give them the edge because there's such a disparity in their opportunities when it comes to the workplace, right? So that that's that's kind of something where they've learned to kind of outwork and outcompete their male counterparts, at least in that way. So so so as to make sure that they don't leave anything to chance when it comes to like competing in in the in the in the workforce, right? Yeah. Um so it's just something uh to Yeah, to give themselves a chance.

SPEAKER_00

It's almost like their A has to be better than our D type of thing or our C.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. So a certain extent, yes. Like they have to be, they have to be, you know, leaving nothing to chance, right? Like they have to have all the boxes checked. Whereas, like we said, like a man may get some leeway, right? Like the same as like you said, like a man may get a chance to daydream when it comes to like, you know, opportunities in in sports, like they get a little more time to dream. Um, I think in the same way, men are getting a little more leeway when it comes to um to the workforce, right? Because we're because oftentimes like there's a lot of m male-dominated fields when it comes to even um, especially I should say, um, you know, kind of the higher paying jobs for male-dominated fields where men are gonna kind of give each other the edge, um, regardless of education levels, regardless, regardless of experience levels when it comes to their their um their kind of parts who are who might who may be women, right?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. And since most men are dominating, especially in the CEOs and the Fortune 500s, that leaves the door wide open to cronyism and nepotism.

SPEAKER_01

Right, exactly.

SPEAKER_00

You you know what I mean? So um also if you're I would assume if you're a woman who's a CEO of one of these Fortune 500 companies, it's a very small margin. You can't afford to make a mistake on a hire if you hire another woman. You know, a man, you can make a mistake and then it's just on to I'll just hire my next my buddy or this guy or that guy, whatever. You know, he was doing this and then he came back, he decided he was, so I'll give him a job, I'll give him a chance. Um as a woman, if you're in these high-ranking positions, you can't afford any leeway of making a mistake on a hire because you know if you do, you hire somebody who may not be as qualified or doesn't do a good job, you know that may be the last opportunity that you are allowed, so to speak, to hire another woman in that position. So they have to constantly be on point.

SPEAKER_02

Right. Yeah, right. And and I I feel like I feel like again, like that's that's probably the case for anybody in kind of a a protected status group, right? Like anybody who's considered like a quote unquote minority in an environment like that, um, then they're gonna feel like they don't have a lot of leeway. Um, they don't have a lot of people giving them the benefit of the doubt. So a mistake is glaring when it when it happens. But yeah, I I agree, man. I I I think I think like you said, like like when when they have a missed step, it's gonna get amplified and probably attributed to to their to their their status as opposed to attributed to like you know just uh just growing. Like, you know, people everybody's gonna make mistakes in in these environments, right? It's part of learning and it's part of your growth process, right? But I feel like those mistakes get amplified as opposed to their, you know, the the the good qualities or the wins sometimes.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. And as fathers of daughters, it's very important for us to do our part in nurturing them to know that they are strong, they are smart, they are beautiful, giving them every opportunity to succeed, whether it be exposing them to every kind of sport that they can expose to, and then taking them to the library, making sure that they get their schoolwork done, they have a focus. It's important. It's important as a man to do your part and to help your daughters out because we're the ones, we're the example that they're looking for. And you have to give them this confidence to go out into the world and and fight for what they want. Women are the most intelligent people on this planet, they far exceed us in terms of intelligence. You under you understand what I'm saying? But they don't all they don't always get the opportunity because it's a male-dominated feel, it's a male-dominated world, so to speak. Even though overall we are in the minority.

SPEAKER_02

And well, that's the the irony of this. But like you said, like even, you know, when I think about my my own daughter, right, I'm not only supportive of her in that way that you described, right? Like where I'm I'm trying to bolster her confidence and make sure that she understands that she can do whatever she puts her mind to and if she puts in the work and and all that. But I'm also realistic with her in terms of letting her know that excellence is not an option. Like you really have to do your best and put your best foot forward and try, you know, try everything you can to be successful because of the fact that like like we were saying before, um, you're not gonna have the edge, right? So you have to give yourself an an edge by being excellent, right? Like you can't leave anything a chance. I stress that with her too, that that um not maybe not in those words, like in it, because I I try to make sure that when I'm my message to her is age appropriate and and you know that she can consume it and and and stay in a positive kind of light. But um I do make sure that I'm kind of stressing to her that that your academics are extremely important, you know.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Sometimes it's just like, hey, trust me on this. Like I don't go into into like a lot of detail, like I said, because maybe it's not it's not all age appropriate and maybe it's it would take her a while to to kind of digest some some of what uh my thoughts on this, but some of it has to be like, hey, trust me, like education is is extremely important. Um because I know for a fact that that's gonna be one of the things that does give her any type of edge if she's gonna have one. But yeah, I definitely agree with you. Like it's important for us to to kind of build their confidence and make sure that they understand that they're supported in every way, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, show them every path there is, lay it all out there. So the exposure, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

The exposure that you mentioned is important too, like exposing them to different different pathways, exposing them to different experiences. Um that's that's also gonna be I think that's another way to to provide an edge as well. If you have a well-rounded experience, um it it's only gonna grow you as a as a person. It's gonna make you a better person, more experiences, um, more knowledge, um and more kind of common ground too, with with people that you might meet out there in the field.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, because I I owe one thing with my mother, like I'm gonna I'm gonna give her uh props. Now I I I um a lot of the things that I were I was exposed to was because of my mother. You know, like if there was a museum or something, or she would take me to um the aquariums, or she would take you know what I mean? She was taking she was the one taking me out on long trips and I was and seeing around the city and taking me to other boroughs and exposing me to all type of um all type of experiences that that forged me kind of as a man.

SPEAKER_02

You just did she take you to Brooklyn?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, she took me all the way out to Brooklyn in the 80s, and in the 80s, bro. She took me out to Brooklyn, I believe she took me out to the aquarium out in Brooklyn in the 80s, son, by herself, dolo with just me, you know. Um and there was never anything that it was never anything that she told me that I couldn't do. My father's always been there. Um we're both blessed. We always talk about our fathers, you know what I'm saying? But my mother was always there, like pushing me and reinforcing and telling me that there's nothing that I couldn't do. And she was making sure that I got to see everything that everybody else got to see.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

You know? And that's a big thing.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, and and and I can say the same for my mother, man. Like, like most of the things that that I was exposed to that that were kind of off the beaten path, so to speak. Um because my my mother would find that that type of experience and and and kind of um try to make sure that that I at least got to try it, even if I didn't like it, type of thing.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Um and the other thing I would say about my mother is that she was always my my biggest fan. Was always like super impressed. Yeah. And and and and sometimes that's that I I I could see how that could be a a bad thing sometimes, where like you're impressed with even the things that your kid is supposed to do, so they get this idea that everything should be celebrated. But but in my case, it it made me the type of person that that wanted to keep making her proud, right? Like I wanted to keep making, you know, impressing her. You know what I mean? Like, so even if it was things that I was really supposed to be doing, like getting good grades in school and stuff like that, or you know, even when I when I got my first job, she was always like super proud, like like beaming at the things that sometimes I felt like, oh, this is just what I was supposed to do. But at the same time, I had it gave me a good feeling, so I would just keep kind of keep doing what I was supposed to do, I guess, right? Um yeah, it it I think I think that was one of the things that kept me um kind of on a straight and narrow path, so to speak. You know, there's temptations out there, you know, like growing up where we grew up. There's a lot of you know detours that you could take. But I have talked about this before, was wanted to make my parents proud, man. Especially my mother, she was really impressed with me, you know. Yeah, um, so I wanted to keep that that same good feeling going for as long as I could. So I felt like that was one of the things that kept me kept me going on a on a on a on a good path. Right.

SPEAKER_00

That's my boy, that's my boy.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, she was always real, real, really impressed. Even if it was just something I I felt like, even if it was something that I know for a fact that it's just something I'm supposed to do. Yeah, you know, she was really encouraging in that way, right? And if I if I would stray from that though, she would let me know, okay, this is not this ain't this is not what I expect, you know, like like what happened, what happened here? If that if my grades would dip a little bit, she's like, hey, what happened here? You know, she would really be distraught. Like if everything was was was kind of off of that. So so yeah, that that was one of the things that kept me like kind of on the straighten out. I didn't I didn't want to disappoint her.

SPEAKER_00

Um There's nothing more disappointed than having your mother like have give you that look that you did something that's just like I'm so disappointed in you.

SPEAKER_01

You almost rather she be mad or or yeah, I'd rather you just just get the belt be.

SPEAKER_00

You know what I'm saying? You know what I mean? Even as a grown man in the 50, like I I don't want my mother to look at me like I'm just you just uh I'm just so like yo, just go get the belt, baby. I'd rather I'd rather get the belly.

SPEAKER_02

You'd rather get a whipping.

SPEAKER_00

I'd rather get a whipping. You know what I'm saying? And it's like they they don't say words, but they're saying everything. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? I remember when I was younger and I was playing in this basketball tournament, and my mother was I just heard somebody screaming on the sidelines, and it was my mother, right? I can hear her every time, like, that's my boy. She done knocked the poor man out of his seat. You know, she done jumped up, waved her hand, knocked the man out of his seat. So, as like as fathers, we need to be that for our daughters. And not only our daughters, our wives, right, um, our sisters, uh, you know, our cousins and female friends. We need to be more supportive because like we need you all around.

SPEAKER_02

For our sake. Yeah, that's a fact. Apparently, they're saving our lives, so we need them around.

SPEAKER_00

Saving our lives. Yeah, like I said, about 70% of my clients that are men. They don't I don't get hired by men often. I get hired by their wives, their significant others, and they kind of like bully them into it. You know, I've I've had opportunities, I've had times where I've come to the house and the dude just didn't want me there. You know what I'm saying? And he's and his wife is like sitting there watching him, you know what I mean? Like, like, yo, you gonna do this, you know. Tell him, tell him what happened. We went to the doctor's office and I got died, I got my A1C is up and my cholesterol is up, and he said I need to exercise. And tell him what else. This is a true story. Tell him what else, tell him what else. Um, I'm um I'm not gonna do it on my own. So she I'm not gonna get healthy on my own. So my wife said, I need some intervention, you know. So, you know, we need you. They take care of us. Good woman takes care of you, man. You live longer. Yeah, you know, and I and a man's lifespan ain't but a minute anyway. So we need every second that we we can get. And we still leave before they do all that time taking care of us, and we still kick it earlier than them.

SPEAKER_02

Check out, yeah, we still check out before them.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Yeah. It's a whole nother show. Yeah, it's a whole nother, a whole nother show. There's an interesting other fact that I saw, and I saw 70% of women now over the age 40 report no interest in dating and prefer to be single.

SPEAKER_02

It's funny, man. Like I had this conversation. So so quick story. This on Friday, I went to the Truist Championship, and it's a golf tournament, you know, a big golf tournament sponsored by Truist Band, right? Um, so it's the you know, the biggest golfers in the world, right? But the point is. That you know, a vendor that my company works with invited me to go to this thing. I had never I never been on a golf tournament, I never watched golf before, really, ever. Right. But the point is that part of this experience is just kind of like the people you meet. You go there, meet a bunch of people, um, there's there's drinks, there's food, whatever. Like you it felt like we watched golf for like a quarter of the time, but most of the time you you spend kind of like it's almost a networking opportunity, right? So I I just happened to strike up a conversation with someone there, like a woman that was telling me how hard it is in the dating scene right now. And she said the same, she said something similar to what you just said, right? And I found it shocking because you know, I haven't I haven't been on the dating scene in a long time. I'm like, the way she was talking made me just really glad that I'm married and I don't have to worry about this anymore because she says something similar to what you to the stat that you just read is that she's not interested in dating anymore. She just she'll just remain single unless some some some miracle happens or she just happens to meet somebody, but she's not really interested in like actively seeking a partner anymore because of the fact that she's had such bad experiences with the dating scene, right? And she was 40. Um, and I thought that was interesting. But it just you just reminded me of that because that was just on Friday um that I had this conversation with somebody, and and she said this, she said something similar, and I was just like, What? Like that doesn't make any sense. Like you're gonna go from now until you know, so when? So you're elderly, like you're just never gonna date anybody. So I I thought that was a little bit interesting. Um, but what why do you think that is though? Like what it, you know. She claimed that it's because men are not ready to commit, even at ages like you know, in their 40s and 50s, even yeah, it feels like men are not ready to commit, that you just still want to play the field, right? And I found that yeah, I'm like I I found it hard to believe. I I listened, and I'm not saying that she's not right in her experience, maybe that's been her experience, but I found that a little bit kind of surprising to be honest with you, right? Like that at that at that stage that men are not willing to commit or they they still want to play the field even in their 40s or 50s with the clock kind of kind of ticking. Because you know what I talked about that before, that you're in like your two-thirds life. You're not that's not that's not midlife. You're you're hitting the two-thirds mark, and you would think that men would be more kind of um serious about and and and intentional about about about their word. About about you know, about dating and about finding like a partner, especially if they're you know if they're single to begin with, you would think they'd be intentional about finding someone to settle in with.

SPEAKER_00

So that would be that'll those are millennials, right? She's a m yes, that's millennials.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, like yeah, yeah. Yeah, the yeah, it's right behind us. So yeah, millennials.

SPEAKER_00

It's right behind us, that's millennials. So um I was I was talking about this and I I read something about it. So I'm gonna I'm gonna paraphrase what I read, but I can't remember I can't remember the article uh specifically. But just in general, we talked early about uh men's relationships and men not having relationships and with the dawn of the AOL chat and the internet age, millennial men in general have come up in the Tinder age. Yeah, yeah so to speak. Right.

SPEAKER_02

And and I can see I think you say that just so the audience understands what was going on. Oh, the cyber dating. The cyber dating. Right, we're saying like the online dating that's gonna be a good idea. Yeah, that's bigger than that.

SPEAKER_00

Well, the chat rooms were bigger with us because we were at like the beginning, like we were big and the chat rooms was were big with us. Um, but we would like we would go from the chat room and we would actually like really meet and and still go out and still go to clubs and still go to lounges and still go and meet people in the frozen food section of the supermarket. You know what I mean? Like we supplemented our dating life with the chat with the chat room, the chat rooms life, so to speak. Um, but everything has become so computer-based and online-based that I can see and also what I was reading in this particular article, which I'm paraphrasing because I cannot remember for the life of me exactly where I saw it. But they were talking about how these online dating, the Tenders, um, the the plenty of fit, whatever the other ones are, the Bumble, which I met my wife on Bumble, actually. Um they they kind of cater to men to put them in a perpetual I have a shot. You get a swipe and it hits those endorphines. It and you get a swipe and you just want another swipe and another swipe. And it's just it's just made so that a man you feel so wanted that you feel like so wanted by all these women that you feel like you always gonna have a shot at plenty of women and you don't have to even leave. Because men, we're lazy. That is interesting. We're lazy by choice.

SPEAKER_02

You know, I didn't I didn't think of it that way, but I understand what you mean. Like it it's almost like you have this infinite kind of pool.

SPEAKER_01

Yes.

SPEAKER_02

And and obviously you can't date all of them, but but it like opens up the field more so that in a in a way, even though you're not talking to them personally directly, it does make it gives you almost an illusion that there's this this large, large pool to pick from. Right. Yeah. Whereas before this, before the internet, you kind of you had to go out, you know, find a woman, or maybe you you met a woman through a friend, or you met through some event or some common interest. But meeting in person and having to do the work of at least going out and and trying to find them or or or them finding you somewhere, you had to be out and about and you and it was kind of a little more work involved. You could you couldn't you couldn't possibly meet a thousand women, right? But if you if you have an app, you could keep swiping. You could keep swiping and potentially, you know, there's a thousand to choose from after a while. If you keep swiping enough and you keep just staying on that app enough, now your your potential is rising exponentially, right? So I didn't I never thought of it like that. And that's an interesting thing, because I I guess that would lead a man to to being motivated to kind of stay single.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

If he thinks that all his options are so open because this app is showing him potentially thousands of women from everywhere that he could possibly go out with, right?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

If he's willing to, right?

SPEAKER_00

And you're like striking out nine out of ten swipes. You know what I'm saying? But that tenth swipe. That tenth swipe keeps you coming back for more. It's a dopamine hit, yeah. It's a dopamine hit crazies. And and now you're out there and you're present. You may be in person on a date with somebody, but you're not present. You know what I mean? Like you're there, but you're not really there. You're thinking about I wonder that this person, am I when I come and I open up after this, is this person? Um, I'm gonna have a shot. Because that you you know, it's so it was so hard. That's it.

SPEAKER_02

That sounds super addictive too. I didn't I never thought of it that way, but that sounds really addictive, like the swiping and and just being able to open that app and and check to see if somebody's interested in you.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Um, that's that is actually an aspect of it that I never thought of. And maybe, like you said, like generationally, the people that are growing up with or like coming up in an age where that's so common that their bra they their whole brain is changed around around the dating scene, right? Yeah. The way their brain works is is completely different than than it was when we were younger, right? When you didn't have that opportunity.

SPEAKER_00

Um, yeah, that's and you don't even have to talk on the phone. Like all it is is like text, text, text, text, text, text, text. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Right. It's the least possible effort with the with the greatest possible gain. You're getting that that possibility in your mind without the rejection, because you're behind the screen, and and even if you get rejected, it's not it's not even as impactful because it's not like you're getting rejected in person or anything like that. It's just a yeah, it's just another face on a screen, right?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and you never quite realize how to like interview, so to speak. Because a date is an interview. If you think about it, a date is an interview. So you you have that person who's sitting up in an interview that's very awkward and very, you know, confused about what they should say or what they want to say because they don't have much social physical interaction. You know, and and and couple that with the fact that they're always more mature than us. So they're always a couple years ahead of us. Even you know, even we could never you could never get in a club where you have 15, 16, 17-year-old girls go to clubs earlier, um just doing everything before us. You know, being being grown before us, so to speak. So sometimes when you get to that age, especially as a uh a millennial, because you're right kind of on that cusp on the but depending on your age range, you're close to the Gen X or you're closer to the what's the the generation after the millennium? The Gen Z. And and you're kind of you're kind of in this like limbo type of thing where the guys are like, wait a minute. So I can just just do nothing here and I don't have to put in the work, but like they want to be engaged, they want to meet somebody to talk to, and then you get this guy that walks up to you that doesn't know he's totally different than the text messaging that you've been um relay relaying. He's probably by now they probably use a chat GPT to have their chat GPT and they're probably conversations, and I think that has a a lot to do with it. I think there's a socially a social awkwardness that goes into dating now that like older women are just getting fed up with it. And it's like, you know what, forget it. I'd just rather I'd just rather be on my own. If I haven't caught anybody yet.

SPEAKER_02

Well, I hope it's not all the women, because if if that's the case, then you know the human race is uh Yo son in trouble. We headed for extinction. Yeah, if that's the case. 71% over 40, that's yeah, if if if I hope it doesn't get that's a large number, man. Because you start to hear stats, similar stats you start to hear about like the younger generations too, like where they're not as interested in going out anymore because of social media and because of computer games and they don't go to bars as much.

SPEAKER_00

The the the the liquor industry is is down because they don't go out to bars.

SPEAKER_02

You know what I heard about the bar thing though? They said that the younger generation, um, not only are they like less likely to be in clubs, but they tend to be more health conscious, to be honest. If you believe believe it or not, like they they're more concerned with with eating healthy and and working out and keeping their body, you know, fit. So drinking is just not a thing that they feel is is is fitting into their lifestyle right now, right? Like so it's not just a matter of like their social behaviors, but it's also a matter of their behaviors in terms of like keeping up their health, which is a good thing.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

But it but I guess it hurts in terms of like their their socialization because not them not going to clubs or going out to bars and stuff like that as much is probably gonna lower their percentage chances of of meeting somebody in that in that way, right? Yeah. So they're gonna have to meet in like again in ways that foster like you know, common interests. They're gonna have to meet, you know, in the gym. You know, they're gonna have to meet at CrossFit and whatever whatever else they they're gonna be doing. Yeah, whatever they do, whatever cooking class, the vegetable cooking class.

SPEAKER_00

I don't know what do they call them? The cy they this is it the cyber libraries or the cyber uh where they everybody goes, sit down. They don't talk to each other, they just all the cyber cafes. Everybody goes and they just all sit together at this cafe and they have drinks, but they all just open their laptops and don't talk to anybody sitting next to them or in front of them. Like it's weird times, bro.

SPEAKER_02

I didn't know that was a thing.

SPEAKER_00

The cyber cafe?

SPEAKER_02

I didn't I knew there was cyber cafes, but but the way you're describing it, I didn't picture it. I didn't I never pictured it at all. So I the way you're you the way you're picturing it, or you're you're describing it to me rather, is um um you know surprising.

SPEAKER_00

You can go to you can go to a c you can go to a club and what do they call them? They call them like silent clubs where you just you're wearing headphones in the club.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, where you're wearing headphones with the music. That's crazy, son. I've done that actually, like I've done that with my wife though. Like we've done that, I think we did it on a cruise.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

We went to one of those one of those, like a silent party, and you know, you just do you have the music in your headphones. You actually have a choice of music you could listen to. Um you can change it on the fly, like you could change a few different choices, but you're listening to this music. But if you take those headphones off, it's silent completely quiet and everybody's kind of like just dancing around with the headphones on. Um it's interesting. It's a little strange at first, but but it's it's um you kind of get you get it after a while. I don't I don't know, I can't explain it, but uh you get it after a while.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, when you're older and you're like, wait, I can control my own volume instead of standing in front of this. Yeah, maybe that's it too.

SPEAKER_02

Like, you can control the volume. Uh you can control to a certain extent the music that's being played in your in your headphones. So, yeah, the ability to control the volume and the type of music is a benefit for sure. And me at the time that I did this, I was I was already married, so I guess you know that was a benefit to like wasn't dating or trying to find a partner in in that atmosphere because I can't even imagine what that would be like. But um, but yeah.

SPEAKER_00

We came up in a time where everyone was always outside in the parks as well. You know, so we always had some type of interactions with with uh uh the girls when we were younger and the women would you know, so we were always in the park when we were playgrounds and we would go out in the summer and we'd be outside and and everyone would be congregating, and it's not the same as anymore. So I can see how as you get older you don't have those years of um of of failure.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, yeah. Because as as you described this, I'm like, wow, that was failing at the emotion.

SPEAKER_00

Like I was Yes, there's a lot of crashing and burning.

SPEAKER_02

So you know what I mean? I'm like, you know, it's outside, but uh, you know, that doesn't mean there's a lot of crashing and burning.

SPEAKER_00

I took a lot of L's out here in these playgrounds when I was younger. You you take a lot of L's growing up back in the day when you just lick your wounds and you just keep going. But imagine if you don't have to like have that rejection.

SPEAKER_02

Like after a while, you have a tough, a tough skin.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. Yeah, so after a while, it's just like, no? All right, then, you know.

SPEAKER_01

Another no.

SPEAKER_00

Another no. Then you start playing the percentages, like, all I need is one yes. That's it. I'm just going for one. Just give me one, you know. But imagine you turn on your mini supercomputer and you you have a uh uh 10 swiped yeses, and you only have a you only have really a chance with maybe one if you're lucky. But it's like, hi, I don't have anybody in my physical presence telling me get out of here, scram, or looking up and down. You can put whatever dicks you like.

SPEAKER_02

It definitely changes the game. Like I didn't think of it like quite like that when you you know what you described about the sweat thing and and the number of of of women that that a man might think he has a chance with, right? Like so it makes him less likely, maybe less likely to commit, right? Like I didn't even I didn't even think about that. If you have all those choices in your phone that that are making you believe that that you have a chance, then maybe you are gonna be less likely to to kind of settle settle in with one person if there's if there might be more waiting for you on your app, you know? Yeah. That is an interesting but kind of a little bit scary thought, you know?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think that contributes to that 71%. And also, like to be fair, to be fair, we are men. So it to be fair, like there are also women that are very awkward as well. For men, it's hard to get a swipe. But for women, like all you do, you open up and you probably swipe 10 times, you get 10 matches.

SPEAKER_02

Um that too, that's a really good point. Like, because at the same time, like you're saying, like men might have their percentage of choice might raise quite a bit online, right? A woman's choice might that has to be like ridiculously crazy numbers.

SPEAKER_00

Oh my goodness, yes.

SPEAKER_02

Where they probably have a choice of a thousand men every every time they open up that app, there's a thousand swipes.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, son. Yeah, it's like a thousand it's like a billionaire's uh million compared to a poor person's five dollar bill. You know what I'm saying? Which means more. Right to a person with nothing, you get five dollars, it's the world. Five dollars to a billionaire is nothing. You know what I mean? So women, right?

SPEAKER_02

You get 10 swipes, 10 swipes, and then you maybe yeah, I didn't I didn't think about it that way either. Like, so that's interesting. That's it just makes so much sense. So simple that that is that it's um and I'm missing I'm missing the point on that, right? Like, because what but when you think about the way you're saying it, it it's it's it's even more scary because when you think about that, women that are that may be using these apps to meet people, they have so many choices, man. Like how can they even how can they choose one person? Yes. Right. So men have no chance of being chosen in that scenario, right? Because they're always gonna be looking for, you know, maybe a somebody different, somebody that matches better, a better, you know, some better fit in in whatever way, you know, whatever way it might be, but they might be looking for a better fit all the time because they have so many choices.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Wow, man, these apps are really young. Technology is I don't even think about all the ways that technology is kind of um it's it it it serves us, but then it serves us too well, you know, like it's it serves us so well that it's negatively impacting us.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Because we don't have to we don't really have to hunt, so to speak, right? Like you don't have to do anything, you don't have to put effort into anything more. Yeah, because the the technology is serving you everything in a number that you could not have imagined or you could not get on your own, right? Everything is being served to you so easily, um, including dating. Which is which is yeah, it's that's scary. And it's and and as a result, it's actually hurting you more than you would think it would help.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

So like break the ice and it would help people that have like, you know, suffer from any type of social anxiety. Like in a way, I'm sure it does.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

But it feels like it's too much of a there's such a thing as too much of a good thing.

SPEAKER_03

Yes.

SPEAKER_02

And the way you're describing it is like, wow, this might be too much of a too much of a good thing, right? Yeah, yeah, man.

SPEAKER_00

It's too many, it's too many choices on one side, and it's not enough choices on the other side. And if you think about it, it's the perfect the perfect storm for these these dating apps to make money.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. You ever you ever heard of um forgot his his last his first name, but um Scott, and actually Scott Galloway. Have you ever have you ever heard of Scott Galloway?

SPEAKER_00

No, I'm not familiar with him.

SPEAKER_02

So so Scott Galloway is a is an economist and he's an entrepreneur. Um he he has his own podcast and he talks a lot on other podcasts, but but he tends to talk a lot about kind of the uh the this this as a crisis, like the dating issue, um, and the fact that young people aren't dating enough. Um they're not they're not actually social enough in order for the population to to maintain itself. Like we need young people to go out there and and be dating a lot more and be settling down and having families and so on and so on and so on, right? Right. But he talks a lot about the fact that men don't have practice in getting rejected, um that they need to develop a a tough skin. And he talks a lot about this, this, um, this issue with with the technology and and the the the swiping makes it so you don't have you don't have to you don't have to have skin in the game. Yeah. Um and you don't have to make the effort to and learn how to how to talk and learn how to hunt, learn how to sell yourself. And he's saying that it actually leads to um a different another problem, like I guess uh uh you know, I shouldn't say different, but like just a a separate problem where he thinks that it's leading to young men not doing enough to work on themselves. They're not motivated to to to kind of make themselves into a man that is kind of worthy of the woman, right? Um and it means that they're not they're not willing to kind of like whatever it is, like get fit or whatever, whatever the case may be, or they're not willing to to do the work to to get a great career anymore because it's not really necessary in order to attract a woman. Because a lot of the things that men do, um, you know, and and I might be overgeneralizing here too, but a lot of things that men do is is is kind of to attract the mate, you know, like too. It's our plumage.

SPEAKER_01

It's all plumage. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, like like yeah. We're like that bower bird that that makes the um the really fancy structure. Like they do the dance, they make the structure, and then the woman comes, the the f the female bird comes and looks at the structure. If they make a good enough structure or do enough enough dance or whatever it is, they'll pick that bird as the mate. But for humans, we have like similar ritual where for us, a lot of times it's men are about dressing nice and looking good and smelling good and making a lot of money or having a nice car, having like the trappings of wealth, or seeming to have the trappings of wealth to attract the mate, right? And he's saying that because of these apps, because of the way technology is and cut, and because of kind of like the the kind of lack of socialization that this is causing, that that men are not doing enough to become that that strong mate, you know, that a woman would would naturally be attracted to, right? And then one of the other problems too is that like you said on the woman's side, they have so many choices that they're not they they want every man to be like the six-foot, you know, six-figure, um, you know, yeah. The, you know, this this superman.

SPEAKER_00

There's a checklist sometimes.

SPEAKER_02

Right. There's a checklist a lot of times, right? And because that app makes you put in your data, right, you they can right away just rule out a whole group of men that maybe if they met them in person, they would give them a chance, right? Um so it it kind of limits the pool for guys that are not like six foot making six figures um with a six-pack. Whereas if they met him at a bar, at a club, or or as some some place of common interest, like at like what they call third spaces, they may have given them a chance just because the guy is clever or he's you know, whatever. They think he's funny. Um they they strike, you know, they just have a great conversation or whatever the case may be, or they or they're attracted to him for some other reason, right? He's saying that a lot of that stuff gets kind of automatically um ruled out because the app is forcing you to kind of take your best picture and then check off all these boxes of your interests and and who you are, and you're getting swiped on um based on a bunch of stats rather than the actual person that you that you show up as, you know. Yeah. So that's you know, I find that to just be another interesting aspect of this, right? Like um, how the technology, like I said, it might be too much of a good thing, but then in some ways, it's it it's taken the a lot of the intangible factors out of it, right? Yeah, um, some of the things that you know there's been because there's been women, I'm sure there's been women in your life, and and I I know like they you might have you might not have been their type on paper, right? Like you know, like I heard that before, and the same vice versa. Like you might have been you might have dated a woman in your life, like where on paper, if you just looked at her stats on a sheet or on some computer, you'd be like, nah, this is not my in this is not my type, right? But when you met in person, something in in you like something clicked, right? And something about her, like, you know, you you hit it off, right? Um, but you like I said, you rule that out if you're really relying on a on a on an app to give you all the information you need and a person taking the best picture that they possibly can. Um so so yeah, you you just reminded me of that. Like, because I I've I I sometimes follow Scott Galloway on on and and listen to some of the things he says. And that was one of them the interesting things, his take on like kind of young people and their and the dating behaviors.

SPEAKER_00

So it's it's weird. We're in strange times, man. We're in strange times. So key, women, take care of yourself, get healthy, go to the gym.

SPEAKER_02

Yo, funny so so I got a crazy fact, right? Like, and you might know this already, right? Like, and I'm sure that a lot of people know this already, but when you talk about women's health, like this stands out to me every time, right? And and I don't mean this to say that that this is women's purpose or or this is their like kind of imperative or whatever the case may be. It's just it's just kind of a fact that kind of pokes out at me when we talk about health, right? Did you know that that women are born with all the eggs they're ever gonna have?

SPEAKER_00

Yes, they have a finite, not not finite. Is finite the word that I'm gonna do? Finite is the right, it's it's the right word. They have a finite amount of eggs.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, like they're not gonna be able to.

SPEAKER_00

That's what menopause is. Basically, menopause is where they're out of eggs, like that's a rap.

SPEAKER_02

Well, yeah, I mean, they stop obviously, they stop like pushing those eggs out. Like then, I don't know if they're out of it. I don't know about that detail, but but I know that that they're born with all the eggs they're ever gonna have. So it's it's interesting because it it kind of like puts some urgency on the need to for them to stay healthy and to keep them protected. Like, I don't know, it just puts me in a different mindset about like the the reverence or something, you know, like or the sacred nature of of the woman because and like I said, like I don't mean to say that that's their purpose is to like carry eggs or like to have children or anything like that, or but I do feel like sometimes that gives me like this this sense of like wow, you you know, this woman should be protected and and and and women are are sacred, right? Like they're they're holding that life, you know, in a like you said, in a finite number from the time that they're born, right? And it's just just an interesting thing to me. Like well, men is different, like you know, we're producing sperm all the time.

SPEAKER_00

And yeah, we got we got 8-year-old celebrities having babies. Yeah, you have like you have like Alpacino athletics, you know having babies at 87, Tony Randall was having babies at 79.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, so it's like yeah, it's not as it's not as scarce, right? Like, but it feels like you know, something to be protected. Because like when we talk about women's health, I think about that fact that they're carrying all the eggs that they'll ever have from the time that they're born is um just just like mind-blowing, you know. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. There's your fun fact if you didn't know.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, there's always gonna be some fun facts anyway.

SPEAKER_00

Some fun fact for I'm sure that's just a fun fact for whatever. And so we got listed out there.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, somebody fact check us on that Jodice song too. Is Cry for You really about a dad being left home with the kids?

SPEAKER_00

I feel it's about my life, son.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, somebody, somebody fact check us.

SPEAKER_00

I feel like it's about my life right now, son. There's no scarier thing to rant on this world than being left alone with being told, like giving a heads up about it. Like if you just spring it on me, then I just have to deal with it. But if I have to like anticipate it, oh my goodness, son.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

Jordan Peel meme, yo, the sweaty meme, the sweaty meme. I'm like, oh my gosh. What do you what do you what do you what do you what do you what do you mean, just me?

SPEAKER_02

What do you mean you'll be gone for an hour?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, man. That's too long. Come back home, please. Please, I can't live without you.

SPEAKER_02

Shout out to Joe. It makes sense.

SPEAKER_01

So you got anything else to add, brother? No, man. I'm I'm I'm I'm all right. I'm all fun fact out.

SPEAKER_00

No fun fact out. So this concludes our latest episode of the Jet Expertise Podcast. Shout out to our now, day 39s, our day ones, and everyone in between. And as usual, and as always, shout out to our day one, day one. In this case, our wives. Our wives and our mothers. Well, our day one, day one, day one is our mothers. And then our day ones are wives. So happy Mother's Day to everyone out there, especially ours. Um, we love you dearly. They did not put us up to this episode at all. No. But man, you know what, right? Because we are prolific. That is correct. We are prolific, my brother. We will be back same gen next time, same gener next place. We'll see you next week. But until then, happy Mother's Day. We love y'all, and power to the podcast.

SPEAKER_02

Power to the podcast.

SPEAKER_00

Peace.