The Reason (Ecclesiastes 3, Hebrews 6, Matthew 11) with Christina

Christina is back. Pastor Dee and Bernie want to express our love and support for her during a season that would weaken most. Yet through deep faith and dependence on Jesus, Christina has emerged from the storm as an even stronger witness of God’s goodness.

In The Reason, Christina shares the difficult journey of losing her father to pulmonary fibrosis and the powerful ways God sustained her through grief, fear, and uncertainty. From the long hours in the hospital to the quiet moments of surrender, she tells how Scripture anchored her soul and how God surrounded her family with comfort, provision, and hope.

Through Ecclesiastes 3, Hebrews 6, Matthew 11, and other passages, Christina reminds listeners that God is near to the brokenhearted, faithful in every season, and the steady rock beneath our feet.

If you are walking through loss or searching for hope, this testimony will point you toward the One who is our anchor, our comfort, and our reason for hope.

Hope at the Cross Facebook page. Please like and follow! https://www.facebook.com/people/Hope-at-the-Cross-Podcast/61578096604028/

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hello everyone, it's been a while. It's me, Christina. There have been a few things going on that I hadn't been able to record. Um, life can be that way sometimes, you know. We had discussed seasons before, and for those who don't remember, let's go to Ecclesiastes 3, 1 through 8, and then I'm also going to be reading verses 11 through 14. I like to read from the amplified version. Y'all are welcome to read whichever version you have. There is a season, a time appointed for everything, and a time for every delight and event or purpose under heaven. A time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted, a time to kill and a time to heal. A time to tear down and a time to build up. A time to weep and a time to laugh. A time to mourn and a time to dance. A time to throw away stones and a time to gather stones. A time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing. A time to search and a time to give up as lost. A time to keep and a time to throw away. A time to tear apart and a time to sew together. A time to keep silent and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace. He has made everything beautiful and appropriate in its time. He has also planted eternity, sense of divine purpose in the human heart, a mysterious longing which nothing under the sun can satisfy except for God. Yet man cannot find out, comprehend, grasp. What God has done, his overall plan from the beginning to the end. I know that there is nothing better for them to rejoice than to rejoice and to do good as long as they live, and also that every man should eat and drink and see and enjoy the good of all his labor. It is a gift from God. I know that whatever God does, it endures forever. Nothing can be added to it, nor anything can be taken from it. For God does it so that men will fear and worship him with all filled reverence, knowing that he is God. So I just wanted to reiterate that there is a season for everything. But God also places eternity in our hearts. While we are alive, we should also eat and drink and see and enjoy the good, for that is a gift from God. First Thessalonians chapter 5, verses 16 to 18 reads, Rejoice always and delight in your faith, be unceasing and persistent in prayer in every situation, no matter the circumstance. Be thankful and continually give thanks to God, for this is the will of God for you in Christ. So we know one of the gifts of God is for us to enjoy life and the fruits of our labor. And the will of God is for us to always be thankful, to always delight in our faith and always rejoice. In January, I lost my dad to pulmonary fibrosis. I debated whether to bring this up or to talk about it. But two things. One, I felt like you should know why I have been absent and it's been so long since I recorded. And two, Revelation 12, 11 reminds us that it is by the word of our testimony and the blood of the Lamb that the accuser is defeated. Psalm 66, 16 reads, Come hear me, all who fear God, and worship him with all-inspired reverence and obedience. And I will tell what he has done for me. It is important because the same trials that I go through, so do everyone else. And it is important to know that during these trials, you remain encouraged. How can you know that God can do it for you if I don't tell you how he has done it for me? So with that, 1 Peter 3.15 reads, But in your heart set Christ apart as holy, acknowledging him, giving him first place in your lives as Lord. Always be ready to give a logical defense to anyone who asks you to account for the hope and confidence, assurance elicited by faith that is within you, yet do it with gentleness and respect. This story, this testimony is my account for you to be able to have hope and know that there is hope in our Lord. So with that, my dad was diagnosed with pulmonary fibrosis about five to six years ago. God saved me from myself, and so my dad did get to see me recover, be born again, and be sober. Thanks be to God. The disease slowly took my dad. It took him in ways that I mourned him as he lived. When the day finally came, it was a day that I had feared for my whole entire life. That day started with a phone call from my mother. She called, distressed, screaming and crying, that my dad was gone, that he had that his heart had stopped. She explained that she had woken up to him breathing funny and his oxygen had fallen out of his um fallen off during his sleep. And she called the ambulance and the ambulance came and while they were there he had fatlined and they were doing CPR. I rushed to my parents' home. The door to their room was closed. My mom was in the living room crying with my nephew. The door slight slightly opened and I could see my father's feet going up and down as they as they worked um as they administered CPR. I felt at that moment that he was gone, and I I didn't I didn't think he would be able to come back from that. As they escorted my father out of the home, my mother's sisters begged the first responders to not give up. To please save him, as they were still working on him, as they escorted him out. On the way, driving my mom to the hospital, I reached out to my church family, to Pastor D, to everyone I could. I begged for their prayers. I went to the hospital and uh my family, we all gathered there, waiting, waiting for a word. A word I had already feared that they were just gonna come and say that there was nothing they could do. As we waited for word, Pastor D, God bless her, came and she prayed for with me, with my members of my family. She reminded me about how all we need is stayed as well as mustard seed. When we finally got word, we were amazed to find out that they were able to bring him back. They did warn us, however, that they did not think he would live, they did not see a good outcome. We not told. Because how could we not? At some point, it was revealed to us that they had worked on my dad for 48 minutes. 48 minutes. It's a very long time. In fact, I believe most doctors or nurses would have not like. I don't I don't ever hear of them ever working on someone that long. But all I can think is the cries of my mother and my sister begging the first responders. So I feel like they they relayed that to them and and on our on their wishes, on their pleas. They did what they asked, but they brought him back. Of course, the first 24 hours are the most crucial to see what's going on, what's gonna happen. And the doctors never brought any good news. They never brought a a hopeful report, but we didn't we didn't we didn't listen, you know? Um as far as we were concerned, we weren't gonna give up on him. We didn't think he'd give up on us, so we weren't going to give up on him. And we looked for every sign of of good outcome. You know, there's there's there's things that they go and they tell you, okay, we're looking at these numbers, we're looking at this, we're looking at this, and whenever something, you know, some numbers would look bad, we'd start praying that those numbers would look good, and then they would, and then there was something else that they'd come and say, okay, these numbers don't look good. It was such a roller coaster. It was such a that was the most difficult time of all. Living on a constant limbo, if you will, and that time during that time, I uh all I could think about and all I kept saying in my head over and over and it was I was reminded of was you know Hebrews 6, 18 through 19, so that by two unchangeable things, his promise and his oath, in which it is impossible for God to lie, we have let him for refuge, would have strong encouragement and indwelling strength to hold tightly to the hope set before us. This hope, this confident assurance, we have as an anchor of a soul. It cannot slip, and it cannot break down under whatever pressure bears upon it, a safe and steadfast hope that enters within the veil of the holy temple, that most holy place in which the very place of God dwells. I stood in the hallways of the hospital, reminding myself, reminding myself that I was anchored, that God was my anchor in this storm. So it's like a hurricane, but I knew that I would not, that my God would not fail me, and I could make it through, and that we would. When it was finally time for my dad to go, I remember my sister said, Oh my god, it's it's happening at the machine, you know, flatlined. And I got so scared, and I said, Dad, Daddy and it's crazy because I said that and his heart started to beat again. And then I felt so bad because I knew my dad was tired. I knew I knew that he was just gonna go to just go home. He always would remind me whenever I was younger that we were just passing through. So the next time it happened, I remained silent. And he went so peacefully. I'm so grateful for even though those last 29 hours were the most difficult hours. We had the opportunity to say goodbye. Our family got an opportunity to see him one last time, even though he wasn't really there. After his death, I questioned my grieving process. I isolated myself as much as I could. This sounds strange, probably, if my family were to hear this because I was with them all the time, but because when I wasn't, I just I just wanted to be away from it all. I did my best to not think about it. You know, my family would talk about him and I'd join in the conversation, but I did not want to. I felt like I didn't want to because I just didn't I didn't want to. It was very hard for me. I didn't think about it, I didn't ponder it while I was by myself. I compartment compartmentalized his death for a little bit, and I said to myself, I'll open it, I'll open that box when I'm I'm ready. And I just didn't feel ready. I didn't feel ready because I was afraid. I was in fear that I might fall so deep into depression, I would not make it out. I was even afraid that what if I relapsed? I didn't I didn't have the urge, but I was afraid of what if I got the urge because I would be in so much pain. I went to church, I raised my hands in worship, in obedience, not because I felt like it, but because I knew that my situation did not change who God is. He is still the maker and creator of heavens and the earth, he is still our savior, he is still our provider or counselor of the perfect Lamb of God. So I grounded myself in that, knowing that I was holding on to fear that does not belong to me. It does not belong there because he did not give us a spirit of fear but one of faith, power, and sound mind. It wasn't until I surrendered my grief. Sounds strange, right? To surrender it, just to give it to him, but I realized that's what I had to do. I knew it's what he wanted me to do. Matthew 11, 28 through 30 reads, Come to me, all who are weary and heavily burdened, and I will give you rest, refreshing your souls with salvation. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest, renewal, blessed quiet for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and my burden is light. And I released it. The pain, the tears, the confusion, all of it. I allowed him to finally take it. My dad, who I miss so much, he would not have wanted me to be without staying connected to our Father in heaven. And I know also he would not have wanted us sad. It's been a difficult season, but in this season, God has carried me. He has sent people to pray, he has sent people to feed us, he sent people to be with us to support us. The love of God surrounded us, me and my family in ways that there's no way to deny who he is, or that his love and comfort helped us through it. And now, two months later, I sit here, sure, knowing that God wants you to know who he is. Psalms 34.18 reads that the Lord is near to the heartbroken, and he saves those who are crushed in spirit. Matthew 5.4 reads, Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted. Psalms 147.3 reads, He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds, healing their pain and comforting their sorrow. He is a good God, even in the season of mourning. I hope that you know you are not alone. Stay planted firmly on his word and remember Matthew 7, 24 through 27. So everyone who hears these words of mine and acts on them will be like a wise man, a far-sighted, practical, and sensible man who built his house on the rock. And the rain fell, and the floods and torrents came, and the winds blew and slammed against the house, and it did not fall, because it had been founded on the rock. And everyone who hears these words of mine and does not do them will be like a foolish, stupid man who built his house on sand, and the rain fell, and the floods and torrents came, and the winds blew, and slammed against the house, and it fell, and great and complete was its fault. I can testify to you today that his word is true. Before I close, if there is anyone out there who has not yet accepted Jesus into their heart, but has made the decision to want to know him and to accept him. I invite you to close your eyes and pray, Lord, I know you love me. I know you sent Jesus to die for my sins and for my salvation. I open up my heart to you and accept Jesus as my Lord and personal Savior. Thank you for loving me in Jesus' name. Amen. To all of you who prayed that with me today, welcome to the family. I encourage you to get grounded in the church. I encourage you to seek like-minded people if you have any questions. There are ways that you can reach out to us on this podcast. This is a house of prayer. We will pray with you and will point you in the right direction. Just reach out to us or reach out to someone. Um a church that is based on his word. I'm going to close with the scripture that I read at my dad's funeral. And I want to thank you all for listening, for being out there, and I hope and I pray that that Holy Spirit spoke to you and that in this podcast his will was done. Lamentations three twenty through twenty six reads My soul continually remembers them and is bowed down within me. But this I call to mind. Therefore I have hope. It is because of the Lord's loving kindness that we are not consumed. Because his to because his tender compassions never fail. They are new every morning. Great and beyond measure is your faithfulness. The Lord is my portion and my inheritance, says my soul. Therefore I have hope in him and wait expectantly for him. The Lord is good to those who confidently wait for him, to those who seek him on the authority of God's word. It is good that one waits quietly for the salvation of the Lord. Thank you, all of you. God bless.

SPEAKER_00 18:26

He carries me home, frees me from my birthday. I am not fearing, no doubt, it's my sight. And where are we strong enough for me? Leave me home. Leave me home to the field. I take the friend He takes me death. Open your eyes. Open your eyes. Come to the park, it takes me there home to the house.