Our Solo Travel Experiences

Solo Travel Stories: Thailand During COVID vs. Portugal for Self-Discovery | We Should Move Here Travels

Brittany and Josh share their solo travel adventures at very different points in life, comparing Josh’s loosely planned trip to Bangkok, Thailand in early March 2020 with a chaotic COVID-era return flight, and Brittany’s recent solo trip to Aveiro, Portugal focused on rediscovering independence and confidence. Josh describes arriving at midnight without phone service or a plan, navigating safety concerns, exploring temples and markets, and how the experience sparked his love of travel and food tours while highlighting the need for more awareness and planning. Brittany recounts initial fear and decision paralysis giving way to comfort, self-reliance, and practical safety habits like delaying location-based social posts and preparing a “white lie” if asked about being alone. They discuss being alone vs. lonely, the value of independence within relationships, and recommend being safe, doing research, and booking a food tour early.

00:00 Solo Travel Intro

00:59 Pandemic Return Chaos

05:13 Thailand Trip Setup

07:16 Midnight Arrival Shock

08:54 Bangkok Streets Survival

11:14 Exploring Food And Temples

13:08 Lessons And Safety Tips

19:29 Brittany Solo Trip Begins

21:34 Fear And Finding Confidence

24:46 Turning Point Question

24:59 Arrival Nerves

25:54 Finding Confidence

28:01 Alone Not Lonely

29:02 Solo Safety Tips

30:54 Meeting People Abroad

32:50 Eating Solo

36:02 US vs Abroad Safety

39:14 Future Solo Travel Plans

42:45 Independence In Relationships

45:45 Final Advice And Wrap

@WSMHtravels

Transcript

brit 0:11

Hello, and welcome to the We Should Move Here Travels podcast. My name is Brittany.

josh 0:16

I'm Josh.

brit 0:17

And we are your hosts. Today, we are gonna be talking about our solo travel adventures. So we have now both done a little solo traveling, and we're just gonna talk about it today.

josh 0:34

Yeah. Both of us at, uh, very different times in our lives. Yours very recent, mine quite a long time ago now, or at least in our lives a long time ago now.

brit 0:48

Yeah. When was yours?

josh 0:50

2020.

brit 0:51

2020. Oof.

josh 0:54

Oof.

brit 0:54

Oof. What a year to solo travel.

josh 0:59

I know. What a week to solo travel, early March 2020.

brit 1:03

Yeah.

josh 1:04

Yeah. It, was a nightmare. Talk about giving me a crash course in being able to navigate, uh, airports when stuff is going wrong because when I was coming back from my trip, everyone was well aware that the airports were gonna be shutting down within the next 72 hours about. and planes were canceling or transferring to weird places like mine did, and then just having to find a way back.

brit 1:33

so when did you come home?

josh 1:34

I believe I came back March 12th of 2020.

brit 1:39

That's crazy.

josh 1:41

Mm-hmm.

brit 1:41

No, that's insane. I would have so much anxiety at that point. I did have so much anxiety at that point, and to be in an airport coming home from Thailand-

josh 1:49

Mm-hmm

brit 1:50

that must have been so crazy. Did, were you anxious or, like, how did it, how did it feel?

josh 1:56

So I was supposed to go from this flight from Thailand to Japan and then Japan to Chicago, and that was my end destination. I was gonna be picked up in Chicago. I wasn't coming all the way back to Appleton, if I remember correctly. But when I got to Japan They put me on a flight to Colorado, and then I was supposed to go Colorado to like another airport, like Minneapolis, and then Minneapolis to Chicago. Okay. Like this weird bunch of transfers. And like I was saying, everyone was well aware that airports were gonna be closing down- Yeah very soon, and I didn't wanna be in a completely different state and that airport or that state decide like, "No, we're cutting it down before everyone else."

brit 2:45

What would you have done if that did end up happening? What would you have done?

josh 2:49

I... Well, I would've... Well, no, I was gonna say bus, but buses probably would've been the first things to close ahead of airplanes.

brit 2:57

Yeah.

josh 2:57

Oh, boy. I guess- You

brit 2:59

would have to call your parents

josh 3:01

call my parents, or rent a car. I guess I could have rented a car-

brit 3:05

Oh, yeah

josh 3:06

and then driven it across the country, and then maybe, just returned it at the local rental, like Hertz or something. Who knows? But yeah, I wasn't really nervous while I was in the Japan airport 'cause for, the 24 hours prior to actually getting to Thailand's airport, I was like, "Okay-" we're just gonna go and see what happens. And then when I got to Japan and they let me know, I was like, "Well, I prefer to stay on this flight." And they're like, "Oh, why?" I'm like, Mm, airports are shutting down. This is right next to my home." And they're like, "Oh, okay. Well, if you're okay with sitting in the middle of the middle row surrounded by four other people." I'm like, "That's fine. I just wanna go to my airport." So...

brit 3:51

Oh my gosh. Were you nervous about COVID? Like catching COVID? Did you have a mask?

josh 3:56

No. But it was weird because in Thailand they were well aware of it. They had installed like free mask boxes at all of their like train stops and-

brit 4:07

Oh

josh 4:07

had, um, hand sanitizer pumps, so everyone getting on and off trains was like hand sanitizing. And they had like security watching them.

brit 4:16

Yeah.

josh 4:17

So when I... And that was right away when I got there, and the United States was still kind of like, "Uh, like we might close, we might not close," but Thailand was just already like, "Something's going on."

brit 4:29

Wow. I didn't catch the travel bug until after COVID. Mm-hmm. And I can't imagine being in another country while COVID is exploding all over the world, that must have been such a terrifying time for you. So many thoughts going through your mind, but also like you made it home. You didn't get COVID, at that point.

josh 4:53

A- and as far as I know, yeah.

brit 4:55

Yeah. wow, what a time.

josh 4:57

Mm-hmm. The, the COVID aspect happened I think might have kinda jolted me a little bit. Like, okay, you gotta figure your shit out.

brit 5:05

Oh. How do you mean? What do you think that did for you? Like, what shit did you figure out after that?

josh 5:13

Well, I guess I should just kind of explain my trip as a whole. Yeah. And then, go into that more. So my trip was to Thailand. Originally I was looking into doing a solo trip because one of my friend's parents at the time said, "You just need to go on a trip by yourself and like figure yourself out." They told me that in like mid-November, and I was like, "All right, cool." And I just was like, "Oh, Singapore, that seems like a cool place." Looked up, saw ticket prices, but on Google Maps you can see ticket prices to other countries. Saw Thailand right next to it, about half the price. I was like, "Cool, we're going to Thailand." And I saved planning I think anything for Thailand up until like the two weeks before maybe.

brit 6:01

Like, you bought the flights-

josh 6:03

And then just let it sit there. I didn't do anything

brit 6:05

else. Like no hotels, no nothing? Oh my God.

josh 6:07

No nothing. No. I told my, my parents, and my dad's like, "Oh, I have, a friend who's gone to Thailand before. Like, he can probably give you a few tips." I was like, "Cool." Didn't even text him until like the two weeks before, and he gave me like recommendation for areas and hotels, stuff like that, the two weeks before, which is the only time I planned anything. So I booked the hotel then, and I think I also like Googled what to do, and someone like on Reddit I think said, "Well, you need to book a food tour because- Thai food is a crazy experience, and having a guide to kinda give you a full experience is something that you should do. So I had booked that, and that was, I think, pretty much the only things I had done. I didn't do any research on any other restaurants, what to do, where to go, nothing. The only thing I vaguely remember doing was downloading Google Translate. I was like, "I don't know how to speak Thai-

brit 7:07

Mm-hmm

josh 7:08

or any, like, Asian language I might run into. I'm gonna need Google Translate." So I downloaded that. and Google Maps, I think I downloaded a map. So then I went to Thailand, and I had a great experience. Also scary. I arrived at midnight, couldn't check until, into my hotel at 3:00 PM. I thought Uber was available there. It wasn't, so I had to talk to someone else into- figuring out how to, uh, get a taxi because also my phone didn't work, so I had to purchase a local chip.

brit 7:42

Oh my God.

josh 7:44

Right, right then at the airport at midnight. So I had all these crazy things. Got to my hotel, wouldn't let me check in until 3:00. I didn't even think about going to another hotel, renting a room. I was like, "I'll just hang out in the streets of Bangkok, Thailand."

brit 7:56

For 13 hours- For

josh 7:57

13

brit 7:59

hours

josh 7:59

after a long-ass flight. After a long flight. Did

brit 7:59

you sleep on the

josh 8:00

flight? Oh, for sure. Yeah, I was out.

brit 8:02

Okay.

josh 8:02

Yeah.

brit 8:03

So you did get some sleep.

josh 8:04

Mm-hmm.

brit 8:04

Good. But you sat on the streets of Thailand for 13 hours. First of all, the whole chip thing in your phone, you just handed your phone over to a stranger in another country, your first time in another country alone. Mm-hmm. Just handing your phone over.

josh 8:21

Yeah.

brit 8:21

And then they give you a chip. I... Oh my gosh, this sounds like a recipe for disaster. I'm so glad nothing happened- to you because what?

josh 8:31

Yeah. Uh, thank goodness, there are a lot of people who travel who are a lot smarter than me and, and do it when they're not in self-destructive moods. You know, I assume that maybe some people who do this realize early on that it's not a good idea, and they do a lot more planning than I did. but yeah, I mean, it was, it was fine. In Bangkok, Thailand, where I was staying was a very heavy area for sex tourism, I guess. And so when I was walking the streets, there were a lot of sex workers out on the streets, and they were aggressive because I was a white male all by myself, and it just scared me. And so what I did was I went to 7-Eleven, and I just got some like snacks and some drinks and just sat out on like the stoop of this 7-Eleven.

brit 9:26

For 13 hours?

josh 9:27

For a good amount of time. I mean, I start out and I get... Uh, I guess I did do some research because I knew a Cheese Toasty was something really popular from 7-Eleven. So- So

brit 9:38

you did that research, but you-

josh 9:39

So, yeah

brit 9:40

but not to make sure that your phone would work.

josh 9:43

You know.

brit 9:45

Yeah. I love you so much, but oh my God.

josh 9:51

This was... I think I was 24 at the time, so this was 24-year-old Josh or 25-year-old Josh. But, uh-

brit 9:57

Aw.

josh 9:58

Yeah. But yeah, so I just wanted a Cheese Toasty. Um, I think I might've got a soda, some sort of local soda. I know I got Cremos, which are just Oreos, but they call them Cremos. Oh. Or at least that's what package says, yeah. So I got Oreos, and I just sat on the stoop, watched like the garbage truck come pick up garbage. I remember the smell was horrible. because it was so hot and humid, even at night, like it must have been in the 80s and extremely humid, so the smell of all the garbage just hung in the air. And I was like, "Oh, this is so gross."

brit 10:33

What did you expect to happen? Like, when you, when you landed, what did you expect to see and feel and like what did you expect?

josh 10:41

I had no idea. I was in such a state where I was doing so much crazy shit for the f- year prior because my long-term relationship had ended. And like I said, I was in a self-destructive mood. You know, probably drinking too much, um, being around people that probably weren't the best influences. So I was like, There... Nothing worse can happen to me. Like, I'll just go there, and I'll just drink for a week and, like, meet people." Hmm. And I mean, that's kind of what I did, and also did a bunch of exploring, just walking around, going into temples. You know, I met a guy who's like, "Oh, just talk to a taxi. Have him take you around on his little," I think it's tuk-tuk or something. They're little motorized- Oh scooters pulling, like, a small cart, and-

brit 11:33

Yeah, we saw them in Portugal as well.

josh 11:35

Yeah, very, very similar. but we ha- paid the guy to do that for an entire day. Mm. He took me to a cool restaurant. went to a floating market, you know, where you get on one of the boats, and then there are a bunch of boats, like, tied together, and people are selling fresh fruit and vegetables and stuff like that. And- Oh

brit 11:53

my God, that's like a dream. I would love to do that.

josh 11:56

Yeah. Yeah, it was, it was very cool. and then I did do... The one mistake I did was I did a food tour, but I did it at the end.

brit 12:03

Mm.

josh 12:04

And it... But it was such an amazing experience, and I'm pretty sure it was my first ever food tour ever traveling.

brit 12:10

Yeah.

josh 12:10

And it was so amazing. They g- different fruits, different, like, local, sweet dishes, um, different, meats that they cook differently. A whole bunch of stuff, and it opened my eyes, and it was just crazy, but I loved it. And of course, I did a lot of just what I wanted, which was my hotel had a rooftop pool with drinks, so I would just sit by the pool and go in the pool and have drinks. And there was a bar that was open pretty much all the time just around the corner from the hotel. And beers were, like, a quarter in US money. baht is crazy cheap for the US dollar, so I would, drink beers at a quarter. And there was a nice little- Like, outdoor patio eatery right across from hotel too that I ate from there a bunch, and a bunch of food carts always around 'cause it was a big tourism area.

brit 13:04

Mm.

josh 13:05

So I just, I did whatever I wanted. It was a crazy experience. Then had the flight home from Thailand during COVID, that craziness, and I think the whole experience m- was like, I should be a little more conscious of what I'm doing with my life. Mm.

brit 13:24

So it made you, like, recognize that you need to reflect on your decisions-

josh 13:31

Mm-hmm

brit 13:31

is what I'm hearing.

josh 13:33

So many things happened. If, if I keep talking about it, more things will come up that I remember that were just crazy. I remember the day before I left, it was in the middle of winter, the garage door fell off the garage. Oh

brit 13:44

my God.

josh 13:44

And we couldn't fix it before I left, so we took a big tarp and just stapled it.

brit 13:49

Oh my God.

josh 13:50

Me and my dad did. I was like, "It'll be okay." If someone wants to steal something, they can. It's okay.

brit 13:55

Oh my gosh.

josh 13:57

Yeah.

brit 13:58

There were... It seems like there were a lot of things that, were maybe signs from the universe at that time for you.

josh 14:05

It definitely. It's, it's interesting though. I f- I feel like the universe puts you in a stream or a river-

brit 14:15

Mm

josh 14:15

and you can either swim with it, paddle with it, whatever metaphor you wanna use, or you can fight it or try to get off the stream, create your own stream. And I was definitely fighting it. I was trying to get off, create my own stream. I'm like, "I'm gonna do my own thing." Universe was trying to push me to safety. I was like, "Nah, I'm going over here."

brit 14:38

No way.

josh 14:39

Mm-hmm.

brit 14:40

Not doing that.

josh 14:42

Yeah.

brit 14:43

but it also sounds like this trip helped you get back onto the stream where the universe wanted you to be.

josh 14:52

Correct. Yeah. I'm trying to think of good metaphors, but I can't at the moment. No, that's okay. But it definitely did. It, at the end, especially with the COVID bit, I was like, "Oh, man. I should have been much more aware of my surroundings when booking the trip." Mm. I should have been much more aware of where I was going. I should have planned more, because there were definitely times where I felt unsafe.

brit 15:14

Like when?

josh 15:15

Well, when I first got there at midnight and had to spend probably, I don't know, six hours until the sun came up, basically.

brit 15:23

Mm.

josh 15:24

not a lot happens that's good, I would assume, in most places past midnight. Mm. And especially in a place you don't know. drinking a lot in another country alone, like accepting drinks from other people. It's, I, and I was very determined to see a lot of Bangkok, and I did, and I went to some really cool markets-

brit 15:47

Hmm

josh 15:47

that also had some sketchy areas that I was just like, "Oh, what's over here?" And I walked through those and didn't even care. Yeah, I... Just a lack of research and self-awareness. Being aware of what's around me is- what happened basically that I did wrong. Yeah.

brit 16:09

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, to be fair though, you were also, what? 24, 25.

josh 16:14

Mm-hmm.

brit 16:15

So I feel like that's normal for that age group. Now that you're, you know, eight years older-

josh 16:22

Mm

brit 16:23

which is a huge shift in development- Oh, for sure because your frontal lobe is now developed.

josh 16:28

Yeah. So- No thanks to the alcohol, but yeah.

brit 16:31

Well, I mean, back then it, it would've been very difficult for you to think through all of your decisions, whereas now it's easier for you to do that.

josh 16:40

Right. Yeah.

brit 16:42

So, like, developmentally it makes sense. It sounds like the trip was really good for you at the time in your life.

josh 16:49

It was. I would not change my experience at all. I mean, as an adult looking on a younger person who just did that, I'm like, "Why would you do that?" And I definitely would, if a younger person was saying they would do that, give them plenty of advice and tips like, "Don't do this."

brit 17:07

Yeah.

josh 17:07

You wanna have a great first experience, here are some tips on what not to do."

brit 17:12

Yeah.

josh 17:13

But I wouldn't change it for me. Because even though as scary as it was, it got me addicted to traveling. It got me addicted to food tours and food in other countries and cultures of other countries. I was always interested in, like, different religions or, Like a spiritualness. Mm-hmm. So going and walking through temples being around Buddhists and that sort of thing was just so cool to me, and it was as cool, even more cool than I expected.

brit 17:47

Yeah. I was gonna ask if you went through any temples.

josh 17:51

Oh, loads. You did,

brit 17:52

yeah.

josh 17:52

Tons, 'cause in, in Bangkok there's so many. yeah, and, and s- lots of them just there for tourism.

brit 17:59

Mm-hmm.

josh 18:00

I'm sure there's plenty of people who, you know, say, "You gotta go to Phuket, you gotta go outside of Bangkok," and of course, yeah. If I went back I would travel lots outside of Bangkok, which I didn't basically at all.

brit 18:14

Yeah.

josh 18:14

Um-

brit 18:14

But we will.

josh 18:16

Yeah.

brit 18:16

We will get there- When, when- 'cause that it is on my list

josh 18:19

when we go to Thailand, for sure. Yeah. Spend a day or two in Bangkok and then go around, 'cause there's a lot of cool places in Thailand, for sure.

brit 18:27

Yeah. I mean, I think based on your story, and also being a woman, I don't know that I would feel fully comfortable solo traveling there.

josh 18:37

Mm.

brit 18:37

So that will be a couple trip, for sure.

josh 18:40

Mm-hmm.

brit 18:41

I'm sure it would be fine, and like we're adults now who can make good decisions and think through things, but, even with like your stories, I'm just like, "Nope, no solo travel over there for me. I'm good." I'll go with you and that'll be that.

josh 19:00

I have looked at, there are plenty of people, men and women, who do solo travel.

brit 19:06

Tons,

josh 19:07

yeah. And they're just fine. But it's a, it's also like what is your risk tolerance?

brit 19:14

Yeah, for sure.

josh 19:15

Your anxiety level.

brit 19:16

And you just gotta be smart about it. Mm-hmm. I'm sure I would be fine. Yeah. But you just gotta be smart about things and- Right really think things through, plan things, like everything you didn't.

josh 19:29

Well, I mean, that's a fantastic transition though into you with your trip.

brit 19:35

Yeah.

josh 19:35

So I think we should just talk about how your trip went and everything you went through.

brit 19:40

Yeah. Well, I, um, if you didn't listen to the Aveiro episode, go and listen to that, because I kinda talked through everything that I did and went day by day. but in general, I will say that I learned so much about myself. for a long time I felt like I had lost myself- Mm in m- my schooling, my education, my career. And those things were so important to me that I had lost who I actually am. I feel like solo traveling helped me learn about who I am again.

josh 20:23

Like what you liked, like your personality, or?

brit 20:26

Well, yeah, that and also, what I enjoy, what I don't enjoy, because there's so many times that even just you and I together, that I have decision paralysis. Mm. And I am like, "I can't make a decision." And I think that boils down to me wanting everyone to be happy around me, right? This is quickly turning into a therapy podcast- and I'm not meaning it to. But this is, these are things that I learned on the solo travel. And, I think being there by myself, I couldn't have decision paralysis, because it was just me, and the only person I had to make happy was me. So it was much easier to do that. And then I think about, like, well, I can't control other people's emotions, right? So- there's a lot of work still, I think, there. But, I think solo travel- Mm pointed those things out to me. And I may have knew them or felt them before, but they were very highlighted when I was alone. and I used to really be afraid of being alone, and I was for I think the first 24 hours. I was scared.

josh 21:43

Was that, like, on the plane traveling there, or once you got to Aveiro? Or both? Were you, like, those travel and once you got to Aveiro you were really scared? Or nervous?

brit 21:53

You know, it's interesting because I can really shut off my brain when I'm in a busy situation. So getting on the plane, traveling through the airport, that was not a big deal for me. Yeah. I was able to do that no problem.

josh 22:06

Mm.

brit 22:06

But it was the last flight from Newark to Lisbon where there was a, I think, like, a two-hour delay.

josh 22:16

Mm-hmm.

brit 22:17

And I was like, "Okay, I'm just gonna go sit somewhere. I already ate something, already got a drink." I just sat at one of the, like, waiting areas and I remember sitting there being like, "Whoo, it is scary." It is really starting to hit me and then I think from that point on, until I got to Aveiro and then maybe like 12 hours after, 'cause I slept and everything, um, I was pretty terrified. I was really scared to be alone and I didn't know what was gonna happen. I didn't know if I was gonna feel safe. I didn't know if I was gonna figure everything out. really didn't have a whole lot planned. Like, I had researched Aveiro a little bit-

josh 23:03

Mm-hmm

brit 23:03

but it wasn't in, to the extent that I usually do. Right. So that was making me a little nervous. Um, but then again, like I knew that Portugal is very, very safe and so I kept reminding m- myself of that.

josh 23:19

Yeah, I think when you and me had talked about you doing a solo trip, I definitely was thinking of myself going to Thailand and be like, "We're not gonna do a lot of these things." So I made sure it was a safe place.

brit 23:31

Mm-hmm.

josh 23:32

You knew where you were going. Y- you knew what was available to you.

brit 23:36

Yeah. Not that Thailand is not safe because-

josh 23:39

Right

brit 23:39

it definitely is. Mm-hmm. There are places that are safe and unsafe in every single country-

josh 23:44

Right

brit 23:45

all over the world. I think you having some of that prior knowledge did help me a little bit. but overall, like once I got there I was like I am alone. Mm-hmm. I really can't do anything. And I had made myself a promise that I wasn't going to, use my phone as a crutch.

josh 24:04

Mm-hmm.

brit 24:05

I don't think I did all the time. I think there were points where I definitely did. and I'll own up to that, you know, like, there were points where I was feeling, like, scared, so I reached out to you.

josh 24:17

Mm-hmm.

brit 24:17

Or, like, I called you or I went back to the place that I was staying and I was like, I need to talk to you." but overall, I think once I got comfortable, I was like, "Oh, yeah," like, "I can do this. this is fun." and I went shopping one day and, not that I got much, but shopping is fun for me and I loved it. And, like, there were different stores, stores I'm not used to, and I was like, ooh, what is this? You know.

josh 24:46

What was the biggest turning point? 'Cause all of a sudden you were scared and then you were like, "And then I was out doing stuff." What... Was it that shift, like, I'm not gonna use it as a crutch, or did something just happen, like you just started walking? What was it?

brit 24:59

so the first day I got there, I landed, I think, at around, like, 9:00 A.M. Portugal time.

josh 25:06

Mm-hmm.

brit 25:06

checked into the place at maybe around 3:00 after getting the train and- Mm-hmm figuring everything out. So checked in as soon as I got to Aveiro But walking from the train to the place that I was staying was scary, I will say. I was like, "I don't know where I'm going. this is a bigger city than I thought. This is a longer walk than I thought. It's hot outside. I don't know where my deodorant is. I probably smell right now."

josh 25:41

Worst nightmare.

brit 25:43

Yeah. Literally.

josh 25:44

But- Being scared and smelly.

brit 25:45

Yeah. That is my worst nightmare. Um, but then I got into my Airbnb. I fell asleep. The next day, I woke up terrified, and I started making a social media post, and I made it very intentional that I was gonna be talking about my solo travel adventures. And so I had some fun with it that first day. And then I was like, "Well, for social media, I gotta go out for a walk and I gotta get out of this- Mm this place I just started walking, walked around, found myself down by the water, down by the old fish market area. I just started to recognize that it's a beautiful town, a beautiful place. It's Portugal, so it's very safe, and people are not rude. People are very kind here. Like, nothing bad is gonna happen to me here. And once I had that realization, I was like, "Okay. I'm fine. I'm gonna go explore." And then the more I explored, the more I felt confident in, I don't know, just being alone.

josh 26:59

Mm-hmm.

brit 27:00

Which I guess sounds really weird, but I think for me, it took me a long time to even want to do the solo travel-

josh 27:10

Mm-hmm

brit 27:10

because I hated the idea of being alone. So for me, this was huge. It was a huge step. And now, after the solo travel, it was only five days, right? It was not that long, but it was life-changing for me. Because after the solo travel, I have now been going on walks alone. I feel like telling you when I don't get enough me time, right? And, like, I notice that I do need me time, and I never really noticed those things before. So I do think that this short solo travel adventure for me was life-changing.

josh 27:52

Yeah.

brit 27:53

Yeah.

josh 27:54

I think it is for most people, but for sure us. We both had life-altering experiences.

brit 28:00

Yeah.

josh 28:01

And one thing that both of us kind of mentioned, and you for sure just did, is being alone versus, like, being lonely.

brit 28:08

Mm.

josh 28:09

Y- you know, I think I went to Thailand, and I was lonely. Again, I'd gotten out of a long-term relationship and kinda had spent a year doing whatever, and I went to this place and then was alone. I wasn't lonely. I was alone with myself, and I had to deal with myself, and then got that confidence to do things, to go out and do things, try new things through the experience.

brit 28:36

Yeah. No, that's really interesting I guess I always thought that they were one and the same, being alone and being lonely, but they're not.

josh 28:45

Mm-hmm.

brit 28:45

And I did learn that in Portugal because I was not lonely. I knew I could always call you. I knew I could always talk to you. I was just there alone.

josh 28:58

Mm-hmm.

brit 28:58

And, like, there were tons of people around that I was, like, getting to know and I also think an important thing to mention is safety. Mm. So I feel like I have learned a couple of safety tips, from posting on social media. I recognized I am not going to post when we're in the city because I don't want people to actually know where I am, just in case there's any weirdos out there, you know? Mm-hmm. So that's a safety tip that I would recommend for anybody posting their stuff on social media. Mm-hmm. Just wait until you're in the next city or wait until you're home, whatever you gotta do.

josh 29:40

Did you do any of the, like, a strategic white lie for anything? We had talked about it a little bit. Like, if someone asks, like, "Oh, are you here by yourself?" And then were you like, "Well, yeah, my fiance is here with me. He's meeting me for dinner," or something like that?

brit 29:55

Yeah. You know, I, I did have something in mind, and if somebody did ask me, I was gonna be like, Yeah, we're just doing some different things today." Mm-hmm. Um, "But my fiance is back at the Airbnb."

josh 30:08

Mm-hmm.

brit 30:09

So I would've just said that. However, nobody asked me.

josh 30:14

Mm-hmm.

brit 30:15

Not one person asked me, and I was like, Okay."

josh 30:18

Didn't need to worry about that at all.

brit 30:21

I feel like because it was Portugal, nobody's gonna ask creepy questions like that, like, it felt much safer.

josh 30:32

Yeah.

brit 30:33

However, if we were in the US and I was doing some solo travel, I for sure know that some creepy old man is gonna ask me that, okay? And I'm gonna have to lie.

josh 30:45

Yeah.

brit 30:45

Always lie.

josh 30:48

But you were prepared.

brit 30:50

I was prepared, yes.

josh 30:51

Mm-hmm.

brit 30:51

Yes. that is a good safety tip, though.

josh 30:54

So like talking with locals and other travelers, did you find it really easy when you went on your tour to talk with others or when you were walking alone? Anything like when you ran into someone, did you find it really easy to break the ice and talk to someone or were, were you having a hard time?

brit 31:11

No, I did have a hard time.

josh 31:13

Yeah.

brit 31:14

I think that once it became time for me to do the tour, I did one tour. So the tour was a boat ride, a walk through the city and like a cultural exploration through the city, and then a wine tour all together in one ticket price. So there was another couple with me on all three, but the first part, the boat part, was a whole group of people that didn't come to the rest of the tour, and that whole group of people I don't think, uh, spoke English. So the tour guide was speaking both English and Portuguese, I believe. and mostly Portuguese because I was the only person not speaking Portuguese. but so I found it really hard at times with the language barrier. I think after the boat tour and the rest of the tour, I talked with the couple a little bit and that was nice. But I really didn't talk to a whole lot of people.

josh 32:20

So, so do you think this solo trip kinda proved that you're a bit of an introvert? Or was it just being your first experience? 'Cause do you think this told you, like, "Oh, next time I do it I'm definitely gonna try to be more outgoing"?

brit 32:31

I am. I'm gonna try to be more outgoing next time. I don't know if it fully means I'm, I'm an introvert. I do think I am, but- Mm-hmm I, I just find it hard to talk to strangers.

josh 32:45

Yeah.

brit 32:46

so the people that I talked to were, like, servers yeah.

josh 32:50

How was that? Because that's such a unique and personal and one of our favorite experiences is going to restaurants and, like- Mm. splitting food, trying new food, stuff like that. So how was that for basically six days, not having someone to get another entree and split with?

brit 33:09

Well, that part sucked- because I love trying new food, and, like, we get to try so much extra food because we split everything.

josh 33:17

Mm-hmm.

brit 33:17

there were times where I got something that maybe I didn't like the most, and I was like, "Ugh, if Boo was here, he would eat this." Um. Well-

josh 33:30

I could pawn this off on him and-

brit 33:32

Well, you like things, a l- a lot of things. You're not that picky.

josh 33:36

Mm-hmm.

brit 33:36

Um.

josh 33:38

That's so funny. Did, did that make you more so ask, like, the waiters or the staff, like, a recommendation, or were you just, "No, I'm gonna order-" I did. You

brit 33:51

did? I did ask recommendations a lot. I also got a lot of things that I was craving.

josh 33:58

Okay.

brit 33:58

I think that f- first day I got a Buddha bowl- which was absolutely delicious. I got chocolate-covered strawberries.

josh 34:06

Fantastic.

brit 34:07

Oh, I got risotto And it was so salty and delicious. It was exactly what I wanted. I got, the fancy meal, the francesinha. I... There's a lot of things that I was like, "Yes, I am trying that," and a part of me really loved when I loved the meal and I didn't have to share it. But then a part of me was like, "Oh, Boo would really like this too."

josh 34:36

I don't get to try it, or I don't get to share this cool experience or this good food with... You know.

brit 34:41

Yeah.

josh 34:42

Mm-hmm.

brit 34:43

So that was kind of a bummer about it, but I did appreciate a lot of the food in Aveiro.

josh 34:49

Mm-hmm.

brit 34:49

I liked eating it by myself too.

josh 34:52

Yeah.

brit 34:53

Didn't have to share.

josh 34:54

I think that's something looking back on my trip that I recognize happened because I did travel once out of the United States with my ex before.

brit 35:05

Mm-hmm.

josh 35:05

And so got to share some experiences like that, and then when I went to Thailand by myself and like on the food tour tried some really good food-

brit 35:14

Yeah

josh 35:15

I was like, "Man, who do I share this with? Like, who do I tell?" And I, I posted like on social media and texted people, called people, and that kind of sat- satisfied that craving of needing to share it with someone.

brit 35:30

Yeah.

josh 35:31

But now, like traveling with you, I don't, I don't have that lonely feeling anymore because I know we're going halfsies on everything. And so if I love something, you're gonna get a chance to try it and see if you love it too.

brit 35:44

Yeah. So, It's almost like you were putting it out into the universe that you wanted me-

josh 35:50

in your life. I need a foodie.

brit 35:53

You needed a foodie. Yeah. I also needed a foodie, so-

josh 35:58

Do you think that for others, and maybe even yourself, do you think if someone else is going to do a solo travel for the first time, or thinking about yourself again, a domestic trip somewhere in the United States by yourself would be easier or would have made it harder? It's a unique question with today's climate in the United States. Some people might be like, "Oh, well, of course, United States, like, it could be safer." But I mean, that's definitely not the case.

brit 36:28

That's definitely not true, no. Mm-hmm. I am really glad that it was somewhere- Where it was safer than the US.

josh 36:35

Yeah.

brit 36:35

Had it been in the US, I think I would be more afraid of gun violence-

josh 36:40

Mm. Sure

brit 36:41

than anything.

josh 36:43

Yeah.

brit 36:43

So.

josh 36:44

But you can always pick a place. Like, if you would've planned a trip and chosen Galena, would you have liked that? Would that have been really fun? You know, go and do another ghost tour, which we love doing, and hang out there for a couple days.

brit 36:57

Maybe I should do that. I really love Galena. Galena is a town in Illinois that, uh, is well known for having some spooky stuff. Mm-hmm. So it's our kinda town.

josh 37:12

And we've been to it a few times. So do you think maybe something like that for yourself or someone else- I don't- doing a solo trip would work, or no?

brit 37:20

I can only speak for me. I think for me, I needed the jolting, immersive cultural experience from somewhere out of the US.

josh 37:31

Absolutely.

brit 37:32

From somewhere where I don't speak the language, I, don't know the food, I don't know anybody there-

josh 37:42

Mm-hmm

brit 37:42

or anybody there within six hours by plane,

josh 37:46

so Minimum.

brit 37:47

Yeah, minimum. I think it was really important for me to go that far. I- and I don't know that I would've had the same outcome and the same experience had it been, like, Galena, 'cause that's three hours by car.

josh 38:03

A place that's really in a bubble for you.

brit 38:06

Yeah, a place where I am so secluded by not being around people I know, would protect me.

josh 38:16

Mm-hmm.

brit 38:17

And the only person that could protect me is myself. I could only rely on myself.

josh 38:22

Yeah.

brit 38:22

And I think it was so important for me to go and do that in another country.

josh 38:26

Yeah. I think somewhere in my mind that was for me, too. wasn't in the forefront of my mind, but Yeah. Like, I just need to go do something crazy. Yeah. You know? I call it self-destructive, but I was just taking, taking a leap.

brit 38:39

You know, I, I think sometimes when you're in your younger 20s and you're doing things that may have felt self-destructive, you learn so much from those things.

josh 38:50

Mm-hmm.

brit 38:51

I think maybe there's some gratitude to be had for those poor decisions that you made. But also, like Thailand I'm sure was great.

josh 39:01

Maybe our 30-year-olds can learn a little bit from our early 20 20-year-olds-

brit 39:07

Yeah

josh 39:08

in that, in that instance if we-

brit 39:10

Maybe

josh 39:10

if we had the opportunity to make those good life decisions. Do you want to do more solo travel?

brit 39:18

I do. However, I do think that it would be really fun, I did say this before, I think it would be really fun for us to, like, go do... say we went to Portugal again. You're in Porto, I'm in Aveiro, and then we meet and we show each other what we learned. Mm. I think that would be so fun in another country.

josh 39:41

Yeah.

brit 39:42

Um-

josh 39:43

That is a really good idea. That is.

brit 39:46

I really love that idea. Mm-hmm. The more I think about it, the more I'm like, "Wow, that is so us."

josh 39:51

Mm-hmm.

brit 39:51

Because we also, I feel like, have been, like, within our relationship, we have also been gaining so much independence. at least for me, I'm not trying to rely on you for so much, as much as I was.

josh 40:08

Mm-hmm.

brit 40:09

I think that a sense of independence within our travel is also important because independence should be a part of everything in your life. And we are so passionate about traveling, so it makes sense to me that we would include some sort of independent travel.

josh 40:28

Yep. that's like doing solo travel without, like, fully doing solo travel.

brit 40:33

That's true. That is true, yeah.

josh 40:35

Do you think you would do a more full solo travel experience, like going there, being there, coming back all on your own?

brit 40:45

Yeah. I mean, I think I would enjoy it. I think it would be kind of a bummer to not have you there because, like I've talked about, I, when I was experiencing new things, I was like, "Oh my God, this is so much fun." And then I was like, "Boo would love this, and I hate that he's not experiencing this new-

josh 41:04

Mm-hmm

brit 41:05

new adventure- Right with me." Right. So.

josh 41:07

Yeah.

brit 41:08

I think it would be fun- Mm-hmm yes, and I would do it. but I would much rather do a whole trip with you. What about you?

josh 41:16

I for sure would do a, a solo trip. I am in the exact same boat though, where I love to share those new experiences with you.

brit 41:26

Yeah.

josh 41:26

It's something that if you go and do a solo trip when you're in a relationship It's like any other time. Like, if you're gone for a couple days and I'm, I'm here and I'm doing life by myself, I'm like, "Aw Like yeah, having some alone time is nice, but I'm watching this TV show. Oh, you would like this. Or- you know, get a pizza. Oh, you like pizza. You know?

brit 41:53

Who doesn't like pizza?

josh 41:55

Just, just all these things that you like to do as well, and I like to share those experiences. Just like you were saying. But it's also nice to remind yourself, like, "I can do this. These are the things I like." I think it's... That's what I was kinda looking for. It's a refresher of what do you like about yourself. Mm-hmm. What do you like to do? 'Cause sometimes, and for us for sure, we get so locked into, lockstep.

brit 42:21

Yeah

josh 42:21

we're like, "Oh, we'll go to this place together." "Yeah, let's go to this place. We'll go do this thing." "Yeah, let's go do this thing." And our minds just kinda mold together, and every once in a while, just to remind ourselves, like, we are individuals, we are separate people. Let's go do this thing on our own. Oh yeah, I like this. I like doing this. Oh, this reminds me of my fiance. You know? I wish, I wish she was here to do this with.

brit 42:45

Well, and I think that's so important to have that within your relationships, like a sense of independence. Because if you're, if you're not able to have that-

josh 42:56

Mm-hmm

brit 42:56

then you do kind of like mold into one another, and it's hard to differentiate, like, who you are-

josh 43:05

Mm-hmm

brit 43:06

at that point.

josh 43:07

It's like that, what's that new James Franco movie that came out?

brit 43:11

Oh, Together.

josh 43:12

Together.

brit 43:13

Oh, that's a creepy movie. That was weird. Such a weird movie- but yes.

josh 43:18

Yeah. Yes. That's the metaphor for the movie, so...

brit 43:24

It is, yeah. Mm-hmm. And it totally makes sense. Like, you need a sense of independence, and even when you're in a very healthy and loving relationship, you need to give each other some space- Because we're always evolving, we're always exploring, we're always ever-growing, changing beings.

josh 43:44

Mm-hmm.

brit 43:45

And we're not gonna be able to fully grow and explore the way we need to if we're always with one a- one another. So my advice to anybody in a relationship that's feeling codependent is go do a solo travel adventure, then go back. Or have your partner meet you there.

josh 44:04

Yeah.

brit 44:04

After a couple days.

josh 44:05

Yeah.

brit 44:06

Or you two go to different places and then you meet up, and then you show each other what you learned.

josh 44:10

I love that. Maybe if we put this out there, when we put this out there, someone will comment and say they did it, and they can let us know how it went 'cause-

brit 44:20

Yeah

josh 44:20

I would like-

brit 44:21

That

josh 44:21

sounds great I would like to know if someone did, how it went 'cause, I mean, it just sounds cool.

brit 44:25

It does. Yeah. It sounds like a really fun experience to n- kind of have the best of both worlds, and I love that.

josh 44:33

Mm.

brit 44:34

Because then you're also experiencing new things at the same time that I'm experiencing new things, and I don't know that I would have that, uh, feeling of, Oh, Boo would love this too," because you're doing something that I would love to

josh 44:49

Yeah.

brit 44:50

So yeah. Maybe it would be, because you're saying it wouldn't be a full travel, a, a full solo travel, with us being so close together, so maybe it would be, like, a different country.

josh 45:05

Mm.

brit 45:05

So, like...

josh 45:06

Wow, logistics of that would be crazy.

brit 45:09

Well, I mean, if they're right next to each other, like Portugal and Spain.

josh 45:13

Oh, true. Like connecting... Oh, that's... I don't know why my first thought went different country, plane.

brit 45:20

I mean, well, you could, but you can also just take a train.

josh 45:24

Take a train. Yeah.

brit 45:26

Yeah.

josh 45:26

We could, we could do Scotland and the UK. We could do... Mm-hmm.

brit 45:31

I call Scotland.

josh 45:35

You might have to have a car.

brit 45:37

Oh, fuck that. Nope.

josh 45:41

Maybe, maybe not the best place.

brit 45:42

I'll take a bus.

josh 45:43

Yeah. There you go. Oh, man. Is there anything more about your solo travel adventure, any suggestions for people, anything at all that we've missed that you wanna talk about or that you think we should say?

brit 45:56

I think that we're leaving a lot out, but I can't think of everything right now. And obviously there w- there's so much that I'm still processing-

josh 46:06

Mm-hmm

brit 46:06

from the solo travel that I've learned about myself, and some of it is only for me and my therapist's ears. So I mean, for real though. So, um, I'll just leave that there. But I, I truly think it was such an empowering and life-changing decision for me to do this trip and go alone. I think it was so powerful, and I really recommend women who are in the boat that I was in of, lacking a sense of independence, feeling fearful of doing things alone, because we do live in an environment where women are so easily taken advantage of.

josh 46:59

Mm-hmm.

brit 46:59

And so It was really empowering for me to do this alone and say, you know, basically my fear is valid, but I can't let it control my life. And that's what this kind of taught me. So I recommend women to do this. Not just women, I mean anyone to go solo travel, but particularly women in the US who are afraid. I think you should go solo travel.

josh 47:30

Yeah. Uh, you have the perspective for it, so absolutely.

brit 47:33

Yeah.

josh 47:34

Mm-hmm.

brit 47:34

And it was fun. You learn about yourself and you have fun. Yeah. And you get to drink wine, so

josh 47:43

I think those are the three boxes to check.

brit 47:46

Yeah. What about you? Anything else?

josh 47:51

I think Our two stories take up the most bit of this podcast episode. Mm-hmm. you can see both ways from a perspective of a lack of planning and kind of a free fall sort of trip like mine, and yours was a little more curated, but still open to lots of new things, that you can have great life-changing experiences either way.

brit 48:19

Absolutely.

josh 48:19

So don't feel like you have to do it any certain way. Just be safe and go do it.

brit 48:25

Yes. Be safe.

josh 48:26

Mm-hmm.

brit 48:27

Be safe, look it up, do some research.

josh 48:30

Mm-hmm.

brit 48:31

And do a food tour.

josh 48:32

And do a food tour. Do a food tour-

brit 48:34

If you can

josh 48:34

early on.

brit 48:35

Yeah. Yeah. Well, next episode we will be talking about our financial travel tips, so some tips that we might have to save you some money traveling. these tips have definitely saved us some money.

josh 48:51

Absolutely. And like this episode, we're definitely gonna miss some, but I'm sure we'll have mo- more episodes about it in the future as well.

brit 48:58

Yeah.

josh 48:58

Mm-hmm.

brit 48:59

I feel like we always sprinkle some throughout our traveling experiences anyways, so.

josh 49:04

Absolutely.

brit 49:05

Don't forget to like, subscribe and follow on TikTok, Instagram, and YouTube @WSMHtravels

josh 49:13

You can listen to our podcast on Apple, Spotify and YouTube. YouTube is where we have our video record version, including pictures and videos from our trips. Please continue to leave your comments and send us messages on what you liked from our trips and suggestions for future trips. We really appreciate it.

brit 49:31

Thank you so much for listening. Until next time.