LOVE & GO: 12 Powerful Truths for a Blessed Life with Frank Kelly - Part 1

In Part 1 of this conversation, Steve Harrison sits down with CEO, former professional lacrosse player, and author Frank Kelly to explore what it really means to pursue excellence while walking closely with God. Frank shares the remarkable story of how God used a crushing disappointment as a  Cornell athlete to change his life.   Along the way, he offers practical insights from his new book, Love & Go: 12 Powerful Truths for a Blessed Life, including such life-changing practices as "popcorn prayer," journaling and the power of praise.  If you've ever wrestled with balancing ambition and surrender, this episode will encourage and challenge you.

About Frank Kelly: Frank Kelly is CEO of Kelly Benefits, a family-owned company with about 500 employees. A graduate of Cornell University and former professional lacrosse player, he has devoted his life to integrating faith, leadership, business, and service. Frank serves in leadership roles with numerous nonprofit organizations, including Fellowship of Christian Athletes. He is the author of Love & Go: 12 Powerful Truths for a Blessed Life, a practical and deeply personal guide to growing closer to God and living with purpose.  Get your copy here:  https://a.co/d/07SR7AyA

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Workship, where we talk about achieving dreams God's way. And this guest really represents so much of what we talk about. He understands the tension between striving and trying to achieve, whether you're trying to win on the athletic field, whether you're trying to grow your business, make it more profitable, achieve goals, and at the same time walk in the spirit. Glorify God. Let him lead. And so we're going to talk about that with Frank Kelly. Frank is the CEO of Kelly Benefits, a family business. He leads with his three brothers. He's a graduate of Cornell University. He's been a scholarship athlete and even a professional athlete. He has had tremendous success in lacrosse, played professional indoor lacrosse. He serves on the boards of in leadership roles for many nonprofit organizations. One is Fellowship of Christian Athletes. And he's the author of Look and See, an Influence in the Creator's Game, My Story and Stories of Family, Faith, and Lacrosse. And also was wonderful for I loved working with him on this book, Love and Go, 12 Powerful Truths for a Blessed Life. And I can tell you that I know Frank is dedicated to uh doing his very, very best because he really did. We often talk about in writing. Writing is rewriting and re-editing and getting things. But you did it, man. Congratulations.

SPEAKER_01 1:34

Well, thanks, Steve. I'm honored and thankful to be here with you on the podcast. And I'm really grateful for the way God used you in my life to help me better understand in particular how to tell and write about stories. And as you know, storytelling is very important. And um, I feel like I learned a lot from you, and I thank you for it.

SPEAKER_00 1:54

Well, it really shows up in the book big time. I mean, for to give people some background, you would say, Look, I just could we would often, and this is common, you know, for authors, is we'll say, Look, you got great information here, dude. Yeah, you know, but but we need to know a little bit more about you. And and you, and you would say, and this is very common, you know, it's like, well, I I just I don't want to make it about me. I just want to speak truth into people's lives, you know, and and that's true. That's that was your motive. You know, you this wasn't like look at me, look at me, but um, kind of like giving testimony to the Lord. People want to know what you've been through and and what you've learned. So, and then how you tell those stories in in book form. Um, yeah, what let's just talk about that for a moment. So it you you decided and committed to, hey, okay, I do need to share more of myself, not just things I've learned and and whatnot. Right. Um talk a little bit about that. We're talking about achieving goals and writing this book and making it really good was was a key. So, what's something you had to overcome in doing that?

SPEAKER_01 3:00

Yeah, well, you know, I guess going back in time, I never envisioned myself ever writing a book. Um, I had no real passion or desire to. During COVID, um, you know, our business kind of shut down. Um, man, uh, you know, uh essential employees only on site and working remote. Um, you know, so I had more time, and I would take these long walks and um we'd make calls and started taking pictures of birds and flowers. And then some people on my team thought they were really cool. And we put that into a book called Look and See. Um, the bird, look at the birds of the air, see the flowers of the field. And it's kind of a faith-based coffee table book, and that led to me helping write a book about my dad, which led to writing influence. But this book I'm really excited about, Love and Go. Um, and you know, it's kind of love is you know, really comes from the the scriptures. If you were to look at the Bible and say, can you summarize the Bible in one sentence, Genesis to Revelation? You know, it would be this. Um, you know, Jesus said, Love the Lord your God with all your heart, your soul, your mind, and your strength, and love your neighbor as yourself. Love God completely, love others compassionately, love yourself correctly. And, you know, for me, you and I have talked, you know, a bit of my story, but as a 20-year-old sophomore, that light went on. I went from, you know, having a little religion in my life to a relationship with God that was based on love. And I began to glow grow in a love relationship with God, which impacted the way I loved and had compassion and empathy for others. And it even helped me better understand how to properly and appropriately love myself because we're all created in the image of God. And then the second word is go, you know. Uh, that would be another key command in the scriptures is to go and make disciples. I like to say, go and share God's love in truth and word and deed. So, you know, 42 years ago, the spiritual light bulb went on. I'm a 20-year-old sophomore Cornell. Six months later, I go to my first Bible study. I'd never been to one. I was very nervous. Um, I went and I had this little Bible I'd never give from my dad that had a note in it. I'd read the note, but not the Bible. And literally the first two Bible studies, I never got to a single verse that they said, turn to Ephesians, turn here. I'm like, I don't know where we are. I finally got a Bible with big tabs sticking out the side so I could get my way around. But I began to see kind of, I didn't know it at the time, but love and go in action. And over the next 40 to some years, um, I became an avid note taker. And every sermon I've ever heard, I've taken notes. Every time I've talked to you, I've taken notes. And I distilled 40 years of the best notes and quotes into this book, Love and Go, into 12 Powerful Truths for a Blessed Life. So, you know, like um any book, it was a labor of love. I think I I don't know exactly who made the quote, uh said the quote, but writing a book is like giving birth to barbed wire. Um, at first I'm like, that's not true, but I can tell you for me, after a dozen, 12, 13 drafts or 14 drafts to make it better and better, it was definitely a labor of love.

SPEAKER_00 5:55

So yeah. Well, and the love also shows up in that dedication to writing and rewriting because it's so well put together. You know, you've got these these 12 um powerful truths. Um, and they're, you know, you you you got like, you know, the power of God's word, the power of praise, the power of prayer, the power of the Holy Spirit, and um on and on everything is, and you're just so you're distilling down um what you have learned, as you said, as a journaler. Talk about journaling for a second. Um, that's go talk about that.

SPEAKER_01 6:32

Yeah. Well, um, you know, one of the chapters is the power of prayer. And um, you know, I grew up more in a faith tradition where you recited prayers at church on Sunday, and maybe you said, Grace, bless us the Lord, for these are gifts. You know, it was kind of a rote thing you did. And I began to understand after I started to grow in this relationship with God, you know, and I I I, you know, I heard the distance between religion and relationship is 18 inches from your head to your heart. So when it went to my heart and I began to grow, I began to learn that prayer is really communication with God. It's it's talking to Him, but also listening. And I'm one my mind races a lot. And because I started taking notes, um, some of my friends were journalers. And I have developed kind of for me a discipline that's helped me focus a little bit. Um, you know, a couple times a week, I'll just write a letter to God. Love letter to God, thank you, note to God. Um, and it's a way for me to concentrate and focus my prayers. Um, I talk in that chapter about a little acronym ACTS Axe, you know, uh adoration, then confession, then thanksgiving, supplication. By the way, those four things come out of the most famous prayer of all, the Lord's prayer, our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. It's really adoration, confession, thanksgiving, supplication. And and then I sometimes put a little L and you know, for listening, I will record what I sense God's trying to say to me. Um, there's a quote from a Catholic priest in the book, Henry Nowan, that he said when he would sit down, he it was so hard to be quiet. And he would he would frantically want to make that call and you know to keep himself busy. And he talked about what he called monkeys in a banana tree, monkeys hopping around. And I could relate to monkeys in my head. You know, I sit down to pray and I'm like, I gotta call Steve. Oh my gosh, I forgot to do this. You know, I'm writing notes to myself. So journaling has actually helped me better focus my prayer. And I don't know, I I I I love writing thank you notes to God.

SPEAKER_00 8:24

I loved that, you know, writing thank you notes to God. What a great journaling, but also, and you gave the you know that that great formula, and your whole book is is like that. You know, it's like here are these things. Some people, you know, I've heard okay, you know, the power of praise. We've kind of heard certain things, but are you doing it? And are you doing it? You know, you really give people these things that have been helpful to you to to to live the spiritual life, to to to so God can can enter more into your life. Talk about, like, for example, like you have a thing that you learned, and what's great is you know, we often say the this life is well, if we have the attitude of one beggar telling another beggar where to find food, it's that's what we're all doing, right? Exactly. And and so in your book is so it's like wow, 40 years of like, here's some of the best stuff that's helped Frank and others. One of the things you talk about is popcorn prayer, right?

SPEAKER_01 9:24

Yeah, you know, and it's interesting. Um, like any relationship, in order to have a strong relationship, you've got to communicate, right? And like you and I have gotten to know each other better and better. I just started off watching a I think a free online, you know, uh video. And I'm like, yeah, this guy seems legit. And then I reached out and then we talked more and we got to know each other. It's the same with God. He wants us to grow our relationship with him. I went away to a retreat, um, kind of a faith-based retreat um that was deep in nature. And I came away with this practical application. I and my wife was with me, and it was called popcorn prayer. And lots of times we think, you know, our prayers need to be eloquent and you know, but they they really don't. And with popcorn prayer, it's just a way to kind of go back and forth with little prayers, not long prayers. So, you know, I um I've done it a lot with teams I've coached, fellowship of Christian athletes teams at the end of a game. Let's just pop, pop, pop little prayers of thanks to God. Thank you, God, for the game. Thank you, God, that we won or lost. Thank you, God, for the officials. Thank you for my parents who brought me to the game. Thank you for this beautiful field that we take for granted. Thank you for the game of lacrosse. Thank you for my teammate. Lord, thank you for Joey, please heal his ankle. You know, that uh thank you, Lord, for my parents, please help my mom. Just little pop, pop, pop, pop prayers. And I know my wife and I have gotten in the discipline for at least 15 years every day. Every day. Um, if we're not in person, I'll call her um almost every day. Sometimes things happen, but you know, we'll begin our day with just some popcorn prayer going back and forth. And, you know, there's these statistics. Um, as we all know, in our country today, you know, half of all marriages will end in divorce. Um, you know, 75% of second marriages end in divorce, but less than 1% of marriages end in divorce for couples who pray together. And it's amazing, even people of faith, they don't necessarily pray every day together with their spouse. And we'll go back and forth. Like we'll begin just thank you for this, thank you for this. God, you are amazing. Thank you, thank you. And then, hey, Gail, I've got a need today. I'm doing an interview with Steve Harrison on his podcast. Would you pray for? We prayed today. She prayed for me today. She's at a board meeting in Colorado. She had to do a devotional. I prayed for her devotional. And it's just back and forth, real quick, not deep, not heavy, but simple and a fun way to pray.

SPEAKER_00 11:38

Simple and doable. So, like for people who think, hey, I'd like to do this with my spouse, or I'd like to do this with my family around the table or a group. How do you do it? So, if we're doing popcorn prayer, like what do you say to me? How do we get that going? Just take us through.

SPEAKER_01 11:56

All right. Well, why don't we do it real quick? Okay. Um, let's just, Steve, why don't we do some popcorn prayers? We'll just do some things we're thankful for. And short, not long. So you go, then I'll go, then you go, then I'll go.

SPEAKER_00 12:07

Okay. Okay. Perfect. I'll go first. Is that right? I'm going first. Okay. You go first. Yeah. Lord, I thank you for this beautiful, beautiful day that you have made.

SPEAKER_01 12:17

Lord, thank you for our wives and children. Bless and protect them this day.

SPEAKER_00 12:23

Lord, thank you for the gift of technology that gets us speaking together and being able to share this.

SPEAKER_01 12:30

Lord, thank you for Steve Harrison and the experience you've given him and his brother and Jack to help people tell their story and write and well and share your love and truth in practical ways. And thank you for the way you've used him in my life.

SPEAKER_00 12:43

And Lord, thank you for dreams that you put on our heart and the power to persist and um and and the fact that you guide us.

SPEAKER_01 12:53

Amen. And as Steve prayed, Lord, thank you for this technology that lets us share stories and truth with people around the world. We praise you.

SPEAKER_00 13:01

Amen. Amen.

SPEAKER_01 13:02

Look at that.

SPEAKER_00 13:03

Look at that.

SPEAKER_01 13:04

I love doing it with my teams. I, you know, I've coached like 9-8, 9-10, 11-12, 13-14. And you know, a lot of people are uncomfortable praying out loud. You know, even again, my faith tradition, you you you pray at church, you maybe pray over a meal, but not articulate. And there becomes a freedom and a joy when we begin to communicate with God in that way. And I love doing it with my with teams that I've coached and and different groups I've been a part of.

SPEAKER_00 13:30

So fantastic. Yes, that's so great. Now, I remember um we were talking about stories, you know, stories that you I remember there, and I I was thinking about what are the stories that I want Frank to be sure to share. Um, and uh a couple came to mind. One is that you kind of is you you grew up in the church, you grew up Catholic, you know. Yeah, yep, Catholic. There was a there was a time um, you know, on a lacrosse field, you are a scholarship athlete at Cornell. Um, and I often find that, you know, part of why I'm doing this uh the show workship is because I think as we pursue goals, God enters in. Uh, you know, you know, we we learn we can learn a lot. Sometimes it's through success, sometimes it's through struggle. You you really came to know the Lord even better uh on a lacrosse field in college. Share that story.

SPEAKER_01 14:31

Yeah, well, I flash back to growing up here in the Baltimore area, um playing sports, you know, that and I have three younger brothers, but we're like a year apart, bang, bang, bang. So we had two-on-two everything at all times in our backyard. Even in church, we would do two-on-two things. But um, you know, probably middle school, high school, I was playing football. High school, I started playing lacrosse and um, you know, started to get pretty good at both. And, you know, learned you, you know, you score touchdowns or goals, people like you, give you attaboys, it elevates your kind of uh platform or influence. And I I um for me, for me, sport kind of went from being a game to a god, little g god, like an idol. And um, it was weird. Like in high school, I started the field. I just was never like satisfied. If I had a touchdown, I should have had two. If I scored a goal, I should have had three. I can't believe I missed a shot. It was very focused on the things I didn't do as opposed to the blessings I did have. So I I had some great opportunities. I I did have like a scholarship at the University of Virginia. I got into Harvard and I chose Cornell, and they were able to get me some little leadership grant because you don't get athletic scholarships in the Ivy League, but um, you know, and one of the reasons I picked Cornell is I could still play football on lacrosse. And so my first year, I I go there and I'm playing football. And uh remember the athletic director met with us and said, Hey, there's only there's three things you can do here, but you can only do two well. You can be a student and an athlete and fulfill your potential in the classroom and on the athletic field. You can be a student and a party boy, and you will not fulfill your potential as an athlete. You're gonna get injured, or you can be an athlete and a party boy and you will fail out. And I remember sitting in the group going, I'm gonna try all three for sure. And um, and he was right, it didn't work. Um, you know, and at the end last play of the last practice in my freshman year of football, I had a weird injury. This guy stepped on my foot, led to a limp, carried all the way into lacrosse season. I was limping. Um, I played my entire freshman year with shin splints because I was partying, I was losing weight. Um, coach was all over me. All of a sudden, the coaches didn't think I was as good as I thought I was, and definitely not as good as they told me I was when they recruited me. And I'm getting no playing time. Um, you know, I had a situation my freshman year, I'll never forget it. Cornell, we're playing Syracuse in the dome, and I'm I'm I'm on like the third midfield line, so I'm on the edge of playing time in my mind. And um, my mom and dad came up, my brothers came up, my high school girlfriend came up. I just joined fraternity, they were all there, and we're warming up, and I'm feeling pretty good. And the coach comes to me and says, Hey, Kelly, um, and he came to one other player and said, Hey, there's a new Ivy League rule. We can only dress 25, and there's 27 of you. I need you to go in the locker room and put on your street clothes. And I'm like, What? You gotta be kidding me, coach. I mean, I I was in shock. I came out and I just spent two hours trying not to cry on the sideline with my little coat and tie on. I couldn't even remember the game. But that was the process of God beginning to want to strip me. Um, I remember a story, Steve, of a father who gave his little daughter a set of plastic pearls. She loved them and they were they were nice, but over time they got chipped and broken. And when she got older and was maturing, he he he went to her and he said, Hey, give me, give me those plastic pearls, honey. And she held on so tight to those plastic pearls. But over time, you know, he he pried her little fingers off and took those pearls and then gave her a set of real pearls. That's what he wanted. I was holding on to these plastic pearls so tight. You know, football, my uh sophomore year, um, stress fractures again. I missed the season. My God was crumbling. I was dying inside lacrosse season. I'm three weeks in, I'm still on third, fourth string as a sophomore and coaches all over me. And I was in a line drill and got humiliated in front of the team three times. I got the ball taken from me, stripped three times. We went to the end of a line drill. And as God does, he's so good. He often puts people in our lives at different times. And he he put an all-American wrestler, and one of my football teammates began talking to me about having a relationship with God. And I'm like, I'm kind of religious. I go to church sometimes. You know, there was a Sunday night at 5 p.m. Mass. We called it the hangover mass. I went, usually hungover, and I believed in God. I just didn't understand the concept of a relationship with him. And my parents had had a spiritual awakening too. And my dad began to talk to me about like surrendering my life to him. And he told me, Frankie, until your relationship with God is your top priority through his son Jesus Christ, you won't have peace. You can't find it on the football field, the cross field, the party scene. Academically, when you graduate, the money's not going to do it, climbing the ladder. Only you can only have that peace through a right relationship with God. And again, it just kind of went in one ear and out the other, but a little residue stuck. So that one day, after I got stripped three times with all the pain and injuries and coaches, I went to the end of that line drill and I just said, Lord, you know, if I never ever play football to lacrosse again, I want a relationship with you. I don't I don't even know what it means. I don't know if I'm supposed to receive you, believe you, but come, I want you in my life. And it was interesting. Uh, that night, uh that day, I didn't see lightning, I didn't hear thunder, but things began to change. I went home that night, called my dad. He was actually in the Maryland State Senate, so he was in Annapolis at the time. And he said, Frankie, that's the best decision you'll ever make in your life. And you and he said, I've got one piece of practical advice for you. And it's gonna sound crazy, but begin to praise the Lord every spare second you have. Like when you're walking across campus, praise them and thank them that you can see, that you can walk, that you're at Cornell. When you get to practice, praise them that you're on the team. Thank them for your teammates, thank them that you're at you have the ability to play. And it's interesting that next day I walked up on that, I went to practice. I'll never forget, we're five minutes in. I made a mistake, coach had my helmet and I was yelling at me, and but I had complete and total peace. I went from anger and frustration to a peace. And um, it was crazy. Three weeks later, I didn't make a deal with God. My deal was if I never play again, he miraculously gave lacrosse back to me and ended up starting three years. That wasn't part of the deal. But one of the chapters is the power of praise, because there's a scripture in the Psalms that says God inhabits the praise of his people. When we praise him, we invite him into our situations, he inhabits the praise of his people. So, you know, he doesn't say to praise him for all circumstances, but to praise him in all circumstances. So, again, another little practical truth. So, like the whole book is just full of practical truths. I basically wrote the book to myself before, and I'm not like a rocket scientist, so it's not a hyperintellectual book, although I do pull some quotes from some smart people, but I'm not trying to impress anybody, I'm trying to just share practical truth that's relevant, like something like that, the power of praise, you know, popcorn prayer. And um, it's incredible. That was the day I went from religion to relationship, and I I didn't really grow. Six months later, I came back as a junior. That football teammate invited me to a Bible study that I nervously went to. I think I have this Bible. I do, I have it up on this shelf right here. My God had given this to me in 1977. I was 13. Christmas. Dear Frank, the solutions to any problem are in this great book. Try to read a chapter each day of your life, and you'll be happy. The words in this book come directly from God through his Holy Spirit to you. All areas of your life, and you will be guaranteed success. Pray regularly, Frank, and always remember how much I love you. Dad, I had read the note, I just never read the Bible. So we went to the I went to that first Bible study. I had this little Bible, and my friend said, All right, everybody, there were only seven or eight of us. Let's turn in our Bibles to Ephesians chapter six or whatever. I'm like, Oh my, I have absolutely no idea. And um, I was sitting next to this girl. Oh my gosh. I still I remember I came in that night and it was at Sigma Chai Fraternity, and the first person I see is this girl who I'd seen Saturday night at like three in the morning, and because I was still partying and in the scene. I was I like at that point, I was on the fence. I had definitely had one foot in the Christian world. I was one foot committed to Christ, but one foot still in the world. And I saw her and I didn't say a word, and she we didn't even, I'm like, what are you doing here? And she's thinking, What are you doing here? And but I I the guy said, Turn to Ephesians and that group. We kind of little chatter, and I turned to the girl next to me. I'm like, excuse me, can you tell me or show me where Ephesians is? And she says, Oh, it's really easy. Just remember, go eat popcorn. I'm like, What? She goes, Yeah, Galatians, Ephesians, Philippians, Colossians, go eat popcorn. Ephesians is right after Galatians. Well, of course, I don't know where Galatians is, so I never got to one verse. I just faked it. I saw which and I never said a word my first two Bible studies. But I I kind of share that in that first chapter, the power of God's word, because the the Bible about itself says the word of God is living, it's active, it's living. And you've got all those books behind you. I got books. Not all those words are living. I mean, they they do, they tell a story, but God's Bible, it's not just a religious religious relic. I had this like as a good luck charm. I kept it in my little nightstand. I never read it, but I did read the note from time to time. And that's the other thing, just the power of a written word, you know.

SPEAKER_00 23:46

And that's your and that's a letter from your dad, right?

SPEAKER_01 23:48

That's from my dad, and that's then that's in my book, right? Yes, you know, it's interesting. We remember what we record. And the other quote I love is a dull pencil is better than a sharp mind. A dull pencil is better than a sharp nine. So one of the reasons I take notes in quotes, because I forget. And I'll go to a church service, hear a great sermon, or you know, go to an incredible place and hear people speak, you know, be like, it was awesome. What did he say? Well, I can remember some of it. And you know, statistically, we forget a lot quickly. Within one day, we forget half of it. Within three, we forget 75%. But if you write it down, you you you'll drive it, and then you can always go back and reference it, which for me is helpful. And that's how I wrote my book. I went to 40 years of journals and took the best of my notes and quotes.

SPEAKER_00 24:32

So I hope you've been enjoying this interview with Frank Kelly, a CEO, former professional athlete, and devoted follower of Christ. My interview with him was so good that I decided to air the rest of it as part two of our next episode. He'll share what God taught him when he went through a major personal crisis. I'll also ask him, should athletes pray to win the game? You may be surprised by his answer. He'll share some of the highlights from his book Love and Go, 12 Powerful Truths for a Blessed Life. You know, it was my honor to consult with Frank as he worked on this book, and you will love it. It's full of heart, scripture, practical truth that you can apply to your life. It's the kind of book where you can find something useful on every page. So if you want to walk more closely with God, experience his power, and have him use you to achieve more for his kingdom and his glory. Well, don't delay. Go right now to Amazon. Get your copy of Love and Go by Frank Kelly. That's Love and Go by Frank Kelly. And definitely check out our next episode of Workship Achieve Dreams God's Way, where you'll hear part two of my interview with Frank Kelly. But right now, go get a copy of his book. Think about it. He's been journaling and taking notes for 40 years. And in this book, you get the best, most helpful insights. So stop everything. Go and get the book now so that you too, with the Lord's help, can love and go.