The Story Behind The Song | Her Last Breath

In Week 3 of The Story Behind The Song, Ray Slavens shares the deeply personal story behind the song "Her Last Breath."

Written in memory of his sister Jessica, this song was inspired by her long battle with illness, pain, and the effects of trauma. For more than twenty years, Jessica faced health challenges that eventually led to her passing. Yet through it all, one question she often asked remained the inspiration behind this song:

"What's it going to be like when I die?"

The answer was always found in God's Word:

"To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord."
— 2 Corinthians 5:8

In this episode, Ray reflects on the relationship he shared with his sister, the gift of reconciliation during their later years, and the hope Christians have in the promise of eternal life.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Shoes Off, a weekly podcast where we pause, take off what weighs us down, and take a step onto holy ground. Hey, welcome back to Shoes Off. Some songs come from joy, some come from memories, and then some songs are written from loss. And this song, which I called Her Last Breath, was really written out of losing my sister, Jessica, just a few months ago. Over the last 20 years, Jessica battled so much. She had physical pain, she suffered from lung disease, she had mental health struggles, and she had the effects of trauma over certain situations that happened over her life. And toward the end her quality of life became really limited. But the one question she would often ask me was, What's gonna be like when I die? And I would always come back to the same promise found in Scripture, 2 Corinthians 5 and 8. It says to be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord. And that verse became really the heartbeat behind this song, because for those of us who belong to Christ, death is not the end of our story. So the story behind the song, Her Last Breath, is about my sister who recently passed. I only have one sibling. And Jessica and I weren't always close. I mean, we grew up in, I would say, a normal family in a normal household. But Jessica was married at 16, and life just took us down different paths. Some years I felt like we were close together, and other years felt miles apart. And it mentions that in the song. But one of the greatest gifts that God gave us was in our 40s, it felt like a period of restoration. He brought us back together, and that's just a time I'm really grateful for. Because some of my sweetest memories with my sister came during those last few years. We got to take her on a vacation in Jamaica, she got to jump off of a cliff, and really experience things that maybe was a bucket list item. But during those last few years, especially over the last 18 months before she passed, I just saw her suffer. I watched her lose things that most people and most of us take for granted. But I did watch her hold on to faith, which is why one line in the song really means so much to me. I wrote in there, all the hurt that you carried, all the pain that you bore will be no more. Because that's the promise that we can hold on to. That's just not wishful thinking. Jessica and I would text, and no one knew the amount of pain that she had on a daily basis. No one knew all the hurt and all the trauma that she carried around. But all of that is no more now. And that's truly God's promise that He's given us. Revelation 21 and 4 says He will wipe every tear away from our eyes. And there'll be no more death or mourning or crying or pain. Man, what a promise God has given us. And it heaven is more real than we think. That's that's kind of the first thought I want to share with you. I think sometimes we talk so much about this life that we forget that we're actually headed somewhere. Paul reminds us in Philippians 3 and 20 that our citizenship is in heaven, and many times in the scripture it talks about us being pilgrims and strangers. And for believers in Jesus Christ, heaven isn't just a fantasy, it's actually our home. And one day every struggle, every disease, every burden that we have, every worry will just be behind us, and we'll be in the presence of God Almighty. The other thought I want to leave with you is goodbye here is not forever. And I believe that with all my heart because Jesus defeated death in John 11 and 25, Jesus said, I am the resurrection and the life. Whosoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live. And for us that are believers, the cemetery isn't the end. It's just a temporary separation between us that are alive and those that have gone on. But you can guarantee there will be a reunion in heaven. And man, what a reunion that's gonna be. The last thought I want to leave with you is God restores relationships. One thing that I'm thankful for is that God mended the relationship between my sister and me during her last years. And maybe that's a lesson for someone listening today. Maybe you have a relationship that you need to restore. Don't wait. Life is fragile, we aren't promised tomorrow. The time to forgive is now, and maybe you need to make that call today, or maybe you need to reach out and just say I love you because one line in this song in the bridge says tell everyone I love them. And I meant that when I don't know what heaven's gonna be like, but if she was able to see grandma and grandpa and dad that's already gone on, just tell them that I'll I'll meet them soon and that I love them. One day we're gonna take this journey too. I wrote in there that Jessica was on an oxygen machine, she really couldn't breathe, but there's gonna be a day that I'm gonna take my last breath here on earth, and my first steps in heaven is gonna be leading to Jesus Christ and maybe the loved ones that have gone on. And the truth is every one of us will someday take that journey, and that shouldn't really create fear for us, it should really bring out the hope that we have in Jesus Christ because Jesus has already gone on before us and he's preparing a place for us. John 14, 1 and 3 says, Let you not your hearts be troubled. I go to prepare a place for you, and that's the promise that I hold on to. Now I miss my sister. There are moments I wish I could call her and text her. There's moments I wish I could share things with her. But when I think about her now, I don't picture an oxygen tank, I don't picture her in pain, I don't picture hospitals, I picture her finally whole in a healthy body, no disease, no trauma, no more suffering. And she's safe in the father's arms. And maybe the last line that really means the most to me in this whole song was your last breath here was your first step there. Because for every believer, death isn't losing, it's arriving. And the Bible tells us really clear to be absent from the body is to be present from the Lord. And when I thought about that, and when I talked to Jessica, and when she asked me what it would be like, and I said, I really don't know what it would be like, but I can tell you your last breath here is gonna be your first step there. Immediately, I think when Jessica passed, she's in the presence of God Almighty. So take a moment this week and spend time thanking God for the hope that we have in Christ, because those who belong to Him, goodbye is not forever. I hope you enjoy this song, Her Last Breath, written in memory of my sister. For all of us one day, our last breath here is gonna be a first step with Jesus. Enjoy the song.

SPEAKER_01 6:44

Words don't come easy. I don't know what to say. Watching goodbye fade away. Thought I knew this pain, thought I could sustain it, but I'm standing here now. I just can't explain. Straight into his eyes. Some of our days were closed, some filled my heart apart. But these last few years, God blended both our hearts. I'm holding to the promise. Goodbye's not forever.