Intuition vs Overthinking: How to Tell Which One Is Actually Leading

our intuition has probably been talking to you for years. The question is whether your mind has been loud enough to drown it out.

In this episode I take you through the business I built from panic rather than clarity, the signs I overrode, and what finally shifted when I started listening to my body instead of my mind. This is month one of Project Me, my twelve month reconnection experiment, and I'm beginning with intuition because everything else follows from it.

• The cafe plan, the rejection, and the redirection I could not see at the time
• How lack and desperation quietly hijacked something I genuinely cared about
• Recognising freeze as my stress response and what it does to clarity
• The difference between a decision that stretches you and one that panics you
• Why capacity has to be built before you can hold what you are asking for
• How breathwork became the practice that changed my reality
• Why you usually already know the answer before you go looking for it

If this one lands somewhere in your body, I go deeper on all of it in my newsletter, Magnetic Musings. You can follow along by signing up here.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

The Honesty Podcast is a space for women who know that they're meant for a life that's full of magic, excitement, and wonder. If you're ready to reconnect with your power and listen to that inner knowing that says you're meant for more, grab a tea, take a breath, and let's begin. Hi, and welcome back to the Honesty Podcast. In today's episode, I'm going to be talking about intuition because I am on a 12-month intuitive glow-up, and the reason for this is I know the benefits and the insane ways our lives can get better if we follow our intuition. And it's something that's often overlooked. The mind can be so powerful. So I wanted to discuss it today because I just know that so many of us are disconnected from our intuition. And if we knew how important it was, if we knew the benefits that it could have on our lives, we would definitely prioritize connecting with that part of ourselves. And it's actually so bizarre because spending 10-15 minutes in the morning doing some meditation, doing some breath work is the easiest thing in the world. Yet our minds convince us that it's harder than going to the same job every single day that we hate, than being in the relationship that brings us no joy, than being in friendships where the other person just doesn't love and support us. Like surely that's harder than literally sitting with ourselves for 10, 15, 20 minutes in the morning and connecting with that part of us that leads from a place of alignment. From if we do this thing, we are gonna get amazing results. Instead, we lead from our minds and we just completely push to the side, connecting with ourselves. So I just thought if I could share examples of moments where I have used my intuition versus moments where I definitely was letting my mind lead the way and just the difference it has made in my life, then hopefully it inspires you to do the same. I really fell back into being spiritual and reconnecting with that part of myself when I went through my Saturn return in Canada, which again I've spoken about on previous episodes, so I won't get into it too much. But during that year, I was forced literally to confront certain parts of my life that I had begun to neglect. And I'd been very spiritual from being a little girl, so it was only natural that I fell back into practicing meditation, looking at astrology, human design, working with the seasons and just getting way more in tune with nature. And in doing so, I realised that I am somebody who is meant to have a business. I want to work for myself, but I want to do that by doing something that actually causes a lot of good in the world. You know, I want to heal people, I want to lead by example and embodiment. So when I decided to move to Edinburgh with my partner after that year in Canada, that is what my mind began to fixate on. This need to have this business, and that's what I was gonna do. So originally it was a cafe. I was gonna open a cafe, this cafe was gonna have women's circles and it was gonna bring all the women together and it was gonna be incredible. So for the first year of being in Edinburgh, I worked and was also building this big business plan, and yeah, I was hell-bent on the fact that I was gonna own this cafe. At the same time as this, I was learning about human design. So my energy type in human design is a projector, and a projector is here for what they see, not what they do. So already the cafe idea was not aligning with my natural energy type, and something in me knew this, but my mind was obviously running the show, so I continued to look at properties. I was telling everybody I was gonna open this cafe, and I had put so much pressure on myself from telling other people what I was gonna do that I was really not listening to the signs, and fortunately at the very last minute, I did start to apply for some properties here in Edinburgh, and I got declined by this business owner. And at the time I was so upset and annoyed, but my soul wasn't, and that was the first time I was just like, had that been a yes, I think I would have gone for it, and that just wouldn't have been right. So, first time I just knew that actually my intuition was saying, let's not have this cafe, but it's not like I'd really learnt the lesson, I'd just listened to myself once. So then came, okay, well, if the cafe is not gonna be the thing, what is? And I'd met some incredible women here in Edinburgh, you know, very entrepreneurial, and again, so there was for me the pressure. They weren't putting pressure on me, people at work weren't putting pressure on me. The only person putting pressure on me was myself and the thought of what other people were gonna think. I was totally in this narrative of if I don't be this really successful business owner in the next 12 months, I'm a failure, everyone's gonna think I'm a failure, and the mind was definitely running the show. There's no way the universe, God source, whatever you want to call it, that works through us through our intuition, because that's what we're connecting to, like a higher power. Then they would never have sat down and been like, yeah, you're you're a fucking failure if you don't have this business up and running in the next 12 months. If anything, my intuition would have said, babe, it will take way longer than 12 months because you're not in a place where you can hold being a business owner. Your capacity to hold more money isn't there yet, to delegate isn't there yet. I'd only ever worked admin jobs, I'd never been a manager. So there was a lot of building my capacity and regulating my nervous system around these different elements. So my intuition would never have said that. And instead, I then fixated on this next thing. So then it became well, I've been telling everybody that I'm gonna fucking own this cafe, and now it's almost anticlimactic. I've been telling myself that I'm not gonna be in this job for much longer, so I need to do something. I hadn't saved any money. I mean, I I actually just feel so much compassion for myself. I'm not gonna judge that past version of me because if anything, I would just want to give her a big hug. I decided that I just wanted to do the women's circles. So then I quit my job anyway, started Laurel Leaf, which is what I was gonna call the cafe, and started doing women's circles, charging £55 for somebody to come to the circle, which I sit with. I think that was a good number because there was a lot of effort and time and money went into curating these beautiful circles, and holding space for people can be a lot. But £55 every two weeks, maybe like eight people invited to these circles, wasn't gonna pay my bills. It really sent me into such lack mentality around money because I was so desperate for people to book on to these circles, which I mean the whole intention was behind them was to bring women together, get them connecting with each other, and I asked such deep, incredible questions. I was gonna bring mother and daughters together. I'd practice with friends where I was getting them to answer questions with each other, and it was so beautiful, but that beauty was not a priority anymore because it was not even something I was thinking about, to be honest, because I was so desperate for money, because literally, money is like roof over my head, food on the plate. I also selfishly had done this without consulting my partner, who then was suddenly in a position where he needed to be paying more money, and that was really selfish of me because I'd not even asked if that was okay. He's working every single day, more or less, and already stressed, and I just added more pressure on because I was not following my intuition, I was letting my mind lead the way, and if anything, I was trying to prove to him as well that I could be this successful businesswoman and make him really proud. He never said any of this to me, by the way. He would support me to the ends of the earth, no matter what decision I made, he would be there for me a hundred percent. And bless the fact that he didn't even call me out on my behaviour because he just wanted me to thrive and do what I wanted to do says a lot. But I mean, like we've had a chat now, and I would ask him to call me out in future. But at the time, he was like, you do you boo, like I'll be here for you no matter what. But it didn't really help because I was acting from my not self, and then when the circles didn't do well, I then doubled down because I felt like such a failure at that point that I was like, Do you know what? Maybe it's women in business I need to work with, not just women, women in business, and I'm gonna set up this company that basically I'll help women with their businesses. I knew nothing about business clearly, because I'd not owned a business before. I hadn't, I don't know, even just had the job and then worked with other business owners. I hadn't shadowed anybody, I wasn't asking questions, I was just in this pure fight or flight. I need to have this business because that's what I I felt like in my Saturn return and working for other people just feels so horrendous. My attention was focused on what I didn't have. I was in such lack and scarcity, and the desperation was getting bigger because I needed money. So I ended up borrowing some money to then rent a space from my hairdresser. My hairdresser had a space in the back of their salon, and it was a thousand pounds a month. So I just thought, right, well, if I if I borrow some money and I pay a thousand pounds a month for the space at the back, that is gonna kick my ass into gay and I'm gonna be a really successful business owner. No, it just made me feel awful and it didn't kick my ass into gay because one of my stress responses, which I have begun to connect with and work on over the last couple of years, is that when I'm feeling really stressed, I will freeze, I will procrastinate. The ideas weren't coming in because I didn't have space for clarity and creation, I wasn't operating from that place. I was so disconnected with my inner world, and my mind was literally running the show, and it just kept getting worse and worse and worse. Every decision I made led to something worse because I wasn't making a decision that aligned with me, and my whole business was about alignment. I even think it was called something aligned. If you were here at the beginning, you'll know. The fact that I've blocked it out, like aligned for business, that's what I called it. So, and I just wasn't, I was not that person, and fake it till you make it is not a thing in this case. Do you know what I mean? It just wasn't because I wasn't regulated, I was just feeling sick every day, and then in the end, I ended up having to go and get a temporary job, and the job was worse than the job that I'd had before. The story goes on and on, and I just think that when we are in this state, we honestly believe that life is working against us, but I don't think it's that at all. Life is not working against us, the universe is here to help us and guide us, and where we put our attention, it will show us more of that. But I do think the whole purpose of us feeling really shitty and making decisions that lead to an even shittier place is because the universe is literally trying to say to us, you are not working from your true self. How many more signs do I need to put in front of your face before you start to take notice that this is not meant for you? The mind might be trying to convince you otherwise, but I'm gonna make sure that these situations you find yourself in are crap and it makes you feel awful because one day you'll say, I cannot go through this anymore, something needs to change. Actually, am I connected with my intuition or not? And that is where it's at. That is where we all need to get to. And some of us don't need it to be as bad as rock bottom. We can literally start to notice the signs that I now, after years and years of working on myself and connecting to that inner part of myself that knows from a soul level what I need to do. That as soon as I start making decisions and things aren't fully going my way, I'm like, whoa, whoa, whoa, let's take a step back, let's double down on that breathwork practice and meditations and just see what comes in. Let's journal more. Where is my not self coming up versus my true self? I can really see the signs because I will never go back to that place where I was desperate. It felt too awful. I ended up doing a horrible job temporarily until I put my foot down. I just thought, no, I cannot do it anymore. And that's when I started to get really intentional about even what job I was doing whilst I gave myself space to decide what was next. And I know that I'm meant to work for myself. Um I know that I'm meant to be here for healing, and I love working with people and seeing a change. That's why I did this podcast because it felt really aligned to put this out there into the world. And I've already had messages from people saying it's really helped them out, which even if it's one or two people, that is the whole point, isn't it? Like that's a human being, that's what we're here to do. So yeah, I feel like this was a really good decision. It felt stretchy, but it wasn't the same feeling I had when I was desperate. It was a scary, oh, this feels expansive, but it's testing me a little bit. That there's a difference, and I think it's really understanding the difference so that we know when to regulate ourselves to take action, and we know when to regulate ourselves to stop taking action that isn't aligned. And through doing a daily practice, doing my breath work, meditation, learning about my human design and astrology, and actually practicing it, because there's one thing to know it, there's another to actually experiment with it. Like I know that I'm here for what I see, not what I do. So owning the cafe was never gonna align with what my soul wants. I would have been actually burnt out and had no space for creativity and spending time with loved ones and spaciousness, which is such an important value for me now that I've had time to think about it and assess my life properly. So, yeah, really connecting with our intuition is so important. Why do I know that this works? I just didn't have the experience I needed when I was trying to launch a business before. And I think a lot of people really fall into this trap of it needs to be right now or not at all. No. If we want to be the best versions of ourselves, we need to learn and we need to be okay taking our time. It's not something, especially if you're owning a business, if you're getting into a relationship, like there's so many different areas that this actually resonates with that this falls into because you're not in it for six months or a year. Anything that really matters, friendships, relationships, career, children, moving somewhere, it's gonna be can you handle it for the next 10 years? Are you in it for the next 10 years plus? Does it mean so much to you that you will put one foot in front of the other and make sure that every decision is with intention and feels aligned? And if the answer is no, then maybe it's just not meant for you. And I think I really needed that lesson because I was a hundred percent just thinking about short-term wins. And the reality is that I need to be in it for a very long time, and learning human design and astrology took me the best part of two years to for it to start to click, and I'm at a point now where I'm like, Well, I love it, but I don't really want it in my business, and again, that was coming from my intuition because I slowed down and I started to listen, and even though my ego, my mind was like, But everybody knows you for this now, like you've been talking about this for a while, yeah. But it's just not where my soul wants me to go. I needed to learn it, I needed to implement it in my own life. I probably will use it at some point. But after getting calm and centered, I just knew it wasn't meant to be. And again, the ego and the mind can get in the way because then it's like, well, you've got to still do it because you've put so much money, time, effort, people know you for it. Well, no, because it's not aligned, so I'd just been miserable. So there's been a change of direction, and that's okay. Redirecting into breath work, so I started to discover breath work. I'd say about maybe a year ago, it was when the age of Aquarius came, about maybe a year and a half ago, and I just loved it because I sometimes struggle to meditate, like my mind can be really busy. But in doing the breath work first, and then I start to feel like I can really connect with the field. That's what it feels like. It's like I can feel the energy in my body, and therefore I can drop into this state of nothingness where the clarity comes in, the downloads, like it feels really juicy, it feels really nice. I can that's where my intuition for me is. It's this moment of silence, and then I can journal on it and see what's coming up. But the breath work really started to change my reality. So human design and astrology gave me the tools to assess maybe where I wasn't living in alignment, but then breath work really was the catalyst that started to change my actual reality because I was taking a step back and making decisions because it felt aligned, and then also I was changing these limiting beliefs that were going on in the background, keeping me where I was at. And my creativity has just doubled. My ability to sit here and do this podcast. I can't even tell you the difference between me a year ago, let alone the me four years ago when I was trying to do all this cafe stuff, like it's actually wild. But I am a different person because of it. And the moments where I have listened to my intuition, even working with people like I've been working with an incredible business coach called Jazz, being part of her faculty in the background. I would never have imagined somebody giving me that invitation two, three years ago. I was very much set on I need to do everything on my own and it needs to be this certain way. I would never have put in the plan that I would be running group calls for somebody else's business course. But of course that would align with who I am because I'm really good in them situations, and it also means that it's just coming into something that's already working while I'm building my capacity to hold a business, to work with a big group of people as well. Like the pressure of that, yeah, felt stretchy, but it's expanded me in a way that going and renting a room at the back of a hairdresser's to try and get women to work with me for an aligned business would never have done in a million years. So I think that letting go of the how as well, and just being like, okay, I'm gonna take this one day at a time. And right now, my intuition's saying, okay, I need a rest day, or my intuition's saying, Do you know what? You really need to go and learn that course, or maybe stop spending money for a little bit because it's no longer a nice to have, but it's become a bit of a habit. We know what our intuition's saying, just half the time the mind is so loud it wants us to convince us otherwise. So it really is just building that muscle, learning how to switch this off so we can connect here and trust it. And when we start to make decisions from from here, from our gut, from our soul, and then we see the results, it becomes a lot easier to then tune in to our intuition because we can actually see it changing our lives for the better. And I just want you to think about moments in your life where you've just had that gut knowing, that intuitive knowing that something is right or something's not right. I think it can be easier to follow it, you know, if especially as women, if we're walking down the street and then we just get that, oh, something's not right here, I need to be on my guard a little bit more, or in relationships where I've known the guy was cheating, bless my teenage self, but I knew I just didn't want to listen to that niggle because my mind was like, Well no, you're in this gorgeous relationship, that's really bad for you, but we'll just ignore that bit. And I actually was thinking as I was creating the notes for this podcast, I had done a breath work and then I sat and I thought, right, okay, what's gonna come up and what can I talk about? And doing Oracle cards and tarot came to the forefront because I think we already know the answer. There's been so many times that I have gone to book a tarot session, and I already knew the answer before I'd gone to that session, and I think that's what it shows us. It's like, okay, well, here are the cards and here's what it's saying, but you already knew that. You already knew you just needed somebody else to reaffirm, you needed an otherworldly thing to say, no, actually, you should be going in this direction. Actually, no, that guy's not good for you. Do you know what? Maybe put uh the brakes on that friendship because. It doesn't look good. And as soon as you hear it from somebody else, you're like, oh yeah, actually makes sense. Or your mind is really loud and you're not ready to hear it yet, even though your intuition's trying to tell you, the cards are trying to tell you, and you'll leave that session playing, oh, that person just didn't know what they were talking about, they're not very good. But then every time you go to get the tarot reading, it's there again. The oracle cards, it's there again. You know deep down what the answer is, you're just refusing to look at it because the mind is too powerful. And that's where I would say every single time, just take a second to walk in nature, to connect, to meditate, to do breathwork, to do EFT. There are so many amazing tools out there and free ones as well. Like YouTube has free classes on where it will help you start to quieten the mind and move into the body, and that is the first step. So to round it all off, I have been doing this 12-month intuitive glow-up, we'll call it, Project Me, and I've only just started it, so we're in cancer season, and I actually didn't mean to do this, but I was doing a Reiki course two weeks ago, and I really wanted to reconnect with my passions basically, and spirituality is a really big one. I love going to any sound baths, yoga classes, getting my child reading done, anything like that I find fun. So I thought, you know what? I'm gonna get this Reiki course done, and to make sure that I was working from alignment, I was gonna focus on one area per month because I had all these different ideas I want to do, like I want to learn how to DJ, but I'm also doing my breathwork course, also wanting to create this content. I work four days a week, so to make sure I stuck with this 12-month glow-up that I decided to do for myself, I knew that I needed to take it in stages in order to continue because otherwise it would have just felt too overwhelming. And again, my ego would have been running the show. I don't want that, I want it to be from my heart. I decided to do intuition for the first month, and then I looked and I was like, oh my god, it's cancer season, and cancer is my rising sign. So the moon rules my chart, and cancer and the moon are all about intuition. And I was doing an intuitive 12-month glow up. I mean, this is the moments for me where I'm like, what the fuck? Because it happens to you, you don't force astrology, it just works that way. And you look at the chart and you're like, Oh my god, fuck, yeah. So I just thought, you know what? Cancer season, I'll do it per astrological season, and I will do intuition as cancer season. And I've done this because I know that if the next 12 months are gonna have the results that I really want them to do, I need to be working from my intuition, and that is where we should all begin. We all need to start with what is going on within, because then our external worlds, the outward world, starts to mirror what's going on in here. And if we want the results that feel aligned and juicy and magical and abundant, and just give us that feeling of joy and gratitude and freedom, then it needs to start with us, and we need to start to build up them feelings from within so that we start to witness our realities mirroring that back to us. So I'm gonna end the podcast here. I would love to know in the comment section if you've got time when you have used your intuition and the results, and when you have not listened to your intuition and the results from that, and just also if you are going to take this advice, if you're going to start connecting with your intuition and what goals you've got for yourself, what intentions do you have for this next six 12 months? I would just love to hear from you as well. So, thank you as always for tuning in. I hope you have a beautiful week, and I will see you in the next episode.