Thought of taking a vacation with your ADHD kid makes your stomach clench a little. This episode is for you. Maybe, like me, you know travel is possible. Maybe you've done some road trips, you've done some flights, maybe you've even done the big bucket list destinations. But when you sit down to plan that next trip, your brain just stalls. Coordinating schedules, sensory needs, meds, meltdowns, sibling dynamics, it stops feeling like vacation and starts feeling like a high-stakes project you're already too tired to manage. So you do one of two things. Either you don't plan it at all, or you push your way through, go anyway, and come home saying that was not worth it, and I need a vacation from my vacation. Today on Raising ADHD, we're doing a raising ADHD reframe on travel. I'm very excited about this one. In this interview, I sit down with Mary Catherine Brooks from MK's Magical Adventures. She's a travel expert who specializes in families with autism, ADHD, and other complex needs. She doesn't just book trips, she designs vacations around how your actual family's brains and bodies work. So you're not just parenting in a different location for a week. You truly are getting a vacation you enjoy. And because I know your executive function is already caring a lot, I've put all of MK's best tips into a really cute, easy-to-use download for you. So you don't have to remember everything you hear today. If you want the download, just go to raisingadh.org slash 37 and you can grab it there. Let's dive into my interview with MK. Welcome to Raising ADHD, the podcast for parents and teachers raising ADHD kids. If you've ever felt frustrated, overwhelmed, or just unsure what to do next, you're not alone. I'm April Bradford, a former teacher and ADHD mom, and alongside my husband, Dr. Brian Bradford, a child and adolescent psychiatrist, we're here to give you the clarity, strategies, and support you've been looking for. Every week we break down the misconceptions, answer your biggest questions, and share real tools you can use right away at home and in the classroom. So if you're ready to feel more confident and less overwhelmed, you're in the right place. Hey
there, welcome back to Raising ADHD. I'm April, and today's episode is one that I'm super excited about. We have our guest expert, Mary Catherine Brooks, and she is a travel expert. So before we dive in, I have to say our family has actually traveled a lot. With my daughter, who has ADHD, we've traveled to 40, about 40 of 50 states, and most of that was like road tripping. So in the car for hours on end. And we've also traveled like out of the country. We went to Greece last March. So that long, like 11, 12 hour flight. We've done that. And I say all of this to tell you that travel with an ADHD kid is possible. And I also want to share though that this summer we were gonna go on vacation and we just didn't get it planned. Like planning is so stinking hard sometimes. And we have a dad, like my son is college age, and then my husband and my daughter were just trying to get it all planned. We literally haven't got it planned. So that is it's hard. And then you layer on ADHD, and okay, how's this gonna work? And what does that look like? It just makes it like paralyzing to get it planned. With all of that said, today's guest is exactly what our community needs. MK is the owner of MK's Metal Magical Adventures, which is a travel agency that specializes in helping families with complex and unique needs, including ADHD families. And so we're just going to dive in. Welcome to the show, MK. I'm so excited to have you.
SPEAKER_01Thank you so much for having me. I am super duper excited to be here.
AprylYay. Okay, so give us a snapshot of who you are and what you do and specifically how do you work with neurodiverse families?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, so um, so MK's Magical Adventures was founded in 2022. And we collectively, um I love helping people who have an extra logistic to figure out when it comes to vacation. So for a lot of people, that may be a child with ADHD or autism, or maybe it's even a partner with ADHD or autism. It doesn't necessarily just have to be kids. Um, it may be a food allergy or somebody being plus size and being worried about how that's going to impact their vacation. Or um, we are in a big military town. So a lot of people have PTSD or anxiety. So really I love working with people who have an extra logistic to figure out and just being really in thought. I love being really thoughtful and intentional about what we put in place before you ever leave for a vacation so that you can confidently take that vacation and actually enjoy yourself. Um, because there's it's one thing to go on a vacation, it's an entirely different thing to parent your child or just like exist in a different location for a week, right?
AprylYeah, that's so true. Such a good point. Yes, because like what's the purpose to go somewhere else and just like we're just surviving this and I can't wait until I get home. Yeah, very good.
SPEAKER_01And I I feel like that's pretty common for people. And I I hear parents of all types of children just say, like, yeah, when you're a parent, like it's not a vacation, it's just parenting in an alternate location. So I love making it an experience where parents, especially parents who really need that break more than most, feel like they actually get it when they go on a vacation.
AprylI love that because yeah, you're right. Our my community, they need the respite. And so the thought of a vacation is just more stress. So I love what you're doing and your mission behind it. Um, as you know, a
lot of people in our community have just completely given up on travel. They've either had a bad trip or they've looked at the logistics and they were like, this is not worth it. There's no way this is gonna work for my kid. Um, what do you say to that parent?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's a great question. So, one thing, I heard an analogy one time and it just like stuck in my brain for how you do vacations. So I think a lot of times people think of a vacation as this like one-time event that has to go perfectly. And if it doesn't, like we're never doing it again. And I don't, I think that's even more common in communities with additional needs or extra logistics to figure out. But I think that's common across the board. And I one thing that I would encourage people to consider is if Christmas goes horribly one year, does that just mean you scrap Christmas entirely the next year? Probably not. So why are you scrapping your vacation? I mean, like just because it goes bad, honestly, that can be a data point for what you can change in the future. So I think, and that that leads me to one of my questions. I love asking people, what has gone horribly wrong? Like, what was the worst part of your vacation previously? Because I think that tells us a lot about things we can adjust and change. But I would also say to families, like, we have to stop putting so much pressure on one vacation to be the perfect vacation that meets every single need. Because when you do that, it just is going to, you're setting yourself up to fail there. And so when you say, like, we may have some pain points, we may have some challenges, we're going to plan as much as we can, we're going to be very intentional, but things still may go sideways, and that's okay. You know, that doesn't mean we're scrapping vacations for all eternity. It's a data point of what we may need to adjust next time. And treat it more like you do Christmas or Easter or Halloween than you do, you know, this like big one and done thing that needs to go perfect or you're never doing it again.
AprylYeah, that's such a good point and a good analogy. Because yeah, you're right. You wouldn't be like, oh, my kid melted down on Christmas and they, you know, threw an entire fit because they were exhausted, because they didn't sleep, because they were so excited. We're never doing this again. Like, no, we wouldn't do that. That doesn't even make sense. So yeah, and I really like how you say this is a data point because that's I mean, when we're working with these kiddos, we know that we have to look at their behavior and take that data point and go, okay, this is this is what maybe triggered this, and we're gonna do this different in the in the future. But if we don't go on vacation, we'll never know and we'll never learn. Right.
SPEAKER_01And and so I was talking to my my mom is here for a few days, and so I was talking to her right before I got on the podcast, and she is act, she's actually been a pediatric nurse for like 30 some odd years. And so um, we were talking about it, and she's like, Some kids that may really struggle in a classroom, if you put them in these different environments, it may not be as much of a struggle. So it's it's also kind of hard to compare apples to oranges and say, like, yeah, this is absolutely gonna be a struggle if you don't really have anything similar to compare it to, if that makes sense.
AprylYeah, that's so true. Very good point because yeah, it's a totally different environment. And we don't, and if they haven't been there, we don't know how they're gonna react. Right. So I love that.
Okay, so when you sit down to plan a trip for a family with an ADHD kid, what is the actual process? Walk us through it from like the very first conversation to the finished itinerary.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, absolutely. So I think it's really important to highlight the fact that every single trip is gonna look a little bit different, which also means the process might look a little different. But one thing is every single client before we start working together, we have a call where I ask you a ton of questions. And I can't necessarily tell you exactly what those are going to be because it's so tailored to the family. And so I really am just I get super curious about what you want your vacation to look like. So I'm gonna ask you everything from, you know, do you do you have one of my first questions is always do we have any accessibility things or things like ADHD or autism that we need to think through? And how does that impact your family on a day-to-day basis? So maybe tell me about your last vacation if you've taken one, or tell me what your pain points are in a typical week. You know, what does your child struggle with? Um, I sometimes if I have families who are like, yeah, my kid loves to run away, that tells me early on what I am going to do in terms of like resort suggestions because I'm gonna add in extra safety precautions there so that we're we don't have a resort door opening into a parking lot. Um opening into an interior hallway. So that's kind of where I start early on, is a lot of questions. And then it's also gonna be like, what works well at home? Do we need frequent breaks? You know, do we when are we most energetic? When do we just like when can we not handle anything anymore? And then how do we combat that at home? So then that information is used to pull together quotes to make that itinerary. Um, and that's all gonna depend, you know, on whether that's a Disney trip or a cruise or maybe a family all-inclusive. But then for itineraries, I'll go down to hour by hour or even half hour by half hour sometime to tell families like, hey, if you're at Disney and your child struggles in lines, here's what you're gonna go ahead and be booking as your next lightning lane so that we're not having to wait in lines all day. Or here's where we're gonna go so that we can get a quiet moment. You know, if you know your child's gonna need a break, here's where we're gonna build that break in so you can have that to look forward to. But also itineraries are flexible. Like nothing that we're planning for the most part is so do or die that like it can't be changed. And I think that's something to remember when we're working with any type of extra need is that there's flexibility within that. And so a big part of itinerary building for clients with additional logistics, like families who have a child with ADHD or a partner with ADHD, is really building in that extra flexibility that can support the family in real time instead of just being a hypothetical.
AprylYeah. Oh my gosh, I love this. I love that you said that you will plan it and just say, because this is exactly why like this summer didn't happen, because I have so much brain overload right as it is, that to think about planning a day at Disney, I'm like, that sounds terrible. But so if someone just tells me, like, at this time you're gonna do this and you're gonna go to this lightning lane, I mean, that sounds delightful. And doing it in a way, because then, yeah, like I mean, for um my daughter with ADHD, she's she's the hyperactive type. So, like standing in line, unless we have that planned well, I mean, she's bugging, she's jumping, she's hanging on the ropes, you know what I'm saying? So that's awesome. I think too, another thing that you said is looking at what works in their day-to-day life right now. I think a misconception, and you can correct me if I'm wrong, but I uh I've seen this in our family at least. It's like we've spent all the money to get on this vacation and we are gonna hit the ground running and make the most of this money, right? So for the parents that have that mentality, what would you say to that?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, so that's uh that's something I'm and so uh a mutual arm mutual connection, Abby, that's one thing she points out that I talk about a lot. I think the one and done or like make the most out of a vacation, like the way people do that, puts this unlike insane amount of pressure on a vacation to be this thing, and nobody ends up happy. Like nobody at all ends up happy, the parents aren't happy, the kids aren't happy. Honestly, like I think parents do it with the best of intentions because they want to maximize their money, but they also want to make all these amazing memories with their kids, and then they get home, and what the kid actually remembers is that mom was screaming at me in the line because I was just over it. And like kids are doing the best they can, parents are doing the best they can, but every it's everyone's first time being a person, and so like with that, like it there's gotta be grace. So I think, especially for a place like Disney, remembering that like you don't you're there's no way you're gonna do it all in one trip. So, like, just remove that pressure from the get-go and figure out what's gonna work best for your family right now. And even if you say, Okay, we aren't gonna go back every year, but like we may go back in five years or we may go back in 10 years, that just removes a lot of pressure that's there when you say it's a one and done or like once-in-a-lifetime trip. I think the other thing too is people often, when they do the once-in-a-lifetime or one and done mentality, end up spending a whole lot more than they would if they just said, we're gonna go on a vacation every year and here's what we're gonna budget for that. And so when people start to do that, you know, when you set a budget and it's like an every year thing, it just it just again removes all this pressure. And not only does it remove pressure from the parents, kids can feel that pressure too. Um, kids are highly attuned to what their parents are feeling. And so if they can tell you're stressed, it's going to bleed into other things. So I think what I would say is remove the pressure and just like be okay with not doing everything. It's not the end of the world. Like, do do what matters to you and your kids most right now because that's also gonna shift. Like right now, it may matter to them a lot to be able to meet Mickey Mouse. Maybe at the next time you go in 10 years, that's not as big of a deal, but they want to do all the thrill rides. So I think just being present where you are and being intentional with the season you're in and planning for that instead of trying to plan this trip that meets every single need. Just like we we all have different friends that meet different needs, vacations meet different needs. And that's one question I love to ask early on, too, is like when you get home, what do you want, what words or phrases or sentences do you want to tell your friends and family about this trip? Was it magical? Was it relaxing? Was it super fun and exciting? Because those are all going to be different vacations that are planned very differently than if we just come at it from we want to take a vacation and we want it to be all things to all four or five of us in a family.
AprylYeah. Oh my gosh, that's so good. Because we have definitely been the ones that are like, okay, let's pack in everything. And then we come home and instead of like, oh, that was so great, it's like you're so exhausted. You need a vacation from your vacation. Yes, exactly. Yeah. So I really like this of being very intentional of what the purpose is and the lifestyle stages and understanding what does your child want right now versus what do you I think sometimes we have like, oh, we want to go on all the rides because these are so fun. And but our kid just wants to meet Mickey Mouse, they could care less.
SPEAKER_01Right. Right. And and the thing is, they're not looking at the app, like they're not gonna know half the time, unless they are at an age where they have their own phone and they are doing research, they're not gonna know that you didn't go on three rides. They're gonna remember that my I mean, I have a client that let their kid get a dole whip at 7 a.m. And that child still talks about that because that's what that was what was cool about it to them was that mom let them eat ice cream before they ever ate breakfast. Now, I'm not recommending that for everyone. It may not work for your family, but like that may be what your child comes home and remembers is that there was like you know, a differ like a different thing that they weren't typically allowed to do that was novel for them. And so that becomes a really big deal. And some of the other stuff that you think, like, oh my gosh, we didn't get to doesn't is not even on their radar, it's just on yours.
AprylYep, it's so true. Yeah, and the novelty, like the little things that kids remember versus what we think that they want, it's right. Like, yeah, our agenda versus theirs always is different.
SPEAKER_01It's all planned with the best intentions. Like, I don't I will ever think, and I've been to Disney so many times and see parents yelling at their kids, and like ultimately it's because they want to give the kid their chat children the best experience. It's yeah, it's not out of a place of like anything other than love, but they become so overwhelmed and overstimulated, and the kids are overwhelmed and overstimulated, and everybody needs grace, and then it's just too much.
AprylYeah, it's so true. And we know that when the mom, you know the phrase, if mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy. Right, right. Yes, mom's stress, the whole family's stress. So yeah, okay, this is really good. So when you're looking at, and you've already kind of mentioned this, um with you know, it's gonna be different for every family, but what does like a well structured, and I'm not even gonna say day, but kind of like if you were to look at a vacation,
and I'm saying this from we went to we did this totally way too much. We had six days in Florida, we did Disney for three days, and we did um Universal for three days, and that was a lot. I'm like, we should have just taken like a pool day or something. So when you like, when you're planning a schedule, what does a like a well-structured week for an ADHD family? Not even just a day, but like a week for like timing and pacing and breaks, when you're building an itinerary, what does that look like?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, so I think one thing I try to always start with is keeping the margin in mind. You know, what you just mentioned is so many people's experience. And it's it is ADHD families, but I see it with almost every family I work with that when they come to me, they are like, we're going to Florida and we want to cream in everything Florida has to offer. So we want to do Disney, we want to do Universal, we want to do SeaWorld, like they want to do all of it. We want to go to a beach. And I'm like, hold up. Like I often tell people split Disney into unit universal into two entirely separate vacations and and i think i think one thing to really start with is what's the margin you know how long does it typically take your taught child at home to transition from thing to thing if that's if that's you know 30 minutes great if that's three hours we kind of need to think about some of that before you get going because every time you go to a park leave a park go to an a different an entirely different park with an entirely different format like Disney and Universal are not the same I don't care what anybody says it's like one of my hottest takes they just they're not and so I think I think it always starts with like with building the margin so I like to have margin in the vacation but also within every day and that doesn't necessarily look like a three hour pool break or like going back to your resort every day though that can be really helpful for some families sometimes that looks like okay we know that there's a Hollywood studios for example there's an Indiana Jones show at 11 and then there's a frozen show at noon and then we can get lunch at a character meal at one and then there's a Beauty and the beast show at 230 or 3. Or lower STEM activities that get you kind of in the air condition or just give you a minute to kind of reset midday can be really helpful. Going back to your resort and doing the pool starting late one morning because you have lightning lanes planned and then doing a pool day I there is not a single Disney trip I don't recommend somebody do a pool day. Just because Disney pools in resorts like it's not just the pool. There's so much there and I think so often when you get to the resorts if you haven't planned that in that's one of the things your kid's going to hyperfixate on is like mom when are we going to do the pool? When are we going to do this? And then you're sitting there going well I hadn't really planned that so then when do we do that and it becomes this extra level of stress on you that you then just keep having to put off and it it just can add like another pain point before the vacation is even started. So I love margin in every day but also a whole day of margin within the vacation that may not have a super solid planner structure. I think within that as well when we have parked days having those kind of down to the hour sometimes down to the half hour because of the lightning lanes can be really helpful. But for different vacations let's say a family wants to do a cruise or an all-inclusive cruises are really nice for parents because you can take your kids to the kids club and so that gives you parental margin as well. I love that for parents um and kids often really look forward to the kids club so it's like a win-win because your vacation includes childcare but cruises are also really nice for neurodivergent families because the structure is so built in for you get on the boat you go to a port you have a port arrival time a port departure time your meal time is already set the same every day there's often a theme there are activities you can look at that can be where you can really give your child some voice and choice as well because you can say like hey here are the three activities we have to choose from during this timeframe. Which one sounds the most fun to you and you don't necessarily have to sign up for a ton of things before you certainly can but there's a lot of opportunity to let your child explore an interest or you know enjoy the kids club while mom gets to enjoy the pool. Like there's just a lot of flexibility there and I love that for families as well.
AprylYeah oh my gosh that's so good. I didn't even think of like cruises being like friendly for neurodiverse families. But you're so right like I we know our kids like to have choice they don't like to be told what to do but being able to have that structure because that's totally their brains thrive on structure and so it's like yeah here's your structure but here's your choice but you only get these choices and it takes the thought process off of me right as mom.
SPEAKER_01You know like it's like we end there choices. You know they're not 37 choices it is there are three. And so you are narrowing it down right then and there. And often I one thing I love about cruises too is you know I know you're a former teacher and so there's
this education component too where you can you know I often will go in with a list of questions for our um server at dinner what is it like in your home country so there's also that component where your children can they still give you printed daily planners if you want them you can ask for that. So that may be something that you give your child and you say you get to choose what we do from noon to two every single day. Can you please circle on today's paper what you want to do so that we can go do that. So it you know it gives it gives families an opportunity especially once children are reading age for the kids to look at those things too and be able to make some choices yeah oh my gosh I could just see my daughter with her highlighter like this is what we're doing today.
AprylOkay oh this is so good um okay so you've talked about you know Disney and um cruises what types of destinations resorts or trip formats do you tend to recommend for the ADHD families and why do they work better than others?
SPEAKER_01I recommend Disney for a lot of families um that's really what the agency got it started with. But I think cruises are also great for the reasons I I kind of jumped the gun on that question. I think all inclusives can be great too because in some ways it's kind of a land-based cruise. So I think all inclusives can be really great but I I think ultimately there can be a lot of flexibility and destination as long as the planning is done intentionally. You know if it like I don't necessarily for any rec vacation recommend that people are going 247. You're not going to feel like that's a vacation when you came home. I think that um Disney has a fantastic resort in Hawaii as well. So if you know if like a Hawaiian vacation is something you're looking for I've been to Disney's Hawaii resort it's fantastic as well. But I do think cruises and um theme parks offer a lot. I think those can be vacations where kids can really get the chance to get their wiggles out and families can build really fun memories together. But I think you know there are also family all inclusives that can work really well as well.
AprylGive us some concrete examples walk us through what you actually plan for an ADHD family and what that itinerary looked like. What did you build in and how did it go?
SPEAKER_01Yeah so um I grew up with ADHD so a lot of my trips include these components just because they're really helpful for me. But a lot of what these trips look like when I'm planning for someone with ADHD is having a concrete structure that that may include half an hour or full hour time blocks of things that we're going to be doing. I think for Disney vacations specifically one thing you hear is a really big pain point is like the the waiting in lines. And so a lot of what I'm working on when I'm working with a family who has an ADHD child is what can we do to minimize that line wait time. So that looks like things that looks like you know staying at an on-property resort so you get early entry which means that you get a whole half hour at the beginning of the day where lines just aren't a thing because there's so many fewer people in the park. That also may look like planning to stay at a deluxe resort for two reasons for ADHD families. If you've got a child that likes to run away deluxes are you know eloping in in ADHD autism terms. Deluxe resorts are the only ones that have interior doors that open into a hallway. Moderate and value resorts open straight into parking lots. It could also open into an area where there's only one gate between a child and a pool. So that's a safety feature but the deluxe resorts also get extended evening hours on some nights. So you know if you have a child that has kind of a wonky sleep schedule or maybe they're a late riser but they can hang late at night that can be really helpful. That's also really helpful in the summertime which we're coming up on because it's so hot that once the sun goes down, that's one less stimulus issue that we're working with as well. So I think that's some things that I do but it also may look like taking a day to do a VIP tour where you know the child has a tour guide that they can ask all of their Disney questions and maybe you've been writing those down all week long. Yeah and the child can ask those but that VIP tour guide will get you to the front of every single line you want to go to so those those things like that can be really helpful and they're not a lot of times people view those as luxuries. Sometimes they're survival skills like I you know there we fly first class sometimes because I'm plus size and sometimes that's out of comfort it's not necessarily out of like trying to be super luxurious. So I think with that like I'm giving you permission right now to say like even if somebody else may see it as a frivolous thing if that's what's going to be best for your family we can make that choice and yes I would encourage you to do so because you're ultimately like it's not about anybody else it's about your family and what you all need.
AprylJust giving permission that this is not being frivolous we did have when we went did our Florida trip we had one VIP day at Disney and and we had so we had our family and then we had friends and they had little kids and it was so nice to just be able to like go through the park quickly not wait in lines like I was like I don't know if we can never do Disney the same it definitely changes how you do things but I think there are there are different ways to kind of get the same experience.
SPEAKER_01And so I think that's where also like relying on support and people who this I mean this is literally what I love to do for my living. So like I love helping people figure this out and so often people just don't know what they don't know. They don't know that there are options and possibilities
that may make it easy or let's say your child has a super like random hyperfixation and I you know let's say their hyperfixation is elephants and you're going to Disney and I tell you like hey we actually have a tour that you guys can do that gives them a chance to really you know experience that in a new way that's something that a parent would love the opportunity to give to their child but sometimes you don't have time to do all the research to know all the options that are possible. So I think that's also where leaning on support that is like eager and excited to show you what's possible can also be really key to vacation success.
AprylYes, I agree. And I feel like some of our vacations I mean talking about like I say this in quotes wasted time but it would have been we would have had a better vacation had we had someone who like like you who knew more about it you know than just like chat GPTing like what should we do? Like no like the human who really knows makes a huge difference.
SPEAKER_01Well and I I hear people talk about AI and vacations all the time and just like this is completely out like off topic but AI is often two to three years behind in the vacation space. I'm using it right now but a lot of times it'll tell you to go do something that like doesn't exist. Now let's say you've shared that with a child who is ADHD and that's what they've hyperfixated on and then suddenly that thing is not an option.
AprylYeah.
SPEAKER_01Again you're setting yourself up for failure and a meltdown because what they're wanting is something that you thought was there but it actually isn't. Yeah just just another um thing to consider when using AI for something as important as a vacation investment.
AprylYeah so good okay so um what are specific accommodations services or access programs at Disney on cruises or resorts that ADHD families should know to ask for so I think I think the hard part with that is as much as I see ADHD as a neurodiverse thing some other places have a harder time coming around to that.
SPEAKER_01Yes and so with that there are certainly things we can advocate for and at the same time not all programs or supports are going to you know be recognized for that the the DAS pass at Disney is is one that I like to mention with this because they are so specific about what they will and won't allow and that has changed significantly over the past few years. And two families could say the exact same thing but one person gets accepted and one doesn't so there are certainly things like the DAS pass that you can request. But I just to clarify the DAS pass is like a disability yeah das pass das stands for disability access services pass. But you have to go through an interview and depending on who you get as your interviewer like I've done it for me for a variety of reasons um and they can either accept or deny you. So it's hard to plan an entire vacation predicated on a support or service or access program that you can only apply for 20 days before vacation and then what if what if you don't get it? So I think that's really where it comes down to personalized and customized support for your family. And when you especially if you work with a travel advisor being super upfront about what those needs you may have are. For example, hey my child does not do well with loud noises. Okay. That means that at certain time like I'm not gonna suggest certain hotels for you if that's the case because you'll hear fireworks every night. Oh yeah. Whereas like others may be fine with that. So I think that's where like being really transparent if you're working with a travel advisor about what does and doesn't work for your family can be helpful. But I think a lot of that comes down to the specific destination. And that's where we make calls and ask for what's available. Beaches Turks and Caicos, Beach is Negril they do really great they do a really great job. Disney does a pretty good job with some things. Cruise lines do a really great job with a lot of things. So that really comes down to having a conversation and saying like what does support look like for your family and then asking for that need specifically instead of just a generalized access program or you know accommodation if that makes sense.
AprylYeah. Oh this is so good. I think too like you're saying and just hearing you know this conversation is I mean that's the dash pass you can't guarantee that. But no matter where you're going having someone like you in your back pocket of like you get it.
SPEAKER_01I mean so many people don't understand and you're like no I get it like I live this way one of our core values is advocacy for this reason because like whether you have an extra need or not something can go sideways and and having someone in your corner your back pocket however you want to put it when that happens so that you can be present on your vacation and just handle whatever's in the moment and just shoot a quick text off and I take care of the rest like that makes things a lot easier. So you know that's that's one one thing that I think is really important there. Yeah I feel like just working with you is an accommodation it's like incredible I try to make it one because I I I really have a heart for people who need to figure something out extra um whether that's a food allergy or their child has ADHD or autism or their partner has ADHD or autism like it you know it just adds this extra layer and this extra stress and this a mental load. I know women talk all the time about the mental load it's just an extra mental load that we often don't necessarily consider until we've decided to scrap the vacation entirely or until we feel like it's too late and we're two days from vacation and we're screaming at everyone and everything is overwhelming.
AprylYeah you're packing the bag going why are we doing this? Right.
SPEAKER_01You're like this was the worst choice I've made in the past 18 months and I really can't tell you why I made it but here we are. Exactly yes okay so um when a day starts going off the rails on vacation um what's a simple reset plan that you coach families to use in that moment so I love this question because I think I think sometimes when things start going off the rails it's so easy to just throw in the towel and be like everything is ruined. And I've done that I think we all have in in different ways you know whether that's the day is ruined the vacation is ruined the holiday is ruined whatever is ruined um I think some really simple things for vacation can be like finding a quiet space which may seem like it's going to be impossible at Disney World but it's actually not um there you know going back to the question about services they have their list of quiet spaces but I also have my mental Rolodex of quiet spaces that aren't necessarily on their list. And so I think I think it can often start with finding a place to downregulate whether that's you know like on a cruise going back to your stateroom or finding a a quiet corner of a boat deck or um you know something uh on an at an all-inclusive going back to your hotel room like maybe just making five or ten minutes to downregulate do some deep breathing um you know if you're really hot like go in a bathroom splash some cold water on your face just doing some activities getting your wiggles out if you're like full flight you know fight or flight and like losing it. Yeah. Humming singing
a song there are so many like little activities that we can do in the moment that can help us kind of go back to baseline so we feel a little more safe and a little more settled and then figure out just what your next right thing is. We can always put next right thing steps into place in a vacation plan. That might just be like looking at the itinerary you have and going like okay we're not gonna focus on the whole rest of the day right now we are walking to Tiana's Bayou adventure and we're gonna go ride this water ride and it's gonna be really fun. Or that might look like going you know what like we don't have the bandwidth or the capacity for that right now we actually just need to sit here for another 20 minutes and talk about what we need or talk about our big feelings. But I think also remembering that like it's your first time being a parent too it's not you know like give yourself some grace as well and remember that like in order to meet your child's needs you have to meet your own. Are you hydrated have you like do you maybe need to take the day a little slower? Is there something else you need? Are you hungry? Do you need a snack? Because I think so often it's so easy to focus on everyone else and then you're fussing at your child and it's like wait I actually could really use a granola bar right now. So simple things to like keeping snacks in your backpack keeping water and electrolytes handy um not being afraid if you forgot those things to like buy the water bottle in the gift shop it's really okay. It's not the end of the world you know doing things like that that can really just help you kind of get a quick reset. And it doesn't have to be some 10 step reset plan. It can be we're gonna you know put one of those squeegee towels over our head and sit here for five minutes and sing a song Or, you know, get our wiggles out or whatever.
AprylYeah. Perfect. Okay. So if there's one thing a listener takes away from today's episode, what would you want it to be?
SPEAKER_01I think that vacation is possible for you with intentionality and the right support. Um as I've learned more about neurodivergent communities, I think it's just so easy to have a belief that like things just aren't like just kind of resign yourself that like you're not gonna take the vacations. It's not gonna look like other people, you don't have options. But I think I would want people to hear and know that they have voice, they have choice. There are opportunities, and there are people like me out here who are so excited to support you and help you make vacation what you ultimately what you ultimately want it to be, not what you're seeing on somebody else's Instagram, because those are two very different things.
AprylYes. Oh my goodness, MK, this has been so incredible. Just, I mean, you've opened my mind to so many things. I did not realize how, you know, I think of a travel agent, I'm like, oh, they're just gonna plan, you know, this is what we do on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday. But like you really get into the day-to-day and really, I mean, just like I said at the beginning, when you were saying the fast passes, I'm like, that didn't even, or the lightning lights, like that didn't even occur to me. Like, you understand this community, and I'm I mean, this has been so incredibly helpful. And we needed to hear this, that there's someone who can help us plan vacation and make us make this easy for us. So tell us if um, you know, the for the parents who want to connect with you, work with you, uh, where can they find you?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, absolutely. So I am MK's underscore magical underscore adventures on Instagram. Um, my website is mk's magicaladventures.com, and you can actually book a call with me right from the website. That's gonna be about a 30, 45 minute um consultation where we talk through what your vacation goals are. I always tell people too um earlier is better than later, just because that gives us so much more lead time to kind of think through what different things we need to plan for. Um, but it also gives us much better options. So, you know, MK's magical adventures pretty much everywhere. You can Google me and that's how you can find me. Wonderful.
AprylOh my gosh, this has been so good, literally so like mind-blowing for me. So I appreciate that. And I'll make sure all of MK's links will be in the show notes. And um, thank you so much for being with us today, MK. And um, we will chat with you later.
SPEAKER_01Yes, thank you so much for having me. I am so honored to be able to speak to your community.
AprylOkay, I told you it was gonna be really good. MK is awesome, and her tips are so good and doable. So let's land this one with a simple raising ADHD reframe you can carry into your next trip and planning your next trip. Travel isn't hard because I'm bad at planning. It's hard because ADHD brains are juggling extra logistics and sensory needs all at once. When I designed the trip for our brains, instead of against them, I'm not lowering the bar. I'm finally making vacation actually a vacation. Your tiny doable step this week is not to book a vacation tomorrow. It's just to shift how you think about it. So instead of we could never handle that, ask what would this look like if it were built for our family and our needs. And instead of I have to plan everything perfectly, ask, are there two or three things that actually matter most for our family to enjoy this? And remember, you don't have to hold all of MK's strategies in your head. I've put together a free download with all of her top tips. You can grab it at raisingadh.org slash 37. If this conversation gave you even one little ooh that makes sense moment or helped you feel 1% less scared of traveling with your ADHD kiddo, would you share this episode with a friend who's in the same boat? It helps other ADHD families find these reframes and feel less alone. Thanks for listening to Raising ADHD. You don't need a picture perfect vacation. You need a trip that works for the family you actually have. And you're allowed to build exactly that. I'll see you next time.
Brian BradfordThanks so much for joining us for today's conversation on raising ADHD. Remember, raising ADHD kids doesn't have to feel overwhelming. Small shifts can make a big difference. If you found this episode helpful, it would mean the world if you would hit subscribe, if you'd leave a review, or if you shared it with another parent or teacher who needs this support. And don't forget to join us next week for more real talk, practical tips, and encouragement. Until then, you've got this, and we've got your back.