18. Why Does God Make Me Wait? What He’s Actually Doing

Why is God making me wait? Here’s the hidden work He may be doing while nothing seems to change.

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If you have been asking, “Why is God making me wait?” this episode is for you. Waiting can feel confusing, painful, and deeply personal — especially when you have been praying, trusting, and showing up, but nothing around you seems to be changing. In this Pretty Deep episode, Petrina Verma shares how God may be doing hidden work in you during a waiting season, even when you cannot yet see the answer.

We talk about the lie that says, “If nothing is changing, nothing is happening,” and how Scripture shows us a different story. Through biblical examples like Joseph and David, this episode explores spiritual formation, trusting God’s timing, surrendering control, and learning how to meet God in the waiting instead of striving your way out of it.

In this video, you’ll learn:

• Why waiting on God does not mean He is absent
• What hidden work God may be doing in your heart
• How spiritual formation happens in unseen seasons
• Why delay is not always denial
• Five prayer and journaling questions to bring to God while you wait
   
   This episode is part of 'The God You Didn't Know' — a season of honest conversations about the misunderstandings about God that quietly shape our confidence, identity, and peace. 

Watch the full series here  ➡️  

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLuIjdmA2_b_OmBO6i6_R8hEsJrkRSXsGz

⏰ Timestamps
 0:00 — You've been praying. You've been waiting. And you're tired of asking God, when?
0:30 — What God may be doing in you while nothing around you seems to move.
3:19 — The lie hiding underneath every waiting season — and why it's so convincing.
4:17 — What really happened when COVID hit and my business started slowing down.
9:25 — The one word that changes everything about how you see your waiting season.
14:06 — What to actually do while you wait — a simple five-question framework.
19:37 — A prayer for the woman who is tired, stuck, and wondering if God sees her.

My mission here at Pretty Deep is to help women move from striving, overwhelm, and uncertainty to clarity, peace, and purpose, through a deeper relationship with God.

Disclaimer: This video is not sponsored and contains no affiliate links. The content shared on the Pretty Deep YouTube channel is for encouragement, reflection, and faith-based conversation.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

You've been praying, you've been waiting, and you've tried to be patient. But if you're honest, you're tired. And the question is still there. God, when? And underneath that question, there may be another one. One that you're almost afraid to ask out loud. God, are you actually doing anything here? Because here's the thing about waiting: it doesn't just test your patience, it tests what you believe about God. Today we're going to talk about the hidden work that God may be doing in you while nothing seems to be changing around you. Why delay doesn't always mean that nothing is happening? And how to meet God in the waiting instead of striving your way out of it. Because here is what I want you to hear right now, before we go any further. Waiting does not mean that God is absent. And a season that looks still on the outside does not mean that God is still. If you're in a waiting season, this episode is for you. Here's what we're going to cover today. We look at the lie that waiting tells us. The one that says that if nothing is changing, that means nothing is happening. We'll talk about what formation actually means and what God may be building in you right now. We'll look at what scripture shows us about hidden seasons. And I'll give you a simple framework. Five questions that you can bring to God while you wait. By the end of this episode, I want you to feel something shift. Not because your circumstances have changed, but because your perspective has. Let me ask you something. What are you waiting for? Maybe it's direction, maybe it's healing for yourself or someone you love. Maybe it's a relationship that needs to change. Maybe it's a child who's walked away from God and you've been praying for years. Maybe it's a career door. Maybe it's financial breakthrough. Maybe it's clarity about calling, what you're meant to do, what comes next. Whether what you feel in your heart is real, or whether you imagine the whole thing. Waiting is hard in a very specific way. It's not just inconvenient or frustrating. It tests something much deeper. Waiting doesn't just test our patience, it tests what we believe about God. Is God hearing me? Did I miss something? Am I being delayed because I got something wrong? Why does everyone else seem to be moving forward while I seem to just stand still? Why is God opening doors for other people? And the door that I'm standing in front of, it won't budge. Those questions are real. And if they are in you, you're not failing for having them. You're not faithless. You are human. Here's the lie that lies underneath most waiting seasons. It's subtle, which is what makes it so powerful. The lie is this if nothing is changing, that means nothing is happening. When we can't see movement, we assume that there is no movement. No open door looks like no progress. No answer means no activity. And no clarity means no direction. No visible fruit means no purpose. And from that place, it's very easy to start believing that the waiting is actually a verdict or that the delay is proof of something. That God is either absent or worse, that he's present, but he's not moving on your behalf. That is the lie. And I want to dismantle it today. Because the waiting season may look still on the outside, but that does not mean that God is still. I want to tell you something personal because I have lived this. A number of years ago, when I was running my photography business, you know, portrait photography, I was creating work that I was very proud of. Work that was changing the lives of the women in front of my camera. And I had taken on a studio lease. I was excited, I was ready, I was committed. And then COVID hit. Now it was a 36-month lease, but because of all the various lockdowns, I could only really use the studio for about 18 out of those 36 months. It was an incredibly difficult season, not just for me, but for so many other photographers at that time. I tried everything. I kept showing up, I kept working, but clients were not signing up. Things weren't moving. And slowly the confidence that I had taken years to build started to take a real beating. And here's the thing about that season that I want you to understand. It wasn't just that business suffered, it went deeper than that. It targeted my identity. I started to question whether I was actually good enough, not just at business, but at anything. Whether what I had to offer was worth anything at all. You see, I had no formal qualification in photography. I was completely self-taught. And in a season where nothing was working, that quiet voice, you know, the one that had always been there, it got very loud. Your work isn't good enough. Your prices aren't worth it. Who do you think you are? My inner language in that season was very hard on myself. And somewhere in the middle of all that, a desire started forming in me to create something, something that mattered, something that could help people. I think part of me wanted to feel like I had something worth giving because I had stopped believing that I actually did. I mapped out so many directions in my head and on paper. A fashion channel, a photography channel, a style platform. Around and around and around, trying to find the angle that felt right to me. But no matter which direction I came at it from, the same voice was waiting for me on the other side. You're not qualified for this. You're not a teacher. You're not an expert. No one wants to hear from you. Sit down. One of the things I thought of was talking about faith. But when I really thought about it, I thought to myself, I can't even seriously consider this. Because who was I to talk about God? I felt like I knew so little. Like I was the last person who should open her mouth on that subject. So I didn't. For a year, I didn't do anything. Not because I was so busy that I didn't have time to, because I didn't believe that I was enough to actually begin. And then eventually I wrote the first episodes. And then I sat on them for months before I recorded a single one. The night I finally released them, I went to my husband and said, What have I done? Now everyone is going to look at me. That entire season, the business, the studio, the waiting, the silence, the fear, the doubt, it felt like nothing was happening. It felt like I was just falling and falling and falling and being left behind. But here is what I know now. Looking back on what I could not see then, God was not absent in that season. He was working. Not in my circumstances, but in me. He showed me that I had not failed. He reminded me of everything that I had tried, how hard I had worked, how creative I had been, the women I had served, the lives I had touched. And slowly, gently, without a single word of condemnation, God began to shift my identity out of what I had achieved and anchor it in who he said I was. He told me I was his beloved daughter. He told me that he loved me, that he thought I was worthy, that he thought I had something valuable to share, that I didn't need to be silent, that I was qualified, not because of any certificate or track record, but because he said so. God took the waiting and wooed me into a deeper relationship with him. He drew me into his word in a new and deeper way. He reshaped what I believed about purpose and calling. And he built something in me that the assignment that he was giving me would actually need. And those of you who've been on this journey with me for a while will recognize some of this because so much of what God was forming in me in that waiting season became the foundation of everything that I now get to share here. So the waiting was not empty, it was formation. Let me give you a word for what God may be doing in your waiting season. The word is formation. Formation is the work that God does in you before, during, and sometimes long before you can actually see what He wants to do through you. Formation is becoming more like Jesus in the hidden places, in your thoughts, your desires, your motives, your trust, your surrender. And here is the tension. We want the assignment. We want the open door. We want the answer. We want the clarity. We want to know what's next. But God is often far more concerned with the woman that he is forming than the timeline that we are demanding of him. Now that is not a comfortable thing to hear. I know that. I've felt it too. But here's how I want you to hold it. God is not punishing you with the weight. He might be healing something you didn't even know needed healing. He might be refining something that needed refining in you. Forming you for the weight of the responsibility that you might not be ready yet to carry. And that God, who loves you so much, will not hand to you before you are ready. What we want on one side and what God may be forming on the other side. We want the answer. God wants trust. We want the open door. God may be forming readiness. We want the assignment. God may be forming character. We want the clarity. God may be forming discernment. We want the breakthrough. But God may be forming dependence. We want the next season. But God might be forming surrender. None of that is punishment. All of it is love. Scripture shows us this pattern over and over again. Think about Joseph. Joseph had a dream, a real dream from God, a genuine glimpse of what was coming. And then betrayal happened. From his brothers no less. Slavery, false accusation, prison, years of waiting. From the outside, it looked like nothing was happening. It looked like God had forgotten Joseph. It looked like the dream was dead. But Joseph was not forgotten in that prison. He was being formed in the hiddenness for a responsibility that was not yet visible to him. The wisdom, the endurance, the character, the humility, it was all being built in those hidden years. Before God lifted and elevated Joseph, God secretly formed him in the quiet places. And then there's David. David was anointed king by the prophet Samuel. Now this anointing was real. God chose David. But the throne, that was not immediate. There was a huge gap between the anointing and the actual fulfillment. And it was long and hard, and there were seasons of running for his life. And yet, David, in those hidden years, became a man after God's own heart. Not despite the waiting, through the waiting. I love David for this reason. David was imperfect. He wailed and wept and complained to God. He asked the hard questions, and he brought all of himself, the anger, the grief, the confusion, and he laid it at God's feet. And then he worshipped. I understand that. I am that. And I suspect so are you. Imperfect, unworthy in and of myself, yet deeply, deeply loved by my Father. Philippians 1 6 says, He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion. God began it, God is carrying it, and God will complete it. The waiting is not the end of the story, it's part of the story. Romans 8 28 says that God is working all things together for the good of those who love him. And the verse that follows tells us what that good looks like. That good looks like being formed into the likeness of Christ. That is the hidden work. That is what God is doing. So what do we do while we wait? Waiting doesn't mean doing nothing, it means doing the next faithful thing without demanding the whole map first. I want to give you something practical to take into this week. I'm going to call it the hidden work check-in. It's a simple framework, a posture, and five questions that you can bring to God in prayer and in your journal whenever you meet Him. Before I give you the questions, here's the posture. Start with praise. Now I know that might sound counterintuitive. You're tired of waiting. The answer hasn't come. Nothing is moving. Praise can feel like the last thing on earth that you want to do. But here's what I know about praise. Praise is not a feeling. Praise is a declaration. It's a choice you make, even in the absence of the feeling. It's you saying, God, I trust you. I trust that you're on this. I trust that you have it safe in your hands. I trust that you're working it out for my good. Even when I cannot see it. Even when I cannot feel it. Even now. When you praise God in a waiting season, you're not pretending that everything is fine, but you are declaring what you know to be true above what you can currently see. And something happens when you do that. The atmosphere shifts. Not because your situation has changed, but because you have. Your eyes move from the weight to the one who's holding you in that weight. So before you ask God a single question, worship him first. A song, a declaration, even a whispered thank you. Whatever that looks like for you today. Position your heart to hear from God and then bring him your questions. Question one. God, what are you forming in me while I wait? Not why is this taking so long? Not when will this end? But what are you doing in me right here? This is the central question, the one that shifts everything. Because it moves us from demanding an answer to seeking God's person. Question 2. And this one I want you to pray rather than just ask. Open your hands and bring God these words from Psalm 139. Search me, God, and know my heart. Test me and know my anxious thoughts. See, Lord, if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. That is not a passive question. That's an act of surrender. You are handing God the pen and saying, Go ahead. Show me what I can't see in myself. Show me what this season is exposing in me, Lord. The fear, the control, the self-reliance, the need for certainty before I can trust you. Because here's the grace in that. What gets exposed, only that can get healed. Question 3. God, what desire are you changing in me? This is one that I have felt very personally. Sometimes in a waiting season, what used to feel urgent starts to feel less important. What used to drive me starts to shift. New hungers form. A deeper pull toward God's word, a quieter sense of what matters actually, a loosening of things that I was gripping very tightly. When you experience that, pay attention to it. It may be that God is quietly redirecting you from the inside out, long before he redirects anything on the outside. Question 4. Lord, what obedience is available to me today? This one keeps us from becoming passive in the waiting, because waiting is not the same as doing nothing. Waiting is faithfulness in the small things while you trust God with the big things. What is the next faithful step? Even if it's small, even if no one sees it, even if it feels completely unconnected to what you're waiting for, do that. And question five. Lord, where am I striving for clarity instead of walking with you in trust? I'll be honest, this one is the most personal for me. Because striving for clarity is exactly what I default to. I want more information, I want to do more analysis, I want to try and figure it all out on my own. When what God is simply asking is, walk with me, trust me, stay close. I will show you what you need when you need it. If you want to take this further, spend some time in your journal this week. Write this at the top. Lord, I feel like I'm waiting for dash dash dash dash. But while I wait, what are you forming in me, God? And then write down one fear that God may be exposing, one desire that He may be changing, one small act of obedience for this week, and one truth about God that you can declare while you're waiting. Now, I've made you a beautiful printable just for this. It's called the hidden work check-in with the praise posture, the five questions, and some space to write if you want it. It's free and the link is in the description. Pop your email in and I'll send it straight to you. I want to speak something over you right now. You're not stuck. You are not forgotten. You're not behind. And the waiting is not proof that God is absent. There may be hidden work happening in you right now. And one day you'll thank God for it. The season that feels like nothing may be the season that changes everything. Not because of what happens around you, but because of what God is doing in you. So if you've been asking, God, why are you making me wait? Maybe today the answer is not a full timeline. Maybe it's an invitation to come closer. Maybe God is saying, let me form you here. Trust me, I know what I'm preparing you for. Can I please pray for you? Father, for the woman listening to this right now, the one who's tired of waiting, the one who has been faithful, praying, trusting, showing up, and not yet seeing what she's waiting for. Would you meet her, Lord, please, right here? Lord, let her feel in this moment that you see her, that you hear every prayer that she has ever prayed, that not one of them has gone unnoticed. Give her peace in the uncertainty. Give her trust in your timing. Give her eyes, Lord, to see what you are forming in her even now. Give her the courage to stop striving, Lord, for clarity and simply to walk with you one step at a time in trust. And Lord, would you please do the hidden work in her? Go deep, Lord. Form what needs forming, heal what needs healing, strengthen, Lord, what needs strengthening in her. And let her know, Lord, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that she is not alone in this season, that she is loved, that she is held exactly where you need her to be. Lord, we ask this in the name of your son Jesus. Amen. If this episode spoke to you, I would love for you to share it. Think about the women in your life right now who are in a waiting season, women who are feeling stuck, who are wondering why God hasn't shown them what's next. Send it to them. You never know what one conversation shared at the right moment can do for someone's week or her whole season. If you want to go deeper, I'll link the episode on five signs that God is preparing you for something. Some of you who have been on this journey with me for a while will recognize it. It connects beautifully with everything that we talked about today. If you're not subscribed yet, please do. Every week on Pretty Deep, we come to exactly these places, the honest searching real ones, and we find out what God actually says. I would love to keep having these conversations with you. So much love. See you next week.