WHO'S OUR CELEBRITY HALL PASSES?

🎙️ This week on The FarmHer Files: WHO'S OUR CELEBRITY HALL PASS? 👀⭐

It all starts with a simple question... who's your celebrity hall pass? But, as always, the conversation quickly spirals.

Maria swaps farmyard chaos for city chaos as she tells the story of her unforgettable trip to see Zach Bryan in London. What should have been a straightforward concert turned into a night featuring a 1am walk through Tottenham, Uber drama, questionable decisions, and a reminder that London definitely doesn't operate on country logic.

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Transcript

New Intro And A Singalong

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome back to the farmhouse file. Is that a new catch catchphrase tune?

SPEAKER_01 0:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 0:09

A new intro?

unknown 0:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 0:12

Do you know what? I'm gonna try and jazzy that up and put that as our intro for this this episode. Welcome back to the farmhouse file. Da da da da da da da da da. Hello, welcome to Maria's Music Magic. Fucking run, and I hope you're not listening to this on headphones. I can sing! I could sing. Run faster. Yeah. What she first instructed, please. Yeah, no one wants to be a song. What we sing. Um you are my sunshine. Okay. One, two, three. You are my sunshine. My only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. Oh if it was blue.

unknown 0:58

Fuck it.

SPEAKER_00 0:58

The skies are grey, you twat. Yeah, it makes more sense. You'll never know, dear. How much I love you. So please don't take my sunshine away. Please don't take my sunshine away. Ladies and gentlemen, Abby and Maria are in the building. We should sang

Hall Passes And Celebrity Crushes

SPEAKER_00 1:25

some Zacky B. Oh, what we get Zacky B in the house. Can we talk about his guitarist? Oh the last great American cowboy! Who's your whole pass? Whole pass? What does that mean? Your one pass. Like, if you're allowed to shag anyone. Anyone, and Matthew could not say nothing. Probably him with a hat on. What Matthew? Yeah. Um no, you could shag any celebrity and you you no no strings attached, no nothing. You just no guilt. Can we have no guilt in there too? Yeah, yeah, no, no. It's like you're one what is the definition of a whole pass? Hold on, hold on. Hold on. What is what is the death definition of a whole pass? I thought it went out and a pass so you can go for a purse whenever you wanted during your class. Hypothetical permission to have a romantic affair fling one night stand with someone, usually a celebrity. Um are you ready for this one? Have you ever seen Clint Eastwood's son? No, I'm gonna go Scott Eastwood. Who's Scott? Scott Eastwood. Getting excited. Really? Show me. Kind of what he looked like I just wanted to look at him. Forty years old. I'll take that any day. Really? It's not really that much older, is it? How old are you any age? How old are you again? I think Matthew might give me a hall pass as well if like they're a millionaire. And about to die. How old's Matthew? Twenty-nine. That's quite an age gap. Only five years, isn't it? Four years. How old are you? Twenty-four. Five. How old were you when you got together? My eighteenth birthday. I was I was off the age. Can you say that nowadays? I don't think you can. Can he's hold on. Very drunk, but I approached him. Oh.

unknown 4:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 4:09

I might have to beat that out. I think you might. Abby has been calling my husband an ounce with an N on the front. I didn't know that that well pedo? Is that better? No, can we s Matthew is not a pedo or a nonce. The only people he's ever shown interest in, like stub wise, are like 10, 15, 30 years older than me. That's his cover-up story. Yeah.

unknown 4:39

For fuck's sake.

SPEAKER_00 4:41

This is going so far for you. How old were you and Scott when you got together? I was 21, he was 22. Oh, you've got a really close gap. Yeah, he's only a year older than me. Oh really? How old did you think he was? I thought he was a few years older as well. What are you saying? He looks looks bad for his age? I think 27. Maybe he doesn't maybe he just uses head and shoulders over his whole body kind of thing. No more than you can. You'd be correct. You would be so correct. I love that. Three in one, thank you. Face wash, body wash. No, he has two in one hair and then he links. Okay. So okay, maybe he uses two products. No moisturizer. Does Matthew moisturize? No.

unknown 5:29

No.

SPEAKER_00 5:31

This has gone so far off drag. Would would it be any other way? What would your hall pass be? Tucker Wetmore. Singer. Yeah. But like. He just had a concert, didn't he? Yeah. Smash. Um I know exactly who you're on about, but I really just want to look at him. Same? Like, Tucker Wetmore with a hat. Yes. Topless in bed. Like, what? Give me a bit of this. Just let you know. Oh he's stunning. If you want a picture of him, you can watch the video version of this on YouTube. Um. Yeah, Smash. If anyone's got a chance to make it a little bit more. I'd just like to let you know. Oh guys, you would really want a picture of this. No, like a one-time thing. Not like. He's probably not husband material. No. Okay, maybe he is husband material. Actually, he's husband material. I take that back. Sorry, Scott. Smash. Anyway, shall we? I have never ever liked a guy with a mustache. What is wrong with me? Oh, I love a bit of facial hair. It's got to be. If I'm to fancy anyone other than Matthew, it's got to be tidy facial hair. Matthew used to have very tidy facial hair. And what about now? Well he does now, but you when you're married, you see every part of someone, don't you? Like no two, otherwise I've got to be. I should say every era of someone. So like if he's not well shaven, you see it. Whereas usually, like, if you're dating or something, they'll shave up ready to go. Or like if they're in public and single, they'll shave up. Their beard, their mustache. This is a really bad tangent we've gone on because it sounds like I'm being dirty and I'm not. Either way, tuck away at one with a hat. Smash. For sake. Smash! Scott Eastwood also wears cowboy hats. Have you seen a photo of him and one? No, but I like baseball hats, fine. Yeah, go for that. Smash. Backwards or front? Backwards. Oh, backwards. Yeah. Smash. Smash. Smash, smash, smash. No, no, I look like a pervert. Um I've got so much editing to do. So he's a pervert. We've come to that. Cooling, cooling my husband. How about how old even is Tucker Wetmore? I don't even know how old my future husband is. 26! Smash. Smash. Everything. Smash. Smash. Tucker, if you want to come on the pod. Wait, what? Wait, what? Now that is cruel. That is cruel. So I'm obviously Google Tucker Wetmore. Tucker Wetmore tickets 2026 to 2027 tour and concert dates. Click on it. Sort out. There are no upcoming concerts in the United Kingdom. Why put that then? Why? He's literally just had one though, hasn't he? I know, but your girl was a too unstable to attend. What about Morgan Warland? Is there any coming up for that? Nope. He's not as much of a smash. He's your like soul writer though, isn't he? Yeah, I like his songs. Yeah, Zachy B's my soul writer. Do you know who I did debate going through trauma for to go and watch again? He's got a concert in November. Noah Khan. Oh yes.

unknown 9:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:20

I'm going to look Coombs, is it next month? Coombs. Um where's that to? Oh, that's Wh which arena's that? Is that Tottenham as well? I don't know. Wembley. I think so. Georgina's the one with the tickets. I'm just attending coming along. Um Malcolm Highland tickets? No. No. 2027 is a is a poor year. Poor year. What a day. What a time to be alive.

London Part Two Setup

SPEAKER_00 9:57

Anyway, we've come on to this situation because um We're meant to be doing a part two. Yeah, of um what Maria got up to in London. Maria took on the big city. Woohoo! It was scared comics. Yes! Go Maria! Good

Zach Bryan Night Begins

SPEAKER_00 10:15

job. Don't trust Uber. Um right, so I went to Zachy B. Frickin' love his music. But anyone not translating that is Zach Bryan. Yeah. And I loved it. Compliment is Samantha Bryan, as in like Zachy B's wife. Yes. She messaged me back. What? Yeah. What? She was like, thanks so much, lovely. God bless you. For what? I just complimented, I just said you look really pretty. Wow. I know. I was it was similar. Woohoo! What is wrong with me today? I'm rolling with it though, it's quite entertaining. I've had one can of Coke and I'm ready. Caffeine. Caffeine. I'm just the unfiltered version of you. Yeah, basically. Maria, I'd like to say, Maria says all of this probably stuff behind cameras. Maybe not the three stuff. I only balance it out a bit on here because I know a lot of children watch my stuff like alongside their parents. I hope children don't watch me. Oh, they do. Maybe the podcast. I've got to add some humour in. Yeah. Well, this is why we joined up together, because you get to do the unfiltered and untiltered. Unhinged would be the better word. At the start I got a lot of messages from people like saying I'd really like to show this to my daughter, but it it my stuff used to have swearing in. Um so then I was like, you know what? If that's a request and they've asked so kindly, let's go for it. But at the end of the day, nobody watches me to watch the PG version of something. Exactly. I have cute sheep and that's about all.

SPEAKER_01 12:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:02

Yeah. That's as far as it goes. I swear a lot. You can tell I don't go out much because I swear like a trooper. I probably would swear less if I actually went out more. Yeah, probably. Um yeah, so anyway, went to Zacy Byron. Me and Matthew went. Going to Zackey B was okay. Train it was good. Ubered, safer. Just don't have to worry about where we're going or anything. But did you get the train to London? Yeah, we got the train. Yeah. And then we Can I be cheeky? How much does a train to cost in uh London now cost? £133 each. Oh, that wasn't too bad. With return. No, sorry. £166 for both of us, both ways. It worked out we worked it out literally the night before is when we booked it. And we worked out it was cheaper to get the train than what it was to get to drive up. Yeah. And that was just with fuel. Um so yeah, went to that. Um we literally rushed over to Matthew's parents to drop the children off and see it! Stressing so much, and Matthew was like, We're not making the train. And Matthew's dad was like, get in the car, all go, put the kids back in, I'll take your car back so you don't have to worry about parking or anything. Thank God he did. Um there were times where like the speed limit was definitely a recommendation, and we got there that finally that the train took off as our bums touched the seat. It was not a moment. Well done, congratulations. Thank you. So luckily we didn't have to pay for a new ticket. Well done. I'm presuming that's what would happen if you missed your train, you pay for a new one. Like that's your fault. Um, and then we unless you got an open ticket, which I don't think you would have for that price. No, well, it was an open return, yeah. But a set leave. Yeah, so that's what we did. Um and then um

Tottenham Exit And Uber Chaos

SPEAKER_00 14:00

on the way back from the concert, none of the Ubers could come through to Tottenham Stadium. Yeah. And there's as far as we were aware, there was no train stations nearby either. Was there? So not that I'm aware of, unless someone found one and I don't think you need to let me know. I don't think I'm going there again. It was quite a trauma place. Um, she won't be getting an Uber either. It was quite a rough place around the stadium. Tottenham. Yeah, it was quite rough. Um so on our way out of the stadium, me and Matthew walked maybe like three miles. Um, and I was literally pooping my pants. I was holding Matthew's hand like every time I saw something I didn't like, my hand would get tighter, and he'd be like, It's okay, I'm not scared, you don't have to be scared. I was like, That doesn't reassure me. Scared of what? I just felt you were gonna be robbed, stabbed robbed, stabbed, shot. Um, there was someone who shot their car door. You can take the girl out of corn more, but not the corn more out of the girl. Ah, help me. Someone shut their car door at one second, and I went, and Maffey was like, Is that actually our schedule? I was like, I am so on edge right now. Oh, bless you. And then we sat by a bench because the Uber couldn't, like, you need to wait somewhere for an Uber, don't you? And we had lost everyone with cowboy hats. And I was like, Maffie, this is really fucking scary. I don't like this. People we were walking like past had like manbags. Yeah, they just looked like they wanted to cause a problem. If I had to pick someone who looked like they wanted to cause a problem. They looked like they were in gangs. At like one o'clock in the morning, yeah. Juggies. That yeah, that sort of scat, yeah. Um, it wasn't making me feel very comfortable. Um so we sat down on a bench. The Uber said it would be three minutes. I was like, that's fine. Like, that's fine, we can do this, we can do this. Three minutes went past, not a single Uber had like said they'll come and pick us up. We then learnt that Uber has a bidding system. Yes. Which I didn't I didn't realise, it's like a country bumpkin, like fucks Uber. Um and the longer they wait to for a driver to accept your lift, the higher that the Uber puts the price up. Yeah. Um and he waited quite a while and he got like 50% rather than however much. Probably like 10. Yeah. Ubers apparently don't get paid that well. No. Well they do if they scam you. Whoops! I can't believe that. I don't know how it happens though. Surely it's secure. I don't know. And that's why I don't go into London. Yeah, I don't know. Um Yeah, so it was good, good really, really enjoyed the concert. There was someone in front very, very, very drunk. I don't mind a drunk person, but give me a breather of five, please. Quite full on. Very, very full on to the point where he probably kissed Matthew three times. And his girlfriend was apologising more than once. Well, at least he wouldn't kissing you. I I didn't even give him a chance to talk to me, I'm not gonna lie. I'm not like that with anyone. I will happily bite my tongue with a lot of people. And like most of the time, people don't really annoy me. But when he said, Right, Matthew, what do you do then? Matthew went, I'm a farmer. Um, and then he went, and what do you do, Maria? And I was like, I'm a farmer, and he went, Who run the farms? Boys, who run the farm, boys. And I thought, firstly, wrong lyrics, and then I I let it go for a minute, and then he was like she was just bubbling inside. Yeah, I was. I was strewing because I thought, oh, go away. Um then he made two more comments about how I couldn't farm and how I don't know what I'm doing, and I thought, I'm gonna fucking say something, but I left it, and then he went, Oh, do we review guys have like Facebook or social media? And I was like, What do you mean? He was like, like where you

Drunk Crowd And Farm Sexism

SPEAKER_00 17:50

show your farm. And Matthew was like, I don't, mate. Um, and then he went, She does though. And I handed mine over and he was like, Oh, you actually can farm. And I was like, Yes, yes, I can. Like every shit, show woman in agriculture, I can farm. Surprise, surprise. It really, really annoyed me. Aw. But I I don't mind if someone makes like a jokey comment, but it was very much like a comment. Probably a bit pissed. Well, you said he was very he had to go for a tactical chanda twice during the show. I think that's I think we've all been there. And the fact we know that says a lot about how bad he was. We were three rows behind. Oh, yeah. I haven't done a tactical chander during a long time. It was quite a scene. It was like everyone was really close to begin with, and as the show went on, everyone kept like parting away from them. So it was like this big gap. But like they just smelled, and then Yeah, like there was this big gap, and I felt so bad for the girlfriend because she was lovely. She was pissed, but she was like not normal person. Yeah. Yeah, normal person. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she was really nice. I liked her, she was really good. What was your favourite song? I really like Burn Burn Burn. Of course, everyone's gonna say revival, and I do agree because it's 20 minutes of pure carnage, like it's so good. And the fact the fireworks are at the end, everyone gets their solo that they otherwise wouldn't get, and it's just a whole vibe. Like, yeah, revival on its own is good, but that was like excellent. Sun to me, I love if you have to pick one to rewatch.

unknown 19:27

Frick.

SPEAKER_00 19:28

You could only play one song. If I had to pick one, it'll be a revival. I'll get 20 minutes of it. True. True. Yeah, so I'll go for that one. What were the prices on drinks up there? £8.50 a pint of cider. Matthew was paying £8 lager.

unknown 19:43

Shit. I know.

SPEAKER_00 19:45

The lady was like Inflation? Yeah, the lady on my bank thing, she was like saying all the statements. I was like, can you please not ring out read out those? I don't want to be reminded. Yeah. That's actually hurts the heart and the bank account a little bit. Yeah, please, thanks. Don't want to be reminded. Actually, that one was a scam as well. And a scam literally. Or everything from London. I think they took my bank card and took me to London. Well, they check your IP address on your phone. Oh. See if it actually was you or someone else. Quite cool, isn't it? So you couldn't fit your IP address. Bad times. Didn't. Anything else happened interesting? You stayed up there, didn't you? Yes. So we stayed up in London for the night. Um we got back to the hotel at maybe 12 o'clock, 1 o'clock, 1 half one-ish. Mum and dad night. Ow! Woo! Um and this is where we ordered our Uber Eats and we thought, oh, let's have like a nice Chinese. Like we haven't eaten tea yet. That's like Chinese? Yeah. Chinese were pit. Well, you know, we're probably pissed, pissed. We weren't. No, we didn't. We only had like maybe three pints each. It was we were very much sober. Yeah. Um yeah, got back, ordered it. It said 10-minute wait, and we thought, perfect, we can like have a shower, get changed again, go get

Best Songs And London Prices

SPEAKER_00 20:57

it. Two hours later, it arrived. I have never had prawn crackers that were wet. The noodles were that cold, they were literally like you pick them up and there was water in the bottom. They had condensated that much. The chicken wings literally tasted like looked like slop. And I've I am a farmer, I am a tight Cornish farmer. Not finishing food is like a big thing. It's something that like doesn't happen. Um you just appreciate where it comes from, don't you? You appreciate the work that's put into it. Yeah, did not like I think I had like maybe three bites and I was like, nah, I can't do it. It's actually revolting. Oh. They got a one-star review. Maybe that's where my scams are coming from. Yeah. They're charging you about four times. Yeah, you put a bad review, we're gonna put it through four times. Yeah. That's the one. Well, it turns out someone's actually using my card in um Is it not Papa John's? Uh the Burger Place. Burger King? No.

Hotel Food Fail And Card Scare

SPEAKER_00 22:01

Um McDonald's? This is a bad guessing game. I can't even remember what it's called. Five Guys. I think it's Five Guys. Oh, right, yeah. Did you go to Five Guys? Have you been to Five Guys? I was like, I've never been to Five Guys. I love Five Guys. I've never experienced it. Expensive. Is it? Yeah. But do you like I kind of think maybe I did experience it at my friend Bex's birthday, but I don't know if it was Five Guys. So sorry. We to up the story. So sorry, I didn't mean to yawn through that. You know when a yawn just catches you and you're like, fuck, did I just yawn at the middle of someone's conversation? And I'm gonna have to yawn a goat, you know. Need a little nab. I did that very half-hearted yawn. I had to stop myself quite quickly. Oh, so five guys. That was naughty of them. Yeah. They have it's like they've printed out your card and taken it. Someone's very hungry. Yeah, literally. Yeah. I wants to just go around all like getting Ubers to eat each of the fast food places.

Museum Surprises And Ostrich Dangers

SPEAKER_00 23:06

We then went to the Natural History Museum the next day. It was as you expect. I didn't realise how big an ostrich was. I also didn't realise how small puff of fish could come. Now, is it an ostrich? I've learned new facts today. Not today, this week. Is it an ostrich or an emu? I think it's an ostrich. Pretty sure it's an ostrich. On the dangerous animal list, and you've got to have a license. They are really dangerous creatures. And I can't remember whether it's an eight foot or a ten-foot fence, and you've got to have a gap underneath for you to be able to roll out under. Yeah, they can be really aggressive. Yeah. Do you know how fast they can run? Faster than me. Yeah, definitely. Well they've got long legs, haven't they? They have. I think it's either 30 or 40 miles per hour, either way, very impressive. That's quick. That is quick, isn't it? That is quick. They've got a big kick on them as well. Bloody hell. Yeah, no. Yeah, we were talking about it and I didn't realise the fencing restrictions that they had. It makes sense though, doesn't it? Because they can be really, really aggressive. Yeah, but if they're running quickly, you're not gonna have time to get up get down and roll. We're probably already gonna be attacked by that point, so you're already on the ground, so just roll a bit further slowly. As you're getting your feet pecked off. Yeah, no thanks. Like the badger of the bottom. But you're probably like scratching. Yeah, probably.

unknown 24:34

Yeah, no.

SPEAKER_00 24:35

Should we do some market research a minute? What are you looking into getting ostriches? It's not gonna load on my phone, is it? I'm just gonna put ostrich attack. Oh, do do I want to know what an ostrich attack looks like? I don't think I do. Oh, I've not even spelt ostrich right. Outridge, I've put. Ostrich attack. Oh, I still want to spell ostrich right. Uh dangerous um uses immense weight, um weight and powerful legs to kick. Can have a fatal strike with a 10 centimetre long dagger-like claw to survive an attack. Expert survives getting low, lying flat on the ground, and covering your head and face. To survive. Yeah. I knew they were aggressive, but I don't think it can um s sprint at speeds up to 43 miles an hour. Meaning you cannot outrun them. No shame. When I was thinking 40 miles per hour, I thought, no, that sounds way too fast. Yeah. I doubted myself. Um Is that a board lester on your necklace? It's just a normal sheep. It looks really cute. Thanks. Like it. Scott got it for me. Woo, go Scott. He actually uh did great gift giving this week uh this week. This birthday. So did we discuss the gift gifting on the podcast for Christmas? I think we did. No, no, no, he got a painting drawn of Lulu. Oh, I love that. Um copycat. I know. I knew you were gonna say that. Um above my fireplace, there's a picture of Cooper that's been drawn. Yeah. She had drawn that with pencils, and then she had painted like the same lady had painted Lulu. Oh, that's so cute. Um so yeah, got a painted version of that, so that needs to go up somewhere. And then um I've left your presents at home. I'm I'm talking we're talking about presents and I've only just realised. I'll bring them next time. It's fine. Sorry, continue. Um And then he got me this as well. That's really cute. Yeah. Do you have a picture of the painting? I don't know whether I saved a picture of the painting. I knew I sent it to a few people. But uh sheep does it very borderless-y. Oh, wait, I don't think it's got the ears. No, that's the only bit I'm looking at. No, because it's got outwards ears. Oh, is it? Yeah, it's got outwards ears rather than I was admiring it fully. Rather than uppy ears. Uppy uppies. Up ups. Up ups. Um no, I'm sorry. I don't have a picture of the painting on my. Can you insert it down here for people watching? Yes, I can insert it somewhere here for everyone, but I can't show you Maria because that's fine. I can re-watch it. Yeah. So Oh, that was really cute. Good job, Scott. You've done better than me right now. Go, Scott! Actually remembering to give the presents. Yeah. They were in my car last week as well. Maria! Sorry. Bad woman, bad, bad woman. Poor you. Yeah. It's fine. I'll forgive you. I know. I'll let you off this once. Thanks, appreciate that. Well, at least we got here and actually filmed for once. Yeah, literally, it makes a big change, doesn't

Summer Upload Disruptions And Sponsors

SPEAKER_00 27:55

it? We're not that bad, are we? Um Should we talk to the listeners about potential summer disruptions? Yeah, I think we should. I feel we underestimated how busy summers were for us both. Yeah. We would like to think that we could get one out of a week, but we're realising that maybe it's not gonna be possible. Also, if Maria decides she wants to come on week, which is obviously bloody lovely of her, I understand she is travelling, and we notice that there is major disruptions on the draw carriageway, please check the traffic before you leave. Yeah, like today I was in traffic for an hour. Yeah. So if we notice that there's like a bit of major crash or what have you, obviously we're gonna pull it, we're not gonna bother filming. It's not it's not nice for Maria, it's not nice in general, especially if the heat's high. Yeah, if there are episodes missed, there are episodes missed. At the end of the day, you have got a free service, no one is paying. Other than our sponsors, which we have actually pulled for a little while because we have been and didn't say. Um, Maria obviously has a lot of day showing going on, which although she tells me we'll be absolutely fine, I fear that they might get on top of her. And you're like, no, it'll be fine. And I'm like, I know what it's like. Sometimes the day shows are worse than the week shows. Yeah. Because at least you can break it up, like you can drop them off the day before, then do the show. Whereas you've got to drop them off, wash them all before, drop them off, do the show, leave that day. Actually, the day shows are probably a lot worse. Maria's now looking at me like, what the fuck have I signed up for? I don't even know how to friggin' clip my sheep at the minute. Um I still don't have a uh trailer to haul my sheep, which is great. That's a whole nother thing. How did you get your sheep to Devon County? That's a topic that I can't talk

Buying A Livestock Box Debate

SPEAKER_00 30:12

about on the podcast. So I'm just gonna beep out. No no no no no no legal, everything was legal, but the stuff before was quite carnage. So I'm gonna beep it out for everyone. Sorry, goodbye. We're back. So I'm gonna have to buy a livestock box, which actually is proving quite difficult considering I can't go and view livestock boxes.

SPEAKER_01 30:36

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 30:36

Because everything nice is not within close capacity. Haven't you worked with Graham Edwards before? Maybe they might like chuck you over a deal. Oh, oh, sneaky. Um, I don't know. I don't know what I'm gonna do yet, because also I'm like, if I'm paying for something, do I need it to work for cattle for Scott as well, just to make it worthwhile? Because at the end of the day, I don't use a trailer that much. But when you need it, you need it. Exactly. So at the minute we're taking You could get like a small P4, whatever it is. Yeah, that's all cool until you're taking eight sheep to Devon County and their horns are out like however far. But Devon County's not that far from you, is it? I'm not doing three loads. I'm not. You got a silver spoon. No, um I don't know whether I'm gonna get a double decker.

unknown 31:24

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 31:25

Because then I can have rams on top, use on bottom, or other way round. Um, just for separation purposes. Some people say a double is easier to tow. Some say otherwise, because you've got more airflow problems. Which do you prefer? A single deck or a double deck? Double deck. Yeah. So I actually saw one in North Devon that I wanted to. Well, double decks can go to single decks. Yeah, no, no, that's well, no, what I mean is like the height. Oh, you're wondering if you have a small box or a big box. Yeah, yeah, like literal. I think a big box probably be financially more viable because then Scott can use it. So I actually found the secondhand one, which you know what, I was close to give a message and you going, can you just go up and if you're close by on the way, just go and have a little look. But um, I'm gonna see if Scott's free with his bum buddy. Yeah, I don't want it that to come up back as a fallback on me if I look at it and then like a year later it's to shit. No, it's fine. It's actually a great medical one anyway. So is it a winner? But I really like that it's um you wind up the middle decks. Yeah. Um just makes life easier. Life easier, yeah. I never actually found a sheet box that I liked. So what are you doing? Um my dad has kindly let me use his, so I'm just gonna disinfect each time the hell out of it and go with that. Yeah. Yeah. It might be a bit ridiculous for only taking like five sheep, but it's fine. We roll. Four sheep. But who knows where we're gonna be next year? Yeah, exactly. That is true. I would quite like a small box or one like that I could plaster out on my stickers. Oh my god, have you seen the is it MTech? Their livestock boxes.

unknown 33:20

MTech.

SPEAKER_00 33:21

Have a look. MTech Livestock Boxes, and they do incredible sign writing on livestock boxes. Where are they? Instagram, TikTok, Facebook. All of it. Um, literally the M T E C. I feel like I might have seen one of these very, very recently. It they were at Cornwall Show. That might be where. Yeah, they like plaster your sign writing and it looks so smart. But do I need to buy a brand new stock box with sign writing on? No. Is it gonna be something you've always wanted? If you've I just think if you're financially able to do it and it's something that's always gonna niggle you that you never done. But also done in more in the long run. I get it if you're travelling about loads and you're showing loads, but at the end of the day. Well, you did see these guys. Pretty incredible. Um, but do I actually need the advertisement? And do I need a new livestock box? No. Do you reckon they might do it with an old one? Don't know. Um, who else did I look at? I looked at the Eiffel Williams. Yeah. Can't remember what, very easily stolen, which does push me more towards the personalised. Yeah. Um, this was a Scott actually went and saw it, spoke to the dealer at Devon County. They had a second hand, but it was only like six months old, maybe 12 months old. Uh 12 foot single, like half the height, um, sheep deck. Not sheep deck, sheep trailer. Um, I think it's a TA 512 or something.

unknown 35:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 35:08

Um, might be wrong. Um was it 14 foot? And I was just like, that's a bit long. And he's like, yeah, but you're not better getting longer. And then I know a single one's harder to steer. Great. Like a smaller one. Because it just catches in your like drift quicker. Yeah. Have you ever had to do a trailer license? No, I was within the age bracket that got away with it. Same here. We're basically the same age, aren't we? Just a few months between us. Is it just a few months? Yeah, it's not. Well, it's not a year. December. December the No, no, I know it's Christmas Day. 2001. 2001. No. So I No, actually, yeah, six months. Yeah. Yeah, six months. So we're not it's not like No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Eighteen months. It's eighteen months. What year are you? 2000. June 2000. That's 18 months. Maybe Yeah. Year and a half. I'm not mathing. Clearly I am. Um yeah, so I don't know what I want to do on that front, but um, I've got a month to sort. I'm sure some will let you borrow one though, won't they?

unknown 36:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:32

Yeah, I well, gotta pull in some favours, maybe. Yeah. Like I'm sure it'd be fine. Yeah. Why Nigel decided to sell his stock box without speaking to me from forehanders? Well done, Nigel. Yeah, we won't talk about that one. What a day. What a day. That was not a highlight of my day. I was like, Nigel, how do you think I'm getting to Devon County now? Oh, I hadn't thought about that. No, what did they get instead? A Roland tractor. You did say this actually. Um, like size cattle livestock, what is it, like 36-foot trailer? Yeah, you did say this, yeah. Yeah, pop that on the back of the Yaudi. Why not? Whoop whoop. No, no, we're not. So that's when I had to put my sheep out in the field. We had to take the Roland's. Love that. It's great. Great. Replay, let's do it again. No, let's not. Let's not do that. So when we have to bring all the sheep back in, at the minute it's with the cattle box.

unknown 37:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:51

Cattle trailer. Yeah, I do see your reason for getting a box. But like I said, it's if I buy new, I don't have to go and view it, which then obviously saves me a lot of hassle. But then it's new. Do I need new? No. Or do I buy second hand for what I need it for now when I don't know what I need? Yeah. Because currently I'm not set on what I need. Therefore, is it better just to buy second hand and then once I know what I need, I can then buy something permanent. I think maybe it's worth waiting until you really know. Well, I can't because I've got a month to figure it out before the next show. Maybe pull a string or two. Borrow someone's trailer. Yeah. And then To be fair, people might sell them after show season. Yeah. I think that's more worth it. Yeah. Is it a big investment? I don't think you should rush into it. So's buying four sheep. It was the famous sheep that sold you. I didn't buy him because he's I didn't. I don't even know whether he's gonna be famous. Clapchaser. This is only because Abby, what were you shouting at me outside Morrison's? Scammer. Scammer. Uh no. It was thief, because you stole, okay? I didn't realise I stole. Well, you did. I did force Abby to correct it to unintentional faith. She still could have gone back and given her money. Yeah, I didn't think of that. I could have. But I didn't, so I'm sorry. So no, it's Morrisons. If you're watching this, this is April Fool's. Uh no, this is because you probably don't pay your farmers right in the first place. I don't know. Morrisons are pretty good at backing their farming. I was gonna say, I was I was gonna retract the statement because actually I don't know what they're like on No, they're pretty they're pretty good at supporting the farmers, I think. Oh no! No, I don't think they are. Yeah, they say they do, but do you remember? Well, it was because it's my local big distributor, the Morrisons on the M5, the farmers quite often have the blockages there because they're usually one of the ones that have problems. So I'm sorry, Morrisons, I don't actually know your involvement at the minute. So I might rest retract my statement. I might not like to make it clear that I have not made a statement. Um but you stole. Oh piss off. They might the police might come for you now. No, please don't do that. I already ate my chicken and sandwich. This is a whole tangent. Oh

Supermarket Trip Ends With Police

SPEAKER_00 40:50

god. You know Abby doesn't go out. Yeah. Guess who went to the supermarket for once in a bloody blue moon? On their own? No, I wasn't on my own. And ends up on the way back, ending up sitting in the police car to give a statement. Why is this shit happened to you? All the time. Right, what who did you try and crash into this time or who crashed in front of you? No, literally, somebody pulled out on the car in front of me. It was quite an ordeal. Ambulances, the whole lot. Oh sugar. I'm not gonna go into it because there's a lot of personal things that um and anyway, so I've got so basically the car pulled out on a car and it was into the passenger side. The passenger, so the driver was stuck in because she had hurt her neck. The passenger, on the other hand, was fairly autistic and having a panic attack. Oh no. I bent the car door and I got her out and sat her in my car. So then when we need to give a statement, it was absolutely lashing it down uh with rain, and I need to give a statement. And the police lady was like, Any chance you can come and sit in the car? And I was like, Have I got to sit in the back? She's like, No, you can sit in the front. I was like, Thank God for that, because otherwise I would have been like bawling my eyes out. Yeah, thinking you're in trouble. Yeah. I should have taken some handscuff. Did you give a statement or did you have to support the autistic person? Or both? Both. Yeah. Um, I should have said, Can I have a handscuff for some content, please? I know. But somebody was being wheeled off in an ambulance. I felt it wasn't the time. Tomatoes, tomatoes. Anyway, have been back in contact with the girls. They're all good. I have made sure they're all fine. Perfect. Yeah, they have text. Love that. They weren't like both. Lost a sheep blanket to a car accident.

unknown 42:43

Oh.

SPEAKER_00 42:44

It was a really cute blanket. It was a matching set for the kids' beds. Oh.

unknown 42:48

I know.

SPEAKER_00 42:48

Or for the greater good. Yeah, I put it on the old man that was really shivery and just went. They were also okay a few days later. Anyway, carry on. Anyway, yeah, that's pretty much the end of my story. But it it always happens to me. It does. You end up in weird situations. Always happens to me. Anyway, on that note, we're gonna say Cheerio. And catch you back next week for another episode. I think we're gonna speak about So scrap that. We're not gonna tell you. We're not gonna tell you what we're filming next week. We're gonna catch you next week. I think we might have just told them. Anyway, I'm gonna beep it out. There are so many beeps, so much editing in this stuff, and I am sorry because I would rather not edit it either. But we say too much stuff that we can't repeat. Anyway, bye for now. Bye.