How to Be Unapologetically Yourself and Build a Magnetic Personal Brand with Jojo Kearney

In this episode of Unshakeable Talks, Katy is joined by Jojo, a strategic self-expression coach who helps women turn their identity into their greatest business asset. They talk about what it really means to stop shape-shifting for approval, reclaim the parts of you that have been called ‘too much,’ and become unapologetically magnetic in life and business. Jojo shares the identity shakeup that’s happened for her over the last few months, from hiding behind outfits and external validation to becoming the woman who walks into a room and is instantly remembered for her energy, presence and self-trust.

Key Takeaways:

Your ‘too much’ is actually an asset

The traits you’ve been told to tone down - being loud, colourful, emotional, extra - are often the exact things that make you magnetic to the right people and clients. When you build a brand around those traits instead of hiding them, you stop attracting the wrong people and start calling in the ones who are truly meant to be in your world.

External validation will always keep you small

When your worth is tied to how noticed, praised or approved you are, every room becomes a test and every comment can knock your confidence. Shifting focus opens up space to actually receive opportunities, growth and genuine connection.

Authenticity is vulnerable, but it’s where magnetism lives

Being your whole self is confronting, because it makes you a mirror for everyone else’s insecurities, projections and unfulfilled desires. Some people will be triggered, but others will feel deeply seen and permissioned to be themselves too - and those are the people your work is for.

You attract as much as you repel

When you accept that magnetism includes both attraction and repulsion, criticism stops meaning ‘there’s something wrong with me’ and starts signalling that your message is clear and potent.

Discipline and identity shifts change your reality

Treating discipline as self-respect, not punishment, creates compounding evidence that you can trust yourself, which transforms how you show up everywhere.

If you enjoyed this episode, you can connect with Jojo on Instagram @ThrivewithJoJo. You can also join Jojo in her free telegram channel Heart Led Hotline to hear all her riffs and audio expansions in one place. 

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Unshakeable Talks! If this episode helped you, make sure you hit subscribe so you never miss an episode, and leave a review to share your thoughts - I love hearing from you. 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:00

Welcome to the Unshakable Talks with me, Katie Schweiger. This is where we talk about the unshakable women behind the businesses. We are lifting the lid on what it really takes to run a business, to scale a business, to get into business while also creating a life you love. On the Unshakable Talks, we are all about talking about the conversations everyone is scared to talk about. We are really lifting the lid on what it really takes to become unshakable within business and life. At today's episode of The Unshakable Talks, I'm speaking to Jojo. And Jojo is a self-impression coach who helps women to turn their identity as the best business asset. And she is the most magnetic and authentic person herself. So please come and watch it. Welcome to the unshakable talks, Jojo. I'm so excited you're here. This is gonna be the most fun interview ever. And I know you can't wait. So let's I mean, I wanna actually do this episode differently. I usually start from who was Jojo before she's now, what you're doing now, but I actually want to dive in straight away because you are self-impression coach, you are helping women to really use their identity um within their business and really turn their business around to become unapologetically magnetic. But you had quite a bit of a shift going on yourself uh in over the last couple of months. So tell me a little bit about this, tell me about yourself, tell me about why you do what you're doing.

SPEAKER_02 1:33

Yes, oh my god, okay, wait. This is why I feel like we need 700 hours because uh if you knew me, we met in December, which is through two months ago. You didn't meet this version of me.

SPEAKER_04 1:47

I actually met you the first time at the Swapped One.

SPEAKER_02 1:50

Oh shit balls, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:51

So I obviously didn't make an impression that we can't remember.

SPEAKER_02 1:54

No, I don't remember anything from that time. The trauma is covering it all up. No, I'm kidding. Yeah, but I really have gone through so many evolutions just in the last year that I I literally feel it in my bones. If you met me at any time, honestly, sooner than six weeks ago, you haven't met me because the shifts that I've been through over the last even, even just I'm gonna zoom in on the six weeks really because for the last six weeks I've truly been rigging life in my favour in a way that I have never been so consistent at or like convicted in in my entire life. And I've been a self-development junkie since I was since I popped out the womb. Do you know what I mean? I've always been in this like better myself, but like mindset. Like I've I've I was kind of wired from a very early age, and I think this is like my family really thrived in uh like negative gossip being the connection point. Yeah, and I think the town that I'm from, it's a very small town, it thrives off of like everybody knows everybody, gossip, gossip, gossip. And so it's a very negative space, and I think especially us UK zones, England especially, it's like you're very humble. It's it's not don't be proud to do well, it's like stay small, stay in the box. And so I learn my entire life to be quite wired to be negative, and I know so many of us feel the same way, yeah. Um, and so I've had to work really hard to not succumb to that negativity. Where have you realized this the first time? Oh, it's been there was never like an immediate shift until I'll tell you about the 8th of January, it's ingrained into my mind, but there's never been really a moment where I was like shit, something's gotta change. It was micro ways, it was holding me back. Yeah, and I know you know when you just know in your bones you're meant for something big. Oh my god, yeah. And I knew it. Oh my god, I was like a four-year-old in a tiara and a crown and a big princess dress. Like, I'm meant to be famous, like I knew it in my bones. I started dancing, I was like the light of the stage, like all eyes were on me. I was like, yes, I'm meant for big things. There was one thing that was holding me back consistently in everything that I did, and it was that like confidence to really own that I don't even want to say potential because it feels so much bigger, but that light that we naturally have when we're kids, everyone's got this light, this like this care freeness, isn't it? Yeah, it's like awe and wonder and joy and excitement and passion, and you lose it in my and it's not in big ways, and you might think, oh, there's like that time someone told me I was being too loud and I doled it down. Yes, there's that, but there's also just tiny, tiny little ways that you can't even put your finger on as to when it gets knocked down, and that was happening just constantly for me. It was like I'd go on stage as a dancer, and it would be like, I don't know, I I could see it, and I'm sure everyone else was, and I did get a lot of feedback like, oh my god, you were like the light of the stage, you were the best person on stage, all eyes were glued to you, and I was like, No, I could tell I was going at like one percent of what I should have been doing, I could tell that I wasn't playing full out, and I think over time that became the default. I could get away with not really playing full out.

SPEAKER_04 5:15

Did you try to stay palatable for people? Oh because you have a huge character, and I absolutely love to survive you. But when I met you the first time, I didn't see that side of you visually in the way you dress and the colours and everything, absolutely, yeah. But when I talk to you, which you can't remember, and no, I'll leave the podcast now. No, no, no, no, but when I talk to you, or when I um when you talk to other people, I couldn't see that confidence.

SPEAKER_02 5:44

Yeah, definitely not because it was for my entire life, it was a mask for maybe lack of confidence or more so confidence when I'm myself, yeah, but it always being wrong in other people's eyes. It was always you're too much, you're too loud, you're too emotional, you're too buzzy, like I can't, I can only handle you in small doses. You know, it was constant, this constant narrative of like you're too much. And so, although I love being too much, and it's like, yes, that's where I'm in my element, it's where I'm most criticized. And I have like historically, not anymore, because new identity, but I've historically had this like I'm deathly afraid of people judging me, of being wrong, of being criticized of being judged, just I have such a fear of rejection.

SPEAKER_04 6:31

We all have because we all just want to fit in. No one likes to be rejected. Whoever says, Oh, I don't mind being rejected, you're lying. No one likes to be rejected, everyone seeks validation from outside, and we all just want to be liked and accepted for who we are. And obviously, if you are very loud like you, and I personally love this about you, because I'm not that loud, and I almost sometimes look at people like you thinking, oh, I wish I would have a little bit of her. Yeah, um, but I recognize for what it is, that's my own kind of insecurity, and it doesn't make me bitter. But what happens is I think a lot of people look at you and really deep down subconsciously want to have a little piece of you, want to be a bit more open authentically, and but not giving a shit what other people think. Yeah, and um are actually because they they really want this, it turns into this frustration and negativity and this envy, and then the pushback for you to criticism.

SPEAKER_02 7:24

That's it, and it was it was like a constant I'm me in my full authentic energy is a mirror for everybody in the room, and I think like people who are naturally magnetic or have been like a bigger character in their past have always been told they're wearing a mask, and like, oh, I can't wait for that mask to drop. And people tell me this all the time, they're like, just wait, that mask is gonna drop, and the real you is gonna come out. And I'm like, no, this is the real me. The problem is where you're resisting yourself, and this is where this authentic uh thread has kind of woven into my work over the last year. When you are being your whole self, that's the most vulnerable place to be absolutely because you are so seen, and that was the thing that I couldn't handle was being so um good with myself that it might have made other people feel comfor uncomfortable, and that was what I couldn't handle. I needed, I was like a golden retriever. I need everyone in the room to be okay. Yeah, is everyone okay? Is everyone good? And so I'm constantly shape-shifting to be what everybody needs me to be.

SPEAKER_04 8:27

So you were wearing the mask, yeah, the wrong mask. And what happens with this is you attract people who are not meant to be in your world. Yeah, because I had to learn this as well. You attract people who either take advantage of you or who are coming in for the wrong reasons, and then obviously uh may not get the results they're wanting to, or or whatever it is, but blaming you, blaming like you're not what or whatever, whatever it is. I don't know if that happened for you. I'm just going for my own kind of experiences as well. But it always starts with us, it always starts with our expectations, how we feel about ourselves, and what we actually really want to achieve. And most of us don't know this, so we're projecting it onto other people, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 9:05

And this was the thing that I wasn't I wasn't taking any responsibility. So I'm like big fat victim central, I'm like wearing my victim hat, like the world is so against me, and I think this is where like the last I've been there's three events that really stand out in my mind, and this is where probably that that event that we first met at was wedged in between the two events that I'm so let's talk about our three events, let's talk about event number one. Okay, so event number one, I would I went to Florida at the end of 2024, and before I attended this event, I'd gone into like a deep spiral of um who am I? Like I had to figure out who I am, like I need to know who I am so that I can be who I am out loud. And so I was right. Well, I'm pink, duh, because of course, like I've I've been wrong for being pink, and I think this is another thing as well is the things that you've been made wrong for.

SPEAKER_04 10:00

How can you be wrong for being pink?

SPEAKER_02 10:02

Oh, because you're not professional. People have told me to tone down the pink because it's not professional, so why go pinker and do it? And don't you look fabulous?

SPEAKER_04 10:09

I know, and I've been packing.

SPEAKER_01 10:10

And don't you feel kind of iconic?

SPEAKER_04 10:12

I absolutely feel kind of iconic. I never used to wear pink, yeah. But I've still got it because I used to be fat and I didn't look like pink, and I didn't want to look like Miss Peggy. I mean, to be honest, um, so my wardrobe was always black, and when I planned the outfits for this um recording, um I my daughter said, but just wear something black. It's always you always look good in black. And I'm like, Well, the problem is my wardrobe actually hasn't got much black in it nowadays. So the more confident I wear, obviously, I lost quite a bit of weight, the more comf confident I've uh got within myself. Yeah, I definitely have much more colour in my wardrobe, and I'm loving pink.

SPEAKER_02 10:46

Yeah, well, that's it. You got good with yourself, and I think especially the colour pink. This is I I have this conversation dripped all the time because it's like it's not about wearing pink, it's about reclaiming the things that you felt wrong for your entire life. And so pink for me was one of those things, it's like girlhood, being like out loud with who you actually are, embracing, you know, being chalant. Everyone talks about like be cool, be collected, be non-chalant. And I'm like, no, be the most out loud version of you. Yeah. And so pink for me was a self-expression thing. It was like when I wear pink, I it's like you know, the Superman pose. Yeah, wearing pink for me is like the Superman pose. It's like I feel my most confident when I'm in pink. Is why I'm gonna be honest, I'm I'm secretly not anymore because I've changed my identity, but deathly afraid of getting my colours done. Because I'm like, they're gonna tell me pink doesn't look good on me, and I'm not gonna care. And I'm gonna wear it anyway, knowing that I might look like a bag of shit. But I don't care, and this is the thing, I think this idea of self-expression and being your whole self. Let me come back to this um event because this event, I was like, my entire wardrobe was pink, my suitcase looked incredible, but I every single day I got changed into my outfits and I was like wearing them as a cover-up, as a mask, so that I didn't have to show people who I was. And I was an entitled princess with love to myself, and so I walk into this event, and I'm expecting because in my life up until that point, I had built a reputation, people knew who I was in my local area, in my niche that I'd been in before. So I was like, people know me, it's just an expectation. People know who I am. And I walk into this room of 500 women, and not a single fucker knows who I am. But not only do they not know who I am, they don't care about me. And me being unnoticed is like I'm going home and throwing a tantrum and never going out in public again. Like it was like a literally, it brought up this like feeling of being unwanted, unseen, misunderstood, not acknowledged, not noticed. And so I really had this moment with myself. I went back to my hotel room and I was like, I cannot continue operating this way where my entire focus is external validation. Because if I continue to do this, not only am I not able to receive the information that's at this incredible event, I touch down in Florida, which is the first time I've been to America. And if you've never been to America, your world view gets cracked open because everything is just like on everything's huge, everything is bigger, and it just immediately I stepped off the plane and I was like, Oh, it's time to think bigger. Like I am microscopic in this massive landscape. This is incredible. It felt like possibility, it didn't feel like expansive, is well, yeah. I didn't feel like a small fish in a massive ocean that's drowning. Oh my god, this is horrible. It was like, oh, I've been I've been really playing at 1%. So I walk in, I'm in pink, I feel insignificant, and I go inward. Yeah. And the whole event, I'm conscious of how I look, I'm worried about how I'm perceived, I'm not soaking up the information and getting the life-changing result that I want from the event because I'm so externally focused. Fast forward to disrupt like when when we first met, I was in this phase of like I'd had this breakthrough of like I can't be externally validated anymore. But that was my driver, that was how I've operated my entire life. Centre stage, front of the show in the dance recital, like be front of the stage, get 100% on the dance exam, be the best there is. And suddenly, when that was no longer the focus, like the external measure wasn't there, everything crumbled. I was like, uh, I don't know who I am, B, my life was a little bit of a shit show behind the scenes. There was a lot of like, a lot of people died around me in 2025. Five, there was just a lot of like personal stuff going on, so I completely lost my entire self-concept when everything I ever knew about my life was focused on what other how other people perceived me. And so came to that event, and I really was like kind of finding my feet with the idea of life, isn't about finding yourself, it's about creating yourself every day. It doesn't, it doesn't, you don't you can just wake up and be who you want to be. It's not about oh my god, I'm lost because I don't know who I am. It's like what a blessing to not know who you are, go find out. Yeah, you know, it was that energy and create yourself, exactly that. And so I went into this first event, still in that energy of the first of event that I went to, where I was like, oh, I'm still somewhat not sure how I'm supposed to exist in this realm. I stuck to my friendship group that I had instead of mingling with other people, and it was very much just like tiptoeing around the event, and I was kind of there to soak up the value of the the event because I'd had the context of the first event where I didn't get what I knew what I wanted to get from the actual learnings because I wasn't listening. I was too busy going, how do I look for the person behind me? Am I okay? Like, do I look cute from this angle?

SPEAKER_04 15:56

Because what's your security blanket almost like exactly that?

SPEAKER_02 16:00

Yeah, and so Denver comes around. This is was it September? I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 16:06

Some sometime I think it was around September, November time, something like this.

SPEAKER_02 16:09

Yeah, I think it was September. September comes around. I'm fully let my hair down, like gained so much kind of self-trust that like I don't have to know who I am. My sole job for this trip, this was like I poured my life savings into this trip. It was huge, it was like such a big expense. And I was like, I'm gonna give it everything I've got, and not from a place of I've got to show up, but from a place of I'm embracing just being my whole self. I don't need to be liked by anyone, yeah, I don't need anyone to know who I am because I learned my lesson the hardware the first time through a tantrum about it. And I'm I'm good being an unknown, going to a 1,000-person event with no one caring about me. I want to be there and I want to be present and I want to like show up for me.

SPEAKER_04 16:55

I know how that meant. I don't have I don't know, but I bet you entered a room and people actually did recognise you.

SPEAKER_02 17:02

I so one I walked into the room first day. This was like pre-day, so like VIP day, the day before the event, and someone came up to me who I hadn't I didn't know they existed, I don't know who they were. Still actually with love, sorry about me, don't know who they are, came over and said, Hi, I don't know who you are, but I just feel like I need a picture with you. I was like, Yes, I'm really okay, snap, snap. And I was like, that was weird, but love that. Like, shook hands. We were like rushing to get to our seat, so we didn't really have a conversation. And then a couple minutes later, another person came over. Oh my god, you're Jojo. Me? I'm like, you shouldn't know who I am because I'm not present in the programme that's associated with the event. I haven't been online. I'd ghosted Instagram for like five months at this point. Nobody should know who I am. They did, and I was like, oh my god, I love this. I can find an autograph. No, I was like, let's have a picture, blah blah blah. It ended up just being a constant cycle of over 50 women out of the thousand asking for a photo, coming to introduce themselves, being completely across the room, running, like bolting over to me and saying, I just had to tell you, you've given me full permission to be myself. And I'm like, what do you mean? I'm like, I'm not even wearing my cutest outfits today. And they were like, You just the way that you are walking around this room, I can't take my eyes off you. And it was like, it got me because and I called my mum that day. I'd like 50 people. I was like, what? I counted the story views. That's just the story views that people actually put on and tagged me. And I called my mum and I was like, Mum, I found it. I found the thing that I'm meant to do. And it wasn't necessarily give people permission to be themselves, but model what really actual letting yourself be who you are. I was like, that's what I'm supposed to do. It's magnetism, yeah, but it's magnetism through the lens of authenticity and like really turning up your self-expression. And my mum went, obviously. I was like, what do you mean? Obviously. I was like, Mum, I've been a business owner for 10 years. Why haven't you told me? She was like, This was you in your dance recitals on stage. All the mums would come up to me, oh my god, I couldn't take my eyes off your daughter.

SPEAKER_04 19:08

But you wouldn't have seen it if your mum would have told you. I think you had to go for that for that process to actually come to yourself and realise that this is what you need to do.

SPEAKER_02 19:19

Yeah, and that was just it, that was a light bulb. That was one of those dropped, oh my god, this this is landed in my lap, the universe showed me, and it was one of those moments that I was like, I can't take that back now, yeah, and go back to who I was before. There's just no way that the the me that I am now can ever go back to the me I was five minutes ago.

SPEAKER_04 19:41

So, what's the first thing you've done when you came back from Denver? What was the first? Because being in an expansive um environment, and I've been on um a couple of retreats last year and stuff, there's always it quite something open in you. It changes the whole landscape of who you are, how you look at things, and in turn also how you want your business to look like. Yeah. So, what was the first thing JoJo did when she came home? Do you know what I did?

SPEAKER_02 20:06

No, I came home and I got a message from a client, and my world came crashing back down. And it was like, come back down to earth, you're not meant to be big, you're not meant to be bold, you're not meant to be, you know, a big deal. The message was basically saying, You've left us high and dry by going to America, and you've kind of like you've expanded too much, we don't like it. And it was this idea that oh, I'm bragging because I'm in America, and so I didn't share any photos, any videos, any takeaways out loud, like on Instagram. Um, because people were like offended by how big I was feeling and how big I was going. You went back, right, right. Yeah, I should say past client, but that was it was it I reverted straight back. I came straight back to oh, yeah, there we go. Another confirmation yeah, being big, playing big, showing up, being your whole self repels people. And that was again, and now I'm like, oh, lesson in the art of magnetism. You attract as much as you repel. Absolutely. I had all of this attract energy. Of course, the repel was gonna be there. I just hadn't, I just shocker, listen and take on and take to heart the negative feedback way more than that same day, in probably the same hour, one of my other clients messaged, like, I'm so jealous of you being America. And I was thinking, oh god, another another terrible message. And she was like, I can't wait for that to be me. And I was like, That is seeing something, admitting, yeah, I'm jealous as shit. Like, I want a piece of that. Of course, that's like the projection coming up.

SPEAKER_04 21:58

But that's gonna be her driver as well. To actually move forward and towards this goal.

SPEAKER_02 22:03

That's it. And I was like, I'll take you next year. Yeah. And I it just immediately was like, yes.

SPEAKER_04 22:07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:08

I like you can be jealous. I think jealousy points places for you. I think it shows you what you really want or what you're craving. Yeah. Um, or where you're maybe falling short of what you actually want to do for yourself. But I think there's a there's an acknowledgement or an awareness around it. And I don't know if it's just emotional intelligence to be able to be like, yeah, I see that. I'm clocking it. I got jealous and I was ready to bitch about you for just one second. And that now I know, oh yeah, I want a piece of that.

SPEAKER_03 22:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:36

And it was like such a beautiful moment because it was like, yes, let's do it. Next next year we're going to events together. And now if I have an event coming up, I'll text her and be like, Do you want to come to this event? I'm going. And so it's beautiful because there's there's always going to be the duality. It but what are you focused on? Because I focused on the negative, and I said, Oh, can't be big, can't brag about being on this trip of a lifetime, can't be too much. Tone it down.

SPEAKER_04 23:04

But she did that because this was part of your life, your whole life, your whole upbringing. But actually, what people hire you to do is the positive, is the magnetism, is exactly who you are. Because I obviously knew you from the online space, and I always looked at you as this magnetic person, always seen you as a super confident person. So for me, it was super interesting to hear this story between the uh One America event and disrupt. Because when I met you at Disrupt, I immediately thought, oh, she's completely different to what she's online. Because you were I now that you are not a backstory, it I understand that you were almost like um going on eggshells because you didn't want to be fully seen. Yeah, but for me from the outside, I want to see you fully, like I see you today fully, and I absolutely love it. Um, and people who don't want to see you fully, they're not meant to be in your world, anyways.

SPEAKER_02 23:58

And yeah, and that's it. That's really that the the hardest lesson that I learned in 2025 was like, you're not meant for everybody, and I think that was the problem. I was like, I'm gonna be really big and I'm gonna be in my whole self until it's rejected, and then I'll dull it back down again because I'll yeah, it's it is a problem, you're right. And I think now, and and I I taught a program just after um the event in Denver, and I and it was it was called extra, and it was about being extra, it was about being your most, your biggest self. And before I went to Denver, it was about being uh out loud, not necessarily loud, you don't need to be loud, but you need to be who you are out loud, and that means being too much, yeah, and everyone's too much, even if you're like, no, I'm not enough because you think you're too much of something, yeah. And so it was really about how to turn the volume up on that thing that makes you too much, the thing that you've been made wrong for, because that's the asset that people are looking for in their businesses, yeah. And then I went to Denver and I realized there's depth to this that isn't just about being over the top, confident, dramatic, you know, big deal character. There's depth that I wasn't even allowing myself to have because the character side of me was always celebrated. And this is why I'm like shaking people when they're not being themselves on the internet, because so much of it is a performance, it's a persona, and even if it's like I've got to turn it on and be professional, and now I'm reading off a script, or it's the other direction where they go into their shell a little bit more and they just kind of don't really have the confidence to say what they want to say, it's like say what you want to say with your full chest, let it land where it lands, and it's okay if it's not the right message for everyone. It's hard though.

SPEAKER_04 25:43

Yeah, the first video I recorded online, it was just a story video. I'd sat in the garden for two and a half hours on their table outside.

SPEAKER_02 25:53

Why? Like, what was coming up for you in that moment?

SPEAKER_04 25:57

I don't know, actually, because I've this was I've never been on an Instagram live, I've never kind of spoke. Obviously, I had my personal Instagram account. I started my professional Instagram account more with like motivational quotes and uh re-sharing things like this. But this was the f first moment where I kind of, other than static pictures, kind of put myself out there, and I had all sorts of things. Does my hair look okay? I need to put have a full face of makeup. Oh my my eyelids are hooded, so I'm gonna put my my my glasses on. So like all sorts of insects all the insecurities we all carry come came out in one girl, and I was sitting there, I'm like, fuck's sake, all I'm gonna say is XYZ. Why can't I just talk that into the camera? And it took me ages.

SPEAKER_02 26:41

Yeah, well, this is it. Two reasons. One, because it's vulnerable as shit.

SPEAKER_04 26:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 26:46

To especially if you've hidden and loads of people do this, they go, Can I build a faceless brand? And I'm like, You can try, but like it it takes a second versus like years. But the motivational quotes were a safety net, yeah, they were like a way, it's like me wearing pink the first time was like it's a shield, no, everyone can comment on my pink fur coat instead of me as the human inside, it's that vulnerability that shines through, but it's also with so much love, me too, you're making it about you. Yeah. When it's about the message that's coming through, it's about the thing that's on your heart that you can't not turn your camera on and share today. And I think if so if if everybody on the internet, quite frankly, could get back to that, we would all have way bigger businesses, but we would all be so much more connected to each other and ourselves.

SPEAKER_04 27:33

That is so true.

SPEAKER_02 27:34

I think that's what's missing, is especially with the rise of AI. Look, I'm a big chat GPT fan on paper, but I really rebel against it, especially with content creation, even coaching, like people are using it in their coaching now, and it's it's become such a beast that people have stopped trusting what they actually have to say anymore.

SPEAKER_04 27:55

Also, as a consumer, you don't actually know what is surreal anymore and what not. But having said that, the caveat of this is people like you that will not be a problem for you because I actually think that society in general will seek more people like you. I think the audaciousness you have and the authenticity, this will be what people will buy into much more. So one day you were almost too much for them, this is actually what they're now want.

SPEAKER_02 28:25

Yeah, it's like but I think this is so true for every business owner. They start off with the audacity, they start off with the audit or authenticity, and they start off with the aliveness because they don't know any better. And then we learn the strategies and the tactics and the trends and the hooks and how you're supposed to show up, and we get professional and polished and create this energy of like I've got to perform for you now, and it becomes so structured that you lose the human that's required. And especially in I I work a lot with people in the coaching space specifically, personal brands, coaches, um, in loads of different niches, but it's all the same. It's like you have to have that human element, and this is where it's like you can argue that some industries might be flopping in the rise of AI that like it's going to take over and you don't need to be your type of industry. I would argue if you're a coach, you're always going to be a coach first. Yeah. And if you're relying so heavily on AI to do your content creation for you, your coaching layouts. Like I've been to events where it's like all of the slides, you can see that they're even if you can't tell because of the end dashes and all the things, the cadence, the rhythm, the layout, the structure, the way you form sentences, it's all the exact same. You can tell that it's it's lost that natural trust and connection that you get from human to human contact. Yeah, that it's literally a brain reaction. It's like there's oxytocin that gets released. Like we're giving each other a hug right now because we're two humans connecting. You can tell when that's missing, even if you can't tell why. There's an internal rug. And it's why we just scroll, scroll, scroll because everything's with so much love, the exact same now.

SPEAKER_04 30:12

So let's fast forward to the 8th of January. Because Denver happened, you had this experience with your former client, but also you had this experience with a nice client. You ran the program Xtram, which on the back of Denver you changed slightly around. What happened on the 8th of January?

SPEAKER_02 30:36

So after after Denver, after I ran Extra, Extra really healed a part of me that was like uh still clinging on to the thing I think I am a bit too much still, even though I'm teaching you how to be too much and turn it into your leverage. Yeah, I still think I'm a little bit much. That really healed a part of me, but it then brought up a lot of other, you know, underlying stuff. And so from honestly, November until the 8th of January. The 7th of January, to be precise, until the 7th of January, I was in this like mini spiral in myself of like I don't really know what I wanna stand for. I know it's this like triple threat of magnetism the authenticity, the aliveness, and the audacity, but how I bring that forward and if it really matters, I I was struggling with that like real North Star, and I decided on the 7th of January to pick up a book called Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself. Have you read it? No. Oh my god, okay, it's brilliant. Even if you're not like a manifestation gorilly, yeah, doctor, and no matter how you feel about Dr. Joe Dispenser, he's very much about like uh law of attraction, manifestation, that sort of that sort of vibes. I picked up this book and I I don't know what urged me to do it. I think I'd seen a TikTok and someone had said about a chapter from it. I was like, that sounds interesting. And I thought the even the concept breaking the habit of being yourself, I'm like, me, it's a no I'm myself. And and then I was like, no, what he's saying there, without having re read the blob or anything, what he's saying there is breaking the habit of being who you think you should be, yeah. So that you can be your whole self. And that concept I could, you know, I could get down a dirty with.

SPEAKER_03 32:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:16

And so I picked up the book, and for chapter one, chapter one, I was listening to chapter one, and they gave a study, and I won't mention it here because I'm aware that we have 0.5 minutes left. Maybe we'll do a part two and I'll I'll go into it. But this study was speaking about how it was like a real-time showing of how your thoughts and your feelings being in alignment actually influence reality. Yeah, and like, yes, makes sense on paper, and like, yes, I've heard this concept before, it's not novel, but it was just in that moment, it was the exact right time for me to hear it. It was said in the exact right way that I could consume it, yeah, and I think I was ready for it in that moment. I think you have the it you can't just read something or watch something.

SPEAKER_04 33:01

That's a really important point because I have a cupboard full of self-help books and everything else, but I need it. Like, I always picked them up, I started reading it and I never finished them until I really needed it. I was at the point where I was able to receive what uh the information I was reading.

SPEAKER_02 33:20

Yeah, but I think this is also why like so. On my I I ran a retreat this year, and on my retreat, I was like, there's so much that I want to bring, but I feel like there's a you have to be able to receive it. And if you're not in that state, and now I know you can get into that state, and so the next retreat, I've oh my god, the plans for my next retreat it's gonna be so juicy. But this the idea of elevating your emotional state, which is the feelings, yeah, uh part of the electromagnetic current, and then the focused intention, both have to be operating in alignment, and that influences your reality, but it also just because it changes your state, it changes the way that you are able to receive opportunities, it keeps you open-minded, it lowers your cortisol. Like, there's so many obviously benefits to it, but that's why sometimes you can binge like this. Why I don't binge self-development or trainings or even podcasts with so much love, I'll binge this. But like this why I don't over-consume anymore because I'm just doing it for the sake of it, just to tick it off a list instead of feeling like this is really speaking to me, or I really am feeling in like the vibe of I want to learn something that's gonna help me change my life. And that day, the 7th of January, was just a day where I felt like I was called to get into this juice that was this book, and then chapter one, this study, just hit a light bulb because it was like this is everything I teach, but I just didn't have the language to support what was going on. Like, this has given me the science, the evidence to say I better back myself, yeah. But not only that, it was it was the catalyst for me actually deciding I am going to change my life, and not in every other way I'd done it in the past, which is like I really want to change my life, so I'm gonna try really hard to just be someone else or like go to the gym or eat healthy, and it's it I'd wake up every day and be like CBA for that. Yeah, it was no, you have to actively feel like it, and if you don't feel like it, there is a way to change that so that you do, and that was what I wasn't grasping was I would wake up and be inconsistent because I either felt like it or I didn't. And I want you at a sweet spot where you actually feel like it, anything is possible, it really is anything is possible, but that's hard to maintain if you're not actively putting yourself into that mode, and so I was like half feeling like it, half not feeling like it, and so I would do it on one day, and then later in the day I couldn't be asked, so I'd go back immediately to my old self. But on the 8th of January, I just decided I'm gonna be a morning person and I'm an 11am wake-up girly, historically, not anymore.

SPEAKER_04 36:08

Oh no, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_02 36:09

But I'm I that was the I was like, I'm just I'm a night owl, and I was like, well, what fixed identity is that? Like if I actually want to change my life, I have to change my identity. If I want to change my identity, I have to change my patterns, my habits. And so I'm no longer going to choose the path I've always chosen because that's got me to where I am now, which isn't work, did it? No, and it it just never will because it's always gonna keep you in that same loop. And so I knew I had to break the loop, but it was this idea of discipline I've rejected my entire life. I'm like, ooh, I'm not gonna work for someone else, ooh, I'm not gonna get up with a schedule, ooh, I'm not gonna clean my room. I was like such a rebel against structure and discipline and routine, and so even with like assistance, I'm like waving to assistants in the background, being like, I rebel against you. Do you know what I mean? If you tell me to do something, I'm not gonna do it. Yeah, and I literally woke up this day on the 8th of January and I just said, Fuck that. I'm why am I continuing to stay in this victimhood of life is happening to me, and I'm like autopiloting my way through life when I've I'm literally in control of it, and this study that was in this book showed me how in control I am, and I was just like, okay, blind is on, let's freaking go. And since then, I've truly like every single time I've been like, Oh, I just want to have a lay-in today, I'll be a new person tomorrow. I'm like, that's what my aunt self would have said, yeah. So get your ass up and go and do the things you want to do with your life, and it's it's the problem is it's doing that, and it's not a problem, it's the challenge and the joy of doing it.

SPEAKER_04 37:48

It's doing it every single time you could choose the old option, but it becomes very easy, and the out like what you get from it is amazing. Yeah, actually, you you collapse time lapse because you you literally collapse time, you can achieve so much more in such a short period of time when you give yourself kind of that love, yeah, and actually and it's do like keep the promises to yourself, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:15

And I my god, I don't I have never in my life kept promises to myself. I've never been someone who is like has that self-respect to say, I'm gonna follow through and do what I said I'm gonna do. And I really just woke up that day and was like, I am I'm committed to being who I said I'm gonna be, and I'm holding myself accountable to it. And I really thought about this in my coaching spaces as well, as well. Of like, my clients really come to me, especially in Queen's State, is it's a year-long programme, it's like constant evolution for a year. You're committed to being the person you said you were gonna be. And if I want my clients to be doing that, sure as shit, I better be leading the way. Absolutely, and I wasn't for so long, even with the you know, triple threat that I teach of like authenticity, I was loyal to a past version of myself instead of being myself now. Aliveness. I'm like, you need to be alive and excited and passionate about the shit that you talk about, and then I would be like, Oh, but I don't really know what I want to do. And then I'd be like, be audacious, like go and get the life you actually want, like go and take bold risks, that's what's required. And then I'd play it safe and be like, Oh, I don't want to sell today, biker blah blah blah. And it's it you've got to be relentless in embodying who you say you fucking are. No one else is gonna do it for you either. No, but that's when you become the most magnetic version of yourself because you're you're living it and you could nobody can get you when you're actually a living, breathing example of of what you care about and what you do. I think that's why I love like I love learning from people who are just in it and doing the work and showing you the good, the bad, the ugly, yeah, all of the bits in between, and having real conversations like this because it isn't always gonna be like, yeah, I just decided on 8th of January to change my life, except I did, and it's working, but it's also hard, and I I love this about you.

SPEAKER_04 40:04

You have definitely become extremely authentic about what you show online is about, and I think this is what is attracting people towards you, yeah, because we all want to be a bit more audacious, but we don't want we want to have that realness, yeah. We want to be able to relate, and I think you actually making this huge identity shift, and in such a short period of time as well, if you think about it, then Denver is what three months ago? Yeah, is it is nothing in the quant scheme of things. Well, actually, if we are meeting again at the end of this year and looking back, oh my god, I think the clients you will be attracting for this, they're gonna be your favourite ever. This this your whole life mission is gonna completely blow up. Yeah, and I'm so excited for that. Thank you, baby doll. I'm so excited, but we have run out of time.

SPEAKER_02 40:54

I know, I'm so sorry. I've been waiting for this, but I've been trying to just like wrap it up, but but I would like to ask you the question I asked everyone at the end of the podcast.

SPEAKER_01 41:03

Oh my god, okay, wait.

SPEAKER_04 41:05

Are you ready?

SPEAKER_01 41:05

No, I'm actually not. Okay, no, I am ready.

SPEAKER_04 41:08

Okay, if you could give younger Jojo one puttily piece of advice, what would that be?

SPEAKER_01 41:15

Okay. Little Jojo in her pink tutorial, and Tiara, obviously.

SPEAKER_02 41:25

I would say that being actually being too much is the answer. And it is gonna rub people up the wrong way, and your job is to respect yourself enough and to trust yourself way more than the opinions of other people who, in the grand scheme of things, don't matter. That was a hard, hard lesson for me to learn. And I'm still learning, we're always learning, but I think actually embracing who you are at the core and and existing out loud in that, letting that be presented to the world, that's the thing that magnetizes people, that's the thing that will build your brand. And that by the way, that's why that's why literally every brand pops off, is because they're embracing that. But I think if if you can be who you are and let that be who you present yourself to be, you won't resist everything because everything's working in alignment with each other. Be the person you are on the inside out loud.

SPEAKER_04 42:26

That's the best way to end this episode. Thank you for coming on the An Shakable Talk. I love the cheers.

unknown 42:30

Oh my god!

SPEAKER_04 42:31

Alcohol free, just in case anyone cares. Yes. If you've been feeling stuck or disconnected from the woman behind your business, this is your sign. The identity shakeup is my new free audio. A short, powerful reset to help you to get clear on the person who you've become and the person your business needs next. Head to the link in the show notes to access it today.