SPEAKER_00 0:00

You know, my faith, of course, it it was it was it was stretched with a number of things because now um it's not just your household you're concerned about and we never really were because we were youth pastors, but now it's it's souls, it's burdens, is people. So we have to stay in prayer. And a lot of times the closet is my prayer time. You know, I have a closet, as I have a big closet with this one, but it still is the prayer time where I am able to just sit quietly and um just really just say it's me and God.

SPEAKER_03 1:27

Today's guest is a woman whose presence is both calming and commanding, a quiet force with a nurturing spirit. She has gracefully lived out her calling and ministry, motherhood, and mentorship. Known for her heart to empower women and build community, she leads with conviction, humility, and care. And for over 24 years, she's walked faithfully alongside her husband, Pastor Garland Mays, raising their three sons, Dorian, Gabriel, and Isaiah. Her journey hasn't always been front and center, but it's always been steady, intentional, and deeply rooted in obedience to God. She has served in ministry for nearly two decades initially with young people, and her recent appointment has allowed her to awaken the special ability to connect with women of all generations. She served in ministry for nearly two decades initially with young people, and her recent appointment has allowed her to awaken the special ability to connect with women of all generations. Whether she's serving within her church, leading through her newly launched women's ministry, or building as an independent sales director over a fast-growing unit, she continues to offer encouragement as she moves with grace that makes room for others to grow. Now, stepping into a new season with the birth of Farita May's Ministries, she is creating spaces for women to be strengthened in faith, developed in leadership, and reminded of their God-given purpose. Her story is one of transformation, trust, and quiet boldness, which is proof that elevation comes through surrender. So please welcome my friend and yours, Farita Mays. Woo!

SPEAKER_00 3:32

Yes. That was an awesome introduction. I do. That was amazing.

SPEAKER_03 3:43

I knew we were gonna hear it.

SPEAKER_00 3:45

Yes, I'm so happy to be here.

SPEAKER_03 3:46

This is awesome. I know. What's funny is I'm holding cards to have a conversation with you.

SPEAKER_00 3:52

Yeah, like you don't know me.

SPEAKER_03 3:54

That's okay. It's totally, totally cool. It's for everyone else to get to know you and to know you like I know you. Alright. Oh sorry. I'm in the middle of doing something. Am I interrupting you? I just wanted to make sure you subscribe so that you won't miss another episode of Becoming Foray. Everything that we're doing is for you and to help you learn to protect your teeth while you pursue success. So hit that subscribe button and don't forget to also hit that bell so that you'll be notified when new episodes air. Alright, see you there. Okay, so let's get them some background before I even get into some cards and questions, which we may or may not even get to. Okay. But seriously, let's see. How far does it go back? Our children are 20 and 21 years old now, and they were like four and five.

SPEAKER_00 4:49

Yeah, if they were babies.

SPEAKER_03 4:51

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_00 4:52

Years ago. Yes. And girl, we still look good. Won't he do it? Hallelujah.

SPEAKER_03 4:57

I want to say look better. Come on, somebody. Girl, you don't know me, don't start nothing. All right. I know that's right. We're good. We're good. Thank you for your grace. Yes. Um, but yes, our children, our babies were, oh my God, so young. And yeah, God put us together at a very young, tender age of four and five, or they were.

SPEAKER_04 5:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 5:23

And we were like instantly connected. Yes. I don't remember after we met not being together. Exactly. Like whatever the children were doing, whatever the school was doing, we were right there. Yeah. Pulling everybody along with us. We had a nice core group of friends that we still communicate with today. So that's a good idea. Yeah, and that's a blessing. It's a huge blessing. That's a blessing. So, first, I want to honestly take this time to go on record. I want everybody to know that we would not be sitting here in this home if it were not for you. I mean, you know that because you had to like pretty much beat it in me, like, girl, think bigger, expect greater, and you can do this. And I was like, okay. And then I had to convince my husband. But honestly, thank you so much for always expecting more and pulling me up. Like, I don't know, I'm sure you did. Have bad days and bad times, but you're not one of those friends that when you are, you calling me to tell me how bad your time is and how bad you are. We have friends like that, don't we? We we all do. And it's it's okay sometimes, but I don't I don't uh expect that and have that history with you and that experience with you. And I thank you for that because sometimes you really don't need to hear that. And you for one know my strengths, I know your strengths, so that negativity never like sits well with me, and then I'm going into warfare and praying and somebody not receiving and paying attention. But you operate in not just your gifts and your talents, but you oper operate in your grace, and when you're graced with something, you extend that grace. And so thank you so very, very much. You impart it to everyone around you. Um, everyone who comes in contact with you know what to expect. And it is, hey beautiful, is everything alright? Like tell me if somebody is bothering you. If I ever want to go up to my children's school and have a word, let's call it have a word with somebody if they bothering. So thank you, friend. Thank you so very much. So we have history, yes, we know that, but I want to one of the things that we have not had time to talk about or delve into is your younger years. Like now we are, you know, business women, entrepreneurs, and an entrepreneurial household with our entrepreneurial husband. But husbands, we don't share husbands.

SPEAKER_00 8:05

Right. Girl, you better go ahead and make it clear.

SPEAKER_03 8:08

There's only one person in our kids. And that's us.

SPEAKER_00 8:11

Because you know, people be ready. Girl, they share hugs.

SPEAKER_02 8:15

Yeah, we have to get we have to get all of Rita's phrases out of the house.

SPEAKER_03 8:18

Yes, yes, over the years that have me hollering. But honestly, when you were a young girl, like what did you envision for yourself? Honestly and truly, like what did you wish or say, oh God, I'm gonna grow up to be what?

SPEAKER_00 8:35

I really didn't have like a vision for myself because you know, I guess growing up in well, in our generation, we mostly just did what we were told. So, you know, but I'm talking about like, you know, for my parents, you know, I grew up in a very Christian, conservative household, you know, um, two stable parents. Um, but I I never like had vision boards or different things like that. I was just going with whatever was introduced to me, introduced to me. Like I went to um school. Um, but one thing I can say that my parents gave me a balance, so that's a great thing. But I was always in church. Right. But I had a balance. It just wasn't church, church. It was I I was able to do things at school, but I was able to do things at church. Now, I was not a I could not do anything on Sunday morning, though. On Sunday morning, we all went to church, okay? But it was really like I just had a balance, and I believe when I began to discover more about myself was when I left my parents' home and went to college. Okay. And then I was able to see other things and be exposed to other things and then say, you know what? That may not be bad right there. That may not be bad right there, but I always had um a burden or I would say a desire inside of me to push people. To push people.

SPEAKER_03 10:00

So I know in college you did that with your community choir. So tell me how that got started.

SPEAKER_00 10:05

Well, when I left college, I started a community choir. And I got a group of people, and I was like, hey, you want to sing? And they said, okay, and we started it, and then other people started coming, but it just wasn't a community choir, it was a family. Oh, yeah. We became family. Through that community choir, um, they eventually somebody from there introduced me to my husband now.

SPEAKER_03 10:32

Oh, see, and I was a won't he do it.

SPEAKER_00 10:36

Yeah, a friend of a friend introduced me, and you know, we were just one big happy family, um, very uh involved in each other's lives and to accountability. Accountability. It's good to have people around you that's for you, but want to see you succeed. And a lot of those people I'm still connected to today.

SPEAKER_03 10:57

Wow. So even informing that, were you always or musically inclined, like uh playing instruments or singing or anything? Because what made you say a community choir? Like, I'm not gonna ready to start a community choir. As much as I love community and I like people, um Come on, Rue, start run.

SPEAKER_00 11:16

No, no, well, you know, when I was 11, um, I had a youth leader at that time, her name was Nanette Johnson. And she put me up in front of a choir and just said direct. And I had never directed before. Um now, and I just started doing it, doing it, and something was there and just became really natural. Now, when it becomes to um instruments, I was um, I grew up playing the piano. You know, my mom had me in piano lessons for a very long time.

SPEAKER_03 11:48

Um that's definitely part of our generation because everybody played the piano.

SPEAKER_00 11:52

Everybody, we had a piano in our house too. Everybody play the piano, and I'm not the best singer at all. Like, I would not get up and like be like, okay, I'm gonna sing a solo. You'll be like, maybe that's all right. Wait, wait a minute. That's how you know that you're struggling in church because the person gonna be like, I'm all right, nah. I'm a baby, that's all right, nah.

SPEAKER_02 12:14

It's not what you gotta read, not expecting.

SPEAKER_00 12:18

Exactly. That's what it's all about. But I wouldn't, but but playing the piano helped me to hold a note and teach parts. Right. So I was able to do that and read music. Right. So I can read music. So through all of that, that's how it came for me to establish my own.

SPEAKER_03 12:35

Okay. Speaking of establishing your own, we're gonna hit here and come back, bounce all around it. Okay. But Farita May's ministry.

SPEAKER_00 12:44

Yes!

SPEAKER_03 12:45

I knew that was gonna, I want to get into that real fast. Like, how do you feel that God has prepared you now to begin a ministry for women like this?

SPEAKER_00 12:56

Oh my goodness. One thing about being in ministry and being in business, um, a lot of things I feel like I had to learn the hard way. Not saying I didn't have that support system, I'm not saying that, but I didn't have the tools. And I had to do a lot of searching for those tools, going out there. And if I can help other women get those tools, and so they don't have to search, so they don't have to do certain things or whatever, then that is what Farita May's ministry is about. It's about um helping women in ministry and helping women in business because Ruth, you're in both. Right, you know, a lot of times, you know, women may not have that safe place, right? Or they may be in a place where they have to suppress who they really are. Come on, somebody to make everybody else feel comfortable. And so this is gonna be a place where they are free to be exactly who God has called them to be and to walk in your calling and know that it's okay. It is okay to be a powerful woman. That is okay. It doesn't mean that you are trying to control, it doesn't mean any of those things. It means that that's the way that God made you. And he made you like that for a reason, and when you can embrace that, then you can really come in tune with who God wants you to be.

SPEAKER_03 14:25

Speaking of which, you lead so well publicly, but how do you allow God to lead you privately? What is your private time like?

SPEAKER_00 14:35

Girl, praying. I have to pray. Morning, afternoon. Ruth was right here. She said, I have a phone that dings and reminds me. Okay, it's prayer time. Um, no, I'm serious. Like, I always have to pray. Um, I always have to remind myself of things. And I'm always aware. You have to be aware of yourself, you know. Um, and I spend time with the Lord. I do, I spend a lot of time with God, fasting, most definitely, praying. That is very important. Um and that's that because I deal with so many people.

SPEAKER_03 15:12

Well, of course, you have to, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 15:15

So that's how I'm able to, you know, make it through that.

SPEAKER_03 15:18

Honey, your husband said something, and he was quoting Bishop, but he said something Sunday, I believe. He said that Bishop told him, do not stop praying, don't get up until you're weeping, until you're crying. And that did something to me, and I'm like, my God, that's the truth. Until you have a burden of souls and other people on you, because he I'm pretty sure he wasn't saying weeping for yourself. Like, no. Right. But when you're weeping and you have poured out all you have got to give, and now you're at the point of just weeping and moaning and groaning, where only Holy Spirit can definitely intercede, honey. I was like, that's true. You know what? I usually start with crying, but that's because I'm so expended, like I'm just so tired that I'm crying. But instead of communing with God and just allowing him to speak and be still and be quiet. So, in your quiet moments, how can you say um or talk about a time when God has actually challenged or stretched your faith the most?

SPEAKER_00 16:23

Ooh, he stretched my faith a lot. I mean, I think too, just stepping into a new season that my husband and I are in, right, that really stretches our faith. Um, being um my husband being elevated as a senior pastor, and I'm being elevated as a what society likes to say, a first lady. Right, right. I'll say that. And, you know, my faith, of course, it it was it was it was stretched with a number of things because now um it's not just your household you're concerned about, and we never really were because we were youth pastors, but now it's it's souls, it's burdens, it's people. So we have to stay in prayer. And a lot of times the closet is my prayer time. Oh, I'm not sure. You know, I have a closet. I have a big closet with this one, but it still is the prayer time where I am able to just sit quietly and um just really just say it's me and God. Because when you do that, you feel better.

SPEAKER_03 17:24

Most bad.

SPEAKER_00 17:25

You know, when you come out of that secret place, yeah, you feel much better. Yeah, that's a peace. It's a peace. That's right. And sometimes we're just so going, going, going. I have to do this, I have to do this, I have to do that, and we're looking for the next self-help thing, and all of those things are good, but sometimes we just have to stop and just say, Lord, what are you saying to me? Right. And I guarantee you, if you do that, you will hear the Lord speak to you. I've done it plenty of times. I've heard him speak.

SPEAKER_03 17:56

Oh, yes, honey. Okay, you she stopped like, I'm gonna save that for a message. I already know her. Yes. I already know how to do it.

SPEAKER_00 18:04

You know, exactly.

SPEAKER_03 18:06

Okay, so what is your prayer, friend, for women who walk through Farita Amay's ministries? What's your prayer for them?

SPEAKER_00 18:14

Oh man, I want them because something that me and Garland both believe is that when a person comes into your presence, they should leave differently. Most definitely. And when I mean like that, I mean on a positive note.

SPEAKER_04 18:27

That's right.

SPEAKER_00 18:27

Not like you ever so you come around somebody and you just leave like, oh, I don't feel right. Unfortunately. I don't want that. When they come in, when they come into Farita May's ministry, I want them to leave knowing number one, who they are in God. Amen. Knowing why were you created and embracing it and knowing that it's okay. Knowing that it's okay to be authentically you. Because when you try to be somebody else, you're gonna be frustrated, right? You're gonna be depressed, right? You're gonna be jealous because somebody doing something that you want to do. But when you embrace who God wants you to be, He's a He will start sending things your way. He will start sending people your way. Why? Because think about it, Ruth. He created you to be something. So when you begin to walk in that, my God. Of course it's gonna work. I know it because you're walking in what you were created to be.

SPEAKER_03 19:28

Amen. Yeah, and it's so funny. I'm looking at you and listening, and I know so many people are like, yes, oh my God. Oh, I just love this. But again, our friendship and relationship go back almost 20 years. Yeah, and before it was all about pouring into youth so much that I say something about an adult, and you like, I don't know adults. I did not know adults would crack up. I'm like, you don't know the adults. You're like, no, my focus are the children, and if they don't have any youth, then I don't know who they are. How would I know them? You were like, my entire time is spilled building these children up, and if their parents come around, then that's how I get to know them. But other than that, and now it hasn't switched because you still pour into the babies, but now, even now, it's like, okay, my focus is now on y'all mothers because I've learned that if I can help the women, then they can it will affect their household and everything. So it's just totally different to hear us talk now with the adults and grown women. You have you've affected so many lives, first through business and even your walk with that, because you inserted yourself into business. We even got to know each other on that level of being business partners and working in business together. But you've always been so adamant about if this isn't gonna work, like you are always definite. I'm gonna give it a timeline, and if it doesn't do what it's supposed to do, then I'm gonna move on. I'm just like, okay, do you? Like I didn't expect anything less or anything more. So going back to your childhood, you were born and raised an only child. Not just an only child, but an only girl. So only girl, you know, us females can be all types of ways. We have hormones that are, I mean, we got this too, but we just have to be a little bit different. So, how did you embrace not just stepping into marriage, but marrying somebody who already has a child and everything? Like you said, I didn't necessarily envision my life one way or another, but you all had met, got together, broke up, he went into the service, all these things, you could go and just listen to any of the messages at the Lighthouse Church of All Nations website. Right. So we know all those stories, but how did you feel as a young lady? Like you gonna take me out of my mom and daddy. House where I don't pretty much want for anything. And do what with me, sir. Like, what was that like?

SPEAKER_00 22:06

Well, you know, when I first met my husband, Garland, I think we were 20. He wasn't ready. He wasn't, he wasn't. That ain't what the Lord said. So, no, make sure you hear from the Lord. Because don't be trying to get into something talking about well, they gonna get better. Uh-uh. He wasn't, he wasn't ready. He wasn't ready. So I was in college, we met, and then he had to go to the military. He had to he had to get some things together, and he got those things together in the military. So when he returned, it was a different person. And what always attracted, well, I've been attracted. Well, no, let me say this, Mama Lee, my mama, who we call Mama Lee.

SPEAKER_03 22:45

Right.

SPEAKER_00 22:47

My husband, Garland, is a provider. You know, he's a natural provider. He provides. And I was like, he came back, he had that job. I'm not going to even tell a story. Right. And I was just like, oh, you got you a good job. You know, you know what I'm saying? But it was only one thing. He was struggling with his relationship with the Lord. So I had to tell him, yes, you do have this good job, but you got to get your life together. You know, because a lot of times, Ruth, you know, women, when we meet guys, sometimes we focusing on the wrong thing. You know, we're focusing on, well, what sign are you and what this say or whatever. No, honey, does he know the Lord? That needs to be the question that you ask. Do you know the Lord? So Garland was struggling. So what he did, he started coming to church. He was coming to church because I was coming to church. And but during that time, he had a situation to come up. And from that situation that he experienced, from that day forth, he began to walk with the Lord Jesus Christ. And he began to change. And been changing ever since. And when he came into my life, he had a um a son, um, DJ. And DJ was six months. And it never dawned on us that that Garland had a son or it was a big thing. I remember my mom telling me, she was like, he has a son, but we seen how Garland took care of his son. And my mom said, Farita, if he takes care of his son like that, he's gonna take care of you, and he's gonna take care of your children. And sometimes we just need to go back and listen to our mothers. Our mothers are a prophet. Okay, right there. So at first I wasn't seeing everything, but then I began to see, and Garland began to change, and then one thing led to another. He proposed, and here we are 24 years later. We have three sons.

SPEAKER_03 24:48

Yes, and a grandbaby on the water.

SPEAKER_00 24:50

And a grandbaby on the way.

SPEAKER_03 24:52

I we didn't even talk about that. Now we're also family. Yes. Exactly. Straight crazy.

SPEAKER_00 24:59

Because my son married your niece.

SPEAKER_03 25:02

Yes, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 25:03

And now they have a baby coming. Right.

SPEAKER_03 25:05

Now my niece is amazed.

SPEAKER_00 25:06

Yes, exactly. Yes, her niece. Yeah. When you think about it.

SPEAKER_03 25:10

That's so crazy. God knows what he's doing. Your grandson is going to be my nephew. Yeah. Second nephew. Right. Yeah. So that's it. Isn't that something? God knows what he's doing. Always. Always. Oh my God, always. So as a mother of three boys and a wife, you and now having a grandson. It's just me and me, mean everywhere. How do you protect your womanhood up in this family of men? Because, honey, look, I would have a whole nother house.

SPEAKER_00 25:40

Well, you know, a lot of times too, I can say being the uh the only woman, a lot of times I do get spoiled because, you know, being the only woman in the house. Because if you let Garland say, he'd be like, Friday, you get everything that you want or whatever. But also too, it just gave me another insight on men that I'm able to help women out a lot. Oh my god. Because I'll be like, let me tell you what they really talking about, girlfriend. Let me tell you what what they really mean.

SPEAKER_02 26:10

You gonna write the alternative book to Steve Harvey.

SPEAKER_00 26:12

Exactly. Exactly. Because I know because I've been I was the only female in the house. So I've gotten insight about a lot of things dealing with men. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 26:27

Oh my God. Yes. So what does speaking of which motherhood actually uh give you or show you about your purpose also in ministry?

SPEAKER_00 26:39

Um, being a mother for me, especially I could say, especially when I was the uh working with so many youth, um it was a reminder of we are placed here on earth, but we are also placed here to give back to the next generation. My mom instilled that in me. And the way that she instilled that in me, I my mom started um college funds for her grandkids. You know, a lot of times, sometimes as parents, we get so consumed about what we want, and we never reach back. Sometimes we say, Well, I didn't have it, so my child not gonna have it, or we think everybody got the struggle because we struggle, and that's not necessarily true. So being a mom taught me that I um am here as a mother, but I also have a responsibility to reach back as well. I have a responsibility to my kids and show them a way and steward them in the right direction.

SPEAKER_03 27:38

My God. So I don't know if you've had an opportunity to watch yet, but I had a conversation with Mackenzie. Okay, and um we recorded it. And some things were brought up and came up in our conversation. And I want to know as you since you pretty much we took the same route around the same time and everything. So, how do you show up emotionally as well as spiritually for your children before you even go outside the house?

SPEAKER_00 28:07

Uh, how do I show up? I have to listen. I have to sit and listen. Now, I was taught that being a mother. That wasn't something I knew. Because I can l think about DJ. DJ, that first child, it was just like, well, just do as I say. Right. You know, Gabe was just like, oh, you really better do what I say. But but somewhere up in there between Gabe and Isaiah, I'm I'm I'm getting to the point, and it's still a struggle a lot, that I have to stop and listen. And and I have to hear what they have to say. And I have to be alright with what they're saying and still steward them in the right direction. Because I grew up where it wasn't an opinion. Oh, we didn't have opinions. You just did what you were pretty much told. And you trusted that your parents will lead you in the right direction. But sometimes I have to stop and listen to what they're saying, or how are you trying to communicate? That has been a big factor that we have been working on a lot is communication because everybody communicates different. We don't communicate the same, everybody is different. So you have to tell me what do you need from me, and then I tell you what I need from you. And that's very important in relationships, but especially in relationships dealing with our children. We don't even sit there. And then when we do something wrong or we disappoint our children, we have to say, I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_03 29:38

Oh God, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:38

And have changed behavior from that. And likewise, kids too, but especially parents, because once again, in our generation, parents didn't say they were sorry too much. You know, they'll be like the way that they apologize was like, girl, you want some chicken? Like, I got you those shoes on that. Exactly, exactly. They didn't ever say, they didn't ever say, I'm sorry, that wasn't my intent, or I would never hurt you, or just explaining it more. Kids really do need that, most definitely.

SPEAKER_03 30:11

So walking in your purpose as a wife, as a mother, first lady, and now leading a woman's ministry, how do you stay focused with all those hats? Like with all those doors, you know, that may fly open at the same time. How do you stay focused when your platform may change and your title may change? I was just listening to a message um Stephen Furtick preached about being called and your name um being who you are, but you could be multiple things to different people, but yet you're still one and the same. How do you, especially just staying standing in a swarm of people? Like it could be Pastor Garland calling you, it could be Isaiah calling you, it could be a church member calling you, it could be your parents calling you. All of those people will be in the room at the same time. Me or another friend in the room, and how do you just go, oh my God, stop? Everybody just be still and be quiet. Because as women, we kind of think we need to respond to everybody all the time. But how do you stay focused and honed in on, okay, I'm only one person, I can only do one thing at a time. What have you started to practice? Because we all need that answer.

SPEAKER_00 31:27

Well, and one of the big things is that I prioritize, and I think that's and Ruth, you've known me for a while. My family is my first priority.

SPEAKER_04 31:38

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 31:38

I've said that publicly, and that's what I believe in. My family is my first priority, so I prioritize in that way. Um, with because I'm a wife first.

SPEAKER_04 31:49

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 31:50

Then I'm a mother. Daughter.

SPEAKER_03 31:53

Right.

SPEAKER_00 31:53

Okay, so it's being my family. Um, another thing, Ruth, that I had to learn that I had to learn this. I don't do everything. I think that's one thing as women, we feel like we have to take every engagement, um, be that yes person, trying to please everybody. You don't have to do that. And if you feel that you have to do that, it's a more of a deep-rooted issue. Or while we feel that we have to please everybody or we're not gonna have value if we don't do that. Some things you have to say no. And so what I do is that I prioritize, and plus, I have to have that calendar out too, as well. Of course, and we learn that from business. But also, I have to say, do I need to do this? Is this something that I need to do? And I've learned the word no. N-O. I cannot do everything, I cannot go everywhere. And if people or someone wants to take offense, it's nothing we can do about that. Because even if you do everything, people still gonna take offense.

SPEAKER_03 32:54

I promise you, they're gonna still find something wrong.

SPEAKER_00 32:56

But you have to still take care of yourself and who you are. Because the Lord didn't call us to be a sacrificial lamb to everybody. Okay, that's not what he called us for. Because we have to take out that time for ourselves as well and our family and others. Because you know, girl, if something happened to you, life's gonna keep going. Somebody's gonna be in your kitchen, and somebody will definitely be in your kitchen. Amen.

unknown 33:23

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_00 33:24

Am I right about it? You're right about it. Okay, then come on, somebody. Am I right about it, Jacob? Uh-huh. I know I'm right about it.

SPEAKER_03 33:31

I love it. She is now talking to the engineer. Yes, I am. Okay. So also, friend, speaking of things that, because you know, again, we don't have these hard times. We have, but have you ever thought that you have been guilty of imposter syndrome? Have you ever, because I can honestly say I have, I'm like, you know what, the gig is gonna be up. People, I think people think highly of me than I really, really am. Have you ever thought that you've been held on such a pedestal that one day they're gonna look at you and be like, I knew it. That's not who she really is.

SPEAKER_00 34:08

I don't think I've ever been guilty of imposture syndrome. Now, I do believe people do hold people on a pedestal by their choice, but not by our choice. Like I've always, if you know me now, Ruth, I've always tried to be authentic with people and be myself with people and talk about right and talk about struggles openly. Like we don't have it all together. And you should not hold anybody up on a pedestal because that's total idolatry. And nobody should not let you hold them on a pedestal. Don't hold me on a pedestal because you're gonna be disappointed. I am not perfect by no means, and I've never like tried to portray like I was perfect, and so I can't really say that I had a syndrome where I was just like, oh, everything is just in la la land. No, it's not. You know, I've preached from it from the pulpit. I talked about financial struggles, I talked about when the repo guy was there, I've talked about marriage issues, I've talked about things with my children. I've put it all out there because we need more people to put it out there so people can know that they have hope.

SPEAKER_03 35:22

Amen. Amen. What would you tell um pretty much? I this is a funny question because of what you had us do recently when we got together and we wrote letters to our future self. Okay, okay, okay. In that, what are you looking forward to telling your future self about an experience that you haven't had yet? Some type of growth and stretching. What are you looking forward to the most?

SPEAKER_00 35:52

I don't know, Ruth. You be asking these deep questions that I got to think about it.

SPEAKER_03 35:56

Your husband is deep.

SPEAKER_00 35:58

Girl.

SPEAKER_03 35:58

Come on.

SPEAKER_00 35:59

That's why I be like, girl, okay, whatever. Oh, deep people.

SPEAKER_03 36:05

Yeah, we don't know. I don't know, Ruth.

SPEAKER_00 36:08

Girl, good job. You, yeah. I mean, you stay steady, stay consistent, stay on the right path, stay on the right road.

SPEAKER_03 36:19

Right.

SPEAKER_00 36:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 36:21

Because one thing about you, no matter what, you will obtain something that you like, okay, because the next one is gonna be even. And I'm like, my God, girl. Oh, yeah. Are you serious?

SPEAKER_00 36:32

I've learned how to be content. Yes. Okay, it's okay to be content. But that doesn't mean that God doesn't want more in certain areas. Now, I but I think you have to have a balance. Right. Because some people, you know, we just keep going and going and going and going. But but God wants you to have more. You know, so yeah, I'll be on to the next thing in a minute.

SPEAKER_03 36:52

Oh, yes.

SPEAKER_00 36:53

And just a second.

SPEAKER_03 36:55

I promise you, you will be and you have. Yes. Definitely. And that's one of the things also that I admire so much about you is that you don't. You don't rest and say, All right, girl, we content. Let's when we're gonna go lay up on the island, there's nothing else to do. No, it is always more. We're always moving and always helping somebody else. Like, there's never a time we're having a conversation that you're not sharing something you've learned and how you're about to spread it, and how you're about to. I remember your first conversations about Farita May's ministries and everything, and I was just like, wow, she is really doing this. This is really happening. A lot of people would just be content to stand next to their husband and just be like, you know, all right. Oh, girl, no. Thinking that that position is them standing there and not serving and doing work. But you have been a servant leader ever since I've known you. Like, even through the pregnancy of I of Isaiah. And I'm bringing that up for a reason because she had the nerve to tell me all the time, oh girl, you make beautiful children. You should have some more. She kept saying that until the Lord blessed her woman.

SPEAKER_02 38:05

I was cracking up when she saw me she was pregnant. I was like, see, that's why I don't put my mouth on people.

SPEAKER_03 38:13

She stopped saying that though, too. Right. She did not say that. Oh no, I don't say that no more. You didn't say it anymore. So, friend, we are at the juncture in our not just relationship, but the juncture even in our walking in our purpose, as you've always said, and using our strengths to glorify God and to help other people. But in addition to Farita May's ministry, I know it's so much more. What do you want to share to that woman that may be lying in bed thinking, I can never do that, and that's not me. Oh, that's they were born to do that. Like, I know if you could hold up a picture of yourself, you know, yesteryear, back when you were like, I'm just waiting for the Lord to reveal the next, like for him to tell me. Because that's what it is. We learn as we go. If you're not going anywhere, then how's God gonna show you something?

SPEAKER_00 39:12

Right.

SPEAKER_03 39:13

Everybody he told to do something, he told them, I'm gonna show you a place. I need you to get up and go. So, what do you want to say to the listeners and to the women that you know are struggling with actually getting up?

SPEAKER_00 39:29

You have to get up. You because the reason why the woman can't get up because she doesn't have confidence. But what we have to remember that confidence is built in action. Amen. And so the enemy tries to tell us all the time that you need to have this, you had to do this, you had to do this, you had to do this, have this in place before you make this move. That is not true. If you begin to get up, God will send you what you need. This phrase right here, everybody always says, Well, I'm just waiting on the Lord, waiting on him to do what? No, he created you to do something, so the time is now to do it and and and do it, do it, do it scared. It doesn't matter, but just do it because time is gonna keep ticking. And you know, Ruth, one thing that I've learned from from talking to so many people who have looked back over their life, you don't want to look over your life and say, I wish. I definitely or I should have, or why didn't I? The time is now. The whatever God has called you to do, the time is now to do it. Stop waiting on people to validate what you already know.

SPEAKER_03 40:37

And even if they don't, still do it. Still do it. Like, I appreciate you all for watching, I appreciate you for subscribing, please do. I forgot to mention. Subscribe, like, and share. But those who do do, and those who don't, won't. And I'm okay with it because I'm doing what God asked me to do. As a matter of fact, told me to do in an audible voice. But uh, you all have a podcast, you have Farita Maze Ministries. What else, how else can people get in contact with you? What other how can they call you for speaking engagements, all that good stuff?

SPEAKER_00 41:13

Really just going to the Facebook page of the for Farita Maze Ministries because the website is being worked on. Okay. But just really just going there and then they can message, and we have somebody that's over that or whatever. Okay. And so that's how if somebody wants to, you know, get in contact, because people get in contact with me all the time, believe it. Um, and so that is the and then plus we're gonna be releasing um soon. We're about to have a newsletter that's gonna be going out that people will be able to subscribe to. Um, our YouTube channels are up. Um, they've been up for quite some time. Without the head um uh for Rita Mays and then Garland Mays, so pretty much, and we have uh a podcast that's on there as well that was about relationships. That was our first uh podcast that did really, really well, season one of Troubleshooting. Um, but yeah, that's that's about it.

SPEAKER_03 42:03

Okay, marvelous. So please follow, please subscribe to all of their channels as well to stay in contact to see what's going on new. I know I'm looking forward to seeing and to having a conversation with her once again as the ministry goes one day. Like, oh yeah, being a good one.

SPEAKER_00 42:21

We're gonna have a building next time I come. We're gonna have a building, a building, a place that women can come to and learn. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 42:31

So my final um, not necessarily even question, but um, my final impartation is I definitely declare and decree that everything, everything that you have um laid up and labored for and expecting for other people, God gives back to you a thousandfold. Like honestly and truly. I pray that you have not even seen and even imagined everything that God is gonna do through you and for you because of your faithfulness, mostly your faithfulness. Because all the that time serving and ministrying with the youth and everything, you all didn't get paid for. I I can't, I don't know like leaders who do that in their household. You sacrificed so much. Your children were brought along, and I pray they, of course, prospered from it as well. Because seeing you work in ministry, they're working in ministry now too. But it's things like that that we don't see every day. You hear a lot of people complaining about people in church and in ministry and they not doing it right. Well, if they're not doing it right, then you do something about it. That's one of the things that I've always learned. Right. If you're gonna talk about it, and then you do something about it. But uh you told me so many years ago bring my children to the lighthouse church so your children can get active in ministry and they Did and have been, and I'm just grateful because of our relationship, because I allowed you to actually mentor me and walk me through some things and still do because that's another thing that we as women have to do. We have to attach ourselves to someone who actually wants better for us. A lot of us attach ourselves to people that keep talking about us and talking down to us. And then you wonder why you aren't growing.

SPEAKER_00 44:27

Come on, somebody.

SPEAKER_03 44:28

I'm just saying, like your connections matter. That's true. Your connections matter so very much. So I appreciate everything you are doing, everything you've done. And girl, we're gonna keep riding this out together.

SPEAKER_00 44:44

Now make sure you subscribe to be serene, okay? Just becoming serene. Becoming serene. Look at look at your cup. Yeah, I got a cup. Look, see, I got a cup right here. Y'all want you see it, Jacob? Yes, I got a cup, I got a goodie bag, I got so much stuff they fed me. You know, you go some places, they don't do nothing for you. So you make sure that you subscribe because when you get your stuff, you want people to subscribe to your stuff. And we want to support this young lady. Amen. Amen. No, I'm not gonna fuss, but we love you for watching. Amen. And you subscribe and tell your friends to subscribe. I'm for real, because we subscribe to mess all the time. But this is something positive. This is something that's uplifting women, and everybody needs to know about this channel. So subscribe and share. Now, amen.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

The mama lee coming out. You got that, Jacob?

SPEAKER_00 45:46

Don't you take that out. You keep that right there, son. All right.

SPEAKER_02 45:50

Thank you all so very much for joining us again for another episode. And we look forward to you.

SPEAKER_03 45:58

Oh my God. We look forward to you joining us once again. And if you've liked what you've heard and seen, do not forget, once again, to subscribe, like, and share. And hit that notification bell so that you will be notified when new episodes are coming up. Thank you so much again, friend. I love you. There's nothing you can do about it. Until next time. Bye bye. Say bye bye. Bye bye.

SPEAKER_00 46:24

Subscribe. Bye bye.