More Than Values: What Should Parents Leave Behind?

A conversation on whether parents should pass down more than values, exploring the role of financial inheritance and what it means for family legacy.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

Hello, everyone, and welcome to FAMology. We're John and Amy Clausen, and it's our privilege to come uh to you again this week and share our hearts with you about our favorite topic, which is family, uh marriage, parenting, all the things that are involved in our everyday life. So we uh missed last week. Do you realize that we just missed completely?

SPEAKER_03 0:29

Yes, we did miss.

SPEAKER_02 0:30

We were just uh doing a lot of things in our lives, uh, as we have shared before. Um I am wrong.

SPEAKER_03 0:36

That had nothing to do with it.

SPEAKER_02 0:38

What had nothing to do with it?

SPEAKER_03 0:39

Well, I mean, life was very, very full last week, but I had no voice.

SPEAKER_02 0:44

Well, there was that.

SPEAKER_03 0:45

I mean, like, I was whispering last week when we were getting ready to record this. That's true. And it was coming out like this.

SPEAKER_02 0:52

So I would have been going solo, which is not a great idea for FAMOLogy for me to go solo. Um, so yeah, I kind of need you next to me on most of these questions.

SPEAKER_03 1:00

My voice is mostly back today.

SPEAKER_02 1:02

But yeah, she literally would have been completely silent. We would have we would have had to like dub dub your voice in later. Yeah, and you could have just lip.

SPEAKER_03 1:09

A voiceover. That would have been exciting.

SPEAKER_02 1:11

Yeah, it would have been exciting. You could have done it, you could have pulled it off. But but we did have a few other things going on in our lives. We did celebrate my dad's uh passing uh early in the week, which was great. Uh, we had just family there, able to share our hearts with uh with everybody about him, yeah and not only about his life, but the things that he cared about in his life, which is super cool. And uh so he was honored, and um, I think uh everybody left really knowing what an incredible man he was. Yeah, um, and not only that, but I think that his life message was conveyed through it as well. So people I think left with something um that they could have forever from him, which is what everybody wants, right? Yes, legacy.

SPEAKER_03 1:51

I know he enjoyed the service.

SPEAKER_02 1:53

Yes, yes. My dad was a very funny man, I mean, literally hilarious.

SPEAKER_03 1:57

A very funny man.

SPEAKER_02 1:58

And you know, had one-liners and quips for every little thing, you know. And um, yeah, I think even my brother said it's quite possible that my dad invented dad jokes. It's possible we can't prove it otherwise. Um, so he was doing dad jokes before it was fashionable.

SPEAKER_01 2:12

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_02 2:13

I don't know if dad jokes are fashionable now, but they just are.

SPEAKER_03 2:16

There's a whole lot of one-liners that we can all just say because Papa always said them.

SPEAKER_02 2:21

And they're they're his. So and they're gonna live because you know, even though we all rolled our eyes as kids, we all still say them. Yes, of course. And so they're gonna live on forever for sure. Uh, which kind of leads us into our question today, which is kind of kind of precious in a lot of ways, um, because the question is um, should, if possible, a parent pass on more than just an inheritance of values, um, i.e., monetary inheritance. Um, and so the question is, what should parents leave behind? And so this is a great tribute to my father who left behind quite a bit. Um, more more than just values, although that's probably our greatest gift from him, um, for sure. Uh, but there was other things as well, and uh so we can kind of talk about that.

SPEAKER_03 3:04

Yeah. And I think I think as a whole, you know, there's a great value placed on money.

SPEAKER_02 3:12

Yes.

SPEAKER_03 3:13

Um, and and it's you know, we can't love money, but money is not evil. I think that's an important distinction. Yeah. And so passing on a uh monetary inheritance to your children is a good and worthy goal.

SPEAKER_02 3:27

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 3:27

Would you agree with that?

SPEAKER_02 3:28

I do. I you know, this is kind of a funny analogy. So I was thinking of Kirk Cousins of all things.

SPEAKER_03 3:34

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 3:34

So those of you who don't know who Kirk Cousins was or is, um, he's a quarterback in the NFL and was the quarterback for the Vikings for quite a while. Well, there was a Isn't he still?

SPEAKER_03 3:43

He is. Is he still? Yeah, I mean he's not not for us. No. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 3:46

Um, and you know, we were contemplating whether we were going to re-sign him, and of course, he was demanding an incredible amount of money. Um, and so they asked him, like, would you be willing to stay in Minnesota kind of for less? Yeah. I think it's kind of the point that they were trying to make. Like, if we couldn't afford you, do you love us so much? Right. It's such a Minnesota thing. Do you love us so much that you would make you know that sacrifice? And I remember him saying something to the effect of it's not really about the money, it's about what the money represents. Which is kind of funny. Which is basically what he's saying is I want to get paid a lot of money because I want you to value you know what I mean, which is sort of an interesting deal. Um, so in other words, you can't really afford me, is what he was trying to say. But I think it's interesting because you know, when we talk about money and money inheritance, it's never really about the money, but it's about thinking generationally. And I think there is value in that because um money is often used throughout scripture, in my opinion, as sort of an analogy of life in a lot of ways, because it's not the most important thing, right? It's not it's not the central thing, and yet it's the way that we treat it, the way that we handle it is really the key.

SPEAKER_01 4:55

Right.

SPEAKER_02 4:55

It's about our heart, it's always about our heart. Yeah, and so if our heart is to leave an inheritance for our children because we have value for that, well, then I think it does, it's what the money represents.

SPEAKER_01 5:05

Yeah.

unknown 5:06

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 5:06

All like Kirk Cousins. Does that make sense? Yeah. Um, and so I think there's value in that. The money itself obviously has value too. I mean, we want our children to inherit something so they can live more comfortably. All those things are fine. Um, but at the end of the day, it's not about being wealthy or having money, it's about thinking generationally. Yeah. Do you agree with that?

SPEAKER_03 5:26

Yeah. And I think too, and it uh living more comfortably, yeah, but it's about each of us having our opportunity to decide where we steward the kingdom of God. Yeah. Because there's an enormous kingdom, and all facets of it have to be stewarded. And each one of us carries a unique portion of who God is, and He has made different portions alive inside of every one of us. And so our inheritance, there's things that we are passionate about for the kingdom of God, and our children are gonna carry multifaceted perspectives on that, and their inheritance then is gonna is going to expand um where they choose to fund the kingdom of God, the things that are important to them that may be a little different than the portions that are on our heart. And I think that actually brings a multiplication of inheritance.

SPEAKER_01 6:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 6:21

And so, yes, I want our children and our grandchildren to have, you know, some of those comforts in life, yes. But I also want them to be able to steward the kingdom of God and in through some of those finances in a way that would be unique to them.

SPEAKER_02 6:37

I think that's really good. I think it's really all about the kingdom, really. Yeah, and and so, you know, sewing into that next generation financially has value when we're have a kingdom mindset. I don't think we can deny that.

SPEAKER_01 6:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 6:49

Um, that that that money has a role in that. But again, I think it's it's really the issue of of my heart towards my children. And and again, it doesn't necessarily obviously it has nothing to do with the size of the inheritance. Um, it has to do with the fact that I'm thinking about them enough that I'm willing to make even some sacrifices on this side of heaven in order to set them up or help them financially. And I think that is a worthy goal. Yeah, um, I think, I think uh maybe this you can correct me if I'm wrong about this. I'm just this is a podcast, I can say these things, I think. Wow, that's well I'm I'm not I'm not so sure that this generation values that as much as previous generations. That's a pretty big statement, and so forgive me. Um, but but the the notion of setting things aside for some other day, and I think a great example of that is how our government has mishandled money and and has has come been completely okay with running up a debt for future generations for some kind of temporary um understanding or applause here in the present. Right. Um, it's a it's a complete different mindset shift. And and I I would like this next generation to also live generationally so that they're thinking about that.

SPEAKER_01 8:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 8:05

Um I'll just give you my own testimony in this question that I I feel I put a lot of value on inheritance. You my wife can testify to that. That's something that as we've been planning our finances and retirement and different things that way, I've emphasized that tremendously to the point of it's been hard for me to sometimes be obedient to God's voice because I'm looking at the numbers, like this is my goal. I feel like I I wanted to save this much for my children. And so, you know, clearly the Lord will continue to offer this to me three years from now, four years from now, when when I'm ready to actually obey you know what I mean? And and it's interesting because our journey, as many of you know, over the last two or three years has not allowed that. No, it all came to not an abrupt end, but uh an incredibly fast transition into something completely different. Um, and on a side note, I did I did get the Republican uh endorsement for uh running for House of Representatives, which really helps me in this um phase. So I just want to fill you in because people might be following the politics. Um so the the the that was a very big step towards me becoming um the representative for our district, and so it's not obviously settled until election day. Yeah. Um however um November third. There's a lot of wind behind my sails now for that. So anyway, so thank you for praying and and being involved in that. Um but but again, it's it's about it's about listening to the voice of the Lord, always.

SPEAKER_03 9:28

Yeah. But then that's the monetary side of inheritance, but then the side of inheritance where it's more than just an inheritance of values, and just is such an interesting word because it it almost is a limiting word. Yeah, and I kind of want to take that word out, you know, because an inheritance of values is of supreme worth. Because I think about my father-in-law, who is one of the most extraordinary men I have ever met, and that's not just words, that's that's truth. Yeah, he was a man that loved the Lord with all of his heart, who loved his family with equal passion, who loved his wife for 65 years and treasured her till the day he died. And she was his first and primary thought and priority, and it was it was beautiful to witness. It was an honor to have front row seats to Papa's life. Yeah. And I think about the value of the inheritance in the spirit that our family received from him, yeah, and it's enormous. Yeah, it's an enormous inheritance, and and feeling that um the responsibility of being one of papa's kids, yeah, and and knowing that we get to steward what he, you know, that it's in our generation now to steward what he stewarded so well has tremendous worth to me. And I see it resting on his grandchildren and on his children and uh visible anointing, and it's it's it's astonishing to me. And it will change the kingdom of God. I'm just saying what our family has received from Papa changed our life forever.

SPEAKER_02 11:13

Yeah, I don't think I don't think the river flows both ways. I I think that um if if you received the fullness of the values that someone like my papa gave to us and there was no money attached to it, it would be enough. Yeah. I don't think the other way is true. I think if somebody received millions of dollars in an inheritance but had no value, nothing, nothing conveyed in in their hearts towards each other, nothing that that would feel like there was a generational momentum in the way that we lived, um, I I believe that would be pretty empty. Yeah, and so I I believe it can be a both be a both and it's supposed to be a both and. Yeah. Um, and I believe that, you know, just because just because we position ourselves as sons and daughters, um, that I believe that there is a even a monetary inheritance that can be passed on. But it's so much more than that, and that's just a small piece. But again, it's what the money represents. And so if if you're if if you're thinking about it and saying I do want to sew into the next generation, I think that has value, and I think that's maybe at the heart of this question. Um, but it pales in comparison to all of the other things, absolutely, you know what I mean? Because that's that's the true value, and so we're we're doing this podcast with our hearts full because all we've been doing is thinking about the things that we've inherited, yeah, you know, which has been tremendous, and so the the the inheritance of values, yes, yes. So, my you know, at my dad's memorial service, um, I was able to share, all of us brothers shared a little bit of something, a different aspect of my dad, his testimony and and just the personal relationship. And I was able to share something about covenant, which was his life message, and it was impossible for me to do in seven minutes convey my father's life message on covenant. Um, but I I summarized it, you know, as basically all that I have is yours, and all that you have is mine. Yeah, and the covenant begins from before time through the new covenant in Jesus' blood. Yeah, and and it's it's it's a legal transaction that takes place um between two entities. And so here's God saying, I am the God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Um, you I will be your God, you shall be my people. It was a covenant he made, and then Jesus comes along and said, This is the new covenant in my blood, which just blows you away because we inherit everything that Jesus inherits. It says we're co-heirs with Christ through his blood and what he has shed for us. But there's also something called family covenant, which is relationship. So husbands and wives, we're in a covenant relationship called marriage, which means all that I have is yours and all that you have is mine. And so we're it's an everything thing. And uh, and so but we're also in relationship with our parents and our siblings, and um, those are those are covenant relationships that he's given us, and it's beautiful. So I did that in three minutes. It doesn't do it justice, but it's it's so beautiful and it's so um powerful in the transactions that take place in relationships. So here we are at my dad's memorial service, and and there's something that is to be conveyed, yeah, even upon his passing. Yeah, and and so the covenant is the terms, the inheritance is the tangible reward of that return, of that, of that, of the terms. And so here we are at his funeral saying, okay, we're his family members. Guess what? We get to inherit all of it. So everything that my dad contended for, yeah, all of his victories, all of his all of his monetary gain, all of his relational equity, everything that he established throughout the years is all ours. Yeah, and all we have to do is take it. Yeah, because it's it's a legal transaction that actually takes place even upon his death. We have relationship in his life, but even on his death, we actually get to inherit all of it. And uh so we did.

SPEAKER_01 14:49

Yeah, we did.

SPEAKER_02 14:50

So that's what we did at the funerals. I uh I just had our family stand up. There's a lot of us, and we received we took all of it. And why wouldn't we? Because it's ours. Um, and so that's how it works. And so when we're talking about inheritances, um, I just submit that to all of you that you know you don't have to inherit the bad stuff, but we get to inherit all the good stuff and all of the uh the the the victor all the spoils of the victories that has taken place over a lifetime um is ours generationally, yeah. And so it's a it's a beautiful, wonderful, powerful thing, and I expect the fruit of that in my own life just because of what my dad conveyed to me.

SPEAKER_01 15:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 15:30

And how long until we actually get the full picture of understanding that when it says that we're co-heirs with Christ, how long until we actually fully understand what that means? Yeah, like how we're supposed to live with full access to heaven. Yeah. I think I think I think we limit, we limit ourselves and we we put everything under a blanket of unworthiness, yeah, and and fully missing the fullness of what Jesus died for, which was the covenant in his blood.

SPEAKER_01 15:56

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 15:56

So he shed his blood to make it so. And and man, I think it would be the right thing to do to take all of it.

SPEAKER_01 16:02

Yeah, the too big.

SPEAKER_02 16:04

So I'm just gonna take I'm gonna take all of that too. So we're taking it all. Um, but also having the mindset that our our children inherited it as well. And so I want to I want to live with an inheritance mindset so that the things that I'm contending for and the the the victories and the the things that we've contended for in our lives are theirs as an inheritance.

SPEAKER_03 16:23

Yes, amen.

unknown 16:25

Amen.

SPEAKER_02 16:26

I did a lot of talking there.

SPEAKER_03 16:27

I liked it. You were on a roll.

SPEAKER_02 16:29

It was good. Well, I just received a lot, and it's been so it's been a good week. And so we're a little emotional, but it's but it's powerful and it's it's it's right. And it's like if you have an inheritance sitting on a table and you leave it there and just say, Well, I'm not sure it's for me, not sure he intended it for me, and we just walk away. What a shame. Yeah, you know what I mean? And so um my dad's life was well lived, yeah, and there was a lot there. There's a lot there. Yeah, and so we get we get all of it. So that's a good thing. And so I want to live that way too. So I I think the answer to the question is both and I think there's a there's a monetary piece to it, but that's just that's just one aspect. Yeah, it's just one aspect of a full inheritance.

SPEAKER_03 17:10

I agree. I feel like you need to pray us out, honey. Okay, you're on a roll.

SPEAKER_02 17:14

Now my nose is raining.

SPEAKER_03 17:15

I know I don't have a clean extra.

SPEAKER_02 17:18

So, Father, we we do understand that there is a covenant and that there is an inheritance and that there's a legal transaction that takes place, not only on earth, but in heaven. And you call us to live uh like heaven on earth. And so that's what you've given us. And so, Lord, as as we talk about inheritances in family, because that's what it's connected to, Lord. I just I just pray a blessing over these family covenants who are listening um in on this podcast. Yeah, that they would fully understand not only what is theirs, but also what is theirs to give away. I I pray for a generational mindset uh to live life um beyond our own lives and uh and think about the future generations, Lord God, because it's so powerful. It's how you set it up to be. And most importantly, Jesus, I thank you for shedding your blood as the new covenant that we actually get to inherit all of heaven. It doesn't seem fair, it seems like a one-sided deal, but that's how you set it up to be, because you love us so much. And so, Jesus, I'm so grateful for your covenant, for your obedience to shed your blood, so that we could live under the covenant, under the umbrella of your protection, under the umbrella of your covenant, under the umbrella of your love and your resources. It's all ours, and so we take it as sons and daughters, we take it uh as as as physical um parents and children and siblings, um, that we get to we get to operate into this kingdom uh with each other uh in the fullness of what inheritance brings. And so I pray this blessing right now in Jesus' name. Amen.

SPEAKER_00 19:00

If you would like to submit a question for Johnny and Amy to answer on a future episode, head over to the FAMology page on our website at gofam.org, or simply click the link in the caption below. And if you're enjoying the show, be sure to leave a review or a comment wherever you listen to watch. It really helps us out. Thanks for tuning in, and I'll see you next week.