A Whispered Thread
Explore the sacred guidance that weaves through everyday life through signs, Spirit, and the soul’s quiet voice. We share real experiences, wisdom, and practices on living authentically, working with energy, intuition, and embodying the soul.
A Whispered Thread
Damn You Uranus Let Me Create
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We sit with the reality of feeling stuck and show how loops can form after grief, burnout, and big life transitions. We share how we use curiosity, body cues, and astrology timing to stop forcing a breakthrough and start moving again in small, grounded steps.
***Disclaimer: This podcast is a space for storytelling, intuitive insight, and shared experiences with Spirit. The content provided is for informational and educational purposes only and is not intended as medical, psychological, legal, or financial advice.
We are not acting as licensed professionals, and nothing shared here should be taken as a substitute for professional care or guidance. Always seek the support of a qualified provider for your individual needs.
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Welcome And Ground Rules
SPEAKER_00A whispered thread podcast where intuition, astrology, and laughter collide. This isn't your love and light playground. It's real, it's raw, and it's right now. We are your hosts, Brianna and Katie.
SPEAKER_01Go grab a cup of tea and get ready to snuggle into your soul. This podcast is a space for shared stories, intuitive insight, and connection with spirit. Everything we offer is from our personal experience and perspective. It's not medical, psychological, or professional advice. Please use your own discernment and seek support from a qualified professional when needed.
SPEAKER_00Welcome back to an episode of A Whispered Thread. Today
Why Feeling Stuck Shows Up
SPEAKER_00we are going to be talking about just feeling stuck and loops of things, how sometimes we just feel like we're stuck in this loop. Everybody gets stuck. Everybody has that feeling where it's like, oh, I feel something. I don't know what it is. I just feel stuck. I don't want to do something, right? So I wanted to talk about that a little bit today because I was in that for a little bit after I had lost um my baby boy bro. And I know that Katie's kind of feeling it, right?
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_00Big time. Plus, it's eclipse season right now. The today, the day we're recording it, is the uh solar eclipse in Leo. So happy solar eclipse and eclipse season. Um eclipses generally like make us feel stuck because we're entering into something new, but we don't quite know yet. So even if you don't have something going on, it's kind of already there, anyways. Um, but first thing I do want to say is it doesn't matter how long you feel stuck, right? I feel like we we pressure ourselves when we feel stuck, like we need to hurry up and get out of it.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_00And that's what I I want to start this off by saying like it doesn't matter how long you've been stuck, what you've been feeling, how long it's been happening, like don't try to rush out of it because I really do believe that it just like happens when it needs to happen. So I'll kind of start. Um, I know that like through grieving, a lot of times we I don't know, for me, I feel like a lot of people will go, oh my gosh, like no, you're just grieving. You're not stuck, you're just grieving, right? I hear that a lot from clients, I hear that a lot just from people in general, where it's like, oh, well, you know, I'm grieving a loss and now I'm just stuck. For me, being stuck and grieving is two different things. Do I feel like the grief can contribute to feeling stuck? Absolutely. But for me, it was I was grieving and I knew that I had grieved way before, like during the process of what was happening. And then it was like I told myself I don't want to move forward. So it was now moving from grief to let's stay here. Let's see how long I can stay here.
SPEAKER_01Was that conscious or unconscious?
SPEAKER_00A little bit of both. There was a part of me that knew I needed to move forward. Consciously, I wanted to stay there, but also subconsciously I wanted to stay there too because why it felt better. It did, it felt better. I was able to be in the present moment during that whole situation, absolutely. But then I was like, oh my gosh, why do I like it here? Yeah. So it was a little bit of both, right? I didn't want to get out of bed, I didn't want to be a mom. And I know that sounds crazy because it was my dog, but I know there's a lot of parents out there that because for me, if you have a dog, you're a dog mom or a dog dad. It doesn't matter just because you didn't give birth to it. Like, happy freaking Mother's Day, you know? And so it was like that for me was like losing a child. I didn't want to get out of bed. I was depressed, I was grieving, I was angry, I was sad. And then I started moving through all of these things, and it felt good to just rest. And then my brain was like, okay, no, even spirit was like, no, you're doing good. You need this rest, right? You need to go through this. But then it got to a point where it was like, I want to stay here. I don't want to move. I don't, I want to stay in this feeling of just being stuck because it feels easier than doing anything else. It feels easier than cleaning, which everybody knows I'm a clean freak. It felt easier than just getting up to take a simple shower. It felt easier than making the bed. It was like, no, no, no, no, I'm gonna stay here. And thankfully, I have, you know, my husband who supported me through all of that and like literally picked up so many of the pieces that it was amazing that I was able to be there for as long as I was. And then
When Grief Becomes A Loop
SPEAKER_00one day it just clicked, right? Where I was like, We're in a loop. And I told him, I'm like, we literally both are in this loop, and I want out of the loop. And he goes, Well, what do you mean? Like, you're not happy. And I go, No, I am happy. And I go, but I want out of the loop. I want to live. And he was like, Well, babe, he was like, I'm happy with our life. I'm like, so am I, but that doesn't mean that I I want to be in the loop. Like, what do we do every single day? We wake up, I know if I have a client that day, so then I'm prepping for that. I wake up, I get the kids ready, I make sure the house is clean, I deal with my clients, and then I move on, and then you come home from work, right? I do dinner, and then you come home from work. We have our little time together, we watch a TV show before we go to bed, we take a shower, and then we wake up in the morning, and it's the same freaking thing. So then I was like, okay. And he took it very well, right? He was like, Okay, babe, I guess I didn't recognize that it was a loop. I thought we were living. And it's like, he's like, How do you get out of that? I'm like, I don't know. Do something different, right? Like, let's brush our teeth in the morning with our non-dominant hand. Let's like figure out something small to get out of the loop. And I don't know if he did or not, but I did because that next morning I woke up and I was in meditation and I had asked myself, why do I want to be stuck? What what what's happening here? What's going on? And I had heard that it's because I was afraid of moving forward. A piece of me didn't want to let go, a piece of me didn't want to enter a new phase, a piece of me, and because what we know this, right? When there's death, whether it is uh a death within side of us, like metaphorically, whether it's a physical death, we know on the other side of it that there's something beautiful and a new beginning that is on the other side of it. And I was like, absolutely not. I don't want this new beginning, I don't want these new routines. I don't I want my old routines. I want to wake up in the morning, let Brutus out, let the dogs out, feed them, play with it. I want that back. No, I'm not moving forward to this new beginning. Absolutely not. So it's like, okay, Brianna, well then what are you afraid of? Because in the past, when I was stuck, there was also an underlying a deeper thing that was saying you're fearful of something, right? So what are you fearful of that you want to stay stuck in? And so it was like, ugh, well, there's no fear there, but there was a little bit, but it was more so okay, but you don't want to build new routines. And we were just talking about this. I am someone who's very structured, like everything is like oh, everything's timed out, like, okay, we're good. And now it's like you want me to move into something else. No, no, no, no, no, because he was my whole nervous system. So not only was I like trying to regulate that looking differently, but now there's a new routine. Now it's like I just want to be where I was and I want to stay here because it's easier. So once I heard in meditation that day that it was like I'm I don't want to move forward because I know something good is there, because that would be wrong. There's nothing wrong with that because I know that with any death, especially an animal who they're literally unconditional, would never want us to stay stuck. Yeah, they would never yeah, they don't they're like, no, we we can move forward, like I'm still here, let's go, you know. So I was like, okay, and so it was this whole thing, right? And then I did get energy healing, and that was also very helpful. So for me, getting unstuck looks different, just like it kind of looks different for everybody, right? But for me, to get out of it the times that I have felt stuck, it's like, okay, what is happening underneath it? It's like when we talk about anger, right? What is underneath anger? Sadness. So for me, it's like the same thing with being stuck. What is actually underlining stuck, what's under there?
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Does that make sense? Yeah, for sure. Because it, you know, you had these two competing parts of you. The one that's like, I'm ready to get out of this loop, I need something different, and the one that's like, no way, we're not gonna do that. So then you had to lean into that part of you and start asking questions, getting curious. I
The Question Under The Stuck
SPEAKER_01think that's a huge piece of that, by the way, is being curious, not like punishing, not angry at it, right? Like you weren't coming at it with some sort of emotion. You were just like curious of like, okay, what's actually happening here? Uh and then you started interviewing that part of yourself, right? Like, what is actually going on? And that what question did you say you asked? Because I think that's a beautiful journal question.
SPEAKER_00Anyash, what is underneath this feeling of like wanting to stay this way? What why am I actually choosing to be stuck? Yeah, that phrase right there. Why am I choosing to be stuck?
SPEAKER_01Because it is power back in your hands. Yeah, it puts the power back in your hands. Because even the the unconscious, right? Anything that's unconscious, if it's in our subconscious, it almost feels powerless, right? Like we're powerless to it because we're stuck, it's there, I don't know what it is. And just by phrasing, like, why am I choosing this? It puts the power back in your hands. And then getting curious puts like opens the door to it, right? So I love your process. I think that's beautiful.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, and it honestly happened when I was, I kept seeing a loop, a loop, a loop, a loop in meditation, you know, the day before. And you know me, I'm someone who has to like talk it out, right? So, like, why am I seeing this loop? What is happening here? What is going on? And then it's like, well, do I have a loop? So then you're looking at the loop, and then it kind of just falls into like I feel like once you ask a question, then of course, spirit's gonna provide, like, here it is. Okay, fine. I felt honestly, I felt like my whole spirit team, like ancestors, everybody came in and was like, Yes, she asked the question. It was like, she's listening. So it was like, okay, cool, here we go. Like the ball started rolling, and it was like, okay. And then of course, it was like, you know, then sometimes you get too much information. And then for me, because I dive so deep, I asked too many questions. And then then it kind of so you know, you got to take a couple of days to process it, and then you're able to be like, okay, I'm processing it, kind of makes you feel stuck again. But at least at that time for me, personally, because I know everybody works differently, you know. So, like you can ask those questions, go on that deep dive, but then at the end of it, you still feel stuck, you know. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01How how would you say that you process it by just letting it all go and doing something else?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, honestly, what I feel happened is is I during the grief process, I was so angry and I was trying to surrender um that I had did my surrender like a week and a half before, where I had literally before I had all of these aha moments, right? Where I was like, okay, I surrender, I'm just gonna do whatever I need to do. I was yelling, I said some not so nice things out loud because you know I had to get it out and I was going through that process. I really honestly feel what happened was is that it kicked in. That surrender kicked in to where I was able to move into acceptance to finally ask the question.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And then once you ask the question, how do you when you because you said that you ask the question and then you got to give it a couple days to process? How does somebody process? I know everyone does it differently, but for you in particular, when you say you're processing, you're no longer asking questions and you're just kind of like letting it all sit and doing something else, not focusing on it. So it's kind of letting it rest so that it can move through you.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I wasn't asking any more questions. I got answers. So now I have to process those answers. And then I literally don't do anything. Like, okay, so we'll kind of rewind this so that people can understand. Normally, what I do every day is I wake up, I talk to my body, right? We've talked about this. I ask it what it needs, what it wants me to know. And then I listen to that and I have those cues where I'm like, okay, this is this is what could possibly happen today because I had this happen. Okay, cool. When I was in the grieving process, it completely stopped. I didn't check in my, I didn't check in on me. I didn't, I was just like, I'm gonna be here now through this whole thing.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Then when I I woke up that day and was like, you know what? I need to check in with me, but instead of checking in with my body, I did it differently where I had checked in because remember, I was trying to break out of the loop. So I kept seeing loops. So for me, whenever I see loops, how do we get out of it? And for me, it's always doing one small thing differently that day, right? So my one small thing that day was instead of asking my body, I asked my team. So I said, okay, what do I need to know today, guys? Like just give it to me. And even though I didn't hear anything, I felt like just it wasn't a hug. It was just like sit with yourself today. Ask. And it's like, okay, well, I don't know what to ask, right? And then of course I word vomited on Lewis, and then it was like, we're in this loop, and da-da-da-da. Have my Frankie moment, and then it was like, oh my god, I need to ask. That's what they were trying to tell me. Yeah. So it's like that small thing put me out of the loop. And then the next day, I did, okay, I'm asking the question. This is what I need to know. So then the following day, I went back to not asking my body, not asking spirit, because I don't like relying on them for everything. So if they already had provided me an answer, why am I going to keep asking questions? Because that's where I like screw myself over.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00So that spinning mind. Yeah. So I was like, I'm going to go back to what I was because I was comfortable there. And it was quiet. I didn't have to think, I didn't have to move. I literally just, there was nothing. It was nothingness. And that's where we kind of want to be to get answers, right? Is in that place of nothingness, neutrality. So there would be times when when, of course, our mind will do things where it would come up and be like, oh, well, what about this? So it's like, okay, well, if that came to me and I wasn't asking anything, then I'll dive into that, right? Like, why what is truly happening that I'm I'm choosing to stay here? Is it because it feels good? Yes. Is it because this is what my higher self wants? No. No, it isn't. Okay, so how do I get out of this? Right. And then it would be quiet again. And it's like, okay, so it was basically like a combo of both. But for at least two days, I didn't ask a single question. If I heard a question, then I would just take it and roll with it. But it was actually pretty quiet. And then on the third day, I had already planned a session. Um, so that worked out.
Body Truth Vs Spinning Mind
SPEAKER_01If you if you're somebody who has a spinning mind, how do you know it's a question that you need to answer right now? So are you feeling the question a different way, meaning you you can feel it kind of coming up from your soul or from your body versus it coming from your spinning mind? Yeah, my body feels it.
SPEAKER_00I feel calm.
SPEAKER_01I don't feel like it's allowed. Yeah. So if if it's this if your mind is spinning and you're asking all these questions, it's almost like anxiety questions or or urgency. It's like, okay, that's my mind. But when it's a a kind of a quiet, soft question that just arises, then you know that it's from your body and it's okay to like look at that and start answering that or seeking that answer.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I always feel calm and I know okay, so I feel calm, my chest doesn't feel heavy, my stomach doesn't feel like it's in a knot, and I'm not feeling as though I'm being yelled at. Because for me, when I know that it is not, I know when it's from ego or fear, when I get a pit in my stomach, when my chest is heavy, when it is so loud, I feel like it's just repeating, repeating, repeating, repeating over and it's like, oh my God, stop. So that's how that's how I know when it's like, okay, I can dive into this. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01When it's not that that stuff, you know you can dive into it.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And if it is that stuff, right, this is when we have to use some of our tools to like shake it off, go dance, go for a walk, right? Like you have you have to move that energy somehow. Um, if you're spinning, if you're if it's, you know, depending on how it's moving through you, right? Like you would have to go do something to to move that energy first to drop back into your your body and into your heart and and hear your soul.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, to come from uh to come from like a neutral place, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I was able to move it out. I did do an energy healing, and that was moving it out because I knew I wasn't ready to clean yet. Like, yeah, there was no way. It's like, no, I'm not doing that. And that really helped moving through that. But like you said, everybody's different. Like my version of stuck may look different from somebody else's version of stuck, or me becoming unstuck could look totally different than somebody else's way of becoming unstuck.
SPEAKER_01Totally. I think though there's a a universal way though, that like if we step back and look at what you're saying, right? It's like it's step by step. You didn't just like get unstuck and oh, I'm I'm fully running now, right? Like I'm on the runway and I'm out of here. You took step by step by step, depending on what you felt, what you heard, right? Like grounded action. So it wasn't like you were one thing got you unstuck. No, it was multiple things, multiple things, step by step, and each time, like dropping back into a groundedness and a patience of like, okay, I did this step, now I've got to wait. I gotta process. Okay, I did this step, now I have to wait, I gotta process. So I think that's beautiful because that to me feels right, not to say that somebody can't do one thing and they're off flying again, right? But I think more often than not, it is these little steps and patience and like one by one, like you did, versus like one swoop and you're done.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. No, because I know that I this is the way that I would put it. I forget what the saying is, but it's like you've you've had something with you for so long, right? So we'll use stuck as an example. If you've been stuck for like four months, don't feel like, okay, I'm working on this step by step, and tomorrow I'm better. Yeah. No, no, no, no. If it took four months, it's gonna take like two months to get better. You know what I mean? Because you're gonna have to be consistent with it. Because yeah, once I was feeling unstuck and I saw like light at the end of the tunnel, did I finally clean? Absolutely. But then it was like the next day, it was like, ew, no. You know what I mean? So it's like giving yourself permission to know, okay, I feel good today. I don't feel stuck today, so I'm gonna take care of what I need to, but don't do what I do and try to tackle it all in one day because then you're gonna, you know, be beating yourself up the next. Day because you overworked yourself. It's like, no, try to slowly merge your way back in. And that's actually what happened this time. Because previous times that I had felt unstuck, I would do it where I would do everything in one day. And the next day I was taken out again. And so then it was like this time I chose to do it differently, right? Because the whole part was, why am I choosing this?
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_00And I did the dishes one day. And then the next day I was like, okay, I'm gonna sweep, but I'm not gonna mop. And then the next day I mopped. It was like little things every single day to stay consistent instead of trying to. I I wanted to consistently stay in neutral instead of I want to stay stuck. Because honestly, that's where I was. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Makes sense. The other thing that I feel like we need to highlight here is that all or nothing
Small Moves Over All Or Nothing
SPEAKER_01thinking, right? Because I'm a person that does that. And so like if I'm stuck today, then I'm like, oh, I'm stuck forever. This is gonna last forever. And then you're panicking, and you're not even right, you're not even like grounded anymore because you're like projecting into the future that this is it. And so I feel like that can happen really easily for myself. And um, it's a great reminder for all of us. Like, this is right, today I did these steps because I can. Tomorrow, okay, well, I guess I'm stuck again today. I'll just I'll just be with this part of myself. And the next day you make some movements again, being able to to like mentally clock that where you're like, see, I haven't been stuck, I've made movement. Because then the brain goes, ah, it's forever. We're screwed. I'm you know, I'm failing, whatever. That all or nothing thinking is is a difficult one. Yeah, I do that too.
SPEAKER_00I usually do that though. I'm the same way. Where it's like, no, I'm I go big or go home, whether it's a good thing or a bad thing.
SPEAKER_01I'm very much that way too. It's like, let's go. And then when it's in moments like this, where it's like, no, actually, you made some moves today. Can you just be happy with that? Can you be thankful? Can you see the progress? Can you let that be real in your body? And then if the next day you're stuck again, remember what you did yesterday and know that tomorrow might not be the same, right? Like that's huge. Especially when we're in our luteal phase, because that's where I'm at. So even right now I'm laughing at myself because I'm like, yeah, you're doing that again. Because I'm in my luteal phase and everything is like burn it all to the ground, screw it all. I'm sick of everything, I'm stuck. And then I'm just
Cycles Sacred Rest And Support
SPEAKER_01like, ah, and uh, and then we know how it is, right? Then our period starts, and we're like, oh no, everything's okay. I'm good. Like, I'm why was I even that upset? So even that we have to think about as women where we're at in our cycle and what is happening within um because it's huge, it it really matters.
SPEAKER_00It does, yeah, because we do do that. But I think that's what's beautiful about it, right? Is like we have those moments where it's like, oh my gosh, now I know why it was like that, right? And then then we get into like the follicular phase and we're like, oh my gosh, I I'm ready to tackle everything.
SPEAKER_01Like everything's okay. I love my husband.
SPEAKER_00I love I love my partner, right? Like, isn't that funny how that happens? We're gonna be that meme where it's like everything's fine, but everything's burning in the back. We're like, yeah, we did that, we burned it down. Yeah, exactly. We're ready to start over.
SPEAKER_01Somebody sent me a little um clip, whatever they're called, a real on Instagram. And she's like, Yeah, when I'm on my period, like, send me away. Do it. I'm crazy. Send me away, please. She's like, Can you imagine if we just got to be sent away for seven days? Like what that would do for our lives. I'm like, Yeah, sign me up too. I'm ready to go away for seven days.
SPEAKER_00But you know what? And I don't know if we talked about this on here or not, but it's true. That's what it used to be like, right? So they would have the what they would call the shaman, which would bleed on the full moon. So there was like one or two, and they would take care of everybody during the new moon phase. They would go into a hut, everybody knew the men were hunting, they were getting the meat for them for the iron, you know, all this stuff. Everybody knew, okay, they're in the hut for a week. You know what I mean? And it was honored and sacred. Yes, it wasn't frowned upon, it wasn't like, no, it was celebrated. It was a ritual, it was magical. It was like, yes, like okay. And then they knew after this, right? It's just like what we're talking about being in a loop. We know that or death or whatever you're going through. It's like we know at the end of it something exciting and beautiful is on the other side. So we're literally allowing ourselves to die. Yes, which amazes me how we don't die during our cycle sometimes, because it's like, how do we lose all of this? But we're still living and functioning. And yeah, and we get squeezed to death by all of it.
SPEAKER_01It feels like we're just, you know, being squeezed and 100%.
SPEAKER_00And then there's people who still have to work on bless your souls. I remember when I was working and on my cycle, it was like the worst thing, and it's like literally a dishonor to yourself. I don't know why I put myself through all of that shit, because it's like I wasn't even present at work because I was either in the bathroom or I was in pain. So I, you know, and then I was doing a lot of heavy lifting, which made it worse on the body, and then you get home and you're exhausted. Where to now it's like, I think once you, I mean, obviously people can work when they do it because I did it, but it's like you get to this place finally, I think, where you're just like, no, I I want something different. Yeah, I want something where I can honor myself or a company that I can start or work for that will honor those times for me because you it is a time of rest, it is a time of receiving, and I think people forget about that that receiving is the big part of it, right? So, like Lewis and and Ryder, they know they know, oh mom's on her cycle. Okay, Lewis cooks meat. He writer will like help out more around the house, so like I can literally just rest. And it isn't something that like I told them to do. No, it's like I wanted to show Ryder there's gonna be a time when you're with somebody or even your future wife. You need to know these things. Here's what it looks like, here's what it feels like. What are you gonna do to make her life easier?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, which you're gonna have a future daughter-in-law that thanks you. That doesn't always happen.
SPEAKER_00No, it doesn't. But I mean, even for Lewis and I, it didn't happen until you know four or five years ago.
SPEAKER_01We can all strive to have men or partners in our life that that honor that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, but honestly, I feel like it's I feel like it only happens when you finally honor your body. Yeah. Because I wasn't honoring it, so how could I allow anybody else to?
SPEAKER_01Yeah, it's so true.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I think it's a beautiful thing when Brittany starts. I already like have her little basket made. Excited for her. Yes. I want to do like a little ritual, like let's burn everything. Let's dance around the fire. Cause I didn't get that. Yeah. So I want to be able to give that to her. I feel like it would be very healing for both of us. Like, yeah. Her knowing like it's okay. This doesn't mean I'm losing my innocence. I'm just growing. Yeah, I think it's beautiful.
SPEAKER_01And honoring, we don't do enough of this. We celebrate the next stage by honoring what was and having some sort of celebration to move into the next phase. Those are such huge practices that we are lacking.
SPEAKER_00It really is. I think I've I've talked about this with you before. We don't celebrate enough. Even the little things. It's like, you know, especially when you're stuck, right? How come you can't celebrate yourself for getting out of bed that day?
SPEAKER_01Yeah. Because we're expecting the all or nothing. I should be totally thriving right now. And if I'm not, then I'm just pissed again and I'm focusing on how I'm stuck. Right? Like that's kind of what happens. We don't see the small things and then celebrate them.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
Career Stuckness And The Void
SPEAKER_00Okay, so let me ask you a question. When a couple of things that I want to ask, actually. So with you feeling stuck, have you gotten to the place where you feel good to ask the question of like what's under it?
SPEAKER_01Well, for mine in particular, I guess I've been kind of stalled or stuck for a long time. And so well, if I'm gonna be honest, I feel like everything I am trying is not making any movement. So I will ask questions, I will do something different. I feel like I'm doing all of this. That's part of the reason. So when we talked about doing this podcast today, I'm like, I don't want to do it because I'm so stuck that I'm not gonna have anything to say except for, hey, it's okay to be stuck. Right? Like that's the piece where I'm like, I think that is the one thing I haven't done is accepted that I'm stuck and maybe I don't need to do anything. Maybe I need to stop trying because I keep trying and I keep trying and I keep doing and I keep asking and and I'll do what I hear to do and I'll toss things up or I'll do nothing that day. Um, I'll let it all completely go. I I feel like I've kind of done everything and I'm still I'm still stuck. In fact, what I said to you, which is what I said to my husband this morning, is it almost feels like an orgasm that's stuck where you feel it building and you can feel it there, and I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm about to break through. I'm about to have this moment, and then it goes away. And this has been happening for a really long time. Like I would say a couple years at least.
SPEAKER_00Years, years because it's in my career. Okay, hold on. I want to unpack this. I want to unpack this because I didn't know it was years. Yeah, because it's within my career, right? But I feel like you still have light bulb moments and they're still very successful when you put it out there, right? So, like, okay, let's look back to just creating this, right? We were sitting on it for a very long time, and then everything lined up and we moved forward, right? And now it's like, okay, were you really stuck within creation of career, or were you telling yourself that you were stuck? Or is there a mask that you were putting on?
SPEAKER_01I mean, good question, because I did move forward with this, but and I do my sessions all the time, and that feels really good. But I'm looking to create something. I want to create something more. I want to create because this is like our joint venture, right? And it's kind of like over here and it's beautiful and it feels really good. And then I have my sessions that are flowing with my clients, and that feels really good. But there's the there's this piece of me that is wanting to create something more that I can dive into, that I wake up every day and I'm really excited to do. And I mean, I don't know if you've ever felt that, but when you create something, sometimes you just you wake up every day and you're just so excited to get at it, whether it's learning or creating another piece, or um I haven't felt that for years. I felt it in 2020 when I started Soul Sparks, and then you know, I did that for what, six years and it died out, and I knew it was time for it to go away, or five years, I think I did it. Yeah, the last year, yeah, five years. And so I guess when I say a couple years that I've been stuck, it was through the death. So again, was I really stuck, or is it just the process? But is through the death of Soul Sparks and now the creation of something else, there has been nothing for years and like what almost two years now, because we're gonna be in 2027, and the death started before 2025, right? So if I feel like the death started in like 2024, and so yeah, I'm waiting for that aliveness for that, like, because I've had this so many times in my life where I just feel so into it that I can't stop thinking about it, I can't stop creating it, I can't stop learning, and it and it just is a fire burning, and I and that fire is where I feel stuck. So I know when I look at the bigger picture, is my career stuck? No, I'm very blessed and I'm very thankful and I love my sessions and I love what we're doing, but for this particular piece, that's where I feel stuck.
SPEAKER_00It's almost like a void, though. Like the way I see it is as like, okay, it's not really stuck, it's a void because there is some creation that's there, but you don't know what's in it, right? Because in the loop, one of the things that I had said is I want us to live. And these are the words I used to him was I want us to wake up and be excited to do what we love. I don't want it to be like a loop of this is what our day looks like. Like, no, I want us both to get up. I want us both to learn something new, I want us to just create. And I told you this, but I've like been feeling like I need to write a book. I didn't know what it was, I don't care what it is, like, but I keep getting this, I don't get anything about what it's about. But what did I do? Right, since I was finally feeling better and I wasn't stuck anymore. An idea popped in my head and I started just writing. Yeah. So what if you do something like that? Because that's not my book, right? Yeah, that was just something to to put out there to say, okay, yeah, I feel this, I don't know what it is, but I I don't want to feel stuck. I want to feel alive. So how what can I do to move forward? And then it was like, boom, write about this. So then I'm writing, writing, writing, and then it's like, oh my gosh, okay, cool. Now I've let some of like what I'm saying is is maybe doing something like that, writing without thinking, just something that you already know, is taming that fire of what you're feeling because you're putting something in the void. Does that make sense? Yeah, it does.
SPEAKER_01I've also just been in a place in my life too where I'm at a kind of a standstill with some things, like we're ready to move, yet we can't move yet. Like we're, you know, my daughter is still living with me, she's ready to move out. And so, like that's starting to happen. Uh we're in a lot of rebirth stages that haven't kicked off the ground yet, and that's kind of what the void is, right? Is you're just kind of there as things are shifting. Um, so I can feel
Eclipses And Old Chapters Returning
SPEAKER_01that too. You know what's fascinating is that a lot of this the astrology right now is like thinking back to 2007, 2008, and like what was happening for you back then. And uh that was when I had my spiritual awakening, and like I was working at the tattoo shop, and I kind of went through like a dark night of the soul, and next thing you know, I'm learning how to do intuitive reading. I started my business. So 2008 was a huge shift for me of like my identity, what I loved, what I did, everything, everything transformed then. And so it is kind of fascinating that I'm kind of in a similar spot right now.
SPEAKER_00Well, and then with the eclipses, it's actually trying to close out cycles from 2014. So think back to like 2015. That was when I got sick.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. That was when I got sick and and I started to get sick um with like adrenal fatigue and things like that. And by 2017, I had to like go home and but 2014 was a starting point with that where things started to really um the things that I had suppressed for so long started to get loud, and I had to like move my practice to my house and start taking care of myself in a whole different way.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01And that started in 2014, 2015 space.
SPEAKER_00Well, yeah, because the sun, the north node was in Leo and it was going over our sun. So it's like we have to do things differently, right? We're being pulled towards our purpose for that time. So how are we going to take care of ourselves? And if we're not taking care of ourselves, especially with matters of the heart, right? Like being compassionate towards ourselves, doing what we love, saying how we're feeling, like letting that fire ignite. If we're not listening to it, then of course our body takes the hit. Yeah. Yeah. Cause now what's happening is it's closing that chapter out. Yeah. Because now we have the south node in Leo, which is south, the south node is what we need to move away from, right? We want to move towards the north node because the south node we're already comfortable. We have mastered that, we're comfy in that, we get it, we know it, we want to stay there. But then the north node is pulling us towards something else where it's like, no, we need to move here. Yeah. But it's like, no, I don't want to do that. So I'm wondering if also that's a big part of it, too.
SPEAKER_01Well, that makes sense to me, right? Because what I'm trying to do is come back alive after all of this deep, deep inner work. And I keep asking, like, okay, where can I place my energy? Where can I do that? Let's, let's, let's grow, let's be alive, and it just doesn't come.
SPEAKER_00And so you're feeling that because it's in your sixth house, right? And I feel like the sixth house, because the sixth house is like health, right? Because you have the eclipses in your 12th house, which is that deep healing. It is that's where you have Leo, right? So it is healing, it is, you know, the art, it is what we do. Um, then you have the sixth house, so it's more spiritual hygiene and taking care of yourself on a spiritual level, your mind, subconscious mind, um, past life healing, all that jazz, right? Which is great, but it's also a big ending. Then you have your sixth house, which is still taking care of your health, but like your body, your routines, stuff like that. So I feel like if you were able to move into shifting that, because that's where the north node is for you, you would be able to say, you know what? I've done all of this, I surrender to all of that. Now, how can I move into acceptance and and put it into, okay, I learned all of this when it was in Leo, right? When the north node was in Leo. Now that the north node's in Aquarius, how can I integrate everything that I went through and teach people new routines? Because for me, when we're going through a phase like this, what happens? We're helping others, but we're also getting messages for ourselves on how to move forward with it. Does that make sense?
SPEAKER_01Totally. And it's so interesting because I feel like everything you're saying. So I have discovered different ways that I want to teach that and how I want to start bringing that out into my um career and maybe create some classes to show how I move through, right? Because everybody moves through it differently, but there's gonna be some people that resonate with the way that I move through it. And so it that will excite me. And I think this is the part, like we're getting to like the heart of what's happening here is I will hear and I will feel for a moment exactly what I want to move forward into. I'm like, oh yeah, that's what I'm gonna do. And I've I think I've even like messaged you before. I'm like, I want to move into this, this is what I want to do. And then we like celebrate it, and then it goes flat and it's gone. And there's nothing for me to grasp. There's nothing for me to move forward. So then I just wait again and I wait. And so it's almost like I'm feeling the embers, right? I'm feeling the sparks, and then something in me is squishing it down, or it's not time yet. I'm just supposed to gather ideas and it's not time yet. But it the there's there is something that's been happening for a long time.
SPEAKER_00Okay, so for me, whenever I have a ton of stuff coming in and it's like I'm getting answers, it's like, yeah, this feels good, this feels good, this is what I want to do. Then I write it down. Yeah, I have. Yeah. And then when it's like, okay, I feel like there's nothing there, I look back at the notes. So now how can I take all of these things that I've had already gotten and implement them to move forward? I don't want to ask the next question. Like it's almost like you shouldn't be asking the next question because it's where we get into that place like we were talking about earlier. We get into a scattered mind and then we either freeze or we just burn it down.
SPEAKER_01I will feel a spark. I will feel it, I will go to do it, and then it goes blank like. Like the void that you're talking about. Literally, there's nothing. And I sit there for a while and I wait. I'll put my pen to the paper or my hand to the keyboard. And then next thing I know, I'm like, half hour, hour later, there's nothing anymore. And I move on. I can't explain to you the emptiness. Like it's so funny because I know because I'm telling you like everything that I feel like you're saying. I'm like, yeah, that makes sense. So I would sit down and I would just start going. And then I sit down to start going. There's nothing. It becomes like literally like all of a sudden I'm just twirling my hair. And I'm just like, I don't know.
SPEAKER_00And then I wait. So then when I asked you if you write it down and you said yes, in those moments that you feel good, that's what I'm referring to. When you're in a good place, right? And you have that feeling of, oh my gosh, yes. Or if you get a download and it's like, oh yeah, I would love to do this, right? Or your mind tells you something, your body tells you something. Do you write it down? Yes. Okay.
SPEAKER_01So it doesn't go much further from that. There is no next step. There is no, I could do this. There's an idea, and it doesn't progress from the idea ever for a while now.
SPEAKER_00For me, it's a trust thing, right? Okay, Spirit, thank you for giving me all of this information. And now, Spirit's like, okay, trust yourself to move forward. Yes.
SPEAKER_01Which is why I keep showing up to trust myself to make a move. Like I said before we started doing this, that I almost feel like the answer is to be stuck and to be okay with being stuck because apparently it when it's time, it'll come.
SPEAKER_00Well, yeah, that's true. That does happen. Okay.
The Tower Uranus And Timing
SPEAKER_00Sorry guys. We took a little step back. I know you can't hear it on here, but we did and got a little more vulnerable with each other so that we can continue this. And in my mind's eye, I kept seeing the tower. So of course, I grabbed my deck and was like, let's see what we got here. And the tower came out, but I saw it differently. Now move it to astrology. Uranus represents the tower in astrology. So I'm like, let's look up her chart. Let's see what we got going here. And we have an astrology critical degrees. So whenever we're exiting out of something, that is a critical degree. Whenever we're entering something, it's a critical degree. So when anytime we have something at like 28, 29 degrees, zero degrees, one degree, those are big critical moments in our life. And a lot of times we feel stuck, especially when we know we're ending a big chapter, but we can feel a new chapter coming, and that's kind of where we get stuck because we want to be over there. We can feel that crumbling, we can feel the rebuilding, but we're not quite there yet. In astrology, we're at the last degree. It's gonna move. We're gonna get there. So it's okay to be stuck for right now, especially when you incorporate, you know, you what you're hearing from spirit, what you're feeling in your body. We've done all this work, we know all of this. Well, yeah, and then you back it up with astrology where it's like, hell yeah, you have you're at the last critical degree, and then you're entering into a new phase, which is also very critical. How are you gonna feel about that?
SPEAKER_01So, what you were saying when we we weren't on record is that I'm in the last few degrees of Uranus in the ninth house, yeah. And it's about to move, and then there's Sagittarius, which is fire energy, that's about to come in, but I'm not there yet.
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_01So it's really kind of like what I was saying when I was resisting this podcast is like maybe what I need to get on there is tell people I need to get on there and tell people if you're stuck, it's okay. That sometimes you can't do anything about it because of divine timing. Because that's really what we're looking at with astrology, right? Is like when there's planetary alignments that are kind of forcing us in quotation marks to go through something, when it shifts, that's the divine timing that opens up the next piece. And we we can feel it, we can sense it, like you said, and we want to get there now, but we can't get there. And so me saying, like, I'm doing this, I'm doing that, I'm doing this, and nothing is working is because it's not time yet. No, and that's frustrating as hell, it's super frustrating, but it's also beautiful when you actually sit and look at that, it's like I'm not doing anything wrong, I am doing the work, and when I do try and dig in, I am getting pieces of my next stepping stone, but it's not time to create them yet. No, and that again sucks. It fucking sucks, but it wasn't until, and this again happened off of recording because we kind of paused this and dove into it, is that it wasn't until you just said all that about my chart that my body, my stomach, everything just relaxed. Cause I'm like, yeah, that's what I feel is happening.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I guess it's exactly what is happening in astrology. We have a balance. So, because there's two, there's an axis both sides, right? So if you have, you know, Gemini in your 10th house, and then you have Sagittarius in your fourth house, we depending on where it's at, we need to have that balance. We need to meet in the middle. How can we incorporate both? So for you, yeah, like I was saying, everything's in your head, it's all up in your head, right? And then until I look at your chart, it's like, well, duh, what is Gemini in your fucking head? God damn it. Yeah, then you have the fire, right? In your fourth house. That's like, yeah, because what is fourth house? It's creation. And so then to have fire there, it's like, yeah, you feel the fucking fire, but it's not time. You have to move that out so that you can find that balance. And that's where it gets tricky because a lot of people do whole house, right? I don't do whole house because that means it's kind of blanketed, you know, you don't have the actual degrees of where you're going from. So if I were to do whole house on you, then technically it's already, well, to that aspect, it's already in your 10th house, but it isn't, yeah. It would, it would look totally different. So when you do non-hole house, what happens is you actually get to see it. You're moving through your ninth house of beliefs of higher learning, knowledge. Yeah, I have all of this, I've worked on that, I've closed these chapters, I've pushed through them all. And then what is across from that is our third house, right? Which is our mind and how we're moving through things. And you do have a little bit of Sagittarius there, but now it's more, it's wanting to move more into your fourth house, and then also not quite yet to your tenth house. So there can't be a full balance there yet. There's no, it's a little off-kill dirt. Yeah.
Permission To Pause And Closing
SPEAKER_01I'm like, that's that's how I feel. So if any of you are out there, one, you might want to get an astrology reading. Brianna can do that for you, by the way. You can check out her website. Or if you have your favorite astrologer, maybe you need to get an astrology reading too, because we're all a part of these planets. We all have personal placements within these planets, and we cannot force them to change. No, we work with them, and we surrender to them.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it's our blueprint. We get to work with it. Are challenges gonna happen? Absolutely, but it it lets you know how to work with those challenges. Yes, yes. And honestly, amazing times, and we get a roll with that.
SPEAKER_01That's where we like, right? We don't compare. It's like, well, how come you move through and I'm not? I did all of that. My gosh, that's unfair. I'm doing something wrong. What's wrong with me? Right? That's when the mind stories come in. We can only do as much as we can do and be really pleased and loving to ourselves, you know, pleased with ourselves, loving to ourselves until that planet finally fucking moves.
SPEAKER_00Damn you, Euronis. How dare you! But it's just I find it just so beautiful though, when we are able to utilize all of our tools in a different way, you know? Like, even for me, sometimes when I get stuck, I'll whip out the tools, but then it's like, God damn it, Brianna, like you know this. Why didn't you why didn't you pick up this tool first? Like you, but I go through every tool set, right? And then it's like, why didn't I just sit? Why didn't I known this, right? But it's supposed to happen. Yeah, that's where we get to have those aha moments. So it's okay if you're utilizing every fucking tool that you have in your box.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_00Sometimes we get to do that so that we can have the clarity. We know that we carry that knowledge, that wisdom. We know that it's there. And then it's like, okay, yeah, I can relax into this now because I know that I'm I'm not quite there to embark yet. I'm not quite there yet to touch the fire. I'm allowed to be stuck right now because this is my time of pause. Yeah. Exactly. I think everybody needed this today, though. Everybody at some point, everybody feels stuck. So it's okay to know that it's okay if you're stuck. And it's okay to be angry about it.
SPEAKER_01It's okay to be frustrated. Yeah. So I think this is a great place to close out. Yeah, me too. Thank you for your wisdom. Thank you for letting me get upset. Yeah.
SPEAKER_00I told you get mad, and you're like, I am mad. Okay, but how mad are you?
SPEAKER_01Thank you to everybody who listened to us move through this today. You're still here. We appreciate you very much, and we're so thankful that you're taking this journey with us. Oh, burnout. Oh, burnout.