Ep 44 - Grief, Growth and Standing Ground

This week on Messy but Motivated, I’m sharing some raw life updates — the heartbreak of losing our dog after 11 faithful years, where things currently stand with our move, and a much-needed reminder for believers living in a world full of distraction and deception.

With so much noise surrounding UFOs, UAPs, fear-driven headlines, and things designed to steal our focus, it’s important to remember this truth: as Christians, we already know who wins.

The enemy thrives on confusion, fear, and distraction, but we are called to stand firm, keep our eyes on Christ, and not give attention to what pulls us away from His peace. No matter what’s happening around us, our foundation doesn’t change.

This episode is about grief, trusting God through transition, and standing your ground in faith — because when you know the Author of the ending, you don’t have to fear the chaos in the middle.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome back to Messy But Motivated, you guys. I am your host, Melinda. Welcome back. Yes, I've been MIA. I've been MIA. Life is crazy. Oh, it's crazy right now. It is so crazy. So, all of you already know I had um shingles. Okay. So, whoa, put me out of the game completely. Like, knocked me out. Not fun. Um, two out of ten, do not recommend at all. Um, and then just life. We're in the middle of a move. We're moving to Florida. Um, many of you already know that. And lots of moving parts. Lots of moving parts. Um, because we also have in the middle of the move, so selling the house. Um, we we had a yard sale, of course, because we have so much stuff, and we're actually downsizing um a lot moving there. Um, so yeah, we have that going on. And then we had the kids' going away parties, Carson's birthday party, just all of the things. So let's get into it. Let's get into it. Cam. I know. For those of you that don't know, my dog died. Cam died. Yeah, she did. Um, we fought the battle with her diabetes. Um, we were not winning. Um it was we don't really know what was happening. Um they said, you know, we could send her to Iowa City um and she would, you know, go through some type of treatment. It was a hard decision to make. Um, but we looked at how old she was, she's 11, um, and we were just kind of like, we don't want to give her, she was miserable. The last few months of her life, sh she was miserable. I would say the last month and a half for sure. Panting. Um, she just couldn't get comfortable. She she was miserable, and we couldn't watch it anymore. We couldn't do it. Um, we've we prayed on it and we're like, we're doing this for us at this point. We are doing this for us. Like, how selfish of us to do this to her because she's miserable. So we ended up making the hard decision. But me, Mike, and Chloe were around her when she went. Um it was so hard. And I'll tell you, it's it was hard. I had a rough few days. Um and that's how it goes, you know. It we knew she wasn't gonna outlive us. Um, we knew this day would come. It just came way sooner than what we thought. Um Lulu's doing okay. She's we're just spoiling her, keeping her busy, lots of walks, lots of treats, all the things. Um, but man, it's hard. It's hard. Um life without her here in this house is just so weird, so different. Um but I I I just thank the Lord that I we got to be her parents because she was she was the best. Um so yeah, I I I've been dealing with that on top of life itself. Um it was definitely a curveball, but I'm just glad that she's in heaven now and she's happy and she's healthy, and um I know I'll see her again one day. So and let's just say I'm not getting another animal anytime soon. Like I can't deal with it. I can't deal with it. I'm gonna be a one person dog for a long time because I I I I can't do it. I can't do that again. I can't I can't no. No, I refuse. Um, our yard sale. Our yard sale was last weekend, went really well. The first, okay, so I did it Thursday, Friday, and then on Saturday, oh my gosh, in the middle of the night. Well, I wouldn't say it was probably two or three in the morning, my shingles started acting up so bad to the point I woke my husband up. It was the worst pain, the worst pain that I have dealt with um in a very long time. I I can't really even explain it. It was as if somebody was taking out my eyeball. That's the best way I can really share it and explain it to people. It hurts so bad. I know people were like, oh, shingles hurts really bad, you're doing really and I thought, man, I thought I got away. I was like, ooh, nothing. But that hit me, and when I tell you it hit me, it hit me hard. Um, the only thing that was really good is I was taking my gabapentin and staying on top of that, and uh, you know, but with that came nightmares. Um, and I'll tell you guys what I have in my life, okay, there was a time in my life where I had been, I was having nightmares. Um, it actually started when I was on my ship. Um, I remember writing my mom a letter and basically telling her, hey, like, this is not good. Like, no, like I don't know what's going on. I was having horrible, horrible nightmares about the man downstairs. Um, those went away, I'm I'm sure with prayer and all of that, because my mom had everybody praying and um ended up that went away. It happened again when um I would say over a year ago, so when I hadn't quite started following the Lord, um, I was definitely under attack. Um I woke up one day, I told my husband, I said, I need a cross, I need to wear it now. Like I was there was it was not good. Um, the only cross I could find at the time was Mike's mom gifted Chloe a cross. Um, and I had never even given it to her, but I opened it, put that on until we got me mine. And I I I can't really explain. It was the most horrific nightmares about the man downstairs, okay. Um, what's crazy about all of it um is the fact that every time I have a nightmare like that, it's the same, like he looks the same, things are happening the same, and all of that. Okay. So on the day I took my Gabapin, I took it thinking, okay, whatever, I'm just gonna go to sleep. I'm in a lot of pain. I went to sleep and it was the most horrific nightmare that I've probably ever had. It was horrific. Um, and of course, in my dream, they were telling me that I wasn't gonna wake up. And that scared the crap out of me because they had they had told I said this is a nightmare, you know, and I was yelling like I'm covered by the blood of Jesus, like all the things, and they were like, You're not gonna wake up. Like you, this is this is it, this is your life now. And it was just so real, it was so vivid, it was so scary. Um, I woke up and I looked at my husband, and I was just, I was a mess, you guys. A mess. I was scared to sleep because it was so real, and the things that were happening were so real, I was like, I don't want to go back to sleep. But the meds were fighting me, so we were going back and forth. Like, I was just like, this is horrible. I ended up um because I told my mom, I said, I am this isn't good. Like, I don't know, I'm ner I'm scared. Like, I'm scared to sleep. That's the best way I could really say it. And um, so she ended up texting because I couldn't look at my phone. Like my eyes were hurting so bad, I couldn't even look at my phone. I couldn't text people, couldn't nothing. I was, when I say I was miserable, I was absolutely miserable. Miserable. Um, my mom ended up texting my my small group and was like, hey, you know, because I told her I said, I need people to pray for me right now. I don't need uh like I need hands-on prayer. Like I need people to come put their hands on me and pray. Like there is something getting me right now. And of course, Mike looked up and it was like saying that this medicine does do horrible nightmares, and I was just like, Whoa, I I but in my head, I'm like, I can't go back to sleep. Like in my dream, they had me thinking that my husband was against me, my husband had been drugging me. Um, and so I was looking at him a little funny, and he's like, hey, you know, stop. Like, I was just like, I don't know. Um, I I saw things that I didn't want to see, like, just it was not good. Um, so my small group showed up for me. I like I'm telling you guys, it was the most beautiful. It was just, I can't really explain it. They showed up, they everybody said a prayer. Not one person said a prayer, you guys. Every single one of them, even the people that were uncomfortable, they said a prayer. Like, they put hands on and prayed. And when I tell you, like even my pastor, my pastor came over. Like, you guys, I I can't explain. It was just so beautiful. It was so amazing. God sent his people to me, and I I truly believe I was under attack because when they left, I got the best sleep ever. I got the best sleep ever. I'm telling you, it was the best nap ever that I've ever had. Um, it could have been that they had put in uh anointing oil on me and they were doing all the prayers and all the things. Um, but it was, it was just the best nap ever. And and I I am so thankful. I am so thankful for the people in my life for because it was it was scary. It was really scary. And I don't, I yeah, we'll leave it at that. So yeah, just having your people, I can't explain it to you guys. Have your people, have your people that are going to drop whatever it is they are doing and come put hands on you if you need prayer like that. Because there are times in life where we need it. There are times in life, and and I'll tell you, it the last weekend I was just like so amazed because I would never in a million years you would think of me being the girl being like, people come pray for me. But I was just like, no, I I need it, I need somebody, I need hands-on prayer. Um, and it was beautiful, and I I just can't thank all of them enough. And that's going to be so hard to leave because I'm scared of I I'm so and I and I know my faith is so strong, and and I know God will always put people in my life that are just going to make me a better person, and and and people that He wants me to be around because I pray on that a lot, but it's scary leaving them because they have always been my people. They are my people. Like, I don't know where I would be in my faith without people like them in my life. Um because I've never I've always put a wall up to up to people in my life. Like, if you weren't my two friends, I was putting a wall up. And that's just how my life was. And now that it was like all those girls kind of ran through and broke down the wall, and now it's like, oh, so scary because now I'm like, okay, now I'm leaving. Now I'm I'm leaving, and it's scary. And it's scary. It's it's really scary, but I know that God's gonna send me amazing friends, and um I'm never going to be with like I plan on coming back and seeing them. I all the things. Like, I'm not, you know what I mean? I I just yeah, it's it's gonna be hard, but I'm gonna get through it, and I know that God's got huge plans for me, and one day I'll look back. Right now, it doesn't all make sense, but one day I'll look back and it'll all make sense. It was also hard to see, like my daughter had her going away party. Oh my gosh. The notes she got from these kids, you guys. Oh my heart. Oh my heart. One of them, she was like, Thank you for being my best friend. Lean on God during this time. Oh, it was just the cutest thing. And during Chloe's going away party, that little girl had locked herself in the bathroom and was crying, and I was just like, Oh, this is so sad. It was so sad because it's like I can't I can't really explain it. I know the feeling of being taken from your friends because I I I know it all too well in my life. And I never wanted to put my kids through that pain, but also like I know that I have to do this. I know that there's a reasoning. I know that um I know I just know that there's amazing things gonna happen in our lives with this move. Um, God's placing us there because he needs us there, and we just have to be obedient and we have to go. So I am just being really strong for my kids and letting them know like this isn't the end, you're still gonna come back, you're still gonna see your friends, um all the things. So it's hard, and I I think it's hard because I know the pain. I've been there, I've done it, it's not fun. So, and mine wasn't ever really even lose leaving the state. Mine was leaving, you know, going to another school, and and yeah, we're only like 20 minutes away, but I knew that I wasn't gonna be with them all the time, and so it's just too relatable, and it's not fun, it's not fun as a parent because you you feel like so conflicted, you're like, I know we need to do this, but also it's really tearing them up. So that's alright. I'm praying on it a lot and just relying on my faith right now. I want to tell you guys about I haven't even talked about this on social media. Like the only person that knows about this is my husband and whoever's gonna listen to this. Um man, I got I got humbled. I got humbled. I have been praying to the Lord. I was like, I feel like there's something. There is something, and I don't know what it is, Lord, but there's something I'm holding on to, and it's my idol. Anything can be an idol. I want you guys, and I'm gonna tell you what my idol was, and you guys are gonna be like, yeah, I guess anything could be an idol. Anything can be an idol. And in my mind, I was like, I don't have an idol. I don't have an idol, you know. Um, I don't, I just don't, I just don't have one. Like the Lord has transformed me so much that I don't even, when it comes to like celebrities, like, ooh, Christian music and stuff, like I just want to be there to worship with you. Um, I am not like, oh, let me hang out with you. Like, that's not that's not it at all. Like, I want to worship with you. Um and I I just thought I was like, oh, this is great. Like, I don't have anything that's an idol until I prayed on it. And I woke up the next day. And if God didn't humble me, y'all, if He didn't humble me, so many of you know I've been a reviewer um for what since 2020, 2021. And I have got so much, like I've been so blessed to get so much for free. Like I just go on the website, I pick out things, and then I review it. And it's been such a blessing in my family. I mean, amazing things I've gotten. And every night before bed, I would get on it and I would scroll and I would scroll. Well, it would be to the point where I would scroll and then look at the clock and it's like 11 o'clock at night. And I'm like, oh gosh, I need to stop doing that. And it's because all the good stuff would come on at night. So of course I would be looking for all the good stuff. And the first thing I would do in the morning was scroll because all the good stuff, all you know, I'm looking to see, did I miss something? Did I miss something? And I woke up the other day. This was the day after praying. If y'all don't believe in prayer, I'm sorry, but oh my gosh, the Lord, He is good. He is good. Now, this was hard, this was a hard lesson, but I woke up and it said that I was banned. And I was like, hmm? What? And it said I was banned. And I I emailed them. I still haven't gotten a response. I've emailed them twice just to be like, hey, like, what's going on? And nothing. And I was at first so upset. I was like, oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. Like, I could not believe it. I'm like, this is like wow, what, huh? And I, I mean, as you can imagine, I was upset. Like, you guys, that's like that it's been a blessing. It's been a blessing for sure. Um, but yeah, it got taken from me. And I have not been on it, and I realized even laying down at night, I I go to scroll and I'm like, oh my gosh, that was my idol. That was my idol. I was so for the last however many years, that's what I would do. I would get on there, I would order things, I would, and that's what I did. That's just who I was. That's what I did. That was, and he was like, hey, that's your idol. That's your idol. You could be going to sleep much earlier, but instead you're staying up so you can see the things. Um, first thing in the morning, you should be grabbing your Bible, but instead you scroll and then grab your Bible. Like these are things that you need to realize can be idols. And man, he humbled me. He ripped it from me and was like, figure it out. And it sucks. It sucks. But I'm doing well because I prayed on it and I'm like, I know what I know what you did. I know what you did. You took it from me because it needed to be taken from me. So, whatever, we're moving forward, and it was great while it lasted. I told my husband I said it was great, it was fun, it was nice, it was such a blessing, but also, you know, there's there's just nothing we can do about it now. So, yeah. Just remember anything can be an idol. Anything, you guys, anything can be an idol. Um, and I hope this really like opens your eyes and you're like, wow, ooh, yeah. I mean, it could be anything, it could be thrifting, it could be your phone, it could be um buying things online, like it could be anything, checking a website multiple times a day, checking your notifications. Uh, it can be anything like that. Um, and yeah, I I I was humbled and I figured that out real hard this week. So, but that's okay. All good things are coming. All good things are coming because remember, he doesn't take things with from you without replacing them with something better. So I'm just in the uh passenger seat waiting to see what's to come. So yeah. Um and today, our main topic on here. Sorry, it's already 20 minutes in. Today's main topic, I wanted to talk to you guys because I I I want y'all to know what I do before I even do my podcasts. I pray, and I usually the night before, I'll be like, hey, give me something to talk about. I don't even know what I'm gonna talk about. I wing this, I wing it, but I'm always like, give me something to talk about. Um, something that you want me to tell them because use me, Lord, use me. And I woke up at 5.02 in the morning. I was actually telling my sister about this. I have a note in my phone, which I'm gonna keep there. And it is from 5.02 a.m. And it is everything that he wanted me to say on this podcast. And one of the things was sharing that with you guys because I didn't want to share that. Like it's nobody's business, it's my business. But he was like, no, I need you to share that because people don't realize what could be a vice. Um, and the other thing he wanted me to share was the fact that this thing and the government and all this about UF, UAPs, UFOs, all the things, all the things we have got to understand as Christians, these things are not new. We know there's a spiritual realm. We know, we would be silly to think we were the only ones here. We would be silly to think that. I don't know what they are. Are they falling angels? I think they are. I think they I truly believe they are fallen angels. But who who am I? I'm Melinda. I don't know. What I do know is I am a Christian. What I do know is I am covered by the blood of Jesus Christ. What I do know is that there is nothing that they can do to me. There is nothing. And we as Christians cannot, cannot sit here and live in fear because the government decided now they want to put out the information when it's been here the whole time. So stop living in fear because of the information that's coming out right now. Who cares? What we need to do as Christians is understand that we need to stand our ground. This is our ground. The ground, the the war has already been won. We know, we know the ending, we know who won. You cannot say you're a Christian and then next thing you know, you're you're scrolling and you're scared, and you're, I don't know, I'm I'm just being a conspiracy theory, all this. No, stand your ground. This ground has already been won. We know who won. Jesus Christ. You have got to understand that your home should be covered by the blood of Jesus. Protection is over your home. Let them let people say, Oh, well, they're gonna start doing this. Okay, come by me. But as a Christian, I Know that the darkness has has no leverage to the light. No leverage. And so when we are sitting here and we're giving it attention, we're scrolling, and then next thing you know, we're we're we're going down the rabbit hole. What I need you to do, and this was actually one of the things I wrote down, is you need to be not interested. There is, if you hold it down on your TikTok, on your Facebook, whatever it is, hold down the video and it'll say not interested, hit not interested, and you ain't gonna get that information anymore. You are giving them what they want. They want attention, and baby, you are giving it to them. You are giving it to them. Stop. Stop it. You have got to understand this is a conversation that you need to have with other Christians. This is a conversation you need to have with your children that we have known about this. This is not new. This is not new information. This is just being handed to us because, oh, this is a great distraction. Here, let's tell them about how there are UFOs, how there's been this, and how that you guys have to understand, we've already known about this. It shouldn't scare you. If anything, this is giving us leverage to speak the gospel to other people. This is giving us what we need to say, hey, yeah, there may be. Yes, there probably is, but you know what will protect you? The blood of Jesus Christ. He died on the cross, he rose again on the third day, and he died for you, and he loves you. And anything that comes close to you, just mention his name and they will flee. It has no weapons formed against you will prosper. You have got to remember that. No weapons, nothing. Let them come for you. You are covered by the blood of Jesus Christ. It's so crazy that there are so many people that say, Yeah, I go to church, yes, I'm a Christian, yes, I'm that, yes, I'm this, yes, I believe in Jesus, yes, this. But then when it comes time to, well, I'm scared that, you know, aliens are coming, or I'm scared of this, and I'm scared of that. What what do you mean you're scared? The Lord tells us not to live in fear. You don't need to live in fear. That's a tactic, and you're letting them win. Stop letting them win, my dear. Stop it. There is so much more to be worried about in this world than aliens or UAPs or whatever it is. So much more to be worried about in this world. So when people are coming to you and they have things to say, did you see this? Did you see that? Did you see the website? Did you see I went on the website and this and that and that? Oh, yeah. I I didn't see it because I don't give it attention. Um, because I already know I have a hedge of protection over me. And none of that matters. You have got to understand that your influence, you saying that, and you just standing your, and I'm not telling you to be mean, but stand your ground and just say, ah, I don't give it all any attention. We've all known that there's a spiritual realm realm, there's this, there's that. We know that. And we'd be silly to think that we were the only ones here. But um, I don't give it any attention, and you shouldn't either. And that right there is not only called leadership, but that's called living the way a Christian should live. When we give them attention, that is what they want. And we have to understand as Christians, we need to shut it down. Shut it down, turn off the light. No, I don't care. Don't worry about it, whatever. And if you are getting any anxiety, anything like that, we are not supposed to live like that. That is not a way to live. You need to open your Bible, you need to be in your Bible more. I don't care if it's three times a day, I don't care what it is. Um it's you need to get closer to the Lord because He will ensure that Holy Spirit will ensure that you do not have anxiety from silly things such as UFOs, UAPs, aliens, whatever, any of that. You have got to understand that yes, we understand that there are peop there are people amongst us that hello aren't they could be, yeah. And that's what they're saying now. And it's like, okay, that makes sense. It aligns, that aligns. Okay. Doesn't change anything. Doesn't change anything. And they're saying, oh, get the church ready. You need to tell their your people this, and you need to tell no, I want you, this is what I will tell you. This is what I will tell you. And I I really hope if you take anything from this podcast today, it's this. Your faith should be so strong. It should be so strong that if anybody, and I don't care who it is, it could be somebody dressed up as Jesus Himself saying to you, there is no Jesus, this was all a hoax, and you were created by this alien and this and this, and they make up this whole thing. Your faith should be so strong that you laugh because you already know, you know the truth. The Bible that we read is literally the breath of Jesus. You have got to understand that your faith should be so strong that none of that would shake you. None of it. You would you can look at them it whatever and say, that's not true. I I know my creator, and it is not you. You are not my creator. That's how strong your faith needs to be. And if it's not at that level, I highly recommend you get there and you work at it every day. Because just knowing there may be tactics that they're going to use, there may be things that they say, there may be things that um that are gonna start telling us that this is not how it was, and this is a lie, and this is uh you have got to be prepared. And it starts now. It starts by opening your Bible. It starts by maybe not listening to the true crime all the time and instead listening to a to a podcast about faith. Maybe it's changing your friend group, not hanging out with the people who are sitting there doom scrolling about aliens and talking about aliens and this, that, and the other. Maybe it's hanging out with the people who are like-minded and want to go to church on Sundays or listen to worship music or any of that. This is the time you need to start preparing yourself because a war is coming. We know that. We know that there is a war coming, and you need to prepare yourself for it. And preparing yourself for it is not going out there as in a regular war and we go work out and we get ready and we start doing this, that, and the other. That is not it. Our weapons is what's inside of us. We are our own weapons. The Holy Spirit lives within you. You need to tap into it. You need to understand that you need to be mentally prepared and you need to have your armor of God on. Have your armor on. And when anything comes, anything, you should be able to stand your ground and understand what the Bible says and what is right and what is wrong. You should understand if they say this is, you know, this is this. You should understand. No, because the Bible says this. Understand and have discernment. Do not let them confuse you. Remember that God doesn't cause chaos. Jesus does not cause confusion. You have got to understand that if there is confusion, if if there's something that is that is just not making sense, go back to your Bible. Refer it back to your Bible. Have discernment. Make sure that you are standing the ground that Jesus already won. And I know that's kind of like a lot of people are like, well, this sounds kind of scary. No, we've always been preparing for this. We've always been preparing for this. Our ancestors prepared for this. This is, we're just feeling like it's closer because I'm gonna say it is closer. It's closer, and we can feel it. Those of us who have had the Holy Spirit within us, we feel it. Now it's just to tell everybody else, to warn everybody else, to say, hey, listen. I think I think it's I I think it's time I really start leaning into my faith. I think it's time that I repent. I think it's time that I finally say, you know what? Um, I know I said I would get into this later, and now's the time. Now's the time. Later is now. Later is now. Because I know there's something going on. I can feel it. And there may be a time it's too late. One of my biggest fears, one of my biggest fears is getting to the gates and being told I never knew you. That is one of my biggest fears. How do I know him now? Because I learn about him daily. I read about him, I pray with him, I have a relationship with him. And I need you to understand it is not hard. You are making it harder than it has to be. Pray. Pray. You don't have access to a Bible? Pray. Ask him to come to you in dreams and visions. Pray for discernment. Be around godly people. Stop making it harder than it is. But I do want to stress, now's the time. That time you were waiting for to really dig into your faith, it that it's right now. It's right now. Alright, that I I I hate even talking like that because I know people are like, that is crazy talk. It's not, guys, it's reality. It's reality, and a lot of people don't want to get on here. Instead, they want to do the whole foo-foo stuff and say, hey, you know, but God loves you. And don't get me wrong, God does love you. But can we talk about revelation? Can we talk about how everything is happening? Go and look in the book of Revelation. It is all happening. And we need to prepare these people. We need to prepare our people. Hey, this is this has already been prophesized. It's time that we learn how to how to enter this battle and how to win it. Because it's already been won, but we need to stand the ground that's already been won. We can't give up ground that's already been won. We cannot do it. It's gonna take God's people, you and me, to tell people, to talk about the gospel, to make people understand that this is this spiritual crap, this alien, this all it's always been here. It's always been here. It's not new. You're just finding out about it. Don't give it attention. It doesn't deserve attention. What deserves attention is the thousands of Christians that have been slaughtered because of their faith. What deserves attention is the fact that people are getting fired from their jobs because they're praying. Those are the things that need attention. The things that don't need attention are the things that are in the media that they just want to um shine light on because guess what? It keeps you distracted, it'll make you go down that rabbit hole. Yeah. I know that was a lot, guys. That was a lot, but it's truth, and I'm here to tell you the truth. I know it sucks. Um, I'm in seminary, as many of you know, and man, I was we're I'm in a leadership class right now, and the way they speak about how we need to, as Christians, be leaders. We need to say, hey, listen, this is this is the reality. I would love to just butter you up all the time and say, this is this and this is that, and everything's great, butterflies, rainbows, but I'm not gonna do that. That would be harmful. That would be harmful to Christians. So, yeah. All right, guys. I love you. Have a great day, week, whatever. We'll be back to our regular scheduled programming. I hope. I'm not gonna promise you anything because we've got a move going on. Remember, I have to be out of here on the 9th. Um, I will be driving, that's a whole thing, um, to Florida. Ugh, I don't even want to think about it. A lot of moving parts. So I'll try to get my podcast up and going and all the things as fast as I can, uh, which shouldn't be an issue. Um, because I want to keep you guys all in the loop, but obviously it might be an I don't know. We'll see. We're just winging it over here. Um, if you do not already follow me on social media, make sure you go Mrs. Motivated2025. Um, and I kind of vlog everything really on TikTok on what's going on. So yeah. All right. I love you guys. Have a blessed week. Bye.