He Went From Homeless, Prisoner to Being Her Millionaire Husband!

Can wealth actually make it easier to love someone, or does it create a whole new set of problems?

Agon Love and Sonya Love welcome Garrain Jones and Blair Jones, a real-life power couple who went from homelessness and waitressing to building multi-million dollar empires and retiring their parents!

Garrain and Blair get radically honest with Agon and Sonya about the silent battles behind building wealth as a couple, including ego clashes over money, identity crises after achieving every goal, and the moment Blair finally said the words that changed everything: "Baby, I'm tired. Will you take care of me?"

This conversation covers self-love, masculine and feminine polarity, building wealth from nothing, and why love is more accessible than money and always has been.

In this episode we cover: 

✅  How going from nothing to everything tested Garrain and Blair's relationship in ways they never saw coming

✅  The wealth mindset shift that took Blair from financial independence to finally asking for help

✅  Why Garrain believes any void in your life points back to one thing

✅  The practical exercise Garrain used while homeless that led to his first million dollars

✅  What happened when two high-achieving people had to figure out who leads and who follows

Connect with Guests!
============================
Follow Blair:
💜 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/blair.rachel.jones/
💜 Website: https://www.evolvedher.com/

Follow Garrain:
💜 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/garrainase/
💜 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@GarrainJonesOnline
💜 Website: https://go.artistpower.com/garrain-jones

Connect with Us:

💜 Sign up for Sonya Love's Dare To Love coaching program

Transcript

SPEAKER_06 0:00

Do you think your wealth has made it easier for you to love each other?

SPEAKER_08 0:04

So much more than money.

SPEAKER_06 0:05

Money, that's the mirage. People would say it's easy for you because you have money.

SPEAKER_08 0:10

If you want surface-level money, you'll be broken inside. And that's why you can have a bunch of people snorting cocaine and they have the world. It's because they're covering up something inside.

SPEAKER_05 0:18

Today's guests built their wealth starting from nothing. From homelessness to retiring their parents to building a life most people only dream about. But what they didn't expect was how success would reshape their relationship.

SPEAKER_08 0:32

Any aspect of your life that has a void and lack is a lack of self-love. How do you define love? There's different degrees of love, but there's something about I love myself.

SPEAKER_00 0:42

But still, we all need money. Money's just as important as air. God don't pay in money, God pays in your whole life. But would you still love me if I didn't make this money?

SPEAKER_06 0:54

How do you think it is shaping the women of today have in the mind that the best life they can live is the life of pursuing career and making money?

SPEAKER_00 1:03

That was really my own mentality. I can make as much money, oh, and I can have a baby, and I can birth a baby, and I can build a business. You can't do that. It was like, what was Garen needed for? And that mentality was then at the expense of my own relationship.

SPEAKER_08 1:17

And I think that everybody's confused about who everybody is.

SPEAKER_00 1:21

I can actually be more powerful in my surrender than I can be in my pursuit.

SPEAKER_06 1:25

What would you say to people who don't believe in love? Garen. Yes, sir. You went from homeless to a multimillionaire. And you, Blair, you went from waitressing to retiring your parents at the age of 30. Both of you are without a doubt what people would say a power couple. So what I want to ask you is a unique question. Do you think your wealth has made it easier for you to love each other?

SPEAKER_08 2:06

Let me go deeper into because you said homeless to millionaire? Homeless? Cheating on every girlfriend I ever had, too wealthy from the inside out, and a devoted husband and a devoted father. The multi-millionaires, that's cool. What fathering the next generation of humanity. That money can't even hold a candle, so I just wanted to bring it even deeper for me.

SPEAKER_07 2:38

Um I would say the continuous pursuit of growth is what brings us closer together.

SPEAKER_08 2:50

It is sometimes it might be Blair and I'm stuck in a thing, and then it's like she'll be waiting for me and I'll always figure it out, and then sometimes it'll be me and she's stuck in a thing. And I'm like so committed, and I know she's gonna figure it out. Sometimes it's both of us at the same time, which is where the amplified growth comes from. And um that is what I truly and strongly feel is what brings us together is the continuous pursuit of a forever growth that we signed up for. So much more than money.

SPEAKER_03 3:29

Yeah.

SPEAKER_08 3:30

So much more than money. Money, that's the that's that's the mirage. But it's what we have, what we create, who have who we have become. Yeah. Holy crap, we were two completely different people. You were saying when you started the pot, and y'all started the podcast, your hair was short, like our looks are different, the way we dress is different, the speaking, the the intrinsic inner standing to life, everything is different since we've come together.

SPEAKER_00 4:01

I I think that it had developed a certain level of skill set that we were able then to transfer over into our marriage because of what it took from us independently to create and build that from nothing. Uh, and so we have that same stamina. Garen always talks about it's just energy transferred. And so if we just take what the intrinsic drive and determine and success to accomplish and go towards something, we were just able to take that same energy and put it towards our marriage, which just brings a whole level of skill set and a vibration of a person.

SPEAKER_06 4:38

Okay. The reason why I ask this is because one of the main purposes of desirable for us is to help people believe in love again. And based on what I see, the sentiments when you go on social media and you read comments and there's some love stories, very often there's a common sentiment. It's easy for you because you have money. Right. And a lot of people self-impose these prisons of like, I cannot have this life of love because I'm not as rich as them. And we we ask this question, but we know the answer. There have been many moments when where our wealth made it harder as well. It's not only one side, it comes both ways. So I love your answer because I want to bring into people's lives the understanding that love is the most accessible quality, faster than money, even. So don't wait for your life to be wealthy before you commit to love. It's usually the other way around. You commit to love and the wealth comes your way.

SPEAKER_08 5:47

I want to speak into that because um I think it's in 2017. I went to I went to Africa, and it took me a plane to another plane. I was in Johannesburg, but then I was going to Safari. So I had to go from a plane to another plane to a three-hour car ride. And the further and further I got away from the city, the faces on the little African lady holding a basket with all this stuff on her head, and it's like six kids, and they had this little bitty house. I was like, I had never seen the only time I seen a smile like that was in a little kid, just watching them. And I was like, wait a second. And it was like a culture shock to me. It seemed like the closer was to the city, people were focused more on having, and the further away, people were more focused on being. It made me really understand you've got to focus on being because if you focus on love, I know people right now that their version of love is getting beat up because that's what they saw in their household. They're like, but he loves me, and you go right back. And and that's their version of love. So there's different degrees of love, but there's something about I love myself. I'm I'm I'm gonna like really you you back it up with discipline, how you take care of your body, your mind, your health, all those things is literally telling uh the universal field of vibration, I love myself. And any aspect of your life that has a void and lack is a lack of self-love. And then anyone in your life benefits from the overflow if you give that to yourself first. How do you define it? Love when you give to yourself and you care for yourself so much so that your cup overflows. Just think of a cup. Just keep pouring water, keep pouring water, keep pouring water. The outside is the physical manifestation of what's going on inside. And each container has a tipping point. You will know how much you love yourself based off of what shows up in its physical equivalent because the universe is gonna match your vibration, and so if it's off, if you're out of alignment, you're gonna see a bunch of out-of-alignment things in your life. You can't hide yourself from the vibration you hold.

SPEAKER_06 8:17

This is a very common sentiment we see, and I I love this. Almost every time we ask our guests what is love to them, they speak internally first.

SPEAKER_01 8:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 8:30

Every time it it's clear that there's a healing attached to not seeking outside of yourself, but rather creating the person you love in order to attract the person from outside that will love you and you will love them on the same level.

SPEAKER_05 8:44

It's that deeper even. It's not in order to even. It's that just happens as a byproduct of your devotion to yourself.

SPEAKER_06 8:52

Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:53

Karen has a really good quote. He said, Blair's not my other half. I'm whole and she's whole. She's my other whole because two halves make a circle and two makes a zero and two holes make an infinity.

SPEAKER_08 9:04

Beautiful. Because other people are like, oh, she's my other half. You're like, so that means you only see that person as a half a person.

SPEAKER_03 9:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:12

I independently will be amazing, whole, beautiful, so again, but us together is things that I could never imagine. So much better.

SPEAKER_06 9:20

We so agree with that. It's like there's three entities when there's a couple. That's you, you, and both of you as another entity. For me, it's 300%. I I was saying to her yesterday, I think I'm 300% better when I'm with you. Right. So I can be a hundred percent on my own. Pretty good, hundred percent. With her, I'm 300%. What do I choose? Obviously. Where I would love to continue is by asking you a question that is a little practical and a little bit more real-world shallower, but so important. For each one of you in the still operating in the world of finances, you have had a very interesting journey of coming from nothing to a lot. What would you give as a tip to people that you can say for men and you can say for women, so we have a little different mentality of like how can someone go from not having money to getting to the point where they're happy with how much they have?

SPEAKER_00 10:22

Oh, for me, it was just I was delusional. I w it was a place in which like I had, I mean, I'm from a small town. I was born in Two Harbors, Minnesota. You've never heard of it. There's 3,000 people. I rode my horse to school. I mean, it's I'm from a farm. Like it's it's funny. And so I distinctly remember I was like, I want to be in high school and I want to carry my own books. I want to be financially independent. And I knew these things very early on because all my parents did was fight with a fight about money. And I just was like, I don't want that. And so I go, well, if it's to be, it's up to me. And so it was such an internal drive, and no one could tell me otherwise. And the more that I quieted the noise of the external world and listened to all the people of Mel Robbins and um Sarah Blakely and Eric Thomas and Jim Rohn, and I just fueled all of my soul with that. I was like, there's no way. If I'm gonna, I we all need money. Money's just as important as air. It's it's up there. And so if you're gonna create it, well, I if I'm gonna do that. If I'm gonna go all in on something or someone, it's gonna be me. And you couldn't talk me out of it. And so I, to me, for women, it's like, what is your desire? What do you feel like you're capable of? And when you just it's so cliche, but the harder you work on yourself, the more that you can create. It's work harder on yourself than you do on your business, and the business will follow. And I asked Garen one time, I was just literally like, you know, how did you create such abundance? Because he was an anomaly to me, because he would just sing and dance, and then clients would call and he would just raise his vibration. And I was like, this is so crazy. And he's like, I'm in peak state. And I remember thinking to myself, I was like, I did that. I would listen to music in the shower, I'd have a whole dance party before I even went to work.

SPEAKER_06 12:15

You unknowingly followed.

SPEAKER_00 12:16

I unknowingly was doing a lot of this that I was raising my vibration because what's everybody else doing? They're pissed about going to their job, they're eating crappy food, they're in such a low vibration, they're literally not awake, they're unconscious. And I was doing the opposite. I'm getting up at 5 a.m. and going to work out. I'm preparing my food. I'm going to a crappy job. I was a bartender, and I'm jamming out before I even get to work. So when I walk in, I'm in peak state, although I'm in this circumstance for now. I this is my favorite line. You know, I may be here right now. That might be the answer right now. Or it's not yet. Or, and so I just always knew it was on the way, but I had to be delusional and nobody believed me. My parents had no laughed when I said I was starting a business, but it wasn't for them. It was my journey. And I think that's where sometimes we can get, and trust me, it's been hard and sad, and I get upset when people don't see what I see. And but it's such an like this is my dream. This is my life. This is my, it's so sacred to me that I'm going to create it. And then I also surrender it. I believe in God. I love Jesus. And I'm always giving it up to them. I'm always like, if this is placed so intensely on my heart to be this successful, to create this wealth, to build this business, oh my gosh, but yet I'm internally in this place or I feel stuck. Well, I so trust and surrender that you are creating a way for me. Like I if it's so clear in my soul and so lit up, you are gonna create the way and I'm gonna keep doing my part. I pray to God and I move my feet. I manifest it and I keep moving forward.

SPEAKER_06 13:52

How many years did it take for you to get from the point of optimism that's endless and then, hey, this is actually coming true?

SPEAKER_00 14:00

I started my business that way. And then you have a dip, and then you you question and you forget, and then you don't remember, and then you go back to the beginning. I it's um ignorance on fire. And I had to go back to being ignorantly on fire. Same thing happened. I had I build this gigantic business, took me in five, seven years. Then I go have two babies, I get married, I have an identity crisis. Who am I now? I built the business, I married the guy, I made the wealth, I retired the parents, and I was like, what am I gonna do now? And I got so confused and I just went internal. You can ask Aaron. I mean, I tried everything. I read the books and I tried the courses because I was just searching. And then I had to stay, I couldn't let other people tell me what to do, but I had to go back and be like, what sets my soul on fire? And I just kept searching and I kept searching and I kept looking and I kept going back and I just kept searching for the thing. And then I just found it again. I was like, oh my God, I freaking love nutrition. I freaking love women. I freaking love, I love being fit and amazing. I love empowering people about their food. I love teaching people about this. I love that. I'm gonna do it. Don't care. I don't know if I don't look the best as these people on social media, all these influencers that don't have kids, don't care. I don't care. It's fun for me. And then what happens? My energy. It has nothing to do with the thing. I'm so jacked up. My vibration is so high. And then what happens? People are like, I don't know what she's doing, but I want that. I'm like, I don't know a lot yet. But and they're like, don't care. I want that.

SPEAKER_05 15:34

What I really love about what you said is because today there's a lot of talk about men providing and women learning how to receive. And I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that. There's a lot of beauty in that as well. But what I love is that you already know you can create your own wealth. And that internal knowing is so powerful that regardless of how your relationship progresses and how you guys decide to, you know, split your money or provide for each other, that is something no one can take from you.

SPEAKER_03 16:04

Ever.

SPEAKER_05 16:05

That knowing I can build my wealth, I did it once, I can do it again, and you continue to do it. Because there is just a confusion I see a lot of people have, which is like, so if I'm a woman and I'm going for it and I'm building my business, then does that mean that I'm not gonna have a man? Because the man wants me to just like surrender fully and and not be able to make my own money and then the reverse as well. But in your case, it's like you can do both.

SPEAKER_00 16:34

You can do both. This morning, there was, I was like, I want to be in my feminine, but I also know what I want. And I want to lead, but I want to surrender. And so this morning he was massaging me. And so then I was just putting his hands where I wanted him to massage me. I took his body and I put his body where I wanted it to go. I told him where to and I realized I'm picking up on the cues.

SPEAKER_08 16:58

I'm like, oh, she wants me to touch her here. Because sometimes I'll touch her in places. I was like, she's gonna like this. And there's no body movement. I'm like, well, she doesn't want it. It's just my hands are in the wrong. So she guided me. I'm like, oh, I can do this.

SPEAKER_00 17:14

And then in that moment, I was like, oh my gosh, this is how the feminine leads. I can direct you where I want you to execute. I can lead you to where I want you to bring me to completion. I can show you the way, and then I can relax. And I realized that that this is kind of, I'm learning this dynamic inside of two powerful people and how to create that. I was like, oh, this is how you can be in that go-get and the create and the achievement while also still being in that divine feminine to create the word that we use a lot is polarity in our relationship.

SPEAKER_06 17:50

I love the self-authority over your wealth in the feminine. That's very powerful. How about you?

SPEAKER_08 17:58

I get the life experience before I know, before I can articulate what I'm doing. So everything I'm about to share is connecting the dots looking backwards. So I'm just gonna come from me being homeless, living in my car. It's like the typical excuse because I'm black, because of the president, because of the news, because of the weather, and every excuse I can for not being where I know I could be. But meanwhile, I have this little voice inside that says, Garen, run, you love to run. Garen, hike, you love to hike. Garen, do all these things you love to do, and I'm not acting on it. So I sit down with my friend Chris. He goes, because he just was tired of me complaining about like having no money. He brought me to his house and he said, I want you to write down 10 things you love to do and 10 things you're really good at. And I want you to go on Craigslist and find as many ways to make money. And I'm like, this is stupid. I was like, but you're broke. So you probably don't have, you don't have, you don't really have any options. And I'm like, all right. So I do it. I'm in Starbucks and I write down 10 things and I'm just writing down. I love fitness, I love, I love um motivating people. I'm really good with kids, but nobody's really gonna like hire a black man with tattoos to like work with their kids unless they're in the family. It's typically all women. However, I'm really good at it, so I'm gonna sign up anyways. Um, I love singing, I love all these things. So I put it on there and I stumbled upon um, I just came up with an idea while in pursuit of writing all the things. I was like, oh, I'll do singing telegrams. So here I am in my storage unit. But did not know this about you.

SPEAKER_00 19:45

Singing telegrams?

SPEAKER_08 19:47

Singing telegrams.

SPEAKER_00 19:49

Could you imagine if he showed up at your door?

SPEAKER_08 19:51

No, it was YouTube at first.

SPEAKER_00 19:52

Oh, I was like, wait.

SPEAKER_08 19:54

So what would happen was I live, I was living also sleeping in my storage unit and had good lighting. So you'd get really good lighting with all those white walls, and I would somebody would pay me$45 just to send their loved one a video of me singing. I had like 30 of these things in like two weeks. Wow. So I'm just cranking away money, and I'm like, man, I was like, what's a way I can make more money? What if I showed up in person?$125. So they're just cranking away. And then, you know, I wasn't getting any, I'm just the things that I love. No one, everybody get this. Write down a list of the things that you love to do and things you're really good at. If you can find the harmonization of what you love to do that you're really good at, that will be a hundred percent match. Now, let me go into the formula. I loved hiking, I loved motivating people, but I was so lazy. So I got my butt up and I went hiking to go motivate two people who only showed up. Then the next week, 10 people showed up. The next week, 30 people. This was all for free. Then there was like 50 people, then 75 people, then 125 people at Runyon Canyon, and nobody knows that I'm homeless living in my car. So I'm talking to them about nutrition. I know nothing about. I just know that you kind of eat healthy and you have these smoothies. But I was really good at fitness. I knew something about that. I was really freakishly good at motivation. I've been like that since I was five. So I'm had I have three things of the things that I wrote down. And nobody knew that I was homeless. So at that time, it was almost like a universal test to test you to see if what you want is what you really want. Because if you do it for the money, and this is from a holistic, you can step over people's backs, but I promise you, you're not gonna feel good with the dollars that you make. And I'm coming from a holistic standpoint. It made me feel so good doing what I love to do that I was good at. And I never asked for money. So it was almost like I forgot that I was homeless. I forgot about my current situation because there was a much more powerful energy at play. The very next opportunity I got was in health and wellness. And you know what they said? I'm like, so how do you make money? They said we get people healthy, we work them out, and we motivate them. And that's where my first million came from within three, three and a half years. Doing exactly what I was doing for free. And I passed the ultimate test because I was homeless and I found happiness in without. And that's why I'll know always gonna be good. You can take everything away. I will always have because I know what it's like to have nothing and be like that lady that I saw in Africa and have the biggest smile on my face. And that's why my world keeps replenishing itself because the energy that I hold during testing time.

SPEAKER_00 23:03

I will attest to that. I was at we were at Christmas and I was looking through all these magazines that his mom saved of him. And in 17 magazine, there's an article about Garen. It's called Gumbo. Get up, off your butt and move.

SPEAKER_08 23:15

Get up and move your butt operation.

SPEAKER_00 23:16

Get up off your butt and move operation. And there's a whole article about him. And there's like 150 people that he just called started with two. And there's a whole article about him. And I was like, he r so I was like, ah, did you did he really do that? And then it was in this whole thing. I was like, wow, he really did do that. And it was from the it's taken me a long time to figure out like how you did it from such genuineness. But he's like, if I lead with genuine if I lead with love or I lead with what brings me joy, the money always follows.

SPEAKER_08 23:45

If you want surface level money, you'll be broken inside, you know? And that's why you're gonna have a bunch of people snorting cocaine and they have the world, it's because they're covering up something inside. So it's important for me to talk about the intrinsic fundamentals on how to harness your energy when you're tested. It's when you're tested, it's not when it's easy, it's when the struggle happens. Can you find joy? Can you still find hope? Can you still find trust? And I know it because I've done it my entire life. And so if it ain't broke, don't try to fix what continues to keep working.

SPEAKER_06 24:27

The best leaders and teachers teach to those who are the past versions of themselves.

SPEAKER_08 24:32

Absolutely.

SPEAKER_06 24:33

And that's why when you speak, both of you, there's so much power to your words because you've been through stuff.

SPEAKER_03 24:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06 24:41

You've been through stuff. And what I love about what you said is that you gave a very practical tip, which is create a list of what you love. And w what Sonia and I we often like to say about things like that is that be radically honest with yourself. Because when you open, we call it window of opportunity, you manifest something and you open the window, and you need to be really honest with yourself. That window of opportunity will open once every few years. So if you weren't honest with yourself with that list, and you ended up in a situation because you wrote it to make money, you probably wouldn't deliver and it wouldn't guide you through life so powerfully.

SPEAKER_08 25:25

It interrupts the field of abundance. And God don't pay in money, God pays in your whole life. That's why I can see somebody and they're just successful in one area, and I'm looking at the rest of your life, and it's broken, flawed, flawed, broken, broken, broken. You know that there's overcompensation.

SPEAKER_01 25:43

Right.

SPEAKER_08 25:44

But when you look at the flowers, you just look at nature and that'll show you you that'll show you the universal truth. All the flowers bloom together. So when your whole life blooms together, you know you're in alignment. When you're out of alignment, anything that's out of alignment causes chaos. And so that's why, for me personally, I work so hard to build a strong base so that I can hold for how life may want to test you. And you know, we're going through it right now, but I'll tell you this: I just keep sinking deeper and deeper into trust, but I train for it. I don't train for it in the moment. I train for it knowing we're transcending to another level. It's gonna be completely different people at that next level, and I'm I'm fully here for it. And so is Blair. And the last thing I want to close out is you saw, you heard two different stories, but one thing is she's like, I think about it and then I keep my feet moving. Yeah. I wrote the list and I moved my feet. And those that's what makes the stories the same.

SPEAKER_05 26:47

And another thing that makes both your stories the same is that you start off with not identifying with what people see as their weakness. I'm I could say I'm black. I could say my parents didn't show me a relationship with like you don't identify with the I'm not homeless. I don't identify with being homeless. And it starts there. It's like you dared to create another version of you in your mind through believing in that from the very beginning. And that's what made you create that list in the first place. And a lot of people get stuck because they're like, this is where I am, this is my limit. And they've already created that limit. I don't see that limit in you. From no matter where you are at, whether you're here now and you're thinking about your next step, or whether you were homeless, or whether you're a waitress, in that moment you were always able to already see the version of you that you could be. And that is just so powerful. I didn't used to have that. And so I really value this when I see it in people because I feel like this is the one thing that has actually caused changes in my life and gotten me to see versions of myself that I'm like, hey, I I could be this too. And it's really cool. Another thing that I'd love to hear is I heard on a podcast you said, actually, you shared that she came to you and she said, I'm tired.

SPEAKER_08 28:09

Oh, this is my f one of my favorite stories of all times.

SPEAKER_05 28:12

It was really, really, really like it touched me because in a very wounded way, Aegon and I would butt heads when it came to finances because I just would not allow him to pay for things. Everything had to be 50-50, or everything had to be, you take this, I'll take that. And it got so bad that at one point we were in Singapore and it was COVID times and we couldn't get out of Singapore and we were looking for a place to live, and my mom's house, one of my mom's homes, were was empty. So my mom, I was like, Can we rent your place for from you? And she said, Yeah, sure. Um, but you gotta pay me rent. And I was like, Yeah, of course. But I wouldn't have had to pay my mom rent if I was living there. It's because we were living that together that we would need to pay her rent, and that made sense. So because now we need to pay my mom rent, I'm paying half the rent. And I didn't need to, but it was this like ego battle of like, no, I'm gonna pay this rent. Prove it. Prove it anyway.

SPEAKER_06 29:17

To make it a little funnier in that sense, we actually, as we progressed through life, we created a format because you weren't paying half. We created a format where we went by the percentages how much we make.

SPEAKER_05 29:30

That came after, and that pissed me off so much because I'm like, I literally can't pay half. So I have to go. We have the same percentage. Yes, we do this too. Yes, so we have the percentage. At first, it was like we go for a dinner, like a fancy dinner, and he and it was beautiful because it was at a point where Aegon was finally like his life was changing dramatically.

SPEAKER_06 29:54

He was getting rich.

SPEAKER_05 29:55

He was getting rich and rich. Right, let him go for the first time.

SPEAKER_06 29:58

And Kira Hope, she doesn't want my money.

SPEAKER_05 30:01

And he's like, I'm getting rich. Like, I want to pay for the date. You know? He wants to be able to do that. And I didn't realize that I'm I'm I'm taking the joy away from him. Right. Because I'm here to prove I don't need your money. I worked for my money, I can do it. And that went on for so long, and I didn't realize I was just a scared little girl who was so afraid that her partner was gonna come to her and say, I did that for you, and therefore, I didn't want him to hold that over my head because that like my parents were divorced, and money was so tough for my single mom in Singapore. Where I'm headed with this is you made your money. You did. You know I can build my own wells. You're still doing it today, but you came to him and you said, I'm tired. Will you look after me? How did you get to that point? How did that make you feel?

SPEAKER_08 30:56

I want to share this. Uh that was a paradigm shift for me because I've seen things, I've heard words like that before, but I could also feel the energy of I want you to do it ver I want it's almost like a using.

SPEAKER_04 31:12

Yes, yes, yes. This is not.

SPEAKER_08 31:14

And there are parents that literally train their daughter.

SPEAKER_04 31:18

Yes.

SPEAKER_08 31:19

And I know this because women have told me this. I coach a lot of women, yep. That like my mom taught me how to use men.

SPEAKER_00 31:28

How to be provided for.

SPEAKER_08 31:29

No, no, no. The word use was used in the conversation. My mom taught me. I know, I know I know singers, I'm not gonna say their name, whose mom was breeding them to use producers to get records on songs, like this is an actual thing. Then there's to how to get provided for, but I'm like you quoting a several people, like that's an actual thing. And so imagine I that's where that's the only thing that I know. But when Blair, who's a very powerful person, who had half a million dollar business, I mean, just flying, comes, soft voice, soft shoulders, and you know, she's five, seven and a half, but it seemed I can't explain it. It seemed like she was looking, I felt real tall. I'm six foot one, but it was like different. It was an inner it was in an energy that I had never heard, and she's just baby, I'm tired. I don't want to have to, and you you gotta understand. I watched her work and I watched her hair fall out. I watched her go against an energy that was unnatural to her system. So she had to recalibrate and create. She was like, I gotta do business a different way because her l pieces of hair would just fall out. Yeah, and she was like, I don't wanna have to do what I did to get here. And she's like, Will you take care of me? I something I never felt before in my life was like it was like the a seed, and it was almost like if see uh this seed could turn into wings, that's what happened. It was an energy I'd never felt. A month later, my company Artist Power sprouted, and I was just like, wait a second, is that hold on is that the power of a woman? Her like suggestion and the energy of when she speaks through her man, not to her man, it's through her man, and then the man it's it's plain and simple. What happened in sex this morning when she was guiding me in a specific energy and I could carry it out? That's what happened, but much in a much more softer tone. And a bunch of magic happened after that. It was, I truly felt in that moment, that's why God created couples to understand the the power of relationships and then what transcends through there.

SPEAKER_05 34:08

Thank you for making that distinction because it really is true that there will be women who will use that as well. There is a very different energy than going, hey, will you provide for me with that softness and surrender and knowing well that you're not using your man, but you want to preserve your energy? It you're literally going against the flow. You're going against the current. It's not natural to you. You can do it, but you're paying a big price that perhaps will he will not pay in that sense. 100. Exactly. And then there's the other side, and that's what I want to know. How did you go from I'm making my millions? I got my dreams, I can do this, and also I can show women how to do this to baby, will you take care of me?

SPEAKER_00 34:57

And it had to be a whole well, first it's uh it got me to the point. Like I'm so grateful for that boss babe part of me. I call her Aries. She's very intense. She's a billion-dollar rocket ship. She creates a lot of things. She's zero to a hundred in a second. Uh, you can't tell her anything. And I love that part of me, but she started to overrule everything. It was very much a prove-it energy. I had to make the same amount as him to prove that I was worthy of being his partner. I had to prove to myself that I could always take care of myself. And so it got to an unhealthy part of why I was generating this income or why I was building this. And what I didn't realize, I had hit the threshold. I had achieved everything I set out to do, and I just kept going. And I was like, what am I doing this for now? Why am I creating this now? And it felt like there was an I had it kind of had an expiration date. And I kind of looked around. I was like, crab, you know, I want to have kids. I want to have a family. And Garen very nonchalantly said to me, He's like, Well, we can't have kids. And I said, What do you mean? He's like, We can't have kids when you're in this energy. Your health is deteriorating, your hair's falling out. You don't have time. He's like, You are in such a different universe when you are when business blairs.

SPEAKER_08 36:15

I remember the look you had on your face when I said that. That's true.

SPEAKER_00 36:18

Don't tell me what I can't. Right. Don't tell me what I can't do. Now I'm gonna work harder. I'm gonna do, I could build this business and be a mom. I could build this business and have babies. And so there there was no room for him. There was no room for Garen. And then I had to really have a solid conversation with myself. I said, oh my gosh, I don't believe that I'm worthy of love or I the level of significance that I have with my husband or even with myself if I'm not achieving, if I'm not creating, and if I don't have this well, would I be lovable? Would I love myself? And would he love me if I wasn't a boss babe? If I didn't generate this income? And that was a really confronting question that I had for myself. Because although it had created my life, it then became my identity. Instead of me having power over it, it had such power over me. Versus, oh my gosh, can I go to the source and would you still love me if I didn't make this money? Would you take care of me if I didn't have a business anymore? You know, and bless his soul, he said, I would love you more. Because it's never for him and I, and back to your original question, it's for our love, it was never about the money. And in my unconscious mind, I thought that by being successful and having the body and having the finances and achieving all these things, it would make me such a desirable partner. And then who am I actually really if I didn't do those things? Would I still be lovable? And that's where I had to start removing all these things that I put on myself and be like, who is Blair at her essence? Who is Blair at her core? Who am I? And that was that was the very start of me starting to peel back and being really clear on Blair leads the show. And everything else is a result or an overflow of my essence versus let me be all the, let me do all those things, therefore I'm worthy of having everything that I have, versus I am worthy now because of my essence, and all that will come. It's a nuance shift, and I had to get really clear on that. And gratefully so, the last three years, I would say from 2022-ish till now, I really went in that place of I didn't, what is my business? What is my identity? Who am I now that I'm a mom of two? Who am I still a boss? I had to go through an internal shift. And I will say there's a book called The Second Mountain, and it talks about the first mountain is all about achievement and uh external validation and what you've created and what you're doing. And the second mountain is about actually true, like going for things with true internal, like intrinsic desire that I'm I'm the way in which he's always led was I'm doing this from my heart, not from what it will generate. I'm doing it from joy, I'm doing it from wisdom, and I will never sacrifice the things that I sacrificed before to go create and achieve what I'm going out to do. And this second mountain that I'm in, this place and creation, this authenticity that I feel in my body is from the place of not proving, not showing the world, you know, fuck you, worlds. You didn't think I was gonna make it, you didn't think I was good enough, screw you, mom and dad, who are you? It's not from that place at all.

SPEAKER_05 39:46

I just really love the intention that is put behind every aspect of your life. As we interview so many people and we have conversations with so many people, our minds are expanding, we're learning so much. And the one thing that everyone has in common that's an expert or that's doing really well and that's happy and fulfilled, is that they're really very intentional everything. There is no random in your life. I don't mean that in an arrogant I did this way. I mean it in a way of you have consciously co-created your reality, and your reality is a result of your intentionality. This is like we're both equally powerful. I can only imagine the household your kids get to grow up in.

SPEAKER_08 40:39

It's one we never got.

SPEAKER_05 40:41

Exactly. Exactly.

SPEAKER_08 40:43

Our three-year-old has the processing speed of like a 10-year-old, and sometimes I forget. And the one thing I just want to mention when somebody makes something look easy, it's because they put a got a lot of reps in.

SPEAKER_00 40:58

A lot more reps in.

SPEAKER_08 40:59

So it is very, very, very difficult, but it is worth it. And I think the two main ingredients, the two main ingredients of why we can harness two powerful people, and sometimes it's like you take two battling rams, it's like boom, and then we always come back to the center, is both of us had crazy pests that we overcame. And anytime you can overcome that much resistance, you just got extra stamina. It's like somebody who can run a marathon versus someone who's never ran from here to one mile. You just got a stronger base.

SPEAKER_01 41:39

Yep.

SPEAKER_08 41:40

And our continuous pursuit. Now, this is part of our marriage vowels to continuously keep growing. And when I say that, I really mean that. And she does too. So book this course this, and it's the continuous growth. The moment somebody's like, I don't need to grow, I can tell you what's gonna happen two years from now, especially if somebody's in fifth grade and they're together, and then someone goes to the next grade, next grade, next grade, that's the gap. But when two partners are adamant about continuous growth, you're just gonna keep meeting each other at a level. It might be a little ahead, it might be a little behind, but it's that, it's that just like I'm gonna figure it out. I'm gonna, this is my promise, this is my devotion, this is my commitment. And that's something we both have in our own way.

SPEAKER_06 42:30

That is exactly what connected us as well. And it takes it takes a certain level of love and respect to understand that both partners can grow in their own worlds, right? Because it's not like you have to grow parallel with the same goals and the same thoughts and expansion, but rather something's going to be like it didn't work. Exactly. Yeah, did not work.

SPEAKER_03 42:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_06 42:53

So I we resonate with this so much because we even had a running joke when we first started dating that one of us is gonna outgrow each other. We had this little competition you mentioned that you had the competition. We also had like a little oh, you think you're gonna grow faster than me? No chance. So we had this experience. I would love to ask you how you two actually came to be together and how you met. It's a very cute story, I wanna hear it. But before that, I have a thought a little political, but I would love to hear from the both of you about this. Because hearing you speak made me think. And it made me think a little bit of the shift in our world when it comes to the what it means to be a feminist. Over the years, what happened to the feminist movement is that women started thinking that they will be more empowered if they are more like men. Into disempowerment, yeah. So not take on all. The real core qualities of a woman and that makes me a feminist, but rather do what men do and that makes me free. What do you think about that statement? And how do you think it is shaping the women of today who perhaps have in the mind that the best life they can live is the life of pursuing career and making money and not following this whole concept of starting a family. I want to be my own boss. How what is the pros and cons of that mentality?

SPEAKER_08 44:35

It's a really good question. I'm excited to answer it after Blair.

SPEAKER_00 44:38

Well, it's interesting because I think a lot of my mentors, I would say that I looked to inside of business were men, which Gary V and Grant Cardone and Eric Thomas and all these, you know, you gotta, you gotta wanna be successful more than you gotta wanna breathe more than you wanna breathe. Like, I mean, I really took on this mentality to create what I want to create because there wasn't a lot of in my that I knew or was aware of examples of women doing it another way. And so I didn't know if I had healthy examples to show me you can be in love, you can be pregnant, you can do this in a way that you can have it all. And so I just didn't know another example. And so I had just consciously or unconsciously taken on these traits to do and create what I created until it was to a point where my health was on the line, which is funny because I'm in a health and wellness business. Now I'm very confronted and I'm sacrificing my own self to create wealth at the expense of. And I didn't know there was another way. And so the feminist movement, I'm so grateful for them because I think they had to be so radical in order to create change. So I have the immense amount of gratitude. And then somewhere along the lines, I think the pendulum got swung so far that it was demasculating the man, as if we didn't need them and that they right, and that was really my own mentality. And that mentality was then at the expense of my own relationship. I don't need you, I make more money than you, I can make as much money. Oh, and I can have a baby, and I can birth a baby, and I can build a business. You can't do that. And so it was like, what was what was Garen needed for? Then back to my statement, one can take a thousand to flight, but two can take ten thousand. And I didn't understand the importance of which the masculine and feminine, the polarity that the dance that we can have with each other can be so much powerful. I can actually be more powerful in my surrender than I can be in my pursuit. I can be more powerful being the one that can gently guide and he goes and executes. You know, I take a lot of pride in the things that Garen's the most successful at, the clients that he lands, the opportunities that he gets, is because of a guiding whisper that I'm like, you should go to Phoenix.

SPEAKER_08 47:13

And I wasn't gonna go.

SPEAKER_00 47:14

You should go to this party. Hey, I was thinking about this person. You should call this client. And to his credit, he listens. That's a big part as well. He listens. And so when he lands a$250,000 client from a party that I suggest that he go to to go network, I'm like, baby, guess what?

SPEAKER_08 47:35

And it happens all the time.

SPEAKER_00 47:36

And he's at the of course, he's the face. That's the one that people see, that's the one that's recognized, he's the man. And I just quietly have a lot of freaking enjoyment that I am actually the reason. And but we are the reason. Yeah. And so there had to be an overcoming of the feminist within me. That's like, what am I proving? There was a mentor of ours that talks about there's two rays of light. Essentially, she talks about how the first ray of light is the masculine. It's the pursuit, it's the do, it's the creator, it's the con, it's the doer. In the story, the parable, it's Jesus. He's the one that's out doing creative, he's the face. The second ray of light is the love and wisdom. It's the one that has no ego, but she that's the ray of light that amplifies the first. And in the parable, it's Mary Magdalene, and she's actually the one that activates Jesus to be who he was. And that she will with love and wisdom, there is no ego. So can she be in such internal pride and enjoyment that she is the reason that he was able to go out and do? And I really had to learn that because that ray of light actually is what's gonna bring the generational wealth. It's gonna bring a level of to me success or opportunity that I could not individually create and that he couldn't individually create. But it's the we in that. And to me, that's so much more beautiful in the feminine because I am so powerful in my own right, but also powerful in my suggestion, which then he goes, Oh, I respect that. I see that, I recognize that. And let me humble myself that she might not see something, and I can execute in a way that she couldn't. And can we see that together we're the ones that make the whole?

SPEAKER_06 49:20

I love it. It's so important. This must ring so true to you. Like I'm just like they they say they say behind every man's success is a woman. But the way I see it is like it you said whisper in his ear. In order to whisper in someone's ear, especially when you're this tall, you don't go behind him, you go beside him. Yeah. Yeah. Right? And that's exactly how so many. That's why I think for men it's so important to to say these things. Because sometimes men feel like, you know, it belittle b belittles them because they say she helped me with it. But it's so important for people to hear the stories. I am very proud of how much Sonia did in my life. I would never be where I am in my life if it wasn't for her. And I experienced, both of us experienced, and I had to see it from the side, and she made me realize because similarly to you, I get recognized. I'm the face of our achievements. I have seen so many things. People would step over her, push her aside to get to me. We had experiences like this. I had to learn to see how people can look me in the eyes and not even acknowledge that she's standing next to me. But she's 50% of what I am when it comes to the business and achievements.

SPEAKER_00 50:39

The biggest enjoyment though is when people go, I see Garen, but let me tell, let me I want to talk to Blair. And then that's I was like, it to me, it's just a filter. Yes. And I'm always like, Great, you go right ahead. You want to actually would you like me to introduce you to my husband? I've been called Garen's assistant, Garen's wife. People don't remember me. I really get it. And I really I'm humbled. They're not my people.

SPEAKER_04 51:01

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 51:02

But those who know know. And so then it's like, and I have, and I really it just it makes my life actually easier when people can see that. And it's like, no problem. And no fault to their own. I get it. He's a glittering shiny lantern. You too, Fabio. Like, let's go.

SPEAKER_03 51:17

Fabio.

SPEAKER_00 51:19

Yes. And so then, and then it's like, okay, great. And then then when they sit and they talk to me, they're like, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa. This is a whole new game. And I was like, exactly. And then to me, I think it's just the wisdom of the Council of Women that it's just like we just figured out a different a different part of the game that we get to play.

SPEAKER_05 51:37

To add to that, I think at that point when that was happening a lot, because it was triggering me so much. All my wounds of not being seen were coming out big time. And I think the difference, it's so funny because that used to happen so much more than it does today. And today, when it happens, it doesn't touch me the way it used to, because it's one thing that people don't see me, and it's another thing that I don't see myself because they don't see me. Or I let them define my worth because we were in a business meeting and someone didn't look at me or didn't give me the time of the day. It is a filter. It literally is a filter. It happened to us recently. We were in Dubai, and someone that I met, like I just knew the woman, and she brought her partner, and we had like a double date, and I was confused as hell.

SPEAKER_06 52:29

I'm just ending up there.

SPEAKER_05 52:30

And I thought, you know, a friend of mine's like, oh, maybe we should have a double date. It was like nothing. So yeah, sure, let's meet. We we started spending a little bit more time there, so we're like, okay. And so we met, and it became pretty clear in like the first 10 minutes of this meeting that it was not a friendly meeting. It was a business meeting. And I I didn't get the memo. I thought we were here to connect as people. But we were not here to commit com connect as people. We were we were here to network, and it was really uncomfortable. It was uncomfortable for me. It was uncomfortable, especially for me.

SPEAKER_06 53:03

They were networking to me and barely acknowledging her. And I always like to balance the room. So I shift the conversation. Oh, you know, Sonia does this, and I I think that's her friend. So why am I explaining this?

SPEAKER_05 53:15

Right. It was weird. It was weird, but it was also funny because in this moment, I got to see my shit. I got to see how do I react to this? How have I evolved? Because in the past, how much would this affect me? Versus how is it affecting me today? And so there is definitely that self-filteration that's happening, and I'm very grateful for it. And at the same time, it's allowed me to use that as fuel to really look within and be like, where am I not feeling worthy enough?

SPEAKER_00 53:47

I call it the alley oop when we're in those situations. And I'm just like, I find I try to find an opening to how to like not to give my husband the opening that he's gonna hit a home run. And we get in the car, and I was like, I set you up so good. He's like, You set me up so good. And I was like, I'll be the ultimate wingman. I'll be the ultimate wingwoman for my husband because if he wins, we win.

SPEAKER_04 54:11

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 54:11

I was like, it's the same scoreboard, baby. Don't care. Like it is coming to the same house. And so that and then we get to celebrate. And so I try to find openings in ways in which I can continue to elevate him. And I love Garen will do that too. And I just said to him one day, I was like, you don't need to do that. I feel so worthy when you, when they get to see and they pedestal you, I'm your wife, you know. I so I feel I have such pride in them seeing that in you. And so I don't see what try to turn it back or tell me how great I was or try to sh share the spotlight. I was like, I don't need the spotlight. You take it all, baby, and you look really good in it. And it's actually more common. You know, so it's and it's so natural for him, and I only amplify and give, and it's so natural for me to be the assist.

SPEAKER_05 54:59

Does that make sense? Yeah. It makes perfect sense, and it's actually really, really beautiful that you just know you're so secure in yourself that that doesn't affect you.

SPEAKER_06 55:08

It must be so empowering and healing for women to hear this honestly. It's so powerful. You are quite passionate about the feminism. What do you have to say?

SPEAKER_08 55:20

Because I can see what happens when Blair is in her being, not her doing. And there's something about when she doesn't have to prove something, and there's an energy and all these magical things start happening. Because women were forced, there wasn't an option. If you're a woman, you're forced to come up in an unhealthy man's world. So if that's your grandmother's, grandmothers, grandmothers, grandmothers, grandmothers, grandmothers, grandmothers, the epigenetics passes right through the DNA coding of that frequency and that energy. So if you take that and I'm just imagining that the true, the true before they came up with the word kings, but the person in like true power was the woman. She could give birth, and there's all this. I watched my wife give birth, and I was like, yo, if I was insecure, I would because that's a lot of power. I watched my uh my wife's eyes turn into like a tiger. It was crazy. I'm like, what? There was a different level of power when she turned in her to her primal state. And I was like, I don't, whatever that is, is a billion times more powerful than anything that I could do. If I was insecure, uh I would I would be like, well, that's too powerful. And what insecure people do is they stuff down true power and then they mask it with false power. I know that was done to women. That's why they didn't have voters' rights, they didn't have all these other things. And then if you have a woman confused about who she really is, king, and then created a word called queen and have every woman underneath my man, and you said beside, you actually don't know what a woman is. And the base way I can, best way I can describe that is the woman reminds me of the ocean. We've only discovered seven, 0.7%. But what's that powerful, it will smush a submarine in in 0.1 seconds. A woman don't even know that of her power because she's had to come up in this brainwashed society. So if you come up confused, now you got women want to be men and men want to be women because nobody knows the true origin of how power in infinity works. So if you got all generations going like this, you just got a bunch of confused people. So what I feel is that energy comes from the woman wanting to be seen and heard so much, and the man, unhealthy man on top of that, didn't give it. So she found a way. But she found a way being taught from the unhealthy masculine birth feminist movement, not people standing for their rights, you gotta understand the energy behind it. I look at your energy, I watch the veins in your neck, I watch that red skin, I know that's not healthy. But if you hold your breath for four minutes, you cut off the flow of nature. It's gonna come out that way. And so to close out the conversation, my jaw in 2015 was this big because it was infected, and I went to the dentist and they said, You gotta get a root canal. I said, I already had one. They said, Whoever originally did the root canal didn't get it all the way to the root. So it's been building years of infection, and so what's showing up on the surface is because at the core it's rotten. So at the core of women coming through, it was through a rotten filter. And that's what I feel. But what I'm learning is when she came to me in a different kind of energy, and I was like, yo, but all these powerful things are happening. When I watched her give birth, I was like, there's something here that is, and there's nothing she's doing. It's in the divine magic of her being. Now you can do through your being, but if you're trying to to to do to make be, it's it's off. And so I think that is the case. Everybody's confused about who everybody is. It was like, that's not a real man, but meanwhile, you try to be a real man, 78% of all suicides come from people trying to be a real man. That's off too. And I think that what we're learning is we've been lied to since the beginning of time. And we get to define what a real man is. But it's gonna be different for different people because we got a different makeup. And so uh I I think nobody has the answer, but I can just look at history and see why the surface looks the way that it looks.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:30

We learn as we go. And what serves so well your argument is you mentioning Mary Magdalene. We know so little about her, right?

SPEAKER_05 1:00:39

Now she's completely been villain. Yes.

SPEAKER_08 1:00:45

Read the Ethiopian Bible and find those four books that were deliberately taken out, yeah. And you'll find the book of Mary Magdalene in there and the book of Enoch.

SPEAKER_06 1:00:55

And it's so easy to connect this like logically, outside of outside of trying to be oh, this is the power of women and so on, just for someone who doesn't connect emotionally or spiritually to things, like the logical fact is that something so powerful has been taken out from the messaging in order to affect women and lose their power.

unknown 1:01:19

Right.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:19

That's how powerful it was. That's how powerful it was. That we needed to rip it away.

SPEAKER_08 1:01:24

Yeah. And one thing I I want to share to even back up that logic is anybody that would paint Jesus white with blonde hair, blue eyes, but it literally says bronze skin and hair like lamb's wool. Lamb's wool is my hair. You know they're shaping something. Anybody that will have history books and public education where you have only two black people and an entire book and a five-year-old me saying, Hey, mom, I wish I was white. And she's like, Why would you say that? I was like, because they're the only ones that's done anything good in this world, because I'm reading this book. So anybody who would try to shape a false narrative and brainwash little children will lie to you about women.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:16

Wow, you said that to your mom.

SPEAKER_08 1:02:18

100%. So I'm just like, I I I I call your BS and I'm looking and I'm like, that's a lie. That is a lie, and I'm not gonna look at women as prostitutes. How dare you do that?

SPEAKER_07 1:02:34

How dare you do that? Basically, I'm calling out King James.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:44

You need to write a distruct.

SPEAKER_08 1:02:46

Well, well, if it well, because that's that that was the Bible that's pushed in Western culture as the best one to read.

SPEAKER_06 1:02:52

It's shaped it's shaped over the years in order to control. Control, and it's so obvious. We would love to ask you, how did you meet? Your first date.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:03

I had wrote uh, you know, cheesily, I'm like 26, wrote all these things of what I wanted a man and one up on my head, put like he's gotta have mad shoe game. And I showed this list to Garen after we were together. He's like, You manifested a black man, and I was like, What do you mean? And he was like, No, my guy, no offense as a mad shoe game. And I was like, ah, anyway, but that's a small story. Um the I was 28 for those into astrology. Funny that we went from Earl Legend to astrology. Um I was going through my Saturn return and I was very, I was in the best shape of my life, making the most money I'd ever made. I was married to someone else at the time, and I was so confused on who I was. Called a quarter life crisis. And I went to a personal development seminar, and I walked into that seminar and I told no one I was going. I told my assistant. Um, and I just told people I was going to LA because I I need to go I needed to take a I need to take a vacation by myself. And I told my assistant I was going to the seminar, and I walk in and Garen saw me there. And we knew who each other were because of the industry that we're in, but we didn't know each other. And so I was like, What are you doing here? And he's like, I just graduated from the program. I graduated from the program and I was a serving at the door. He was being in he was welcoming the new people in. And I'm walking into what he just graduated from. And he and he's like, What are you doing here? And I'm like, I'm taking the course. And so Garen had checked in with me throughout the course was five days, and he kept checking in with me because no one knew I was there. And at this point, I I had not I I told him everything. I had nothing to really hide. There was no, I'd tell him my stab story. I told him my pain. I told the skeletons in the closet because I wasn't playing the like me, like me game. It was very authentic. And he just kept checking in on me. Fast forward, uh, I get done with the course, I fly home, I tell my then husband that I want to be friends. We file for divorce and I go back and I finish the rest of the course. It was like a three-month-long curriculum. And through that journey, Garen and I just became friends. And at the end of it, um, Garen had FaceTime me and I just shared with him, you know, I just, I just want to thank you for being my friend and walking this walk with me for the last three months and being my friend. And um yeah, I did I just really acknowledged him. And at the end of it, he's like, What do you want in this world? I said, I want to be free, I want to be unapologetic, I want to travel the world. Uh, I just I want to bring joy. And I was like, and I want to date someone like you. He's like, someone like me. And I'm like, yeah, someone say, someone like me? And I said, Yeah, someone like you, someone who is totally free, uh unapologetically themselves, loves to travel, makes a bunch of money, has a ton of fun. And he said it again. He goes, So you want to date someone like me? And I said, No, I want to date you. And he said, What? And I hung up.

SPEAKER_05 1:05:57

I didn't know that.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:58

And I didn't know you hung up. And I hung up the phone and the next day he texted me. He's like, should we talk about this? Did you just freak out? I freaked out. You didn't plan it, just came out. Just came out. And then I text him back. I said, sure. And I said, you know, has anyone ever asked you on a team?

SPEAKER_08 1:06:13

But this is when you were speaking, about to go on stage, right?

SPEAKER_00 1:06:15

I was about to go on stage. I was behind stage. I was mic'd up. I was about to go speak in front of like 2,000 people. And I had like threw the little girl, the girl, my liais on the phone, and she's like, What just happened? And then they're like, Blair Murphy to the stage. And I like to go back to the case. What am I doing? So the next day I text him and I and he's like, Well, should we talk about this? That was his words. And I said, you know, has anyone ever asked you on a date before? He goes, I live in LA. Girls on here don't ask guys like me on a date. And then I was like, okay. And so he calls me and I was like, Karen Jones, will you go on a date with me? And he goes, Can I just get clear on what's a date? And I was like, You're that's a great question. And I was like, I think I take you out to eat and I pay for it. And he goes, Okay, so are we dating? And I was like, ah, I think that's plural. Uh and he goes, Okay, well, what if we like the date? And I was like, Well, maybe you asked me on a date. It was so cute. I'm like, what am I? I'm 30, I'm 20, 29 now at the time. And he's 39. And we're discussing what dating is. It was so cute.

SPEAKER_08 1:07:19

Let me give I just because they're gonna want this context. Because I went hiking with the person just to go hiking. And all of a sudden, three people are like, Oh, I know you. You're dating my friend. I was like, who? The person who I went hiking on. I was like, hold on, that's a different version of dating because there's no part of me. So I needed to gain clarity on what dating.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:41

So we were laying the context. And then he's like, So are you my girlfriend? And I was like, no, I think it's just a date. And he's like, Well, what if I already know you want I want you to be my girlfriend? And I was like, I think you ask. And then right. And then he's like, you know, Blair Murphy, will you be my girlfriend? I was like, yes. So I flew from, I was living in Colorado at the time. I flew from Colorado to LA and take him on the date to Mr. Chow's. I pay for it. Because that was my date. And but I at this time I was already his girlfriend because he had asked me to be his girlfriend.

SPEAKER_08 1:08:11

And then it was dark in there. The lights were low.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:14

And we were and we were sitting at this huge round table and they set us across from each other. So he picks up his chair and he comes and sits right next to me. So we're right next to each other the whole date. And then he just picks up his chair and he picks up my chair, and we're directly face to face. And he looks at me, he finishes chewing, he puts his spoon down and he goes, I could see you as my wife and the mother of our children one day. And he sits back up and he goes back to eating. And the way in which he told me it was not for my response. It was like he felt it so intensely that he just needed to tell me. And it didn't matter what my response is, and he wasn't looking for a response. It was just like you stopping someone in the airport and like, you are so beautiful. And it was almost if he was telling me for his enjoyment. And I got up off the table and I call my assistant because she's the only one that knows I'm there. Because she books all my travel. And I was like, okay, this guy, he tells me that I he could see me as his wife and the mother of his children. I don't know what to say. And she goes, You say thank you. And I said, Okay. And I go back and I was like, Thank you so much. Because I didn't know what to say. You know, I'm to this radical shift in my life. Recently divorced. I don't know who I am. I'm in this identity crisis again. And I was like, What am I doing? I can't trust myself. Yet I my soul wanted him, but my head was like, This is crazy. And then that was December of 2018. And then June of 2019, we were engaged. In October of 2019, we were married. Wow. Yeah. So we that was clear. I'm like, we asked each other on a date. We became boyfriend and girlfriend.

SPEAKER_08 1:09:54

How did you know? I never ever saw myself being married in my life. I never saw myself having other kids. I never, I never had a vision of that. I was just like, I had cheated on every girlfriend that I'd ever had because of my like little boy wounds, that it's like a bottomless, a bottomless pit. I didn't know that at the time. And it was something about Blair that every time we spoke, even when she would text me, they would be like, I was like, what was that? It was every single time. And that was just energy. And she'd get on a call and be like, What are you doing? I'm like, and that thing, I could not explain what that was.

SPEAKER_05 1:10:38

And it was the first time you felt it.

SPEAKER_08 1:10:40

Oh, absolutely. But it was just like, you know, I'm like, I got a really cool friend that sees me, that acknowledges me for any level of effort that I try and things. And it just felt good because I grew up in a household where people didn't see me. So I tend to lean towards people who like bring them to the surface. I saw you try that. I saw you. And there's something about that that nurtures a part of me in something I never got as a child. And so I experienced like a flower growing in real time instead of trying to pull the flower out of the ground fast. I'm going to back that up a bit. Three years prior, I was trying to have a get a relationship with my daughter. I have a daughter who's about to be 24, December 6th, uh, Kylia, extraordinary human. And a relationship on and off. And I just couldn't figure that one out. I just couldn't, because the part of her when she was born, I was like homeless living in my car. And so there's some stuff there. And I started doing interpersonal work, emotional intelligence work, darkness work, silence work. And every course I went to is with the intention of learning what is it about me that my daughter doesn't trust? Well, as I started coming more and more in awareness, my relationship with my mom started changing. I'm like, I'm going there for with my daughter. Why is my relationship with my mom changing? And all these women around me relationships started changing. And then coming out of this darkness, darkness, I mean a silent retreat, this guy, Steve, said, You're a good-looking guy. It's safe to say you can get any girl you want. And I said, Yep. He said, get a date with your daughter. Because at that time, he had been to several courses with me and I kept saying the same thing with no change. He said, get a date with your daughter. And I was like, I've never pursued her. Matter of fact, I've never pursued a woman in my life. I've never even really been touched by one because my mother wasn't an affectionate woman. So that's why I crave touch, because that's what I always wanted as a child. And I never, so if you, if you never got pursued, you don't even know what it's like to pursue someone. And then I created a different identity. And like how we were talking about identity earlier, how you see yourself. And I said, instead of being this like weak person, oh, I hope she sees that I've changed. I said, I am the most powerful representation of who my daughter will marry one day, with no example of that in a man in my entire life. I didn't even have an example. So I got to make it up in my head. The moment I had that identity, all of a sudden all these relationships with their women start changing with their dads. And I'm not even talking to the women based off of something that they're seeing in me, but I don't know. I just know that I am the most powerful representation of who my daughter will marry one day. So I started seeing women through the eyes of my daughter, not the eyes of my dad. And I started pursuing a relationship with my daughter, no matter how many times, don't call me, don't call me. I'm like, I'm gonna call anyways, I'm gonna show up anyways, I'm gonna show up anyways, because I didn't know that it didn't mean, I didn't know what pain or sadness sounded like. Show up anyways. And in the showing up, that's me taking the courses of the emotional intelligence course. And I love that course so much because during that time, my daughter came back into my life. She's like, Daddy, you're different. And all these women's relationship with their dads changed based off of who they saw in me. I'm like, that's weird. In that course that I graduated from, that's when I met Blair through the doorway of free service. Sound familiar? I was doing something that I love for free when I was working people out. The very next opportunity was to exercise the very thing that I had just been doing with my daughter. So it's I feel that God blessed me with this person in my life and this energy. Then when she asked me for on a date, when I looked at Blair, I it was like a portal opened up. I saw something I never saw before in my life, which is a future. And I saw it, and I believed so much in what that was, that if she would have said no, it did not matter. Because what mattered is when I said, I'm the most powerful representation of who my daughter will be one day, and I saw it, and then God said, Now you're ready for your next level.

SPEAKER_07 1:15:48

And then a wife, a mother, a friend, a confidant, so all of that came to fruition.

SPEAKER_08 1:15:58

Then I looked at my list, I wrote a list of 62 attributes three years prior. 62. 62.

SPEAKER_06 1:16:08

That's a lot.

SPEAKER_08 1:16:10

That list somehow brought my greatest test of my daughter in my life.

SPEAKER_07 1:16:15

When my heart opened, that's when Blair came into my life. And this one has all 62 that I wrote down.

SPEAKER_05 1:16:25

Do you have that list?

SPEAKER_08 1:16:27

I do have the list. It's somewhere in all in all the journals. But I know what I put on there, makes her own money, but loves being taken care of. Great hygiene. I was never color specific. I was just, there's a certain, there's a certain thing. It's like personal growth.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:45

Exotic. And I was like, blonde hair, blue eyes from a farm is super exotic.

SPEAKER_08 1:16:50

And so I but I I said exotic, you gotta understand to a black.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:57

I am exotic. I get it.

SPEAKER_08 1:17:00

You could not have written it. You couldn't have written it out like that. And so when I'm looking at all this list, I'm like, oh, that's the thing that was going, so it's like the future that I wrote down that I thought was virtually impossible, checking itself off vibrationally inside.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:21

In the top three places, and in there, he that he wrote down the top three places that he would meet this person, and the first one was at a personal development seminar. Personal development course.

SPEAKER_05 1:17:30

You even decided where you would meet her. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:34

That's so beautiful. Wow. That's not a common. Wow. That part was wild. That was wild.

SPEAKER_06 1:17:40

We had a guest, his name is Charlie Rocket, and when you were speaking, he said something that resonated so deeply with what you did. He said that we as humans nowadays have been hurt, so our heart slowly is like a phone that you put on do not disturb. And when you're when your heart is on either silence or do not disturb, when something appears in front of you, you don't see it. But your heart was so open when she arrived in your life, they was like, I'm ready.

SPEAKER_08 1:18:12

And they've never been open like that before.

SPEAKER_06 1:18:14

And that is that is huge power. And you spoke about fatherhood. I think you probably felt like right here with you.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:25

Keep it together, keep it together, keep it together.

SPEAKER_08 1:18:27

Or not, because that might just clear the field. Not only for you for but for a lot of people.

SPEAKER_05 1:18:35

There's just um not many examples of fathers coming back. I think there's so many even men and women whose dads abandoned them. And I've always wondered what it would be like if my father chose me. Even if he didn't choose me in my childhood. What would it have been like if he came back later? You know? What it would have been like if he changed and wanted to make amends. Yeah. And you saying that was healing because I don't hear that. You know, dads don't come back and make amends. They're just and and I know because I've very briefly spoken to my father, and it's never unfortunately been a good interaction. It's always left more scars. But he has said the words, you know. I'm like, I wish I hadn't done that. And then it just it just ends there. I wish I hadn't done that. And then what? Like we have, we have today until I die. We have today until you die. Then what?

SPEAKER_03 1:19:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:43

I wish I hadn't done that, but I am doing that every single day since I left as you were a kid. I'm continuing to be the father that abandoned you every single day since then. Right? And you came in and you corrected that. You pursued your daughter. You politely ignored her nose because you wanted to have occupy space in her life. You did that. Why? How?

SPEAKER_08 1:20:13

I saw 20-something women relationships with their jet dads magically change without them talking to their dads. And I'm like, hold did it make sense. And I'll just I I'll take it even further. There's a lady from an Indian culture where men don't even operate a certain way, like taking their daughter on a date. Dad lives in India, hasn't spoken to her, hadn't spoken to her daughter in seven, eight years. The week I took my daughter on a date, because I was verbal about I get to take my daughter on a date. He calls her out of nowhere and asks her on a date. And they hadn't spoken in seven years. And so what that taught me is there's something about the suggestive imprinting of a woman. If she can see a different picture and drive that vibrational being energy in the direction of that picture, she can change reality. I I watched it happen. I didn't know what was happening at that time until I'm, you know, 15 years removed from that, and I've learned how to articulate what that was. And this is what I was speaking about earlier. When you hypnotize a woman since the beginning of time of knowing who she is, she'll never really know her true powers. It isn't anything that she does. If you can like really channel that thought, even you right now, imagine me being your dad.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:59

That's why it was healing.

SPEAKER_08 1:22:00

This is what I'm saying.

SPEAKER_04 1:22:01

That is literally what was happening.

SPEAKER_08 1:22:03

And so if you can imagine the way I'm talking from the little girl inside, especially when we leave here and then you go. Matter of fact, are you open to doing uh I'm down?

SPEAKER_02 1:22:16

Um I'm gonna invite you to close your eyes.

SPEAKER_08 1:22:28

And if it feels good for you, I'm gonna invite you to just go to a place inside of the little girl version of you that deeply desires connection, continuous connection with her father. And if tears want to come out, tears from that place in a safe space are welcome and you're safe, and you're not alone. You're with three people who can hold for her. And just allow that energy to come in your body and just the sensation of daddy, I really, really, really want to connect with you. Now I want you to imagine the day that your father was born before you met him. You don't have a relationship with this version of him, and I want you to imagine that that little girl is at his birthbed, and you are the first soul that he comes in contact with, and you are there to teach him what love looks and feels like. Now, this isn't the dad you know, this is the newborn baby, and the first imprinting is what shapes his love. I want you to imagine picking up that baby and bringing him into your womb space and allowing him to melt with that feeling of just deep nurtured love inside of your body and just feel that love. All you gotta do is feel it. Now I want you to imagine the version of me that was talking because a spirit can use anybody that they want to communicate a message in the astral field. I want you to imagine your dad is using me right now because whatever brokenness does not have the capacity, but in his oversoul, and everything that you heard is who he truly is beyond the brokenness, and if you could bring that into that same womb, where that newborn baby was just born, and you can love deeply and accept you for who you really are, and allow that to overflow in your mind, body, soul, heart, and spirit, and take three deep breaths.

SPEAKER_07 1:25:52

Two more.

SPEAKER_08 1:26:02

One more. Now with your both your hands on your heart, eyes still closed, without moving or making a sound. I want you to say these words. I am healed. No words coming out of your mouth, but still say it. I am healed. I am whole. I am well. Thank you, Dad, for teaching me how to love no matter what. I forgive you wholeheartedly, and I'm powerfully choosing to set you free. I deserve to be happy. I am infinite happiness. Now notice you didn't move your mouth. You didn't say anything, but someone said something.

SPEAKER_07 1:27:28

Who said that? Who heard that? That version of you just needed permission and guidance.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:39

And blink your eyes back home now.

SPEAKER_05 1:28:00

Like I just feel light both in the sense of weight and in the sense of light like texture, like color.

SPEAKER_07 1:28:07

What color?

SPEAKER_05 1:28:09

White.

SPEAKER_08 1:28:10

And the hot air balloon can't leave the ground unless you release the weight.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_07 1:28:18

Feel light. I feel like I'm so a few things.

SPEAKER_08 1:28:24

You moved quite a bit of energy. So as soon as you can, just get cold water on your head and get your feet into the earth. That's number one. And number two, because you created that imprint, I want you to start paying attention to the fractals of these divine coincidences that seem like they come out of nowhere.

SPEAKER_07 1:28:49

And don't be shocked. It's it's it's the current.

SPEAKER_08 1:28:56

It's how the the current wants to flow based off of what you choose to see vibrationally. And as they start to come in, it's almost, I receive this moment. Because the energy in which you receive it determines on if it's going to open up its portal of possibility even more. So if you're in receivership, I receive this moment, I receive this moment, you'll see these multidimensional puzzle pieces based off of what you chose to saw, see. Then you'll look up a year later and it will be in direct correlation to the seed that you planted just now.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:36

Thank you.

SPEAKER_08 1:29:36

You're so very welcome.

SPEAKER_01 1:29:38

Thank you.

SPEAKER_05 1:29:39

And I hope that anyone listening that has a similar story can take themselves through this because I know it's a transmission. I know it's not just words. So I really encourage anyone, like man or woman, to go through this.

SPEAKER_08 1:29:56

It's beautiful. I really acknowledge you for just putting yourself there. That that in itself, people wouldn't do that on a podcast. And I always know when sometimes when people ask a question, I know why they're asking the question. And so the fact that you were like, I'm asking the question, and I'm gonna put myself out there because I know this is very important for me. So thank you for just allowing that space. That in itself is gonna support so many people.

SPEAKER_06 1:30:26

Your heart is open.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:28

Oh yeah. I'm I'm humbled always. Thank you.

SPEAKER_06 1:30:34

And you are such a role model. Because before I say it, I want to be clear. Like I don't know what your relationship with your father is like, but for the three of us, we have the same story. And so I don't want to give it a color of skin. Yeah. But for you to be in the position you're at while knowing the statistics in the United States of how many black fathers actually leave their families, it's a it's an extra layer of how much of a healing role model you can be. It's so powerful.

SPEAKER_08 1:31:15

Thank you for sharing that. And it's just one layer I want to add, it's the black fathers leaving the family. There's like a it's really layered, and then there's a pressure cooker, and there's a lot of propaganda that feeds in the to the minds of things like that, that'll be like, oh, the black father left, but like you can see why prison is the way that it is. There's a I mean, there's a layered you can watch what's going on right now, even with the the whole Charlie Kirk thing, and and then the lady who got uh murdered by the black man. And I just really want to talk about this because the lady who got stabbed by the black man got stabbed two weeks prior, and then they put it out two weeks later. And I'm like, wait, why are they putting it out? I was like, something's about to happen. An hour later, Charlie Kirk gets shot. And I was like, I guarantee you the media is gonna be something about black, Muslims, transgenders, all these different things. And so because I'm a marketer, I know how targeted ads work. And so they're targeting Christian high values for Charlie Kirk, and then they're and they're targeting black people, black and brown people, all of the racially motivated things he said about black people. And so now, even though it wasn't a black person who shot Charlie, now black and whites, it's black and white, uh, black versus white, again, Muslims versus Christians, left versus right, um, all this thing, but the media governs all of that. And because I know how this thing spins, the reason why Michael Jackson and Lionel Ritchie wrote We Are the World. If you see what was if you see what was going on at that time in America, it was almost identical imprint. And so that play also plays into the role of how many men aren't in the house. It's that type of stuff. And I will tell you, and this is important that I share this, I called it as soon as it happened, and all of a sudden I'm just walking down the street, and the white lady goes, You F nigger. I hadn't heard that since I was five. And then an hour later, again. And then a day later, you hear of some little black kid getting hung and lynched from a tree close to Ohio, all limbs broken, and then the next day again. So that the field is disrupted with how this propaganda is playing us against ourselves. And the reason why I'm talking about that, because it feeds into black men in prison, black men in because if you if if if you if you spin and shape a narrative like that, you're gonna watch the ripple effect of, but I just I I sit back and I look at all of the how it does every four years, every eight years, every 20 years, because they don't play short-term game. It's a long-term game, and you can watch the cycles. And now there's all these wars going on right now in the world.

SPEAKER_06 1:34:29

I love that you shared this to provide context like that. And I we we're not from here, we're not from the US, and we spend a lot of time talking about inflation and the dollar is losing value and so on. But when you come from the outside, and we've been very fortunate, just like your tour to Africa, for example, we've been for very fortunate to travel a lot and see a lot of mentalities. It's very clear when an outsider comes to the US, it's very visible that someone is benefiting from the country being divided.

SPEAKER_08 1:35:02

Very obvious divided states of America.

SPEAKER_06 1:35:05

There is an orchestrated plan to keep things divided so that it's probably connected to some money. Things can be happening in the actual main story plot, and all these things are to divide.

SPEAKER_08 1:35:21

I won't fight you because your skin color is a different degree in a shade of mine. I won't I I won't do it. I don't care how many images, and I know what happened to my ancestors, but I know why I am the way that I am today, and I can go damn near to any country around anyone, the wealthiest people and the most hardcore people, and never lose myself. It's because I don't play that game. And if you don't allow yourself to get swept up in the game, you cannot be gamified.

SPEAKER_05 1:35:53

And for that, you need to know what game is happening. Exactly what you're doing. You need to see the game.

SPEAKER_08 1:35:58

You've got to see that, but in order to see the game, you can't get swept up in it. You gotta step out of it.

SPEAKER_06 1:36:04

What would you say to people who don't believe in love?

SPEAKER_00 1:36:09

I would first acknowledge them for all of maybe things that didn't pan out the way that they desired. I would see them in whatever reason that had them turn away from love and just apologize for whatever had them close off their heart. Because I bet you three-year-old them and five-year-old them and six-year-old them really believed in love. And that my prayer for them is that they can find it in their heart to believe again. In whatever it may be, a person, a thing, or a dream, or a desire.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:56

Thank you guys for your presence.