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Episode XXV

Bob & Brad

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0:00 | 1:17:46
SPEAKER_05

You're hanging out with Bob and Brad. Two guys with too many moods, too many takes, and not nearly enough facts. Welcome to Bob and Brad. Perpetually wrong.

SPEAKER_04

Bob, how are you today? Today, I am awesome. March 19th. The start of March Madness. It is. And a basketball season. And here we are at Darb's patio. Whack of patio bar.

SPEAKER_06

True, there's no patio. And I tried getting us up on the balcony for the special show. Because it is a special show.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah, because it's XXV.

SPEAKER_06

Another Roman numeral. And they said, nope, can't be up in the balcony. So here we are.

SPEAKER_04

How do you figure they picked X for 10?

SPEAKER_06

I don't know. I have no idea where that came from. Maybe we should do some research.

SPEAKER_04

We should. I has one. I get that. It's I. I. I am one. Yep.

SPEAKER_06

Two is two I'm I.

SPEAKER_04

Yep. Which is two I might start introducing you as uh. This is my I.

SPEAKER_06

And that's my I. Yeah. I'm yeah.

SPEAKER_04

The uh crowd's starting to pick up here.

SPEAKER_06

It is, it is. Um they got trivia coming in here tonight, so uh it's gonna get a little rowdy around here.

SPEAKER_04

Um funny that she tried saying it's because they got trivia and they got basketball.

SPEAKER_06

Uh huh.

SPEAKER_04

Big fucking sign out front that says Bob and Brad. Perpetually wrong, yeah. Yeah, that didn't bring nobody in, didn't it?

SPEAKER_06

That's that's why there's a line out front, and they're slowly letting them in.

SPEAKER_04

One at a time. Uh-huh. Fire marshal's still working. Can't let them crowd it.

SPEAKER_06

That's right. So it may be a little noisy in the background for some of the for the listeners compared to what you're used to, but we're live on on the radio. They know how to work their fucking radio. They can tune all that out. We're live on location, Darb's patio, eating rapids.

SPEAKER_04

Um yes, we were asked to do this.

SPEAKER_06

Yes. And um, so it's a lot more comfortable here. It is it's actually a really good spot. I mean, the camera fits really there. I got my leg up. Yep. So it is the start of the brackets today. Uh football or football.

SPEAKER_04

That's a season to go.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Uh basketball. I don't like I don't like basketball, but basketball starts.

SPEAKER_04

You know where you get confused? Where? Because have you ever seen a seal ice skate and play hockey? Probably not. Nope. You ever seen a seal run down to the 40-yard line and catch a pass? Nope. Probably not.

SPEAKER_03

Uh-uh.

SPEAKER_04

But you know what a seal can do? Play basketball. Fucking right they can.

SPEAKER_06

What? Yeah, it's XXV. Yeah, we got this. Peanut gallery is telling us what what episode we're on. Luckily haven't covered that already. Jesus. It's funny to see them all here for us. It is. It is. Um got the peanut gallery out there. No big deal. But yeah, basketball. Started today at 1215, first game. Was it that early? It was. For the for the March Madness NCAA brackets.

SPEAKER_04

Uh already had a couple upsets. Wisconsin. Um the school that beat them.

SPEAKER_06

Wisconsin. He just told me to high point.

SPEAKER_04

Yep.

SPEAKER_06

High point beat Wisconsin. Whooped their ass. It wasn't even they beat them. They whooped their ass. So that screwed a lot of people's brackets up, which I'm laughing about.

SPEAKER_04

Get rid of it right away.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Because you know, I'd rather lose in this round than to make it. Actually, make it to the final. Yeah. And then lose.

SPEAKER_06

I'm predicting the final match.

SPEAKER_04

Who is it?

SPEAKER_06

Michigan and Michigan State in the finals.

SPEAKER_04

How the brackets work. Can that happen?

SPEAKER_06

It can. It can. Uh, there was some guy named Kenny on TV. He called it, but he said state was gonna win overall. That's where he's wrong.

SPEAKER_04

You think Michigan will? Michigan's gonna take it.

SPEAKER_06

And they're gonna beat little brother, like they always do.

SPEAKER_04

You are against a primo Michigan.

SPEAKER_06

And then Izzo's gonna be like, I said I wasn't nobody's damn little brother. He's getting older. He got pissed off about that. Did you see that clip? That was crazy. Hey, fuck you. Yeah, you know what? Play better. But honestly, I really like Izzo, even though he's not my team's coach. I really like him. He's a good guy. I ever tell you about my Izzo story of seeing him at BJ's? No, let's hear it.

SPEAKER_04

I didn't? No. Oh. Well, we're shopping at BJ's.

SPEAKER_06

And uh that's not blowjobs for those that don't know. It's a wholesale coach club like Sam's in Costco.

SPEAKER_04

Yes. However, I got really excited the first time I delivered to BJ's years ago. Uh huh. BJ's wholesale. I'm like, fuck, good. I can finally afford them.

SPEAKER_06

Nah.

SPEAKER_04

No. Anywho, Izo's recognizable by 90% of the people out there. Uh-huh. And he's pushing a cart with his uh, I forget his wife's name. Uh the little Lupe. Yes. Yeah. And they're coming up and down. It was COVID time, so we all had our mouse on. Uh huh. And I'm looking. I said, Trish, that's Tom Izzo. Whatever, no, it isn't. And they walk back. Down the next aisle because they're doing opposites. As they come down one, we're going up it. Yeah. And we did three aisles. And every time I said, Trish, that's Izzo. No, it isn't. She naturally thinks I'm stupid. Well, we get down, going down this other aisle, and I'm looking at him. He's looking at me. And I said, Yeah, it's Brad Simmons. I put my mask on. No, you didn't. No, you didn't. He laughed and he said, There's no way she was gonna believe you. Have a good day. Oh, if it wasn't COVID, I could have gotten the picture and shit up. That was funny.

SPEAKER_06

He probably has never had anybody pull that one out. Probably not.

SPEAKER_04

You know?

SPEAKER_06

And he's probably listening. I bet he is. If he's listening, he needs email in.

SPEAKER_04

Half his team is?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

He'd be a foolish well, probably not right now. Well no, they're busy. Oh, we're not live anyways.

SPEAKER_06

Well, yeah, but they're playing who they're playing right now. Yeah, who are we recording?

SPEAKER_04

North Dakota?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, North Dakota State.

SPEAKER_04

Oh. This week with uh Facebook, I had an altercation where I commented on somebody's post. Uh-huh. And then I got called the small-minded piece of shit. And she had this big list of, oh, me problems, me problems. Well, fuck you. And then she comes back later and says, hey, I had to delete it because of this, that's and the other thing, whatever. But we're not at an airport. You don't tell me what you're doing, just do it. Right. You know, and then you you put it on there because you were throwing a fucking fit. Uh-huh. Leave it on there. Yeah. I have never deleted one fucking thing. Oh I did delete one thing on Facebook once. Yeah. And you know what picture that was. Uh-huh. The one I posted. Yes. Yeah. But that's the only thing I ever deleted. I don't get rid of people, they get rid of me. And what do they do when they get rid of you? They delete you. They're like, this chick didn't delete me because she can't stand the thought of not having me around. Right, right. But she probably masturbates. It's like when you used to hang up the phone. Remember you used to be able to slam the phone? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Now you do it, it costs yourself fucking 1700 bucks.

SPEAKER_06

Right. Yeah, you just hit the button. Yeah. No, no, fuck you. They should have a hard hit. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

They should.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, like make it slam in their ear. Right. Yeah. Somebody's already amused to it. Yep. Yep. Yeah, they're already. We missed out on that. Yeah.

unknown

Well.

SPEAKER_04

We should really keep our comments.

SPEAKER_06

Quiet. No, because we give everybody million-dollar ideas and then we don't get no benefits of it.

SPEAKER_04

And they don't even give us back 33 cents a day. Oh, Nikki Campbell. I apologize. You were one of the original founders when it came to sponsoring. One of. Um Bob uh gets to talking about, but this is going to make it really rough here.

SPEAKER_06

Oh boy. Yeah, keep going back.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Wow. Oh.

SPEAKER_06

It's not about you, Nikki. It's about the uh people coming in the building.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. But I want to say thank you to all the people that are sponsoring us. Uh when we get to naming names, we tend to forget some people, but now everything's okie dokie artichokey. Yeah. And uh a good thing that we'll never forget you again is if you double down on that.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, because really the ones we talk about the most are the top supporters. So if they're put if they're spending the most money, they're getting the most credit. Like uh commercials. Yeah, yeah. Do you want a 30-second snippet or do you want a 60-second snippet?

SPEAKER_04

We should do commercials.

SPEAKER_06

Right now? Be Zelmer Trucking, Brian and Christy Zelmer, they are buying the whole minute.

SPEAKER_04

Wouldn't that be fun if we had like a button on there and we could just go to commercial?

SPEAKER_06

There is a way to do that.

SPEAKER_04

I know. Yeah. I keep thinking about buying one of them.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah. And here's the deal, okay? Oh, thank you. Oh, good night. This is way better than the studio.

SPEAKER_04

This is way better. Oh, wow, you don't even serve me like this.

unknown

No.

SPEAKER_04

And I don't look half as good. Anywho, so we should start doing this. Yeah. And traveling around to a different bar every week. We could be world travelers. World renowned world travelers.

SPEAKER_06

World travelers?

SPEAKER_04

I think so.

SPEAKER_06

Alright. I mean we had a little VIP party last weekend. That was a good time. Oh man. Great time.

SPEAKER_04

That was a great time, actually. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Homemade breadsticks, homemade pizza, cold beer.

SPEAKER_04

Yep.

SPEAKER_06

Lots of entertainment.

SPEAKER_04

And girls trying to swallow a big old fucking donger.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, yeah. That thing was big.

SPEAKER_04

Christy said she could get half of it, and I said, you can't even get over the head. She couldn't even get over the peehole.

SPEAKER_06

And then I had a set of fake boobs walking around and they got motorboated like you wouldn't believe. What was his name? Greg? Greg.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Yep.

SPEAKER_04

Was a cool guy. Somebody we met. And he says, you know, you guys are in ten countries, but I opened for Aerosmith at the silver dollar.

SPEAKER_06

And we thought he was full of shit.

SPEAKER_04

Until his wife stepped up.

SPEAKER_06

Until he started telling us the facts.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Greg was a cool dude.

SPEAKER_04

We should get him on this.

SPEAKER_06

We will.

SPEAKER_04

What's his last name? Do you know? Scheibel. Shibel.

SPEAKER_06

Yep.

SPEAKER_04

Not Shiblee.

SPEAKER_06

No.

SPEAKER_04

Okay.

SPEAKER_06

So yeah, we we end up running into some people that were at the little little get together there. Little myth, though. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

It was a good time. Yep. But all them people, what did you tell them? You said.

SPEAKER_06

I said. Take all your pictures and all your videos. And take a picture of this phone number, which is the phone number to the podcast. And send all your content so we can use it for promotions and stuff for the podcast. Oh, I'm not in control of it.

SPEAKER_03

I'll tell you what, zero.

SPEAKER_06

Zero. So there must have been 30 fucking people there. There was. So while you're listening, and then you're like, oh shit, I was one of them that was supposed to send the stuff.

SPEAKER_04

Please send it.

SPEAKER_06

Get to your camera reel. Send your photos, send your videos.

SPEAKER_04

616-528-8293.

SPEAKER_06

Yep.

SPEAKER_04

It's that simple. Oh, and while you're sending us pictures, tell us how many people you're going to bring on the uh June 6th. First annual.

SPEAKER_06

Bob and Brad. Bike ride. Hell yeah. Yeah.

unknown

Oh.

SPEAKER_06

So uh I got to the bar a little ahead of uh Bradley here.

SPEAKER_03

Way ahead.

SPEAKER_06

And I actually had the day off work, so I but I started at 11:30. Because I ain't no bitch. And uh I sat with some of our listeners and uh talked to them and I says, hey, I got a couple notes on the on the note app. Do you want to hear what we're gonna talk about? And they're like, Yeah, yeah, let's hear what's hear what you gotta say. And so I read off a couple of them, and uh the response from one of them was because you are both closed-minded motherfuckers.

SPEAKER_04

I know who probably said that. I'm not gonna say her name.

SPEAKER_06

Right.

SPEAKER_04

No.

SPEAKER_06

Well, you know who said it.

SPEAKER_04

I'm not gonna say it, Miss Baker.

SPEAKER_06

But uh why wouldn't she, Miss Baker? I am for real.

SPEAKER_04

I mean I don't want to sound rude. She's a cute girl. If she had a better attitude, I'd probably go mow her yard.

SPEAKER_06

You'd mow her yard?

SPEAKER_04

I don't want to say it derogatory. I don't think I'm not closed-minded like that.

SPEAKER_06

I don't think she mows the grass. Who mows it over there? I think Dexter does.

SPEAKER_04

Really?

SPEAKER_06

Actually, I know he does because he got a he got himself a new zero turn last year.

SPEAKER_03

You got a bad boy? It is. Oh, no, she.

SPEAKER_06

I told him I says I'd go with a bad boy if I were you. So you started looking at how's he looking on orange? I never looked at him mowing. You mow? Uh Lucas mow? No. Kelly? Yeah. Yeah. She she mows she mows 75% of the time.

SPEAKER_04

You know, I like doing when I mow. What? Riding around my shirt off, getting a suntan. Yeah. Kelly do that? Yep.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, that's why I let her mow. That's why the campground's fall. That's why I let her mow. There's a reason. Does she really?

unknown

No.

SPEAKER_04

Backyard?

SPEAKER_06

No.

SPEAKER_04

No.

SPEAKER_06

No. She has, like, if I get home and she's mowing and she'll she'll stop, she'll flash me. How much fun is that? It's awesome. I love it.

SPEAKER_04

Yep. We've seen them a million times. Right. But one more time.

SPEAKER_06

But they're still mine.

SPEAKER_04

Right.

SPEAKER_06

And I still like to see them.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, it's fun when they're fun like that.

SPEAKER_06

Well, she'll be like and I'll pull them in the driveway and I'll get out of the truck. And she'll be like, she'll stop. She'll be like, whoop. And I'm like, hell yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Fuck yeah. Pretty soon, another 10 years, she'll just have to whoo. They go down quick. Oh. Oh. Yeah. I hope not. How's your pond doing?

SPEAKER_06

Oh my god, it's full.

SPEAKER_04

Look good, don't it?

SPEAKER_06

Oh, it looks great.

SPEAKER_04

I know mine does too.

SPEAKER_06

In fact, I had to go save the SS Lucas out of the pond again because I pulled it to the edge.

SPEAKER_04

You need a rope to tie that up around the pier.

SPEAKER_06

That's a good idea. I should do that. You should. Instead, I grabbed a long stick and I shoved it from one end of the pond, and I walked, got it to the edge, and I walked it around, and I got the skid steer and a s and a ratchet strap and I pulled the motherfucker out. Where'd you put the ratchet strap? Did you put it around the pedal? Yep. Yep. Fished it in one side over and back up and hooked it to the grapple bucket. Pulled it off. What did you do? Hook it to the little cleat?

SPEAKER_04

I hooked it around the god. Well, the cleat first broke that off. Then I wrapped around the pedals and I pulled. Never gave it a thought that once you start going through the dirt, stop. I broke a paddle off.

SPEAKER_06

Well, see, what I had is I I've got the skid steer with the gravel bucket, so I was able to get it. And so I picked her out. So she was sitting on the back of it.

SPEAKER_03

Get it off the paddles.

SPEAKER_06

Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_04

That would have been handy.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Should have called. I'd have been right there.

SPEAKER_04

I could have got my fucking fire pit cleaned out at the same time. I might just go push that motherfucker in the pond tonight and give you a call. But yeah, if I could get an 80-degree day right now with the sun out, I'd take the only picture ever that I would take of that pond again. Because it's so fucking full.

SPEAKER_06

Who mows your grass?

SPEAKER_04

Well, actually, we got a guy, uh, Ricardo. Um he comes up. He's uh he's kind of a migrant. He he comes up in the summertime from Florida, and uh he does a pretty good job on that yard. Although I I'll mow it once in a while. If they they he he ain't coming in, I'll go out there and mow it. But I don't think he likes me mowing it because I drop the duck and I mow it because I don't want to mow it every day.

SPEAKER_06

But he likes to mow, so he leaves a hire. Oh. And then he can mow again and again. Six days a week.

SPEAKER_04

He just twists the weeds. Yeah. He don't, yeah, I don't think he cuts around.

SPEAKER_06

Eight days a week. Is that the baby?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Yeah. Can you name them? You got Paul and Paul? Paul McCartney. Ringo Star. Ringo Star.

SPEAKER_06

Uh Ozzy Osborne.

SPEAKER_04

Uh, and one more.

SPEAKER_06

Oh no.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, Ringo Paul. You got uh I can pitch your ass.

SPEAKER_06

Um I heard that about you.

SPEAKER_04

Hey, ask them. I bet they know. I don't know. Probably threw her panties at one. Um George Harrison. And I always forget the other one. Are you looking it up?

SPEAKER_06

No.

SPEAKER_04

Oh.

SPEAKER_06

No, I don't know. You should look it up.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, would you? George Harrison, Paul McCartney, Ringo Star, and that other guy nobody knows. Um God damn. John Lennon.

SPEAKER_06

Yep.

SPEAKER_04

Yep. I should have known that because he's got the best Christmas. Yeah, you're a little off on that. It was a joke. Jesus Christ, yeah. Um back in the day when the Beatles came over here. Uh yeah, the stones too. Yeah. Would you have been a Rolling Stones guy or a Beatles guy, you think?

SPEAKER_06

Rolling Stones.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Yeah. Hands down.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Beatles are good. But the Beatles, the Beatles I put in the same class as Johnny Cash. Like they're all the same. I I don't know.

SPEAKER_04

I just I'm both from England, right?

SPEAKER_06

Johnny Cash?

SPEAKER_04

No. Uh he's from Tennessee or some shit. Yeah, I don't know. But uh the the Stones, they're from over there, right? Are they? I think so.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, I don't know.

SPEAKER_04

Um McJagger moves like he's I got the moves like Jagger.

SPEAKER_06

She got the moves like Jagger. That's uh Oh, that's that's a good Maroon 5, ain't it?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Yeah. And how does he sing that high?

SPEAKER_06

I have no idea.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, they got some good songs too. They're not like my typical go-to band, but uh they're from the United Kingdom.

SPEAKER_06

All right.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, yeah. London. And that fucking Keith Richards, he's almost as old as my grandma. I think she babysat him a couple times. She might have. Fuck. And he's still alive, doing good. I don't know how. Tucker blood. I think we need to drink more.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, tucker blood.

SPEAKER_04

Well, yeah, that motherfucker too. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, those 17 times.

SPEAKER_06

I want to party with Charlie Sheen sometime.

SPEAKER_04

It'd be a good time. It'd be a real good time.

SPEAKER_06

Um getting to be nice out again.

SPEAKER_04

We gotta nail some shit down for this bike ride.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Uh Christy Zomer said that. Yeah. We gotta text your ideas, text some shit. Uh, but Christy Zommer said she is gonna buy a big old like gift for the person at the end.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

And so we just gotta decide. Do we want to do it like a poker run where best hand wins? Do you want to just do a 50-50 type thing where everybody gets a ticket?

SPEAKER_06

I kind of like the poker run deal.

SPEAKER_04

I think it'd be funny.

SPEAKER_06

Winner takes it.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I think it'd be fun. And then uh Megan Burke said that to add uh Christy's graciousness, she would uh put their dinner and drinks for free for that night, whoever won.

SPEAKER_06

Whoever won the poker run?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. So if you win, make sure you buy everybody around or two.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Cheap fuck. And and you know what? We shouldn't have to buy any of our drinks.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, I don't think we will. Not gonna happen.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Nope. We should uh put it on Jim's bill. Yeah. Put that one on Stacy's.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I'll work my way around them. Have you ever seen a Stacy's mom that really had it going on? All the Stacey's I know their moms ain't you're right.

SPEAKER_06

I haven't, yeah. Yeah. No, I I And I don't know, is it age?

SPEAKER_04

What is it? But every year I notice more hot moms. Oh yeah. Are they just getting hotter or are we just getting more I think it's in the chicken.

SPEAKER_06

You think so? I think it's in the chicken. I think it's the hormones in the chicken.

SPEAKER_04

They didn't have moms looking like that back in the day.

SPEAKER_06

And school teachers. If you're a female school teacher, you're probably pretty hot.

SPEAKER_04

For the most part.

SPEAKER_06

Right.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I mean, you know, I was just thinking she's probably pretty smart because I'm more into mental than I am looks.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, shame on you. Bless your heart. Yeah, I bless your heart.

SPEAKER_04

I uh cannot believe the way teachers look. I know. They are put together. Remember our gym teacher looked like Sylvester Stallone. Just a girl.

SPEAKER_06

Not mine. He he Oh, you had a dude? Yeah. He was uh he was a little special. Yeah, he was a scrawny little thing. Oh he was uh he was kind of an idiot.

SPEAKER_04

Let me ask you this. The other night my kid posted a thing because we uh had a half day today because the girls now are basketball team is now going to state.

SPEAKER_07

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

So today was the semifinal game.

unknown

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

So we canceled and made a half day. Son of a bitch. Now I need to find somebody to babysit because blah blah blah, she had shit to do. Right. And she says, I don't know how moms with real jobs do it. And I said, the thing is, is most of these real job people, they don't have real jobs.

SPEAKER_06

No. They either work from home.

SPEAKER_04

Yep, or they have 17 people in their office doing the same exact thing.

SPEAKER_06

Exactly.

SPEAKER_04

And well, you're a state worker. State employee. So tell me this. Do you have any knowledge of the actual um non-state workers that are in the office? Like office setting state workers. You know any?

SPEAKER_06

Not really.

SPEAKER_04

Because I don't want to be the only dick here, so follow me down this path.

SPEAKER_05

I'm right behind you, buddy. My thing is, is these state workers oh yeah, you know, I can take tomorrow and the next three days off. Okay, well, who's gonna do your job?

SPEAKER_06

Oh, he'll still be there when I get there.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah. How is that? Like you at least I see you guys do self.

SPEAKER_04

You know, right. Fucking whoa, don't spill your beer. They're doing construction here putting the guardrail back up. Right.

SPEAKER_05

You know, but these these office workers, there's 30 of them doing the job that fucking four could do.

unknown

Right.

SPEAKER_05

Why is that okay?

SPEAKER_06

Because there's so much time available to take off, and they won't deny you of your time off. They gotta make sure somebody's in the office that can do the job. It is and it don't look good on you.

SPEAKER_04

No, but a lot of it is when I go to work, I want to feel like I've got a you, a purpose.

SPEAKER_06

Right.

SPEAKER_04

You know, like that's the thing I miss most about construction, is I pull out of the driveway at the end of the day, that's what I did today.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, you know, you can do that. It's further along than what it was when I got there. Yep, yeah. I get that.

SPEAKER_04

I do, but just to go sit there and I don't know. Like I said, I don't want to wrinkle feathers because a lot of our listeners are state employees are that way.

SPEAKER_06

Not state workers.

SPEAKER_04

Right. Is there other jobs that are like that? Like you think if you go to the Meyer headquarters, do you think there's a lot of people there that don't do dick?

SPEAKER_06

I think but I think there probably is. Yeah. I don't think it's just the state. I think there's other other any big company entities across the state, yes.

SPEAKER_04

That's I know the company I work for has got a bun. I'd go in there, duck duck goose, fire every goose. Right.

SPEAKER_06

And the same shit would get done.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. So you're not gonna notice the difference.

SPEAKER_06

Right. So I think it's everywhere. I think there I think there's fat that needs to be trimmed everywhere.

SPEAKER_04

I ain't liking these gas prices. I ain't like this at gadarbs, but this just cost me about sixty-two dollars and change to get here.

SPEAKER_06

I ain't liking these diesel prices. I know. Five ten dollars a gallon.

SPEAKER_04

A couple places hit six today. Jesus in Michigan.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Yeah. And I'm gonna have to start walking around to get places, and then the beer prices are going up, so I'm gonna have to be sober. So I'm gonna be walking around sober, and that's not good for anything.

SPEAKER_04

That's not gonna be fun.

SPEAKER_06

No, no, no.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, you think it's high enough now that it's wrecking uh camping for people already? Or do you think people are holding on yet? Like keep the reservation.

SPEAKER_06

I think it'll have a small impact. I don't think it'll have a large impact.

SPEAKER_04

That fucking back when it went up in 20. That killed a lot of people. Yeah. And that's what but the park came out with that neat little thing where you leave your camper and then you just pick it up, move it to the next place. Seasonals, I got a problem with seasonals. Okay, talk to me. It's not camping. Because when I come to your seasonal and I say, Oh, so this is your camper? Oh no, this is our house. Um, do you see that we brought this uh what do they call them fucking pavilion in?

SPEAKER_05

Uh-huh. Yeah, we got a pavilion and we've got well, you're taking, you just turned this into a cottage. Right.

SPEAKER_04

So And I don't want to own a cottage.

SPEAKER_06

So obviously we have a fifth-wheel camper. We tour. Is that really camping?

SPEAKER_04

It's more camping than a seasonal.

SPEAKER_06

What is camping?

SPEAKER_04

Camping in most people's mind, and even in my mind, you know what camping is in a tent is getting the family, the wife and the kids to know that at 6 p.m. Friday night we're we're leaving. And then you can be doing it in your tent, your camper, whatever. And then spending from 6 to 6.15 getting fucking furious because you're still packing this shit up. Nobody helped you pack it up. You get everything in that fucking truck or in the car, and then they look at you and you say, What? Well, you're gonna bring the cooler, motherfucker! Why wasn't that first in line? Right. You bring everything out, you said stage it. I pack it.

SPEAKER_06

That's what I like about having a camper. Because everything's already in it. That's what I keep telling you. Oh, we've said more people come in. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Welcome. Yeah. Um yeah. This place is starting to fill up.

SPEAKER_04

No, they had a smaller fucking area, it'd be full now.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. That's because everybody wants to come see Bob and Brad. Well, fuck yes. I don't blame them.

SPEAKER_04

Except for Bob and Brad. They don't want to see us because they're a bunch of cocksuckers that keep reporting us on our social media.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. We're gonna we're gonna fix that problem too.

SPEAKER_04

Yep. Me and Bob are gonna take a bike ride in Minnesota.

SPEAKER_06

Yep.

SPEAKER_04

You know, kick the copy right right out of them.

SPEAKER_06

I had I had suggested a couple things that we could do, and you said no, we don't want to take those drastic measures just yet.

SPEAKER_04

Right.

SPEAKER_06

But now I think it's time.

SPEAKER_04

You say the word, I'll be there.

SPEAKER_06

Bird. Bird, bird, bird, bird, bird, bird, bird, bird. Bird's the word.

SPEAKER_04

I'll be uh Sonny, you can be uh Tubbs, Crockett and Tubbs. There you go. Yeah. Did you ever watch that show? Miami Vice? Yeah. It's a good show. Yeah. Got me thinking.

SPEAKER_06

I'm more like I like Hawaii 5-0.

SPEAKER_04

What were their names?

SPEAKER_06

Uh Bookham Dano. Yeah, man.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I get to be Bookham. You can be Dano. I don't really know what their names are. Bo and Luke. Yeah, I like Bo and Luke. Let's be Bo. You gotta be Luke because you got dark hair. Okay. We don't want to confuse people.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, that's true. And you got the long gray hair. It might be Uncle Jessie if I grow my beard out. Well, we'll borrow Dexter's Tesla and we'll paint that motherfucker orange and put an O2 on it.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, fucking right we will. Yeah. We get to keep the flag though up on top.

SPEAKER_06

No, we'll put a pride flag on top of it because it's a Tesla.

SPEAKER_04

He'd like it.

SPEAKER_06

He would.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. He's a good guy.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

Hey, Dexter. Dexter.

SPEAKER_06

He ain't listening. He's too involved in the he's too involved in the basketball game.

SPEAKER_03

Dexter! Come here.

SPEAKER_05

Come here.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, we're bringing out our first guest. Our first guest.

SPEAKER_04

I'll share my microphone.

SPEAKER_06

You gonna ask him if we can borrow the Tesla? I'll put this right here. Come on in. Come on in.

SPEAKER_04

Have a seat. Game's on. I ain't got time for it. I know, you got a minute. Hurry up. Hurry up.

SPEAKER_06

The game's on. He knows where the camera's at. Yeah, he does. So we got a question.

SPEAKER_01

Alright, here we go. My debut. Good morning, America.

SPEAKER_06

Are you Lester Holt?

SPEAKER_04

Why's it gotta be Lester Holt?

SPEAKER_06

Because he's black.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, I never saw Cancell.

SPEAKER_01

Kind of makes sense. Thank you, Brad. I appreciate you. Hey, if I was looking at you, I would guess Cancun. Are you trying to call ISO?

SPEAKER_06

Sorry. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

So do I need peanuts or we're going we're going to uh Neil Dynamic if you want to be we can show we could we're gonna confront the people that keep reporting us on TikTok.

SPEAKER_06

We need a car. We need a car. And we're going in like the old days. And we put together a couple scenarios of who we thought we could be. And we come down to Bo and Luke Duke. The Duke boys. Yeah, Bo and Luke Duke. What did that call them? I can't remember what I call it. Jebediah something or not. That was Uncle Jesse you're talking about.

SPEAKER_01

Jebediah the third. Can we borrow the Tesla? We want to use the Tesla to go in. We're gonna get you 300 miles and we're gonna stop and charge.

SPEAKER_06

We're gonna paint, we're gonna spray paint that motherfucker orange. And we're gonna put O2 on the side of it. And the General Lee used to have a Confederate flag on top. Yeah, we ain't doing that. We ain't doing that. We're gonna put a Pride flag on the top.

SPEAKER_07

Jesus.

SPEAKER_01

Gotta get with the tanks. Gotta get with the banks. We're gonna put a pride flag. Well you guys have been you guys have been getting so accepting. I mean, that would be a good idea, but my car. Yeah. Probably not.

SPEAKER_06

But we're gonna we're gonna charge it.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, no, no.

SPEAKER_06

Ah, come on. Thought we had something going.

SPEAKER_01

This is our first guest. Yeah, he is.

SPEAKER_06

You are the very first guest.

SPEAKER_01

You know what? I I take pride in that. I'm the very first guest of the show. People are gonna envy you. On room Roman numero 25. It is. I don't even know what that Roman numero looks like, but XXV. XXV. Oh yeah. That makes sense. Yeah, that makes sense.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Not to mention, you're the first guest. You're the only listener who has a private hotline. Hotline group chat with Bob and Brad.

SPEAKER_01

Well, be careful. I don't even put that live because now you're gonna get other guys coming in here.

SPEAKER_06

That don't mean we gotta accept it.

SPEAKER_01

Well, that's true. But how's that gonna make Jason feel? Jason's been emailing this whole time.

SPEAKER_06

Jason is our best, Jason is our best email.

SPEAKER_01

Emailer.

SPEAKER_04

The thing I like is uh I like my guests to have control of their spouses. Jason's not there yet. Well And neither is Dexter.

SPEAKER_05

Oh bullshit. You see him putting on your place earlier?

SPEAKER_06

I don't know.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, Julie says, well, not and you went. Listen, there's a reason why I said you need to go and have a meeting with Katie and Julie. I like your idea. You guys gotta just hash it out. Uh-huh. You guys gotta all hash it out.

SPEAKER_06

Two are gonna come out. One are not. And I know who.

SPEAKER_04

Three's going in. Uh-huh. I'm gonna get a t-shirt that says this fight sponsored by Blue Chew.

SPEAKER_01

They'd love it.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, good night.

SPEAKER_01

We said that. He said he's gonna be excited to have that. I said two inches can only go so far. Now you fuckers got me missing my game. Hey, go get it. Hey, thank thanks for stopping by the show. Thanks for supporting.

SPEAKER_06

Why don't you get the whole crowd of there to give a big hoot and holler for Bob and Brad? On a commercial.

SPEAKER_01

Of course, on a commercial.

SPEAKER_04

Or after a big shot, unless it's an all-state commercial. And then you can send us you can send us a couple more.

SPEAKER_06

You can send us a couple more beers too.

SPEAKER_04

Bring us a couple more. That was fun.

SPEAKER_06

First guest. That was fun. He did good. He did. Yeah. He getting the fucking he he knew where the camera was. What's up, folks? Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Huh. I didn't know he was black. I always thought he was Mexican. You should tell me these things. That's why. Last year when I called him on Cinco de Mayo, he's like, what the fuck, dude? Well, that explains a lot. Now I gotta remember Kwanzaa.

SPEAKER_06

Jesus Christ.

SPEAKER_04

Well, man. Thanks for the heads up on that. Yeah, you're welcome. I got you.

SPEAKER_06

Um. So we talked about the SEALs that can play basketball. So we're really not interested in basketball.

SPEAKER_04

No. But what would you do? Well, okay. So we're gonna go out around this nation and we're gonna go to all these sports.

SPEAKER_06

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04

I'm gonna take you on a sport authority tour.

SPEAKER_06

Sports. Hey, look at that. Hey, thank you. Hey, you put your butt right in front of the camera. For ten dollars. Folks, we're gonna need another 33 cents a day.

SPEAKER_04

If you like that, give us a few bucks. We can keep it going on all night long.

SPEAKER_06

We'll be here next week. And the next week, and it's gonna get warmer. There'll be shorts.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04

Make that scratching snuff. Um we could do that. What one sport would you say, Brad? No, I've had enough. I don't want to see that.

SPEAKER_06

That's tough. Because I'm not big into watching any sports on TV. Right.

SPEAKER_04

But live's different.

SPEAKER_06

But live, I really like. So are we are we going live? Yeah, we have to. If you're taking me live to a well, see, a lot of people's number one answer is going to be like golf. I don't want to watch golf. But honestly, if I'm walking across the golf course, I think I'm in.

SPEAKER_04

Now, if we go there, are you going to follow the same people or are you going to stay at the hole and see everybody?

SPEAKER_06

I probably would stay at the hole for a while, then bounce another hole and just kind of I think golf would be fun. Tennis. Tennis is the sport I don't want to watch.

SPEAKER_04

That's a good one.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. If you said we're going watching all these sports, and I said, nope. Skip me out on Wimble Wimbledon. That's a good one.

SPEAKER_04

I can't get into that game.

SPEAKER_06

I think that's the one. That's fair.

SPEAKER_07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I bet. Is there one for you or is it well? You got me thinking tennis now. Yeah. But I was thinking uh when we go see our overseas fans, squash. I know nothing about it. I don't know. Is that the game where they hit the what the black flat paddle? I think they yeah, I think they got three sticks. I don't know what the flat.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I don't know. You guys, that's something. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

You guys gotta get better about picking out your sports.

SPEAKER_06

Good night. We got some we got a supply of beer here. This is great.

SPEAKER_04

I may never leave. And she showed her butt to the camera.

SPEAKER_06

She did.

SPEAKER_04

So you people, as we're traveling around doing this.

SPEAKER_06

If you're only listening, you're missing out.

SPEAKER_04

If you think you can do better, invite us to your bar.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Um.

SPEAKER_04

Well, now I gotta put an NC 17 on this. A what? And like a NC 17, so youngins don't.

SPEAKER_06

Oh yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

But you know what? Not for children. Fans are fans. If they want to be 13-year-old boys saying, ooh.

SPEAKER_06

So we never f we never finished the campground stuff because you because Dexter rudely interrupted us.

SPEAKER_04

Roy just comes walking in here like he owns the plates.

SPEAKER_06

So no in my opinion, if you're actually camping, it's got to be a tent. When's the last time you camped?

SPEAKER_04

Camp? Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Long time.

SPEAKER_04

Have you guys done it since you've been together?

SPEAKER_06

Yes. Yes, we did. Was Lucas? No.

SPEAKER_04

Because that that that's a that's a page turner there when you get the fucking pack and plays in the camp.

SPEAKER_06

No. So what we do is what a lot of people call glamping.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, you're a glamper.

SPEAKER_06

And and I'm okay with that. I don't I don't want to sleep in a tent. I have no desire to sleep in a tent. Now, I am going hunting out west.

SPEAKER_04

That's yeah or next. This year. This fall?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. And we will be camping.

SPEAKER_04

When are you going?

SPEAKER_06

I'm not sure. I think it's October. Um we're gonna go do mule deer hunting.

SPEAKER_07

October.

SPEAKER_04

Where are you going? Wyoming?

SPEAKER_06

Yep. And Brad's making notes. I'm not sure what he's doing.

SPEAKER_04

I just wrote October Bob's in Wyoming. That way I can plan a vacation as well. Okay. I like overlapping vacations.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah. That way we don't miss a show. I like where your head's at. So, yeah. That we will be camping.

SPEAKER_04

You packing it in?

SPEAKER_06

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Alright. Hear me out.

SPEAKER_06

I'm listening.

SPEAKER_04

I know a lot of people that go out there hunting. Yeah. They run out of the house. They never come back. And they stay indoors.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Why are you guys picking camping over lodging?

SPEAKER_06

Because the guy that I'm going with. It gets cold in October over there. I know it does. The guy I'm setting this that I'm doing this trip with, he's setting it up, and that's what they always did. So that's what we're doing. We got a big tent, wood boy, wood burner in the tent, fireplace, you know, hot. Fuck yeah. Yeah. So that's what we're doing. We're gonna go, we're gonna go shoot some mule deer, and we're gonna have some good food. And then when we get our tags filled for mule deer, we're gonna go shoot a bunch of prairie dogs, and we're gonna have a hell of a time.

SPEAKER_04

The uh fuck, I can't remember the the Madison. Okay, remember the Madison. Okay. And uh cue that up on your uh I think it's Hulu and watch it. It's uh it's only three episodes right now, they're coming out with more here. But it's a very good thing. It's uh these this rich fucking family growing up in New York, and their dad, their dad was like me and you, you know, and he'd go out to his brother's place in Montana every time he needed a break. Yeah, they'd go out there hunting, they had their little cabin and stuff. So we're watching this, and Trish says, wouldn't that be fucking awesome? And I don't know if she's thinking awesome to go see, awesome to experience, but I'm looking at it as I would love to go out there, and that's my new life.

SPEAKER_06

Right.

SPEAKER_04

Just living out there.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_05

Could you imagine how fuck you're stress-free? Winters probably kick your ass a little bit. No different than the UP. You're gonna get used to it. Boy, did they get off?

SPEAKER_06

Oh, jeez.

SPEAKER_04

Where's all that water gonna go? If I was a basement dryer outer, I would head to the UP because it's gonna get warm this week and they're gonna have an issue.

SPEAKER_06

The chance of it.

SPEAKER_04

Fuck. But I would love to go not to the time period of the 1800s. I want to do it today with everything we got today. Right. But just just fucking be done with everybody and everything. Oh, yeah. You know, yeah, fucking you give me a call. Yeah, come on out.

SPEAKER_06

Just a few good friends.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Like I've always thought about there's this fucking uh gravel pit, an old gravel pit that used to be for sale north of us. 110 acres. And I always told Trish, I said, if I ever went get lucky enough to win the lottery, I'm gonna buy that. Yeah, and I'm gonna put in like a subdivision for family that I like and friends that I like. Right. Wouldn't that be cool? The rest of you is fuck off.

SPEAKER_06

Get fucked, stay fucked. That's right. That'd be sweet. Yeah, that's how I am. If I win the lottery, I'm building the compound. And if and and there's only so many people they're gonna be in there, and if if you're not, well, that answers that.

SPEAKER_04

Well, remember, I like to wake up facing Southeast.

SPEAKER_06

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

So wherever you put me, I need to face Southeast.

SPEAKER_06

Alright. Deal.

SPEAKER_04

Do you ever have an issue like that? Like No. Alright, so which way when you're laying in bed? If you open your eyes, don't say the ceiling. But if you open your eyes, which way are you technically facing?

SPEAKER_06

Uh West.

SPEAKER_04

And are you on the or um if the headboard is here? Yes. What side are you on? I'm on the right side. You're on the right side. You guys go to a hotel. Same thing. You stick to the right side.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, most most generally, yes.

SPEAKER_04

How did now has that been ever since you guys have been married? Because you didn't sleep together before that. You're a good Catholic man. Yes.

SPEAKER_06

It's all right.

SPEAKER_04

Have you ever switched? Flip-flopped.

SPEAKER_06

No.

SPEAKER_04

No.

SPEAKER_06

No. It's always been that.

SPEAKER_04

So you're on the right?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Okay, so so I'm on the right.

SPEAKER_04

If you stand at the head of the at the foot of the bed, and you look across the bed, you'd be on the left.

SPEAKER_06

Yes.

SPEAKER_04

So see, we can't sleep together. We'd have to stack them too high.

SPEAKER_06

That ain't gonna happen. Unless I'm on top, cuz motherfucker, you ain't squishing me.

SPEAKER_04

I don't need your pounding ass. Wake up, feel that soft skin.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, my celly! Oh man. Just take it, baby.

SPEAKER_06

Speaking of that, I'm back to 100% from the from the Viagra. Dick working? From the Viagra, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Good.

SPEAKER_06

Everything's working great.

SPEAKER_04

I almost asked him last Saturday if he could get you another one to try. Well, he already told me I could have another one.

SPEAKER_06

You should have got one to try. I should have got one to try. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I'd be still swinging.

SPEAKER_06

The problem is I don't want that to fucking blow your heart up. Well, that is uh 100 milligrams.

SPEAKER_04

That's a lot.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah. Well, not enough, apparently.

SPEAKER_04

You know, and I don't like spreading people's dirty laundry and stuff. But did you know he's taking four fucking shots a day for his diabetes?

SPEAKER_06

Depends on the day, yeah. Damn, dude. But you know what that 100 milligram viagger did for him the same night I took it?

SPEAKER_04

Limp dick.

SPEAKER_06

He got it that night and twice the next day. See, that's weird. And I got nothing. He got my boners. I took the pill. That's what it is. I took the pill.

SPEAKER_04

Like a crystal ball. Like I bounce it off you to get what you wanted.

SPEAKER_06

I took the pill and he got all the boners.

SPEAKER_04

That's not fair.

SPEAKER_06

I know it. It's not.

SPEAKER_04

Wow. She doesn't like boners. Oh. So let's say we rubbed a bottle. Uh huh. And a genie came out.

SPEAKER_06

I'm a genie. What's your three?

SPEAKER_04

Wasn't she hot back then?

SPEAKER_06

Christina, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I was never a huge fan of her because I was more of a Britney fan. But Christina, she's boy, that dirty video. Oh. Yeah. Disney did you well. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_03

Um, anywho.

SPEAKER_04

They leave? The old people? Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

I don't even know if they ate. I think we I think we ran them out of here. Oh, I should see what they ordered.

SPEAKER_04

I think they were just here for drinks. I bet they're not married to each other.

SPEAKER_06

They're like 75.

SPEAKER_04

Slow as their movement.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

Did they eat? Did they eat?

SPEAKER_03

They're quick.

SPEAKER_06

They were quick. Kind of like you and the sack.

SPEAKER_03

Oh, me. Yeah, you are newer. No. Take your time.

SPEAKER_04

If we could rub a genie, you got your three wishes. You have any idea what any one of them three would be?

SPEAKER_06

Yes.

SPEAKER_04

Don't ask for a giant cock. I've seen memes that don't turn out well.

SPEAKER_06

No. No. First one would be unlimited supply of money.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, yep. That's a good one.

SPEAKER_06

Because then I could use that to help a lot of people.

SPEAKER_04

Everybody then. Yeah. It's unlimited.

SPEAKER_06

Exactly. Number two. Eternal health.

SPEAKER_04

Oh no.

SPEAKER_06

Why?

SPEAKER_04

No. Nope. No, no. That means you're going to live forever.

SPEAKER_06

I want to live forever.

SPEAKER_04

Do you really?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. I'm going to live forever if the good die young. That's true.

SPEAKER_04

Really?

SPEAKER_05

You'd want to live. I mean, you see every fucking buddy in your life die. Then you make new friends and they die. You make new friends and they die.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. You would want to. I'd be the old duffer telling everybody how good life is and drinking beer. And then be like, how does he do it?

SPEAKER_04

Unlimited money and unlimited. I said eternal life. Eternal life.

SPEAKER_06

Eternal health.

SPEAKER_04

You don't even need the third wish.

SPEAKER_06

You're right. I got it all.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Yeah. Now, how about them reels? Where some fucking skank whore comes out and a pair of leggings and says, You can only pick two fifty thousand dollars a month. Retire now. New house. Me every day. Who the fuck's picking you with them choices? I'm picking $50,000 a month. God damn right. And a new house. Really? You want you want to live forever. Yeah. Wow. That's different. I've never I am different. You are different. So I asked a question on Facebook the other day, and I kept that's the one where she called me a fucking opinionated, small-minded fucking piece of shit. But when you die, you're not gonna die if you find a genie, but let's assume you're not gonna find a genie and you die. Yeah, no chance of that. So you die today.

SPEAKER_06

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_04

Um your grandpa, he's dead.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

When did how old were you when he died?

SPEAKER_06

Mid-20s.

SPEAKER_04

Mid-20s? Okay. So when you get up there, how old was he when he died? I guess that's a better question.

SPEAKER_06

Early 80s.

SPEAKER_04

Early 80s? Okay. So when you get up there, is he still early 80s in your mid-20s, or are you 41 and mid-80s? I don't know. I'm I'm wondering. Because I need to get to 74 so I can boss my grandpa around. I'll be older. You young whippers sappers! You want a candy bar? Good. Give me one too. Yeah. You know, I don't know how that works. I'm curious.

SPEAKER_06

I don't either.

SPEAKER_04

And I was asking with a legitimate reason, and then this I can't cover. I remember seeing it. Because she's not a bitch, but she just went off on a nut.

SPEAKER_06

How is that closed-minded by asking that question? Because I saw what you posted.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I don't know. Some people, you know, it goes with that thing that we all have an issue. We all have issues. We all got problems.

SPEAKER_06

Fuck yes. I got more than most.

SPEAKER_04

You know. But you know, the thing I like about us is we well, fuck, yesterday was the first time in God, sixteen years that we ever even talked about anything. It's kind of got our girdles bunched up. Yeah. You know?

SPEAKER_07

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Because I I don't air that very often.

SPEAKER_06

Right.

SPEAKER_04

It's you all got fucking a battle.

SPEAKER_06

Everybody's struggling in some way, shape, or form.

SPEAKER_04

Some people talk about it, some people don't.

SPEAKER_06

Right.

SPEAKER_04

I'm not a talker.

SPEAKER_06

No. I just keep pushing forward.

SPEAKER_04

Right. And you know, I mean, yesterday was different because you said, Jesus, Brad, last few times I talked to you, you just kind of crying. And I said, Well, let me tell you, Bob.

SPEAKER_06

Do you need a shoulder to cry on? Oh, fuck. You know, a shoulder to cry on? Is a dick to run. Dick to cry on.

SPEAKER_04

God damn right. That's oh fuck, dude. That's that's the worst part about dying, I think. Because if I die, she's young enough, she's gonna replace me.

SPEAKER_06

No, she ain't.

SPEAKER_04

Assuming you get eternal life.

SPEAKER_06

I'll run that motherfucker out of the door every chance he tries walking up.

SPEAKER_04

That's right. Get out.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

She said I could come over. She's wrong.

SPEAKER_06

Well, she ain't the fucking boss around here. That's right. Because Brad left that torch to my fucking hand.

SPEAKER_04

That's right. And I'm about ready to put her ass on the mower.

SPEAKER_06

Uh-huh. Yeah. So, unless you want to get the fucking weed whacker, get the fuck out of here.

SPEAKER_04

You ain't no use.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03

You know what?

SPEAKER_04

Oh, here's a little something that might jinke your cubes up a little bit. You know how you've been talking to my future son-in-law about plotting out your property? And he keeps saying, Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Haven't seen him yet in three years, have you? No. Well, the other day I see him running across the road coming back towards our house. What were you doing? Oh, I was over at Cody's. Needed to find his fucking marker.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, really?

SPEAKER_04

And I says, Really? And I just left it at that. Little did he know. Next time you see him, you're probably gonna ride his ass.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, I'm not probably gonna.

SPEAKER_04

I definitely would.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. So.

SPEAKER_06

What's that motherfucker's name again? Aaron. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

He's not even worthy of a remembering of the name now.

SPEAKER_04

Right.

SPEAKER_06

I know everybody else is still.

SPEAKER_04

You got everybody else nailed down. Yeah. Maybe if you'd mark out your property, you'd remember him too.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I can't say too much shit though, because I need him this weekend. I gotta do front breaks and I need somebody to put my tires back on.

SPEAKER_06

Oh, he'll do it.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

If he knows what's good for him.

SPEAKER_04

They're moving out.

SPEAKER_06

Oh. They find a place?

SPEAKER_04

April 10th, they're moving to Grand Ledge. Oh. Yeah, found some apartments. Take their dog. Yeah. So there I am.

SPEAKER_06

Not quite empty nesters, though.

SPEAKER_04

Now I got two more.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Way not out, though.

SPEAKER_06

And the youngest one, you ain't gotta worry about her finding anybody anytime soon. Because according to her sisters, she's a real pain in the ass.

SPEAKER_05

Uh, she's she's her mother. A little bossy.

SPEAKER_06

I don't know. I she plays guitar good. She does, but that ain't gonna get you through life. Out of the four of them, I think she's the nicest one out of them.

SPEAKER_04

She is. The thing is, is she's honest.

SPEAKER_06

Right.

SPEAKER_04

Yep.

SPEAKER_06

And that's what people don't like.

SPEAKER_04

Yep. That's the problem.

SPEAKER_06

I can appreciate it.

SPEAKER_04

You know, my other three kids, they're not they're not jewels by any means. Uh-huh. They like to speak their mind. Yeah. The difference is, is they have not realized that speaking your mind usually comes with some issues. Yeah. And it's shocking to them when they get blowback. It's like, oh, well, where'd that come from? Well, maybe because you were treating them like a garbage can. Right. Right. Which I'm kind of gotten used to. What do we got sitting down behind us? Oh, it's trying to look in the dirty barb now. No, you're good. Oh, did they want to get on camera? Is that why they're hanging out over here? Yeah. Um watch these motherfuckers sit down with a camera and do their own podcast. No, they're not. No, they're not. Looks like they're checking lighting.

SPEAKER_06

No. No, it's fine. Anywho, but yes. Honesty.

SPEAKER_04

Put mean mugging. Okay.

SPEAKER_06

God damn.

SPEAKER_04

Honesty has a lot of issues.

SPEAKER_06

It does.

SPEAKER_04

And when you grew up, everybody told you just be honest.

SPEAKER_06

And I'll tell you what, speaking about honesty, I would honestly like some of these motherfuckers to write into the show to perpetually wrong at Outlook.com. Or they can text 616-528-8293. Look at you. But what I really want them to do is we're so close. We are this close. If you are listening, you need to go to Bob and Brad Perpetually Wrong on Facebook.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

And you need to hit the follow button. We are so close to hitting a goal on our Facebook page. 270. We need more followers. So you may like us, you may love listening to us, you may this, you may that. Go to the Facebook page, hit the like or hit the subscribe or follow.

SPEAKER_05

Follow, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Hit the follow and just do it.

SPEAKER_05

And all they gotta do too, if they end up not liking the thing, just fucking unfollow. 30 days later.

SPEAKER_04

Still follow us. Or not unfollow, but uh ignore. Ignore, yes. So go on there. Follow, ignore. That's fine.

SPEAKER_06

Just go on. Somebody else go upstairs? No. Hit the follow. We need we need to get we need to hit 500 followers. That's what we need to do. We need to hit 500. We do.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, buddy. Woke up today's Thursday. Wednesday two. Woke up Tuesday morning.

SPEAKER_06

Uh huh. At about noon. That's easy.

SPEAKER_04

I had to go pee.

SPEAKER_06

Uh huh.

SPEAKER_04

2 a.m. I went and peed. Holy fuck, it's cold. They weren't lying. It was gonna get cold tonight. Uh huh. Get back in bed. Woke up at four, went to pee. Fuck.

SPEAKER_06

Jesus cold.

SPEAKER_04

A lot, dude. All right. And I went back to bed. I'm like, fuck, it's cold. Well, nobody was getting up in the morning. I didn't get up until 7.30 because it was so fucking cold. Out of bed. I was up. And it's just like, what the fuck? Finally, it occurred to me. I'll bet the goddamn furnace ain't working. It wasn't. What happened? It was 58 degrees in the house. Oh, that's cold. That was cold. This time of year. It's cold. 58 on a hot summer night where the sunburn ain't bad.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. So called my buddy Matt Schaefer, who deserves a shout out because he he got over there right away and got us fixed up.

SPEAKER_06

Nice.

SPEAKER_04

Propane's dirty. It clogs up all the holes.

SPEAKER_06

You know what I like? Natural gas.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I can't believe you got that there.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Someday. Someday when I'm living on my 120 acres in Montana.

SPEAKER_06

You're going to run a natural gas line all the way there just for you.

SPEAKER_04

Fucking right. I would love to have natural gas. Oh, yeah, because you'll be there. Yep. How are you whipping? Because I'm thinking about taking up that.

SPEAKER_06

Fly fishing. Yeah. They got all that five. I don't know how they I don't get it. Have you ever tried it? I know, but I don't get it. I don't understand it.

SPEAKER_04

This summer. I know a guy that fly fishes. Okay. He's cool enough, I think he'd let us use a couple of his steaks.

SPEAKER_06

Somebody must have just got some steak. That smells good.

SPEAKER_04

That does smell good. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Hey, can we get a fucking steak over here?

SPEAKER_04

That does smell good. Yeah, fly fish. I don't understand it because they got they got 500 yards of string over here. I don't get it.

SPEAKER_06

I don't know how much tap it. And it's like you just, you just, it's like so.

SPEAKER_04

You know anybody who fly fishes? No. I'm gonna have to talk to him, see if we can go out there for a lesson.

SPEAKER_06

He's gonna teach us.

SPEAKER_04

Oh first time you wad his string up, I think he'll teach us.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, I know what I'm doing. And then the motherfuckers wound up.

SPEAKER_03

Like you're fucking 13 years old jerking it.

SPEAKER_06

You don't know the fuck you're doing. Let me show you. Oh, okay. I'm in. Can you get it out of the tree? Yeah. I don't know how they do it. I don't either. Um yeah, yeah. Oh, they're they're waving at us. He's over there talking to your wife.

SPEAKER_04

He's getting nervous talking to the white girl.

SPEAKER_06

So I see in the notes here you got something about scholarships.

SPEAKER_04

Oh! Dude, we went to the boys' uh state basketball game last Saturday. Uh-huh. And at halftime they did this thing where they M H S A. M-H-S-S-A. Right?

SPEAKER_06

S-A-A or S-S-A. M-H-S-AA-A. A-A.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, I think that's what it is. So they're out there, they're giving away scholarships. Yeah. And cool. Kid got a scholarship. Whatever. That's cool. Congratulations. Congrats. Here's your medal. Thanks. Well, there's these girls dressed up in dresses, and they're wearing fucking chucks. Chuck Taylors.

SPEAKER_05

You don't do that with a dress. You know. You looked so good from here to here to here to what the fuck?

SPEAKER_06

Well, apparently, I brought that up to Julie and said, that's trash. It is. And she thinks it's exceptional. She says, Oh, that that's a hot look. That's that's the thing. No. And I says, no. I said, it's not classy to deserve an award that you're getting. Right. And that's when we got called closed-minded motherfuckers.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, that's what happened.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

So, all right, so I don't want to. I hate when we start talking about people because I don't. I love talking about people much to bring them in. Fuck, but she's a realtor and she's pretty good at her job. She's damn good at her job, yeah. So let's say Michigan has a realtor award show. Is she gonna show up in her dress with fucking Chuck Taylors on? Fuck no. I don't know.

SPEAKER_05

Oh my god, oh my goodness. Yeah. Michigan. But you don't do that.

SPEAKER_06

No, and she would show up in shoes. She would stretch shoes, right? She wouldn't. She'd have a nice classy dress with nice heels on. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

So clothes mind my ass.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

You ain't doing it, bitch. Right. And if she does, I want to be there to see her. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05

So I'd say, hey, why don't you buy some fucking shoes with all that commission?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Get rid of them Chuck Taylors. It really fucking hurt me on that. It was just like, God, you guys just ruined the show. You know, and all the boys there, I will say, all the boys that were there, they all had their hair brushed. They all had a nice outfit on and they had dress shoes. That's the way you're supposed to do it.

SPEAKER_06

Speaking of boys getting their hairbrushed. I gotta I gotta do a mohawk this week for Lucas.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, is he getting into that again?

SPEAKER_06

Well, he usually does it earlier on the wrong side.

SPEAKER_04

Why don't you do a reverse mohawk?

SPEAKER_06

That's what I got. Right. No. So he he usually does the mohawk earlier into the wrestling season.

SPEAKER_04

Is he gonna color it too?

SPEAKER_06

He wants to dye it or bleach it.

unknown

Bleach it.

SPEAKER_04

Blonde?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

So everybody likes a blonde.

SPEAKER_06

He he went, he had regionals this last weekend. And he won. He's the regional champ for his age and weight class. Which is awesome. Two years in a row. Two years in a row. That's a double repeater. Yeah. Um next year will be the trifecta, the three peat.

SPEAKER_04

Look at us putting all our eggs in the basket.

SPEAKER_06

Anywho, so could be. Could be.

SPEAKER_04

If he stays focused.

SPEAKER_06

Yes. And I believe he will.

SPEAKER_04

Alright, well, with all this shooting he's got going on, he really likes that. Yes, he does. Are you cool with it if he says I'd rather do that than wrestle? Or do you think he needs something physical?

SPEAKER_06

I'm going to support whatever sport he's in. But as much as he's passionate about wrestling, I don't see that going at the end.

SPEAKER_04

You don't see it bleeding out?

SPEAKER_06

That's good. If he was to give one up, it'd be baseball.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, is he going to play again this year?

SPEAKER_06

Oh yeah. Yep. He's playing baseball. Catching still. And then football. I don't know. We'll we'll see. Baseball season is going to start here.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, the age they're at, they move them around still, don't they?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, but my guess is he's probably going to play catcher. So what it's what he loves, and he's actually really good at it. So we'll see. But the coach is going to determine where he needs to be and where he wants him and where he's best fit.

SPEAKER_04

If me and you were playing baseball, would you be alright being my catcher?

SPEAKER_06

That seems like a trip question. That seems like a trip.

SPEAKER_04

It's funny how terms are different depending on how you put it.

SPEAKER_06

Right. I'd like to be your outfielder.

SPEAKER_04

I can't shoot that far no more. No, but so you don't think you think the wrestling will stick? I do. That's good.

SPEAKER_06

He's very passionate about wrestling and he and he really takes it serious.

SPEAKER_04

I'm a firm believer that kids should have one sport.

SPEAKER_06

At a time. Well, I don't know.

SPEAKER_04

Because you see some of these kids that are just they excel at a certain sport.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Do you like the whole year-round sport thing? I I I'm actually good with it because we only have the one in makes it a little easier.

SPEAKER_04

But that's everyone.

SPEAKER_06

But I I don't want him doing multiple sports at the same time at the same time.

SPEAKER_03

Overlapping.

SPEAKER_06

Yes. But I'm okay with being multiple sports to where he's busy all year round.

SPEAKER_04

Eaton Rapids have a swimming pool?

SPEAKER_06

Swimming pool?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Yeah. Don't let him get into swimming. That is the worst.

SPEAKER_06

I'm not into swimming. Fuck, I can't swim.

SPEAKER_04

That's why you needed a stick to get the boat.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah. No, I don't I don't think he's I don't think he's interested in that. He likes swimming, but I don't think he's interested in that.

SPEAKER_04

That's a horrible sport to watch. Yeah. So fucking hot and it's loud.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Who's calling you? That's spam. Goddamn bill collectors.

SPEAKER_06

The fucking spam. I am so fucking tired of the spam.

SPEAKER_04

You hit block. You hit report spam.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh.

SPEAKER_06

I'm over it.

SPEAKER_04

Um. Got my first court date, June 9th. Yeah? And then I got one following up on the 20th. And I'm trying to decide what to do here. Just straight back? Or should I feather it a little bit? That you look schizophrenic. So keep it just back? Yeah. Yeah. Because you can't wear a hat on that.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, do if you do that again. You look schizophrenic. You look questionable.

SPEAKER_04

I thought it was maybe a little Tony Hawkish. No back day.

SPEAKER_06

No, you look like you look like you're asking for trouble.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, so just Yeah. Because I'm not gonna cut it.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Well, I think you should. Really? Yeah. You look like a fucking female. How about a tram? I think you should like have a boy's haircut. No, I don't like it. That's what I'd go with is a boy's haircut. Not necessarily a girl's.

SPEAKER_04

You know what? Julie's right. You are. What'd she call you? A closed-minded motherfucker. Yeah. Yeah. She's right. I'm on her side.

SPEAKER_06

You look like um what's that chick, Tomb Raider chick. Had her hair stuck back. Oh. That was Angelina Jolie, wasn't it?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, she was.

SPEAKER_06

You look like Angelina Jolie with fucking hair. Did she?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah. I'm in love with Madeline Klein currently. I'm not sure who that was. Otter Banks, Blanc. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

I'm still into Mariska Argerty. And Leah Remini.

SPEAKER_04

You know, the thing I like about you is you're loyal.

SPEAKER_06

I am. You're a fucking Labrador. When she cut her hair short, I almost strayed.

SPEAKER_04

Stepped you back.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

But she grew it back. She did. She got your email.

SPEAKER_06

Now the only thing I can't stand is on the new Law and Order SVUs. She wears these fucking glasses. They're still making new ones? Oh yeah. Really? Yeah, she's the boss. Really? Iced tea's still on there? No. No. Um. But she's got these glasses, and they're fucking hideous, and they look terrible on her. And I don't like it. And Kelly's like, we're sitting there watching it, she's like, those glasses look hideous. She's just, one, she's looking for anything she can to make her look down her. Right. But two, she's right. The fucking glasses are hideous. So but it's all part of it's a prop for the show.

SPEAKER_04

We're talking there, and I brought up iced tea.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I mean, he was a legit gangbanger, turned into a rapper, turned into an actor.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Um they did that song, Cop Killer. Yes. You know what's amazing is that never comes back to bite him in the ass. No. It's like, did people forget about it?

SPEAKER_06

No, but if a Republican makes a song that has something that doesn't run the course.

SPEAKER_04

This country ain't country anymore. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

So how does that I don't get it?

SPEAKER_06

I don't either.

SPEAKER_04

Hey, these guys behind us look pretty cool.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, they seem pretty legit.

SPEAKER_03

Come over here for a second.

SPEAKER_06

Just one of you is.

SPEAKER_04

Oh, how about you? Come here.

SPEAKER_06

You can talk.

SPEAKER_04

Can I bring him up here? Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

It's mandatory.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, come on, sit on. Alright, what's your name? You're live on the show with Bob and Brad Perpetually Wrong. What's your name?

SPEAKER_02

Uh Danny.

SPEAKER_06

Danny. I'm Brad. He looks like a Cornwall Tools guy.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. And with snap-on boots.

SPEAKER_06

Okay.

SPEAKER_03

Um. Have you ever heard of him?

SPEAKER_02

Um. This is my first time.

SPEAKER_06

Alright. What what are you getting at? So is Danny? Yeah. Danny. Yeah. You're gonna give him a sticker. Yeah. He's gonna put it on his tool truck. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

I work at uh Midwest Power Appointment.

SPEAKER_06

Oh yeah, they're they're they're right there out in uh Hazlitt.

SPEAKER_02

Hazletton.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04

You're here for basketball or you guys just come down here to drink all the time?

SPEAKER_02

Uh I'm here to drink and eat. Uh my brother's here for uh for the basketball game. Is he the one with the short throat? Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Is that because he sucked too many dicks?

unknown

Maybe, I don't know.

SPEAKER_06

Ah, he did. He said he gave us a thumbs up. He said, yep, that that's out of 20, give me in the bathroom. He said that last one got him too far.

SPEAKER_00

50, want some?

SPEAKER_06

No, I'm good, but you can sit right here if you want.

unknown

Thank you.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, you should scan that sometime and give us a listen while you're doing nothing during the day. If you're doing something, hey, look right there's the camera.

SPEAKER_06

Say hi to the camera.

SPEAKER_02

I need something to do. You're uh motorcycle? Motorcycle.

SPEAKER_00

I can't always wanted one.

SPEAKER_06

You should go buy one.

SPEAKER_00

My name's Aliana, I need a baker.

SPEAKER_06

And you're my what?

unknown

Oh.

SPEAKER_00

I'm by Steve Forever.

SPEAKER_06

We've got Steve Forever, that's right. When did we start? So if you don't like it, too bad. September? We started this the week of Labor Day. Okay, September. Okay.

SPEAKER_04

And we're having uh a ride this June.

SPEAKER_06

On the sixth.

SPEAKER_04

On the sixth. June sixth. Trying to get people just to show up. Um, how far away from home do you get before you say I'm gonna do it?

SPEAKER_06

Does he have a motorcycle?

SPEAKER_04

No, but he's thinking about it. He's always wanted one.

SPEAKER_02

I've always wanted one.

SPEAKER_06

You should buy one.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, it was like my mom uh used to be a uh surgical technician for Sparrow Hospital, and she worked in the emergency unit. Uh huh. She told me a lot of uh scary stories. It happens, it happens. So I was like, it's gonna be one of those things where I'm gonna have to wait until she passes.

SPEAKER_04

Not that we want that to hurry up.

SPEAKER_02

He's like, I love my mom.

SPEAKER_04

The whole reason I brought Joe over here is because I gotta go to the bathroom and I need you to talk to him.

SPEAKER_05

Okay.

SPEAKER_04

Because we can't have that air. If somebody's not sitting here, he won't talk.

SPEAKER_06

Hey, they can hear you say that. Oh. So so Brad is uh Brad's got a girl woman's bladder.

SPEAKER_02

A woman's bladder.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, which means he can't hold it very long. So then I have to I have to carry on the show without him.

SPEAKER_02

So yeah, well, one of the good things about being a uh truck driver is like you learn to hold it. You learn to hold it. You learn to hold it.

SPEAKER_06

I used to I used to drive truck. Oh I know, yeah.

SPEAKER_02

So I uh to help me pass times, sometimes I would rank bathrooms in the middle.

SPEAKER_06

You gotta talk in the microphone there.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, you're good.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

Welcome to the show. Uh to help me pass times sometimes while I'm on the road. Uh-huh. I would like rank bathrooms like how clean they are. Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Or if somebody shit all over the toilet seat and wiped it on it.

SPEAKER_02

Oh, yeah. I totally get it. The the bathroom on this uh uh speedway on the south side on Cedar.

SPEAKER_06

Terrible. Yeah, you're talking about the one by lows. Yes. Yes, yeah, yes, the one by lows. That motherfucker had more shit and semen speared all smeared all over the fucking seat than you could shake a stick at. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

If you've been on the road for about 12 hours and you gotta go, uh-huh, you you don't got much options.

SPEAKER_06

You just go you have to go when you're so how many times have you sat your bare ass on the smeared shit? That's what I want to know. Yeah, how many times? Once, twice?

SPEAKER_02

Well, I do remember one time at band camp.

SPEAKER_06

I knew it. I know hey, it happens to the best of us. It's not your fault.

SPEAKER_02

It's like when you're rushing.

SPEAKER_06

It's not it's not your fault.

SPEAKER_02

Hey, it's like you can only um my limit is I can only hold it for 12 hours. So when you have to, he's like, you do not care.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. Hey, when when duty calls.

SPEAKER_04

Oh yeah, when duty calls. Yeah, let me get back in there. Oh, yep.

SPEAKER_05

Is he in the service?

SPEAKER_06

Uh huh.

SPEAKER_05

Is he in the service?

SPEAKER_06

I don't know, but he he he he sat on a shitty toilet seat at the speedway, South Cedar.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

He's like, if you've been on the road for about 12 hours. We got a 12-hour limit. Yeah, no. You gotta go. It's either I'm shitting in my pants or shitting in my car or truck. I don't want to.

SPEAKER_06

And he's sitting in his truck, folks. He's gonna shit right in his fucking on the bathroom.

SPEAKER_03

You tell him about your bathroom in North Carolina? Oh no. My fucking thing was oozing. I had nowhere to go.

SPEAKER_02

And I opened the door and I remember one of my worst experiences is like I was down by the the border of Indiana and Michigan. Yeah. I was like so I was like, I drank about maybe maybe uh five Pepsi's before it was like 11 uh a.m.

SPEAKER_06

You had to go. I had to go.

SPEAKER_02

So I went to this gas station and I was like, hey uh, do you guys got a bathroom? And she goes, We're paying customers only.

SPEAKER_06

So you had to buy another Pepsi!

SPEAKER_02

Believe it or not, yeah. I know! I bought another another Pepsi and a bag of chips, and she gives me a key, so I rushed to uh rush to the bathroom. That was probably the most disgusting bathroom I've ever seen in my life. The toilet seat rocked back and forth. Half of the seat was missing. Oh no. By far like the worst smell I have ever smell. I was like, I spent two dollars for this. Right. Oh fuck yes.

SPEAKER_06

Well, you know what? You were the second guest ever. Oh, really? On Bob and Brad Perpetually Wrong. How does that feel?

SPEAKER_02

Uh uh.

SPEAKER_06

And you get a sticker to to go with it.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_06

Make sure you put that in a good place.

SPEAKER_02

Yep. I I will recommend this uh to all the guys at my shop and give us a list of it.

SPEAKER_06

Yeah, get on there. There's Facebook, like and follow. Follow on Facebook, subscribe.

SPEAKER_02

I don't have social media.

SPEAKER_06

Well, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_02

Oh less things for Big Brother to keep track on you all.

SPEAKER_06

I understand that. But you know what? Your brother, the one that sucks dick with a sore throat, I think he I think he's got social media. He does. Yeah, so make him like and subscribe. Alright. Thank you. Thank you for stopping by. Nice to meet you.

SPEAKER_03

Have a good night. Oh. What are you eating?

SPEAKER_02

Uh Billy cheesesteak. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_06

All right.

SPEAKER_02

I haven't had one in a minute, so I need one.

SPEAKER_06

Well, I hope it's delightful. If you ever fucking leave me like that again, I'll kill you.

SPEAKER_04

Could you repeat that? Because I couldn't.

SPEAKER_06

If you ever leave me like that again, I will kill you.

SPEAKER_04

I had to pee. Me too, but I'm holding it. I usually don't drink this much on a Thursday night.

SPEAKER_06

We had a fresh one right here.

SPEAKER_04

Oh.

SPEAKER_03

Alright. Well, are we about done?

SPEAKER_06

Yeah. On that note, Bob and Brad. Perpetually wrong. Oh, give me one of them.

SPEAKER_04

I gotta order some more.

SPEAKER_06

We're gonna we're gonna go ahead and end the session.

SPEAKER_04

Sign off. Sign.

SPEAKER_06

Sign off. Uh radio silent. Good night, whatever the fuck they call it.

SPEAKER_04

Good night, Irene. Yeah. But you you gotta say you're saying. As always. All right.

SPEAKER_06

Stay positive, test negative.

SPEAKER_03

Bye.