SPEAKER_00: Welcome to the Spray United Methodist Church Podcast.
SPEAKER_00: My name is Hoyt, and I'm so glad you're here.
SPEAKER_00: Today we're talking about something many believers are afraid to admit out loud doubt.
SPEAKER_00: And here's the truth I had to learn the hard way.
SPEAKER_00: Doubt is not the enemy.
SPEAKER_00: There were seasons in my life when doubt didn't just visit, it settled in.
SPEAKER_00: Not loudly, not all at once, it came quietly, almost politely.
SPEAKER_00: A thought here, a question there, and over time those thoughts began to stack up.
SPEAKER_00: I still believed in God, I still knew the stories, I still showed up.
SPEAKER_00: But something underneath it all had shifted.
SPEAKER_00: There was a whisper I couldn't seem to silence.
SPEAKER_00: What if you're wrong?
SPEAKER_00: What if this faith isn't real?
SPEAKER_00: What if God is tired of you?
SPEAKER_00: And those questions didn't make me angry, they made me uncertain.
SPEAKER_00: And uncertainty creates distance.
SPEAKER_00: I didn't walk away from church buildings, but I did drift away from closeness with Jesus.
SPEAKER_00: Prayer became shorter, then quieter, then less frequent.
SPEAKER_00: Reading scripture felt more like an obligation than a connection.
SPEAKER_00: And little by little, without even realizing it, I stopped bringing my heart honestly before God.
SPEAKER_00: Not rebellion, not rejection, just distance.
SPEAKER_00: A slow drifting that happened so quietly you don't even know how far you've gone.
SPEAKER_00: Looking back, I can see the mistake I made.
SPEAKER_00: I thought real Christians don't doubt.
SPEAKER_00: I thought faith meant never questioning, never struggling, never feeling unsure.
SPEAKER_00: So when doubt came, I didn't bring it to Jesus.
SPEAKER_00: I hid it.
SPEAKER_00: And what we hide grows.
SPEAKER_00: But Scripture tells a very different story.
SPEAKER_00: John the Baptist asked, Are you the coming one or do we look for another?
SPEAKER_00: The man who baptized Jesus had doubt.
SPEAKER_00: But he went to Jesus.
SPEAKER_00: He didn't hide him from him.
SPEAKER_00: He went straight out to him and asked.
SPEAKER_00: Thomas.
SPEAKER_00: Thomas needed to see the wounds before his doubt would go away.
SPEAKER_00: David cried out, Why, O Lord, do you stand far off?
SPEAKER_00: These are not weak men of faith.
SPEAKER_00: These are real people who brought real questions to a real God.
SPEAKER_00: And somewhere along my road something began to change.
SPEAKER_00: Not all at once, but clearly.
SPEAKER_00: I started to realize something simple but life-changing.
SPEAKER_00: Jesus was never afraid of my questions.
SPEAKER_00: Every time I turned, even slightly back toward Christ, I didn't find anger.
SPEAKER_00: I didn't find disappointment.
SPEAKER_00: I found open arms, like the Father running toward the prodigal son.
SPEAKER_00: My doubt had never been the real problem.
SPEAKER_00: The real danger was believing the lie.
SPEAKER_00: The doubt meant Jesus didn't want me anymore.
SPEAKER_00: Now when doubt comes, and it still does, I handle it differently.
SPEAKER_00: I don't run from Jesus.
SPEAKER_00: I run to Him.
SPEAKER_00: I bring the questions, I bring the uncertainty, I bring the parts of my heart that don't feel strong.
SPEAKER_00: And instead of distance, I find peace.
SPEAKER_00: Not because I suddenly have all the answers, but because I'm no longer facing the questions alone.
SPEAKER_00: Maybe you're listening right now and you're carrying questions of your own.
SPEAKER_00: Maybe your faith feels weaker than it used to.
SPEAKER_00: Maybe you feel like you've drifted farther than you ever intended.
SPEAKER_00: Hear this gently.
SPEAKER_00: You are not failing God.
SPEAKER_00: If your heart is still reaching for Him, even weakly, even through doubt, even through tears, that's reaching is faith.
SPEAKER_00: And the one you are reaching toward is already reaching toward you.
SPEAKER_00: Let us pray.
SPEAKER_00: Lord Jesus, for the ones listening who feel weak in faith today, be gentle with their heart.
SPEAKER_00: Turn their questions into deeper trust.
SPEAKER_00: Turn their wanderings into coming home.
SPEAKER_00: Turn their doubts into a doorway of peace and remind them that you are never afraid of an honest soul.
SPEAKER_00: Amen.
SPEAKER_00: Thank you for joining me on the Spray United Methodist Church podcast.
SPEAKER_00: If you do not have a church home, we invite you to worship with us at Spray United Methodist Church, located at eight oh three Morgan Road in Eden, North Carolina.
SPEAKER_00: We are a loving family who loves God and loves people.
SPEAKER_00: All people.