Organizations Don’t Collaborate - People Do

What if collaboration - not competition - is the key to building systems that actually work?

Join me as I sit down with Tiffany Loeffler, Executive Director of The Alliance, a nonprofit network working to support vulnerable children and families through collaboration across healthcare, social services, and community organizations.

After years of working inside systems meant to help families, Tiffany saw firsthand how siloed efforts, scarcity mindsets, and burnout limit real impact - even when people care deeply and are doing their best. As she so eloquently puts it: "organizations don’t collaborate - people do".

We talk about trust, leadership without hierarchy, building relationships across systems, and how tools like Working Genius can help teams collaborate more effectively and avoid burnout.

This is an honest conversation about leadership, collaboration, and what it takes to build social impact work that is both effective and sustainable.

You’ll Learn:

⭐ Why collaboration matters more than competition in social impact work
⭐ Why relationships are the foundation of effective systems of care
⭐ How nonprofit leaders can prevent burnout and compassion fatigue
⭐ What it means to build a legacy rooted in connection and shared responsibility

Key Insights:

Organizations Don’t Collaborate - People Do:
True collaboration happens through trust, vulnerability, and relationships.

Scarcity Undermines Impact:
When organizations operate from fear and competition, everyone loses - especially the people systems are meant to serve.

Trauma Requires Coordination:
Supporting children and families impacted by trauma requires aligned, cross-sector collaboration, not isolated interventions.

Sustainability Is a Leadership Skill:
Leaders must learn to set boundaries, delegate, and build complementary teams to stay effective for the long term.

Legacy Is Collective:
Lasting impact isn’t built alone - it’s created through systems and relationships that can grow beyond any one leader.

Timestamps:

[00:00:00] – Introduction: Why collaboration matters
[00:03:00] – Tiffany’s path from healthcare to nonprofit leadership
[00:07:00] – Adoption, trauma, and seeing gaps in the system
[00:12:00] – Scarcity mindset in nonprofit work
[00:18:00] – Building trust across organizations
[00:25:00] – Responding to crisis through collective action
[00:32:00] – Compassion fatigue, burnout, and boundaries
[00:38:00] – Leadership, delegation, and knowing your strengths
[00:44:00] – Opportunity cost, saying no, and sustainability
[00:46:00] – Legacy, collaboration, and long-term impact

Resources and Links:

Find host Kristin Belden on LinkedIn or at BeldenStrategies.com
Sign up for more conversations and insights at BeldenStrategies.com/newsletter

Connect with Tiffany Loeffler
Learn more about The Alliance and their collaborative work supporting children and families

Frameworks & Tools Mentioned in This Episode:
• The Working Genius - a strengths-based framework for understanding how people contribute, collaborate, and avoid burnout

If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, follow the show, and leave a review. And if you’re interested in more conversations about leadership, join my newsletter at BeldenStrategies.com/newsletter.

Transcript

Speaker 2: [00:00:00] Hi everyone. Welcome back to kind of a big Deal. I'm your host Kristin Buildin, and it's my true joy to bring you these conversations with incredible women doing meaningful work in the world. Today's conversation is with Tiffany Loeffler. Executive Director of the Alliance, a nonprofit network working across healthcare, social services, and community organizations to support vulnerable children and families.

Tiffany has spent years inside systems meant to help people, and she's seen how quickly good intentions can break down when organizations work in silos, compete for limited resources, or try to do this work alone. We talk about what collaboration really requires, trust, relationships, and shared responsibility.

And why organizations don't actually collaborate, people do. This is a conversation about leadership without hierarchy building systems that can hold people through hard things and what it takes to do social impact work in a way that's sustainable. Let's [00:01:00] dive in.



Speaker 4: Hi, Kristen. Good to see you. 

Speaker 3: Oh, it's so good to see you. Thank you so much for being with me today. I am so excited to have you here. 

Speaker 4: Oh, excited to be with you. 

Speaker 3: It's gonna be fun. Tiffany and I met through a mutual colleague and friend. By way of a really incredible local initiative here in Sacramento called the Sacramento Venture Philanthropy Network, and it's just a really incredible group of people that come together.

It's run by an incredible human named Brad Squires, and through that network, Scott T, who is on Tiffany's board sought to put us in touch and I'm so, so glad that he did. She is the type of woman who you can tell that she has. Something in her that is deeper than just what you're going to be receiving in those first few sentences of the conversation.

Um, and her story's incredible. The work she's doing is incredible. When we chatted the first time after, you know, hearing so [00:02:00] much power in her story, we found out that we went to high school together, which was. A surprise 

Speaker 4: world. I know. 

Speaker 3: And our high school wasn't even that big. I'm like, how did we not know each other?

It's so crazy. How did we not know? So Tiffany does really incredible, deeply impactful work. As the founder and executive director of the Alliance, which is a united movement of organizations working together to serve vulnerable kids and families in the greater Sacramento area. They launched about a decade ago and their stated mission is to prevent and heal childhood trauma by leveraging the power of collaboration, which I loved that when I read that because I thought, oh, what a beautifully succinct way.

This work is so layered and so deep and there's so many factors that to be able to pull it together in one concise sentence, I can't imagine the work y'all had to do to get there. 

Speaker 4: Team approach [00:03:00] for sure. And it wasn't our initial like inaugural mission statement. We got a lot of clarity as we've gone along in the last decade.

So 

Speaker 3: yes, 

Speaker 4: super happy 

Speaker 3: to do. I can imagine. I really just can't wait to dig in. There's so much. To learn from your story and from your work. So I think let's start for you with present day. Tell us more about the alliance and what is the current focus of your work. 

Speaker 4: Absolutely. Well, there are a lot of vulnerable kids around the world, but as we were looking specific to the Sacramento region, California has one of the highest number of kids in foster care in the nation, and there's over 2000 kids just locally.

In our foster care system, there's a lot of other vulnerable populations of kids. We have a large homeless population. Sacramento is the number two resettlement site for Afghan refugee families and the number three resettlement site for Ukrainian refugees nationwide. There are kids that are going through bullying that have experienced divorce in their families.

There's just a lot of disruptions in [00:04:00] our culture. For kids. And we're recognizing also that all of the resilient factors of connected relationships and being off screens are not really there. And so as a network, um, we are partnering with the agencies, the nonprofits, the professionals serving vulnerable kids and church ministries around the area because we know that there's actually a lot of front lines helpers.

They just weren't necessarily working in connected ways. And a lot of times they operate in silos. And so what the alliance does is it brings those groups together. We recognized that organizations don't partner together, people do. So one of our foremost things is to bring people into collaborative spaces, whether at, um, networking events, appreciation events, online platforms, like we want to make sure that all the helpers know each other.

So that they can share resources and ideas, maybe volunteers or funding, or at least cross refer. So if they are serving a vulnerable child or a family and they don't provide those resources in-house, they know who does and they can quickly [00:05:00] get kids and families to the right source for mental health, for housing, for food, uh, for wraparound care, and then we're reducing gaps in our entire system.

Speaker 3: That's amazing. I mean, I feel like there must have been some interesting. Learnings for you to even arrive at this work, right? To, to recognize that there are these silos, and that's also not uncommon in the nonprofit space, right? This can happen where it's not intentional necessarily, but there's great folks doing great work that don't know about the great work that the great folks are doing.

You know, just down the street. 

Speaker 4: All of us have a tendency for some tunnel vision. Like we get excited about our mission and our programs and our resources Yes. And the population we serve, and sometimes we don't look up and we just need to set aside maybe only 5% of our time to do that. And so we're, we're capitalizing on that 5%.

Speaker 3: Tell me more about those early days of what you were seeing that really. [00:06:00] What was the inspiration for even starting something like the Alliance? I understand that you, you saw the challenge. What were those early days like and what were you, did you have any idea that this is what you were building toward?

If you could look 10 years ago. 

Speaker 4: Oh, so a little back information. I have been in the healthcare sector for 19 years. I am an outpatient orthopedic physical therapist, and I still treat patients one day a week because I absolutely love that avenue of my career. Um, I also had a huge passion for vulnerable kids because I grew up in an amazing family.

I had been given a huge gift with parents that, um, did not get divorced. I had a really stable childhood, really loving family. Extended family was great. I recognized even in middle school and high school that not all of my friends had that. And so I don't take that lightly or for granted. And so when my husband and I got married, we started talking about having a family and adoption actually became plan a.

As we proceeded [00:07:00] to say, what does our family look like and how many kids we wanna have, we actually started the international adoption process in 2011 to adopt two kids from Haiti. So our oldest two are adopted, they're now 19 and 22. But through that process, and it was quite a long wait, we had no idea.

We were diving into the deep end of a very complicated international adoption. The orphanage our kids were in turned out to be a human trafficking ring, and there was all, oh 

Speaker 3: wow. 

Speaker 4: Um, red tape and challenges and government corruption. That slowed things down. But as I was able to wait and advocate for our two kids to come home, I also recognized that Sacramento has a lot of kids in need.

There's a lot of local kids that are struggling, and so we kind of. First stepped into this space through our church at the time, through a ministry we were leading for foster, adoptive, and at-risk kids, where we offered a mentoring program, a clothing closet, a monthly support group. We advocated for people in the church to get involved.

We did donation drives, all sorts of things. 'cause I recognized then [00:08:00] that not everyone's called to foster or adopt. Not everyone's called to wrap around a refugee family, but there's something we all could be doing to support the kids and families struggling in our community. Mm. So it, the Alliance really was kind of an offshoot of several conversations.

When, um, I was leading that ministry, we made connections with local foster agencies, with local nonprofits in Placer County, right around the church. And we said, how can we support you? Through that vulnerability and trust that was built over years of partnership, I started to get the behind the scenes of what it looked like to be a nonprofit leader.

And it was, it was heartbreaking to hear the amount of competition. 

Speaker 3: Yeah. 

Speaker 4: It's into the helping sector thinking that they're going to go head to head against other organizations, but the reality is every nonprofit needs two things to survive. They need people and they need funding. There tends to be a scarcity mindset if you've been in the nonprofit space for long.

And so if there's limited funding and limited people, you get kind of protective of those two things, and that can [00:09:00] sometimes create some friction between other organizations or other leaders. And so that's really my passion is to support leaders. I wanna make sure that if I'm viewing this whole network of care for Vulnerable kids as the thousand piece puzzle, I wanna make sure that we have all the pieces.

All the pieces are connected to the ones they need to be connected to, and that we don't lose any out of the box. There are gaps in the system. The government agencies that are working really hard, child protective services and all of the other support systems are amazing, but they can't do it all. They need the nonprofits, they need the professionals, but there's, there's still gaps.

And so really the alliance just, um, it formed out of initial coffee meetings that turned into a couple vision casting meetings that turned into some large brainstorming rooms where I had 60 leaders and we were saying. We don't wanna duplicate efforts. Mm-hmm. We don't wanna recreate the wheel, but what would it look like if we actually circled the wagons and all of the organizations and leaders serving could have a seat at the table and we could all work together on the same team.

So that's really 10 years ago, what launched this idea of the Alliance? And we aren't like any [00:10:00] other. You know, bridge Network or organization nationwide. We're kind of doing our own thing here in Sacramento. Mm-hmm. And so I don't have any blueprints, but I do do a lot of training. I, I glean ideas, um, and new program concepts from all over.

And so we get to put it together in what works best for us here in the Sacramento area. 

Speaker 3: That's amazing. I'm curious too, you know, I, I'm, I was nodding vigorously at the like, scarcity mindset piece because, you know, I was a nonprofit for. Many years, and that was always the, that was one of the frustrations, right?

For instance, when I was in journalism, nonprofit journalism, there's like a handful of funders and foundations that every other journalism organization is going after funding, right? And which makes sustainability nearly impossible, or it's like a constant fight. You're in survival mode always because you're like, well, I can't think big.

Really, because I have to make sure that I'm taking care of my day to day. I have to make sure that I've got my [00:11:00] staff staff deck. And so over the years, have you seen that the Alliance allows for some of that kind of like holding close. To be released a little bit. Was it right away that everyone came together like, okay, we're doing this, or have you seen that maybe mature over the years that you've been doing this?

Speaker 4: It takes time to build trust, to build vulnerabilities. So yes, I would definitely say at the beginning, those early onboarders were people. I was in close relationships, so I had already built. Some, some credibility and some trust with them. And there's people that just, um, like to think collaboratively. So usually they're like, oh, they hear this model, and they're like, I can get on board with that.

I would be happy to share resources and ideas. I'd be happy to hop on a think tank. I'd be happy to co-author a grant or co-host a fundraiser. So we've seen those things happen. I also, we work with leaders all the time that have had big, deep wounds. Leadership hurts that have had things go wrong, that have had ideas stolen or staff taken or other things, and it [00:12:00] takes a little bit more time.

Speaker 3: Yeah. 

Speaker 4: I think that the beauty of the alliance is that now almost a decade in, we're not going anywhere. We're not phased by anything. We kind of joke all the time. Most people have seen the farmer's commercials where they say, we know a thing or two because we've seen a thing or two. 

Speaker 3: Yeah. 

Speaker 4: Like that. The alliance can resonate with that quite a bit.

Like that's easy success that they're going through. And then we can help to deescalate and we can invite them back into conversation or we can connect them with the right people. We can remind them that this is not a taking, it's not a what's in it for me, it's what's in it for the collective. Hmm. And there's gonna be, I'm gonna benefit from somebody's idea or resource or.

Or support system. And there's other times I'm gonna give an idea or a resource or a support system to someone else. Yeah. And so, and there's that reciprocation. And when there's that, I'm gonna see this person again. I'm gonna see this person quarterly. If I come to all of the Alliance member gatherings, I'm going to see this person at some of the other events in the community, I'm gonna develop a friendship with them.

Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that. Have [00:13:00] you seen too, does it allow, I mean, after 10 years of witnessing the work that's happening. And how people are coming together. I might imagine that there's also then challenges that, right? Like you all didn't emerge in a vacuum because there are these major systemic challenges and issues that y'all are facing.

But is there a problem or challenge that you saw that couldn't be addressed by one organization that like it really has taken folks coming together to address it or has something new come up because. There's power in these partnerships where it's like, oh, we wouldn't have even thought that we could dive into that.

But now that we're together, is there anything that you've seen come up over the years? 

Speaker 4: I think there's policy changes and challenges all the time. Mm-hmm. And these are the things that you don't anticipate or you don't expect. And I can think of two right off the bat. A couple years ago there was a large insurance provider that provided basically organizational insurance to [00:14:00] over 80% of the foster family agencies in the state of California.

Mm-hmm. And California tends to be litigious and they also extended the age. Of which former foster youth could sue the state and or their foster family agency, they extended the age to like 25. Mm-hmm. And so all of a sudden Sure. Providers said that there's too much risk for us to take, we're pulling out of the state of California.

And so, oh wow. Very short notice all of those agencies who are the backbone and the support system for all the kids in the foster care system, um, was that those organizations couldn't retain their license in California without proof of insurance, and they no longer were gonna have insurance. 

Speaker 3: Oh my gosh.

Speaker 4: Seeing those leaders let us know that that was a challenge. Connect with each other. Um, some of them, because of the connections they've made at past alliance events, others through introductions that we made, were able to figure out solutions to parcel up programs to connect with the insurance companies that did still service California.

Um, most of them kept their doors open and most of them are still placing kids right now because [00:15:00] they were, they had phone calls they could make. 

Speaker 3: That's amazing. 

Speaker 4: So that was huge. But the beginning of 2025, there was huge budget cuts for refugees. The political system, and we're not gonna get into whether it's right or wrong.

Speaker 3: Yes, we 

Speaker 4: can, 

Speaker 3: we can. 

Speaker 4: There, there was limited funding for refugees that were coming into the country, and some that were already here had absolutely no funding at all. Right? And so usually there was government funding for refugee families for the first 90 days that covered housing and food, just so they could get their, you know, their feet on the ground and somebody in the family could get a job.

That being said, there was major layoffs in the refugee space less than a year ago for all of those organizations. Yet their needs were even higher than normal because now there wasn't government funding for some of those basic necessities, and so those organizations could also. Rely heavily on connections they had made with maybe local churches or maybe community service groups, and they're getting [00:16:00] clothing met, they're getting food delivered, they're getting other resources provided to their families, and they're restabilizing and structuring their organizations with a smaller staff.

Um, so things like that, none of us can prepare for the storm that's gonna hit, but when the storm does hit, we need those relational connections and those avenues into the community that are already built in advance. We can't make them as we go. And so I feel like that we get to do that on a regular basis so that we're interconnected and that their challenge isn't isolated.

It's, it's part of our whole collective and part of the community. 

Speaker 3: That's amazing. I have a dear, dear friend who has worked for many years in the Afghan resettlement space here locally. And yeah, to talk about, you know, what, what a uniquely, deeply difficult, emotionally challenging space to be working in.

It is. Um, to, to know that you all are playing a role in finding ways to wrap folks [00:17:00] up. That's just incredible. I'm curious for you, there's been, as, as we're talking about the, the impact and the deepness of this work, a pattern that I've kind of noticed throughout some of my conversations with other incredible women doing.

Social impact work, working in these really, really challenging spaces. These chosen paths are not for the weary I, these are, I should say. And so, um, one of the women who I, I was just really struck by how young she realized that she needed to make sure that she protected her own health and her own. I hate self-care.

We gotta find a different word for it, but like, you know, whatever We wanna say that making sure that she prioritized her own needs amidst this acknowledgement that there are so many with needs in the spaces that you all are working in. She was like, if I'm doing this for the long term, which I know I want [00:18:00] to, she had a very clear vision at a very young age.

She's like, if that's the deal, then I, I cannot burn myself out. I won't be able to for, from an empty vessels. Um, wondering if that resonates and if so, you know, how you kind of navigate that for yourself. 

Speaker 4: The two terms that come to mind immediately as you're sharing that are compassion, fatigue and secondary trauma.

Speaker 3: Yeah. And 

Speaker 4: on behalf of both of those terms, in a helping space, we have to show up with our hearts. We have to, we have to care about the person that's sitting right in front of us and their hardships. We have to have empathy, we have to have, um, deep levels of, of. Compassion to listen well and to help well.

Speaker 3: Mm-hmm. 

Speaker 4: And if we don't show up with our hearts, then we can end up being, um, people become projects and tasks and checklists. But like you said, there is that heavy load when you bear someone else's burden. And then some of the challenges have long-term, like long-term impacts. And it's [00:19:00] not a quick fix when it comes to people and trauma and brokenness in our world.

And so we have to know how to set up our own boundaries around our hearts so that we can still show up mm-hmm. As our full and connected self. But we also can go back to those places of, oh, that was a really hard day, or a really hard story to listen to. I might need to take a walk. I might need to be out in nature.

I might need to, um, set up some rhythms in my life of decompression. Yeah, I think self-care is absolutely needed in any kind of helping space, any kind of people space, really as your audience, all as female leaders, we have a lot of empathy and compassion built in for most of us. And so we need to steward that really, really well and really cautiously, um, the secondary trauma is taking in somebody else's story that wasn't your own, but going to a place in yourself that has experienced fear or uncertainty or grief.

If we tap into those places, we can better connect with that person. But it also taps into those places in us where we have to be healed. So, I mean, I'm a [00:20:00] huge proponent of counseling. I'm a huge proponent of knowing the things that fill me back up and making that. I'm trying to get those, I've had to set up some pretty good boundaries of work life space, like personal space versus workspace.

What's really hard is I've silenced all notifications on my phone. 

Speaker 3: Same 

Speaker 4: comes through. I don't have any social media notifications to my phone. If I'm home, I'm home. I don't really give out my cell phone number to people. I know a lot of people put it on their business cards. The number on my contact list is my office number for that reason that I'll call you back the next time I'm in the office.

I love 

Speaker 3: that 

Speaker 4: I have to do that. 'cause if I'm home with my family as a mom and as what, I cannot be pulled into all of the tyranny of the urgent. Yes. And then you're helping spaces and there's life, um, not life threatening. Like I'm not, I mean, I'm not, it's not a 9 1 1 call, but these are major emotional situations, whether it's for organizational leaders or for the [00:21:00] populations they're serving.

It has to allow, I have to engage with that when I'm in a head and a mind space, like a head and heart space that I'm prepared, 

Speaker 3: yes. 

Speaker 4: Ready to help, as opposed to it can hit me at any time and I'm not ready. 

Speaker 3: Yes. There's so much wisdom in that. I think I've, I've heard that too from the women I've met a, a woman I met recently, she's a DA in Stockton for the homicide unit.

Speaker 4: Oh. 

Speaker 3: And I was asking her something similar of like, how do you, how do you not Yeah, it is a lot. It's a, it's a very intense role and. She was saying, well, there's, you know, I, I work in Stockton and I live in Sacramento and I've heard this from other folks that work in law enforcement where it's, you know, the idea of being in the community that you serve.

Everybody has a different philosophy here, but the one I'm interested in speaking to now is what I've heard from some, it's really important that where they do their work is not in the community that they're walking in every day. And that's not exactly what you're saying, but I do think there's something really interesting and [00:22:00] important of.

Okay, well then your physical boundary is your phone and your office. And for people that don't have an office or an office line, right? Maybe you get a second line or find a way to, you know, have Oh, 

Speaker 4: voice's free, 

Speaker 3: whatever. I think that that is so important and it's so people say, it's not like everything easier said than done.

It can sound so simple, but it doesn't mean it's easy. It can still be. Tricky to maintain those boundaries or the systems that you've created. Did you know pretty early on that you needed to set those up for yourself, or was that like a trial by fire? 

Speaker 4: I think I've always been like a, I'm a type A firstborn, so I'm a little bit like, 

Speaker 3: I 

Speaker 4: like structure a lot, and so when I can create structure, even when I was choosing professions in the healthcare field, I'm like, I want one that's not on call.

Yeah, I had good boundaries. Like when social media kicked off and like we were in [00:23:00] college and MySpace rolled around. I'm like, those aren't real friends. Those are just connections that people feel like good about that. They're like, 

Speaker 3: wow. 

Speaker 4: Don't, like, 

Speaker 3: oh my God. That's very insightful. Very insightful for being so young.

I loved MySpace. I loved me some Tom. 

Speaker 4: Things did Like it was none of it. I mean, I'm on Facebook, I'm on Instagram now, but they're not like my, my ghost. 

Speaker 3: Totally. Yes, yes. Same. So you've always kind of had that for yourself. That's incredible. I think that's not always the case. Some of us have to like really find ways to, to do that for ourselves.

And so anytime that I can offer up a suggestion by way of the amazing women I'm chatting with, I think it's so great to hear from others who. How set things up that work for them, because sometimes we just need to hear someone saying it. Say it again. 

Speaker 4: Yeah. With the spontaneity level, some people thrive off of like the spontaneous text they get or the information or the invitation.

They're like, yes, [00:24:00] I am at the other end of aspect where I don't love surprises and I don't love to be spontaneous. I actually really like to plan things so far in advance that I, they look, I look forward to them for months and months and months. 

Speaker 3: Oh, I love that. That's so cool. 

Speaker 4: Professionally that we just like to see each other every six months.

And so we have coffee and then we put something six months down the road and have another coffee. And then I look forward to it the whole time. 'cause I know it's on my calendar, my God, or not know themselves. Like that's how I thrive. And then other people thrive by loving the spontaneity. And so I'm not that my suggestion works for my personality type.

Speaker 3: Totally. I was just gonna say. For anybody that's getting anxiety, just hearing that I'm with you, like, I'm like, if I had to schedule something six months, I'd be like, well, I don't know what I'm gonna be doing in six months 

Speaker 4: each throat. 

Speaker 3: Yes. But I think that that's what's so cool about these chats is everybody gets to hear something that will resonate for them that might give them a little bit of an idea or something to percolate a little bit around.

[00:25:00] Like, what, what could that look like for them if they're seeking something, um, for you. Not only are you in this intense work and having so much impact, it's so, it's exciting to me because as we talk about legacy, so much of what you're building, and we'll get here at the end of our chat, but it's when you are doing this level of local impactful work, right?

Like you are leaving your, and you might not say it this way, so I wanna be mindful here, but. Because I know this isn't about you, it's about the work. But there is something about the fact that you are the founder and executive director of something that will leave and continue to have an incredible impact in the communities that you live and serve, um, as the executive director.

Outside of all of that, there's also just the reality of what it means to manage an organization on the day to day. [00:26:00] And I would love to hear from you, has there been anything that's been surprising to you as you've built this thing? I mean, and that's a big question that could take, you could take it so many different ways, but specifically in your role as an ed, if there's anyone out there that's either thinking about starting a nonprofit or is.

Going to step into the helm of leadership at a nonprofit. Anything that you would wanna share that you've learned along the way? 

Speaker 4: Absolutely. First of all, I just wanna say that this is such a humbling role. I just, I don't take it for granted to watch something that started as an idea and was spoken into by so many people.

Like we've only built what other people, what the community has asked for. Yeah. But we have to keep innovating and we have to keep growing and I love getting to use my skillsets to, to do that. This is also the hardest job I've ever had. 

Speaker 3: Yeah. 

Speaker 4: Yeah. So, you know, there's a little bit more prescriptive nature to being [00:27:00] in healthcare.

And I have my doctorate in healthcare, A lot of education, a lot of training went into to making me ready to be a very good physical therapist. And I enjoy that space 'cause there's a lot more, um, you know, A plus B equals C, even everybody's body's different. In the nonprofit space, A plus B plus C does not always equal de and f.

And so it's, it 

Speaker 3: might equal like 1300. Who knows? Yeah. 

Speaker 4: It does require a capacity and a tolerance for change. It requires an innovation for sure. I feel like if any of your listeners have heard about the Working Genius, which is tool from Patrick Lencioni that talks about how you like to get work done and the stages of work, um, one of them is invention.

So we have to innovate to stay ahead of the curve, especially as a leader of leaders. The alliance gets to be a place of collaboration and a place of support, but we wanna be ahead of the curve a little bit so that we know how to best support and advance the mission of our entire [00:28:00] network. And so we have.

To be very, as a team, there's, there's eight people on staff here, but myself as the leader, we have to be very aware of what are the trends in funding? What are the trends in our community? What are the trends for vulnerable youth? What are the changes in policy that are coming through? And then how do we best serve given that information?

And so it's fun because each year we get to create new resources, new programs, innovative solutions. We have a significant blend here at the Alliance of Technology and people. As I mentioned, people actually need to be face-to-face, preferably in person in order to build trust and vulnerability. But that doesn't mean we don't use technology significantly because the only way to scale things is to bring technology in and a little AI mixed with quite a few Ws, lots of software.

That we use here at the Alliance, whether it's for our needs database, where people can go on and look for volunteer opportunities or donation item needs, whether it's for connection. And we've built a whole platform for our alliance member community where they can, you know, member directory, member [00:29:00] map, they can post questions, ideas, share resources with each other.

It's basically like a hub of connection that's 365 days a year. But we have to, we have to constantly look towards. Where our network is going and what they might need before they need it. Hmm. So for me, as Peter, I, it has taken a lot of recognizing that I don't have the solutions, but I can tap on a lot of people.

Um, I have an amazing network of people in the business sector, people in the funding sector, people in the nonprofit sector, that I have a one step connection to a lot of things. And I also never feel like I'm gonna arrive. 

Speaker 3: Yeah, 

Speaker 4: to not have, I mean, there are programs you launch and then they're launched.

There's a bench that you host and then they're done. But for the most part, the nonprofit space is a very significant continuum. I think that's been the hardest to wrap my head around. Yeah. Um. In a lot of other sectors, it's project based work or you know, other things that have a [00:30:00] deadline. And in the nonprofit sector, people are not a project, as I mentioned earlier.

So this is a space where it's a continuum and I have to learn how to find those seasons of rest. And like I said before, shut it down when I go home 'cause I wanna be fresh the next day. And so it's a special place to be in the nonprofit world 'cause it engages my head and my mind and I love to strategic plan.

But it also is constantly engaging my heart because that piece of the stories that we're hearing of leaders trying not to burn out or the kids and families they're serving that need support, like those still, like I can still be brought to tears by those stories and I'm so glad that I still can. 

Speaker 3: Oh wow.

That's a beautiful way of saying that. What a balance between that head and the heart of knowing that you have the things that you need to do every day, but allowing yourself to still be Absolutely. Just blessed and taken by the stories of the people that you're serving. I think that's what makes you such an incredible leader.

That is not [00:31:00] always what you get to witness. There are folks who lead with their heart always. You can sometimes forget about the need for a strategy and structure and the things that are required. Um, or you do have folks that lead with people as projects and as numbers and forget about. The human side of why they started the thing in the first place.

So for you to find yourself 10 years in holding both with such care, it just, it's really striking for you as the EV also, or just in general, not just as the ed, but in launching this thing and building in, honing it. Is there anything that you've found surprising about yourself along the way that you were like, oh, I didn't know that.

It sounds like you know yourself quite well, but I'm always curious if there's something that someone's maybe been interested to find out about themselves as they've built. 

Speaker 4: I, maybe it's just highlighted more that I, I absolutely love people, but I have to [00:32:00] fight to put people equal to process. 

Speaker 3: Mm. Mm-hmm.

Speaker 4: I'd love to get stuff done. Again in the work in Genius, I'm a tenacity person, so like, let's move the project forward, let's get the result, let's make sure that we launch things on time. Let's do things really well the first time. And so it's carrying that balance of like, and also I really, really love to be in relationship with the people that are doing that with me.

And so, oh. 

Speaker 3: Mm-hmm. 

Speaker 4: Like deep connection, deep friendship. We have a really great internal culture on our team where we all champion each other and we know each other really well on a personal level. Mm-hmm. Um, so that we could be that internal support system. But at the end of the day, we also wanna show up really well.

As an organization and execute really well. And so some of my perfectionism tendencies have come out and I've learned more about, like, I don't project my capabilities or my expectations onto other people, I just get to hold them for myself. 

Speaker 3: Yeah. You hear something done sometimes, but yes. [00:33:00] 

Speaker 4: Done. I think it's just great to learn how to work as a team.

Mm-hmm. Um, I also, I think the thing that I, I've learned even more over the years is delegation. And finding people's sweet spot. Like when someone's in their sweet spot, I feel really comfortable delegating to them. When somebody's not, 

Speaker 3: yes, 

Speaker 4: then it really is hard as a leader to hand off anything. And so I think that the reality is, it's a little bit interesting in our current day and age for people, I've seen a wave of people who don't know what they're really good at.

Who or who, um, think that they have to take on a role that has X, Y, and Z as its requirements and its job duties. But if that's not their sweet spot, then it tends to create a disconnect for themselves and self-awareness, but it also tends to create a disconnect for anyone around them. So learning to discern people's skill sets, learning to invite them to explore their own and to own their own.

And yes, we all have parts of our job that are like, they just have to get done. 

Speaker 3: Sure. 

Speaker 4: But the reality is we should all be in a role that fits most of our [00:34:00] skill sets really, really well. So it's life giving at the end of the day. And so it's just, um. I think the hardest part about being a nonprofit leader is the HR component of like, 

Speaker 3: yeah, 

Speaker 4: finding the right people, training the right people, retaining the right people, and then staying really connected as a team.

And so we're doing it, but it, it's definitely a challenge. 

Speaker 3: Yes. That is impactful work. You know, human driven work. I think the company I was with before I started off on my own, we talked all the time about the hard work. Didn't feel hard 'cause we got to do it alongside each other, right? It was, we were in the trenches and we were digging deep, but having the best time amidst some really, really, really tricky, challenging work that, because we wanted to be in the foxhole with each other, right?

That work feels really hard and heavy. If you're doing it along too many alongside, too many people that aren't in their sweet spot. So it's so important, I think, to have a vision and a view of the team in that way. You mentioned that some [00:35:00] folks you're seeing that they're having difficulty finding that sweet spot or even knowing what they're good at.

I'm interested in this because I think. This is not a uniquely female experience by any stretch, but I do think that there has been, again, this kind of through line in a lot of the conversations I've had with women where it's like, well, they made themselves really good at certain things in order to continue to move forward or to get the role or to land at the table.

And then it took either a big life event or something that forced them to pause or speaking for a friend, right? Like it took these things. To really kind of like whack you over the head and go, wait a second. You have been building and living a life or wound up in a career that is really not necessarily based on your true strengths.

You got really good at them because you could get good at them. Doesn't mean it's where you're meant to shine. And so I wonder if you have a perspective on [00:36:00] how. Women in particular can start to peel back those layers a bit. If they find themselves in a moment going, oh shoot, I actually don't know if this is what my sweet spot is.

Perhaps it is utilizing a tool like you just shared, but any other thoughts on kind of what you would suggest? 

Speaker 4: Absolutely. Well, I'll share, I'll share a tool and a non tool perspective. Okay. Uh, working Genius tool is a really quick and easy assessment that people can go through. And then you're basically, the prescription is, you have two geniuses, two competencies, and two frustrations.

Mm-hmm. I don't think it's as quick cut and dry as that. Sure. Several things more than two that gave me life. So that your geniuses are the things that if you're doing them, they're like really pouring into you and you feel energized. Your competencies are things that you can do. You certainly have the capabilities and you can expand your competency in them.

But they're neutral. And then the frustrations are also things you can do and you can learn to get really good at them, but they drain you of [00:37:00] energy. 

Speaker 3: Yeah. 

Speaker 4: And so we all have those things. And so just going through that tool allowed the perspective of I don't have to be good at everything. 

Speaker 3: Everything, right?

Yes. The things 

Speaker 4: that I'm not, I can look specifically to surround myself with people who that brings them joy. That brings them fuel. And so when I delegate something in that category that I feel heavy doing, I feel like, I think we tend to get a perspective that we project ourselves onto other people because we are in our own minds all the time.

Speaker 3: Yeah. 

Speaker 4: This feels like a lot for me. Sometimes I would feel bad handing it off to somebody else because then I'm thinking, if I can't do it, then why am I gonna make someone else do it? But then when I realized that someone else would actually enjoy doing it, and I wouldn't, it was a lot easier to give myself the reprieve of saying, oh, it's okay that I, this is not my, my sweet spot.

And if it is someone else's, then I'm giving them a gift to delegate to them. Um, and they're operating in their strengths. [00:38:00] So I feel like that. Really been helpful for me, um, as looking at that tool of wonder invention, discernment, galvanizing, enablement and tenacity are the six geniuses. And again, everybody has a different combination.

Speaker 3: Mm-hmm. 

Speaker 4: Um, but it also helps you get some projects done if you know what your team or the people around you, what geniuses they have. Just in the perspective of not using a tool, I think that we need to have people close enough in our lives, and it might be a spouse or a best friend or a very close coworker.

That can reflect back to you and give you feedback. 

Speaker 3: Mm. 

Speaker 4: We put ourselves in feedback environments often enough, and then we don't know how to receive it. When somebody finally ventures into the very vulnerable space of giving us unrequested feedback, and if we put ourselves in those positions to ask for feedback from people we trust, then they can reflect into us what, like, like my husband has told me many, many times, I think you're in a season where you need to say no to more things.

I see [00:39:00] a little bit burdened or a little stressed or coming home late repeatedly or other things like there's been seasons of that. And then he's really able to have the wisdom to say, what's the next few things you can say no to? And he's doing, um, not for his own agenda, he just wants me to come home.

The best version of myself. Yeah. Um, I think when we have close friendships, close relationships personally and professionally, and we invite those people to say, what do you see in me? What are my strengths? Hey, hey, I have a best friend and she knows the things that bring me life. 'cause I tell her about 'em and she's like, I just heard the joy in your voice, or you just seem really energized after coming off of, I love public speaking.

So she'll be like, you killed it. And you just really enjoyed it. Like some people don't like, like I can see you really like that. So I just, I feel like when people can tell us what we're good at, we don't have to have the even operating in a vacuum. I think I'm good or I think this is my strength. You can ask other people.

Speaker 3: Yes. It's so apparent when you're operating from a [00:40:00] place of flow or ease or you know, these things that are just inherent strengths of ours and those that are close to us can see when we're operating from that space versus when we're operating from a place of anything else that is not aligned. I think that's an interesting, I have a very dear, dear friend who I left a voice note for recently and I said, okay.

Here are the things that I'm going into this year really wanting to hold myself accountable to just as it relates to continuing to even unpack that for myself and how I want to see this year, how I wanna show up in this year. And so what I asked of them was, okay, you know me well enough, to your point, choosing the people that we trust to speak into these spaces is also incredibly important.

Speaker 4: Yes, 

Speaker 3: these cannot not be people that you do not, you know, that do not know you on a very soul like core level because it's also really easy to speak into other people that you may not actually have their, um, it, it could be that you have their best interest in mind, but you're not actually aligned with who they fully, truly are.[00:41:00] 

So wisely and yes, feedback. And I think on top of that, it's. Now also help hold me accountable to staying true to that thing, right? If I am saying, yes, I hear you, and that feedback resonates, then here are the things to your point with your spouse, okay? Then here are the things I'm gonna say no to, and I need you as my partner to help hold me accountable to that.

It's really not easy to do that. I think sometimes it requires a really significant amount of vulnerability to say, I know I still have things I am working on, and I know that even when I do my very, very best and I set my intentions and I. Say, I'm gonna have boundaries that like inevitably life happens and things creep in, and we need somebody to kind of be there to help buoy us a little bit.

I think so. I love that. And it goes both ways. You then also, I imagine, get to speak in for him some of the things that maybe he needs to hear as well. So, um, I love, 

Speaker 4: it's a cycle. Just this morning, [00:42:00] yesterday, a wonderful offer landed in my inbox and it's gonna be a no for me because I just don't have capacity to say yes to anything new.

That requires a lot of time, but I had to let it know. By the way, I received this email. This was the offer. Just so you know, I'm gonna say no. 

Speaker 3: I said no. And he was like, yes, let's go. Yeah. 

Speaker 4: Yeah. In order to be accountable, we also have to be vulnerable and circle back on the things. Yes. That people getting feedback.

We want to be a good receiver of the feedback and a good relational counterpart. So 

Speaker 3: yes, 

Speaker 4: and if I say yes to something, I do wanna tell 'em, Hey, I said yes to this and here's why. Here's why. Here's where I'm gonna make the time, here's why this was really important. And he gets to know me better that way.

Speaker 3: Yes. And you yourself, right in answering those questions to yourself, the why is it a yes and the why. Is it a no? I think. It's so we were talking before we started recording as women leaders. It can be really tricky. We wanna say yes to all the things, right? It is something inherent, I think, in many of us, to [00:43:00] want to hold it all and to do it all and to lean in, and especially those of us of a certain age or generation where it was like, yeah, you do, you say yes to the things and you move and you hold and you own.

And to hone that a little bit and say, okay, wait a second. I don't actually need to hold all of these things or hold this thing on behalf of someone else. It can feel a little daunting at first, but when you start to get into the practice, I have found it to be incredibly empowering 'cause it allows me to then also go, wait, the only real value I can provide is when I'm showing up with presence and actual, you know, my awareness and authenticity.

I can't do that when I'm stretched too thin and when I'm giving of myself in too many different places. If I say yes to all these committees and all these things, then like, I'm gonna not. I'm gonna be showing up as a face on the screen, not as somebody who's actively invested in the thing in front of me.

And so it sounds counterintuitive at first 'cause you're like, but I'm supposed to say yes to all this stuff. And sometimes I think you have [00:44:00] to go through a season like that to figure out what you wanna say yes to. Yes. Once you get to that point where you get to start saying yes and no, it's pretty amazing.

Speaker 4: To your point, everything that we do to show up fully for the meeting or the person or the situation or the task that's in front of us means saying no to 10 other things. And we've all heard that before, but I think when I wanna touch on that, I had to wrestle with myself, is that the saying, yes has an opportunity cost.

So, for example, in my own life, my phone is my kryptonite a little bit. I often don't know where it is and people cannot reach me, including the most important people in my life because my ringer's never on 

Speaker 3: i 

Speaker 4: the phone ever. So if you call me, I don't, I'm not answering, I, I probably will check a text message, but it might be hours later.

And some of that is because of the nature of my work. If I'm in meetings, I am 100% present with that person. I am not. Listening for my phone, it's not even in the room. If I am [00:45:00] treating physical therapy patients, I don't check my phone for four to five hours at a time, and that has to be okay. And so it's hard because then like my kids and my husband know, they might not be able to reach me with an urgent task.

The person that's getting called, if my toddler at preschool needs something as my husband every time. 

Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah. 

Speaker 4: But allows me the gift that I'm giving, the person I sit across from, or the person that I'm supporting is my full and intentional presence. Um, and I, that's the opportunity. Cost is worth it. I just, we all have to make those choices.

It has to feel right to you. And my right is not anyone else's right. But the things that we say yes to means saying no to three other things, and we have to be okay paying that cost. 

Speaker 3: Well, it's so hard, but yes, I'm with you. Um. My last question I wanna end with, and it's the question I end with for everyone, and we've touched on it I think quite a bit over the course of the conversation, but just to pull it all together.

And this is so much about the work that we're all doing, who we're becoming through that work, the evolutions [00:46:00] we all go through. The way I like to think of it is that it's all in service of the legacy that we're building toward. And it's not with the heaviness of the legacy that we're leaving behind.

And you know, it's, to me it's more of a. There's a lightness to it. There's an activeness to it. It's that we are owning our days and our lives in a way that is building towards something. This answer might change on the daily, it might change on the annual, but for today, I do like to ask the woman in front of me, what does building a legacy mean to you?

Speaker 4: I think there's an opportunity for all of us to reflect on the life that we have led at every stage in life, whether we're just starting a career, whether we're in the middle of a career, whether in the middle of parenting, um, all of these things. But I just, I, I want to say that I am doing it to the best of my ability.

I feel like that the word that is encapsulated in the alliance's mission statement is one that I just resonate with a lot is collaboration. 

Speaker 3: Mm-hmm. 

Speaker 4: And so the legacy that [00:47:00] I'm leading in the career space is definitely, I hope that it's inviting people in to see the bigger picture. To think a little bit more about what our entire region needs to have a little bit more collaborative mindset when they're going into new meetings or programs or launches.

So I think that the legacy, I would hope that I am leaving in the workspace, at least in the nonprofit space, is that gift of collaboration and seeing the value in it. It is something that a lot of people talk about, but not a lot of people do. 'cause it does. An effort. And so I hope that the conversations I have and the opportunities that we get to walk through as the alliance really lead to people being more curious and more interested and have more affinity towards the idea of collaboration.

But in terms of leaving a legacy just as a person, uh, as I am more on the relational side of things, I just, I want to leave people and things better than how I found them. 

Speaker 3: More hope 

Speaker 4: leave people space to [00:48:00] have their brokenness and space to share what they need to share, but that I do truly believe one of our firm beliefs that the alliance is that hope and healing is possible for every child, no matter how hard their circumstances are.

And we've seen that with our older two children who are adopted. They have hard stories, hard backgrounds, lots of trauma, and yet I know that there's hope and healing continually possible for them in every season of life. And that I get to steward that a little bit. Mm-hmm. I get to hold people. Stories and I get to lift them up and be an encourager.

Speaker 3: That's amazing. I mean, in the short, short time that I've known you, that resonates. I can feel that from you. So thank you for sharing it and speaking it out loud. 'cause I think it's so inspiring for others to hear how other folks are kind of leading in their own lives. So I just once again, so appreciate your time.

I know you are a busy, busy woman, so thank you so much for sitting down and being with me today. 

Speaker 4: Thanks for having me. I've enjoyed this conversation and really enjoy supporting other women leaders. We have some [00:49:00] really special things we get to bring to the world. 

Speaker 3: Absolutely. I'm with you. Thank you again, and I will see you soon.

Speaker 4: Sounds great. 

Speaker 3: Bye. 

Speaker: Thank you so much for listening and spending some of your time with me here. I hope our conversation sparked some new ideas for you. If you enjoyed the episode, please make sure to hit subscribe so you don't miss what's next. And if you are ready for even more tools and stories, head on over to belden strategies.com/newsletter.

I share fresh insights, stories, and tools for women leaders every week. Until next time, keep building, keep evolving, and remember that you are kind of a big deal.