When Disappointment Makes You Afraid to Ask God for Anything🦋🤍

Sometimes disappointment teaches us to stop asking. Not because we don’t love God… but because deep down we’re afraid to hope again. 💔

In this recording, I share the tension between desire and surrender, trusting God’s will while carrying unanswered prayers, and how pain can quietly make us emotionally guarded with God.

Maybe your prayers have become “safe prayers.”
 Maybe your heart has learned self-protection through disappointment.
 Maybe you’ve been afraid to ask because asking requires vulnerability.

But God is not intimidated by your honesty.
 He is not offended by your desires.
 And healing sometimes begins with learning to trust His heart again. ❤️‍🩹

“No good thing will He withhold from them that walk uprightly.” — Psalm 84:11

If this blessed you, share with someone who may be silently struggling between hope and fear. ✨

#BeautifulMe #FaithAndHealing #TrustingGod #HealingJourney #ChristianEncouragement #EmotionalHealing #WaitingOnGod #Purpose #Surrender #GodsWill #Podcast #FaithWalk #IdentityInChrist

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:05

Good morning, good morning, good morning, happy, happy Thursday, and welcome to the Beautiful Me Empowerment Ministry Podcast. Of course, you know this is your girl Monique, and this is the place where faith meets healing, where we learn and we grow together as God takes us on the journey towards healing and wholeness. I hope everyone is doing okay. I know it has been a while, however, God is guiding over here, amen. And sometimes, you know, rest, rest is needed, and it doesn't mean that there's nothing happening, it just simply means that God is doing some of his best and greatest work right there in the background and in the silence. I hope though that you have been tuning in to my YouTube channel because things are happening over there. Hello, it is BeautifulMe Empowerment Ministry by Monique Anderson. Or if you type in at Grace Moandy, you will find my YouTube channel, and very soon, maybe today or tomorrow, I will be posting my first video in a series Algorithms of the Heart. So my book Algorithms of the Heart was uh the release date actually was the 27th of March. But again, you know, God is doing his thing behind the scenes, and delay does not mean denial. And so the episodes that I'm going to be uploading on YouTube, it is introducing the book to the world, and it is also just a journey, right? That I would love for you to embark on with me, amen. Glory to God, hallelujah. So this morning, as I sat here in the presence of the Lord, you know, just talking to my daddy God, bigging up my daddy God, and just really telling him thanks because he is so good. Um, you know, just giving thanks for life, just really giving thanks for all the the benefits, you know, for his grace, his love, his favor, thanking him for the sweet Holy Spirit that is present, is right there with us, even in the moments when we don't know what to pray. The Bible tells us that the Holy Spirit understands the groanings of our heart and intercedes on our behalf. And I'm just here and I'm just giving thanks for Jesus, you know, and the gift of salvation, because through Jesus Christ, you know, we have the victory, and not only that, but it is the opportunity for our sins to be forgiven. You know, Jesus died on the cross to save us from our sins, and you know, I'm just so so grateful to God. I always say that God thought about everything, even before the beginning of time, He knew we needed a Savior, He knew we needed a high priest, because you know that back in the Old Testament, uh, there had to be a priest, and you know, sacrifices had to be offered, and so God was like, All right, this this ain't gonna work no more, and so he gave his son Jesus Christ, who became the ultimate sacrifice, and because of Jesus Christ, the veil was torn, and so we no longer need a high priest to go in the presence of the Lord on our behalf, but we can go to God, and we also have Jesus, who is also our high priest, who also intercedes as well on our behalf, and there's another beautiful thing about Jesus, and it is the fact that he understands us so well because everything that we go through here on this earth, like he's been there and done that and worn the t-shirt, amen. And so, what better high priest we have to petition the throne of heaven but Jesus Christ? So, God thought about everything, he also knew that there were moments when we would not know what to pray and say, and so he sent the Holy Spirit who dwells within us, and so the Holy Spirit understands every single thing, the groanings of our heart, the wordless moans and groans, amen. And he intercedes on our behalf, and the Holy Spirit wears so many hats because he is comforter, he is teacher, he is friend, he is confident. I mean, he is everything, and that is just how amazing God is. He thought about every single thing, even before he formed us inside of our mother's womb, and not only that, but he said in his words that even before you were formed in your mother's womb, I called you and I chose you. My God, he even speaks about uh in in the book of Psalms where he says he knows your innermost being, so God knows the things them, and so this morning as I sat here and I was giving God thanks, you know, I said, Uh, the truth is, and you might very well be able to identify that sometimes we don't know how to ask, and so that's what we're gonna talk about today. But let us pray, Heavenly Father, hallowed be your holy name. Thy kingdom come, thy will be done in earth as it is in heaven. Father, give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil, for thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory for ever and ever. Amen. So I want to look at Psalm 74, verse 11, and it reads, We why do you withdraw? No, I don't believe that that is my psalm. That is my scripture this morning. My apologies. My scripture this morning is Psalm 84, verse 11. Sorry, no good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly, and another one that I want to look at is Romans 8, verse 32. He who did not spare his own son but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with with him also freely give us all things? And Psalm 37 verse 4 says, Delight yourself also in the Lord, and he shall give you the desires of your heart. So this morning, you know, as I sat just giving God thanks, and this is like the Holy Spirit whispered to me, you know, you don't know how to ask, and I was like, Oh my god, I honestly don't think I know how to ask God, and and maybe it is not even that I don't know how to ask, it is more like my heart has learned caution through disappointment, because sometimes, after repeated heartbreak, delay, unanswered prayers, loss, or confusion, sometimes we stop asking boldly because asking creates vulnerability, and so hope becomes scary because to ask means risking disappointment again, risking silence again, risking feeling foolish again, risking wanting something deeply that may not happen the way you imagined, and so instead, what many people do is we begin praying safe prayers, and what I mean by safe prayers, so we begin praying prayers with emotional distance, we begin praying prayers without expectations, we begin praying prayers where they they almost try not to want too much. And last night I was laying down in bed, and I don't know, I was just like, I was like, God, I'm tired, like I'm tired, I am literally tired, tired of everything, and I do mean everything, and that's okay to be tired of everything, so and so, and and you can hold tiredness as well as gratitude at the same time. So, don't get me wrong, but I was like, God, I'm tired. I was just laying there, and I'm and I'm like, I'm tired, and it is not necessary in that moment, it was not like physical tiredness, it's mental, emotional, it's striving, like I'm tired of striving, kind of tired, right? And so you get to this place where it's like I'm so tired of all of the disappointments and the delays and the and and and and and the unmet needs and uh the heartbreaks, and so you start praying safe prayers, and that's where I feel like that is that is why the Holy Spirit, as I was spending time in the Lord's presence, that is why the Holy Spirit just really brought it up to me that the truth is I am praying safe prayers, and it is not because I lack faith, it is really and truly because sometimes disappointment teaches us self-protection, yeah, and we see in scripture, however, that God consistently reveals that he wants relationship or or he invites a relationship that is he he invites us into relationship, right? He invites us into that space of honesty and childlike dependence, and the beautiful thing is God is not intimidated by our caution, he understands the places where disappointment wounded our expectations, right? And one of the things for me this morning, as I wrote to God, I said, God, I I one of the things I feel like for me is I don't want to ask outside of your will, and the Holy Spirit was just saying, you know, that is that is a a beautiful posture of surrender, but sometimes we tend to confuse surrender with emotional suppression because surrender says, Lord, your will above mine, but suppression says, I won't even admit what I desire. God already knows your desires before you speak them. Throughout scripture, people openly brought desires to God. Hannah asked for a child, David asked for deliverance, Solomon asked for wisdom, Hezekiah asked for healing, and Jesus himself prayed, If it be possible, let this cup pass from me. Yet Jesus also added, Nevertheless, not my will but yours be done. And that prayer, it's a healthy prayer because it is honesty plus surrender, it is not silence from fear. And if we look at the psychological perspective of things, disappointment can create what psychologists call a protective detachment. So a person unconsciously lowers expectations to reduce emotional pain. So instead of hoping fully, asking honestly, dreaming freely, they become guarded emotionally and spiritually. And this happened especially after repeated loss, relational pain, delayed promises, and sometimes prayers that seemed unanswered. It's like the heart starts saying, Don't ask for too much, don't get your own hopes up, don't expect anything. But healing often involves relearning trust. It's not demanding outcomes from God, but it's trust in his heart again, and there's an important theological truth that I want to bring to you this morning. God is not offended by desire. All right, God is not offended by desire. This is not the the issue, is not having desires, the issue is whether we can trust him with them, and sometimes we tend to think that holiness means becoming desireless, but God created longing, God created love, he created hope, vision, dreams, companionship, purpose. And the psalm, if we look through the psalms, the psalms are filled with longing. I love David because David is so expressive, he was not afraid to go before God honestly, and and in a posture of surrender. What matters truthfully is bringing desires before God honestly and allowing him to refine them. So this morning, I I said, I said, Holy Spirit, I want you. You know, I always say, Holy Spirit, I'm teachable, and I want you to take me to Holy Ghost school where you can teach me how to ask. Now, where we want the thing right now, and that that that kind of set us up for disappointment because we can't rush the hand of God. So maybe right now, our prayers do not need to sound like God give me this immediately. Maybe what we can simply pray is Lord, this is what my heart desires, but more than anything, I want your will. Help me to trust you enough to be honest with you again, heal the disappointment that made me afraid to ask and teach me how to hope without fear. Yeah, and then in in Psalm 84, verse 11, it says, For the Lord is a son and shield, the Lord will give grace and glory. No good thing will he withhold from them that walk uprightly. And if we notice the scripture, in the scripture, God defines what is ultimately good. Sometimes delay is not denial, and we hear that so often. Sometimes protection does not feel pleasant initially because sometimes when God delayed a thing, he is really and truly protecting us. Remember that God is omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient. He knows all, he sees all everything. He is Alpha Omega, He is author. Sometimes God withholds what would wound us, and sometimes He prepares us slowly for what we prayed for prematurely, but at the end of the day, his heart towards us is not cruelty. So this morning, I want to encourage you. Just as the Holy Spirit is an encouraging me, you do not have to choose between desire and surrender, you can hold both, you can say, Lord, this is what I long for, while still trusting that he knows what is best for you, and that is intimate faith, right? And maybe, maybe the healing God is doing in you right now is not just about answering prayers, but it is more about restoring your ability, our ability to trust his heart while we wait. God bless you. I really pray that you were blessed this morning. Uh, you know, God is just so amazing, and if God is for us, then who can be against us? Just remember that God He will not withhold anything good from us. He won't. So I pray this morning that even as we ask, that we will wait and we will live not from a place of fear or anxiety, but that the Holy Spirit will help us to wait and to ask from a pl and and live from a place of expectancy, amen. Because God is intentional, intentional about us, He loves us, and again, He is for us. I hope that today this podcast episode blessed you. I want to thank you always for tuning in. Thank you for sharing the podcast. I appreciate you, I love you, but God loves you even more. And so, Father, I thank you for every listener this morning. I thank you, God, for their lives, I thank you for their families, their businesses, and I thank you for the deep work that you're doing in each and every one of us in this season. And I pray, even now, Heavenly Father, that you will comfort, you will provide, you will protect, you will strengthen, you will continue to bless and keep each and every person. I pray, Heavenly Father, that you will meet every single one of us, even this moment, at our point of need. Hallelujah. And I tell you, thanks. Every blessing in Jesus' name, Amen. God bless you and have a wonderful day in the Lord. Please remember to go over to my YouTube channel and subscribe, share, leave a comment, show your girls some love, please, and thank you. And also please remember, if you haven't already, to go on Amazon and purchase a copy of my book. I appreciate you. God bless you. I love you.