We're Back: Life Happened

It's been a little while, and we're finally back behind the microphones.

In this catch-up episode, we're sharing where life has taken us over the past few months. Felicia opens up about her latest pancreatic cancer scans, navigating conflicting medical opinions, and learning to live with uncertainty while holding onto hope. She also shares exciting news about a new opportunity as a nurse educator and what it feels like to move from burnout into a season of renewed purpose.

Brittney shares updates on growing Med Max Edu, launching ENPC courses, balancing entrepreneurship with emergency nursing, and a recent health scare that served as a reminder to slow down and prioritize self-care.

This episode is an honest conversation about resilience, faith, healing, career growth, and the importance of community. Whether you're a healthcare professional or simply walking through your own challenging season, we hope this conversation reminds you that you're not alone.

In this episode, we discuss:

•  Felicia's latest pancreatic cancer update 
•  Living with uncertainty after treatment 
•  Career transitions and finding purpose again 
•  Burnout and protecting your peace 
•  Why healthcare professionals struggle with self-care 
•  Faith through difficult seasons 
•  What's next for Hold My Stethoscope 

✨ We'd love to hear from you! Share this episode with a friend and let us know what season you're navigating right now.

Proud Partner: Med Max Edu
Sponsored by Med Max Edu—where nurses grow, learn, and lead.

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:02

This is Hold My Stethoscope. Hey everyone! We are back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Life has been lifing. And you know, we we took a little time away, but it feels so good to finally be sitting here behind our microphones. And if you've been wondering why we haven't had an episode in a while, well, life happens. And we just took a little break. But we're back. We're back. Oh my god. It's just it does feel so good to do this. Like it does. We did film like an impromptu episode when we were to like together at a skills thing, but the footage is kind of a little off. So you may see that episode soon, but we're really excited to finally be back in our like places ready to talk to you.

SPEAKER_00 0:52

So absolutely.

SPEAKER_01 0:55

We're gonna yeah, we're gonna take this episode to kind of just catch back up. I've it's been a couple months, honestly, since we've really done an episode. So we're gonna just catch back up and see what the heck's been going on with the two of us, and then we'll get back to maybe more normally scheduled chaos next week. So Felicia, you've got a lot that's gone on these last couple of months. So tell tell everybody because I think we I don't even know if you'd seen your radiation on or your MSK one yet. So let's just go back to that.

SPEAKER_00 1:29

Last time we all spoke. Last time we all spoke, I hadn't seen what guys. Felicia's been lifing definitely then. Um so just to catch you up, I spoke with my radiation oncologist. I want to say that must have been April sometime. And we just kind of reviewed my CAT scan and wanted to just like see where we would where we needed to go from here. Everything is looking great. I know that the last update, I think I told everybody, was that the one company, the one place that I get my CAT scan done, read it one way. But then MSK read it, that same CAT scan, completely different to me. It first read that it was unmeasurable, that the tumor was unmeasurable, which was woohoo! I was also excited, like my God. But then MSK, they read it and it was measurable for them, you know, and even though there has been shrinkage and there's no metastasis, and that is great phenomenal news. I'm not undermining it. I have to be honest with you, I did feel just a little disappointed knowing that one said it was unmeasurable, and then the other one was able to actually measure it, telling me there is some shrinkage, but it was measurable, which then for me, I felt a little sad because I was like, it's not gone. Not, I think I wanted to believe that it was gone. It's not gone. It's still there. However, it has been like tremendous shrinking, which is great news. There is no metastasis, which is great news. It is still encasing those major vessels that we talked about in the past. Now, that was April that I spoke with the radiation oncologist about this. He was like, This is great news, and we will continue to watch it. I'll see you in November. Well, my oncologist here in Florida, we do CAT scans every three months. So I had done one in March, and then we did one just last week. And those results I just received yesterday, and they were like that pancreatic mass is stable. Everything was stable, those vessels stable. Everything was stable. And to me, I felt like, okay, we're stable. Thank God. But where do we go from here? Like, like, what did what are the next steps? You know, I am trying my hardest to be as patient as possible. As an ER nurse, we all know we don't have the most patients. But I just want to know what next steps there will be. Like, will each CAT scan keep continuing to tell me it's stable? But what's going on with it? And what are we doing? Are we going to do something surgical or are we going to continue to just watch it? And those are the questions that I have. I'm sure many of you are probably wondering the same thing. I am in the same boat with you. I'm hoping to get more answers. I will see my oncologist here in Florida next week and I will be contacting MSK, sharing those CAT scan results and seeing what they feel next steps would be. Because if if anybody that would know, MSK definitely would know. So that's kind of like what's, you know, the update as far as the tumor. I will tell you that I was off of my creon for about two months, but I am back on my creon because that just means that the the prep the pancreas isn't breaking down the fat. The enzyme is just not there. So I do continue to take it. Now I will tell you this the thing with them saying everything is stable, nothing's metastasized. Thank God. Stable could be a safe word if if I'm choosing the right thing to say. It's a safe word because the rat can't really decipher between if it's the actual tumor that they're seeing or is it scar tissue that's around that tumor. And that is where it can really make a difference on things, but they can't decipher it. For, you know, I don't know if it takes a special one. I don't know. Maybe some that have read it a lot, read many CAT scans can probably say, oh, that looks like scar tissue, but that's why stable is one of the words that they'll use because they're not sure if it's scar tissue from all the treatment that I've received or if it's actually the actual tumor. So I'm hoping to get more answers with that. And as I get them, I will definitely share them with you guys. So that is an update on my health history. Lifing in other aspects would be continuing to work on growing in my career as an educator. I am going to be transferring to one of our sister hospitals. And this is going to be an amazing opportunity for me. This will allow me to grow and develop more as an educator, which is something that I really, really want to do. I am grateful for the experience that I have received at the current facility. You know, but I do, I'm very excited to see what's to come for me. So that transition will take place the first part of August. So I'm pretty excited about that. Yay! We're very yes, and now I feel like my cup is refilling. That cup that was empty that made me feel also burnt out, also like dragging and fatigued. And why do I feel this way? Girl, you got so much to be grateful for. And I need you all to know I do, and I am very grateful. Grateful for everything that has been given to me, you know, with my health. God worked overtime for this sister here. I'm telling you, to make things happen. So I am very grateful and I'm grateful for all of you, all the prayer warriors out there that have been there and supported me, which is a lot of people. Thank you all. And um, you know, I promise that I am going to continue to work on healing and just growing and staying in a positive space. That is, that is where I need to be, and that is where I thrive. The negativity or just me feeling really drained or burnt out or empty cup, and it happens to all of us. I don't do well with that. So that has also been a reason for us to just take a little, just a little break, because I always want to bring the positivity. Not that everybody's always gonna have happy, happy entities or whatever, but I do feel much better, and my cup is refilling. So that is Felicia life. How about yourself?

SPEAKER_01 8:25

No, it's so good because I know you've been in just kind of this weird, you know, mental state, which granted, you've got a lot kind of going on with your, you know, health issues. And we had an amazing kind of like reading that was kind of then backtracked a little bit, and that can definitely take a lot out of you. But like you said, it's still all positive stuff, just not exactly the initial thought that we all had. Right, right. And it's definitely gonna be interesting to see what they kind of say in the next couple months about where things go from your next step. Chemo and radiation for well over six months now, right?

SPEAKER_00 9:08

Like November 7th was the last radiation treatment. So we're willing, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:15

Yeah, but I'm very excited. I'm so excited about you moving jobs. You're you know, still gonna be within our healthcare system, still get to work with you in the essentially the same capacity. So I'm just happy that it's gonna be an area of growth for you. And I'm so excited because I do feel like it's gonna give you this new uh wave of energy and revive yourself again.

SPEAKER_00 9:39

Yeah, I already feel it. I'm I'm like, yes, this is this is this is a great opportunity for me.

SPEAKER_01 9:46

I will I will definitely say we uh if I posted on social media, but we like went and got pedickers together earlier before we taped this. And I was like, she just she looks like she's getting her like group back. It's like Stella got her group back, Felicia's getting her group back. I love it.

SPEAKER_00 9:59

That's right. Stella got her groove back. The light is back on. And when others are telling you that, you know. Because you know, it shows like it's very obvious, especially with me. Like and not just me, like Britney, when you're I mean, all of like they're alive.

SPEAKER_01 10:18

We're very safe. We wear our emotions.

SPEAKER_00 10:20

It really just shows. We don't really hide, Will. Yeah, no, no, no, but look at it.

SPEAKER_01 10:25

We wear our emotions on our sleeves, so for sure.

SPEAKER_00 10:28

We we do, we do, and as those ER nurses, the patience isn't our best. You know, like we want things now. You all know that's what it is right now, and you know what? Everything is about timing, and I feel like maybe this is this is my time. So we keep moving forward and keep smiling, and I'ma always keep bringing it to you guys, real and being transparent because of you all is how I get through it. You know, your support, your input, whatever. It really does get me through because you know, to you don't want to feel alone in something. Nobody wants to feel alone in something like this. And I know some people choose not to share, and that is definitely their business. I choose to share because I need you guys support. Just, I mean, I need it. I need, I need to know, or from others to say, girl, you got this. Girl, you're strong, no matter on my weakest days. People are like, you're very strong. And I'm like, um, not no, not always. And they're like, yes. And you know, those words are just so encouraging. And I be, I feel like I have to just fight, not just for me, my family, but for all of us, because I'm like, they're like, she's strong. I'm like, girl, you better show you strong. So I'm just so grateful. I really, really am. God has truly, truly blessed me. And I want to give back to anybody in need. Don't ever hesitate and reach out to me. I am never too busy to answer a question and if I can do something to give back, because so many gave to me and my family and made it happen for me to be able to have treatment in New York. There's not many people that can say that they did that. That is I I I don't even know the words to describe like how grateful I am for all of you because you cared enough about me to do it. To do it. And I and that is you guys are angels. I mean, when I say God sent his angels to me, God sent all his angels to me. Y'all got some work to do, is what he said. Y'all did it. Y'all did it, and I love you and I thank you. And I will never forget forget any of you that, you know, have been there for me, who said prayers for me, who just reached out and said, I just want to say hello, each and every one of you. It just means the world to me. The gratitude is, I mean, these words thank you, just they're not enough. They're not. So but I love you all.

SPEAKER_01 13:07

Yeah, you've you've had such a great support, which I think is, you know, uh really helped you through this. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:14

Each and every one of our different ways.

SPEAKER_01 13:16

Yeah. But yeah, life is uh, like I as she said, life's just kind of gotten away from the two of us a little bit, and we've both been like busy with our own thing. So we're super happy to be back. Uh finally recording again. Some my life updates, I find is not as impactful as Felicia's is, but finally excited to announce that I am officially launching ENPC, which is the emergency nursing pediatric course through my company, Menmax. Uh had to do several days, like went had to go to you know two different areas in the state to get signed off to be a director, doing my teenac instructor stuff, got just a lot of things there, and I've got my CEN review. I've I've I've prepped a schedule so I can get it recorded and out by the fall. So I'm hoping by the in September I can release that. So it's been a lot of trying to do a lot of behind the scenes stuff with MedMAC CDU and growing that. Still, you know, doing my normal PR educator job with Felicia. We've been doing some skills stuff with our team members and got some new hires this week and just all kinds of stuff with that. Trying to keep myself sane because I feel like I go constantly. And I feel like my body this last not like fourth of July. So we're filming this right after 4th of July, not 4th of July weekend, but the weekend before that. I got like really sick, like I had some weird viral illness, and it knocked me out for two days. I was like, ow. And I feel like sometimes that's your body's way of just being like slow that down because like you're clearly not like taking any hins right now. So it literally forced me to like it'll sit you down horizontal for 48 hours. Yeah, and then even then, like I saw her the like the next day, and she's like, You still don't look good. I was like, I still don't feel great, but I'm definitely tired. So I'm finally back to like being normal, and it's just been you know, a lot of stressors in life, just everyday financial stressors and life stressors and just other things. So it was really good and really important for us to take time away. Not that we don't love doing this, but when we look at all of priorities that we have to do, this did fall a little bit. And so we just decided to take the time to not pour from empty cups that we were both experiencing into this because we didn't really have anything to kind of give. So I feel like, you know, I have rested post-ilness. I have I went on my vacation, I've gotten a lot of the stuff I needed to get. So my cup is started to refill back up. Felicia's has started to refill back up so we can come back and be the better versions of us to give whatever we end up giving you guys, whether that's just time in the car talking, letting us talk to you or or whatever. Uh but hopefully this will be that break we needed. We can come back and just start afresh and really hopefully start doing our weekly episodes again, if not, like at least every other week, just to kind of uh keep keep that consistency, right?

SPEAKER_00 16:37

Absolutely. Yeah. So we're out we reset now. We're reset. We do like fast.

SPEAKER_01 16:45

Yeah, you had to reset mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I had to reset mentally, spiritually, emotionally, like, and we're back at a better place. I think we still have some ways to go to feel like absolutely completely but empty anymore. We're not empty. So we have to do it.

SPEAKER_00 17:03

My cup was probably so dry. I mean, I mean, it was beyond empty. It was, yeah, I don't think you, if you were in the desert, you could have you couldn't get a drip out of the cup if you needed to. Like it was, I was done, and it was mentally, like, and physically draining me. Like, I almost felt like I couldn't even get up. Like in the morning, like I was dragging myself out of bed. And that is so not me. And I was like, something's gotta change. I was like, what's going on? And my husband was like, Do you need to see the doctor or is everything okay? But it was, it wasn't something that was health-wise. It was just everything. I think it just took control and I became very overwhelmed. And that's probably, I mean, Brittany, you do a lot. I I often would say to you, I don't know how you're doing it. And I think it was because my cup was so empty. I was looking at you like, how did this girl do it?

SPEAKER_01 17:55

Like, well, I mean, you could tell I really wasn't, and I struggle to find balance because, you know, as somebody who's trying to build something and build kind of a a I don't want to say exit plan, but build my own kind of thing. Like there's a lot of like, there's a lot that goes behind it. And I'm the one-woman show. Like I'm the only one doing all my business stuff, plus doing all the other things that I do. And there's that guilt that comes with this. And I feel like that's been one of the bigger things that probably you and I both struggle with is because like when you rest, you're not productive. And when you're not productive, you feel guilty, right? Like that's just something I think we both struggle with. So, like, even when we were, we knew we were exhausted, us resting was so hard because we weren't being quote unquote productive, and that just it makes you feel so guilty. Like I have felt guilty that we haven't been able to record, but like at the same time, like we've we needed that rest.

SPEAKER_00 18:55

We just like we needed that rest. And you know, something is so interesting. Recently, someone asked me, and maybe even you can answer this question for yourself. I don't know if it was the question, where do you see yourself in five years or just where do you see yourself in the future? I can't remember which which way it was worded. And I remember saying, I'm sorry, but I can't, I can't think that far in advance. Like, yeah, with my health and and with the way that I am now, I have to live day to day. I live day to day. And instead of what where do I see myself in five years? And this was like a work-related thing. I was like, I have to grow and develop in what I'm doing now, like right now. And I just can't see that far. And I don't know where that answer came from, but that's what I said. And the person said to me, I love that answer because people always give answers of, oh, I see myself as a this, or I see myself as a, you know, like higher up things and stuff. And I said, well, just can't see that far because I just take it day to day, you know? Every day is a blessing for me. So what do you think about when somebody asks you that question?

SPEAKER_01 20:08

It's a good one because I have a vision of where I would like to see myself in five years. Like I do have goals and aspirations for where I want my life to be. But right now I feel like I'm in the mud. So I I feel kind of like you, where it's like, I want to be this vision of where I see myself with, you know, my business taking off more than it is and and really having a little bit more, you know, growth and you know, in a house. And like I I have goals and aspirations, but if I'm realistic about it, I don't know because right now I feel like I'm like you in a way where it's just like I'm just trying to get day-to-day right now because I don't have that financial, personal, like whatever freedom to really be able to look past probably the end of this week, you know, like look past a couple days from now, like trying to get there. And so while I have a goal, it's hard to say if that's realistic because right now, you know, we talk about or we're gonna talk about this a little bit more, and we've talked about it before. Like when you're in kind of survival mode, which I feel like you know, then in, right? You have a hard time looking past the immediate because you're in survival mode, like you're just trying to make it through the days, and like if you're like that we've been at, we've just been trying to make it through the days that we can't like look too far ahead, you know.

SPEAKER_00 21:43

That's true, and that's true, yes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:46

So I I hope that both of us, and you know, in the by the end of the year, we'll have more of a not constraint around us, health wise, financial wise, emotional, mental, all of those things. That we can see we're past what's right in front of us. But right now we're in the trenches, and I know other people are too. So we're here, we're with you. We're here. That's true.

SPEAKER_00 22:11

That is so true. We're just we're just all and we're just trying to balance it all, honey. Balance work, balance your relationships, balance, balance family life, balance all the things, businesses, personal health, all the things.

SPEAKER_01 22:23

It is, it's honestly crazy. You know, we've talked a lot about burnout, and you know, because we've kind of been going through it ourselves, but like, how do you find balance? And I don't know if that honestly, I don't know if that question has an answer to it, like a realistic one, because I think a lot of a lot of people struggle to find balance. Like literally, if you look at all the things you're supposed to be doing, you're supposed to be good at, and you look at social media and you look at this, and like people have their houses cleaned and organized, and they're going on trips all the time. And you know, they're not working, and they just bought a new car. Like, you're just like, how? How is it? Exactly. Like trying to figure it out. It's like, how? And like that makes it, I think, also more difficult is that social media does play a huge part in our lives now. Um, and we see all this stuff, and then we feel even more behind. Yeah, sure. Yeah, not like living up to what we see everyone else doing.

SPEAKER_00 23:25

I uh I don't know. I I feel like there's just not enough time in a day.

SPEAKER_01 23:30

Girl, there is not 24 hours, not you're supposed to sleep eight hours, you're supposed to work eight hours, then you're supposed to have eight hours of fun time, but half of that time is due.

SPEAKER_00 23:40

Other things, like, yeah, somebody needs to guide, help, help me. Then I need somebody to, I don't know, set a time, something on me and be like, get up, go, get up, go. Like, I don't know, because that's a great point about how do you balance?

SPEAKER_01 24:00

Because you're supposed to, right? You need to make time to exercise, you need to make time to rest and refill your cup. You need to make sure you're doing, you know, this, that. You have to clean the house, take care of the kids, make sure the dogs walk, you know, check your business stuff, your social media, then make sure you get eight hours of sleep. You take your shit. Like, how is that? How possible?

SPEAKER_00 24:22

Like to get off of work alone, get home and shower. I don't want to talk. I don't want to do anything. I just want to sit there. So then I am wasting hours because I feel like I've been talking, especially if you're onboarding or doing things at work. I don't want to talk. So then that is gonna keep me from doing some of the other things that I should be doing to balance life. So yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. But I don't know how people do it. Maybe some people are just, I don't know. Or does everybody feel like it's a struggle to really balance life? Like, yeah, I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 25:02

If the people that have it together, like, do they really have it together?

SPEAKER_00 25:07

Do they really have it together, or is it a persona? Or is it like, I don't know, or do we just think they have it together, but really they don't have it together? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:15

It could very well be that. So weird. I don't know. It's just, yeah, it's a weird time in life right now. But I don't know. I hope people appreciate the messy that we bring because we're authentic, we are real, we're very messy, messy people. We are human beings that we do not have our stuff together. We just don't.

SPEAKER_00 25:36

So what you get every day working, I'm tired of, you know, I want, you know, can I win the lottery? I want it all, you know, type of thing.

SPEAKER_01 25:48

Well, but even that's funny because like I'm just, you know, like financially, like all this stuff for like, if I just had some more money, but then I'm like, I think I would be bored then, like, I don't even know. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 26:00

Money, money, you know, we all say, gosh, if I had, if I had money, I would be able to, but there are people who have a lot of money, but they're very unhappy. Yeah. Yeah, you can probably go buy any and everything, but what happens after that? Like you buy any and everything that you want or need or whatever, then what, then what do you do? It's something. It's always, I don't know. It's always finding something. That's like always missing something.

SPEAKER_01 26:25

Yeah. That's so true. And I think that's like, you know, kind of the hard part when, you know, we talk about our faith because we're we're all really we are blessed. Both of us have said this many times, but it can be hard when you're also dealing with all the things the devil puts right in your path and just kind of all those pressures that come on you. You don't feel like you're blessed in the moment because you have all of this stress of right, we're supposed to give that to God. But once again, we're humans and we're, you know, all just trying to do the best we can do. And it's like, how do you keep your faith and still experience what life is giving to us without letting the devil win in that situation, you know?

SPEAKER_00 27:11

That's a great question. So, Brittany, since I've been going through everything that I've been going through with pancreatic cancer, I feel like I often get these reality checks. Like I sometimes go into the why me, not even about that, other things that I might be going through. Then I have to take a step back and say, well, why not you? And there's always somebody that's that the struggle is worse. Like the things that we get so upset or bothered by and things. And then I, for some reason, I get some kind of reality check from somebody or something that I see that makes me take a step back and then realize, okay, you need to, you need to take it, take it a, you know, just just kind of like chill a minute because somebody's already always got it worse, and we really, really, truly are blessed. Like, yes, it is a struggle financially. You know, people work multiple jobs, but then do when you think about those people that are struggling but they can't work, what happens? Like, there's a lot of things, or I I I'm truly blessed, but most people with pancreatic cancer aren't up here talking to you. I mean, I've I've taken care of my share of pancreatic cancer patients. And I I I know what I what I've seen, and that in it in itself is the reminder that I often have to think to myself or be told, like, girl, and it's true. And when you're at your you're I I sometimes feel guilty when I feel like, why is this sucking the light? Or why do I feel this way? I'm like, girl, God put in that over time for you. What are you what are you talking about? But I'm still human and I do go through that. But I I I do get many reminders that it could be worse. Really could be. It's a struggle for all of us, but it really could be worse.

SPEAKER_01 29:03

I think perspective helps because you're so right. Like, there's literally times like I look at you and I forget you have anchor and can't. I like I just do. You're just not like that traditional like person. And it's like, oh, like it's been over a year since you've been diagnosed, and you're like freaking killing it. Like you do forget it, and sometimes it's just that need for perspective to come back, right?

SPEAKER_00 29:25

Yeah, and it's true. And and even I, believe it or not, I don't want to use the word that I sometimes forget it. It's not that, but it it sometimes do feel like there ain't nothing going on with you, then then the reality checks something, you know, and then I'd be like, you know, it is, but but because I don't I don't feel bad. I don't feel sick, I don't consider myself sick or any of that. I really just want this out of my body because I'm like, nobody wants yeah, I just don't even want it in my body. It just needs to be gone. You know, it's it's not good. But um I am still truly blessed because most people would not be able to sit here and share the story at all. And I I need those reminders. I just wish that when I'm when my cup was so empty that the drop wouldn't come out. I wish I could have processed that. And I I just wasn't there mentally. I just or physically just wasn't there, you know? And I have a tendency to um put myself in a bubble when when I'm feeling that way. You know, I don't ever want to expose my feelings onto others. Yes, we need to vent and we share, but I almost go in a bubble that I can try to work through and process and then come back out to share without putting others in it, if it makes sense. I don't, I don't want people to.

SPEAKER_01 30:49

To me, it does, because I do the exact same thing.

SPEAKER_00 30:50

So yeah. Okay, right. Like just almost go on a cocoon. Like people are like, I haven't heard from you. And and I'm like, I'm sorry. I'm just kind of in my field. I'm feeling something. And I have a tendency to go be by myself when that happens. Because I don't wanna, I don't ever wanna like reflect that, like put that on to somebody else, and they're like, oh my God. She's like, I don't. I'll share with my friends, with my people, Britt. I'm just, I'm not doing your girl not doing too great. But we ain't gonna harp on it. I'm just gonna, I'm gonna share that and I'm gonna go in my cocoon. When I come out, everybody's gonna know because the light is on again. But that's how it is, and that's just me. There's probably a lot of people that do that. You know, I don't know, but yeah, it's true.

SPEAKER_01 31:36

It's true. It's all about perspective. And, you know, there's there's a time and a place and a season and a reason and all of those things. So we just gotta, you know, as both women of faith, just keep that faith and put things in perspective for ourselves because it's okay. We said like it's okay to wallow for a little bit, but you gotta keep going.

SPEAKER_00 31:58

You gotta come out. Come back out of that cocoon once you're gotta come out the cocoon and you gotta you gotta find happiness some some way. Like you gotta, you know, and we have a tendency to question everything. And I'm big at that. Why, why, why, you know, not always are we gonna know the answer to the question, but I need you all to know that God knows what you don't know. God hears things that you don't hear, and that you have to trust when things are removed from you, when people are removed from you. It is not, it's it's done for a reason. You have to know that. People come in our lives for a reason, a season, you know, a lifetime. You know, there there's this saying, there's the tree, there's the branches, then there's the actual trunk of the tree. Like that's how you gotta look at the people who come in in in your life, the leaves on the tree, like some gonna fall off. And you and you have to be okay with it because just know that God knows things that you don't know. And that is something that I'm learning in this journey. Yeah. So true.

SPEAKER_01 33:05

That's making me a better person. Yeah, I think you know, the more you you understand your faith and and and really lean into it, you do become a better person. So that's another thing. I feel like I've been, you know, we went to church for the first time last weekend in months, you know, we kind of fall off the wagon too. So I feel like that's been another to get back into.

SPEAKER_00 33:28

So I'm I'm right there with you. I was just telling Anthony that this is something that we we have to do. We we definitely have to find a church because we need you can read the word in, and I'm not, you know what? Everybody you can stay home and read the word. That's not at all what what I'm saying at all. But some of us need our soul fed, you know, by the word, you know, hearing it in the house of the Lord, you know. And we do, we fall off because we're just humans, you know. But getting back on, God knows our hearts and he knows us. So never are you faking with God. You can fake with people you're around, but you know, he knows your heart, you know. And I have to just keep remembering that and all the prayers and and stuff and all the praying I was doing and and and in my Bible all last year. I got I gotta get back to that because like I said, the man upstairs worked overtime for your girl right here. Overtime. Somebody didn't get something because he was working overtime for me. And I don't take that for granted. I I realize that, so I know what I need to do.

SPEAKER_01 34:36

Yeah, we'll get back there, Felicia. We're gonna get back to that.

SPEAKER_00 34:39

We're gonna get back there, Brittany. Oh, yeah. We're gonna get back.

SPEAKER_01 34:43

We're just human, so we're like we we we fail and then we ask God to forgive us of our, you know, our miscomings and our failures and just do better.

SPEAKER_00 34:53

So I need to get back and look at the shack. That's my movie that always gets me back on track. It's on Netflix, everybody. You gotta watch the Shaq. It's called The Shack. I mean, it really does have such an amazing message. I'm not kidding. It's it's it's gotta be my favorite movie just because every time I've watched it, I've learned something new. Because we all guilty of judging and everything. And this is why I need people to watch this movie. I really, really do. Because he didn't believe. So anybody out there who is listening, who's seen the movie The Shaq, you can relate to what I'm talking about. Anyone who hasn't, I'm telling you, it is back on Netflix. Please watch.

SPEAKER_01 35:32

All right, I just I Googled it. Me and my boyfriend will watch it maybe tonight. But we'll we're gonna put our those.

SPEAKER_00 35:39

And when you do, Britney, I'm gonna need, we're gonna have to have a discussion.

SPEAKER_01 35:43

Okay, I love it.

SPEAKER_00 35:45

I love it. And I need y'all to state it and watch it. Like, stop it if somebody gotta go to the bathroom.

SPEAKER_01 35:51

Okay, she's like, you have to pay attention. Me and my ADHD, we struggle with that.

SPEAKER_00 35:57

I know. It's you do. So, but I'm gonna need you to pay attention because see, Tony's gonna get it like that. But I want you to just pay attention just because our minds are always like well, but it's so many great messages, and then I want us to have a discussion about it because I love it. You know what? I need to watch it again, and that probably will fill up that cup of minds even fast.

SPEAKER_01 36:20

Okay, so that's our goal. We are going to watch it over the next week, and then when we film and get back in the studio, we're gonna talk about it. So that's also for you guys. Make sure you you watch it between this episode and next episode because we're gonna do some spoiler alerts, okay? If you haven't watched it, spoiler alerts.

SPEAKER_00 36:39

Let's have our discussion, everybody, about it. Like what your thoughts were. What did you get from it? What did you take from it? What, you know, it's interesting. Have you been watching anything else or like reading anything or I have been watching more um net so we weren't really big on the sitcoms and like the actual, you know, we would watch the movies, but we weren't really watching the what is it, the the Netflix original series or whatever. Like the series or whatever. Yeah. And we are getting more into watching the series, and there's some good ones out there. Ooh, what have you been watching? This new one that we're watching, and I probably never would have watched it, and then someone told my husband that his job who watches everything on Netflix. She knows everything there is on Netflix. And she said, You gotta watch. I think it's the polygamist, like a polygamist or whatever. Okay. They're only 30-minute episodes. But when I tell you, I was like, we're like Anthony and I'm like, like, so, so, so tonight he'll be like, we need to get in an episode. Even though we gotta work, we need to get in an episode or two. It is like, it's it's good. We watched Man on Fire, the series. That was good. And I wasn't interested in that because there's a movie that had Denzel Washington, Man on Fire. So I'm like, I don't want to see that. Like, it's not if it's not Denzel, that was good. And right now, so we finished that for the season and we'll just wait. Like, so yeah, we've been like really getting some some good stuff lately. So definitely check check these out because I'm not easy to be like I like, but these have been like really catching my attention. I'm like, this is juicy. Yeah, they're pretty good. Do you have anything on Netflix that you've been watching?

SPEAKER_01 38:30

My boyfriend, he like that's his favorite like way to unwind, is he like loves watching like the movies and TV and just disrespecting me? I struggle because once again I have ADHD. So like I'm like sort of paying attention to the shows, but not really, because I'm also trying to figure something to post on social media, and then I'm also looking at this. So like my brain's always in like 45 different places. So while he watches a lot of shows that I'm present for, I you're not watching them. Um no. Uh trying to think like what we did watch. There was a movie recently that I actually did pay attention to, and I was like, oh, that's pretty good. But of course I don't remember the name of it, so I'll have to come back to you.

SPEAKER_00 39:09

But I need you to pay attention. I'm gonna need you to sit still and pay attention to the chat.

SPEAKER_01 39:13

Like you're gonna have to take some meds and and and actually pay attention. And just sit it down. I will say he likes he he's like into either like sci-fi. He's just he's he has a different taste than I do, and sometimes I'll pick it on, but sometimes I won't. And also it it is very difficult for me to like, I don't know why, to just stake on one kind of topic. So I'm like, I gotta do this, and then I gotta, you know, like my brain's constantly going and I wish I could just disconnect like he does and just make it stop.

SPEAKER_00 39:44

But it's men do that. Men do that. There are things that Anthony will watch that I'm playing my game and I'm not paying attention to.

SPEAKER_01 39:50

Yeah, that's a little bit more.

SPEAKER_00 39:51

You know, like I'm on my tablet or whatever, playing a game. Yeah, whatever.

SPEAKER_01 39:55

I'll play my game. That's how I disconnect because I love this game. I do too. I do.

SPEAKER_00 39:59

And I'm like, this can keep my brain going because Felicia don't need dementia along with anything else. Okay, like I'm getting my sheer, Lord. I'm getting my shear, and I'm getting my share. So I play my game when whenever he's watching stuff that you know, say I'm just really not getting it.

SPEAKER_01 40:15

It's really funny because me and Felicia are so similar. So our birthdays are a week apart, and like we're so similar in so many ways. It's actually crazy. I love it though. It's it's it's awesome because you like meet like somebody who's just like you, and it's so great. And it's like I need people who are opposite of me too. I know we need opposites. Uh me and Felicia are like, we're just like two piece in a pot. I freaking love it. It's like, it's yeah, it's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 40:42

It's awesome. But we do, you're right. We need we need that those people that kind of get on like steer us back, steer us back in.

SPEAKER_01 40:49

It's so funny. So, like, there's two people that technically, me and another person, then do the same job because our department's so widespread and so much. And you know, going back, like I thought things were gonna be different than they were. It was just a whole mess when that whole situation kind of started. It just wasn't what was promised to me about, you know, kind of decision making, which was fine because in the end, it was God, it was God's choice, it was God's decision. God had a and God knew what I needed when I didn't know that. And and it and it's the truth. He brought in my coworker who is the perfect balance for me, and she really keeps the fuck on track. Like, I'm gonna have to wear that little word out. But she keeps me on track, and I would I I like need her. Like, so God, I'm no, you're absolutely right. God sees things like Felicia was saying earlier that you can't see and you don't understand, and you just have to trust that that is being done for a reason.

SPEAKER_00 41:52

So I am it is so I'm trust me, trust me, it's being done for a reason when you don't understand. I mean, I didn't understand something that was occurring for for years, for like a few years. And I think today I understand, you know, and it you know, when you get a lesson out of it, you look at things differently. And I I do think that I understand because I do think it is preparation for next chapters in life. It just is, and you don't see it at the time and when you're going through it, but you gotta trust because, like we always say, God, God moves us and he hears things and he sees things that we don't. So, as hard, hard as it is for us to do so, trying to work on patience. I'm I'm working on it. I know God knows that. That's the other hard part.

SPEAKER_01 42:46

You're like, we both fully trust God. What whatever is in God's plan, it's going to happen. And we both know that, and we both know God is so good to us, but yeah, it can be hard, and patience is a lesson he does teach because it can be hard to sit and wait or not understand something that's happening to you. But patience is one of the biggest lessons that is taught by him is you have to be patient and trust in his timing.

SPEAKER_00 43:12

So and where I wanted a certain situation to move fast, and it just did not for me, but then my health situation moved super duper fast. Yeah, because God knew I didn't. It was like, sit still. I'm like being resistant, sit still. You gotta like I kept like hearing, sit still. I didn't, but I wasn't listening. Sit still. It doesn't matter what you keep doing and try to get out. You're gonna sit still, my child, because I'm telling you, I need you to sit still. And you know what? I didn't have a choice but to listen. I mean, it wasn't a choice in the matter, but in the end, good thing that I listen. Sometimes you can make matters worse for yourself. So I'm working on that. I I am I am I usually do listen, but I am working on my patience, you know. I see where my dear child gets it from, and she's very impatient, but I'm I'm working on my patience because you just gotta be patient and you just gotta trust in God, and everything is about timing. And that's my spiel on that. If you don't get anything else out of this, be patient, trust in God, and know that He is always steps ahead of you when you don't realize it, you think things aren't going your way, it's not time. Yeah, time is everything for sure.

SPEAKER_01 44:33

Timing is everything, but I know I'm so into this podcast that has been scheduled and rescheduled and cut off and all these things. Timing was everything we had to do. Everything at the right time for the right reason. So we're back for the right reason. That's it.

SPEAKER_00 44:50

That's see, this was the time that we needed to come back, express how we've been feeling, share those things, but how we are resetting ourselves because we are working on that and refilling our empty cup. So that is really what this episode is about. You know, it's okay, everybody. It's time for us to reset.

SPEAKER_01 45:14

When life life, you just have to take it, you know. There's uh quote the Bible about, you know, there's a time for everything and a season for everything. And so we just have to kind of, you know, be be patient and wait it out. So thank you for holding with us through our little pause. We appreciate it. We are so excited to be back. And then next week, we already have like our episode planned. We're gonna dive into something that's so relevant that we've been talking about lately is how the ER has changed. We've both been in CR for 10 plus years, I'll just say, you know, in some capacity or another, and how the ER has changed, how healthcare's changed, how nurse changed, how everything's kind of changed first started because it is vastly different. And so we're gonna have kind of an honest conversation about where things were, where they're now and where they're headed. So please, you know, tune in next week for our episode. Yes. And once again, thank you so much for kind of just sticking with us through our breaks. Like Felicia said, we had to fill our cups up a little bit. We were running on empty. So excited to be back though. We're excited to be back.

SPEAKER_00 46:29

Excited, we miss you. Thank you all so much. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and send us, send us any topic that you want would like for us to discuss. Anybody, you know, if you're interested in being on the show, it's something you want to bring to the table. Reach out to us and let us know because we would love to have you.

SPEAKER_01 46:49

We would love to. Literally. We'd love to.

SPEAKER_00 46:52

Thank you guys for another wonderful time and have a good night. Bye.