Build Your Child Before the World Does (Fatherhood, Structure & Discipline) – Neil “Jelani” Nelson

What kind of world are you building around your child?

In this episode of Ain’t No Manual – Season 2: What Men Don’t Say, we sit down with Neil “Jelani” Nelson to talk about structure, discipline, media influence, and the responsibility fathers carry — whether they say it out loud or not.

If men don’t intentionally build the environment around their children, the world will do it for them.

This conversation dives into:

• Why structure matters more than popularity
• The danger of letting culture raise your kids
• Leadership inside the home
• Discipline as protection — not punishment
• Building legacy before society builds identity

This isn’t about being perfect.
It’s about being intentional.

If you’re a father — or becoming one — this episode will challenge you to lead differently.

🎙️ Season 2 Theme: What Men Don’t Say
🔔 New episodes weekly

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:07

So welcome back. We got we got our whole team back. We took a little time off, but as you know it, this is ain't no manual. This is us. I'm Trey. I'm Chris. And we have a great guest today. We an amazing man. All right. We were joking about how young we are. Like, we still feel young. We've talked about that before. We are young. And what do they say? Black don't crack, right? Don't crack, bro. Hey, that's how we are. So look, we have Neil Jelani Nelson here. All right. The man in the flesh. The legend. So what I what I'm very familiar with is Atlanta Black Star, right? But it's so much more to your empire. You have a lot more going on. So I don't want to read too much, but you know, it's a lot here. First of all, you're CEO of DDM Group, right? Is that like the umbrella of all the corporations?

SPEAKER_00 1:03

Yes, that's a big company.

SPEAKER_01 1:06

That's a big thing. The Shadow League, Fanura, and there's many more. So what would you say is your baby? What really got you started? Atlanta Black Star. Atlanta Black Star. How long have you had Atlanta Black Star? 13 years. 13. That's a that's a long time. So did you start around middle school?

SPEAKER_05 1:25

You know, no, man.

SPEAKER_00 1:28

I think that we started out really with the idea of wanting to change the world in a way that we understood, right? And so I'm I'm a student of you know uh history, uh science, I'm an engineer by training, I have an engineering degree, I have a math degree. And so I wanted to understand I started outing to understand how our people are in the current uh context that we're in, our condition.

SPEAKER_01 2:02

Definitely.

SPEAKER_00 2:03

And so I spent a lot of time studying, reading, and came to the conclusion that a fundamental thing is really our consciousness, right? Is that the reason we behave the way we do is because of our consciousness. And this is true for everyone, right? For all people. And so looked into that and realized that ultimately consciousness is really about content.

SPEAKER_05 2:26

Okay, right?

SPEAKER_00 2:27

A person, so we came with a with a with a really um simple motto that conscious content changes consciousness.

SPEAKER_04 2:36

So when so when you say content, does that mean like exposure, what you're exposed to early in life kind of dictates how you think and the way you move?

SPEAKER_00 2:47

Yeah, I think that's a that's a key part of it, but it's it's inclusive of everything that you um absorb as a human being from movies, TV shows, music, your parents, the environment physically, how it signals you, um, how it triggers you, and we're constantly being shaped by these signals from the environment. You know, that how many trees are in your in your environment, you know, how much concrete versus tree, how many books are in your home when you're growing up? All of these things shape our consciousness.

SPEAKER_01 3:20

And most people don't think that deep, right? Like do we think we're all we're consumed by social media, we're consumed by what's just on our basic cable. We don't dig deep and think about the subconscious and what's really playing on the way we act, react. Um, I was watching something not too long ago. Uh it was a, I think it was one of the episodes of Roland Martin, right? And Roland Martin was talking about how we really at it's been forever, but he says the time is now for us to take back control of the media. Do you see a way for us to get to that point? I mean, it sounds like an easy thing to do when you say it, but the people who control media are, I mean, they're hidden facing, but they control so much. But how do we, as people of color in our community, how do we start to can take back that media?

SPEAKER_00 4:09

Yeah, that's a great, that's a great question. You know, something that we've we've thought about a lot, right? Being in that space. And I think that there is no taking back the media as a as a category by itself, right? Because media has to be funded by other industries, right? And so taking back the media would require us taking back control of our community in totality, right? And so, you know, one of my favorite scholars, Dr. Amos Wilson, he he often talks about this idea that Black America is really a nation within a nation. And that if you think about it that way, then the media is just one part of what a nation, uh, a nation's infrastructure, right? Our nation talks to itself. And and so the people who are, if we want to take back and owned the media, black media, rather take back and own a whole uh sl slew of other industries that would go into funding those uh um that particular industry. And you know, it starts with in my mind again, it's with consciousness. It starts with who do we think we are um as a people. If you if you think that you're you're uh you're an American like anybody else who's American, then you don't have a need to control black media or for black folks to control the media, right? Because you're an American and it's it's Americ it's American media, it's CNN and all these other things. But if you see yourself as being a people within a people, and make sure within a nation, there's like some other people may control CNN and Fox News and these other entities in Paramount, and we should control a subset of the entire media apparatus of the country. And so it goes into who you think you are, it goes into identity.

SPEAKER_01 6:00

You're diving into it. I mean, you're not just talking it, you're walking it, right? Yeah, sure. So let's talk about some of the other entities that you have, the Shadow League. What's that about?

SPEAKER_00 6:09

So Shadow League is a sports platform that was founded by Keith Klinkscales. Keith Klinkscales is the um initial first publisher of Ebony, uh Ebony, I'm sorry, um Vibe, Vibe magazine. I'm a vibe. Yeah, so he was the publisher of Vibe, uh, went on to work at ESPN, uh, ran ASPN Entertainment, then ran Revolt when it was launched, and then he launched at the same time he launched um uh Shadow League. And so we acquired that from him about 2021.

SPEAKER_01 6:43

Yeah. Now that's that's right up your alley, right? That's what I know.

SPEAKER_03 6:47

I know. So so what made you kind of and I mean, of course it was good, obviously a good business decision, but what made you kind of want to get into that sports world or you know, kind of tap into that market?

SPEAKER_00 6:58

Yeah. Well, I think a couple things. One is that sports is the one area where black men over-index in media.

SPEAKER_02 7:07

Tell them again.

SPEAKER_00 7:10

And so that's one thing. The second thing is actually uh advertising dollars. Um there's a hierarchy in con within the media industry of what content uh buy media buying agencies prefer to invest in.

SPEAKER_05 7:26

Right.

SPEAKER_00 7:26

And sport is at the pinnacle of that. Yeah, yeah, I'm sure. Right. So those those are the two reasons that that really drove our decision in acquiring that that property.

SPEAKER_03 7:35

Ah man, I mean, that's uh, like I said, that's a the business is yeah, it's probably booming. Like yeah, uh, we talk about it all the time, like with the uh youth, like how it's starting, how they're young, like babies, and then moving them up rankings and you know, NILD, yeah, right, money, and you know, give them Adidas Nike contract. So, I mean, that's kind of like gonna be the way of the world of the sports world. So you can catch them early. Exactly. So you kind of tapping in to uh untap market early, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_01 8:02

Exactly, exactly. Yeah, I think all of us play sports growing up and realize well for me. I realized really early on I wasn't going anywhere on that track. But we gotta get our young kids, our sons, our families to realize there's so much more to the media world than being the actual athlete, so much more to the sports than being an athlete, and so many other ways to be very successful. I mean, I went into business, uh, business school and college because I knew, hey, I looked at the average average athlete. You only got enough few years for the average athlete to play, but I knew if I was on the business side, I could be involved in whatever whatever industry I like for 10, 20, 30 years, maybe the rest of my life, you know. So that was something big for me. You know, they call the NFL not for long.

SPEAKER_04 8:50

You see a lot of these stories on how these NFL players, NBA players, they run out of money fast because they're retiring at 30. Retiring at 30. They didn't know what to do when they got their first check, they don't know what to do when they got their last check. So um, I definitely think financial and empowering is important, especially for, like you say, a black dominated, like uh most sports are dominated by minorities. Um, so you would think that with all that that cash flow, all that that wealth, we have ownership, but we have ownership, right? Yeah, but a lot of times I think we're scared to take on or we think that we can't succeed in that realm, in that circle. But we can.

SPEAKER_03 9:35

So that's why we're glad we got people like you that people like you, exactly. And showing us what I told you earlier when I first met you, man. When I read your Bible, I was like, yo, I got questions for myself outside of you know the podcast. Yeah, because uh, man, reading your your your profile, bro. It just it's amazing to see someone of our color our statute doing things that you're doing, man. And putting it back into the community, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_01 9:58

Right, yes, sir. And then you you were talking about financial literacy, empowerment, Fenura. Yes. I mean, yours go right down the line. Yeah, we're talking about one thing, well, it leads to this. So, what is Fenura?

SPEAKER_00 10:10

Yeah, so Fenora, we launched Fenora the same time we acquired um Heather League at the you know, middle of the pandemic. We we saw a need for us to publish content that would trigger our people to focus their attention on the financial um industry and how best to navigate that terrain, right? One of the things that that we see a lot in our community is that we don't manage our money in in a way to build um value for ourselves and our family. We we manage our money as a way of consuming, right? So it's how much can I consume? And so oftentimes even folks are making hundreds of thousands of dollars as soon as that that that um cash for that income stream gets interrupted, they're a month or two away from bankruptcy, right? And so if you're making that kind of money, you should be able to have a very you know uh large nest stag, should have a uh a significant amount of savings that allow you to operate beyond just the income stream being present, especially if you talk about being an NFL or MBA for several years. Even blue-collar folks don't don't think about this. And so what we wanted to do is make sure that we created a content uh platform that allows our community to constantly be reminded about money, to think in ways about money responsibly. So we approach it differently from traditional uh finance or or money um conversations. We understand that our community over consumes entertainment news. And so we we point, we use Canada to talk about the financial news that we think would trigger our people to think about money. And so we talk about people's assets or celebrities, we talk about what assets they're acquiring, what assets they're selling, we talk about their financial uh ups and downs so that our community can use those events as jump-off points to have conversations about their finances.

SPEAKER_04 12:18

I think that uh, in my opinion, um I think there's a lack of discipline. Because even when growing up, um I think I always had the motto of like, I'm here for a good time, not a long time. All right. So you want to consume as much as you can, have as much fun, but that's not realistic if you want to build. Right. It's not realistic if you want to be able to have something to leave to your family. But if the problem is we learn it too late, now we want to wait until we get, you know, older and or we expect the next generation to make better decisions than us. Right. We gotta lead by example, right? I don't know, it's great conversation and it is you know, uh the people before, like our parents, like they didn't know about that stuff.

SPEAKER_03 13:08

Right. They didn't, so they weren't able to teach us that. Right, right. So, you know, you try to you we learned it now, so we're trying to teach ours, and you know, it just kind of flow from there.

SPEAKER_00 13:17

Exactly. Exactly. And I think we have to also what I what I do with my son, for example, we make sure that he had a portfolio, you know, when he was still in middle school, right? So that he had a so yeah, so we we started investing on a regular basis, kind of put in place an investment strategy that doesn't require him thinking about it, you know, so that by the time he gets to be 22, he he has a whole nest egg that he can retire on, kind of thing. Bro, you're a superhero.

SPEAKER_01 13:48

That's dope. Yeah, so that's what brought us together. You touched on your son. We came together because hey, we felt that there's a void, there's a gap in really having conversations about fatherhood, about how we're raising the next generation, what it really means to be a man. I gotta ask you. So you talk about having a portfolio for your son, but is your son really following your lead, or is he like our some of our kids who want to go the other direction as fast as they can?

SPEAKER_00 14:13

Like, yeah, it's a little both. It's like it's a little both. You know, I think that the way that the you know, everything that we talk about in this conversation, we have to always remember that there is this a bigger social context in which we exist, right? And so for every one instruction that we we we give our child or children, society gives them a thousand, yeah, right? So we can't really compete with that by ourselves. That's why, again, it's so important that Amos Wilson says if you think about yourself as a nation, then you're not just concerned about well, what can I do for my child? It becomes what can we do for our children? And what kind of structures can we build and build for them to operate? Because we could have, you know, my son can grow up next to a son from a different ethnic group or different background, and they can go to the same school, be in the same classes, be neighbors in the same community, but end up with different outcomes uh on average, because that other ethnic group may have a better infrastructure as a group that guides and directs their children into certain outcomes. Whereas our children typically don't have that from the group. So we in this room may do that for our sons and daughters, but but as a people, we don't have the necess the requisite institution and social structures that guide our children into the outcomes that we want to. And that's that to me is the core issue.

SPEAKER_01 15:42

Yeah, see, we we were raised in the village, like we come from and I got a shout out everywhere we go, Southwest Atlanta Swass. That's where we grew up, and we were raised by the whole village. I still remember being in school, and if I got if I acted up, there were certain teachers that would call my parents straight up and be like, hey, can I go do what I gotta do? I had a pincher, I had a paddle teacher, I had all that, but we had a community not only to discipline us, but they really guided us in so many ways. And it I don't want to say shortcomings, but our parents, we can admit it, they had some shortcomings, but we always had somebody else in that village that could upgrade, could raise us up and build us up and talk to some points that our parents may have missed. And I think that we've lost that in a lot of ways, and I take some of that fault because I think my whole plan is to evolve with the world and make sure I'm moving a certain way so my kids are not scared off from the way that I live, or that my kids aren't so rebellious because I'm not up with the time, you know what I mean? So it's it's so many pressures that I see. Um, but I think we need to get back to that real village, man. But I guess we yeah.

SPEAKER_04 16:53

So I got a question. We were talking earlier about expanding out of the country, right? Yeah. So my question would be is it possible to build that community, that that vision that we were just talking about? Is that even some would say that's not even possible here in the United States?

SPEAKER_00 17:13

I I think it's possible everywhere. Okay. And because I think that at the end of the day, the kind of structure that I'm talking about are you or man-made structure, right? And so wherever people are, people can enter into relationship with each other that facilitate the kind of um structures that they need. Uh what I mean by this is that is this. I like to use examples, right? And so, you know, I I have friends who are who are Jewish, and in the Jewish community, we're in school together in New England. I was I I grew up in in western New England, about an hour and a half out of Boston in Western New England, and I had I had all kinds of folks in my in my school, Jewish, Arab, black, Puerto Ricans, Asians, whatever, right? And so one of the things that was particular that I observed was that the Jewish kids had other institutions that educated them outside of the public school that we all went to, right? And so those institutions guided them and and gave them lessons about different aspects of their identity and how to be in the world, how to operate in the world. When I was growing up, we used to go to the MLK Center in Springfield or the Dunbar Center after school or summertime to have you know different activities and events.

SPEAKER_05 18:36

Right.

SPEAKER_00 18:36

I don't know to the degree to which our young people today are being exposed to those things. And so we need more of those things, but we need them not just in social sense of okay, come here and play basketball and do your homework and stuff, but the entire uh don't the entire range of human activities. Right. We need those infrastructures, right? And we can build them because at the end of the day, no matter how the environment otherwise is, right, me and you can determine that we're gonna relate this way to each other, right? And that's and we're never gonna let the environment prevent us from relating that way to each other. And that's that's really the kernel of building social institutions and organizations, is how do we relate to each other such that we can facilitate getting done the things that we think we think are important enough to get done for ourselves to to survive and to thrive in the world.

SPEAKER_01 19:33

I like the optimism. I mean, but we have to figure out how to spread the optimism because we know that we go out here and there's certain guys that are like, I don't care, I don't care about voting, I don't care about what's going on outside of this two-mile race. It's really it's really tricky, and it's really gotta figure out how do we get each other on the same page. It's exhausting. It is that's another part. This is exhausting.

SPEAKER_04 19:57

I've even seen you try to do things in the community with this subpar uh support. Yeah, you know what I mean? And I've seen you get frustrated to the point where you're like, look, I didn't try to do a lot for this community, but right now I just I don't know, you know, which is understandable that that kind of frustration, good that kind of uh support and energy into something. So easier said than done, but I mean I guess if people can't stop, right?

SPEAKER_01 20:25

Then I you can't stop, right? Yeah, I get frustrated, especially a man that don't have unlimited funds. My my checkbook isn't blank like that. Yeah, I got a lot of commitments with all these children, right? Um, but another another thing you touched on as far as your upbringing, um, and if you're comfortable talking about it, you told me you're originally from Jamaica. What part?

SPEAKER_00 20:51

I'm from um Northern Clarendon, so that's like the interior of Jamaica, the center of Jamaica.

SPEAKER_01 20:58

Yeah. So the culture we know is different, but what are some of the major differences you see as far as minorities in America versus minorities in Jamaica? In the Caribbean. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:12

I would say that the biggest difference that I had growing up, and this is not so let me say this before I say any of that stuff. I think that black America is very vast and diverse. Right. And so um I grew up in the Northeast here, and it's completely different in my mind than the South than the South. So when I came down here in '96 to go to college, I was like, oh, yeah, different, it's different. Right? And and I grew up in Western New England. When I go to New York, we used to go to Manhattan a lot. Before Manhattan got cleaned up, it was really like hostile, like a war zone. If you ever if you go if you go to 42nd Street and around that area back then, you know, it was a different environment. So so I'm saying that to say that to give context to my statement that there is not a A one uh particular uh set of descriptions of black America that fits all parts of black America. Right? So so so I'll say that. So my particular experience coming to where I grew up in Western New England, the the probably the biggest thing I saw uh was that um kids in Jamaica uh when I was in 1990 were way more disciplined. Um that's in the south too, but yeah than than in New England, yeah, right? And so um and you you couldn't we don't you can't talk back to to uh adults, yeah. That my the kids in my classroom would would talk back to the teachers that didn't happen in Jamaica where I grew up.

SPEAKER_01 22:48

Yeah that never happened, and if it did, it's you would see that kid again, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 22:53

See right and so that I could say about that particular uh situation. And then the second thing I'd say too is that in a way, and this is more so so I think Jamaica and the South actually are more aligned. So black people in the South are more aligned with my experience because I wrote in rural Jamaica, and so there was a a lot more emphasis on spirituality and religion playing a role in how you behave um than what was happening in New England at the time.

SPEAKER_03 23:22

Yeah, so so the name of the podcast is uh we kind of switched gig a little bit. Sure. Is uh ain't no manual, right?

SPEAKER_00 23:28

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 23:29

So I know we all kind of grew up different, was raised a little different. So with your son, what if you can go back, like what what is something that you wish you would have known back then, you know, or was taught that you could have taught, you know, that you're teaching your son that you didn't get taught, you know what I'm saying? Like what's what's the the difference, you know what I mean?

SPEAKER_00 23:50

That's a good question. The one thing I would say that I did not get taught that um I didn't get taught in a formal way was attention paying attention to to my son in a more um hands-on. I was there or present, yeah, but I've I've come to realize that a child's intelligence is primarily a function of how much attention constructive productive attention was paid to that child between conception and about three years old.

SPEAKER_02 24:30

Right.

SPEAKER_00 24:31

And we did pay attention to him, but we could have done more. Yeah, right. We're both professionals trying to you know uh be entrepreneurs at the same time, and you know, for me, I was in my mid-20s, and so I didn't know that. Now that I'm I'm in my 40s, I'm gonna do this thing all over again.

SPEAKER_03 24:50

Right, right.

SPEAKER_00 24:51

So that's something you would do to next children. It's like we're gonna be we're gonna be focused, right, um, super focused on every single day of of of that child's life for those those critical years.

SPEAKER_03 25:03

That's a I that's a that was like a great one. I wouldn't even expect him to say that because that resonates with, I'm sure to all of us, like you know, we were with us, we were young. Yeah, I had my son, I was still in high school. Oh wow. So I was kind of getting raised as he was getting raised. So a lot of stuff I couldn't teach him because hell I didn't know. You didn't know, right? Yeah. So as I start getting older and start having more, I start like, all right, now I know this, so I gotta make sure that I teach my next son this. So I mean that was a that was a perfect, that was perfect, like that resonated real with me.

SPEAKER_02 25:33

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 25:34

And my dad, like I'm talking about this a lot, you know. My dad was there, but he wasn't very hands-on. Right. So a lot of stuff I had to learn on my own as well. And I, you know, when I learned it, I wanted to pass down to mine. Exactly. So yeah, that's that's that's that's a good one.

SPEAKER_01 25:48

Yeah, we got a lot of cycles we're trying to break, right?

SPEAKER_03 25:51

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:52

Sometimes you don't even realize that you're doing some of the things that you were taught, man. But we gotta break those and be more conscious. Yes. So you got a segment. This is a new one. We're trying something new on you. We got something new.

SPEAKER_03 26:05

A rapid fire.

SPEAKER_01 26:06

Rapid fire.

SPEAKER_04 26:07

Yeah, this is just sometimes you just gotta have a little fun. Okay, yeah, we gotta go. I got some rapid fire questions. Um, don't think too hard about them. Uh the goal is to try to just answer them as fast as you can. Um, if you wanna explain why, yeah, that's fine. So uh question one. Yeah, time out or BTA. No, BTA.

SPEAKER_00 26:30

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Uh man, it's a little bit of both. It's a little bit of both. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, I was raised that way.

SPEAKER_01 26:36

Yeah, yeah. I'm glad I just can admit it. Some people look at me crazy and they be like, yeah, I'm beast like real time.

SPEAKER_04 26:42

Oh, summer or winter. For what? Just summer or winter. I can't explain. You got it, it's rapid fire. Oh man. Different time from different summer, though. Summer.

SPEAKER_00 26:52

Summer, okay.

SPEAKER_04 26:53

Yeah, uh, underexposure or overexposure.

SPEAKER_00 26:57

Hmm, depends.

SPEAKER_04 26:59

In one context, right?

SPEAKER_00 27:01

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 27:01

So with your kids, underexpose them to things or overexpose them to things. It's still depends. So it depends. Well, some deposits overexposing them to it.

SPEAKER_00 27:10

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Some things they they need to know as much as they can, and some things like, you know what, we'll wait. Right.

SPEAKER_04 27:15

I'll I'll I'll switch that a little bit. So, like, some believe that their kids shouldn't see certain things. Yeah. When I grew up, I saw certain things, some I probably shouldn't have seen. Yeah. But do you think a little bit of exposure to even the bad, of course, right? Because it's the real world.

SPEAKER_00 27:31

Yeah, I think it should be gradual. You know, I think I think children should be gradually introducing certain things that can sh that can drastically affect their their personality, their identity, like violence, right, um, sex, right, those kind of things should be very gradual and slow to the point of comprehension. Um, if they can't comprehend it fully, then they shouldn't be exposed to it, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_03 27:53

And you gotta be ready to explain this.

SPEAKER_00 27:55

Exactly. And they have to give us understand it.

SPEAKER_04 27:57

You never are really at it. Nobody to explain, yeah. All right, we almost done. Uh hot or lemon pepper.

SPEAKER_00 28:03

Uh man, hot. I see the same way. Order out or home cooked. Oh man, you know what? Damn, it's a vote again.

SPEAKER_01 28:13

It's a both. Now, if you got a woman at home, you might get in trouble. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Home cooked, bro.

SPEAKER_03 28:20

Car or truck. Oh, truck. Truck, truck. Okay, truck out.

SPEAKER_00 28:24

Yeah. Oh no, Chris Brown or Usher? Neither. Yeah, I'm more boys to man old school. Oh, nice. There we go. Yeah, yeah. That's a good one. That's a good one.

SPEAKER_04 28:34

Yeah, that's a good one. No shade on Pris. We Usher, we're gonna do that. I wanted some home. Yeah, definitely open it at. Uh sporting events or concerts. Concerts. Okay. Pancakes or waffles. Pancakes. Okay. 100%. Beef or chicken.

SPEAKER_00 28:52

Neither.

SPEAKER_01 28:53

Oh vegetarian? Fish. Fish. Okay. Cascadear. Okay. There we go. You the first one to do it? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 29:01

Good job.

SPEAKER_01 29:01

I appreciate it. We got another segment.

SPEAKER_03 29:04

It's OG. So we got a thing called fit check. Okay. Um, not nothing serious. You know, we just kind of say what what we got on, okay. You know, trying to keep keep it cool. Yeah. Like we ain't old guys no more. We still can clean up. Dask and dress too. You know. So we'll start with Ron. Ron, what you rocking? Big chip.

SPEAKER_04 29:22

Um, I got him some ASICs. Um, I'm a grandfather, so I bought my tip based off comfort. It's always comfort. It's always comfort, uh, khakis, cavicon shirt. Uh, if you know, you know, if you don't, read my bio. Uh-huh. There you go. LA hat.

SPEAKER_01 29:37

All right. So this is inspired by my brother, man. Corduroy. Push me out there to get some corduroy. Never wanted before, but I got on the corduroy, and it's damn it. It's comfy, man. It's real comfortable, man. I can't complain. Always what I say, the bamboo white T's. You gotta stay comfortable with those. And my favorites next to the Air Force. I mean, the Jordan ones is the Air Force one. Clean white, icy white. Icy white. Can't go wrong. Can't go wrong. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 30:06

What you doing? What you look for? It's a rap boots. Okay. Okay. Okay. Um, Tom Ford, Tom Ford. Of course. Rolex.

SPEAKER_01 30:13

Oh, yeah. I saw the Rolex. I was I wanted you to say it. I wasn't gonna say I peeped it a couple times. You got a Tom for Cologne too?

SPEAKER_00 30:20

No, it's um I used a different, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a maison. It's a it's a Parisian house, uh um Cologne. Okay, yeah, there we go.

unknown 30:28

Oh yeah, I can't.

SPEAKER_03 30:29

You know me, uh, XL, strange, socket suit, uh Jordan Wands White had the match, you know, me. Real, real smooth, real cool, real.

SPEAKER_01 30:40

So I ain't gonna lie, you came in here clean from your son's game. Like you had on the game.

SPEAKER_03 30:44

I thought this was that was uh so I would dress for my daughter's game from darn. Okay, so then my son had a game. Man, y'all know how my world works.

SPEAKER_01 30:53

You better have some comfortable shows with that going on.

SPEAKER_03 30:55

That's how that's how my world is, man. You know, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 30:58

So there we go.

SPEAKER_03 30:59

There we go. Hey, we appreciate you, man. Like for sure. I mean to the infrastructure. I enjoyed the game, the the things, the things that we're able to uh relate to people watching, and I mean, I this might be one of the best episodes we've had so far.

SPEAKER_01 31:12

It is one of the best episodes. We're gonna do two dad tips. We're gonna do two. We want to get a dad tip from you. What are some advice you're gonna give to dads, father figures? They don't even have to be a father, yeah. Dads out here, those who are mentors and examples to other people out here.

SPEAKER_00 31:30

Yeah, that's a great question. I think that the the after paying attention to your children, I think the next thing, the best thing you could do is actually organize the world around your children. Right? Yeah, the world that we build around our children is the most important world that we can create and sustain. That's the best thing. Fatherhood is a fatherhood is about being a man, right? You can't be a father unless you're a man. And being a man means that you bring order, structure, provisioning for for your children and for your family. And so uh if you want to be effective in the world, don't worry about whether your kids like you or love you or not initially focus on providing a world, the best world that you can provide for them to grow up and thrive and be their best selves.

SPEAKER_01 32:17

I would say you come back. I like the way you said that because most people are gonna think they can't control, they don't have any control, but you do have control everything. So much. I say that again, man. Control the world, not just even for your kids, the control of the world around yourself. Yes, what you let into you, like not just the food, man, what you ingest mentally, man. Everything is deep. All aspects of it. I'm undefeated on the day. He was undefeated, he was killing them with the dad.

SPEAKER_04 32:43

Defeat me today, but I do have a dad. There we go. Because it's the holiday season, it's coming up. Uh, I see a lot of parents scrambling, a lot of dads scrambling, trying to uh put together money to get their kids Christmas and this and that. The real the best gift you can give them is to give the knowledge, to give the support, the untangle things. So start running out there trying to buy them the best toy. No toy ever lasts, but the knowledge can last forever. For sure. So that's my dad's tip. Look at you.

SPEAKER_03 33:15

You never fail, bro.

SPEAKER_01 33:17

We had a powerful one today.

SPEAKER_03 33:18

Shooting together.

SPEAKER_01 33:19

But hey, this is what we do. It's all about us raising awareness for our fathers, for our father figures, for our kids. This is who we do it for. For sure, for sure. So once again, signing off ain't no manual, but you'll see us again.

SPEAKER_03 33:32

There you go. Follow, subscribe, do all of that.

SPEAKER_01 33:36

All that. Come find us, get our number, do all that stuff. Right. But this ain't no manual podcast. Thank you for tuning in. Till next time.