You're So Lucky

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Hey everyone, welcome back. So happy to have you tuning in. Let's get right into the thick of things tonight because I had someone say something to me today that just really got my mind going on full throttle. So let's jump right into it. I was at the barn and um someone whose horses are a little unruly, let's not be honest. Someone said to me, Wow, I can't believe, you know, I won't, I can't believe how good your horses are. I can't believe how good they are. You know, they were comparing them to their own, and they were like, I can't believe how good your horses are. You're so lucky. You're so lucky you have such good horses. And that's what I want to talk about tonight. That comment, and I and a lot let me gather my thoughts. But that comment is a little bit of a trigger for me because it implies that you just got it, implies that I just got great horses dropped in my lap, and I didn't have to work for it or do anything for it, or spend hours and hours and hours of the hours I've spent training them and investing in them. You know, it it makes it sound like none of that is applicable or noteworthy. And that's what I want to chat about tonight because this is a phenomenon that I I have seen not just in the horse world, I've seen it everywhere. It seems to be that people have a tendency when they see someone who's doing well, or when they see someone who has something that they want to have, or when they see someone who has a life that they want to have, a lot of times they will say, Oh wow, you're so lucky, or oh, we should all be so lucky, or oh, I wish I was that lucky. And this is kind of a delicate thing for me to talk about because honestly, I don't want to sound like I it's difficult because I don't want to sound like I am not appreciative of all the blessings in my life. I have had a lot of blessings, I have had a lot of luck, I have had a lot of good fortune. I, you know, I have a lot of things in my life that went well for me, where potentially in other people's lives they did not go so well. And I feel blessed in many, many, many aspects. And I acknowledge that, and and I don't ever want to sound like I'm ungrateful for my blessings and my good fortune. But the flip side of it is I have also put in a lot of work. Like I have put in a lot of work, I have made a lot of decisions to get me to the life that I have now. And when someone looks at your life and they just say, Oh, you're lucky, it kind of discounts all of the good all of the work and all the effort and all the energy that you put into designing your life and making it exactly what it is. I mean, take me for example, I'm a person who very much thinks things through. I mean, I I don't do things without some sort of intention behind them. And everything from what I studied in college, what I did after college, what I did with my career, how I manage my horses, how I train my horses, what I'm doing now with my work, how I'm making an income, everything is not without intention. And all of that stuff required some sort of work, effort, and intention. And again, this is a this is a tough topic for me to talk about because I don't want to discount all the blessings in my life. I've I have a ton of blessings in my life, I'm so thankful. I you know, I tell God all the time how thankful I am for all the blessings that I have and and all the good fortune that I've had. But at the same time, it's not an accident. I I have tried to make decisions and tried to put myself in a place that would lead me to the life that I have now. And the example of the horses, you know, they're they're not good by mistake, they're not good by accident, they're not good by just sheer good luck. They're well behaved because I have spent hours of energy, of effort, of money, of love, of discipline, of tears, of frustration, all the emotions I have poured into those animals. And so when they are well behaved, and then someone looks at me and says, You're so lucky you have horses that are so well behaved, it's a little hard for me to hear because I feel like you're discounting the countless amount of energy and effort I have put into these animals. And yes, I'm I'm lucky that they are great animals. I'm lucky that they are healthy and sound, I'm lucky, you know, lucky that they respond to me. I'm I'm fortunate, I'm blessed in so many ways, but don't discount all the all the energy put into making these animals what they are. And that's I just want to highlight that tonight, not because how do I say this? It's not because it matters to me. Look, if somebody wants to look at me and they just want to think you're lucky, like everything you have in life, you got it because you're lucky, you're just so lucky, you're so lucky, you're so lucky. If they want to look at me and they want to think that, that's fine because I know who I am and I know what my life has been, and I know the things I've done in my life, and I you know, I don't need anyone's validation. So that's not what bothers me. What bothers me, and what I want to talk about on here tonight, is for me, when I hear someone say that, when I hear someone say, Oh, like, look at you, like you have those horses, you're so lucky. Or you know, in a insert anything into the you have those horses, you're so lucky. Insert anything into like when I hear someone say you have that because you're so lucky, it makes me very sad because it implies that that person can't have it, and that's why it bothers me. Again, it doesn't it doesn't bother me what people think about me. You can think whatever you want, like I know my life, I know my heart, I know what I've done, not done, you know, all that stuff. I count my blessings where they need to be counted, you know. I'm good. Me, I'm me and God, we're good, but it bothers me that people out there think they can't have it too. It bothers me when people look at my life or things that I do in my life or things that I have in my life, and they say you have it because you're just so lucky, because it implies that they think that they can't have it too, and that's what makes me sad, and that's what makes me get a little riled up because I just want to shake these people and tell them, hey, you can have it too. You just have to put in the work, the effort, the energy, you have to want it, you have to go after it, but you can have it too. The stuff that I have, it's by design, it's something that I've worked for, something that I've tried for. And yeah, like there might be there, of course, there's there's good fortune and blessings in there. I'm not discounting any of that, but you can have it too. You just have to apply yourself to obtaining it. I have a lot of friends who struggle with some element of mental health, right? Like some element of not being the best versions of themselves when it comes to their mental well-being. And we talk about these things, and you know, I tell them, it's like, this is what you have to do. And they they come back to me and they say, Yeah, but that's really hard. And it's like, yeah, uh, no duh is really hard. Nobody is saying that it's easy. No one is saying any of this is easy. And again, that's where that's where it's very triggering to me when somebody says, You just got lucky, and it's like, no. I put it was a lot of effort and a lot of work, and it wasn't easy, but I did the work and I did the effort, and I came out on the other side, and you can do it too. And this is the falsehood that I think a lot of us have. We think that it's easy, and when someone else makes something look easy from the outside looking in, we assume that it's easy, and I'm here to to challenge all of us. It's not easy, and just because someone does something successfully, just because someone carries a burden well, just because someone makes something look effortless, just because someone achieved something that you thought was impossible, it doesn't mean it was easy. It potentially and probably means that they put a lot of effort and a lot of energy and a lot of sacrifice, a lot of time, a lot of money potentially into getting that thing that they wanted. And so for us from the outside looking in to look at that person and say, wow, they got it all, and like how lucky are they, and like, man, I I wish I was that person, that's not really fair to them, and also not fair to ourselves, because we are selling ourselves short when it comes to what we think we are worthy of and what we think we are capable of accomplishing. The point of this podcast is to be kind of a safe space, you know, to give an uplifting message, to make people feel encouraged, inspired, to help people be mentally well. And that's always going to be the goal of this podcast. But you know, sometimes to achieve those goals, you need a little bit of tough love. Sometimes somebody needs to tell you that you just need to suck it up and you need to deal with it, and you need to go out there and you need to do what you need to do to achieve the life that you need to have. And look, there are people out there that are suffering with real, real issues and real problems. I mean, you have people with real, real medical issues, you know, and real family problems and real financial problems. And and this is not to discount any of those people's struggles because those things are very real and it makes everything hard. Life, you know, unfortunately, life is not fair and the world is not equal. The reality that we all is that we all deal with things that we have had no control over, but still impact our lives in a negative way. And some of us are dealing with much bigger impacts than others. We, you know, we certainly we all have struggles and we all have demons, but those struggles and those demons are far worse for some people than they are for others, and they look different for each of us. And it's just the reality that some people get dealt a worse hand than others. So I never want to diminish those struggles that people deal with, and we all should absolutely count all the blessings that we have, but that doesn't change the reality of what any of us have to do, what is required of any of us to do in order to move our lives in the direction that we want to move it. And what is required is effort. Effort is required to make forward motion, no matter where you are in life, no matter where you're coming from, or no matter where you want to go, if you want to do something or move your life in a direction you want it to go, it requires effort. All any of us can do is play the hand to the best of our ability. And if we look at life any differently, we are doing ourselves a disservice because we will never achieve what we are truly capable of. So if you're looking at someone in your world that you envy or someone in your world that has what you want, don't default to they're just so lucky. Instead, please, I encourage you, look at your world, look at your life and say, okay, how can I change it? How can I make how can I also make the same decisions, sacrifice, how can I also put in the same energy, effort, you know, how can I make my life closer to to that life that I want? Because I promise you, most people have done that. Just because their life is what you want it to be, just because it looks easy to you, just because they have what you want and it looks like they just got lucky and had it land in their lap. A lot of the times, most of the times, that's not the case. Most of the times they made calculated decisions, calculated moves, they spent calculated hours and energy and money and time to get to that place that they want. And you can do the same thing too. So that's my little talk today. Hope everyone's having a great week. And please tune back in. Please share this if you think anybody else would like it. And yeah, that's it. We'll talk again soon. Bye.