Why High Performers Burn Out (Functional Freeze Explained) | Petra Brunnbauer

You’re still showing up. Still producing. Still pushing forward.
 So why do you feel numb, overwhelmed, or disconnected?

In this episode of the Swedish Wealth Institute Podcast, Daniel Wood sits down with Petra Brunnbauer, an expert in nervous system regulation and functional freeze — a hidden state where high performers appear successful on the outside but are shutting down internally.

Most people think they’re just stressed.
 But what if you’re actually stuck in a deeper nervous system pattern that’s limiting your clarity, decision-making, and emotional capacity?

This episode breaks down the science behind chronic stress, why burnout doesn’t always look like collapse, and how to rebuild your internal capacity to lead, think, and perform at a higher level.

What You’ll Learn:

• What “functional freeze” actually is (and how to spot it)
 • Why high performers feel stuck despite doing everything right
 • How chronic stress impacts your brain and decision-making
 • The real reason you feel overwhelmed by small decisions
 • Why pushing harder makes burnout worse
 • How to regulate your nervous system in real time
 • The difference between urgency-based thinking vs grounded thinking
 • Simple micro-practices to rebuild energy and clarity
 • How to reconnect your mind and body for better performance

Timestamps:

00:00 – Why you feel overwhelmed for no reason
 02:30 – What is functional freeze?
 07:10 – The nervous system under chronic stress
 13:40 – Why you feel stuck despite success
 19:20 – The decision-making exercise (stress vs calm)
 28:10 – How stress limits thinking and creativity
 36:00 – Micro-practices to regulate your system
 44:50 – Mind-body disconnect explained
 52:30 – How to rebuild internal capacity
 59:10 – Final takeaways

🎁 Free Resources Mentioned:

Wealth Blueprint (Free Guide)
👉 https://swedishwealthinstitute.com/

Surviving in Silence (Audio Series by Petra Brunnbauer)
👉 https://thejorni.com/surviving-in-silence/

Financial Freedom Summit (Free Ticket)
👉 https://events.swedishwealthinstitute.com/financialfreedomsummit-na 

Guest:

Petra Brunnbauer
 Author | Functional Freeze Specialist | Nervous System Coach

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

I was becoming really disconnected and overwhelmed at the smallest things. I put my headphones on, I got all settled in, I had a little blanket, I was laying down, and I had a panic attack. You all of a sudden tell your nervous system, you have to be quiet now, you can't have any thoughts floating around. That feels unsafe. We've purposely activated the amygdala, increased that threat detection system, shifted purposely towards urgency and risk management, creative problem solving. All of those become very limited when we're very stressed.

SPEAKER_02 0:36

Welcome to the Swedish 12th Institute podcast. I am your host, Daniel Wood. If you are someone who keeps pushing, keeps performing, and keeps showing up for everyone else, but underneath it, you feel overwhelmed, disconnected, or numb, then this episode is for you. Here's the truth. Most people never realize that they are not just stressed, they're stuck in a nervous system pattern that quietly drains their energy, joy, and capacity. What if the reason that you cannot think clearly, feel deeply, or move forward is not laziness, lack of discipline, or lack of ambition at all? Most people try to push harder, stay productive, and override what their body is telling them. And it keeps them trapped in burnout, disconnection, and functional freeze. Today I have the honor of sitting down with Petra Brunbauer, an author, coach, and expert in functional freeze, who helps people understand how chronic stress affects the nervous system and how to rebuild the internal capacity to heal, regulate, and lead from a more grounded place. So in this episode, we break down why high performers can look successful on the outside while feeling completely shut down on the inside. We discover the real reason chronic stress leads to overwhelm, numbness, and disconnection, and what functional freeze actually is. And how to start rebuilding your nervous system capacity so you can make better decisions, feel more like yourself, and lead with more clarity and calm. What Petra says about success, safety, and the mind-body connection might completely change how you think about performance and resilience. So make sure you stay with us to the very end because the final insight is something that almost no one talks about, but can completely shift how you approach stress, healing, and leadership. Let's get into it. So let's start with one of the things you're specialized in is functional freeze. What does that mean?

SPEAKER_01 2:48

Yeah, absolutely. Functional freeze, I see it floating around on the internet now more and more. But actually, in my book, I define it as a very specific thing that Peter Levine mentioned in sort of one little sentence in one of his books. I came across a just literally one sentence. So what I have found in exploring this, and what I found in my own experience and also working with my clients is that functional freeze is a very specific reaction to chronic stress. So that means that when we are exposed to prolonged stress, which I feel like nowadays that's not a very difficult thing to do. We all have a lot of stress, and very often we don't get a pause in between the things that stress us and the stressors that we have in our environment, our work, our home life, really everywhere. And when that chronic stress continues, we kind of come into a mixed nervous system response to that stress. So you can kind of imagine our autonomic nervous system, which has the sympathetic branch and the parasympathetic branch. And those kind of should regulate our stress responses at any given time, revving up when there is real danger, supplying energy for that fight or flight reaction, and the parasympathetic, bringing us back down after, bringing us back into a state where we can actually heal, we can replenish resources. And those two branches are supposed to do this in a way that's, of course, balanced and appropriate to our lives. However, nowadays, with all of the stress we have, I have found that both of these can get stuck in sort of the on position. So you have not just an activation of the one branch of it, but an activation of both. And then you can imagine try driving your car with one foot on the brake and one foot on the gas and see what happens. You're not going to go anywhere. And after some time, you're probably going to burn out the engine. And this is kind of how it works for us humans as well. If we have both of these branches fully activated and we don't get time to rest, we don't get time to reset, we don't have time for those cortisol levels, for example, to come down properly, it is going to do some damage to our bodies. And it's not a way we can function long term. So that's where functional freeze comes in. You are functional because you are activated. You're working, you're doing the things that you need to be doing to stay productive, put a roof over your head, you know, feed your family. On the other hand, you're also in a type of shutdown, a partial shutdown that actually disconnects you from a lot of the things in your life, like emotions, joy, uh, sometimes even relationships, everything becomes too much. You have the sense of overwhelm internally. So that's really in a nutshell what functional freeze is all about. That sort of paradoxical state in the nervous system.

SPEAKER_02 5:48

Right. So you'd prepared a um an exercise for us to do as well. Yeah. I am excited. So how about you walk us through that?

SPEAKER_01 5:57

Yeah, sure. You know, I always think, especially um, for professionals and entrepreneurs, it's kind of hard to imagine well, how is functional freeze or chronic stress even affecting me? We talk about this and it sort of becomes our new baseline. We just accept the fact that we are stressed and we work from that, but we can actually see the difference. And so what I love doing is in a practice and exercise to try and make a decision when we are very stressed, and then make that decision when we're regulated. And you will uh notice right away this only takes a few minutes how different that actually feels. So we can take viewers and listeners through this for just a few minutes, and we'll start with a vision. So you can bring to mind any vision that you're building towards. This can be a relationship goal, a financial goal.

SPEAKER_02 6:49

So a positive vision here.

SPEAKER_01 6:51

Any positive vision that you are connected to, maybe that's connected to your why, something bigger that you've committed to in your work, a project that you're excited about working on. Anything that you want to create, create change in the world, contribute to something that you're excited about. And it's been sort of a a part of your goal.

SPEAKER_02 7:17

I mean my mission. All right.

SPEAKER_01 7:20

Yeah. So bring that to mind. And for those of you who maybe you haven't created, you know, a five, 10-year vision or anything like that, pick some pick a project, pick something that lights you up that you're excited about in your life right now. And through this, connect with your why a little bit. Connect with why that vision is important to you, why you want to do this. Is there a goal of you know, wanting to do good in the world or serve with a certain type of talent that you have where you want to create something global? And why are you investing your time, energy, and leadership into this vision or project? Why is this important to you? So just hold that for a moment, tune into that. And from that vision, bring to mind a real decision that you're currently facing. Something, I want to say, don't pick something life-altering because we only have a few minutes together, but bring up a decision that you are facing that's affecting you, that you've had in your mind for a while. You're chewing on it, you're wondering what direction you're going to go with that. Maybe a partnership, a higher strategic decision, an investment you want to make, next move in a project, something that you're working with. Let that decision become really clear what's being considered some things that might feel unresolved in that decision still, if you haven't made the decision yet. And then just hold your vision and that decision at the same time. Let's tune into those two things. Now we're gonna intentionally put ourselves in a stress state. So keep your vision, keep your decision. And now imagine that this decision has to be made much sooner than you'd prefer. There are people waiting for you, there are expectations attached to your answer, but you have to make this decision now. So what's at stake for you? What's the financial impact of you making that? Is your reputation at stake with this? What's the effect this will have on your team, your credibility, the direction and vision that you're building toward? What about your family and your loved ones if you have to make this decision right now? So think about the risks that are involved. Consider what would happen if something went wrong. What if you made the wrong decision right now because you're under so much pressure, you have to just give an answer? What's the responsibility attached to this? But you are the one that has to choose this. You cannot give this to anybody else. This is on you. So there's a lot of things writing on this. Feel this urgency and the potential consequences of having to do this right now. Stay there for a few moments and see how your body is doing. Are you feeling that stress in your body? Are you experiencing the weight of that decision? Are your palms getting sweaty? Are you breathing shallow?

SPEAKER_02 10:22

I instantly felt my shoulders pull forward, you know, from this upside to like, well, I'm not liking this.

SPEAKER_01 10:30

Yeah, that's a lot of urgency for the body to carry. And a lot of people might even feel slightly nauseous or feel that pit in their stomach, going, Oh my god, I can't decide this right now. I don't have enough information. How can you put this on me? So I'm gonna get this wrong. Yeah. Feel that stress. And I'm gonna ask you three questions while you're feeling really activated in that stress. And you can answer those silently in your mind or write them down, even if you want. So, how urgent does this decision feel to you right now that we've revved you all up and told you you have to make this now? And what solutions and paths forward do you actually currently see when you're so stressed out, but you know you have to decide right now? And what what you need in order to feel ready to decide? So just sit with us just for a moment. Feel that activation, feel that urgency. If your mind feels busy or scattered and you think this is difficult to answer, that is totally fine. That's why we're doing this to experience that. When you've tuned into that, you kind of realize that you are in a stress response right now. We've purposely activated the amygdala in your brain, which is involved with your stress response. We have increased that threat detection system in your nervous system. We have shifted purposely towards urgency and risk management. And so there we are impacting our access to motivation, to focus, to higher thinking, to decision making, long-term planning, creative problem solving, all of those become very limited when we're very stressed. So let's shift that stress state now. Let's get out of that. So we'll move a little bit of activation first. So shake yourselves out. If you're standing, shake your legs, if you're sitting, shake your arms, your upper body. We want to move some of that stress energy that we just created away and out. We don't want to be sitting on this now. So let the hut move through. You can even do the ear massage again and start rubbing. I'm liking the rubbing and pulling your ears a little bit. And just come along however that feels good. You probably feel yourself taking a deeper breath right now that we're kind of getting rid of all of that energy. We're just moving that through the body. And when you're ready and you feel like you've shaken out, you've massaged yourself a little bit, take a big breath in through the nose. You can even put your hands over the chest or heart area if you like. You can keep your eyes open or closed and take some, take an exhale. We'll just do that a couple more times. Breathe in through the nose. And out through the mouth. It does charge some of that energy. And again, if our exhale is a bit longer than our inhale, we're signaling to the nervous system that we are creating safety that it's safe to come into that relaxation state. So your breath is something you have available all the time. It's always with you. So you can use that. Keep breathing. Feel your body deactivating a little bit. You're in a safe space. Imagine breathing into your heart and out of your heart. And as you're breathing here, bring your vision to mind again. The same vision that you had before when we started and connect to that vision now through your heart space, through being in your center, embodied, connected to your body. And think again about your why. Why are you wanting to invest your time and energy and resources into this? Why is this important to you? And connect with all the beautiful feelings that are surrounding your vision. If you have excitement and joy, maybe gratitude if you're working with other people in your space. Feel that you're maybe building a global vision. You have community part of that. Feel that sense of belonging. So whatever comes up for you while you're connecting to that vision. And feel that that you are part of something bigger. That you are absolutely part of that infinite global love that we all share. That space. And if that puts a smile on your face, go ahead. Always does on mine when I think about that. Tune into how your family's a part of this, your loved ones, how you're part of something bigger where you belong to. And now in this space, we're gonna come back to that decision that you brought to mind before. And from just being here feeling that gratitude, that love, that sense of belonging, or that excitement about our vision. Let's think about how origin that decision feels now. And also think about how many solutions and paths forward you see now. Now that you're reconnected with yourself, that you're reconnecting with your community, your resources, your loved ones. Where do you see the possibilities now? And then ask yourself what would you need in order to feel ready to decide now that you're more balanced. And compare decision making in this state to how decision making felt before in the other state, in the stress state. Let's see what changed in your body as you're more centered. My hands are really warm, for example. I don't have that sick feeling in my stomach that I had under urgency. I'm I'm not panting.

SPEAKER_02 16:38

Shoulders are still back, breath is deeper, gas and break, functioning at the same time and never getting a chance to relax and restore. So so how does functional freeze play out in in life? Like for a leader, how how do you see if someone is in that functional freeze situation?

SPEAKER_01 16:58

Yeah. I think what I noticed myself, I'm an entrepreneur as well. I work as a coach. So uh I have a lot of that business stuff around me. So in my own life, I noticed this mainly that I was becoming really disconnected and overwhelmed at the smallest things. So the things that really brought me to where I built my business, where I created that part of success suddenly weren't working anymore. And that put me in a bit of a panic because I I thought to myself, well, you're educated, you're this, you're that. Why can you not move forward? And I realized at some point that all of the tools, the techniques, everything I had learned up to that point and had implemented in my journey as an entrepreneur were not moving me forward anymore. And I noticed that gap, that gap of I had a vision, you know, I had big goals and where I wanted the business to go. But there was a sense of disconnect and overwhelm at the smallest things, ask me what color stickies I wanted to buy or color sharpies. And it was such a momentous decision that I couldn't make it. And that was unusual. And so I think when as leaders, CEOs, and visionaries, and when you realize that there is a disconnect in how you used to operate, yeah, and suddenly you will notice that, and there might be a small sense of panic because you're realizing, wow, okay, everything I did to hear is not working anymore.

SPEAKER_02 18:28

What do you do when you're in that situation? Because I think, you know, there's both, as you say, when you're you're overwhelmed and you're stressed and you're in it, and you just like, I can't make another decision. I'm out of decision juice now. But also in in successful times, as you're scaling, you're coming into a new level of play, which can be terrifying because your skill set brought you here, but it's not what's going to get you through there. And also, of course, the opposite, like a lot of us went through during COVID when the world changed. And so they're like, no matter what you do, you might be going backwards, you might be standing still, you're going forward. In any case, it will be terrifying. What do you do when you notice that I'm getting into that functional freeze?

SPEAKER_01 19:13

Yeah. I think the first part that you already touched on, you're becoming aware. That's the first piece of it that if you're becoming aware that there's a gap or there's a disconnect, or you're not connecting to yourself anymore in the way that you used to, or you're simply not feeling any joy anymore. This is a big thing that happens is we have a huge success that we've been working towards for a long time. We get there and it's like, oh, I don't even feel anything. I'm supposed to feel excited, but I don't even feel anything. Right. Those are all the little bits as you're becoming aware, right? That that is the first thing. And I think from there, the reason that this often happens is because the things are that are happening in our lives are actually outgrowing the capacity that we have in our nervous system. So a big part of moving forward and a big part of extending that awareness is to start working with the nervous system on building more capacity so that you can actually hold that new version of yourself, that vision or the scaling that you want to do, that your mind and body and your emotions and energetic systems, that they're all working in tandem within a capacity to support that and to hold that. That's where I find usually we just outgrow that capacity because a lot of things happen that challenge us and it's kind of run out of resources at some point. So if we can take that step and start working with the nervous system on, again, increasing that capacity, and there's lots of ways to do that.

SPEAKER_02 20:47

In many ways, I see it in because when you say training the nervous system to increase the capacity, I I instantly start thinking as an athlete, right? But I I you know in sports. So what I what I really see, and I've been doing a lot of energy work lately, and you know, we're we're going into the body, and it's I see it in many ways more as it's a part of the recovery process. So we're the this pressure we're putting on ourselves, it's like being in the gym just constantly lifting weights. So hypothetically, you you should be getting stronger. But as any athlete knows, if you are always in the gym working out and you're never resting, you're not getting enough sleep, you're not eating right, you know, your muscles aren't going to get stronger, they're gonna get more injured and and probably gonna start, you know, cannibalizing themselves. Yeah, and so in many ways, it's not about training the nervous system to get stronger, it's not push ups for the nervous system, it's sleep for the nervous system. Actually, finally turn it off and let it recover a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 21:49

Yeah. And for many people that have been in activation for such a long time, because some people are in activation for I want to say years even, it's a really hard thing. To do when I first started meditating, for example, so the first time I was in a group doing a guided meditation on Zoom, right? And so I put my headphones on, I got all settled in, I had a little blanket, I was laying down, and and I had a panic attack. And so it the thing is that when we are activated for so long, this is the default response for our nervous system. And you all of a sudden tell your nervous system, oh, you have to be quiet now, you can't have any thoughts floating around. That feels unsafe. And you it's possible that you get a reaction to that. For me, that was a panic attack.

SPEAKER_02 22:34

And so, how do you handle that? What what do you do? If you're if you're coaching someone and you see this is what they need and you try to get them to relax, and their reaction is not, you know, going down into relaxation, they shoot up. What do you do at that point?

SPEAKER_01 22:50

You have to meet people where they're at, and we can only go at the pace that their nervous system wants to go at. Every person is their own specialist and expert on their own healing journey, right? So their bodies and their minds and their emotions are forging that path to how they want to heal. And so for me, I just support that. I hold that container. We try different things, but really it's the person doing the healing, the person building the capacity that will decide what that pace is going to be and what that looks like for them. For some people, doing a meditation might be extremely relaxing and they want to do this before going to sleep, before going to work. And for other people like me, that's not what my nervous system needed. My nervous system needed safety first. So we have to work on that. It's everyone's journey is really unique, I want to say, even though we have a lot of the same biology across all humans, how we experience that and what our experience with functional freeze is is very unique for every person. So that's why a lot of the times when I say something or I suggest something or I share a new methodology I found, right? It's always with the caveat that, well, this worked for me, but see how this feels for you. Try it. If it works, do it. If it doesn't work, discard it because of that uniqueness that we all have.

SPEAKER_02 24:16

Going through a normal life, right? We learn about increasing our ability to focus. You know, we we practice that in school, or, you know, our physical ability by going to the gym. I cannot remember a single time growing up or in school that someone said, Well, we're gonna work on your nervous system's capacity now. Yep. So it's not something that that we've been taught. So, how do you train the nervous system?

SPEAKER_01 24:43

Yeah. It's a process, I want to say. It's not a magic fix where let's do some breathing and then everything's gonna be great. You know, I wish that's a good idea.

SPEAKER_02 24:53

Push-ups for the nervous system.

SPEAKER_01 24:54

That would make it so much easier. But I think a lot of people find that building capacity in your nervous system also requires re-establishing a sense of internal safety. Very often we get disconnected from that. And it's not always a physical safety, it can be safety and you know, monetary, financial, relational, different ways that we perceive safety in our nervous system could be through relationships. If we had issues with caregivers when we were younger and we have a sense of abandonment, and that you know, all ripples into our adult life. So no matter where we are at as adults, there's usually components where that internal safety somehow got disconnected a little bit. And working on that, there are different kinds of breath work, for example, right? We can connect to our body in that way. Somatic work. There is hypnosis.

SPEAKER_02 25:47

You find that somatic work. What does that mean? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:50

So that is returning to the body, working with movement, working with sensation, working with our own awareness of what's going on in our body, how are we reacting? How are we actually doing? That becomes disconnected often when when I'm in functional freeze and you ask me, Are you tired? I will usually say, I don't know, but I just I gotta keep going because I have way too much to do. Right there, I'm overriding what my body is telling me. I'm probably really exhausted, but I'm not tuning in to make that connection and find out what those sensations are. And very often we have no idea what our hands are feeling like, our elbows, our knees, our feet. That's not something that we think about in daily life, but coming back to that connection of the mind and body is one of the parts that we can actually work with that mind-body connection to increase our capacity and our resilience. So by doing many more things.

SPEAKER_02 26:47

By listening to the body's signals and and actually following that, that actually trains the uh the nervous system to increase capacity.

SPEAKER_01 26:59

It can, yeah. And we do use a lot of other things, of course, with that as well. There are many amazing modalities. We use tapping, EFT, tapping, for example, energy medicine. If you've ever worked with Donna Eden or heard of her work, she has amazing work. And like I said, hypnosis, NLP, these are ways that we can also address subconscious blocks, because um, I I think if if we only work with the conscious mind, we're missing out on 90% of what's actually underneath there, what we can tap into to make changes as well. So a lot of different avenues. If we work with neuroplasticity, our brain can change, it can make new neural pathways, we can rewire our default stress responses in that sense so that we don't default to functional freeze when something happens, but create a different way of coping that's much healthier. So yeah, it's but for me, it's uh it's time that's also involved. Like it's not a quick thing. In many cases, it can be, you know, resolving subconscious blocks with hypnosis was incredibly effective for me. And I I see that in a lot of clients I work with, but there's still that part of the body having that same feeling. And that takes time, as I said, to create that internal safety as well. So many different avenues for different people's needs were all different.

SPEAKER_02 28:26

One of the things I wanted to ask, because as a leader myself, I find myself most of my day I'm holding space for people in different situations, both in in the company, obviously, you know, for the team, for for our partners, but also in my personal life, like with my with my kids, of course, but also with friends. They often come to me when when they have an issue, and you know, I'll hold space for them to allow them to feel. And as that type of a person, there are very few times when I'm not in that totally turned on, responsible for everyone else. So, how would you handle that? Like, how do we how do you find places to turn off when you're always on?

SPEAKER_01 29:15

Yeah, another really great question. And I feel for a lot of us who are really busy and like yourself, there's that question, where do I fit this in and how do I fit this? So where I usually start is with the things that you're already doing, because trying to tell somebody, well, you know, I need you to really change your routine, get up an hour early so that you can fit in all these things that you should be doing, it doesn't work. And it's not something that we stick to because it's just so outside what we habitually do that generally we'll try this for a week or two and then it's if we can't do it, we just go back to our routine. So when you start implementing things with the things that you're already doing, I feel that's where it becomes a lot more effective. So for example, really short micro moments, and the nervous system doesn't need really an hour-long practice to feel a change. The nervous system can work with micro moments. These can be very short to keep signaling to your nervous system that you are in safety and that we can build capacity. For example, when I brush my teeth, I will actually start standing on one leg and then the other leg. And I'm balancing because I am tuning into my body, trying to figure out where is my balance, how am I feeling, how's my body doing? Really simple. When I sit in the car and I have to wait to go somewhere, I'm just driving, I do some breathing exercises. I can do different kinds of breathing, I can do a longer exhale to signal to my body that there's safety, I'm okay, I'm doing all right. So there are these moments in our days where we can add these things. Acupressure, for example, and uh we can talk about this after as well, but if you do acupressure practices, you can do an ear massage that takes maybe two minutes. You can do this in the shower, you can do this in the grocery store, you can do this in a meeting. People might look at you a little bit weird if you're kind of sitting there, but there are so many points in the ear that will help regulate the nervous system. There are sympathetic points, parasympathetic points, and nervous system reset points in here.

SPEAKER_02 31:29

How do you do a proper two-minute ear massage?

SPEAKER_01 31:32

You just start at the top of the early.

SPEAKER_02 31:34

We do have a lot of people watching this on YouTube, but we also have people listening on Spotify or Apple Podcasts. So you'll have to describe what you're doing.

SPEAKER_01 31:41

So just grab your ear by the top part here that's closest facing up to the top of your head. And you can kind of feel that there's a bit of a ridge and there's cartilage there. It's kind of soft. So you just start rubbing it, start rolling it, start giving it a little bit of pressure, maybe make little circles with your thumb, an index finger, work your way down the outside of it, come down to your ear lobe, and then you can come back up when you're done there. And there are, I have my earplugs in, so I can't reach inside, but you can kind of put your thumb into your ear and face it upwards towards the top, and then you can work your way along that inner ridge as well. All along there are different points. So no matter where you go on the ear, you're going to you're going to touch a point. So it's not so important where, but how that feels for you. And also the cartilage in our ears very often can get, I want to say a little bit stiff and and strained. So you can also pull the ear out. This is actually one of the things that I don't even know who told me that, but you can pull your ears out to release tension in the cartilage, exactly. And you know, the first time I did that, I was feeling a little bit silly, and I'm like, what am I even doing? But it felt so good. I was getting all these tangles along my back, and I was like, oh wow, this is amazing. And so now you'll, yeah, you'll see me just kind of sitting there, from rubbing along my ear, rubbing the earlobe, and then pulling a little bit to kind of release all that tension in there. And it feels really good. And there's many parts on the body, like our ears, where we can do that. That's funny.

SPEAKER_02 33:21

My ears just got burning hot as I did that now. So I'm guessing that means they need another once over activating.

SPEAKER_01 33:29

So many access points that we have for these micro changes that we can signal to the nervous system throughout the day. And that it doesn't have to be in a one-hour practice where we sit somewhere in meditation. It can be, if you have the time, fantastic. Do it for your own self-care, right? But if you're really busy and you just have these moments, do it where you can. And the other part, you know, is finding things.

SPEAKER_02 33:54

I like that. I just added that to my daily to-do list now. I'm going to do an ear massage every day. That was awesome.

SPEAKER_01 34:00

You can do the same with your hand, right? You can massage in between your fingers and in between your toes. Like people never massage their toes and they get so stiff and sore. And again, the bottom of the feet has, if you look at traditional Chinese medicine or acupuncture, acupressure, there's a sense that the whole body is represented in the bottom of the foot, that the whole body is represented in the ears, for example. So different ways to access these changes. And that doesn't have to be very long. And find things that fill you up for the activities that you do. So that you will notice as you become more aware that there are certain things during your day that really drain you. There are certain people that you might spend time with that you may find you walk away and you go, I'm glad that's over. I'm really worn out now, right? And as you start noticing those things, start adding some of the pieces in that actually give you energy back. Maybe that is, you know, doing a fun cooking dinner time with your kids because it's just fun and gets really messy, right? Or you like going for a walk because there's a beautiful sunset outside. Maybe you have pets or you take your dog for a walk or something and you come back and think, wow, that was actually really felt really nice. So tuning into the things you notice that fills you back up. And adding just a few more of those throughout the day can be small little things, can be those five-minute microchanges, doesn't have to be anything bang. But you'll find that when you do this throughout the day, you're actually continuously starting to signal to your nervous system that you're building safety and that you are making changes. So over time, that adds up.

SPEAKER_02 35:47

Right. I could almost hear our listeners when you said everyone is the expert on their own healing journey. I could almost hear people go, No, I have no idea. How do you actually get that insight into how do you start trusting what your body is asking you to do?

SPEAKER_01 36:05

Yeah, that's a great question. And again, for me, so related to that mind-body disconnect that we often experience when it comes to chronic stress. So somebody told me once that when we are in chronic stress and our mind-body connection gets disrupted, we become these little bobbleheads. We technically just live in our heads. We make decisions, we think about things, we overthink things, we berate ourselves. We are our own worst inner critic on everything, but it all happens in our head. So you see, there is this disconnect where we are not in our bodies really anymore. We're just functioning from our heads and from a very logical and mental level, a cognitive level. So part of coming back to that inner expert and understanding your intuition and your own inner wisdom, I think is healing that mind-body connection. And as we said before, when we start coming more into our body, when we actually start becoming aware of what our body is even doing down there, we come out of our head and we come back into feeling and sensing and being part of that. Uh, I feel like almost half of our life is cut off because we're just living from here on up. When we come back into our whole selves, it doesn't usually take that much time that you start getting these little twinges of, oh, you know, I have a really sore back. Maybe I should take a break. Or I have a headache, you know, maybe I should hydrate and and just too breathing for a little bit. And that's that's your inner guidance. That's where that expert comes from, right? It's your body is sharing, but very often we just don't listen. And it's just coming back to that, reconnecting those pieces. And eventually you will actually notice. I think that you do get a lot of signals from your body about all sorts of things that uh concern your own well-being. And it's just about tuning into that and listening in.

SPEAKER_02 38:04

What's interesting for me is I'm basically it's the same decision I'm going to make on this one. The difference is in that stress field, I felt like I only had one option. Yeah. Now I see all the options. I'm still making the same decision, but I'm making it because I want to, rather than this is my only option here. I'm choiceless.

SPEAKER_01 38:24

Yeah, exactly. So we move from this reactive state of feeling that things are happening to us and we're constantly in this sense of urgency to a very different embodied state. And usually when I'm in this more embodied and centered state, I also see a lot of different creative options on how we could solve things. You know, I think of, oh, I could call this person, I connect with this person, or maybe this person has an idea. So as you said, I might still make the same decision, but I feel very different about how I now make that decision and the kind of resources that are available to me around the decision making. And so probably viewers and listeners can tell that even just in the short time, maybe the 10 minutes that we've spent on this, you can tell that physiologically, cognitively, emotionally, you're in a very different space when you are stressed. And that's the state that we want to resolve. We we want to bring you more relaxation, bring you into a more embodied, more aligned state so that you're not reacting to the things in your life, but you're coming into a choice, you're coming into joy, you're coming into gratitude. And from that space, you are living your life with access to the higher thinking, to all the areas of your brain that get shut down when stress just takes over. And really have access to all of those resources.

SPEAKER_02 39:50

So the question that's coming up for me is obviously this is awesome. And I love doing the I love being the guinea pig in these podcast episodes.

SPEAKER_01 39:58

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 39:59

The the difficulty, I think, is how do I do it to myself? Right? It's amazing when you're doing it, but I can't call you every time like, hey, Petra, I'm getting stressed now. Come on, walk me through this. So, how do I how do I do this to myself without being reliant on having someone else come and save me?

SPEAKER_01 40:19

Yeah, exactly. And so that's why we want to build capacity in the nervous system. Because that's where you will be when you are building and have built that capacity. You will automatically come into the state of having the choice of being more grounded, being more balanced. So how you do this is exactly through these little bits and pieces that we've been putting together, connecting the dots on do these micro moments in your day, do these micro moments in your work life to start building that capacity. So as you are making these changes in your life, you keep signaling to the nervous system that it's actually safe and that capacity will increase. What that means in practical terms is that when you come to places like we were just demonstrating, your default stress response is going to start changing. And your brain is going to notice that there are more options than just that urgency that you first had available. But when you have more capacity, you're also going to see more of those choices that don't put you in a reactive mode all the time. So that is, I want to say, almost like the result of building that capacity in the nervous system. And for yourselves, if you are in that stress state, start with basic, basic things that are available to you. That is your breath. You can always do a little bit of breath work. That is your body. You can always come back to your body. There are points on the body that I work with, for example, between the index finger and the thumb, there's this kind of squishy part in between there. There's an amazing stress point in there. So if you're massaging or squeezing that, for example, while you're doing a little bit of breathing, I can feel that tingling all the way down my spine. Do things for yourself, even if they're really small throughout the day, because the bigger ripple, the bigger result that you will see with this work over time, is that you will exactly be in that space of choice when you're starting to feel activated and stressed. So yeah, that's the path and a bit of the result.

SPEAKER_02 42:30

I feel so much calmer. Like I could go take a nap now and just the perfect though. It's uh it's as I told you before you got the call. I got some friends coming over and we're doing a spa evening. So now I'm in, I'm getting into my spa mode. So that was perfect. Every episode we always end with a rapid fire round of questions. So we're gonna go back into some speed and put you put you in a stress response now.

SPEAKER_01 42:56

Put me in the urgency.

SPEAKER_02 42:58

Yeah, pay it, pay, you know, turnarounds fair game. So now it's our turn. Yeah. So I'm gonna ask you five questions and you just answer, you know, what what is uh what is the first thing that comes to mind? All right, you ready?

SPEAKER_01 43:12

I'm ready.

SPEAKER_02 43:13

All right, yeah, I see. You're centered, you're ready.

SPEAKER_01 43:16

Coming into alignment.

SPEAKER_02 43:18

Exactly. All right. What is one sign of functional freeze?

SPEAKER_01 43:24

Functioning on the outside and being completely disconnected on the inside.

SPEAKER_02 43:30

What is one habit that keeps people stuck?

SPEAKER_01 43:33

I think ignoring our bodies to stay productive. That is the biggest thing.

SPEAKER_02 43:39

Keep pushing, pushing, pushing.

SPEAKER_01 43:41

Pushing, yeah. Do it. Keep doing it, no matter what the cost is.

SPEAKER_02 43:46

What's one false idea about resilience?

SPEAKER_01 43:50

Oh, that connects to what we just said. Resilience does not equal pushing through. Those are not the same thing.

SPEAKER_02 43:56

Very true. All right, what is one regulation practice? That actually makes an impact.

SPEAKER_01 44:03

Working on healing that mind-body connection that we talked about. So do this through using your breath. Because the breath also activates the vagus nerve. You can work on heart rate variability with the breath. So the breath has amazing ripple effects. So work on healing that mind-body connection. Breath with movement, with mindfulness, awareness. Those are amazing pieces that you can layer into healing that mind-body connection.

SPEAKER_02 44:31

What is one word that defines embodied leadership?

SPEAKER_01 44:36

I want to say embodied, but regulated. When we are regulated, that is when we can become embodied. And I think a lot of people think that regulated means that we never have stress or we never have stressful moments. It's not that at all. It just means that we can actually stay centered and balanced longer through different challenges, through different triggers, and we can return to that center quicker as well after things come and challenge us and cause us stress. So I would say that that regulation allows us to become those embodied leaders.

SPEAKER_02 45:15

So as you know, we uh love taking care of our clients, and you've prepared you have so many resources that can support people on this. Do you have anything that you know our listeners here can keep uh connecting with you and keep learning and keep growing?

SPEAKER_01 45:32

Yeah, absolutely. And we actually created something that's not available on our website, so you it's only available when you listen to an amazing podcast like yours. So we created it just for this reason. And so when I wrote the book, I I wrote it with the sense that I wanted it to be a roadmap for people to really do the steps that we discussed in this podcast, become aware of the code.

SPEAKER_02 45:54

And we'll link to the book as well in the show notes guide so you can find Petra's book.

SPEAKER_01 45:59

And then take those steps to to come to the exercises so that you can come out of functional freeze. But a lot of people don't have time to read the book, and so we created a shortened audio journey that takes you through all the chapters of the book, but I narrate it and it's condensed, so you don't have to spend time reading the book, although you might want to, but we are sharing that audio experience as an eight-part series, and it's free for anyone who wants to experience it. It's called the surviving in silence series, because very often that's exactly what we do when we're in functional freeze. We survive in silence, have that smile on the outside that we're functioning, and on the inside things are looking so differently. So if this has resonated with you today, if if you're feeling some of the pieces that we talked about, you're thinking, wow, this is me or this hasn't been me, go and check out the audio series and get some more information on that and and some more insight on how to work with that.

SPEAKER_02 47:01

Oh, amazing. Thank you so much. We'll sh link to that in the show notes. Petra, say thank you so much for joining us. Do you have any final words of wisdom you want us to take with us leaving this show?

SPEAKER_01 47:12

Really work at your own pace. That is the biggest piece. And don't look at your own healing journey as something that has to look a certain way or has to happen by a certain time or in a certain way. Really come back to, as I said, your own inner guidance. Follow that and build that trust with it. Because you will know what that journey needs to look like for you from that. And that was one of the biggest pieces in my healing journey. People telling me, Oh, you have to do this, you have to be up at four, you have to have a two-hour morning routine, and just that time alone to stop me from doing anything, because it was so overwhelming. So do what works for you and make that healing journey yours, and um and it'll work. And we've seen it work, I've experienced it working, so it will work.

SPEAKER_02 48:03

Petra, thank you so much for joining us today. I really appreciate you taking the time to spend here with us.

SPEAKER_01 48:08

Absolutely. Thank you for this opportunity to share more about functional freeze and spend some time with you. It's been so much fun and so much gratitude for this invitation. Thank you.

SPEAKER_02 48:19

Right by Katcha. And guys, if you like these things, go check out the links there in the show notes. Petra, thank you so much. I appreciate you.

SPEAKER_01 48:27

Thanks, Daniel. Take care.

SPEAKER_02 48:34

Thank you so much for joining us for this interview with Petra. It's time for my favorite part of the show, which is where me and the Swedish Wealth Institute team break down the episode into clear, actionable insights that you can use in your life. Because here at the Swedish Wealth Institute, we're always looking for the answer to what is the difference that makes the difference. So here are four takeaways you can take from this episode. Number one, pushing through is not the same as resilience. So one of the biggest traps for high performers is thinking that more pressure, more force, more output will solve everything. But as Petra shared, when stress becomes chronic, pushing harder can actually deepen the disconnect between your mind and your body and keep you stuck in functional freeze. 2. You can look successful on the outside while shutting down on the inside. Functional freeze is such a dangerous state because you can still be working, leading, producing, and showing up for everyone else while internally you feel numb, overwhelmed, disconnected, and exhausted. Just because you are functioning doesn't mean you are truly okay. Number three, better decisions come from regulation, not urgency. One of the most powerful parts for me in this episode was seeing how differently we think under stress versus when we're in a calm, centered, regulated state. When you are activated, everything feels narrow, urgent, heavy. When you are grounded, you see more options, more creativity, and more choice. Even if the final decision ends up being the same. Number four, nervous system healing does not start with massive routine. It starts with micro moments. This episode was a great reminder for me about how healing and regulation do not have to begin with some, you know, perfect two-hour morning routine or a three-hour meditation. It can begin with one simple breath, one pause, the ear massage technique, just a moment of awareness, or simply listening when your body is asking for rest. These small signals for safely safety, repeated consistently, can create profound change over time. So I hope you take these lessons and implement them into your life. And of course, before you go, we've put together something special for you. I want to give you a ticket to our Financial Freedom Summit, which is designed to help you grow your wealth, sharpen your strategy, and learn directly from the biggest names in personal development, entrepreneurship, and investing in the world. We have one summit that is in the North American time zone and another one that aims for Europe and Africa. Both summits feature, among others, Robert Kiyosaki, Les Brown, Nick Voyacich, Marcy Shimoff, Brian Tracy, Janet Atwood, Jack Camfield, and many more. It's an incredible opportunity, and you can claim your tickets right now by going to the show notes. Now, if you got value from this episode, I hope you want to share it with someone else who you think might need this. Of course, I hope you've done like thousands of other people all over the world and followed and subscribed so you don't miss what's coming next. And I'll tell you what that is in a moment. And of course, if you want to support the podcast, we'd love it if you would give us a five-star review on whatever platform you're following this on, because it has a huge impact on how we can reach new amazing people and introduce them to this amazing community as well. Next week, we have an incredible episode with Aldwin Altoon, where we dive into PR and powerful strategies that we now use in the Swedish Wealth Institute and why getting seen in the right way can change the trajectory of your business. I'm Daniel Wood, this is the Swedish Wealth Institute podcast. Thank you for joining us.

SPEAKER_00 52:39

I've had depression myself. I've had four friends take their own lives by the age of 45, and I truly believe the media that we put out there has a lot to do with that. And did you know that a third of people die by 65 and 90% of people die with So at the heart of what we do is we help to encourage people, inspire people to listen out for the things that upset you and anger you because I believe they're particularly now when only 2% of your followers are seeing your content and it is about building engagement. I had about 1,500 followers at one point, and I remember my whole account got shut down for no reason. And I got so frustrated with