Base Buddies
Welcome to the Base Buddies Podcast — a cozy space for military spouses to connect, share stories, and swap advice. Whether you’re looking for laughs, guidance, or just a reminder that you’re not alone on this journey, we’ve got a seat at the table for you.
Base Buddies
Base Buddies LIVE at Black Rifle Coffee | Keep Moving Forward
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Our very first Base Buddies LIVE is here! 🎙️
Join us as we take the podcast on the road for a special live event hosted by Black Rifle Coffee in San Antonio. We dive into honest conversations about resilience, navigating military life, finding purpose through difficult seasons, and what it truly means to Keep Moving Forward.
We also officially announced the launch of our brand-new Keep Moving Forward collection, featuring our first-ever hoodies, t-shirts, and tote bags, created to inspire and remind our community that every step forward matters.
Whether you joined us in person or you're listening from across the world, thank you for being part of the Base Buddies family. Your support is helping us build a community where military spouses and loved ones can connect, grow, and never feel alone.
💚 Coming Soon! Shop the Keep Moving Forward Collection
🛍️ Hoodies • T-Shirts • Tote Bags
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Thank you for listening, and as always… keep moving forward.
Alrighty, so today's topic is going to be keep moving forward and what does that essentially mean to us? Michaela, what does that what does that mean to you?
SPEAKER_00Oh, that's a good one. I think for me is knowing that every situation isn't permanent. So just thinking there's an after the current situation for me, moving from London, you know, that was a big culture shock as a military spouse, moving to the US. It was a struggle, you know, leaving my career. But I know it's not forever. And also I'm big on like moving to a new country, exploring different cities, meeting new people. And that's what keeps it exciting for me. And that's why keep moving forward. That's what it means to me.
SPEAKER_01That's amazing. For for me in particular, the reason why I chose the theme for today to be keep moving forward is because when I was little, I never really thought of myself as like extraordinary or anything along those lines. My circumstances growing up weren't necessarily the best, just like most Americans and just most like most people in general. And so I never really thought that like being extraordinary was something that I could achieve. Right. I thought that being extraordinary meant to be like a millionaire or to have like the capability to essentially be more than what you were raised to be because you have the means. Until I saw Meet the Robinsons. Yeah, I know. Meet the Robinsons. The Pixar movie, I think it's a Pixar movie. And so when I first saw that movie, I was like about eight years old. And the theme of that movie, if you're not really familiar with it, is about Lewis. He's a kid, he grew up in an orphanage, and he's really smart, though all of his inventions are crap. Like all of his inventions fail. But the theme of that movie was, and he goes to the future and all that stuff. I'm sure that you all are familiar with it. He goes to the future, meets his family, and even though his inventions keep failing, his family celebrates his failures and encourage him to keep moving forward because that's basically what they're celebrating. Failures aren't necessarily a setback, they're a learning lesson to keep moving forward, keep going, right? And so that's what it means to me. Keep moving forward means resiliency. Keep moving forward means to stay strong regardless of circumstances that you were dealt with, to be strong and capable of thinking outside of the box whenever your situation right now seems to not really motivate you to keep going, right? To just think outside the box and think of those around you and think of your future and what you're capable of. So that that to me, that's what keep moving forward means. And I feel like it ties really well into the military spouse realm because all of us just keep going regardless, you know. We are put in a situation, unfortunately, well, fortunately and unfortunately, that makes us move every two to three years, makes us change careers every two to three years, makes us rebuild our community every two to three years. So on paper it seems awesome, but of course you can't take the human aspect of it. It's very, it's very uh tiresome and isolating and isolating. And so that brings us to our next topic, which is basically uh PCSing. That's a big one. Yeah, and the mental toll that it takes on a lot of people. You know, it is scientifically proven, and there's a study out there, and it's scientifically proven that giving birth and moving are literally the most stressful thing that a human could ever go through. Literally, changing environments, moving, and they're like on the same level of giving birth when it comes to like the stressfulness.
SPEAKER_00And also with the military, sometimes you're told like one, two months that you're moving and you're like, I need to sell my house, I need to find childcare, like I need to leave my job. There's just so many aspects that go into it, and I think a lot of people that don't know the military spouse life, it seems great. You know, we get free healthcare, that is such a blessing, but it is also very challenging.
SPEAKER_01No, it it 100% is. So, what what essentially what is the most challenging thing for you when it comes to like dealing with PCS season and also how to like how'd you cope with it?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, great questions. For me, I'm like a planner, so I like to, you know, have something step by step, like moving to a new place. I I need to know where I'm gonna live. That's not always the case. So for me, I think it's more so being open to let go and let things happen naturally and not stress about it because it's out of my control. As a military spouse, you know, if you're told to move somewhere, be it overseas or stateside, you can't always plan for it. Like you just have to take it as it comes. And especially if you have children, moving with children is super stressful. At the end of the day, something that helps me is knowing that essentially you're a family and you're stay staying together, which is the most important. But yeah, that that kind of like being open, being super open. And it took me a couple years to get there.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, no, a hundred percent. I feel like one of the biggest challenges for me when it comes to PCSing is finding, I guess, finding a job 1000%. A thousand percent. Finding a job one thousand percent. A lot of military spouses out there have master's degrees, they have they have higher education and then they end up working either at the at the next or at the exchange or anywhere to essentially get by, because not a lot of us, you know, have the means to be a stay-at-home and everything along those lines. So we have to work most of the time. And so I think for me, finding a job, because I remember when we moved to Whidby Island, it's literally like a mom and pop town island. I had worked in leasing for over five years at that point, and I was pretty stable in my career. And then we moved to Woodby Island, and Whidby Island literally has one of everything, and everybody's trying to get a job. Plus, it's military island because there's only one big base there, and all of the military spouses are trying to get jobs. And so finding a job for me was such a struggle. I literally was jobless for about five months, and then I got a job at the next, and then after that, I got a job at base housing, which was a blessing because they're never hiring. And so it took me like over maybe like six months to a year to like find an actual job that I enjoyed. And so that was probably the the biggest challenge for me.
SPEAKER_00That's a great thing that you bring up for me being one of those people that did go to college, had years of experience in the fashion industry specifically. Moving to the States, I had to let go of my very good job. How was that? God, I'd say it took me a while to get over it. It was a really hard thing to do, and I don't regret it because at the end of the day I was with my spouse. Yeah, that's where I wanted to be, but it was also a big pride thing looking for a job. I didn't understand coming from the UK to the US, how challenging it was gonna be. I was very naive coming into it. I thought, hey, I have an education, have all this experience. Um it's gonna be easy finding a job. And not at all. I moved to Shreveport, Louisiana, again, very small town, no fashion jobs there whatsoever. It's like a military city, medical city, nothing that I have experience in. And once I did get my green card and I was, you know, permitted to work in the United States, it was so challenging finding a job. And I felt like for military spouses, like as soon as people ask the question, what brings you to the states or what brings you here? And you mention, hey, I married a military man and here I am, they put you in this box where they think, oh, they're gonna leave in a couple of years, you know. And I feel like sometimes, you know, that's really challenging because people think, oh, they're gonna leave, they're not taking you seriously, but you're really wanting to work hard and find out. 100% for me specifically, I had to take many steps down when I started a very junior role in sales back in Louisiana, and that for me was very hard because I went from a super senior position to something very junior, and I think the pride in me as well, you know, thinking I worked all these years, like 10 plus years, working my butt off, and now I'm doing something super junior, it just really hit me bad. But at the end of the day, with that, although it was challenging, I think it brought so many things from it, and it humbled me a little bit. Yeah, and also, yeah, it just brought to light that that's not everything in life. But I agree with you in terms of that being one of the biggest challenges for sure.
SPEAKER_01So I want to touch on whenever you did your your career in London, and then you realized that you were coming over here, and then it was Street Poor, Louisiana, and you literally had no opportunities there. What was what was one moment that you were thinking you almost like gave up?
SPEAKER_00I just felt like a failure. Like I was applying to job after job after job, and I was like either getting no opportunity whatsoever to interview, or people would come back to me and be like, you're too qualified. Do you know how frustrating that is?
SPEAKER_01Too qualified for a job is crazy.
SPEAKER_00I mean, it made me start my own small business. I guess that's a positive that came out of it. But yeah, it was very, very what's the the correct term in terms of it made me want to give up, like altogether, like stop working and just stay at home. But I know that in me, I'm not a stay-at-home person. I like to work, I like to keep busy, and yeah, that that kept me moving forward to like find something. And I eventually did find something, even though it's not what exactly I wanted to do. And that goes back to what keeps me moving forward is knowing a situation isn't permanent. This is only temporary.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, no, I literally agree with that because whenever we moved to Whidby Island, I was literally, like I said, jobless for about five or six months. And I was to the point where I was even thinking about going back home just to make some income and then come back. But the fact that I found that job at the next really kept me moving forward in that in that mindset of like, okay, I'm literally isolated from my family. At least I have this, you know. And of course I had my husband, which obviously it's a given, you know.
SPEAKER_00Absolutely, always so supportive. And I think with that, it brings together community in terms of other military spouses going through the same thing and supporting one another. Yes, that really helped me as well.
SPEAKER_01Oh, yes, community is very important. So I feel like once you get to a new duty station after APCS, it's so hard finding friends in your community in general. Because, like I said, you guys, we move like two to five, two to three years, like every two to three years. And so finding your friends and finding your community while also mourning the life that you had and also mourning the friendships that you had, mourning everything that you had back in, you know, back in your previous duty station or in some instances home, is crazy to me, at least.
SPEAKER_00And also, I don't know about you, but I feel like as soon as I settle somewhere and make really good friends, the military is like, hey, let's leave.
SPEAKER_01You're like, shoot, I just made friends. I literally just found no, that happened to me when I was in Woodby because I literally, like the first two years, I didn't have anyone. And then the last year, that's when I found like my friends. It's always that lost year, you're loving life, and then you're like, no, dude, we're about to stop we're about to leave right now. Stop. I'm gonna be laboring. We're about to leave right now, and I have all my friends. Bro, no, but seriously, that's so important to like find your community, find your friends. And how do you think military spouses can essentially find their community, their friends, people?
SPEAKER_00Be completely transparent for me. I've used Facebook groups to like ask questions, and from me asking questions, especially I'm very naive being British. I don't know certain things in the States, and I I would always ask really dumb questions, and people were so nice, and they would reach out to me and be like, hey, let's meet for a coffee. Yeah. Also, like obviously your spouse's colleagues get together and you meet their spouses, and that's how you make friends. I guess it's just being open to putting yourself out there to meet new people.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, absolutely. I feel like even even though like your spouse might be in the military and you might be meeting like people through them, it's also important to find people that are essentially your vibe. So that would either like find them through work or through other friends that you might have met, or like you said, Facebook groups, or even like open, do a TikTok and like I've made friends on TikTok. Exactly, like social media, like find a sign up to like TikTok, Instagram, like literally make a post that says, Hey, I'm a new military spouse in so-and-so area. Who wants to meet up? Of course, you have to vet them before you meet up. There's some crazies out there, I'm not gonna lie, be careful. Asking for help is also very important. Asking for help is very important as well, as like a as a military spouse. And accepting help. And accepting help is very important as a military spouse. So, with that being said, if your spouse is deployed, or if your spouse is like on the long TDY, or if your spouse is, you know, not necessarily there as often, it's really don't be afraid to ask for help. I need you to be here. Let's go out for lunch, brunch, whatever the case may be. And yeah, and I'm sure that they'll reciprocate.
SPEAKER_00100%. Just put yourself out there, it's about being open and accepting help as well. Because I know for a lot of people it's really hard to accept help. I used to be like that. Now I'm more accepting being in this situation of being a military spouse, so just be super open. Absolutely.
SPEAKER_01And so tell me about a time that you like met a friend.
SPEAKER_00Met a friend. Oh, there's been so much circumstances. I actually met someone through Facebook. Me being European, I put myself out there once I first moved to San Antonio. Yeah. And I was like, hey, I'm new to the area. Are there any military spouses that want to meet for a coffee? And I actually met someone that reached out to me and said, Hey, I'm in your exact same situation. I'm Swedish. Yeah. I'll be down to meet with you for a coffee. And I met with her for a coffee, and it was just so uplifting to knowing that I wasn't alone. Yeah. And there's more like people in my situation that left their home country to come over here and be with someone that's in the military. And it was just really helpful to know I'm not alone.
SPEAKER_01I'm sure that that's harder for you in other ways when you came from the UK to the to the US.
SPEAKER_00I think cultural culturally there's a lot of like differences. I mean, I'd been to the US a few times before moving here. I used to work and come to New York all the time, etc. But it's many challenges. I mean, food is different, the way we speak is different, you know, our cultural norms can be different. So yeah, it was a bit challenging, especially for me when I moved to Louisiana. I know when I first moved, religion was a big topic, and that for me is something super private to my heart. But people in the states are so open, especially in the south, about the religion. So that's something I had to like really like open myself to. Yeah. Yeah, 100%. But yeah, I would say it was it's it's been a journey, but it's been fun. And I've learned from so many people. No, literally same.
SPEAKER_01I feel like I wasn't really, I wasn't really myself until like these past two years when we moved to San Antonio. And let me explain that. So these before San Antonio, I was kind of like figuring myself out, figuring out this military life, figuring out like how to be a proper military spouse, and figuring out how to like I guess mesh my life into this lifestyle. And so Whitby was Whitby. That was like me trying to figure it out. And then when we came here to San Antonio, I was really like wanting to really start a community, right? Like because I really wanted other people to not necessarily feel the same way that I was feeling whenever I was isolated, whenever I didn't have any friends, and whenever like I truly just didn't have family or friends. And so when I came to San Antonio, thankfully I had my family, not my full family, but like of an extended version of my family. And then, of course, I had one of my best friends, Faith, that was already here. So that helped a lot. And so that truly helped me step into the version of myself that I am now. And that's one of the biggest advices that I give military spouses everywhere is to never forget who you are and never forget and stop doing the things that make you you. Just because you start this life doesn't mean that your life is over. It means that you're just stepping into a new version of yourself that you didn't even know existed. It could be that you still are the version of yourself, but now you live this other life. I don't know if that makes any sense.
SPEAKER_00That makes sense. And I think a lot of people put military spouses in this category of dependers. Oh my god. But yeah, dependopotamus. I hate that term. But why are we why are we dependopotomist? But we have our own personality. We're not just a military spouse, you know. It goes back to what you said of staying true to who you are.
SPEAKER_01But why are we called dependers, first of all?
SPEAKER_00Do you know you can explain it better than me?
SPEAKER_01I think that we're called dependas because the hate is louder than the positive, to be honest.
SPEAKER_00To be honest, though that sounds very true.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. The hate is so loud, though. Like it's so freaking loud. I'm not out here asking people to call me by my husband's rank.
SPEAKER_00I know.
SPEAKER_01I'm not out here doing that. Also, I feel like military spouses get a bad rep because, like I said, the hate is really loud and those T pages.
SPEAKER_00Have you seen those T pages? I haven't seen those T pages, and I don't want to see those pages. Uh I mean nosy. Yeah. I'm nosy. I don't have time for that. I'm a mom. I have two jobs. I can't be dealing with that.
SPEAKER_01I am so nosy. I I've been watching them, girl. I can imagine I don't interact though. I don't right. I don't want that negative.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, don't bring the negativity. I think we need to, you know, express positivity. And I think a lot of it comes from people not really understanding the military spouse lifestyle. That goes back to what I said earlier. Everyone thinks it's like all smooth sailing, they get free healthcare, their husband pays for everything, or or their partner pays for everything. And that's not the case. It's so there's so many blessings, but there's also so many challenges. And so what? And so what he pays for everything, girl.
SPEAKER_01So what? I want to be taken care of.
SPEAKER_00Fair enough, fair enough.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. No, I I work, but I'm low-key so jealous of the military spouses that like that stay at home and like take care of their spouse and stuff like that. Though being a stay-at-home mom, if you are a mom, is like a full-time job within itself.
SPEAKER_00Hey, last year I lost my job, and when I was at stay-at-home wife slash first-time mom, I was losing my mind. I have to work. Well, I'm gonna lose it.
SPEAKER_01Really?
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I can't just be at home.
SPEAKER_01I feel like I'm the type of person to say that I want to be a stay-at-home mom, but like if I do it for like a month or two, I'd lose my mind. I need to be busy. I don't know why.
SPEAKER_00Exactly. I remember when I first moved to the States, I wasn't allowed to work for like seven months until my green card came in, and I was losing my shit. Really? Yeah, I was losing it. I was like so bored out of my mind. There's only so many recipes and hobbies I could have had. Like my husband was getting so annoyed with me because I was bothering him because also I didn't know anyone at the time. So he was the only human that I interacted with. And literally the highlight of my life would be going to the grocery store. Yeah. Go to the grocery store. Like, I can't wait to go and do some groceries and get out of the house. I I, you know, people that want to be stay at home, you know, all means for me, I need to be active and doing something else, otherwise, I'm gonna lose it.
SPEAKER_01No, seriously. I feel like I put so much on my plate too, because I don't want to like not be busy, if that makes any sense. Like I work out at like four in the morning, then I go to my regular nine to five, and then after that, like I do baseball and based confessions. And based confessions. And then of course, like everything is so everything behind the scenes is just so much. Like I feel like a lot of a lot of people don't realize what it takes to like actually manage, produce, market a podcast. Like it's a whole business behind the scenes. Editing is the worst. 95 99% of what I do is not even the filming or editing. I believe that. It's behind the scenes. Everything is behind the scenes and it's so much work. You have to have so much bandwidth. And of course, it takes a lot. You have to be like a certain type of person to do all of that.
SPEAKER_00But with that, you've created a great thing here. I mean, I didn't know many people before I came on your podcast, and I've met so many people. I got a job. Yeah, she did. And it's just been a whole fun adventure for me. So I think what you've created here for military spouses to have their voices heard is so special. It's a beautiful thing. It's creating a big community. Yeah. And I see this becoming even bigger than it already is.
SPEAKER_01Oh, 1000%.
SPEAKER_00And if you guys could see the crowd behind us, I know. We have people here supporting us and we love it. We were both really nervous for this event, but I love that we're here and we're doing this.
SPEAKER_01Guys, TMI, but I was shitting bricks.
SPEAKER_00I was so I wanted so but it's so fun, and yeah, we get to share each other's stories, and I think that's a beautiful thing.
SPEAKER_01No, absolutely. And back to the mission of Bass Buddies, we're wrapping up soon. Yeah, we should be wrapping up soon. But back to the miss the mission of Bass Buddies. Bass Buddies was created out of a need that I experience. A military spouse. I've been a military spouse for about five years, but that's not my whole identity. Being a military spouse is way more than that. Base Buddies was created because you're more than just a military spouse. You're a human being with likes, dislikes. A human being needs connection. Human being needs friends. They need their own people that understand their struggles. And so this community was made, or I made this podcast to amplify the voices of those that are kind of hidden behind the curtain, right? But we're more than that. We're more than that.
SPEAKER_00We're a thousand percent more than that.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. And so with that being said, keep moving forward is such an important phrase to me. And it's such an important phrase in general for people all around the world. And that's why I wanted to make the theme Keep Moving Forward. And that's why the goodie bags are keep moving forward. And coming soon. Okay, coming soon, Bass Buddies merch, and also Keep Moving Forward Toads. Thank you so much for joining us on this live event and for this podcast. You guys are amazing. Stay tuned. The raffle is gonna happen, I would say, in like 15 minutes. But before we close out, do you guys have any questions for us? Questions, questions, questions? Oh, you do? Okay. Miss Ashley, can you pass the microphone, please?
SPEAKER_00Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_01So to repeat that question, she said, how do you know if you found people that are really in your community? What's your answer? What do you think?
SPEAKER_00I always go with my guard. I know that's a really typical answer, but when you meet people, you just get a good feeling. I know when I met you, I got a really good feeling about you, and we we connected. You're from Puerto Rico, I'm from Portugal. Just the vibe people give off, and also how open people are. Yeah. And also give people a chance because you can meet them at first. I've had situations where I've met someone and I'm like, they're a bit strange, but then they're one of my closest friends, like later. Because I'm strange too, so just a little bit. Just a little bit. What's your answer late?
SPEAKER_01If you don't really vibe with that person, there's no reason why you should be vibing with them at all. You know what I'm saying? Just go with your gut. Just go with your gut. Any more questions? Any more questions? Huh? What's your name? My name is Ab. Oh, I love that question. So to repeat that question is have we ever felt lonely during PCS and what helped us get through it? I love that. So yes, yeah, I've I've definitely felt lonely after this time. Who doesn't? So lonely. I mean, that's probably like one of the biggest emotions to feel after you PCS is to feel lonely, feel isolated. And what helped me get through it is honestly my spouse. My spouse. Like he has been such a great support system to me. Like he's been so supportive in everything that I do. He has been my number one fan in absolutely everything. And he's just the best guy around. Thank you, Vina. He's the best guy around. Hi, what's your name?
unknownDominic.
SPEAKER_01Dominic? Okay. Which Dominic? Which Dominic are you? The better one? That's my Dominic, guys. It feels surreal. It really does. Because what before I started this, this was just an idea. By the way, I got the idea of bass buddies because Dominic and I, we were driving literally on this plaza, by the way, on this plaza, and I was telling him, this was two years ago, 2024. I was telling him, Dang, it's really like hard to make friends. Like it's really hard. He looks at me in all seriousness. He's like, do something about it. And then I was like, I will. And so I sat with the idea for like two months. And then about eight months later, I had constructed the idea of Bass Buddies. And then I started building. And from then to here, I never imagined that I would partner with a really well-known like brand such as Black Rifle, nor did I imagine that they were going to be sponsoring a giveaway for one of you guys. And so it feels surreal. It does. And I'm really proud of myself, and I'm proud of us, and I'm proud of Bass Buddies. And thank you. Thank you. The sky's the limit.
SPEAKER_00I know that's cheesy.
SPEAKER_01The sky's the limit. That concludes the first ever podcast live event of Bass Buddies. Woo! Stay tuned. We're gonna be doing the giveaway in about 10 minutes. So just stick around, talk, mingle. I am so happy and thank you so much for coming. I love you guys. Love you guys. Bye.