Episode 26 - "I Don't Know You"

This one feels like a throwback to the AF days with just Zay and Cz holding it down for the crew. Great convo about chasing your dreams and tuning out the noise. A Deep discussion about people inside the church being obstacles instead of helping others to pursue a relationship with God. Shorter Ep but a goodie.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:03

Fellow Americans, it is with the utmost pride and sincerity that I present this recording as a living testament and regulation of history in the making during our generation. Allow me to reintroduce myself.

SPEAKER_00 0:14

My name is The Universe is predicated on the duality of chaos and order. Without these opposites to define each other, it is impossible for life to exist in any dimension. Therefore, we should accept both chaos and order as equally real and necessary.

SPEAKER_05 0:36

I can't, I don't know how y'all niggas do this shit. Yeah, like I just feel like I'm like sitting sick. That's why I started uh bringing in the high chair. Sinking, nigga. Cause I feel like this is too comfortable, bro. Yeah, nah, the high chair shit is the one, like that's the one for me. Like, I feel like I'm more alert, I'm more whatever, but like, yeah. Alright, so we lit. We recording. I ain't finna touch this shit because I don't want no problems. So I'm gonna just leave this shit like that. But we lit. Um, this is actually out here. Well, actually, no, I do. I gotta get my train. Alright, man. Yeah, we're here. Ladies and gentlemen, we are here. Back with another edition of the pod show, episode 26. I'll do a real I'll do I'll do a real intro in a few. Nigga, we was recording and I hit some shit and fucked. This is two weeks straight, though. The last time it was the computer just went dark, right? It was some shit, right? Yeah, right before we finished, the shit looked like it just shut off. It was weird too. That was nuts how that happened. Because I still can't, I still I was looking at, I was trying to look into like why that happened. Nigga, at least the shit didn't delete, bro. No, no, no, no, because that's the good thing about this software, like as we're recording, it's uploading, like while you're recording, it's uploading the file to the cloud. So you don't lose anything. Yeah, you don't lose anything. Like I got I got the first 20 minutes that we recorded already. So I could I could technically like splice it into, but I ain't doing all that shit, nigga. We just this is a new this is a new this is take two, man. We're gonna do this shit. I do wanna kind of rehab that conversation about hate because I thought that was good. So we'll start. We'll we we'll do that. It's it's it's it's I don't know if it's gonna be as good as the first one, but yeah, we'll try. Listen, Zay was bringing up a point before we started recording about support and hate and shit like that. I thought it was a good point. It was funny to me, because he said something about SoundCloud rappers, and it just like kind of opened my eyes to something.

SPEAKER_04 2:43

But say a little bit what you were saying, yeah. Nah, yeah, because we were just talking about it, right? And I was saying, like, so whenever there's somebody who's like, you know, like whenever you're following your dream or just taking a chance on something, or just like, you know, like opening a business, doing content, like doing music, whatever. Like I always I think there's always like two different types of people. There's always like one type of person that's just gonna support what you do just because they have an appreciation for somebody who's following their dreams. Like you could be doing the dumbest shit in the world. Like you come to them with the dumbest startup idea that on earth, but they're gonna support you just because just something about you chasing your dream just means something to them, and they just they just love the fact that you're doing that, like they love it for you no matter what. And then on the other side of that coin, there's people that no matter what you do, they're just gonna hate. Like they're gonna hate on what the fuck you're doing. Like, even if it's something really good, even if it's something that makes sense, even if it's something that you're really good at it, they're gonna hate on it. Because in the end of the day, like whether it's like envy or like bitterness, but like they just the fact that you're actually out there chasing your dream or doing something, like, it just eats away at them. And they're gonna eat they like any little thing, they're gonna try to grasp onto that shit. Because at the end of the day, whatever you're not like, whatever they can use to make themselves feel better about the fact that they're not chasing their dreams, they're gonna use that shit. So I the example I gave was like a SoundCloud rapper. Like me, like nigga, I used to write, I used to write raps when I was younger. I used to love doing that shit. We used to, we used to record on a fucking old computer, like in our room. We used to rap. That shit used to be like super fun. So when I see a dude like on SoundCloud or whatever they're doing now, like making music, like to me, like that shit just makes me want to like write music again. Like it motivates me. And I'm like, yo, I hope that nigga make it, man. Like, I would love to go to a show, like, especially if it's one of my boys. But then there's always gonna be like the that other side of people that's just like, nah, but you know, his shit not really hitting, bro. Like, look at his sh look at his SoundCloud. He only got like, he only got like 200 people on there or or whatever, his Spotify, you know, he only got like 200 listeners or 150 listeners. And it's just like then we have started talking about like, you know, like the podcast. It's just like, bro, like, yeah, like people don't understand, like, it's everything is in is like you have to look at it with within a context, especially when you're talking about like content creation. Like when you're in content creation, bro, you start at zero. So when people say the word, oh, you only have this much, you have to understand that context of like, bro, like we started at zero. So if you look at any, like even this podcast, if you look at our numbers, it's just like whatever it is, 20, 50, 100, like that's 50 more than what we had when we started. Like, if we get 50 views on an episode, like those 50 individuals mean something to me because at the end of the day, like, bro, we started at fucking zero, and it's one of those things, it's like everybody thinks that they can do it, but you don't understand, like, until you do it, you won't have an appreciation for 20 views on a video. Exactly. Because you have because you haven't done it, because you haven't, like, people don't understand.

SPEAKER_05 6:29

And niggas don't, and what, and why what's the biggest reason that niggas don't do the shit?

SPEAKER_04 6:33

Because they they they they scared of niggas like them that's gonna say, like, oh, but you only got five views or whatever. Because, like, yo, bro, niggas don't understand until you hit upload on that YouTube video, and then you go back the next day and you click to watch your video and you see one view, and that one view was you. Like, niggas don't understand that, like, yo, and niggas also don't know how this shit works. Yeah, like nigga, this shit has been in the world for 24 hours and nobody has clicked it. Like, when you experience it, niggas don't see it though.

SPEAKER_05 7:03

It's what I feel they don't this is what I try to tell people all the time. I feel like niggas get so caught up in the likes and the views and like the the engagement and everything. And I'm not saying that that shit is not important. That shit is the most important thing in the content world. It is, it's a fact. But when you're starting, it's actually the least important thing. Like to start, I feel like, I feel like when you're starting, when you're starting in the content world and you're doing this shit, whatever, like, bro, you gotta get you gotta get the rep, you gotta get the reps in. And and these reps before before the engagement comes, these is the most important fucking reps. Because like now, it's like, yo, you you getting your shit tight for when you have all the eyes on you, when you got everybody seeing this shit. Right now is that time. So, like, when you post that YouTube video and you go back and it's the one view or whatever, it's not that doesn't say shit about the content you posted. You gotta remember, like, nigga, algorithms exist and they are a thing, and everything runs on fucking AI and algorithms. It's not even real people deciding whether or not to push that video or not. Like, so so niggas will see that and they'll be like, oh damn, like I took an L type shit. And it's like, nigga, you ain't take you took an L what? Because a quadratic equation didn't push, didn't push your shit. Like, that shit is not real. That shit doesn't exist, it's not a person. Like, so when you go back in 24 hours and you see that you don't got whatever, it's like, bro, if I took that attitude, or if I take that attitude even today, right? I wouldn't do any of the shit that I do because my baseball content, like compared to other people who do baseball content, I feel like I put out the type of content that I put out in that realm is better than a lot of fucking people who have crazy fucking followings. As a matter of fact, a lot of time I'll say a take or put something out there way before these people, and then they go and put out the same exact take, the same exact shit I was saying, and it does a million views and it gets hundreds of thousands of likes and all that shit, whatever. And I don't get tight. I used to get real fucking mad. I used to get tight as shit. But I don't get tight anymore. Why? Why did their shit go viral and my shit not? Because of a quadratic equation. That's why. Because there was a qu there was an equation that saw their shit and said, this is the bigger account. This is the account that has the bigger following. This is the account, whatever. So we are just going, it doesn't matter what the fuck they post, it's gonna push it. But me, because I'm up and coming, a smaller account, whatever, it's like my shit gotta have hella natural motion before the algorithm decides it's gonna pick it up or not. And it's like, so that's like that shit is not is not a barometer for if your shit is good or not. I feel like when you're starting this content shit, whatever, you you really aren't gonna know if your shit is good or not for a couple of years. And I think I think people think I'm crazy when I say that shit. Because I've said this shit to people, but then they're like, oh, they're like, oh, I don't know, whatever. Like, if you're good, like it's gonna catch on right away. Nigga, no, that's not how it works.

SPEAKER_04 10:01

Yeah, it doesn't. That's not how it works, bro. We we we got and we also gotta we also gotta stop that. Like, we gotta be realistic about like what chasing your dreams and all of that shit looks like. Because you know, a lot of us are are sold these stories about like what happens or about like you know, you'll hear the rapper talk about, yeah, man, I just, you know, I was outside, I waited outside the studio for four hours. I gave this person my demo, and then next thing you know, he called me, and then shit. Two weeks later, he takes me on tour, and it's like, bro, these stories are very beautiful, but like the vast majority of people don't don't get it out the mud that way. Like, there's a reason they call it getting it out the mud. This shit is difficult, it is supposed to be difficult. It's a very, very slow burn, a very slow burn. And it's hard, bro. Like, I'll be honest with you. Like, for me, it's hard because it's just like, bro, I'm a very glass, half empty person. So it's hard for me to look like you know, like it's hard for me to look at it, you know, to look at a one view or a five views or whatever, and just say, like, damn, bro, like what why what are we still doing? But it's so true that like the most important thing you do, the most important thing that you can have isn't even views in the beginning, it's just consistency, right? Because when you do start to get those views, the reason people are gonna fuck with you is the consistency. Like, not only what is this person doing, like, does this person take what they're doing serious, right? Yeah, and what and what and what does that look like? Like if you're somebody who talks who talks baseball, like Yankees, Yankees go on a seven-game losing streak. Oh, but this nigga ain't post a video. Yankees go on a seven-game winning streak, Yankees ain't post a video. Oh, but then he posts a video next month. But it's just like as a baseball fan, you wanted that consistent. Look, where was you when this was going on? Because that's what you want to see, the consistency. You always want to, like, for me, like I listened to like the I I used to listen, like not used to, I listened to like sports radio and shit. Why one of the reasons I listen is because consistency, but yeah, you washed. I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_05 12:07

Some of the people only watch people listen to sports radio.

SPEAKER_04 12:09

Nah, bro, it's because it's because that work, bro. Like, I listen to it.

SPEAKER_05 12:12

I run I listen to it. I'm just I'm fucking with you, bodies.

SPEAKER_04 12:14

I run out of, and that's actually.

SPEAKER_05 12:16

I talk shit about Michael K. And I l I'm probably one of his most faithful listeners.

SPEAKER_04 12:19

I listen every day. No, that, but that's why that's why I listen because it's just like it's just consistency, bro. Every day at 1 p.m. You could trust him to be there. You could trust him to be there unless he has the fucking Yankee game that he's doing, which you understand, right? It's like it's it's super consistency. That that's why I like I respect what y'all do on NYYU. Nigga, Pete is calling every fucking there, every day every fucking Sunday, every Friday, like every Friday too. Like, it's just consistency. Like, I just know like I can set an alarm in my phone for Sunday night, and I know like I'm not gonna log on there, and instead of Pete and Francis is gonna be Jimmy and John talking about the Mets today, because it's just like, no, but that's what it is. Like when when you're doing something, like people, that's what they look at. Like, so when you think those first couple of episodes don't matter, or the first, or maybe your first couple like albums, like I always thought that that shit was crazy, like when somebody gets famous for music and then you go into their catalog and they got like 16 albums. I'm like, nigga, who the fuck was you making music for?

SPEAKER_05 13:25

And that and but that's what you see. Imagine. And but I always when I see that, I'm always like, and imagine if they stopped. Yeah, because the first album wasn't a hit. And that and I think that's that's my thing with with this generation that we live in, is that a lot of these, a lot of this, a lot of these people from this new generation will give up if the first if the first shit is not a hit. If they don't go quadruple platinum on the first shit, they give up. And I'm like, yo, that's not how life works. Yeah. Like, so many people don't figure shit out until they're 40, 45, or whatever. You got kids giving up at 20 years old. They're giving shit up at 20 years old. That's crazy, gang. That is absolutely nuts. It's diabolic. And we also live in a world where niggas spot over too. Cause I'm like, like most using the camera, but like, yeah, that's better. I'm on my bad. Yeah, part of you're not a camera. I'm like, that's kind of weird. It's only two of us here, so yeah.

SPEAKER_04 14:22

Nah, I was gonna say also, like, is and that like part of the reason niggas is giving up is because of the niggas that we spoke about, like the type of niggas that just hate, bro. And they be like, oh, like, nah, bro, this ain't working out, bro. Maybe you should do something else, or or maybe you should do something that's more realistic, or maybe like, oh, what's real? You too old for this, or you're too old for it.

SPEAKER_05 14:44

Like, but that's my thing. So, what's realistic anymore? But if you really think about it, what is realistic? What does that mean? Because in a world where we've seen a reality star become the president of the United States, yeah, you mean to tell me that if tomorrow I wanted to go out and say, yo, I'm gonna fucking go, I can't give it a shot. Like, I'm just saying. Like, we are living in a world, we are living in a world where millionaires, millionaires, millions, plural, are birthed from teenage kids cutting on a camera that costs 25% of the camera that I'm currently shooting this on, and hooking up their video game to the computer and having people watch them play and just shit talk to people they play with. Millionaires. Millionaire. Like, you mean to tell me in a world where that shit is, and people are gonna say, yeah, but you gotta understand, like, those stories are one in a million, one in a million. It's not as one in the million anymore.

SPEAKER_02 15:46

Nah.

SPEAKER_05 15:46

It's not as one, and that's my thing, is that yo, it's not as one in a million anymore. And people still have this attitude that, like, as if we're still living in the fucking 70s, where it's like, I don't know, like you're telling people, like, oh man, I'm mom, I'm gonna be a movie star. And they're like, come on, kids, stick to your studies. It's like, it's 2026. It's 2026. People getting famous off of their fucking phone. You know what I'm saying? People are making money off of their fucking phone. People, whatever, and and and the difference between you and those people, in my opinion, is one. They believe you don't. That's it. To me, that's the biggest difference between people who are finding success in the things they're passionate about and people who are working nine to fives and just complaining that their dreams never came true. The difference is belief. The difference is faith. That's a fact.

SPEAKER_04 16:33

Like, to me, that's what it is. Like, you, yeah, bro. You gotta be like fucking just, and that's and that's what I will say. Like, a lot of people, a lot of people fall off because they don't have that, like, maybe I don't know if may I don't know if belief isn't the word, but it's just like for you to actually like chase something, like you have to be like, can't nobody tell you nothing about it. Like you just have to, like, you have to have that. Like, bro, you're like the closest person to you, whoever that is, like you have to believe in yourself to the point where the person whose opinion you value the most could tell you, yo, I don't think this is working out, and you're like, Yeah, whatever, fuck you. Like, I'm doing this. Because like that's the only way it works. Like, you gotta have that delusion. Because, bro, the the the the truth is, is just that none of this shit is realistic when you think about it. Yeah, like because you think about it as like, all right, yeah, a lot of people make money off of this, but a lot more people fail. So when you think about like just just the numbers aspect, nigga, if everyone thought like, oh shit, like damn, bro, most people don't make it in in the music world. Most people who make a podcast don't do. If you think about it from that lens, like nobody should try anything. You heard what I'm saying? Exactly. Like, no, like you're never, you're never gonna believe in yourself. Like, if that if that's what you look at it for, like you have to believe that you're the one. You have to believe that, yeah, like they start, like a million people started. Uh, there was a crazy number a few years ago. Like when podcasts were becoming popular, it's just like I think it was like millions or thousands or hundreds thousands, right? Like a hundred thousand people.

SPEAKER_05 18:11

I would believe, I would, I would believe that a million new podcasts start every year. Yeah, like they would believe that. And they were saying that, and and then it's like when you look at that, it's just like I would say nine hundred and I would say nine hundred and fifty thousand of those same podcasts quit within the first year.

SPEAKER_04 18:27

Yeah, and it's just so when you look at like when you look at those numbers, it's just like it can be like very discouraging because it's just like yo, bro, like most of these people like give up on this. But you have to have that delusion. And if you don't have that delusion about what you do, then it's not it's not your thing. Like if you like doing music, but you don't feel delusional about music, like nah, I am I can make it because I am better than what I'm hearing. Like, if you don't feel that, then maybe music's not your thing. Exactly. Because a lot a lot of people have to differentiate something that they're good at and an actual dream. Because people will say, like, oh, you're good at this, you should do this. But if you don't feel that calling, like if you don't feel that commitment to it, you're never gonna feel like that delusion that pushes you past the haters and the doubters and the it's not that real, it's not realistic, and uh, oh bro, you're 30 years old, why are you still rapping? Oh, get a real job. Like, you need you need something that's gonna push you, even when the world tells you that you that you can't do it.

SPEAKER_05 19:32

And I think you gotta just like expect that people are gonna tell you that you can't do some shit and just do it anyway. Like, yeah, I'm I can't tell you, listen, I know look, people, you know, because people also prefer to talk shit not to your face and behind your back. So, I mean, to my face, I've never heard anybody come to my face and be like, oh, you know, this nigga C don't think he's gonna do this baseball podcast shit, but you know, that shit's not gonna, you know, I don't know who he thinks he is. He's not gonna make it with that. Or, oh, now they got the podcast, you know, with him, G, Momo Zay, whatever, and it's just oh, that shit's not gonna work out or whatever. Or any of the other shit I do. And it's like, I'm sure plenty of people have these conversations. Nobody's ever said it to me. But I'm I'm a thousand percent sure that these conversations take place. I'm here to tell you we don't care. We don't care, we don't care, we don't give a bro. I don't give a fuck. No, I don't, and why? Because at the end of the day, it's like, look, doubt me, don't believe in me. Don't I don't care at the end of the day. I'm not I'm not doing this for the people that don't believe in me. I'm doing it for the ones that do. And that's where I'm at with everything that I'm doing right now in life. Like, look, the last year, the last whatever, like, bro, I've met new people, I've worked with different people, whatever. And especially as of recently, like, I am more inspired than I have ever been doing this content creation shit. I've always obviously been inspired because I started doing this shit back in 2018. So there was always inspiration there. But I'm talking about right now in 2026, this is eight years after I started this shit, and this is the most inspired I've ever been because of conversations I've had, rooms that I've been in, things that have that have happened, transpired, and I'm like, okay, like, and am I inspired because like I got a million dollar check sitting on the table somewhere for me? No. Am I inspired because like this deal came through? Whatever. No, no, no, no, no, nothing like that. I'm inspired because I feel like somehow, someway, this shit has finally pushed me towards the avenue that like I probably should have gone down a long time ago and just didn't. And I'm like, fuck, like, okay, good. Or whatever. I ain't gonna talk about it here. But well, not yet. I'll eventually I will. But I'm just saying, like, being at that place, I'm like, okay, like it's good to see because it's like that's what I believe in. Like, that's where my faith comes from, is that I know that God always puts you on a path and always. puts you where you need to be at the time you need to be there. So like everything happens like leading up, building up to different things in your life. Like I was talking with G last week after we recorded and I was talking about like how things happen with Cado and I was like, you know what's crazy is that I remember I went on I went on that pilgrimage and I was at the pilgrimage in Spain and we went to a place before we went to the the world youth day with the Pope. We went to a place before that it was a cathedral and they told us you know ask for a grace but ask for a grace that's like tied to your vocation. And I was like you know God show me my wife I want you to show me my wife but I I said it already knowing who I wanted my wife to be so I was like show me basically that she is my wife because I know that she's my wife and if God is not the fucking greatest the very next day that's the first time in my life that I ever laid eyes on Kato. That's the first time I and I'll never forget that fucking day. I'll never forget that day. I can tell you what she looked what she looked like what she had on she had on the yellow shirt that they gave you at the World Youth Day thing and she had on these shades that were white frames with black lenses and she had two pigtails like braids or whatever. That's the first day I laid out I didn't know her she didn't know me. We didn't know shit about shit about each other nothing like that. That's the first day I saw her the day after I asked God to show me that and I had no idea literally had no idea I saw her and I kept it moving. Nigga I didn't say a word to how to do I want to know about my life nigga it was four years later that I actually started dating her and all that whatever. And then I was like oh yeah I did I actually saw you for the first time at World Youth Day in 2011 and it was like huh what? Yeah yeah yeah that's when I saw you for the first time but I still didn't put two and two I put two and two together after we got like close to getting married I was like oh shit I remember like yo I asked God like yo show me my wife and he deadass did he deadass showed me her but I didn't even fucking know and I was like that's crazy because that's how he works. My intention wasn't pure I was asking him I was like yo show me this but I was saying it already wanting something different you know in my heart. So he said I'm gonna show you her but the problem is you are coming to me with a doubleness in your heart. You're not coming to me with the purest intention so though I'm gonna show it to you you ain't gonna be able to see it. That shit is nuts brother because I'm like yo he he legit show me and I didn't even fucking know like that's the beauty of shit. So I'm saying that to say like shit had to you know build up to that like what's the shit can you say turmoil had to build like shit shit had to build up to that and then eventually it's like okay nigga we here now this is where you're supposed to be while I finally feel like in content world I'm I'm almost I'm almost fucking there. Like the shit with the MYU stuff we're about to launch from from the studio first DS um tomorrow night obviously when you guys are hearing this it's last night uh but if you ain't watched it definitely go to MOY underground on YouTube and watch the latest episode of Designated Spitters that we will have shot from the studio. But that's only part of it. That's only part of it. I'm doing a lot of other stuff we got the fucking pie show that we're doing we still chugging along and I'm like I'm happy about that shit bro because I look like I to this is episode 26 like we never got this far in any iteration of the show. No that's a fact this is the farthest we've gotten in any iteration of the show and this has been the hardest to do it and we've done it. Like think about it think about all the shit that we've had going on all the shit that we've had to do this time around and we still made it this far I mean obviously it sounded a little crazy saying that because we're doing an episode where it's like and then there were two momo obviously Momo Momo's still out on paternity leave you know shouts out to him. He definitely wants to pod he hit us up with a with an idea but that just it wasn't possible. He hasn't heard the last episode by the way either so he lost out on 20 bucks I'm sorry Mo but it happens um and then G G is really sick this week um and then he also just hit us up and said that his daughter's also really sick. So prayers up to them hope you know hopefully speedy recovery from you know for them yeah straight up gotta get and that's why and I can't talk about I can't talk about meeting my wife and all that without saying our wedding anniversary is Tuesday. Yeah yeah so nine years Tuesday we make nine years married so shouts out to where does the time go I know it feels like that shit was yesterday where the fuck does the time go feels like that shit was yesterday.

SPEAKER_04 26:48

I mean if it was yesterday I still would have had a chance to get out of it but nah I'm fucking around she knows I love her with all my heart and I wouldn't trade her for the world shout out to Kato for dealing with the most impossible nigga on planet earth the most difficult puzzle that God has ever created but when you solve a puzzle palette of allergies but when you solve a puzzle anyone could ever cook for but when you solve a puzzle there's no feeling quite like solving a puzzle.

SPEAKER_05 27:19

Nigga she still ain't solve you nigga don't feel let me tell you something about puzzles we're gonna get to God niggas love puzzles niggas love puzzles niggas love puzzles you when there's no feeling like that you get of gratification like when you solve a fucking puzzle that's how you know this nigga a nerd bro niggas do not love puzzles bro nobody loves puzzles when I don't know bro I fucking hated puzzles. When niggas there's a whole market there's a whole market for the shit niggas you're technically a puzzle it's a physical puzzle.

SPEAKER_04 27:52

Legos is fire bro all them shits do is get stuck under your feet and hurt them shits is Legos is fire and and I'm gonna tell you I'm gonna tell y'all this right now don't ever get my child no fucking Legos bro I'm about to get Grace and some Legos for this I don't want no young which is also on my anniversary so shout out to my godson Gray Gray tearing up the world you know I'm saying just smoking everybody's boots out there's not on racist level bro his birthday coming bro and I thought that I avoided it and I didn't avoid it because this nigga is finally going through the phase that every kid goes through bro what phase six seven oh shit bro he now it's worse it's worse that your kid is on it now he started doing it bro like he started watching because all the other kids all the other kids stopped it yo bro he yo that's that shit it's like an addiction bro like my yeah they can't they can't that's why niggas was trying to say that shit was demonic because they was yo kids can't stop saying bro I'm like no it's not even when he first watched some vote but we had shit like that too that we couldn't stop saying no that's a fact that's I'm trying to remember one that we used to say when we was younger I mean all type of shit bro like I mean why's that the shit from scary movie niggas was doing that shit that shit definitely it was mad shit and we used to we used to just say dumb shit like we like niggas would come to school we used to be like yo are you gay and we'd be like no all right does your mother know you're gay and be like huh no it's like I don't want you gay then like you should have told her yeah I don't know why like we just we do all types of stuff the name five cereal shit like every time somebody exactly name five cereals like every time somebody talk about the shit that today's kids do I'm like bro we used to do like legitimately dumb shit like legit and the difference with us was we didn't have another idiot on social media that we saw do it first and we just following we just did it we just came up with the vibe and we just did it but trends trends were trends passed by word of mouth back in the day which was which was actually pretty dope because like you would go to like different places and see people on different shit.

SPEAKER_05 29:57

No that's a fact now with social media some shit'll get trending and then everybody all across the country all across the world globally is doing the same shit but the dope shit about when we were growing up is that social media wasn't a thing so like we had shit as Brooklyn niggas that we did. Bronx niggas had their own shit Harlem niggas had their own shit Queens niggas had their own shit you know what I'm saying then you left New York and you went to like Philly and they had their own shit facts you went to Florida Florida had their own shit Cali was on their own shit Texas they was the South they was on their own shit like I feel like now shit'll be trendy and then everybody's just on the same wave like that's why it's so hard to find originality or whatever because everybody's like oh that's the wave I'm jumping on that you know I'm saying like I'm gonna do it's so different. Like when we were growing up I felt like like traveling was just such a different experience because people were just on different waves and I I feel like that's what made like being from different places that's what made it dope because you would actually see different and people don't have that same need to like be original like that. People don't do original shit they don't try their own thing like their way with their sauce because they feel like if I do that and it doesn't get like a hundred a hundred thousand likes and and I don't get like 5000 followers then like I'm I'm a dub like it didn't work out whatever. And it's like and so they they're afraid to do it because they feel like they're not getting rewarded for their originality and I'm like that's that's an unfair thing because people don't realize like when you put when you open up a brand new account on Instagram or you start a YouTube channel or you start whatever it is that you start like your your shit is not being put in front of people. Yeah like promotion that's why promotion is so important that's why we're always ending every episode saying yo support is free like promote because right now in the stage that we're in that's what's gonna help us grow. Now once you've already established a base and everything that's when the algorithm starts to push your shit and put your shit into you know in front of new eyes and new people and stuff like that or whatever without you doing it on your own. But in the beginning you're putting your content out there and it's being judged by a quadratic equation. So you're getting tight and getting sad like yo people don't fuck with me man my shit is whack. Maybe I had a trash it's not even it's not even people it's an equation telling you an algorithm it's an equation that don't fuck with you. Like you don't sit there and think people don't fuck with you because the algorithm don't fuck with you. The algorithm is AI in equations bro like that's not a real person. It's not a real thing. The algorithm and it doesn't necessarily reward originality the algorithm sees if something is trending and whatever is trending it's gonna flood that shit why because if it's trending it's getting engagement and the algorithm is literally engineered and then to drive engagement. That's what it is.

SPEAKER_04 32:41

And the algorithm the thing is is that it works like both ways. So just like you know your shit is not going to get to the people that maybe you would want to like watch consume your content also like as a consumer you're not gonna see the new and up and coming podcast. Exactly it's not gonna show up it's not gonna show up when people tell me so that's the thing too like like our podcast wouldn't like our clips if I didn't post them myself wouldn't show up on my feed exactly what would show up on my feed is already established guys or you know like people who maybe even like paid for their own sponsoring and stuff but like our shit wouldn't show up but the reality is our shit would be the perfect content for me but it wouldn't show up for me because again like they're gonna push what's trending they're gonna push yeah they're gonna push what's popular.

SPEAKER_05 33:32

And that's the shit that I'm telling so I think people have it fucked up I'm realizing this now I've been doing content since 2018. It's taken me eight years to come to this realization but I'm so happy that I did now and what I'm realizing is the people come before the algorithm the algorithm doesn't precede the people the people precede the algorithm which means what am I saying what I'm saying is is that the algorithm copies what people do. People think that the key is I gotta copy what the algorithm's doing so that the algorithm likes me. And it's like nigga no the algorithm is copying people. So you have to get the people first like okay on the pie show our job is to put shit out right and then get promotion from the people that we know the people that like us the people that like the content whatever nucleus we have the 100 200 views whatever all that shit 300 whatever it is whatever number that is maximize those people because once we maximize those people then the algorithm will come in into play and start picking up on what those people are promoting. That's how it works. It's not like nah bro we gotta do something that the algorithm fucks with it's like it's it I don't it doesn't really work like that. And in order to do what I'm saying it's not gonna happen in a week a month it's gonna take time.

SPEAKER_04 34:49

We're only 27 episodes in and that's why the support is so important because when you send the pie show or clip of the pie show to somebody else you are now influencing their algorithm so and now the algorithm sees that this person who they wouldn't have recommended the pie show to has watched this clip of the pie show and now follows the account of the pie show or clicks on it or watches more of their videos. So now their algorithm knows that they like that type of content. So they're gonna gear them towards this type of content which before you shared that video with them the algorithm wouldn't have because the algorithm doesn't take like yeah it doesn't take into account that the you know the mom who just watches videos of other people cleaning also wants to watch sports videos or WWE videos. Like they don't take into account like the fact that you want to branch off from the same shit that you always do. Like how many times do you see people that they be they be like ah I have to take a break from Instagram I have to take a break from TikTok and it's like why it's like ah I just be wasting too much time you know it's the same old shit and it's just like because that's what the algorithm is it's gonna show you the same shit the same shit the same shit like I look like now like my algorithm right now is just baseball WWE videos I don't know why bro I went to fucking Rhea Ripley's and BBLs and just yeah and bottle girls but it's just like that but that's the shit though like my shit is I don't even actively search for that that's just what the algorithm is and I cannot escape the algorithm like my only way now is I gotta make a whole I gotta make a whole new Instagram because it's like we said like once the algorithm decides that this is the content for you this is what they're gonna show you.

SPEAKER_05 36:40

And even if you made a new Instagram you're still gonna end up seeing a lot of the same shit because geology has a lot to do with it too. People don't realize that people say oh you made new account whatever it's like mm mm nah you still live in the same place you're still in the same place so some of the shit on your algorithm is tailored based on geography. You understand? I said geology before it's geography like that shit matters so like living in like being from the Bronx like there's certain things that they're showing to people from the Bronx you know what I'm saying like being from New York in general there's certain things they're showing to people from New York in general being American there's certain things that they're showing to us they're not pushing in Europe you know what I mean like and vice versa like all that shit comes into play but my point that I'm trying to make is like I'm not gonna not fucking pursue things that like I have opportunities in or that I'm passionate about because of what a quadratic equation says the first time I do it. You know what I'm saying? And it and it's weird there's really no rhyme or reason I'll tell you and here's why I'll tell you this um before we move on bro my content on Instagram is interesting like it's interesting to see my most manicured content I'm talking about my most highly produced content I'm talking about shit that we've done with videographers shit that I've done you know shot in 4K with the cleanest audio uh you know fucking backgrounds and all that shit whatever that's my lowest performing content my lowest performing content like I don't know like if people probably hearing this and they maybe don't get what I'm saying but it's like I'm trying to tell you that like the stuff that I've spent the most time on producing is the lowest performing shit. Make that shit make sense. So if I'm sitting here and and and why did I why did I do that? Because I'm like oh this like isn't that what the algorithm wants it's like because the videos that are being promoted to me are like heavily produced very manicured 4K great audio this and that so I'm like okay that's what the algorithm wants so that's what I got to do.

SPEAKER_04 38:35

That's what works.

SPEAKER_05 38:36

So I went and I did it I did it a couple like I did I did I remember I did one at uh talking about the WBC and I can't say that's my lowest performing because it actually over time it's performed decent like pretty well um but I did that one I got the good background pulled the camera closer was able to do it in 4K audio's clean points are good concise the time limit is pretty good too I think it's under three minutes all of that shit um but I have a video that I shot it literally took me what three minutes to do it's like a one minute long video me in my car talking about Cam Schlittler like in the car driving talking about Cam Schlittler and it it literally it's four times more engagement than the freaking video that I literally took me an hour and a half to produce like bro when I saw that I was like what the f so I was like this I was like nah this I was like it's a it's a it's a random it's a blip it's a blip so I did another car video same thing did another car video same thing I was like all right let me do a series preview but I'm gonna do it on the car same fucking thing explain to me make it make sense that Instagram when it comes to me Francis Lee Don Francis Cito whatever you know me Cito Leo however you know me when it comes to me Instagram prefers me in the car the consumer does apparently me in the car driving or whatever I'm talking about no fucking high res camera no fucking$500 microphone no fucking program that cost money none of that shit it don't give a fuck it don't care about none of that shit I get in the car and cut the iPhone on and talk for a minute Instagram loves it explain that explain it so that's what I'm saying if you're gonna sit there and play algorithm games you're gonna drive yourself crazy just do the content do what you want to do what you want to freaking do. And I'm telling you it it there's I'm when it's really crazy is what I said before on the other part that got cut off because the camera bugged out is that bro if you would have asked me a year ago like okay like what type of content are you the best at I would have told I would have said baseball. I would have been like yo it's the Yankees content because part of it was to that point to this it's my most successful content overall right when you look at the success of MOY underground and all of that I'm like okay yeah like it's gotta be that but then on my personal Instagram right when I'm posting clips of me from MOYU and me from just talking baseball like on my own and stuff like that or whatever that is lower performing than the talks that I did on Faith during Lent. Yeah and lower performing than two videos that I did just on a whim this past week where I wasn't talking about baseball or faith. One I was talking about 420 passing and me not even realizing that it was not a thing anymore. And the other one I was talking about that they try to change the meaning to lean with it rock with it. And in a day I'm talking about in one day them shits eclipsed the engagement of videos that I spent hours on like hours I'm talking about pulling pictures and all the shit and then cropping and adding it and the subtitles and everything bro the subtitles I'm bro I mean I can't tell you how like when I fucking realized this shit how pissed off I was nigga like I pay for services. Because you put in mad work I put in mad fucking work and I pay mad I pay services to help manicure the fucking clips and the clips that are fucking doing the numbers for me that are and not just doing the numbers in terms of engagement but I mean like actually bringing new followers and shit to me is the shit that I'm shooting in the car. And I did three videos a lot because I did a I did one when I was taking Cara to the Romeo and Prince Royce concert or whatever and it was I was joking. I was like whatever I was like yeah nah because whatever and it's like bro and the funny thing I was with Splow on Thursday and I was like I was like oh I appreciate it because I I was like I was like appreciate you saw the video and you left a comment or whatever. He's like yeah bro he's like he's like he was like it's the first time one of your videos came up on my feed you know how mad I was I said wait a minute wait a minute you talking about me spending hours on some shit putting it through the shit for the subtitles clipping this putting pictures doing that whatever and doing all those clips and they don't even appear on a nigga's timeline the one that appears on the timeline is me driving in the car on the way to a concert talking about Romero and Prince Royce better not try no shit with my wife because I ain't the one or whatever like that that's the shit that appears on his timeline. That's the fucking nigga that's the fucking I'll go kidding me bro are you kidding me like that's the shit that fucking works so again I learned this lesson and I'm running and I'm gonna run with it. If that's what if that's what it likes then that's what it likes. But guess what? That's what I like at the end of the day when I'm posting vid when I'm when I'm talking like that see people don't know just by following me on Instagram until now they don't know that that's the that's the truest version of me like that's who I am like that's that's what I on on a daily basis that's probably who I am most part of the day. Like baseball is a big part of my life it's my passion I love it but I'm not talking about baseball all day long. I'm not talking about the Yankees all day long especially not now that I have a podcast nigga I save my points for MOY underground you want to hear what I think about the Yankees subscribe my nigga like and subscribe watch me on Sunday. Straight up buy a hat you know I'm saying I appreciate you buy a shirt gang you know what I'm saying heart of the city you know I'm saying heartotc.com I've been getting some sales there I appreciate it but even Zay said that shit on the other part that got clipped like nigga people can see that and be like oh you see that's why I don't start a brand because like you know I seen C started his brand but like I don't I don't see people fucking with it okay you might not see people fucking with it but I can promise People are buying the shit. Like, is it the people that I expected? No. To be honest with you, I expected there's there's a lot of people on the list that I thought would have, you know, supported me and whatever, like that. And I'll be real with you, bro. I'm a level. I am surprised because I launched in October, right? October, I launched in October. We are in April, almost May. So you're talking about November, December, January, February, March, April. So six months. Six months, half a year, right? And shouts out to the six-month mark for my clothing brand. In six months, the sales and shit that I've gotten, yo, is, and I appreciate everybody that's bought, everybody that's purchased, everybody that's supported. I love all of you. This is not a knock on ya. What I'm saying is there were people that I was like, oh no, for sure this one's gonna get something. Like for sure, this one's gonna buy a shirt. For sure this one's gonna get a hat. For sure this one's gonna get a hoodie. You know what I mean? Nothing. And then the most, not the most random, but just people that I'm like, you know, I wouldn't have minded if they didn't get anything. You know, I would I don't expect them to buy. They're the ones out there going and buying my shit, supporting my shit, posting my shit. Like, even like I'm like, damn, gang, really? But again, just goes to show. Do if you got a passion, do your fucking passion, stick to it, put your shit out there. Right now, I got mad shit going on, and I'm sure I got mad people like, I don't know who does this, who does this nigga think he is? Like, this nigga got to a certain age and just decided like he's a podcaster, uh fucking clothing designer. Now he now he probably think he's a comedian, like nigga just doing all types of different shit. Like, who you think he is? I'm gonna tell you who I think. I think I'm me. I'm just all of this shit, I'm just being me. This is my blood brother next to me. Like, is anything that you see, is any of this out of character for me? Yeah, because you a fake ass nigga.

SPEAKER_04 45:48

Suck my nigga. Nah, I mean, like the the the shit is, I mean, I like from my from my recollection, like you've always been like a nigga that's just not, you know, that's just not shy to just explore like your opportunities and just to pick something up, like, and just like from what I remember, like, when you find interest in something, like you literally like you put you put your mind to it and you just like focus. Like, I feel like like I feel like you were good, like we used to be in in a marching band together. Oh yeah, facts. You were really good at like playing the snare drum. Like for me, I never saw you go to a music class to learn how to play the snare drum. I saw you watch drumline and just start playing with drumsticks, yeah. And then two weeks later you were like a prodigy. And I know that that that sounds like glaze, but that's my literal recollection. No, but niggas don't believe it. This nigga never went to like a music class. It was never something that they taught him. Nigga just walked in one day and he was a big thing.

SPEAKER_05 46:52

But do you remember how I started like trying to play the drums? Like because I didn't have a drum, I didn't have nothing, and I didn't have drumsticks. Nah. Do you remember what I used? Was it the the cardboard? No, but do you remember what I used as drumsticks? Was it spoons? Toothbrushes. Ah, yeah, yeah. Toothbrushes. Like, I I I could I guarantee you that today.

SPEAKER_04 47:13

Toothbrushes and pots. Why don't I fuck I remember pots?

SPEAKER_05 47:16

I tried everything to try to get like the sound of a snare drum, but it it was, and I tried some, I tried it. It just was not good. But gang, like watching drumline over and over and over and over and over again, and then picking up toothbrushes and just learning the cadences from drumline. That's how I learned how to play the snare. And like I'm not half the player that I was when we were in the band and shit like that. Because I was at one point, and a lot of niggas say this shit about a lot of shit. So I hate doing it, but it's like, it is what it is. The people who know me and the people who saw me at that time, they know I was fucking him with the snit. I was fucking nice. Like, there was nothing you saw Nick Cannon do in that movie, I couldn't do. There was nothing, there was nothing that you so watch drumline, think of whatever, like all that shit. The freaking flip, drop the stick, throw it up, catch it, all that shit. All of it, nigga. I did all that shit. I did all that shit. That sounded a little bit crazy. I had I had to do it to myself because I realized Yeah, I realized I was like, I was playing, drop the stick, throw the stick. That's a little bit crazy. Yeah, niggas, but uh drum, that's crazy. But uh, but um, but nah, like I was really I I toothbrushes.

SPEAKER_04 48:25

I learned off toothbrushes. But no, that's why I say like I say that to say like nigga just would just like put his mind to something that interested him and nigga would just fucking go for it. And that's like that's why like I don't like I don't be surprised because it's just like like I like that's the thing. Like I believe, and then it's it's it's kind of like a contagious thing. Like when people see that you're the type of person that like you're fearless in that way, like that's like that's the type of person that people feel deserve an opportunity because they're like, no, I know this person's gonna take it serious because I see all the ways that this person has taken other opportunities serious. Like I see what he has made out of like what he has done in the past or whatever. And regardless of like success, sometimes all people want to see is just someone who's legit gonna give something a legit try. Like, yeah, because the there's nothing that turns people off more than somebody who doesn't believe in themselves, like and half half asses. Yeah, like hey man, you should do this. Like, oh man, I don't know. I will, you know, I'll see. Like, nobody wants to fucking hear that. Like if you believe an opportunity, why should they believe in you? Yeah, like nobody who has an opportunity to give wants to hear, I'll see, or I don't know, or I think what they want to hear is, yeah, I think that could work. Let's do it. Like, and that's just a nigga, a nigga who believes in himself because at a certain point, maybe you didn't think that fucking talking about baseball will work, right? But I did it in the beginning. You put all your you put your all into it, and the shit, the shit just worked out.

SPEAKER_05 49:59

I'll be real with you, I didn't. Nigga, when when Pete came to me with the opportunity to do a couple videos for his channel, whatever this is 2018, and I was like, I don't know if I could do that. Like, I'm I'm not a YouTuber, I'm not whatever. Like, I was like, I can't. And Gato was like, what the fuck you mean you can't? Like, I hear you talk about baseball all the fucking time. Everybody, like, anytime something big happens in baseball, like something big happens, and I know something happens because 10 people call you to talk to you about it. Like, people like to talk to you about this sport, they which means that they like to hear what you have to say about what's going on. Like, you could definitely freaking do this. And I was like, all right, cool. And even with that, like, I'm not gonna lie, the first couple videos, man, they weren't, they weren't all that. Like, they were good enough. Like, Pete took it and was like, okay, like this, this is okay. I'll put it on the channel, and it worked. But when I look at what we're doing now on that channel versus where I started, even where he started, like, it's night and day. Like, we get we we're so much better now. It's so, it's it's so much, it's such a different production. Like, you guys are gonna see when when y'all see what we're doing this season with um designated spitters and everything from the studio, it's like everything is so different. And but it started there, is what is the point. You know what I mean? Like, it started with all right, let me throw myself out there. And yeah, like I said, I'm about to I'm about to do that with a with a lot of other things now. And um I'm confident. I mean, obviously, I'm not I'm not doing something that's too far for me to be real. Like, I'm not, like, it's something that I've been passionate about my entire life. Like, I'm gonna tell you right now, there's a there's a couple of things, there's a few, there's a few things in my life that like matter to me the way like these four things have mattered to me, right? I'm not gonna I I don't put faith in there because faith to me is overarching in everything. Like God, like nigga, we grew up in the church. Our parents were in the church, they were in the way, like we grew up in that. So that to me, it's unfair. I can't compare that to anything else because it's always gonna trump everything else. It just is. But for me, what's like like sports, nigga? I've loved sports since I was a child. Like, bro, we were watching, we watched the Yankees as kids in Brooklyn, you know what I'm saying? Like watching playoff games, being having being told to go to sleep in the sixth inning, and then like sneaking and going to watch the rest of the game. Like, you know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? Like, shit, like, you know what I'm saying? So sports is like that's everything. That shit is ingrained. Then you got, then you got like the music aspect of it, right? And that's why, like, you know, we ended up both of us like dabbling and like making music and everything like that, and whatever, like, because like music has always been a part of our lives, and it's always been a passion. Like, for me, it was it's a freaking passion. Like, I love rap music, I love hip-hop. I feel like it's it's something that's it's in the DNA. I think I think G said that on one episode um, you know, months back, like, yo, like it's it's it's like part of who I am, type shit. And it's like, yeah, same. Like, that's why I ended up like doing that. But also, like, there was a part of me that was like, yo, like I'm smart, like I write lyrics, whatever. To me, it sounds good. Like, I wanted to like try it with other people, and yeah, I tried it, and other people would tell me the same thing. I'm like, nah, yo, you you nice, like yo, this is good, or whatever. Now, did it work out? No. I didn't did I try for it to work out, like really like go and like whatever. Uh, I I think I gave it a kind of like a cursory look, but I never put my all into it. I never put my all into it. I never did. Um and then I mean, like, so you I'm saying you got you got sports, you got music, like, I mean, you could add, you could throw comedy in there, like nigga just uh my love for stand-up and all of that shit. Like, bro, did I make you watch Delirious? Yeah, all right, Delirious was the one you watched. Did you did you see Raw yet? Eddie Murphy Raw? I might have. I feel like I seen two from I'ma hit the button because I got I I gotta hit the button because in 2026, Eddie Murphy would not have been able to call that special Raw. That just sounded a little wild, but but um I feel like I seen two of his specials. I might have been the two. Okay, so then do you remember Vicious Circle, Dane Cook? Yeah, that one I remember. Okay, you do you remember how many fucking times I watched that shit? Yeah, it was a lot.

SPEAKER_04 54:20

I feel like you used to watch everything a lot.

SPEAKER_05 54:22

Yeah, no, I I used to watch everything a lot. Like, I also I do the same thing.

SPEAKER_04 54:25

Nigga used to binge watch the same shit over and over instead of just moving on.

SPEAKER_05 54:29

Because when I like something, like I become obsessive about it. So, like, but Dane Cook was one of the stand-ups, and it's weird because like he's not my favorite comic by any stretch of the imagination. But Dane Cook Vicious Circle to me, like that to me, that was his peak as a comedian. Like, there's no argument. I don't I don't think anybody could argue with that. But I mean, also just in comedy in general, Dane Cook. If you guys like stand-up comedy, if you're into that kind of thing, and you haven't seen Dane Cook Vicious Circle, that stand-up, go and watch that. Like, bro, that to me is a comedian just flow state fucking genius, like in his fucking bag for an hour. You know what I mean? Like, he did Dane Cook, like he did him for an hour, and like it was just, and that's why I played that shit out, bro. Like, I I mean me and Johnny watched that shit a million times. I think Izzy Izzy definitely saw it with us. Yeah, I made you watch it. I mean, I made bro I anybody like I brought made mad people watch it, like whatever. Um, and then moving on, obviously, then you had the newer ones that came in. You had like uh when Cat Williams had his run, obviously, the what's it called? American was it American Hustle or was it Pimp Chronicles? It was one of those that no no because whichever the one is where he does the crypto kind of come to light and he has the green on, that one that is the one for me with Cat Williams. Like that one is fucking that's that's that to me, that was Kat, that was Cat Williams' peak. And it's not that he's not still funny. He has a one, he had one that came out recently. It's not it's funny, it's not the best, but it's it's good for sure. Um, he's he's amazing at what he does. But like that one, yeah. It's the crypto chronic conduite nigga or whatever. Like that one, that that was the one. Like that was the one. I watched that shit a thousand freaking times by myself. Like, that's it.

SPEAKER_04 56:14

That shit was mad funny.

SPEAKER_05 56:16

Gang, is that this is what I'm talking about. It's not like, oh, like I like stuff, like, but it's like I like it, like do it with people like like no no no like I'm talking about when it comes to sports, music, comedy, and like, but like this is shit that I will do alone. Like, I will sit down in my crib and turn on like an album. I'll play blueprint just chilling. I'll put on fucking Cat Williams, I'll put on fucking Dave Chappelle. Let's not even fucking talk about like uh Dave Chappelle. The once he the all them shits that he did with Netflix, man, I played them shits out. Equanimity, the bird to be like just played them shits out completely, bro. Because I love I feel like there's such a genius in stand-up comedy, the way that some people do it. You know what I mean? And I relate to that because I feel like I don't think I don't think the world puts enough respect on how powerful being able to talk to people is like look at what look at what we do at the church, like the catechesis, right? Like what is what is the basis of the catechesis? Like, what is the freaking sauce? What is what does it? How is the faith transmitted? Just like fucking people talking, talking and people have to talk, you know what I mean? And it's like these are people who aren't professional speakers, they're not fucking orators and whatever. It's like, no, this is regular freaking people that get up there and give their experience in a room full of people, could be 10 people, could be 20, could be 30, could be 40, could be 50, 60. It doesn't matter. You get up there and you talk. And somewhere along the way, you know what I'm saying? The Holy Spirit does his thing, and people are like, oh shit, like God He might love me. Like he loved this dude, and this dude ain't shit. According to him, he's saying it, not me. Like he's saying he ain't shit. He's saying God still loves him. I might have a shot. I ain't as bad as this nigga. This nigga sounds terrible, and he's up here talking to the church. Like, and that's how it works. I don't think people put enough respect on that, how powerful that shit could be. I think Dave Chappelle is a genius who's realized that, like, bro, comedy is the conduit for me to give to send a message to the world, and like he does it in such a genius way. I mean, this mother, he's a genius, bro. He's a genius, and then you know, then you got your Kevin Hart to the world, who's like more like the mainstream pop culture, but like go back to Kevin Hart, what is it, grown little man, seriously funny? Like, to me, that those were his peak. I think what now might have been the end of it for me. Like his last ones aren't like bad where I'm just like, oh my god, this guy's terrible, he should give it up. No, but I mean, when you go back to like grown little man, seriously funny, what now, like I think those those those are on like their own level. Definitely peaked.

SPEAKER_04 58:49

Yeah, yeah. And I'm like, nigga, that shit is fucking it's it's difficult. Like, it's one of those things, like you get an appreciation for it because you you see like how difficult it, you know, it is. And it's just like it's one of those things, like you gotta, like some people, you know, some people have it, I would say, and then some people don't. But you'll you'll never like you'll never know if you have it, like if you don't actually just go up there and just give it that shot. Like for like for me right now, like like our community is doing like the great mission. And it's just like, bro, asking people to give their experience, that shit is like fucking pulling teeth. Of course. Like, because that shit is scary. And the shit that people always tell me, regular people, yeah. Like, oh, but it's easy for you. I'm like, no, it's not fucking easy for me. It wasn't easy for me for a long time, but you know what I realized? Like, I realized that like you know, when I get when you get up there, bro, what you say is not actually like important, yeah. But it's more so just the fact that like people can walk past, see someone who looks like them, or who reminds them of maybe somebody they know or just somebody from the neighborhood, and they just see you speaking just truthfully, like speaking your truth, like unapologetically, and then like it's everything, it's everything but what you say. It's the fact that you like woke up in the morning and you're standing on the fucking corner of third Ave with a priest that got like a fucking huge sun umbrella, and it's just like, bro, like this has to be the work of the Lord because this why does this man find himself here? Like, why are these people here doing this? I'm like, bro, the experience is it's it's almost like an afterthought. It's like it almost feels like you could get up there and say anything just because like somebody walks by, it's just like, oh my god, like this, if they see it for what it is, it's just like like this is beautiful. Like, you know what I'm saying? Like, even if you get up there and just say, Listen, man, like I feel like God didn't love me, and today I can tell you I feel the love of God, and you just like that that can be it because you can see like how how it has manifested, but it's just it's one of those things, like you can't like I can't like feel that for somebody else. Like, you just have to get up there and do it, and then what what everybody tells me was, oh, it wasn't that bad. And it's like because it really like you know, it it it really isn't, but you like you gotta have like the confidence just to actually go and do it. Because it's like you said, like the way like the faith is transmitted just in talking, like people have to hear you, like they they they have to hear like what what you have to say for better or for worse. And for the people who aren't good at talking, they need to hear that too. Like they need to hear that you're uncomfortable saying certain things, but that you're still saying oh for sure. Because if it's because it's like any it if it's too easy to say, like somebody used to tell me, like, if if you never have like feel a problem talking about something, then that's not really the thing that makes you suffer. Like the thing that actually makes it. It's too easy for you to speak about, that's not exactly it's an experience, but maybe it's not the thing. Like they like, um Yeah, your biggest sufferings in life, they cost you to talk about. Exactly. Like that's the shit that like you it may take you a while to say, exactly, or maybe you're gonna get choked up a little bit. But it's the shit that you get the most out of when you do exactly, like when you find like when you finally like give it up, because it's just like you know what I'm saying? That at the end of the day, it's just you know, no matter who you're talking to, like you could be talking to your community, you could be talking to all the people of third half, but it's just like anytime in that context you speak, like you're having you're also having a dialogue with God, and you're able to like really give like what you what you have learned and what you have been given. And the thing is, is that there's some people in this world, and it's very sad, like when you think about it, they've never had that dialogue, they've never, and they don't even think that the opportunity is there for them. And I think that's what actually is great, like, about the great mission, is the fact that like, bro, like when you think about it, so crazy, like there's really people walking this earth that think that it's too late for them.

SPEAKER_05 1:03:06

Exactly. Like, they still got breath in their lungs, still have a beating heart, and they think that their life, their destiny is already written. There's no there's no hope for them. That there's no hope.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:16

That God forgives everybody else, but not but for them, he won't forgive them. What they did is too wrong. But they, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_05 1:03:23

And so fucking wrong. Like it's the worst thing that anybody could possibly think. Exactly. I think that's what the devil wants. Everybody in the world, like, if he can convince you that it's too late for you, there's no hope, nigga, he won. That's what he wants.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:35

You almost feel like that, it's like you feel like that, like that was like I feel like when I started looking at it like that, that's when I felt the responsibility because it's like, bro, like I am privileged that everything I went through, like everything I went through, I always knew in the back of my mind, and I always had obviously my siblings, my parents to tell me, like, God loves you, what are you doing? Like, pray, pray. Like, so nothing I ever went through, like I really like felt like it would be too late for me or whatever. But like, there's really people walking this earth that they're just like, they're just like buying time until they're death. Like, it's like I'm going to hell, bro. Like somebody, like, I forgot who it is, but they always make the joke, like, bro, if I walked in the church, I would burn. And I'm just like, bro, if you I probably light on fire and shit. Yeah, and it's just like, bro, if you only knew the actual people inside that church that have done things 10,000 times. But it's times worse than what you think you've done.

SPEAKER_05 1:04:30

It's also part of, and this is one of the things that troubles me the most about people in the church, and it saddens me in a sense, because I feel like, and this is not everybody, because obviously, like I've like I said before, like we've been in church our whole lives. Like, I've met the greatest people in the church. I've met the greatest people, like going in mission and and all that stuff. Like, I've met literally the greatest freaking people. And then I've also met you know, some people that you know, God's still working with them, obviously, sure, like for sure. What bothers me the most is the people that are there that make it feel like it's this exclusive club and that like you gotta be good enough to get in. Like, that's literally the opposite of the idea of the church, and it's like niggas don't get that shit. Like Jesus Christ did not create his church to be an exclusive club. This was literally the one thing that was supposed to be open and available to everybody. Everybody, yep. And and somehow along the way, in any way, shape, or form as you are. And somehow along the way, we done perverted it into a freaking exclusive social club that you gotta be a good person to be a part of. And it's like, bro, you could that shit couldn't be more wrong. Like, that's not that's not what church is about. That's not what it is. Like, I tell people all the time, like, there's so many people I meet them, whatever, and they're like, oh yeah. Like yo, every time every time I think about like you, like in church, it's always just like, damn, like he go to like he's a church dude. Like, that's crazy. And like you like be preaching that shit or whatever. And I'm like, yeah. But my gang, like, I don't go to church because I think I'm a good person. I go to church because I know that the opposite is true. Like, I'm there because I know that I'm bad. I'm there because I know that I'm fucked up, that I'm a fucking bad person, that I'm a fucking mess waiting to happen. So I'm there. Not because I think I'm a great fucking guy. I'm there because I'm like, yo, if I'm not here, like I don't, I don't know how shit is gonna go for me. Like, and it's not because I'm there because I'm like, no, I gotta be here because you know, the priest, the priest is gonna save me. Like, fuck no. The priest is a nigga just like me. He has sufferings, he has problems in his life. He is a fucking sinner. He makes mistakes. You believe that? Oh, yeah, but he makes mistakes. No, not the priest. He's so holy. No, no. He makes mistakes just like me. He got problems, just like me. So I'm not going there because he's gonna save me. He's not gonna save me. He's there doing his job because he's trying to get saved too. There's no person, there's no man or woman in that building that I'm like, I'm here because this person's gonna save me. No, I'm there because God is gonna save me. And when I'm there, I truly feel like I'm relating with him. But I don't feel like I'm relating with him because I'm doing it through the priest or I'm doing it through the people that are there, whatever. Not that that doesn't happen sometimes, because there's for sure many moments where I'm like, okay, I'm relating to God and I'm doing it through the brothers and sisters that are with me in that moment. Or I'm relating to God, but I'm doing it through this particular sacrament that involves this priest and who's doing a service. Yes, for sure. But I would say more often than not is when I'm there, this is there's an intimacy, there's a one-on-one that I feel in this place. And that's why I'm there. And it's not because I'm, and again, I don't get that because I'm good enough to do it. Like I'm I'm I have just, you know, my sins are, you know, just small enough that I can have that experience. That's bullshit. That's fucking bullshit. And the fact that there's people out there that feel like, nah, I can't go to church because every time I go in there, like niggas judge me or whatever. Like, I've seen it all, bro. Like people with tattoos, people with too many piercings, or people that got like, you know, people that are like living with their significant other, but you know, they're not married by the church, or maybe people that got a couple kids, obviously out of wedlock or whatever, like, yo, I can't go. Why? Because they feel judged. Because they feel judged. It's like, bro, if nobody's ever told you, I'd love to be the first person to tell you there's not a motherfucker alive in a church that has the right to judge you. I don't care what you did. I don't care what you did. You could have literally just finished banging somebody on the way to the freaking thing. Nobody in there has a right to judge you. Nobody in there. Nobody in there is better than you. Nobody in, nobody in there. I don't care what they look like, what they sound like, how they present themselves to people, that is that's bullshit, gang. Like, no, that's not what it is. And it's that's I say it saddens me because I'm like, yo, I know a lot of people that I'm like, I feel like yo, they would, they would like, you know, fuck with like going to church and you know, having a relationship with God and all that, but what messes it up for them is not even God, it's the people. It's always it's the people. It's the people is what fucks it up. Like that shit is nuts to me, bro. Like, it's just like it shouldn't, it shouldn't be that way. It shouldn't. Obviously, you know, it there's that's a utopian mindset thinking that like one day we can get to a place where not, it's always gonna be like that. And God allows it. So it's always gonna be like that.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:35

It's because like some people are just naturally like pretentious and classist, but the problem is is that they don't have the necessary like education, they don't have the knowledge, they don't have the success, they don't have the actual riches to be that way. But then they go to church and they realize, like, oh well shit, I'm going to church for 30 years. So I can act like I am someone better than I actually am, and I can treat someone differently because oh, I've been going to church for 30 years. Like that's that's like their currency in their head. Like, you know, like oh, I've been doing this, like I'm a I'm a good person. And and it's just like that's what it is. Like the same way, like some people with money use the fact that they have more money than others to make people feel less than. Yeah. Some people in church use the fact that they're in church to make people that don't go to church feel less than. And it's just like they it's crazy. It's like the it's like the opposite, but I know that it's an actual thing that goes on because there's a lot of people that say that they've stopped going to church over their experiences with people in the church. With people, and and people that don't church, they don't be God.

SPEAKER_05 1:10:47

God is not those people.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:49

And people have like that like this like preconceived notion that everybody that goes to church is like they think that they're better than everyone and whatever. And it's just like there's just there's just like such a misconception because it's just like the truth is is that we're not we're not better. What I would say is that that the one thing that people who don't necessarily go to church know is that the people in church are probably worse than you, and they're probably worse than you because they know better than what they do, and do the same shit that you do, and you don't, yeah. Because when you're or you might not, yeah. Like when you're in, like when you're in a relationship or whatever and you're living in the world, the world tells you get in a relationship, fornicate, like have sex, like that's a normal thing. Facts when you're in church, that is very discouraged. People in church still do that. The difference is with the people out of church.

SPEAKER_05 1:11:46

That's why that's what I'm saying. Like, yeah, that's why, like, what would I look like judging somebody? Like somebody comes to the church and they like they're not married and they got a couple kids and they living with their significant other. Imagine me looking at that person saying, Oh, I mean, look at this guy. I mean, this guy's he lives with this woman and they have children or whatever. Man, you know how crazy I was like, what who am I to look at that person? Like, bro, and not only did I do it, but bro, fuck the fact that I did it, I did it. But the the key is that I did it. And God forgave me. God till this day forgives me for every fuck up, every mistake, every shortcoming, every fucking error in my ways, he forgives me. Because at the end of the day, he made me. He knows that I'm fucking weak, that I'm gonna fuck this up, that up, that he knows, he knows, he knows. My decision that I have to make is do I want to accept that forgiveness or not? That's what it is, that's all it is. So going to a place and having people think that they can look at you and think like, no, I'm gonna judge this person because what gang? No, no, it don't, it it ain't, it's not, that's not what it's about. That's not what it's about. And the thing is looking at people thinking like it's a kind of currency, that just tells me, like, yo, y'all don't like y'all might have been in the church 30 years, like but you don't know what you you're not listening. It's like not listening.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:06

Like faith currency.

SPEAKER_05 1:13:08

No, it's I believe you, and I I know it's true. I know it's true. I've seen it.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:11

Nigga, Momo used to talk about it all the time, bro. The moralists, the people who just like, they just think that, like, oh my god, and oh, why why do you listen to this music? Why do you do this? Why do you do that? Because they feel like, no, we we go to church, we have to be, we have to be buttoned up. No, and God bless, God bless you. God bless the people, you know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_05 1:13:31

God bless the people that are like, you know, I don't, I don't listen to this music because you know, like, no, you know, I know it's not good and whatever for you. God bless you. God bless you. God bless. I listen to the music that I like. God forgive me if he thinks it's wrong. But I listen to the music that I like. It's a it's a form of entertainment for me. I don't live my life according to that music. Um, if you bring up the point that you believe that some people can be influenced and pushed to do things based off of that music or live, that it's it's a very real point and it's a valid point. I understand that, which is why I am careful about some of the things that I put in front of my kids who are still impressionable. But I'm gonna call a spade a spade. At my ripe age of 34, if I go out tomorrow and do something, I'm not blaming it on a fucking song or a fucking movie or a fucking reel that I saw on IG. Fuck no. If I go out and did this because I wanted to do it, and that's it. I think people live too much of their life looking for excuses as to why they did this and why they did that. Bro, you did that because you wanted to, bro.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:31

They everybody wants to have something to blame. And and my shit is looking people don't want to be accountable for their decisions. Everything is the music, the schools, the movies, the the society in general. Especially parents. Like, I hate to hear that from a parent, like, oh yeah, you know, because he's been watching, he's been watching this now, and all of a sudden now he's violent. Nigga, no, your kid is violent. Nigga might have nigga might be fucking a mental case or something.

SPEAKER_05 1:14:57

Like or also just be real about like what's in your children. Yeah, like you know what I mean.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:03

Like if one of my kids Or he probably seen you beat the shit out of your fucking husband.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:08

Also, too. So I'm saying, like, look, if one of my kids come one day and do some shit that I'm like, what the hell? Like, this dude just started crashing out or whatever, like that. You think I'm gonna be surprised? I am a crash out.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:20

Exactly.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:21

These children have my DNA running in them. So if one of them comes out to be a crash out, I'm not gonna blame the tablet. I'm not gonna blame YouTube. I'm not gonna blame Netflix. I'm gonna blame me. Because I am a crasho.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:36

Which one of your kids do you think is most likely to become a crash out? Probably Aria.

SPEAKER_05 1:15:41

She the most, I would say she the most like me. Because she's the most on 10 at all times. Is that how she got the energy? Good or bad. She got that she's got a big energy be a lot too. Like Aria, Arya's pops up. I'm giving nothing but energy. That's Aria. Everywhere, everywhere she goes, she's giving nothing but energy, gang. She don't care. Like, and she's just unapologetically herself, which also really reminds me of me. Like, she don't care. Like, she is who she is. Like, and I also see like a lot of talent, you know. I mean, obviously, like her, Claudia for sure. Like, they like very they they're very gifted. Um, and they're not afraid to like just be who they fucking are. But bro, I'll tell you like this: the one thing that like really puts that all into perspective to me is the gospel itself. Because like for people to, you know, be in the church or be around the church or be faith-based people and feel like they're better and and live that way, I'm like, listen, man, that's cool. Do you, but remember that there is a verse in the Bible, in your Bible, that is in your home right now. That same Bible that you probably ain't opened, right? I mean, you might post a quote or two on Instagram every now and again, but you know that good book that's in your heart, you ain't open that shit in months. And that's cool. I ain't I ain't here to judge you. I ain't here to judge you on that. You know what I'm saying? I ain't tripping. That ain't that don't got nothing to do with me. I am. I'm just saying. I'm just saying. Open that, open that book up and uh check out that verse that says that there's gonna be prostitutes and murderers and all types of shit that are gonna get into heaven before you, and then ask yourself why that is. Because that that's something that stays with me. You know what I'm saying? That is something that stays with me. That gospel when Jesus is literally saying, like, yo, there's gonna be people that's like, Lord, Lord, but I was preaching in your name. Like, that that, yo, why do people like people gloss over? Why do you think that's in the Bible? Because he knew where this shit was gonna go. He knew that there was gonna come a time where there was gonna be people in the church that were gonna feel holier than thou and be like, I'm better than this people because I go to church every week and I give this much money and I'm this kind of way and I'm that kind of way, but they judge everybody else who's not like that. And he says, in truth, I tell you, you're gonna get to the gates of heaven, and I'm gonna be like, yo, I don't know who you are. And you're gonna be like, What? Nigga, I was in the I was in the streets, I was like, yo, Jesus, God loved me. I was preaching, I was catechizing, I was, I was singing, I was doing everything. Yo, I gave mad money. Yo, I was helping, I helped out that priest, he needed help. I went, I did this, I did that, I did whatever. And he's like, Yeah, but you judged. You judged. You was Aaron Judge on that motherfucker, and so because of that, I don't know you because I don't judge people like you do. It's like that that shit right there, that verse, that one passage right there. I'm telling you, that is the number one passage in the entire Bible. That shit lives rent-free in my mind all the time.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:26

Because that shit, bro, niggas be performative, bro. Like that, that that's what it is. Niggas be performative. And I I remember like one of my favorite, I don't even remember if it's a gospel or whatever, is like a path. I I think it is a gospel. And they read it, they this year they read it in the beginning of the of Lent. So it was Ash Wednesday, where uh I don't know if I don't know who's saying it, but he's saying like don't be like the Pharisees and just like you know, like don't like if you're gonna fast, fast. But if you're gonna give if you're gonna give alms, if you're gonna give alms, give alms. But basically, my interpretation of it, because y'all know how I am. My interpretation is if you're gonna do what you're supposed to do for your faith, you do it and you shut the fuck up. You don't do it, and then like I don't fast and then come to C's crib and say, Yo, bro, my stomach touching my back. Yo, you know, bro, I've been fasting since the beginning of Lent, bro. Exactly. No me. Yo, remember, I haven't been doing this. Yup.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:30

Because P and Or it's like, yo, yeah, bro, like I'm broke right now. Yeah, because you know I just ran into some dude that hit him with like$500.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:38

It's like, yo, and I and when I say it's performative, I'm not saying that, like, I'm not trying to take away from whatever act that y'all think y'all are doing. What I'm saying is you're not taking away from it.

SPEAKER_05 1:19:50

In reality, yo, that's that's how people see it, though. In the Bible, though. Like, you're not taking away from it. I'm not taking away from it. Jesus said it, my God. He said it. In truth, I tell you, they have received their reward. You don't believe me? Go to Matthew, Matthew, chapters four, five, six. Right, go Sermon on the Mount. Just go look, read that up. Read that up right there. That's when he's saying This nigga got the Sermon on the Mount queued up in his fucking head.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:14

That's don't if that ain't a catechist. Gang. This nigga been to like 14 formation conveniences. Bro, man.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:21

Yeah, it's more, it's more than that at this point. I was trying to do the number the other day. I was trying to do the number of the day, and I got I got over 20. I was trying to say, I was like, how many formation conventions have I done? Whatever. I was trying, it was over 20. But gang, like that's one of my favorite passages in all the Bible. That's one of my favorite passages in all the Bible. That's one, it's one of my favorite ones.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:40

If you ever know, need to know how you need to move as someone exactly.

SPEAKER_05 1:20:44

That's it right there. Exactly. So if you ever went to the church and you felt like, nah, these niggas was judging me, that shit ain't right, or whatever. If you want proof that it wasn't right, go to the Bible with a matter of chapter four and just start reading. Four, chapter five, how to answer reading.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:59

Just let your yes, mean yes, let no, mean no. Anything else in there.

SPEAKER_05 1:21:05

The Lord's prayer, the Lord's prayer, the our father that we say comes from there. It's all in there. Gang. And he says it there. He's like, these like, don't be like them that they fast and they make their appearance look disfigured and whatever. And he's like, in truth, I tell you, they have received their reward. Or don't be like the ones that have a trumpet go before them before they give alms and they do this or whatever. In truth, I tell you, they have received the reward. What does he mean by that? Exactly what we're talking about here. Why do niggas do that shit? Like, oh yeah, bro, because you know I've been fat, or you know, I've been giving out this money, or you know I've been doing because they want people to look at them and be like, oh damn, yo, this nigga's, you know what I'm saying? Like, this nigga holy, go, bro. Like, this nigga holy. Like, yo, look, he's yo, he's fasting crazy, bro. Like, we only supposed to fast one meal. Yo, this nigga been fasting for seven days. Like, this nigga holy. Because yo, bro, we and like, yo, we gotta give arms, yo. He gave a thousand dollars to this homeless person. Like, he recorded or he posted that shit on IG, whatever. It's like, like that, when he says, in truth, I tell you, they have received their reward, their reward is us thinking those thoughts, like, oh my god, like yo, that person's holier than me, whatever. And that's Jesus telling us straight to our face, like, yo, that's that ain't what it's for. This, yeah, this is that ain't what it's for. He says, Go this don't mean nothing up there. He says, Go to go to your secret room. Go to your secret room. And that's not a secret room that you have in your house. That's not the meaning behind that. Go into your secret room. That means go into the secret room in you, in your soul. In your soul. When he speaks about the room, when he speaks about that that place, it's not a physical place. It's not your it's not your bedroom, it's not your your man cave, it's not your whatever. No, no, no, no. It's your soul. When you do these things, you do it, you do this shit and you share it with your soul. Like, listen, there's you know, there's things that I've done that become public and I don't like it. Like, and that, and and because when it happens, I'm like, okay, that's how I know I did it wrong. Because if people know about it and people talk about it, then I'm like, I ain't getting the graces from that. Because niggas know, and because niggas know, they probably had thoughts about, oh wow, look, he did this or whatever. And it's like that was I that was a reward that I got, but it wasn't the reward that I that that you needed for that. That's why there's you know, there's a myriad of other things, and there's there's more things that I want to do and that I hope to accomplish and and and you know, really make happen through the grace of God, that nobody knows. And maybe we'll never know. And that's fine. Like, people know me. I think people, the people who like spend the most time with me and have grown up with me and stuff, whatever, niggas know like, oh, you know, he's this nigga, he a generous nigga, he a nice nigga. Like, yeah, cool. Like, niggas could know that. There's nothing wrong with that. But like, just how far that generosity goes or just how much or whatever, no.

SPEAKER_03 1:23:51

No.

SPEAKER_05 1:23:52

And niggas don't have to know that. You know what I mean? And if and if I go my whole life, the less people that realize any of this stuff, the better. You know what I'm saying? Like, that, and I'm trying to really get good about that now. Like, just really get good about that now. Keep shit, play shit close to the vest, you know, do this, do that. Like, just really do that. Because at the end of the day, it's like, I don't, I don't want the glory, I don't want the glory from from people here. I'm trying to get myself right so that I can be good when I'm out of here. Like, one of my favorite memes on social media is like, yo, the Bible, bro, you know what, you know what the Bible stands for, right? Basic instructions before leaving earth. B-I-B-L-E. And it's like, bro, it's a joke, it's whatever, it's a nice meme. It's funny, but I'm like, yo, I'm literally treating my walk. I'm literally treating my walk in the community, my walk in the faith and all that like that. Like, at the end of the day, bro, this is for me to get my shit right before I'm out of here. So at the end of the day, like what somebody else might think about how I'm moving, what I'm doing, the way I'm doing it, it doesn't matter. And I think that's why like I've become more free over the last two, two to three years, I would say. I've been through a lot, I've been through life-changing things. Um, you know, we spoke about it here, you know, like I said, I lost my daughter, but there's more than that. Like, there's a lot of things that I've been through, whatever, that have really shaped me. Like I've gone through things like in the church, in the community and stuff like that, or whatever, that's put a lot of different things into perspective. And I'm just at a point now where I'm like, yo, I gotta, I gotta, I gotta just be me, bro. I just gotta be me. I just gotta be me. I feel like I spent a very long time trying to like fit a mold or do just be a way that would like like get me what I wanted out of my relationship with God and out of what I do in the church. And it's like, bro, that's that's not the way to go about it. It's not the way to go about it. At the end of the day, bro, God made me the way that I am, and he made me that way so that I could be true to myself. And at the end of the day, if being true to myself gets people to judge me, gets people to hate on me, gets people to talk shit about me behind my back, that's not that yo, that's not my prerogative. Yeah, it's not on you. That's not on me, and there's nothing I could do about it. At the end of the day, they're gonna talk today, they're gonna talk tomorrow, no matter what I do.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:07

So because there's not enough, there's not enough people in the world that know that when you're talking about somebody or judging somebody, you're actually the problem. And I think that's what it circles back to when we talk about the issue with people in church, making people who don't go to church feel uncomfortable about going to church, is that the people in church don't realize that when they judge others inside the church, yeah, they're the bigger problem is them. It's not what that person is coming into church doing, it's not that that person is a murderer and walking into the church, it's just that you are acting like you can gatekeep the father's house. That's exactly that's the bigger problem. That's a good point. And a lot of people don't realize like your judging is worse because that person could have been saved, and you're acting like it's up to you. Like you're acting like you have a say in whether they should be here or not. And we and at the end of the day, we we we don't. And I'm not gonna lie and act like I don't judge niggas, or I don't have my thoughts about niggas. Hell yeah, but at the end of the day, I'm not gonna make a nigga feel uncomfortable because anybody who's heard my experience knows that shit. Why why should I be in church? If that's if if it's only for the good, why am I there? I don't deserve to be there.

SPEAKER_05 1:27:25

And that's the point right there, nigga. I'm gonna tell you straight up like this. If church was only for good people, I'm gonna tell you two niggas you would never see in that bitch. The two niggas you see here. Telling you that right now, gang. If it was only for the goody goodies, the people that whatever that if that was the case for real, you would never see us in there, gang.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:45

Nigga, we done bonded over how bad we were. And back in the day, like, oh man, look at the shit we used to do, man.

SPEAKER_05 1:27:53

Straight up, straight up. And I'm there, and like I said before, like, like, don't let that point fly over your head, like, gang. I'm there because I truly feel forgiven. Not by men. You know what I'm saying? Not by, not by a priest. Not by a priest. I'm not there because a priest, you know, I went to confession one day and he absolved me and it was like, oh my God, yo, that God forgave me, man. That guy forgave me. Let me stay in the church. Thank you, Father. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm not there because the people in the church made me feel forgiven by like being, oh, don't worry, it's okay. Like, what? No, no, no, no. I'm there because I feel forgiven by God Himself. And I don't attribute that to any other living, breathing person on this planet. I attribute that to the God that I believe is in heaven orchestrating all of this shit. And that's why I go. I don't go for the people. The people I mean, the people are sometimes a bonus or an obstacle. It just depends on the day. For me, honestly, it depends on the day. Some days I go, these motherfuckers is obstacles. I'm like, I can't. I'm sick of this nigga. I'm sick of this chick. I'm sick of this dude. I'm sick of everybody. And then some days I go, everybody's an obstacle, but I stay anyway. Because I'm just trying to, you know what I'm saying? I'm just trying to relate, I'm just trying to relate to God. That's it. And it happens anyway. In spite of all the obstacles, it happens anyway. And some days I go and I'm like, I don't know, man. I'm not really feeling whatever. And the people there, they're not an obstacle. They're a bonus. I'm like, damn, man. Like, look, look at this person, man. This dude is real solid. Like, he's a good ass dude, like helping me, whatever, like that. Like this woman, like, yo, she really cares about me and whatever. Like, that's that's really sometimes they're a bonus. It's a fact. But whether they're a bonus or an obstacle, ain't the reason I'm there, bro. Ain't the reason I'm there. Straight up. G-O-D, hold it down. I'm telling you. That's it right there.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:47

So we could we can wrap it up, man.

SPEAKER_05 1:29:51

I know uh, I mean, it's gonna be a shorter one, but it's good. It's good. Every now and then thought a little shorter one out there. It's cool.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:57

Nah, facts, bro. We gotta wrap it up. Yeah, we wrap it up. Rose's gonna come in here with a crowbar.

SPEAKER_05 1:30:02

Yeah, nah, nah, nah. We ain't trying to have that happen. So um, this has been episode 26. Um, shouts out to Momo. He's still on paternity. I don't know if I said that on this one or the one that got cut off. Um, and you know, G was very, very, very sick, and then also his daughter got sick tonight too. So, you know, prayers up for both of them. I hope they, you know, recover and feel better soon. So that's why it's only the two of us today, but we figured we'd still link up, drop the episode, because obviously, this is what we're doing, man. You gotta stay consistent. It sticks to the point from before, man, at the end of the day. Just 27 episodes in. We got we don't expect anything from anybody. We can't expect anything from anybody right now. We just gotta do the work. We just gotta do the work, we gotta put the time in. And sometimes putting the time in is just gonna be it's gonna be two or just three. Or it doesn't so it is what it is. We here. Um, Pasha, we'll be back, man. We'll be back next week. And um, yeah, I'll holla. I'll holla.