How to Talk About Money Without Stress or Conflict (A Guide For Aspiring Investors)

Money controls where you live, how you invest, and the wealth you build for your family.

Yet most Australians would rather talk about politics, health, and even their love life - before they'll share anything about their financial situation.

In this episode, we reveal exactly why Australians have such a complex relationship with money, why financial literacy is still so low, and what you can do to change your money mindset - to help create long-term wealth through smarter investing.

If you've ever felt unsure about property investing, confused about debt, or uncomfortable discussing money with your partner, this is a conversation you need to hear.

Tune in to discover:

✅ Why Australia's tall poppy syndrome keeps people financially stuck
✅ How childhood money memories shape every financial decision you make as an adult
✅ The gap in the education system leaving most Australians financially illiterate
✅ Why money avoidance in relationships starts small… but compounds fast
✅ The mindset shift from scarcity to abundance (this separates wealth builders from everyone else)
✅ How to build a "money team" of professionals who accelerate your investing journey
✅ Simple ways to normalize money conversations with your partner and kids starting today

Key Moments:

00:00:00 Intro
00:01:00 Money Runs Everything
00:02:20 Why Australians Won't Talk About Money
00:03:40 How Childhood Shapes Your Money Beliefs
00:05:20 Schools & Money
00:07:20 First Exposure to Investing
00:10:00 Normalizing Money Conversations
00:11:00 Money and Relationships
00:11:40 Scarcity vs. Abundance Mindset
00:12:20 Build Your Money Team
00:13:40 The No BS Takeaway

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https://www.ripehouseadvisory.com.au/lp/25/09/pd/top-performing-suburbs-report-2025

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https://www.ripehouseadvisory.com.au/lp/24/8/investment-lending-sign-up

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✅About Ripehouse Advisory✅

Through their innovative ‘done for you’ property investment system, Ripehouse Advisory simplifies the investment process - enabling investors to build a property portfolio that generates substantial returns.

With a focus on long-term relationships, personalised strategies, and thorough research, Ripehouse Advisory empowers investors to create a financial legacy that can be passed on to future generations.

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✅Contact Ripehouse Advisory✅

https://www.ripehouseadvisory.com.au/

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

For most people out there, money is typically a starting point of conflict, right? Like if you think of it, mum and dad, they're having a fight about money, whether it's there's not enough of it or what to do with it.

SPEAKER_00 0:12

Money has been associated with status and comparison and those sorts of things, and we don't like to talk about that, or we don't want to be seen to be doing well, and we don't want to be seen to be doing poorly as well.

SPEAKER_01 0:24

They'll talk about the political issues, they'll talk about their partners, their health. But when someone asks someone what they earn, ask them what they paid for their house, ask them what interest rate they're on, and suddenly the room goes quiet. It's almost like some kind of secret society where everyone knows money matters, but nobody's allowed to talk about it. We spend over a decade in school learning math, science, English, all these things, but and I'm sorry to any of my teachers, maybe who might be listening, it doesn't really relate to real-world money problems. I think the people that will do well in that money space are the ones that have a bit more of an money is one of the most powerful forces in our lives. It influences where we live, how we raise our families, the opportunities available to us, and ultimately the lifestyle we're able to create. And yet, for something so central to everyday life, we seem strangely uncomfortable talking about it. Think about it for a second. They'll talk about the political issues, they'll talk about their partners, they'll talk about their health. But when someone asks someone what they earn, ask them what they paid for their house, ask them what interest rate they're on, and suddenly the room goes quiet. It's almost like some kind of secret society where everyone knows money matters, but nobody's allowed to talk about it. My name's Julian Nicolitis, head of strategy at Ripehouse Advisory, national buyers agent for discerning property investors, and joining me today is our very special guest, not Mark Davis for a change, but our general manager at Ripehouse Advisory, Ian Dowson. Ian's typically running the day-to-day behind the scenes at Ripehouse. However, he's also an experienced property investor himself with over two decades in the property space. Dauso, welcome back. And today we're talking about money, not just about how to make it, but why the conversation around is still so strangely taboo and why improving financial literacy starts with simply being willing to talk about it. Dauso, what's your thoughts on that?

SPEAKER_00 2:38

Yeah, it's interesting, isn't it? I I don't know if it's a um coming from a monarchial uh construct in Australia where you know we're descendants from the UK, you've got the the king and the queen, and I guess there's maybe always been a bit of a anti-establishment style of rhetoric that we've grown up with that money has been associated with status and comparison and those sorts of things, and we don't like to talk about that, or we don't want to be seen to be doing well, and we don't want to be seen to be doing poorly as well. So I don't know if that's where it comes. Like I think most people are comfortable to be in the middle uh when it comes to those two extremes. They uh and we have that really tall poppy. It's an interesting thing because you almost get the sense that in America it doesn't feel like that. You know, like it's uh it's it seems cool to promote that you're doing well and that you're being successful and all that sort of stuff. So yeah, I don't know if it ties back to that sort of uh entrenched monarchy uh style heritage that most of us have that makes us not want to talk about it.

SPEAKER_01 3:44

Aaron Powell Yeah, it's funny you say that, Ian. I think you're right, kind of like the the old monarchy in terms of being very modest and private probably does shape that a little bit. I guess I can a question for you a lot of our attitudes towards money are actually shaped very early in life. What are your thoughts on that?

SPEAKER_00 3:59

Yeah, I I agree. I I think that's very true. I mean, if you think back to your own childhood and you think how has that shaped your thoughts around money, around investing, et cetera. I think, and we'll probably to get into it a little bit, but uh the schooling system, I don't think, really addresses money at all. You spend a lot of time learning about numbers, but uh you don't really learn about money per se. So I think all of those things impact uh how you feel about money as an adult for sure. And you know, you mentioned struggle, you mentioned uh secrecy. I guess if and as parents now, I guess we have a responsibility with our kids to try and normalize that conversation as we move forward, and it's definitely something that I try and do in a positive light with my kids.

SPEAKER_01 4:44

Yeah, I think for for most people out there, money is typically a a starting point of conflict, right? Like if you think of it, you know, mum and dad, they're having a fight about money, whether it's there's not enough of it or or what to do with it. I think that's a very, very common one. Or, you know, a bill, you think about it, a bill pops up, a maintenance item pops up, car breaks down, it's almost like there's this always negative concept around money. And people in general, they don't like conflict, right? So whether it's at work or or in sport or whatever it might be, it's easier to just put the blinkers on and avoid it. So I think very early on, when all we're experiencing is negative connotations or it leads to an argument or a fight or whatever it might be, it it starts to have a bit of a uh a negative shape around it. Now, I guess another interesting piece you touched on there, Ann, and uh we'll get onto a bit more, is around education. You know, we spend over a decade in school learning math, science, English, all these things, but really none of it, and I'm sorry to any of my teachers maybe who might be listening, it doesn't really relate to real-world money problems.

SPEAKER_00 5:53

What are your thoughts? Yeah, no, I think that's true, 100%. You know, like and I don't know if things have changed, Jules, it's a while since I've been at school. But um but I remember growing up, we we didn't have any. I think I had one class in year nine that um spoke about the share market and and all that, and I found that really interesting, actually. But yeah, uh unless you get into uh university and do a a business or accounting degree, you're probably really not getting into the weeds of what business PLs might look like or, you know, revenue and costs and what's EBITDA and these sorts of things. And I think they're important principles for people to apply uh to their own lives. You're running your own personal PL. And I don't think there's a lot of education that sits within the school framework that actually addresses that. Now, I could be wrong, that may have changed considerably since I was school, but I don't believe that's the case.

SPEAKER_01 6:41

I've got two boys, one's in primary school, one's in high school, and I've not seen really anything. But that probably differs to it still being the case. I think the only thing that I can rem recall from school growing up that was maybe had some real-world application was how to do a resume. I do remember doing one of those. But um, yeah, in terms of doing budgeting, whether it be weekly, monthly, or yearly, I still think, you know, and I get to sp to speak with a lot of clients each and every day. There's very little financial literacy around that. Typically speaking, if there are, is somebody who's all over it. I guess to your kind of point, they're they've normally like got some kind of finance position that they work they work in currently, so they've probably learnt that along the way. They don't understand taxes, investing, running a business. So I think there's a big gap there that that's why that exists. So I guess Dowso, so off the back of that, we'll go into the next question. So I guess, you know, we've we basically talked most people don't know about money, but then they get introduced to investing, uh, which again I don't think a lot of people get it much exposure to that unless they self-seek it through through their own research or or push down that pathway from you know family or or mentors. What are your thoughts around that? If you're serious about building wealth through property, you don't just need a loan, you need a strategy. And that's exactly what the Australian Lending and Investment Centre delivers. Australia's most awarded brokerage. They're not just looking at what you can borrow, they'll build you a holistic lending plan tailored to your long-term goals. We use them, we trust them, and so do our clients. So to find out more or to book your complimentary lending strategy session, head to the link in the show notes to connect with the team. Thanks for listening. Now back to the video.

SPEAKER_00 8:23

Yeah, for sure. You know, and then we start hearing uh things like, you know, leverage and understanding interest rates, what's the difference between interest only and principal and interest? Why should I pay one and not the other, depending on what type of um asset I'm buying, whether it's investment or a principal place of residence, you know, loan structuring, you know, what's an appreciating asset versus a depreciating asset, et cetera. What's compound growth? How does that work in my favor? How does it work against me from uh an inflationary point of view? So yeah, these are the things that potentially, based on people's upbringing, are potentially lacking uh later in life. And it it can stunt your investment journey. Because if they're concepts that you don't really understand, you you're probably only finding yourself in that space once you've been dragged there accidentally. Or like you say, you've the the people have been fortunate that they've had people that have sort of pushed them in in that direction. So yeah, it it it is a it is a bit of a challenge, but it's never too late uh to get involved.

SPEAKER_01 9:20

It's a good point you make, because I mean, again, not to relate this back to myself, but I deal with people each and every day, multiple times a day, and we are talking about these things which to me seem just like it's it's water off a duck's back. Like of course I know what, you know, interest only and principal and interest and in my interest rate and L VR positions, which they're not really hard to learn at all. But people just aren't familiar with the concept or the or the impacts they can have. They're not, I guess, familiar with uh, you know, what is it costing you before tax, after tax. So these kind of things where they're not able, because they don't know, yeah, they're not able to kind of really compare the pair equally. So I think that's where there's a big gap. But I guess one of the things we talk about often is about importance of normalizing these conversations, I guess from your side, Ian, like what does that look like?

SPEAKER_00 10:08

Yeah. I think it's important to be having these conversations with your partner, be having these conversations with your close mates and and starting to open up this. So, you know, what interest rate are you on? You know, like, oh, if you don't mind me asking, what loan did you take out for this? But like open up these conversations, and I'm sure you'll find people are willing to talk, but uh but I I think there is a point there that um you gotta have the conversation, uh start having them because they're really important. Start having them with your kids so that when they get to this uh the same point, um that it's a lot more comfortable for them. They're they're used to it.

SPEAKER_01 10:40

Yeah, I think you know the data out there is really conclusive on this as well, that a lot of conflicts in relationships stem from money, right? And I think the sooner you can have those healthy conversations and you know, whether it's a shared account, setting budgets between you both and starting investing, not impacting lifestyle, just finding out things that are going to work for you both. Because otherwise what ends up happening is people put the blinkers on, they avoid the conflict, and then all of a sudden a a small little thing turns into, you know, relationship defining or breaking at some point. So I think that's super important. And yeah, you know, touching on, you know, I've got a couple of boys as well, and constantly talking to them about saving, uh uh investing, what that looks like, why you would invest. Dad's running a couple of businesses, the work involved that's in that and the money that's involved with that. And they don't need to know all the finer details, but normalizing it where it's like it's not a negative, I guess to your point, is like turn this off where most people it's about money is a negative thing, where you can have a bit more of an abundance mindset. I think the people that will do well in that money space are the ones that have a bit more of an abundance mindset. Like, how can I make more money? What can I do? How can I make sure that it's no longer a point of conflict for ourselves? What are the things we need to tick along the way where we reward ourselves for doing the right behaviors as well, whether it's a holiday, whether it's a splurge on a gift. So I think that's a a big important one for people as well. And I guess the last one for today, Dowso, I guess another key element when it comes to money is you're surrounding yourself with the right people. Um, we'll call it your money team. Yeah. What does that look like? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:20

Mark speaks about it all the time, doesn't he? You know, it's it's having your alignment with your buyer's agent, with your your broker, uh, your investment lending broker, uh, making sure that your financial advisor, making sure your accountant, that you're all speaking the same language and that you're speaking with like-minded people and and try and find people in your network that are like-minded as well. You know, people that are going down that journey. You know, if you start having those conversations within your peer group or within your work group or what have you, you'll you'll find someone that's going down a similar path. So I would just say surround yourself with like-minded individuals, surround yourself with the right team, and um and that's you're gonna find that's those conversations a lot easier.

SPEAKER_01 12:59

Yeah, I think you know, you want to get good at anything, at anything. You you get yourself a coach, right? You get yourself a mentor. Like I I'm talking with my broker or accountant, you know, every month or so, right? And now it doesn't need to be to that level, and I've got a few different things which are juggling, which most people don't need to be doing. But I think for the average person out there, like if you should be making sure you set time aside, whether it be every three or six months, have these conversations. Sometimes you might not need to change anything. Sometimes you might need to make some some changes because all if you're not doing it frequently, all of a sudden six months becomes a year, a year becomes five, five becomes ten, and and nothing really moves for you. So I think for anybody listening out there, I guess regarding that question there, your team is there to help you. For a lot of people, I think also too, money becomes a burden because they just see it as they don't know or it requires time. But there are plenty of professions out there that can help you in that uh that money space as well. So the no BS takeaway is this money influences almost every aspect of our lives, and yet culturally, we've developed this strange reluctance to even talk about it. But financial literacy improves when conversations become normal. Understanding income, debt, leverage, assets, and compounding isn't something people are simply born knowing. It's something that develops through education, experience, and open discussion. And often the fastest way to improve your understanding is by surrounding yourself with people who are willing to talk about it openly. If you want clarity on your own wealth creation position, whether that's borrowing capacity, property strategy, or building a long-term property plan, you can book a strategy call with either myself or Mark via the links in the show notes. We'll tell you straight where you stand and help you start having the right conversations about money. And as always, thanks for listening and we'll catch you on the next podcast. Bye for now.