Good Neighbor Podcast: Orange County

How A Former Police Officer Helps Couples And First Responders Heal

• Rachel Fyffe & Brian Whitley

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What if therapy felt less like venting and more like progress you can measure? We sit down with counselor and therapist Brian Whitley, a former police officer who brings a rare mix of empathy, structure, and on-the-ground experience to his private practice. Brian explains how his background in law enforcement shaped a results-focused approach that resonates with first responders, individuals facing addiction or OCD, and couples at a crossroads.

Brian walks us through his specialties and why he splits his caseload between individuals and couples. For mixed-agenda marriages where one partner is leaning out and the other wants to rebuild, he uses discernment counseling to help both sides gain clarity before committing to a path. For OCD, he relies on evidence-based methods like exposure and response prevention; for addiction, he leans on motivational interviewing and practical routines that restore stability. Throughout, he challenges a persistent myth: that therapists should only listen. Listening matters, he says, but clients deserve direction, accountability, and changes they can feel at home and at work.

We also explore how first responder culture affects mental health, from sleep disruption and hypervigilance to stigma around seeking help. Brian shares how he builds trust with police and fire professionals through confidentiality, concrete goals, and small wins that accumulate into real recovery. You’ll hear how he finds clients through search and referrals, why fit with a therapist is crucial, and how a free consultation can clarify next steps. Off the clock, Brian recharges by the ocean and on the slopes, a reminder that balance and recovery are part of the work.

If you want therapy that blends compassion with action, Brian’s perspective offers a blueprint worth considering. Brian Whitley, Marriage and Family Therapist, inc. Visit: https://www.brianwhitley.com/ 

Listen, reflect, and decide what kind of counselor you need to move forward. If this conversation resonates, subscribe, share with a friend who might benefit, and leave a review to help others find the show.

SPEAKER_01:

This is the Good Neighbor Podcast, the place where local businesses and neighbors come together. Here's your host, Rachel Fife.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, welcome to the Good Neighbor Podcast. Now, are you in search of a therapist or a counselor? Well, that resource is closer than you think. Today I have the pleasure of introducing your good neighbor, Brian Whitley, with this who is a counselor and a therapist. Brian, how's it going? Great.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, thanks for having me on.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, we are we're really excited to learn about your practice. So tell us about your therapy and counselor practice.

SPEAKER_00:

Yeah, so I work in uh private practice as a marriage and family therapist. Um, my uh clients are divided between some 50% couples and the other 50% individuals. Um, the individual counseling that I uh provide, I have some specialties um working with addiction, uh with obsessive compulsive disorder, and also working with members of the police and fire department. Um and then the other half of my work is with couples. Uh, in that work, I'm uh working with all of the different relationship problems that a couple could present. Um, and I also use this very specific protocol uh to help clients when maybe one spouse is considering leaving the marriage and the other spouse wants to save it. So there's a uh a distinct protocol that I use for that called discernment counseling.

SPEAKER_02:

Wow. Well, how did you get into this kind of business?

SPEAKER_00:

So I grew up in the Washington, DC area and knew uh friends whose father was in different uh federal law enforcement agencies. And I always wanted I was always interested in psychology, so I wanted to do this federal enforcement and interested in in psychology. So um I out of college, I tried to get into a federal agency, uh, but they were on a hiring freeze. And so the the advice I was given is get some local law enforcement first, and then you can always come back to federal. Um, I did that, really liked local law enforcement. I was a police officer working patrol for most of my uh career. Uh the team that I landed on, I had a uh a partner get shot, and another partner had a whole bunch of bad things happen to them, and they did not have any sort of uh backup plan for what they were gonna do after law enforcement. So I wanted to get a backup plan. Um, I took one class in a uh a local master's program, really liked it. And the plan was that I would go through my master's, get my intern hours, um, and then to be able to retire when I was old enough from the police department and transition into this work. Uh that all happened just about 10 years too early. Uh about 11 years into my career, I had a shoulder injury. Uh, so I wasn't able to work anymore as a police officer and then transitioned into being a therapist.

SPEAKER_02:

Wow. Well, now what do you what do you think are some mis or misconceptions in your industry?

SPEAKER_00:

I think oftentimes people uh think of counselors and they think of them as a good listener. That if they go to a counselor, uh they're gonna be able to share their frustrations or their hurt or their disappointment, and the therapist is gonna be a good listener. And while I believe that that is important for the therapist to be compassionate and empathetic, um, I also believe it's important that clients feel like they're working towards their goals. And so instead of just being a good listener, I'm also really engaged uh with my clients, helping them identify goals and then in the sessions working towards them. And I would say for those out there who are maybe in a therapy where you're just getting good listening, there are therapists out there who are more directive.

SPEAKER_02:

Okay. Now we know marketing is really the heart of every business. So how are you finding clients for your practice?

SPEAKER_00:

So for the most part, um it's two things either um online searches that my website uh comes up when people search for different things. Um, and then referrals uh is the the other big category, whether it's um clients that I've worked with or are working with will tell people about me. Um having people that are like uh physicians or somebody who is working with a lot of the public, um, I'll get referrals from from those clinicians as well.

SPEAKER_02:

Wonderful. Now, have you ever thought about doing your own podcast? I I haven't.

SPEAKER_00:

Um it it sounds interesting, but it also sounds a little uh overwhelming to try to figure it all out and fit that into my schedule.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, I bet. I bet. Now, outside of work, what do you like to do for fun?

SPEAKER_00:

Uh I love anything ocean related. Uh so I love reading uh a good book at the beach. My wife and I will go on exercise walks down at the beach. I love tropical locations to snorkel and scuba dive. Um, and then for winter activities, I love to snowboard. So I'm always trying to get up to the mountains any chance I get. Wonderful.

SPEAKER_02:

Now, Brian, please tell our listeners one thing they should remember about Brian Whitley, counselor and therapist.

SPEAKER_00:

I think what I would want uh people to remember is that I am an option for those who want to make changes in their life and are uh ready to do that work, that I will do that direct work with my clients and be very diligent as we're working to make sure that the counseling that I'm providing is being me is meaningful for the client.

SPEAKER_02:

Wonderful. Well, how can our listeners learn more about Brian Whitley Counselor?

SPEAKER_00:

So I think the best way is through my website, and it's pretty easy. It's just my name, uh BrianWitley.com. Okay. And on the website, there's uh an opportunity to schedule a free consultation, and I'd be happy to talk about um my my practice and also hear maybe ways that I could be helpful for clients. So I invite people to reach out.

SPEAKER_02:

Wonderful. Well, Brian, I really appreciate you being on the show, and we wish you and your practice really all the success moving forward.

SPEAKER_00:

Thank you very much, Rachel. Appreciate it.

SPEAKER_01:

Thank you for listening to the Good Neighbor Podcast. To nominate your favorite local businesses to be featured on the show, go to gnpoorgecounty.com. That's gnporangecounty.com or call 714 941 2862.