EP. 17 Bold Moves & Life Integration: Naomi Eyler on What the Next Generation Wants

After graduating from university in Nigeria, Naomi Eyler made the bold move to the UAE to start her career. She joins us to unpack the mindset of the next generation: from how they define a successful career today to the leadership styles that inspire loyalty and high performance". We also dive into the reality of "life integration"—how she manages a demanding career, a new marriage, and an MBA all at once, without feeling the need to sacrifice one for the other.

Transcript

Speaker 0:00

Good morning, good afternoon, good evening, wherever you are in the world today. I'm so glad to have you here on the We Win podcast powered by Accelerate Her Africa. I am your host, Lolita Ejiofor. So today we're gonna do something really different. We're gonna talk to a young lady just to understand her journey from studying in Nigeria and moving to a foreign land and then finding love in a foreign land. And I'm sure you're gonna find this episode really interesting. Please meet my guest, Naomi Eyler. Hello, Naomi. It's so lovely to have you here with us today.

Speaker 1 0:47

Hi Lolita, thank you so much for having me. It is such an honor to be here today. I've been looking forward to this month, actually. So thank you so much for inviting me.

Speaker 0:57

Oh, awesome. Naomi, I want to start at the beginning of your professional story. After graduating from the university in Nigeria, you made the bold step to move to the UAE to start your career. Can you take us back to that decision? And what were the hopes and fears that you were carrying with you?

Speaker 1 1:22

Well, to be honest, that um decision was, I wouldn't say it was an easy decision to just pack up and go to a country where you know no one, you have no idea what the culture is all about. Um, you've made that decision based off of a couple of visits and you felt it was a good, it was a good place to start, you know, because it's so diverse and you got interested in some little girl from a tiny city decided to be in a big city where you felt, you know, the skies are your oysters, I would say. And the fact that Dubai was such a um at the time I moved there, it was such a developed country, I would say, um, really shaped my thinking. And I thought, you know what, why not? This is where I could start my career. This is I see myself um becoming a better version of me and just moving forward in life, you know. So that was why I chose UAE because of its diversity. I mean, schooling in Nigeria, you do get to see all the perks that come with um the normal school life, but um, I wasn't really exposed to um so much, you know, earlier on. So when I went to the UAE, I realized that this place would expose me and challenge me um to be a better version of me and to become that woman that I've always envisioned myself to be. So that's why I moved and that's been my journey through the UAE. But it was not an easy one. I remember my first day, you know, when I got off that plane, I was scared because I didn't I didn't know what to expect. Absolutely, I was freaking out. However, because I knew in the long run I had a vision, right? And I knew that was something that was gonna keep me going, irrespective of how of how the culture would be or what challenges that I would face. Of course, obviously everyone does, but that vision kept me going, and that's how I was able to navigate my nine years in UA. Yeah.

Speaker 3:32

Nine years, that's a long time. I know, right. And it's a very bold move. I I really admire you young people making these split decisions. I know it wasn't easy. Your career has a very clear focus on operations and project coordination, you know, the engine room of a business. Was this an intentional choice? What drew you to the craft of making things run smoothly and efficiently?

Speaker 1 4:00

Well, to be honest, I did not choose operations or project coordination. It wasn't my choice of career to begin with. However, um, I think I stumbled it on accident. I mean, I'm someone who likes to be coordinated, you know, just the small things that make a difference for me. And I realized it was after a project that I had at the time I was working with a cosmaceutical company. So we had a product launch, I would say, and I had to organize people from Spain because most of the vendors were from Spain. And I saw that project from start to finish. Now, the joy I derived from seeing the way the leaders responded, the way uh suppliers responded, it was like a memorable experience for them. And I thought, hang on a second, you are onto something here, like you know, because I just love to make things work. You know, I'm someone who I come to fix not to um add to the problem. So I would say I stumbled upon that career choice by accident, and and I, you know, decided to obviously read upon it and see how I could better use my strength to, you know, become a better version of me and in a career-wise grow. So that's how I realized there is something called appreciations coordinator or project management, and you know, use it's a field you can actually delve into, and that's how I decided to get into project management and co and project coordination.

Speaker 5:35

It's good to see that you chose to explore further by gaining qualifications as well.

unknown 5:41

Absolutely.

Speaker 1 5:42

Okay.

Speaker 5:43

All right, so your journey is an example of building a career on your own terms. Speaking from your perspective and from conversations with your peers, how would you say your generation defines a successful career today? Has the definition shifted away from the traditional corporate ladder?

Speaker 1 6:03

Well, I would say yes. As you progress in your career, you get to a certain age where you're like, you know what, this is not what I set out to do when I, you know, started this journey. And depends on where you are at that stage. I would say um you you I think like you kind of like wing it, it sounds a bit cliche, but you have to. And then being successful in your career, again, it's I think it's just a it's a term because success is different for and for everyone. And again, depends on what stage you are in your career. You might look at that stage as being successful, but then again, we are always ambitious women, right? We always want to thrive and stretch ourselves to to get more and to be more. So um, I think that that for me, I would not say um career-wise, I would I will not put it as you know, success is a stop. It's a continuation of who you are and at the stage you are in life. And I think that's what has kept me going all these years because the moment I hit a milestone, I'm like, okay, what next? Yeah, you know, I'm bored. Now what do I do? So yeah, I've just been keeping an open mind and defining success differently at every stage in my career.

Speaker 7:24

Yeah, that's very grown up, very mature way of looking at success. For the established women leaders listening, what do young professionals in your demographic look for in a leader or a manager? What kind of leadership styles inspire loyalty and high performance from your generation?

Speaker 1 7:47

That is a very tough one, Lolita. Um, no, the reason I would say that is because uh my generation usually um I say I think we drive towards a servant leader. I would say. The reason is we value loyalty, we value someone who gives honest feedback, we value someone who, you know, want to push us and see us win. So women in my, I would say women in my generation and in the stage we're in, you know, when we look up to leaders, we see people who are just pushing us to be a better version of yourself, be outspoken, be driven, and be open-minded and have fun while you're at it. Because I guess um, you know what, there's so much to do in life, and the least thing you want to do is grumble your way through it. Yeah. So yeah, that's what I would say. A woman of my age, um, this is what we thrive, and these are the kind of leaders we you know look forward to. Someone who really, really is um, I wouldn't say hold our hands or just teach us how to fish, and we will get there.

Speaker 8:58

Yeah, 100%. I prefer the servant leadership style myself. Okay, so there's a lot of talk about purpose-driven work. In your observation, how important is it for a company's mission to align with the personal values of young professionals today? Is it a nice to have or has it become a deal breaker?

Speaker 1 9:22

Um, I would say deal breaker is a strong word, but it it is nice to have. Now, the reason is um you whatever it is, whether you do nine to five or you're a content creator or whatever you choose to be, I would say it's important that that vision of that company aligns with your personal values because this is where you spend most of your life. I kid you not, this is where you spend most of your time. This is a place that it will change and shape how you see the world and you know how you think, what you do, and how you want to move forward in life. So it is very important that such an organization aligns with your value. And another thing I would say is don't lose yourself while you're it. If it doesn't align with what you actually expect to, take the best out of it and walk away, right? But don't ever lose yourself while you're in an organization all in the name of because I need money. Money should never be the driving factor if you want to progress in your career or you want to become, you know, someone who is a leader tomorrow. I would say never put money first. I mean, of course, it's very important. However, an organization who does not share the same passion as you do, who is not who will drag you down and drain you, it's not a place you want to spend six, seven years, you know, of your life trying to build yourself.

Speaker 10:45

I would say it's even tough for anybody to walk away from money for the sake of purpose. It's it's a really tough one, and for you to recognize that now shows you know exactly the sort of person that you are. So that's a great asset to have. But what do you think it takes to walk away? Because fear would stop a lot of people from making that decision.

Speaker 1 11:08

Well, fear cripples all of us. I mean, that is our biggest enemy in life. And if you're too scared to take risks, then you're not leaving. This is how I see it. You can't be too scared to take risks, especially as a woman who, you know, you have vision, you have goals, you you want to you want you have people who are looking up to you. You want to be a leader someday. You can't be scared of taking risks. And again, walking away is never easy. Of course, it's easier said than done, but in actual reality, it's not easy to walk away. But if you look at yourself, you get to a stage where you reflect and you you tend to ask yourself certain questions like, where am I? Like if you see yourself drowning in the things that you would never be comfortable with to begin with, then you know it's time. If you cannot, if you look in the mirror and you do not recognize the person that you're seeing in front of you, then you know it's time to walk away. Yeah, absolutely.

Speaker 12:07

Yeah, okay. You're navigating a demanding career, a new marriage, and an MBA all at once. This kind of life integration is becoming more widespread. So, how does your generation approach the conversation around professional ambition and building a personal life? Is there still a sense you have to sacrifice one for the other?

Speaker 1 12:35

I wouldn't say you need, I wouldn't, I wouldn't call it a sacrifice, if I'm being honest with you, because then again, if it's something you've always looked forward to. I mean, I think as Nigerian women, growing up, you're the first thing is, oh, you're gonna get married, you're gonna become a CEO, and you know, you're gonna have this perfect family. We all envision it as women. I did. And so I'm someone who always wanted a family, so you know, marriage and tying in my professional life has never been something that I'll see as I don't I won't say it's a choice. I have to choose between one or the other. However, I understand that you know it's difficult to balance out professional and personal life, and especially as someone who wants to become, you know, a leader or someone who wants to be there for the younger generations to I I wouldn't deceive anyone and say, yeah, it's easy to navigate both of them. However, have a support system and your partner should be that support system. Your partner should support your goals, your dream. You don't want to be with someone who will kill those dreams. Yeah, I think this has been said several times. Never choose someone who will kill your goals. If he doesn't have the same shared vision as you do, he's not the one for you. Right. Unless you want to be a housewife. Now that's a different case. That's absolutely okay. And if you have a partner who supports that, kudos to you. But as a career woman, you need someone who would push you. The days where you're not at 100%, you need someone who will tell you I will take on the rest of the percentage that you're missing. And that is something I have. I think I made an intentional choice before choosing my partner, and I prayed towards that choice. So, um, yes, I was very intentional, and I and I found someone whose goals align with mine. Again, it matters a lot. It does matter. Your goals should align with whoever you're gonna spend eight hours with. It doesn't matter because those, you know, their shared vision will shape you, and we are easily influenced as human beings. So you want to be with someone who will influence you in a way that the society sees you as a better version of you, not as someone who the society sees as loss. I mean, if that makes sense, yeah, yeah, it does. Yeah.

Speaker 15:07

Well, you know, from from what you're saying, why should the career and marriage, why should there be a trade-off? Why can't you have both? And if you're in your marriage, you have a support network and it supports your dreams and your vision and you align, then Bob's your uncle, you're in a great place. All right, part of that journey for you is a beautiful intercultural one. Without needing to share your private details, can you talk about the experience of building a shared world with a partner from a different background? What are you learning about communication and connection?

Speaker 1 15:46

Honestly, um, it's not been an easy journey to navigate, I would say, because we're from total different worlds. However, education plays a very important role.

unknown 15:59

Right.

Speaker 1 16:00

So if you are from different diverse cultures, however, you're both educated, it's easy to communicate. And this communication should start from the onset while you're in your honeymoon phase. Yes, and I think we were very clear from the onset what our expectations of marriage would be like and what it's like, you know, being from different cultures. And I'm very I'm a curious person, and so is he. So he wants to learn more about my culture, and so am I. You know, I mean, I have always, you know, dealt with people from diverse cultures, I would say, even while in the UA, you find people from different countries and different nationalities, and you have to deal with people from these places. However, being, I would say, intimate with someone, it's actually different from having a regular conversation. So um I think communication is we're very open, we're very clear, and then respect, which is very important. And I think that's what's helped us, you know, grow and learn about each other every day. And patience also.

Speaker 17:12

Yes. Patience, great old patience, yes, very, very important. But you have also just completed an MBA in project management. So after years of hands-on experience, what was the catalyst for you to say, now is the time to invest in a formal education and design my next chapter?

Speaker 1 17:36

I would say to begin with, like starting the MBA program was not um, I think it was just something I decided off the bat. Like I didn't just say, oh, you know, I I I think the I was I was longing for something more. Like I was a stage in my career wherein I was like, I thought growing. I want to I want to build a connection where I could leverage on this connection sometime in the future.

Speaker 2 18:03

Right.

Speaker 1 18:03

And I've and I and I figured where's the best way to learn and build a connection, and and I was like, all right, well, there we go. An MBA program where you meet like-minded people, and that's how this whole journey started. And the fur the reason why I started the MBA journey was accomplished before I even started. Wow. Now that is where I met you because I wanted to make a connection, I wanted to, and it's it's so crazy. And then I was like, hang on a second, now you hit one milestone. The main thing that the main reason for studying the MBA program to begin with, and here you are. I think because I was very intentional about why I wanted to study MBA programs to begin with, and I guess that's what helped me to navigate through. And again, um, I would say to those who are hesitant about starting anything, could be a professional certification, could be anything, and because you feel like, oh, maybe I'm too old, or you know, I don't know how I'm gonna react. I've been out of school for so long. I I might not be able to um to answer questions. I'm very shy. I think it applies to a lot of a lot of us, actually in uh my generation, like we just we love to be behind the scenes, but I mean taking that leap of faith led me to where I am today, and of course, meeting you. Now, that MBU program on its own was a whole journey that I would leave for because it really shaped the woman that I am today, and it's helped me grow and develop in ways and in areas where I never thought I would professionally and personally, it did shape the person that I am today. I think one of the the courses, and I've I've discussed this with you know with you especially is the leadership course, right? Because it helped me to reflect deeply on, you know, who do I want to be? What personal am I gonna wear at every stage? Who am I gonna represent? You know, and that really helped me to build and develop myself personally. I would say less of professional, but more personally. I took that NBA personal and it helped me to and it led me to you, Lolita. Yeah, on the very first day.

Speaker 20:25

Yes, it did. You know, when we talk about leadership, we always think it's about the outward leadership. We're talking to other people, we're leading others, but it's a lot to do with our inner leadership, which is why the NBA is so transformative. So, how would you say the NBA has impacted you?

Speaker 1 20:44

Well, um, I think the main transformation is that all my major takeaway from that NBA would be the change transformation because I was going through changes in my life that I was so adamant to accept. I was I was fighting those changes, and a lot of us do struggle. No one change is very uncomfortable. I wasn't ready for that discomfort. And the I remember the last professor that I had that course with, she she made us reflect on you know, what does change really do? Like, what are the pros and cons if you decide to go down the same route? What are the pros and cons of going through that? And I I had to take a pen and paper. And I and I did ask myself, like, what are my pros and cons if I decide to take a leap of faith without going into much details? Um, and I shed tears while I was jutting that out. I didn't realize how much emotional buildup I had during that before I took that course. It led me to be more accepting and it led me to realize that I have resources, I have people around me that I've been pushing away. And I have not reached out, I've not reached my capacity yet. I haven't even started. And I think that's where a lot of women are scared. We are scared to take advantage of the resources we have. That could be in the lives of friends, family, and even professors. I was so scared of reaching out because I felt I was gonna be judged, or you know, people are gonna see me like no, this is such a strong woman that I, you know, portray myself to be. And that is that is where most women forget, yes, we are strong. We've always been thought to be strong, but you can rely on someone. Take a breather, uh utilize the resources you have, build connections that will that will strengthen you, and that's why I said like associate yourself with people who have this not maybe not the same vision, but something better, but they set out to help you, and you know this at a stage in your life, you know those people you can actually turn to. And while I was fighting those changes, or while I was like, I don't want to, I don't want to be there, I don't want to accept it. I kind of I had to open up to people and utilize the resources that I had, yeah, and that that helped me a lot to accept and grow. And look at where I am today.

Speaker 23:20

So yeah, it's such a lovely story. I mean, you know, you're going through these changes and you're trying to navigate at the same time as a wife, as a new wife for that matter, and you know, a new graduate of an MBA, as well as seeking opportunities in a in a foreign land, it's a lot to take on. And so you need to instill a sense of purpose and knowledge about what you want. And it's lovely to see your transformation because I've been with you part of the journey. So I can honestly say that I've seen that transformation in you, and so good on you. Okay, so finally, as you stand at this point in your life, newly married, armed with your MBA, and a solid career, what are the questions you are now asking yourself about the journey ahead?

Speaker 1 24:15

Um, I would say I don't know how to respond to that because um, like I said, every stage in your life is different, right? And every challenge that you face. But what I would say is um never doubt yourself. I think that is something that's a constant reminder I do tell myself that never doubt yourself. And to everyone who feels like, you know, um, I don't know what I'm doing, or I'm lost, and I think most of us do feel that, or I'm not that accomplished, you know, I want to be in a certain place in my life and I'm not there. I would say enjoy the stage you, you know, you pass through to get to exactly where you are, and embrace whatever it is that you are going through, learn from it and move on. Don't don't don't get stuck there. You should like you should never see a challenge as a failure. In fact, it should challenge you to want to get out of that situation and become a better person. So the question that I ask myself in every stage is where I'm at right now, what do I intend to achieve from this? What's what are my goals? Does this align with what I want to do? Because now I'm very intentional in what I want to do in life, and the people that I associate with, places I want to be at, I'm very intentional. I will not just make a random decision anymore, like I did, you know, a couple of years ago. So um, but irrespective of that, if things do not turn out the way I expect them, I will not, that will not turn me off and be like, oh, you know what? I don't, you know, I I'm done. So I always see every stage in my life now as something to embrace and and just keep looking forward. And I've never I'm not gonna say that was to be a showstopper for me if I'm not, if I haven't achieved what I wanted to at the start of whatever I is, whatever project that I've taken at that time. But I would just say it as, you know, no, this is a learning process. This is something I this is what I learned from this, and this is what I'm gonna take home from this. And I move on to the next.

Speaker 26:33

Everything has its season. Uh, you mentioned leap of faith uh a couple of times. So I just wanted to understand. This is my last question, I promise. How important is your faith in your journey?

Speaker 1 26:50

That is my driving factor. I mean, I'm not gonna be one to be all religious and stuff, but my faith has been, I think, the core of everything that I've done in my life.

Speaker 2 27:05

Right.

Speaker 1 27:06

I mean, I grew up in a very conservative home, Christian background, and that has shaped me not to lose who I am today. I I mean, in the being in a country where my parents were not there to, you know, watch about what I do, or you know, I was like, yeah, you're free now. But I always remember, yeah, you're free. No one is looking, no one is looking at you, but it's your creator who's looking at you. And I always put him first. Like in when I said I'm intentional, I'm intentional in my prayers, I'm intentional in everything I do. And that has that has led me to where I am. Like I am, I tell everyone, if you don't believe in anything, believe in your prayers, believe strongly in your prayers. Whoever you're praying to, believe in it. Because your words are powerful, your thoughts are powerful, they shape they shape what you they shape your challenges, they shape who you are and whoever you thre you want to become. Your we need to be very, very intentional as women, and don't let those small voices, you know, crush your dreams. They're always there. Self-doubt. It's something, it's inevitable, I know, but don't let it become louder. That will that it will crush the woman you're looking at in the mirror every morning when you wake up. Certainly will. I've been there, I've been lost, and I I was like, hang on a second, this is not the person you you know you wake up in the morning, like I don't recognize this person. And I decided to make that change, and I took that leap of faith. Well, not without praying, obviously. I did pray, I did fast, and you don't I'm not gonna say, Oh, I heard the voice of God directly say do this or that, but I was open to the guidance. It came in from a friend, it came in from in form of a family, and this is how you know your prayers have been answered. It could be in form of a stranger, but you just have to be open to receiving.

Speaker 29:19

So profound, and I totally relate to what you've just said, and you know, how where you found yourself and how you navigate, it's important that you are grounded in your faith and believe in uh that you are where you're supposed to be. Naomi, you've been such a doll, and I just love your perspective on life, and it's not just young women that are going through you know this navigation of life, but older women as well. And it's interesting to know your perspective to see that most of the challenges are the same, it's just your perception. But when you have faith to help ground you, it gives you clarity. Naomi, I'd like to say thank you for being our guest and giving us your insights. I hope you enjoyed yourself and uh would love to hear from you again.

Speaker 1 30:16

Thank you so much for having me, Lolita. It's been a fun conversation, and I am looking forward to our next meeting. Thank you so much.

Speaker 30:29

So there you have it. I mean, it's really interesting to see how young people are going through life, going through changes, understanding what's happening around them, understanding who they are. It shows that all women go through the same thing. We all need to identify who we are, understand the changes we need to make, navigate through those challenges and be better for it. And most importantly, have our faith to ground us, whatever you believe in, just keeping us grounded and anchored in our beliefs and our values. I hope you've enjoyed this episode and I hope you gained some insights regardless of your age. And I'm hoping that I'll see you soon on the next episode. Thank you.