How to Have a Perfect Life (Cough, Cough)

There's really no such thing as perfection, but some of the biggest things that keeps us from living OUR version of a perfect life is...

* Unrealistic expectations (or any expectations at all)
* Lack of balancing our life's priorities, so we see what's truly important
* Being distracted by shiny objects and/or crippling self-doubt

..but when we change our mindset and get entered around our priorities, what our life should look like becomes a lot clearer. 

Listen in as Alice gives you questions to ask yourself and space for reflection. You can also pick up our totally FREE Lifestyle Self-Made Guidebook to help you put everything into a balance that is perfect...for you. 

More Useful Links for You:

•  GET YOUR FREE "MY LIFESTYLE SELF-MADE GUIDEBOOK":  It's the perfect way to take stock in what you have in your life, so you can balance all the priorities in your life to achieve exactly what you want. Click here to get your guidebook. 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

So let's talk about having a perfect ideal life. And before I admit that the concept is quite BS, I'd like to introduce myself. If we haven't met before, I'm Alice Seba, one of your co-hosts of A Lifestyle Self-Made, where we're dedicated to helping you create the life that you are meant to live, that is in line with your values, that honors the time to spend on the things you want to spend. It's a journey, but there's definitely no perfection. But if you change your mindset, certainly we can come up with a perfect life for ourselves. I say it all the time that when people talk about having reaching their full potential, I always say that's like complete crap because you can never do everything. So every time you reach your potential in a certain area, other things suffer. And there's a lot going on in our life. And if putting your focus into certain areas and not worrying so much about others is good for you, then absolutely you should go ahead and do what is right for your life. But for many of us who may have families, children, tons of things on our plate that we have to balance this and come up with what it is. Because everybody has priorities, different goals, and we all have our own path. And we have to find our own unique way that speaks to what we actually want. There's important work for you to do to figure this out. What is going to be that quote-unquote perfect life? And I think that often when we really reflect on it, the things that we probably thought were part of that perfect life, it's like things that we maybe don't really want because we're not willing to do what it is to get there. Or maybe we're distracted by tons of shiny objects, or maybe our self-doubt is getting in the way. And when people think about their perfect life, they probably think about things like living in a gorgeous mansion, or maybe a secluded cabin in the woods, building a fabulously successful career, or maybe protecting your ability to stay home, staying lovingly married, or maybe it's to be fabulously single forever. Traveling the world or taking a caught cross-country road trip, having a huge family, a small one, or not at all, right? There's so many different routes we can get. And we often think about things in money, where we're living, how we're making a living, our family and loved ones, and so forth. And those are all important things. But when we look at it, think, okay, I want to have a gorgeous mansion. And that's a one-dimensional view, right? It doesn't take into account everything else in one's life if they're coming up with that. And if that's your dream, then it's probably vague or possibly unrealistic, unless you are willing to do what it takes. So here's a question to ask yourself is what do you dream about when you envision your perfect life? And write down a lot of things. Think about the different areas of your life. And if you notice, probably one likely commonality between what you wrote is having the freedom to do what you want and when you want, where you want, et cetera. We call that time freedom, right? If you start by putting that at the top of your list, you can get everything you want out of your life, no matter how unrealistic it might seem at first, because that's how you make your decisions. Time freedom is more than just doing what you want when you want. It is deeper. It's understanding the value of your time and ensuring that you focus it on what matters to you. So understanding that is the difference between envisioning a realistic and unrealistic dream life. For example, worldwide travel isn't practical for most large families. It's not impossible. But you could, and you could make certain sacrifices, create a budget, and start homeschooling your kids. But for the average person, it's not really practical. So I'm definitely not encourag discouraging you from doing anything, but you have to take a good hard look at yourself, your family, and the other factors that you know have to make it a reality. Or another example, a mansion may not be in the cards. If you want to freelance three hours a week and make enough money to have everything else that you want to do in life, that's not gonna get you down that road. So your ability to want material things is in a disconnect with your ability or not ability, your desire to work. And it's all about balance and deciding what's most important for you. Do you want the freedom for an easy work schedule? Or do you want to buckle down and work your butt off for that awesome, cozy cabin in the forest? So I think take that time to look at your description of your dream life and see what's in conflict. Some of the things that I just mentioned. What is on your list that conflicts? What sacrifices would you need to make it all happen? Or maybe ask yourself, what isn't as important as I originally thought? What could you take off that list? Getting what you want out of life means that you have to prioritize. And those priorities are going to change over time as your life grows and changes as well. Having kids, moving house, or switching careers are common life events that cause priorities to shift. And so you have to adapt your vision accordingly. And we do have, if you don't have it yet, we have a free My Lifestyle Self-made guidebook that walks you through a lot of this stuff and goes into more depth and things that I haven't talked about here, but will allow you to do the self-reflection that I'm going to talk about in a second. It can be downloaded for free, and I'm sure you'll find it a great tool to help. Because as we've established, it's really important to make that whole life evaluation. So you can balance all your priorities and start living a life that actually man matches that, right? Instead of yearning for something that doesn't really fit what you want anyway. These are the areas that I would reflect on. And you don't need to memorize them or write them down. Just go grab the lifestyle self-made guidebook, and you'll find the link in the description here. But is your whole entire life as a whole, right? But then your spiritual life and your romantic partnership, relationship with your children. Obviously, if some of these don't apply, then they don't apply. But career and business, relationship with your family, relationship with your friends, you and your community, your physical health, your mental health, and most importantly, your relationship with yourself. So within those categories, ask yourself, you know, what I love about this. What do I love about my spiritual life? What I do I find challenging in my romantic relationship? Or what do I wish I could change in my career and business? And what will I change myself? And then think about the first thing you're gonna do right away. Because you're gonna get some real good clarity right away. So you can start cleaning things up and figuring out what those priorities are. Once you've written that down, take some time and think on it and reflect. Because you're gonna be setting priorities for that. You're gonna identify your values. Like what is most important to you? Is it family, wealth, health, et cetera? What are your long-term and short-term goals? Now you don't have to have it all planned out and mapped out completely, but knowing what you want to accomplish will allow you to evaluate those priorities again and then rank them. And not everything can be a priority in your life or a top priority, right? You're gonna have to whittle that down to three to five things that are above everything else. And for most of us, it's what should be our health, mental and physical health. We should be taking care of ourselves first, our relationship with ourselves first. Because then we can give to others and make that work. But then maybe your next one is family. Maybe after that it's your career or your financial situation, right? And it'll help you make a lot better decisions. And take some time also to think about what time you have now, what resources you have, and what other conflicts are there. And are you making your time? Like you're saying something is important in your life, but you're not making the time for it. Where can you make those adjustments? So our lives like will never be perfect. But the more uh content we can be with what is and consistently line that up with our priorities because sometimes things do get out of whack, but work takes on more importance than it really should. And then you gotta make some decisions about that. And if you're working for an employer, maybe it there is time to dedicate to creating your own thing. And we do have resources for you in that lifestyle self-made guidebook that can lead you to that next thing that you may want to do. Start breaking free from having someone else dictate your time and creating a business that doesn't eat up all your time as well. But creating these opportunities are work, it's not gonna come without some sacrifices, but in your plan, you gotta figure out where you wanna be. So it's not just like a mindset shift, right? And being content and it's actually really rooted in your priorities and values. And the more clear you are on that, the easier it is to move in the direction that you want. Definitely grab that lifestyle self-made guidebook. It's totally free. And if you already have it, but you've forgotten about it, it's always great to go through it again because your answers are going to be different. You have been working on things for a while and your life situation has changed, which has caused your priorities probably to change, but you might still be trying to do things a little out of whack. So grab it, let me know what you think, and let me know how I can help.