Episode 44: Chicken F***'n Booya

In this week's episode we discuss highway trash. The good old days and soup.

Transcript

SPEAKER_05 0:00

I mean, I like it just because I have a thing with like I can't stop eating. And taking this shot, it's like I get full so fast. Like I've never been somebody that like leaves food on a plate. You know, like you go to a restaurant or something. I would have to eat all of it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 0:23

Oh shit.

SPEAKER_05 0:26

Uh but now it's like I I eat like half of it and I feel super full.

SPEAKER_02 0:34

And then you're so cute. Okay, enough. Lay down, get in there.

unknown 1:10

Okay.

SPEAKER_05 1:32

Welcome, everybody, to Comedyville Horror Podcast. We are your host. I'm Russ. I'm Tosh. And we are a brother and sister team, along with two Frenchies that talk about all things spooky and all things stupid.

SPEAKER_00 1:48

Stay.

SPEAKER_05 1:50

Don't look at him.

SPEAKER_00 1:52

Don't look at him.

SPEAKER_05 1:53

Uh oh, so fucking Nancy. Do you want to know how fucking fat I am?

SPEAKER_00 2:01

Oh my god, will you shut up?

SPEAKER_05 2:03

No, so I was driving and I saw it's funny because I I there's like a bike trail like right next to the road, and I saw a bike that like was your bike, and I'm like, this person fucking stole my sister's bike.

SPEAKER_04 2:21

Those bitches.

SPEAKER_05 2:22

Uh but like right by it on the side of the road, there was a full, like the king size Reese's peanut butter cup wrapper, and it looked like it wasn't open. I I almost fucking pulled over. The only thing that stopped me.

SPEAKER_00 2:40

What is wrong with you?

SPEAKER_05 2:41

The only thing that stopped me was that it's a hundred degrees out. I'm like, oh, it's probably melted. For sure it's melted. But I I was seriously going to stop and fucking eat that shit. Even well, you'd have to like rip it open and like fucking slurp out the fucking that's pretty bad. Oh, I know. I I have a problem.

SPEAKER_00 3:02

I typically like to pull over if I see like a cardboard box because I want there to be a box of kittens or puppies or something. How come everybody else can find them, but I can't? Oh, speaking of shit on the side of the road. So forever, and I know other people have also seen this because I've talked to them about it. But off like the Dodge Street, like, you know, where it's like the stupid like curve on ramp, whatever, like the expressway.

SPEAKER_05 3:37

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:38

And there's that old car dealership. It was like a Toyota dealership, and now it's like, who knows, maybe like a CarMax or something. I don't know. No. Maybe, maybe that's what it is. But there's like a grassy knoll for the longest time. I don't know how many years, this fucking like Tupperware, not Tupperware, but like one of those big totes. There was a lid with a rock on top of the lid.

SPEAKER_05 4:06

Don't open it.

SPEAKER_00 4:07

There's a dead body in there.

SPEAKER_05 4:08

Don't do not open that.

SPEAKER_00 4:10

I well, and you like you wouldn't see it because obviously there would be um, like, you know, the grass would be so high and then they would mow it. They would just mow around it. That's I think nobody ever opened it. Ever.

SPEAKER_05 4:24

Yeah, like everybody's too scared to even touch it that they're like, Oh my god. We're we are avoiding this at all costs.

SPEAKER_00 4:31

But like for the longest time, I'm like, we gotta find out what's in that. We gotta go open it. Never did. I don't know if it's still there. I think somebody may have finally moved it, so who knows? And what are you doing, baby? There's a little a-hole. Oh, yeah. Um okay, off. But yeah, man, shit on the side of the road. Do you ever see so I drive a lot around a lot for work? So do you. Who loses their shoes so much? Like, how is this a thing?

SPEAKER_05 5:07

Yeah. Like you you see such random shit on the side of the road all the fucking time. I mean, lots of shoes.

SPEAKER_00 5:14

Do you remember and it would be like you you're like driving? Do you see the one shoe?

SPEAKER_05 5:19

Mm-hmm. And then like four miles later.

SPEAKER_00 5:21

It's the same shoe. It's like the other shoe.

SPEAKER_05 5:24

So like clearly somebody just wonder if it's just homeless people and they're like, I don't like shoes on my feet anymore, and they take one off and then walk like four miles. Maybe take the other. I don't know. It's fucking smoking crap. Uh do you remember back in the day where there would always be a sign on the highways, like uh this highway is adopted by like the fucking Boy Scouts or and then they would like clean up like the trash and shit?

SPEAKER_01 5:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 5:59

So I saw that. Well, I didn't see the sign. I haven't seen a sign in fucking forever. Can you still adopt a highway?

SPEAKER_00 6:07

I don't know.

SPEAKER_05 6:08

We should. That'd be funny. Like adopted by Comedyville horror podcast.

SPEAKER_00 6:13

Oh, that would be fun. That'd be funny. Then we'd have to clean it up. Or we could just have the convex do it.

SPEAKER_05 6:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:19

Isn't that like the work release program or something?

SPEAKER_05 6:21

Where they're like they make license plates.

SPEAKER_00 6:24

No, I think they also have to clean shit.

SPEAKER_05 6:27

I don't know. Well, but that's where I was getting at wasn't ISO.

SPEAKER_02 6:34

Everybody out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Get out. Out Look at the treats. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 6:51

Oh, but where I was getting at with it, uh I saw like on the side of the road is uh like all these trash bags, like every like intersection, like on the corners, like that's what they used to do back in the day. And I was like, fuck, I haven't seen that in years.

SPEAKER_00 7:09

Like cleaning it up?

SPEAKER_05 7:11

Yeah, like where people would clean up the highways and shit.

SPEAKER_00 7:13

Well, that's cool.

SPEAKER_05 7:14

But then uh the bag sat there for like two fucking weeks.

SPEAKER_01 7:18

Oh, that's all right.

SPEAKER_05 7:20

Because I saw a fucking a trash truck drive right fucking by it. Like who fucking picks that shit up? I don't know. Like, cause it used to be like you would see that all the time.

SPEAKER_00 7:30

Oh, yeah. Back in the day, where like people would actually clean up after community service and you know they don't anymore.

SPEAKER_05 7:36

Yeah. Dude, volunteering is so fucking stupid now.

SPEAKER_00 7:39

Seriously.

SPEAKER_02 7:40

I don't have time for it. Well, I do.

SPEAKER_00 7:44

I just I feel like I volunteer my time a lot for my work.

SPEAKER_05 7:48

So I don't. I just oh, did I tell you I quit drinking? Except for like like 10 or 15 drinks a night. Other than that, like I stopped.

SPEAKER_00 7:58

Oh, good for you. That's awesome. So you stopped at like 10 in the morning, right? Like, let's wait for only oh, maybe like 11. I mean, I don't know. I think I started at like 10 30. It's a weekend, so you know what? That's fine.

SPEAKER_05 8:14

Oh, but I I have some I took some notes. Um You're a note taker. One of the things, so I prepare zero. Me, me and my wife, we like oh fuck, we we like a good grilled cheese.

SPEAKER_02 8:27

Oh, I love a grilled cheese.

SPEAKER_05 8:29

She has this thing where she calls it an adult grilled cheese.

SPEAKER_02 8:35

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_05 8:36

Uh, where she puts a bunch of shit on it.

SPEAKER_02 8:40

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 8:41

Uh like tomatoes and like fucking, she'll put meat on. So when does a grilled cheese not be a grilled cheese anymore?

SPEAKER_00 8:51

Well, that's like a sandwich.

SPEAKER_05 8:53

Yeah, like I keep telling her, I'm like, you're making a fucking a panini.

SPEAKER_00 8:57

It's a grilled. Well, yeah, you're probably right.

SPEAKER_05 9:00

You know?

SPEAKER_00 9:01

You know, that's my business model. When I like paninis? No, I want to have like a like I want to do like a cafe, but I want to do no, no. But I want um to have like just different types of like grilled cheese sandwiches. Typically mine will probably not have meat unless it's like a thing, it's like like a grilled even then. That's like a ham and cheese, right? Yeah. Like that so that but I would say I'm I'm gonna be able to do it.

SPEAKER_05 9:33

I feel like if it's anything more than just cheese, it's not a grilled cheese anymore.

SPEAKER_00 9:37

No, I feel like that's incorrect because I've done it with like different cheeses, but then like you throw in like some spices with it or like oh yeah, oh, some garlic salts.

SPEAKER_05 9:47

Yeah, you gotta do garlic salts. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:50

In college, um around Lent, they would make grilled cheese, right? Or whatever, like at the student center.

SPEAKER_05 9:59

I hate how Catholics are so fucking dumb where it's like I don't even care. I would just go six weeks we aren't gonna eat meat on Fridays.

SPEAKER_00 10:08

Right.

SPEAKER_05 10:09

Just one day a week.

SPEAKER_00 10:10

Okay, but listen about this grilled cheese.

SPEAKER_05 10:12

And then they eat fish.

SPEAKER_00 10:13

They would have so it would have so much garlic salt on it with the butter. They like make like a garlic salt butter. Oh my god. It was so good.

SPEAKER_05 10:22

Have you ever made a compound butter?

SPEAKER_00 10:24

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 10:25

Oh fuck, it's so I love it. You could put that shit on anything. Just fucking just spread my cheeks and fucking slide it down my ass crack and I'd fucking I'd eat my own ass.

SPEAKER_00 10:36

Gross. No. He would eat his own ass.

SPEAKER_05 10:41

If I if I took like fucking 45 years of yoga, like I I could probably get to that point.

SPEAKER_00 10:50

You could be the extra limber.

SPEAKER_05 10:52

And you know I would. I would oh fuck. You wouldn't even need a bidet anymore.

SPEAKER_00 10:57

There's so many things you could do.

SPEAKER_05 11:00

Wiping would be obsolete.

SPEAKER_00 11:02

Oh my God. I don't know. I feel like I'm still cleaning myself after a week of floating in the water of the Ozarks.

SPEAKER_05 11:13

Yeah, talk about that.

SPEAKER_00 11:14

Holy shit.

SPEAKER_05 11:15

Because you spent how long like a fucking week there.

SPEAKER_00 11:18

Uh like five days or something like that. Six days.

SPEAKER_05 11:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:22

Um, so we always go down for Aquapalooza. I couldn't even tell you who the bands were because they were pretty shitty. This year was really shitty.

SPEAKER_05 11:30

Um Limbiscuit wasn't there?

SPEAKER_00 11:32

No.

SPEAKER_05 11:33

Oh well. But Was there a gathering of the juggalos?

SPEAKER_00 11:38

Uh no.

SPEAKER_05 11:40

Well, then it wasn't even worth it.

SPEAKER_02 11:43

I mean, let's just say I felt like um I floated like pretty much the whole time.

SPEAKER_05 11:56

But in the water?

SPEAKER_00 11:57

Oh yeah. Like I was just floating on a raft. I became one with the raft.

SPEAKER_05 12:02

What is that a few points? Because I was a little on toxic. You guys have a boat?

SPEAKER_00 12:09

Yeah. So my friend who has a place down there, and that's that's the girls' trip. And um, so like we took out the pontoon a couple of times. And then Is there a slide on it? On the pontoon?

SPEAKER_05 12:21

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:21

No.

SPEAKER_05 12:22

Oh, well then you're not even part of the bottom.

SPEAKER_00 12:23

We're too old for that. I didn't do anything other than float and I woke up with bruises.

SPEAKER_05 12:28

Like, you know, though, too, like there's a slide on the dock. There's a bunch of old fucking guys that got a boat and they're just cruising around looking for uh titties.

SPEAKER_00 12:39

Girl parties. Well, there was some titties in this one. We actually had um, I think last year we had like 12 or 13 girls. This year we had five. So it was super nice. It was just like really um relaxing.

SPEAKER_05 12:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:53

Like really the only agenda that we had was do drugs.

SPEAKER_05 12:58

The one you did a lot of drugs, I bet.

SPEAKER_00 13:00

Was the one the aquapalooza, which was that Saturday. Oh, it was just one night.

SPEAKER_05 13:07

One night. Oh.

SPEAKER_00 13:08

And it's like you're supposed to get there at like 9 30. We didn't in the morning um to get your spot because you tie up all the boats. It was wild. So pretty much our anchors were we were at the end, and so we were holding the line of boats because our anchors were correct, right? They were at an angle. All these other boats, they don't know what the hell they're doing. So they're putting their anchors straight down. And so it's not digging into the mud.

SPEAKER_05 13:37

Is it is it the because there's a a few of the lakes out there that are like 300 feet deep. They're like super fucking deep.

SPEAKER_00 13:45

I mean, I don't know. It's in one of the coves. It's where Captain Ron's is. That's where the Acquapalooza is held. Oh my God. It was crazy. So once we were like ready to leave, number one, we were late. So we had to like go to the back kind of of the line. And um once we lifted our anchors, all of these boats like kind of like broke loose.

SPEAKER_05 14:08

Just scattered. They're everywhere. Like cockroaches.

SPEAKER_00 14:11

And then some guy next to us, he's like, Oh, somebody lost their boat. He's trying to get on the boat. Somebody's boat just floated away. This is not a small boat, mind you. It was a big boat. So everybody's freaking out, thinking they're gonna get hit by this boat. I mean, there was a boat that like came right by us. I was like, oh my god, I don't even know what to do. Like push off.

SPEAKER_05 14:32

Yeah, everybody's wasted.

SPEAKER_00 14:34

Oh my God. So wasted. So wasted.

SPEAKER_05 14:38

That it was just that gives me anxiety of you fucking telling the story.

SPEAKER_00 14:43

Yeah, it totally gave me anxiety. Like, I'm like, this is this is kind of it was, I don't know, but there is something with Missouri people. Um, so I didn't get to see it, but on the way down, I don't remember where we stopped. I think it started with a B. It was like Belton or something, Missouri. And um we all needed to go to the bathroom. Well, it was only a two-holer. So me and another girl sitting on each other's laps taking shit. So me and another girl were just like shopping around.

SPEAKER_05 15:18

Someone's fucking shitting in the sink.

SPEAKER_00 15:20

Well, hold on. Oh my god. So two of the other girls go in first. And um, me and another girl, we were, I mean, we were clear on the other side of the convenience store or whatever. And so we didn't see this chick even leave. And when we get in the car, my friend Sarah's like, Oh my god, did you not see the crack whore? And we're like, What? They're like, we don't know what she was doing in the big stall, but she like wasn't making any noise hardly, but like it sounded like there was like water, like she was like maybe cleaning herself in the toilet. Then she came out and she was like, took her bandana off. She was like washing her parts and like pits and whatever, and washing her face, went to go, I maybe brush her teeth, or was like doing something. Her teeth were crumbling, they were breaking, they were landing in the sink.

SPEAKER_05 16:14

I was like, How did I miss all of this?

SPEAKER_00 16:18

Like I was oblivious. But yeah, they said it was fucking crazy. Like pieces of her teeth were just like breaking in the sink.

SPEAKER_05 16:26

Standing there, like watching her.

SPEAKER_00 16:27

Cause they were trying to wash their hands. I'm like, oh no, no. I'd be like, I will hand sanitize when I get to the car. Like, I'm not doing that.

SPEAKER_05 16:35

I'll fucking eat my hands.

SPEAKER_00 16:36

Oh my God. Like, just the amount of you know, we go, we make our grocery list the whole way down, and then we stop off at a Walmart. Well, we decided to go to a different Walmart than we normally go to. Holy shit. I mean, the weird shit that you see in the parking lot. The blacks. The no, it's just like like I don't even know. And it was funny because we're checking out, and the the young guy, he's like, I'm buying booze, and he's like, Oh, no, I don't need to see your ID. You've been through here before. I'm like, no, I haven't. But okay, thank you.

SPEAKER_05 17:17

It was that was we got carded at Walmart uh where the fucking the lady asked for me and my wife's ID.

SPEAKER_02 17:29

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_05 17:30

And my wife was like, you don't fucking need to see mine.

SPEAKER_00 17:33

Like, what yeah, I don't know. I feel like that used to be a thing where like if you were with somebody. And then they're starting to do it again.

SPEAKER_05 17:41

Yeah, and it's like, no, you fuck off.

SPEAKER_00 17:45

Oh my god, I don't even know.

SPEAKER_05 17:46

Especially like my wife is like a hundred years older than I am. So like it's kind of like asking for her ID is like, is it made out of stone?

SPEAKER_00 17:59

Maybe they just wanted to see if you were related.

SPEAKER_02 18:02

I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 18:03

I don't know. I don't know, but Missouri is a whole different breed. It's everything is like so much slower.

SPEAKER_05 18:14

Well, the people are slower. For sure.

SPEAKER_00 18:16

Like, what?

SPEAKER_05 18:17

Well, I remember there used to be a shirt. Uh it was like Missouri girls use underwear as ankle warmers.

SPEAKER_00 18:28

Ew. I thought that's pretty gross.

unknown 18:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:32

Well, if you saw some of the Missouri girls, I thought, ooh. I will say something really cool that happened. Um, and I'll have to send you a picture of this. So, like in the Ozarks, right? Like it would be like gorgeous and sunny and you're floating, and it's like, oh my gosh, like best sunny day. And then it's like a Florida rainstorm. Like for like three minutes. Fucking nowhere. Yeah. Or like 10, right? Like, and so multiple times it was just like downpour. Like we went and floated over to one of the neighbors because we hadn't been able to talk to her yet. She's so cute. She's lost her husband. She's an older gal. And so we're yelling for her. So we're all in our floaties, floating over to the dock. She comes down literally within 30 seconds of us saying hi, it's torrential downpour. So we're trying to like get back to the dot super fast. Oh my God, we're screaming. It's a shit show. But she came over the next day and just over to my friend's dock, just so we could say hi to her and see how she was doing since her husband passed, unexpectedly, kind of. And killed him. No, no. She's like this cute little southern bell. Like she's just adorable. And so she's hanging out.

SPEAKER_06 19:52

You come over here, I'll get you, I'll I'll fetch you some tea.

SPEAKER_00 19:54

She does. She like, yeah.

SPEAKER_06 19:56

Let me let me get you some of that sweet tea.

SPEAKER_00 19:58

No, she makes um bloody Marys that are good.

SPEAKER_06 20:01

Some bloody Mary. Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 20:04

So she came over and we're just talking, and it was like, oh my god, it was so freaking hot. Like, probably as hot as it is today. Like it was just we were like melting. It wasn't even it didn't even feel good in the water because the water was already getting warm, you know?

SPEAKER_05 20:18

Oh yeah. Where the water's like fucking 80 degrees.

SPEAKER_00 20:22

I was like bath water, and you're like, so she left.

SPEAKER_05 20:25

She's like, although I do love a hot tub. Even if it's hot outside, I'll still fucking get in a hot tub.

SPEAKER_00 20:31

Oh, I do too.

SPEAKER_05 20:32

You know, but this was like because it's like you sweat, but you don't know that you're sweating sort of thing.

SPEAKER_00 20:38

I don't know, but we had already spent multiple days. We were just trying to sweat out our booze, you know? Oh yeah. And so she was like, Well, it's too hot for this old lady. I'm gonna go back. So she goes back to her place and gets in her air conditioning, and all of a sudden, it's like the heavens opened with this fucking rainstorm. Well, the dock is metal, so it sounds like hail.

SPEAKER_04 21:05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 21:05

And so we're like just big raindrops. It's like yeah. Huge. I've never in my life ever seen a rainbow in like the middle of a downpour. That's how normally after, right?

SPEAKER_05 21:18

No, that's how that's how rainbows work.

SPEAKER_00 21:21

No, this was like torrential downpour.

SPEAKER_05 21:23

It's like literally the rainbow is reflecting the light through the fucking rain. That's how Do I have to fucking explain rainbows?

SPEAKER_00 21:34

Okay, but normally it's like after, right? But here's the critical thing.

SPEAKER_05 21:36

It's because the the rain is past you, and then you're seeing Okay, well, this was during.

SPEAKER_00 21:44

And she had just gotten home, and where the rainbow was was right into her house. So we thought it was her husband like saying, Hey. Did you find a pot of gold? No, but we should have but you know what? I was like, we were so we were we kept saying that. We're like, oh my God, we should go swim over there and see if there's a pot of gold. Cause then like after it went to the house, it kind of moved in between the two houses, like right in the water. And that's where I kept seeing this fucking goldfish. I think it was like a big white koi that I was trying to catch. And every time I would cast out, I'd catch a catfish.

SPEAKER_05 22:19

You should oh fucking brought back a koi, I'd put it in my fucking pond.

SPEAKER_00 22:23

It was big. I was like, I've never seen a fish like that. And I'm pretty sure it was a like a koi or something. But super cool. I'll send you the picture because it is wild. You can see the big raindrops, and then you can see this perfect rainbow. It was so fucking cool.

SPEAKER_05 22:39

God, you're so gay.

SPEAKER_00 22:40

I'm so gay. Gave her rainbow.

SPEAKER_05 22:43

Just fucking making rainbows everything.

SPEAKER_00 22:45

I know. I know. So that was super cool. Um, just super relaxing. I am glad we left the day that we did because it was gonna be like here, like 115. I'm like, I can't do that.

SPEAKER_05 22:58

Oh, yeah. Like we had beautiful for the most part. Say this in the fucking last episode, but it is so hot out there.

SPEAKER_00 23:05

Like heat index is 115 today.

SPEAKER_05 23:08

It is fucking ridiculous. And everybody all over, all over the world that listen set out a little saucer of water and ice for your local goth kids. Because, honey, they are dying out there. Oh these goths are fucking dying.

SPEAKER_00 23:27

Well, did you see what our niece was wearing? I go, are you dying right now? She was wearing sweatpants, a long sleeve shirt, and a t-shirt over it, and it was 105 yesterday.

SPEAKER_05 23:40

I wear shorts all the time and I'm fucking dying.

SPEAKER_00 23:43

Oh my god. I mean, I could be.

SPEAKER_05 23:44

Like I can't be as goth as I want because I would explode.

SPEAKER_00 23:50

We want to do a goth episode. And we were talking about how we we can't do it.

SPEAKER_05 23:56

We can't do it in summer. Like in the next fucking three months.

SPEAKER_00 24:02

We're too hot. We're too hot. If we put makeup on, which is why I'm wearing literally none today, it like it'll just melt off. I can't. Like it's so bad.

SPEAKER_05 24:12

We we get it from our dad who Oh God. I'm fucking sweating tits or whatever the fuck you'd say. Sweat my tits off.

SPEAKER_00 24:21

Like, okay, dad. Oh my God. But yeah, I will. I I mean, even in the winter, I'll still wear a tank top with like a cardigan over it because I'm like, I'm good. That's fine.

SPEAKER_05 24:32

That's oh, that fucking that shirt that I bought.

SPEAKER_00 24:35

What shirt? Oh, the Western one?

SPEAKER_05 24:37

Yeah. Uh so I did not know it is fucking thick.

SPEAKER_00 24:42

I felt it. I'm like, you're gonna die in there.

SPEAKER_05 24:45

Yeah, exactly. And I I got it for my niece's wedding. Jesus Christ. That is in like a few weeks. I am oh fuck. Somebody needs to set out a little saucer for me.

SPEAKER_00 24:58

Seriously.

unknown 24:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:00

Something.

SPEAKER_05 25:01

I know. And the problem is like I've already fucking bought it. Like there's no going back.

SPEAKER_00 25:06

I can give you my neck van. So I have these, it's like a neck thing. I bring it to the Ozarks and it you can point it up. I'm telling you, save my life every time we would go into a cove, right? Like you're driving on or you're boating on the main drag, and you're like, oh wind, great. And then we go to slow down and we're like, that's dude.

SPEAKER_05 25:26

Right now, like just going outside where you're like, I can't breathe. Oh. Because the humidity is a thousand percent.

SPEAKER_00 25:33

Try having two French bulldogs, one that can't breathe anyway. I'm like, get inside. Fucking doing the heimlick on you.

SPEAKER_05 25:40

Uh we bought these fans on Amazon, these little handheld fans.

SPEAKER_00 25:45

Oh, yeah. And they sprit spritz water.

SPEAKER_05 25:47

No, not these ones. But these ones are like where it's like a fucking leaf blower. Where they blow so fucking hard. I'm like, these are the best goddamn thing ever.

SPEAKER_00 25:58

Really? Send me the link.

SPEAKER_05 26:00

We we haven't used them because we forget to fucking bring them anywhere that we go.

SPEAKER_00 26:06

And when it's this hot, you don't go outside.

SPEAKER_05 26:08

Yeah. Well, and that's I so like my fucking house, my goddamn trailer. It gets so fucking hot. Uh, but my wife bought a like a battery-powered fan. And it it has like a giant fucking brick, like you know, that huge power banks. Oh yeah. Uh so it'll last like fucking four days on a high.

SPEAKER_01 26:32

Nice.

SPEAKER_05 26:33

Uh but it's it's got like a mister thing on it too. But the misting is annoying. Uh uh, but like I I just set it like right in front of me, just fucking blowing on him.

SPEAKER_00 26:44

She's just sweating in the cold. Constantly. But she's always cold. She's cold. Yeah. I don't understand people like that. I met a lady yesterday and she's like, I'm just cold all the time. I'm like, how?

unknown 26:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 26:56

What are you talking about? I'm just sweating.

SPEAKER_05 27:00

Well, because they're so used to being in hell.

SPEAKER_00 27:03

I don't know.

SPEAKER_05 27:04

And then they're like, oh, it's just it's so cold up here. Seriously. Oh my God.

SPEAKER_00 27:10

I like this time of year, I dread going into my like for my job, people, like old people's homes.

SPEAKER_05 27:17

Yeah, because they set the thermostat to 95.

SPEAKER_00 27:21

Even Friday. Friday was not as hot, right, as yesterday or today. It was it was like raining that morning, but it was humid. It was like sticky when I got out of my car and I go into this house. And they're cute. They're like 80, late 80s. It was 85 at least in there. And I'm like, uh-huh, trying to like have like a conversation and just like my it's sweat, it's just coming down.

SPEAKER_05 27:49

Listen, you're gonna die soon, but my tit sweat is so fierce right now.

SPEAKER_00 27:55

I was like, I might die in here. Like it was so freaking bad. Oh my god. I just felt like so gross after that. This is why I have like three things of deodorant in my work bag at all times. I'm just like everywhere.

SPEAKER_05 28:09

Oh, I know. That's I I put I put deodorant on the old fucking the taint so that like the the fucking the ball sweat.

SPEAKER_00 28:19

They're just not rubbing.

SPEAKER_05 28:20

Oh yeah, and that's that's the I hate when people are like they're putting fucking gold bond powder on their balls, and it's like that doesn't work.

SPEAKER_01 28:29

I feel like it would just get like clumped. That's what I'm like.

SPEAKER_05 28:32

Yeah, put deodorant, fucking Russ's tip deodorant on the fucking schnitzel sack.

SPEAKER_00 28:39

Well, they call they make stuff for that. It's called like loomy.

SPEAKER_05 28:43

That stuff doesn't work. I've tried I've tried it.

SPEAKER_00 28:45

Oh, I don't know.

SPEAKER_05 28:46

Because it's like aluminum free. No, honey, you need the aluminum.

SPEAKER_00 28:51

Okay. We're gonna talk about aluminum free. I was like, oh, so if I use this deodorant that has aluminum in it, it's gonna increase my risks of dementia, right? Well, I don't really need to increase that risk any more than I already have.

SPEAKER_05 29:06

Who cares about dementia anymore?

SPEAKER_00 29:08

So I was trying to be like, this is a couple years ago.

SPEAKER_05 29:11

Yeah, exactly. A couple years ago when when it got like where everyone found out, like, oh fuck, like aluminum is really bad for you.

SPEAKER_00 29:20

So I'm like, I'm gonna try this native deodorant. Native, we're Native American. It's gonna be good, right? And so I got it. Probably let's say three or four days into it. I woke up and it hurt to lower my arms.

SPEAKER_03 29:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:38

And I'm like, what's going on? I went to my doctor and I was like, I have like lumps all over. I had sebaceous cysts in my arm for Jesus because of it would like clogged my pores.

SPEAKER_05 29:54

But the whole point of like the aluminum-free shit is uh because the aluminum clogs your pores and then you have to keep like applying it or whatever.

SPEAKER_00 30:03

And I had to go on antibiotics to help my four armpits that were so swollen and infected. And he goes, Why you of all people? He's like, was your other deodorant not working for you? And I go, No, it was working. I just didn't want to get Alzheimer's. And he goes, You of all people who you're allergic to everything, don't switch. If it's working for you and you're not allergic to it, don't switch. He was so pissed off at me. I was like, okay. So don't use the aluminum-free deodorant. Well, and it's like if you're a ginger, don't use it.

SPEAKER_05 30:40

Yeah. Well, I like what I hate is that the deodorant doesn't fucking work. You smell worse.

SPEAKER_00 30:48

I'd like to say I smell earthy when it stops working.

SPEAKER_05 30:53

Well, and that's uh I smell like a hippie. I I want to do one of those. Have you ever seen like an allergy test where like they'll like fucking do your back in like a fucking grid and like it's just gonna say give up now.

SPEAKER_00 31:08

End it.

SPEAKER_05 31:10

But I that would be fun. But I don't know if I'm allergic to anything. Oh, I haven't I don't think I've found anything that I've like I've learned.

SPEAKER_00 31:21

If I find something that works, just fucking stick to it. Cause that's that's it.

SPEAKER_05 31:26

I'm Yeah, just set set in your old ways, Nancy.

SPEAKER_00 31:30

My sensitive skin. Uh-huh. It's like no dyes or anything, no smells.

SPEAKER_05 31:38

It's getting like ridiculous with all the products now of like lying to you. Well, and it's it's like every no matter what will have like another version of it that's supposed to be better for you. Or where you know what I mean? It's like, well, why not just fucking make the original fucking You know what I just saw?

SPEAKER_00 32:00

Macaroni and cheese. They're making protein. Yeah, exactly. You can fuck off right now.

SPEAKER_05 32:05

Yeah, there's fucking high protein Pop Tarts in powder. If if you're eating a fucking Pop Tart because it has high protein, you are not on a fucking diet. So high protein Doritos, fuck off. Like you're you don't give a shit about your health if you're trying to eat the healthy version of Doritos.

unknown 32:27

Fuck off.

SPEAKER_00 32:28

I know. Everything is like high protein, high protein. I'm like, well, uh Oh, I do so let's talk about some spooky shit. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_05 32:37

For once. Because this is a fucking horror podcast.

SPEAKER_00 32:41

I mean, we're talking about my sebaceous cyst in my armpit, so that's scary.

SPEAKER_05 32:45

Have you seen uh you know, one of my favorite franchises is Friday the 13th.

SPEAKER_00 32:52

Mm-hmm. I knew that.

SPEAKER_05 32:53

So they are making a uh television show of it. Right? I'm fucking I'm down, right? Yeah, I'm just I'm fucking bricked because I like TV shows of horror stuff.

SPEAKER_00 33:11

Yeah, me too.

SPEAKER_05 33:11

Like I'm fucking rock hard about this.

SPEAKER_02 33:15

And then it comes out that it's about Jason's mom when she's young. Totally flaccid.

SPEAKER_05 33:29

I am not about this.

SPEAKER_00 33:30

It's like Nobody wants to hear about his mom.

SPEAKER_05 33:33

I know. It's like you built a franchise. So okay, so the first movie is the mom.

SPEAKER_01 33:38

Right.

SPEAKER_05 33:39

Uh gets her fucking which I I do love how this franchise fucking totally flipped the script. Right?

SPEAKER_00 33:49

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_05 33:49

Where like most of the time it's like it it sticks with the person, the from the character, yeah. You know, but this one, it's not until the third movie does he get the fucking hockey mask.

SPEAKER_00 34:02

Maybe we need to maybe that should be our next movie.

SPEAKER_05 34:05

What should we do? So speaking of like uh When are they coming out?

SPEAKER_00 34:10

When is it coming out?

SPEAKER_05 34:11

Should we um I think October?

SPEAKER_00 34:14

Oh, this would give us time.

SPEAKER_05 34:15

On uh Piss Penis, I believe. Peacock. Oh but no, uh like maybe for our next movie, should we do uh where we watch the first episode of some series?

SPEAKER_01 34:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 34:34

Uh because there's a whole bunch of them out there. There's like the Chucky.

SPEAKER_00 34:39

Uh we already did Chucky.

SPEAKER_05 34:42

No, like of there's like the original? Like no, like a TV show.

SPEAKER_01 34:48

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_05 34:49

Uh there's Ash versus Evil Dead. I love that fucking show so much.

SPEAKER_00 34:55

I think that'd be fun.

SPEAKER_05 34:56

Uh yeah, where we just watch like the first episode, review it, and then then we see which one we like the most, and then we watch more of it.

SPEAKER_00 35:04

Oh, that'd be fun. Yeah. Maybe we do like three or four.

SPEAKER_05 35:08

Yeah, three or four different ones. Yeah. Because there's a whole bunch out there. Uh what's the one? Stan versus evil.

SPEAKER_00 35:16

I don't even know if I've seen some of these.

SPEAKER_05 35:18

It has the the Dr. Cox from Scrubs.

SPEAKER_00 35:21

Oh, really?

SPEAKER_05 35:22

Yeah. Oh, it's so funny.

SPEAKER_00 35:23

Okay, let's do that.

SPEAKER_05 35:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 35:26

Uh also we should we should take like a fucking improv class together? That'd be funny.

SPEAKER_00 35:35

Now he's getting crazy. We can barely schedule this.

SPEAKER_05 35:39

I know. It is so hard to even uh just record the podcast. But you know what though? I love doing this so much.

SPEAKER_00 35:47

I do too.

SPEAKER_05 35:47

Like it's honestly like the highlight. Like we don't record every week, but like we try. It's like the highlight of my week.

SPEAKER_00 35:54

Oh.

SPEAKER_05 35:55

Just to like sit and fucking chat.

SPEAKER_00 35:58

I know, right? When we have like good conversation.

SPEAKER_05 36:02

Yeah. Because it's like we can talk about fucking anything. We could talk about fucking spreading our fucking butt cheeks.

SPEAKER_00 36:07

We normally talk about shit.

SPEAKER_05 36:09

Yeah. Like if there is an episode that doesn't have shit talk in it, let me know. Because I don't think one extra we also got that from dad. So have you have you listened to Nickelback?

SPEAKER_00 36:26

Oh my god, like forever ago.

SPEAKER_05 36:28

So this is my thing. So when what album was it? Silver Side? When that album came out, I fucking loved it. Because it was rock, you know? Like back then I was into like Godsmack. You know, like the shit rock.

SPEAKER_00 36:44

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 36:45

You know, type of stuff.

SPEAKER_00 36:46

Loser.

SPEAKER_05 36:47

Uh but like have you listened to them recently?

SPEAKER_01 36:53

No.

SPEAKER_05 36:54

They are they're heavier, like, cause they they they were like rock, and then like as they got more popular, they went into like the shit rock. Yeah, you know, because we all just want to be big rock stars. Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 37:07

You know, like that, like, look at this photograph. Okay.

SPEAKER_05 37:12

You know, like fucking like gay shit.

SPEAKER_01 37:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 37:16

But then when they fell off, like after they were done with all that shit.

SPEAKER_00 37:21

Then they decided to go on their own.

SPEAKER_05 37:23

Then they're like, they got back into like fucking doing like actual fucking like heavier stuff. And I'm like, this is kind of fucking good. Okay. You know? Like I'm like, God, when when did nickelback fucking get good? You know? Oh dear God. I don't know. Like I wouldn't say that I was a fan.

SPEAKER_00 37:48

I think you totally just got really excited about it.

SPEAKER_05 37:52

Well, but like back in the day.

SPEAKER_00 37:53

Right. You know, like we listened to dumb shit back in the day.

SPEAKER_05 37:56

Yeah. It's like it is weird how like like Silver Chair. Silver Chair.

SPEAKER_02 38:02

You can't wait till tomorrow. Right? Wasn't that Remember Silverchair? That was a Pearl Jam song. No. Wasn't it?

SPEAKER_00 38:12

It wasn't. Silverchair. It's that weird guy.

SPEAKER_02 38:16

Did I tell you that not that long ago I found out what fucking Pearl Jam means? What? Cum. Are you serious? Yeah. Pearl?

SPEAKER_00 38:30

What color is a pearl?

SPEAKER_05 38:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 38:32

White jam?

SPEAKER_05 38:33

It's cum.

SPEAKER_00 38:34

I don't know about that.

SPEAKER_05 38:35

No, no, it literally is.

SPEAKER_00 38:38

We're gonna we're gonna find this. Eddie Vetter, if you're listening.

SPEAKER_05 38:43

And we know you are.

SPEAKER_00 38:44

For sure. Please let us know what pearl jam means.

SPEAKER_05 38:47

Yeah, Mr. Eddie. Uh but so along with music, I don't know if you've seen. Have you even seen uh you know that I'm a Satanist. I love I love Satan.

SPEAKER_00 39:04

Uh but so my god, you're so full of shit.

SPEAKER_05 39:06

Uh fucking I know, I'm just atheist. I but well and Satanism is atheism. It just fights against religion in general. Uh but anyways, so there is a satanic duop group.

SPEAKER_00 39:27

Please don't get involved in this.

SPEAKER_05 39:29

Called Twin Temple. So they they've been making the news because uh this uh racist piece of shit, Charlie Crockett, for some reason fucking had them on his tour. Uh and then he found out that they're Satanist. They don't hide the fact like literally every song, their whole thing is about Satan.

SPEAKER_00 39:50

Oh my god, really?

SPEAKER_05 39:51

Yeah. But the the music is wonderful. You you should check it out. Like, because it's it's like old timey doo-op.

SPEAKER_00 39:59

Okay. I'm not a Satanist though.

SPEAKER_05 40:02

You can still I'll listen to it. You can still have Satan in your heart. Even stop so like kick them off the tour, right? Which honestly, the best thing for them because then it got in the news. They are getting really fucking popular now.

SPEAKER_00 40:21

Really?

SPEAKER_05 40:22

Because of this.

SPEAKER_00 40:24

Maybe you need to play one of these songs or whatever. Can you find a clip?

SPEAKER_02 40:29

I don't know about the whole like fucking copyright shit. Oh, yeah. No, not right now. We'll look it up later. Yeah. Uh but it's like it's one of those things that I'm into metal. Right. That's that's my you know my genre. Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 40:49

But every fucking metal guy or girl or whatever, anybody that listens to metal also listens to everything else.

SPEAKER_04 40:57

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_05 40:58

And that's where like I can I can fuck around with some fucking blues, some fucking chests.

SPEAKER_00 41:04

Like I like metal. I like I really listen to just about everything. Yeah. You know. But I know like what songs I like. You know what I mean?

SPEAKER_05 41:14

Like what you know who I fucking love, but I don't think I know a single one of her songs.

SPEAKER_02 41:23

The what is it, uh Sabrina Carpenter? Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 41:30

Uh because what I love about her is that she doesn't take herself seriously.

SPEAKER_01 41:38

Oh, well, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 41:39

You know, where like she can laugh. Oh, yeah. But like she laughs at herself. You know, and she's a very beautiful woman. Uh talented, I'm guessing. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 41:52

Well, yeah.

SPEAKER_05 41:53

But you know what I mean? Like, I love like when people can make fun of themselves. Somebody, yeah, somebody famous can have a sense of humor because it seems like there isn't any more.

unknown 42:04

Oh.

SPEAKER_00 42:04

I just I mean laughter. Like that is one thing I will say. And to circle back to my girls' trip, I laughed the entire time. My I went to bed so many nights that I'm like, my cheeks hurt so bad.

SPEAKER_05 42:21

Yeah. And then you you just cackle.

SPEAKER_00 42:23

Oh my god. It was so funny. It was so funny. I mean, I came up with some pretty great um business pro like ideas, like OnlyFans. I have like Hobbit feet. So I think I can make money, these fucking be bitches. Where like people will pay money to like Yeah, there's there is only flick my feet, or like I could make like a pearl jam potion and then just squirt it on there, and people I could make millions.

SPEAKER_05 43:03

I don't know about fucking millions you don't even know.

SPEAKER_00 43:06

Look at these toes. They're like Fred Flintstone fucking feet over here.

SPEAKER_05 43:09

I don't want to.

unknown 43:10

Okay, that's gross.

SPEAKER_00 43:12

Well, and that's like I was so creative on this trip.

SPEAKER_05 43:15

Well, and dude, if I was a hot girl, yeah, there's no way that we'd be doing a podcast because I would be showing my fucking butthole to anybody that had three dollars.

SPEAKER_00 43:27

Who wants to see a butthole?

SPEAKER_05 43:30

Maybe you don't, but that's that men are fucking gross.

SPEAKER_02 43:36

I don't want to see a butthole.

SPEAKER_05 43:38

Well, you're not paying the three dollars to see it.

SPEAKER_00 43:40

Well, that's true.

SPEAKER_05 43:42

I mean, we couldn't even get Patreon subscriptions, so yeah, we we gave up on the fucking Patreon because these hobbit foods screaming into the void.

SPEAKER_00 43:54

Oh, had to go somewhere with it.

SPEAKER_05 43:56

Yeah. Any other business adventures that maybe we

SPEAKER_00 44:00

Should well there was a boat, a pontoon boat that was a taco boat. I would call it taco boat about it. I was I was you know, I say let's taco about hospice.

SPEAKER_05 44:13

So I would call it she dresses up like a fucking taco.

SPEAKER_00 44:17

I do.

SPEAKER_05 44:17

Jesus.

SPEAKER_00 44:18

I just did that last week. Um let and I got him Taco Bell, and there's this cyclo whatever, the freaking parasite.

SPEAKER_05 44:24

Yeah, so you gave all of these dying people diarrhea.

SPEAKER_00 44:28

It was for the staff. And I didn't put I didn't think about it. I dressed up as a taco and gave them a pair of things.

SPEAKER_05 44:34

Because they had fucking massive diarrhea.

SPEAKER_00 44:37

It was like, how come no one's eating my tacos when I got there in my taco costume? Now I know. Um, but it was let's taco boat it. That would be it.

SPEAKER_05 44:50

See though, I think tacos are overplayed. There's so many, like, we live in America where everyone here is Mexican. And it's like, I mean, you are the the town that I fucking live in has let's say 135 Mexican restaurants.

SPEAKER_00 45:10

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 45:11

And it's like uh there's fucking Mexican food trucks fucking everywhere.

SPEAKER_00 45:15

I know, but it's really cool to see it on a boat.

SPEAKER_05 45:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 45:18

You know what I mean? So I feel like the other thing could be like a bait boat.

SPEAKER_05 45:24

Or like soup. Something like you hit the wave and it's just gone. Yeah, it's like you have a giant of fucking soup and it's constantly like fucking big.

SPEAKER_00 45:35

Give me chicken fucking booya. Uh dad's cauldron of soup. Chicken fucking booya.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

What?

SPEAKER_00 45:43

I told you that when I went to visit and he had his camper out at Crivets, Wisconsin, and he was getting so antsy and he's like, we gotta get to the bar. We gotta get to the bar. I'm like, why? Oh, the fucking supper club? No, it was just this bar, and he's like, they're gonna have chicken fucking booya. Chicken fucking booya. I'm like, dad.

SPEAKER_05 46:05

Is that like actually what it's called?

SPEAKER_00 46:06

It's called chicken booya. Seriously, look it up. And I'm like, okay, we're okay, we'll get there. So we get there and I'm like, what is this? It's like the one time in Wisconsin that it was like a hundred degrees out, it was so hot, and we gotta go to this fucking bar. And I'm like, Dad, what is it? He's like, it's so good. It's like soup. It's like soup. I'm like, okay. So we walked in the bar. Dad's just sweating. I mean sweating.

SPEAKER_05 46:36

And what the waitress comes up. What a fucking nightmare eating soup when it's fucking hot.

SPEAKER_00 46:41

Oh my God, right?

SPEAKER_05 46:42

I'm like, like you have to be I don't want there was a guy at work. He was like, Oh, I made beef stew last night. And I'm like, it's a thousand degrees out. What the fuck are you doing?

SPEAKER_00 46:55

Well, it's like old people. They like want to eat too. So I'm like, Dad. So the waitress comes over and he's like, Where's the booya? Where's the booya? And she's like, sir, it's outside in the cauldron and it's not done yet. Okay. Well, honey, where's he's like, Where's the where are the bowls, honey? Honey, where are the bowls? She's like, When it's ready, I mean, there's gonna be bull, there's bulls out there. Dad just goes out, it's a cauldron. So they're making this outside. And he just starts scooping it into a bowl. It's not done.

SPEAKER_05 47:27

He's sweating the chicken. Oh God. He's sweating into it.

SPEAKER_00 47:31

Oh my God. And they're like, sir, it's not ready. So it's like a it would be like a chicken gumbo, but it's like, or like a chicken noodle soup, but spicy. Like spicier, like a little and dad's just eating it. I'm like, that's not done, Dad. It's okay.

SPEAKER_05 47:46

He's getting food poisoning from the hookin'.

SPEAKER_00 47:49

Then the next day he's like, Oh no, I'm got the shit. Okay. Well, because you ate raw chicken. But it's yeah, so it's a cauldron. You gotta look it up. He was such a character.

SPEAKER_05 48:00

Such a fucking crazy person. I love it. It doesn't even make any sense. Like, really? How how let's look at us. How did we survive?

SPEAKER_00 48:11

How did we become so normal?

SPEAKER_05 48:13

Yeah, we are the most normal fucking people I've ever met.

SPEAKER_00 48:17

Sure. I don't know how we survived.

SPEAKER_05 48:19

Like honestly, like how did those genes not just fucking implode on themselves?

SPEAKER_00 48:25

Oh my god. Right. Like, how did even a swimmer get to the egg? I'm surprised it didn't just like go back.

unknown 48:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:35

Like put it in reverse, Terry.

SPEAKER_05 48:37

It's a real fucking miracle that it.

SPEAKER_00 48:38

Oh my God, here we are.

SPEAKER_05 48:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:41

I'm sure we're missing like at least a couple of chromosomes.

SPEAKER_05 48:44

With that in mind, fucking use a condom. Jesus. Don't make any more babies.

SPEAKER_00 48:50

Double bag it something. I don't know.

SPEAKER_05 48:54

We don't need any more. Like uh especially like being at that fucking convention. Oh my God. It's kind of like we need to stop reproducing. For sure. Or too many bad apples.

SPEAKER_00 49:09

How about the lady that was Did you see the lady that was wearing like a, you know, like steampunk, but like the actual like face mask, like a old like military mask, gas mask on the way out? I was like, okay.

SPEAKER_05 49:22

It's too much. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 49:23

Like I hadn't even stepped foot in yet, and I was like, oh fuck, here we go. Good night.

SPEAKER_05 49:30

There were so many freaks.

SPEAKER_00 49:33

Oh can't we do like what do they do in like Africa?

SPEAKER_05 49:38

They're like they give them AIDS.

SPEAKER_00 49:41

No. It's like cutting out the parts, but I don't know. Castration.

SPEAKER_02 49:49

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 49:50

It's illegal.

SPEAKER_00 49:53

I guess. Maybe it shouldn't be sometimes.

SPEAKER_05 49:55

Maybe we should just fucking have forced gender reassignment surgeries.

SPEAKER_00 50:00

No.

SPEAKER_02 50:02

Absolutely not. That's a metal song. It actually is. I believe uh cattle decapitation.

SPEAKER_05 50:14

Anyways.

SPEAKER_00 50:15

I mean.

SPEAKER_05 50:15

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 50:16

Well, I think we've nailed it here.

SPEAKER_05 50:17

Yeah. Oh, let me see what what else? So I was I was thinking about this, and I have no idea. You know, you know children, right?

SPEAKER_01 50:24

No.

SPEAKER_05 50:25

Oh. I mean, I do. You just hang around the playground. Yeah, sometimes. So do kids have computer classes anymore?

SPEAKER_00 50:34

I mean, I would think so.

SPEAKER_05 50:36

Because so like But they probably do it really early. But they they have like their own computers and shit.

unknown 50:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 50:42

Like their lap like the school. It's like a notebook.

SPEAKER_00 50:45

Like a I don't know what it's called, but yeah.

SPEAKER_05 50:48

Yeah. So but like do they have a class on it?

SPEAKER_00 50:51

Because I feel like now like kids they just fucking know how to do it when they're like three years old.

SPEAKER_05 50:56

Do they even need to fucking teach a kid? No. Like computers. They're like here. They literally will give it three years. Like I'm so goddamn stupid.

SPEAKER_00 51:08

I mean, I'm sure there's like things that they're learning within like certain keys.

SPEAKER_05 51:12

Do they have like keyboarding class? Remember when we had to do that shit?

SPEAKER_00 51:15

Yeah, and I sucked.

SPEAKER_05 51:17

Did so I was a pecker. Oh, yeah, I'm a fucking hunting peck.

SPEAKER_01 51:22

No, me too.

SPEAKER_05 51:23

Uh well, no, so you would have been like a typewriter. Like they brought out like an old timey typewriter. No, we had fucking computer and then you had a fucking slide about it. Jesus Christ. You had computers?

SPEAKER_00 51:34

Yeah, we had computers.

SPEAKER_05 51:36

Was it literally the first computer?

SPEAKER_00 51:38

I'm gonna punch you. You know I'm as old as the same age as your wife.

SPEAKER_05 51:46

I'm fucking ancient. Uh like because when we had computer class, we had old fucking computer, like fucking floppy disk, like where it was the keyboards were yellow.

SPEAKER_00 51:59

I mean, there were still like floppy disks and stuff.

SPEAKER_05 52:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 52:03

But like But it was still a computer.

SPEAKER_05 52:07

Yeah, but I mean like it had to have been old. So like did you have like did did you have to like time like to see because for some reason that was a thing back then was how many words per minute because we're all gonna end up being a fucking secretary for some reason?

SPEAKER_00 52:24

Right. Data entry.

SPEAKER_05 52:26

Yeah, like well, I feel like though back then it was like, look, women, you're either gonna be a nurse or a fucking secretary. That's the only jobs for you.

SPEAKER_00 52:37

Or a teacher.

SPEAKER_05 52:38

Yeah. So like they had to fucking train everybody. Oh, did you ever have fucking home egg?

SPEAKER_00 52:45

Oh, I loved homeg. That was like my favorite class. I learned how to use a sewing machine. I made like a stuffed animal.

SPEAKER_05 52:59

He literally went brrrrrr right over his fucking fingers.

SPEAKER_00 53:02

What a whack a doodle. Yeah. And then he like he like fucking showed it off. People are weird.

SPEAKER_04 53:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 53:10

People are weird.

SPEAKER_04 53:11

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 53:13

I remember I still remember like some of the things that like I learned how to cook in a home.

SPEAKER_05 53:17

Do you did you have Apple crisp? Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 53:20

So good.

SPEAKER_05 53:21

I I love my friend, like my high school best friend. Uh he fucking it was supposed to be like a a tablespoon of salt or something. He put like two fucking cups in like whatever it was, like fucking brownies or something. Yeah. So bad. It was the fucking the the teacher, she like took a bite of it.

SPEAKER_04 53:46

She's like, This is not good.

SPEAKER_05 53:49

And like just put put the cover on it and she's like, we are not eating these.

SPEAKER_03 53:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_05 53:55

No. But did you have uh I remember we had the teacher had this big like like fake check thing, right? Fake what? Check. Like kind of like a a publisher's clearing house. Oh, the, you know, like a big check. Yeah. But it was like blank, and so she would like write on it, and then we had like these like printouts of checks, so we would have to fucking write checks.

SPEAKER_01 54:22

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 54:23

Like practice. And you know, it was like, do whatever you want, like, you know, like make it out for how much, you know, like so you do like six billion dollars, you know, and then in the memo you say, like, for my juicy butthole or something, you know, it's like fucking something. Is that what you did? Well, I I would always put like cocaine, but like I was so stupid and didn't know how to fucking spell cocaine.

SPEAKER_00 54:48

Oh my god. It was with a K. Yeah, I mean it was so stupid.

SPEAKER_05 54:53

But you know, like you you always did fucking crazy shit like that.

SPEAKER_00 54:56

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_05 54:57

But it's like it's so wild that we had to learn that, and then like I've written like five checks in my life.

SPEAKER_00 55:04

Really?

SPEAKER_05 55:06

Checks are like fucking obsolete now. When was the last time you wrote a check?

SPEAKER_02 55:10

I don't know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_05 55:14

Yeah, like it's it's so crazy that like we spent so much time in our childhood learning these things that means nothing. Like fucking typing, like how many words per minute.

SPEAKER_00 55:30

Well, I don't know, because I'm still I'm still a one thumber on texting on your phone. But I see like all these kids that are like no But like I see all these kids that are like I'm like oh that's that's so fast. I can't, I'm not fast.

SPEAKER_05 55:48

Oh, I remember when I'm too old. When phones uh switch into the keyboard where you could like slide in.

SPEAKER_00 55:55

I loved it.

SPEAKER_05 55:56

Fuck I love that. But then it's like you you did it so much that you couldn't read the letters anymore, but you knew because it's yeah, you just oh I loved mine.

SPEAKER_00 56:06

I love my little slide phone.

SPEAKER_05 56:08

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_00 56:08

So good. I know. We should just well, because kids are just gonna be dumb.

SPEAKER_05 56:14

Well, and it's have you seen like the new fucking Samsung phones or like uh flip phones that fucking like they'll fucking flip this way and then flip this way. Yeah. And it's like, Jesus, like I don't need that big. I don't need to remember too when phones were like they were getting smaller, smaller, smaller, smaller, smaller. And now it's the opposite, where it's bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger, bigger.

SPEAKER_00 56:36

Right?

SPEAKER_05 56:36

Like it's like a break. We've come like full circle.

SPEAKER_02 56:39

I know. It's crazy. I love it. Bye. See ya.