Austin Powers in Goldmember

On this episode of The Drop Box, I’m joined by my guest Karlo as we take a groovy trip back into the absurd, over-the-top world of Austin Powers in Goldmember. From unforgettable one-liners to some of the wildest characters in comedy, we break down what makes this movie such a chaotic classic and whether it still holds up today.

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:00

Hey everybody, just wanted to chime in really quickly before the episode gets rolling here. Just wanted to let you all know that the Dropbox is expanding. We have created a YouTube channel. You can now find us at the Dropbox Movie Podcast on YouTube. Feel free to leave a comment, leave a like, or a dislike if you think it's shit. That's always okay too. Thank you all so much for everything that you do, and as always, enjoy the episode. You're listening to the Dropbox. The only podcast where rewinding is optional, and late bees don't apply. Where each episode we chat with guests, dive into a new movie, and probably spoil it. What's going on, everybody? Whether this is your first time listening, or you are a returning listener, it is so great to have you here with us on the Dropbox. So that was awesome. This is this is that was a good one. That was really good. So today we are gonna be talking about none other than Austin Powers and Goldmember. Does that sound good, Carlo? Yeah, baby. So no further introduction is required. We're just gonna get right into it. Groovy. Groovy. Now we're cooking with some fucking peanut oil, boys. Well, the opening credits are rolling, man. What uh why Austin Powers? What brought your interest? I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 1:32

You asked me to come in on the podcast and what will be a movie, and I just threw Goldmember out there for the movie. Yeah, just to see if I wanted you to say no for some reason, but you said yeah about the movie. I'll talk about anything, bro. And I'll watch anything. I just want to see. Yeah, I'll watch anything. Oh, this is tough not the Shaguar. The Shaguar. I wonder if he did all his own stunts in this. How did they get Tom Cruise to agree to this? Even for the five minutes, right? Yeah, seriously. Well, the opening cast is uh it's a dream team. Oh yeah, there you go.

SPEAKER_03 2:14

This is the best movie, dude.

SPEAKER_02 2:17

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:18

This is my shield. This is my second time watching this today.

SPEAKER_02 2:22

Today. Today. Well, I watched it once today, too. This is my second time too. That I can't lie. I can't lie. It's my second time watching it today.

SPEAKER_03 2:29

Really?

SPEAKER_02 2:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:30

We've both, this is our second time watching this today. That's crazy.

SPEAKER_02 2:33

But like my 50th time in total. Really? Yeah. You haven't seen it that many times. You're lying. You are lying.

SPEAKER_03 2:41

What do you think this is the best in the trilogy?

SPEAKER_02 2:43

I think out of the trilogy, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 2:45

Dude, this this is it's like non-stop gags from start up.

SPEAKER_02 2:51

Nonstop daddy issues from finish. Oh yeah. Yeah, baby.

SPEAKER_03 2:58

How did they convince Tom Cruise to do this? Yeah, it's right, and Gwyneth Paltra was Dixie. Dixinormous. Dixinormous. Oh, yeah. How hot is she, dude? Oh, she is, baby. Oh, that aged like a box of moldy cheese, huh?

SPEAKER_02 3:16

Yes, Kevin Spacely. Danny DeVito has mini mini me. The gun is bigger than him.

SPEAKER_03 3:30

Austin Pussy.

SPEAKER_02 3:31

Yeah, baby.

SPEAKER_03 3:32

And they got Steven Spielberg in this bitch.

SPEAKER_02 3:36

Man, this is when it becomes a musical.

SPEAKER_03 3:38

What's that?

SPEAKER_02 3:38

This is when it becomes a musical.

SPEAKER_03 3:40

Oh, dude. The fuck does Shagedelic mean? Shagodelic. What does Shag Adelic mean? Like awesome?

SPEAKER_02 3:48

What is that like? Sexy and awesome? Super sexy awesome. Super sexy awesome.

SPEAKER_03 3:53

You gotta have mojo, babe.

SPEAKER_02 3:56

If you lose it, you've lost it all.

SPEAKER_03 3:58

Remember in the second movie when he lost his mojo. When he's lost his mojo, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 4:03

He couldn't get no honeys.

SPEAKER_03 4:05

This is the best movie.

SPEAKER_02 4:07

We should learn this choreography.

SPEAKER_03 4:08

Oh, Steven Spielberg is not having it. Why is Beyonce in this? How do they convince her to do this?

SPEAKER_02 4:14

That's how they got people to watch.

SPEAKER_03 4:16

How fine is Beyonce.

SPEAKER_02 4:17

Oh, she is sexy.

SPEAKER_03 4:18

Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_02 4:19

There's Murray Poppins. Singing in the Rain. Singing in the Rain.

SPEAKER_03 4:22

Yeah. That's an homage to Singing in the Rain from like 1955 or some shit.

SPEAKER_02 4:27

Austin in a tutu.

SPEAKER_03 4:29

By all accounts, Mike Myers is a dickhead in real life. By all accounts. You ever hear that?

SPEAKER_02 4:34

I heard, yeah, yeah. Oh my god. He's like a like a diva.

SPEAKER_03 4:37

That's what I've heard. Who's Quincy Jones?

SPEAKER_02 4:40

Quincy Jones, one of the greatest producers. He is? The guy with he kissed them. On the cheek. Austin Powers kissed Quincy Jones. On the cheek. Oh, Winnie Spears. Brittany Spears. What year was this movie? Like 2022? 2002. 2002. 2002. And Britney was popping around this time.

SPEAKER_03 5:01

Oh my god. She was on top of the world in 2002. Before she had her public meltdown.

SPEAKER_02 5:06

Oh man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she almost stabbed herself a couple times dancing with a with a knife. Oh god.

SPEAKER_03 5:12

Dancing with a knife. But there was that whole free Britney movement a few years ago. You remember that?

SPEAKER_02 5:18

Yeah, because her daddy had her curve locked up. In a conservatorship.

SPEAKER_03 5:22

Conservatorship? Is it is that how that's said? She's like in her 40s now. Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02 5:26

And she looked like she hurt. What do you mean? In her 60s. She looks like she's old. Now she does? Yeah, I think so. She looks like she had a tough life. We can edit all this out, you know. You don't have to.

SPEAKER_03 5:38

Dude, I don't give a fuck. This is great content.

SPEAKER_02 5:42

Authenticity pays the pills. That's what's up. Oh man. Thank you for the invite, man. This is just breaking the ice for me right here. Isn't this great? I'm about to be your code your co-host.

SPEAKER_03 6:00

Now here we go. Man, finally, Dr. Evil. Let's go. This is the best. Mike Myers plays.

SPEAKER_02 6:08

He just got back, too.

SPEAKER_03 6:10

He plays like four people in this movie. He's he's Austin Powers, he's fat bastard, he's Dr. Evil, and he's gold member. He's gold member. He's four people. He's like the Eddie Murphy of like. He's like Eddie Murphy. He played like white Eddie Murphy. Dude, literally, he is like the white Eddie Murphy. Remember a nutty professor when Eddie Murphy played like the whole family.

SPEAKER_02 6:31

The whole family, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 6:32

Hercules, Hercules, Hercules. I love God.

SPEAKER_02 6:45

He had a smelting accident. The baby fell asleep. You know he's dead. The little guy? Yeah, he's dead, dude. What do you mean the little guy's dead? In real life, he's dead.

SPEAKER_03 6:55

Wasn't he like in like in Game of Thrones the other day? No, dude, he's been dead for like a while. He committed suicide. Really? Yeah, Vern Troyer. He committed suicide. He was too alcohol intoxication. Deliberate suicide from alcohol intoxication.

SPEAKER_02 7:10

He like really got alcohol poisoned.

SPEAKER_03 7:12

Yeah, he was suicide by alcohol poisoning.

SPEAKER_02 7:15

Wow.

SPEAKER_03 7:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:16

He was two foot eight. He was that little.

SPEAKER_03 7:19

He did at what the fuck was it? That concert where like people went savage at Woodstock or something when he introduced Limp Biscuit. Yeah, yeah. His voice was so high pitched and he was like, Limp Biscuit. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 7:35

He likes chocolate. Mitty Me likes chocolate? Yeah. And Scotty don't. Yeah. Yeah. Scotty don't. Scotty don't. There's a kid in our in our job. Every time he comes to the window, I say, Scotty don't. Scotty don't. That's what you say to him? Yeah. Refer into this right here, Scotty don't.

SPEAKER_03 8:00

Scotty don't. Scotty don't.

SPEAKER_02 8:02

Man.

SPEAKER_03 8:03

Should we tell the people how how the fuck we know each other? Yeah, why not? We work together.

SPEAKER_02 8:08

You are co-workers. I am.

SPEAKER_03 8:10

We we are co co-workers-ish.

SPEAKER_02 8:12

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 8:13

Kind of. What do you do, Carlo?

SPEAKER_02 8:15

The chef.

SPEAKER_03 8:16

He's the chef. You don't have to say where you work. It's totally confidential. No, we keep no one knows where I live.

SPEAKER_02 8:22

Do people know what you do?

SPEAKER_03 8:23

No, no one knows what I do. But all they need to know is that we work together.

SPEAKER_02 8:27

Yes, yes, and I'm the chef. Carlo is a cook. Come on, how are you gonna downgrade me like that? When I'm trying to say I'm the chef, are you just gonna chef cook?

SPEAKER_03 8:33

Isn't that like what's the difference?

SPEAKER_02 8:34

I'd rather be a cook than a chef.

SPEAKER_03 8:35

Why?

SPEAKER_02 8:36

Well, the chef has to really manage the kitchen and you ever been like a sous chef? Yeah, yeah, that's what I am right now. That's what I am right now. Like David takes care of all the paperwork and Oh, really?

SPEAKER_03 8:47

That's how that does that's how that goes down.

SPEAKER_02 8:49

I do uh do most of the cooking, the dinner, you know? Serve lunch when he's gotta go take care of the paperwork. I take over the kitchen. How much paperwork is involved? It's a lot, you know. There's payroll, there's inventory. David does all that? Yeah, yeah. David does payroll? David does payroll. David pays me. He does the inventory, he orders, among other things.

SPEAKER_03 9:12

And you just eat and you do all the cooking.

SPEAKER_02 9:14

Not all the cooking, because he does, he does, he leaves me pretty good setup. He does breakfast and lunch.

SPEAKER_03 9:19

I come in, I serve lunch, and I do the You know how to season some motherfuckers, dude. You know how to season that shit. Yes, sir. Yeah, you are. Fuck yeah, you are. Speak speaking, speaking of Puerto Rican.

SPEAKER_02 9:35

You gonna bring it up?

SPEAKER_03 9:35

What do you mean, what am I gonna bring up?

SPEAKER_02 9:37

No, I said, are you gonna bring it up? You're gonna bring it up.

SPEAKER_03 9:39

Super Bowl?

SPEAKER_02 9:40

Yeah, the halftime show. I love the halftime show.

SPEAKER_03 9:43

That was a lot better than I thought it was going to be. I'm gonna be totally honest.

SPEAKER_02 9:46

He had a lot of surprises, yeah. Lady Gaga! Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 9:50

Like Lady Gaga, I that was not on my bingo card. Lady and Ricky Martin came out.

SPEAKER_02 9:54

Ricky Martin. Ricky Martin sang the most important part of the whole message that my brother was trying to deliver.

SPEAKER_03 10:01

I didn't understand any of it. Could you translate it for me?

SPEAKER_02 10:04

Well, Ricky Martin, Bad Bunny has a song in his last album that says that I don't want to happen to Puerto Rico what happened to Hawaii. To what? To Hawaii.

SPEAKER_03 10:16

Like the fires?

SPEAKER_02 10:17

No. Becoming a state. Like it got colonized and became a state.

SPEAKER_03 10:25

He didn't want Puerto Rico to become part of the United States. Is that what I'm understanding?

SPEAKER_02 10:30

No, not.

SPEAKER_03 10:31

No? No, explain it.

SPEAKER_02 10:35

Explain it. Like the history of Hawaii. I don't know. We're gonna get like into history here. We could watch Austin Powers, but we could get into some history. You know, the history of, you know, Hawaii, Guam, not Guam.

SPEAKER_03 10:55

I don't know any of that. You do you know about the history of Hawaii?

SPEAKER_02 11:00

It's similar to the history of Puerto Rico. You know, it it got like sold to the United States and we we've we was a colony, first of all. It's my favorite song. Daddy wasn't there. To take me to the fair. This is where where all the daddy issues begin. Where I noticed them.

SPEAKER_03 11:26

Take me to the fair. When I was so I'm so glad I watched this, bro. This is top notch. Daddy wasn't there. We're about to meet our friends Fuki Me and Fuku.

SPEAKER_02 11:40

And ironically, they say they twins, right? They are twins. They don't look nothing alike. No? No. They're just two Japanese girls, bro. They don't even look alike. They don't even look like sisters. You're lying. Oh shit. Yeah, watch watch. Look at her. Look at her. Now the other Japanese girl comes in. She gotta look a little longer face. Look, they're not twins. Pause it if you want. They're not twins. Turn around.

SPEAKER_03 12:10

Oh my god. What do you mean? They look exactly like.

SPEAKER_02 12:15

They got different noses. Look at their noses. Look at their eyes. The one on the right. Maybe I'm just maybe. It's not because they're smiling, because they're both smiling.

SPEAKER_03 12:23

Maybe I'm just racist and I think all Asian people look alike.

SPEAKER_02 12:28

That's what Steven Spielberg did here.

SPEAKER_03 12:31

What do you mean, Steven Spielberg?

SPEAKER_02 12:33

I don't know. Isn't he the director there?

SPEAKER_03 12:36

Of the in-universe Austin Powers movie.

SPEAKER_02 12:40

I know, I know, I know. He's not the real director. Spielberg wouldn't stoop this slow. He just came out in the movie. Look, right here, you can tell better.

SPEAKER_03 12:47

Yeah, I g I guess they have they have different features.

SPEAKER_02 12:51

This amount, yeah. Is that on your bucket list? What does it say? Threesome with Japanese twins.

SPEAKER_03 12:55

Threesome with Japanese twins? Sure, why not? Is it on your bucket list? I never thought about it. Well, you know. You've been alive longer than me. You ever you ever taken part in a threesome with two Japanese women?

SPEAKER_02 13:09

No, I have never been that fortunate.

SPEAKER_03 13:11

That isn't that is unfortunate.

SPEAKER_02 13:13

Well, you still young, you can probably, you know, put on your bucket list and achieve it.

SPEAKER_03 13:18

I'll have to put it in between writing Yeah, that's how that's the idea to put it in between two Japanese. I gotta put it I'm gonna put a j a threesome with two Japanese women in between riding a jet ski down the Statue of Liberty and getting circumcised by a redneck.

SPEAKER_02 13:42

Well, the jet ski's more possible than all the other ones. I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 13:46

I'll find a redneck and I'll give give it give give it the chop. Dr. Evil. Oh, just the flashback. No, this is when the no, I mean like isn't this scene with the flashback over them at the the British Naval Academy or whatever? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 14:17

It's funny you say that. Cause in this movie there's a scene that Ozzy's like, they're using all the same jokes from the second movie.

SPEAKER_01 14:26

They're doing the same boobs off the book. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Boobs, Aussie.

SPEAKER_02 14:36

Boobs, Aussie. Boobs. Daddy wasn't there.

SPEAKER_03 14:41

Daddy wasn't there to take me to the fair and change my underwear.

SPEAKER_02 14:44

You see how he runs up to the door and it doesn't open now? What? He ran up to the door and smacked it and it didn't open. Loot him run. Yeah how he did that? Yeah. I'll wait a couple minutes. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 15:02

Yeah, baby. Yeah, baby. Yeah. Master evil. Dude, the the the kid who does Dr. Evil here is so good. Yeah, he is.

SPEAKER_01 15:13

What a good impression. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 15:17

His evil laugh. It's so good. Who throws a cupcake?

SPEAKER_03 15:24

Nice to meet you here, too.

SPEAKER_02 15:26

And they got they got a perfect bullseye on his head. Oh, dude, how can you not?

SPEAKER_03 15:30

Why does that this movie have like such a stacked cast? Why is Tom Cruise, Gwyneth Paltrow, Kevin Spacey, Danny DeVito, and Beyonce, and fucking who am I forgetting?

SPEAKER_02 15:45

Michael Cain. But when it came out, you know, it was it was a hit.

SPEAKER_03 15:50

There still is a hit.

SPEAKER_02 15:51

It still is. I've watched it over 50 times, so since it came out, was it over 20 years already? 24 years this year. 24 years. Would you like to see a fourth one? Ah well, the way this one ends, that there should have been one a long time ago.

SPEAKER_03 16:07

Yeah. Wait, you told me to wait.

SPEAKER_02 16:09

Yeah, once he leaves. Once he runs up to the door again.

SPEAKER_03 16:12

Squid Pro Row.

SPEAKER_02 16:14

Pro Row. Mini Me. He loves his Minimi so much.

SPEAKER_01 16:20

It's a hard knock life. For us.

SPEAKER_03 16:25

That's that's super bowl. Watch, look, look, look. That was pretty good. Oh yeah. And it opens right up.

SPEAKER_02 16:35

I never noticed. You never caught that? No. No, sir, Connor. Come on.

SPEAKER_01 16:40

The door to itself just opens up. Oh shit. How does he go back in time? He just hops. He hops around.

SPEAKER_03 17:10

Wait, look.

SPEAKER_01 17:12

Wait, look. The diopad. He just he just enters the year.

SPEAKER_02 17:24

Oh god, I can't breathe. Oh man. 1975. And he just stops hopping around after he presses the red button. His groove suspension in that car.

SPEAKER_03 17:38

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 17:39

Oh man. Was 1975 really like that?

SPEAKER_03 17:42

What year were you born in?

SPEAKER_02 17:43

84.

SPEAKER_03 17:44

Oh, you weren't alive in 75?

SPEAKER_02 17:45

I'm an 80s baby. I'm not that old, Conor.

SPEAKER_03 17:48

You were born in 84?

SPEAKER_02 17:50

84. 1984.

SPEAKER_03 17:53

What are you 38?

SPEAKER_02 17:54

Nice, thank you. You're bad with your math.

SPEAKER_03 17:57

94, 2000 for 20. You're 42?

SPEAKER_02 18:00

Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_03 18:01

Holy fuck.

SPEAKER_02 18:01

Damn, you didn't know that. You finding out now?

SPEAKER_03 18:04

I thought you were 40.

SPEAKER_02 18:06

I'm about to be 42 in November.

SPEAKER_03 18:08

It's your favorite part, huh? Any scene with Beyoncé is just top notch.

SPEAKER_02 18:13

He has a kissing scene with her, too.

SPEAKER_03 18:15

Of course. I knew that. And she sings so good. Her voice is so sexy, dude.

SPEAKER_02 18:22

And she wasn't married yet by this time. She got married in 2008.

SPEAKER_03 18:26

Too bad her husband is about as good looking as a bag of dicks. Shit. We gang like that? What's that? We uh okay. He is an ugly motherfucker. Jay-Z, that's like how does that match up?

SPEAKER_02 18:40

It doesn't, you know?

SPEAKER_03 18:41

Like the pockets match up. I mean, is he worth more than her? He's gotta be worth more than her. Are they both billionaires at this point?

SPEAKER_02 18:51

Yeah, because she hasn't made I don't know. Her last album was Country and Oh, I forgot about that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 19:00

I bonded really I bonded really good with a lady who cut my hair over that album.

SPEAKER_02 19:05

You serious?

SPEAKER_03 19:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:07

What do you mean?

SPEAKER_03 19:08

I last time I got my hair cut. She was cutting my hair, and I had some help by Post Malone and Morgan Walling came on. And we were just chatting and vibing, and I was like, why is it that like everyone lately has gone country? I'm like, Post Malone went country, Beyonce went country, Falling in Reverse went country, Jelly Rolls full country now. Like everyone just went to full country. And she was like, Oh yeah, I'm rather die with Beyonce though. I love all things black. And I'm like, oh no doubt, no doubt. Oh shit. And I was like, no, yeah, no, I was like, no doubt, no doubt. I just love the fact. What did I say? I was like, I think it's bullshit the fact that she won country album of music album of the year over Chris Stapleton.

SPEAKER_02 19:50

No, that's it.

SPEAKER_03 19:51

Like that was cra that was crazy to me. Yeah. And uh that's not me d diminishing what Beyonce has done. Like, she's great, she's iconic, she's the fucking queen bee. But she come on, her first country album beats Chris Stapleton. Nah, nah. Nah. That was that is kind of crazy. That was BS to me. Oh, there you go. Nathan Lane. Diving Turkey. Foxy cleaner. Oh, you said the man what name was? Nathan Lane. Nathan Lynn. He he that guy, you ever seen The Lion King? Yeah. He's the voice of Timone, the Meerkat. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, but he doesn't talk here. He's just mouthing what Beyonce is saying. Wasn't he in the movie where Robin Williams was in the city? He was in the birdcage. The birdcage. He was in the birdcage with Robin Williams.

SPEAKER_02 20:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 20:34

Did you ever see the OJ Simpson show on FX with Cuba Gooding?

SPEAKER_02 20:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 20:39

He was on the Dream Team. He was one of the lawyers. He acted his ass off in the OJ show. That was good all around.

SPEAKER_02 20:48

I didn't watch too much of it.

SPEAKER_03 20:49

I just two or three times, bro.

SPEAKER_02 20:53

Really? The whole thing? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 20:55

It's that good. Cuba Gooding is great. Because he plays OJ and he's great, and they leave it deliberately ambiguous. And what is this on? It's on Hulu. On Hulu. I believe it's on Hulu. But Sarah Paulson was Who was the lady that was trying to prosecute OJ? Marsha Clark and the guy that played Johnny Cochrane was fucking great. David Schwimmer played Robert Kardashian. Just top-notch. Everyone was great. Okay, okay. Oh yeah. I gotta look into that. The people versus OJ Simpson. American crime story. It's like an eight-episode miniseries. That's the one with John Travolta in it? Yep, yep, yep. He played, he played um who the fuck did he play? Play one of those Bob Shapiro. He played Bob Shapiro. He was great. Oh, he was real good. He had makeup on and shit, right? Yeah, oh yeah, a whole lot of makeup. Oh, dude.

SPEAKER_02 21:51

He took a viagma. I stuck in my neck. English people really talk like that.

SPEAKER_03 21:59

Maybe famous. British people. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:03

She sat on a turtle. She sat or shot.

SPEAKER_03 22:07

Shat on a turtle.

SPEAKER_02 22:08

She shedded on a turtle.

SPEAKER_03 22:11

She's filing his nails. I never noticed that either.

SPEAKER_02 22:13

Oh, we missed him skating. When he lifts his yeah, roller skating. When he lifts his legs over his his head. The smell of it. The taste of it. He said we're both swingers. You got a top body. You both stringers. A cigar and a waffle. Pipe and a crepe.

SPEAKER_03 22:37

Bong and a blinch.

SPEAKER_02 22:38

I would like a bong and a blinch.

SPEAKER_03 22:39

That would be pretty nice.

SPEAKER_02 22:40

That is so nasty.

SPEAKER_03 22:42

What is it? Skin?

SPEAKER_02 22:43

Yeah, he peels his skin and eats it. Oh, he saves it. In the Dutch. Dutch. That's racist.

SPEAKER_03 22:57

It's funny though.

SPEAKER_02 22:58

I like the way he jumps into the time machine.

SPEAKER_03 23:00

We're under arrest.

SPEAKER_02 23:00

Sugar. Dive turkey.

SPEAKER_03 23:02

It's weird, but like Beyoncé's voice works so well for the part. I can't explain it. Like her voice makes it funnier. Like it works with like the silliness of Austin Powers.

SPEAKER_02 23:15

And the lingo they make her make her say, yeah. I didn't know the time machine could drive.

SPEAKER_03 23:24

That's great. Dude, you ever seen Scooby-Doo Monsters Unleashed?

SPEAKER_02 23:29

I remember seeing it, but I don't remember the movie. We're gonna have to review that one too. Dude, we're gonna have to review it. Scooby-Doo 2. Super high. Dude.

SPEAKER_03 23:41

Oh, yeah. There you go. Get you some of that, man.

SPEAKER_02 23:44

Oh, this is the best part. Scotty does. He went from Scotty too. He's like a proud father. Would you smash? And my wife is gonna be watching this. Your what your wife knows you're here? She knows I'm here recording with you, yeah. Podcast, so she's gonna be like, let's see what you said.

SPEAKER_03 24:02

Show dude, show her the movie and she'll understand it was a joke. Take what one look at that lady and go, oh god.

SPEAKER_02 24:09

No, I wouldn't. Uh, you're you're a loyal man. These are the people that made him evil. Look at his uh his bandana. I know. He's gangster. That's his baby mama. I was just rather died.

SPEAKER_03 24:22

She was on the Disney Channel in Nickelodeon.

SPEAKER_02 24:24

She was.

SPEAKER_03 24:25

She played the principle? No. She played the principal on iCarly. And she played the other principal on Ant Farm. Really? Yeah. Ant Farm. Ant Farm was on the Disney Channel in like 2011. I was in like the fifth grade. What year were you born in? 2000. 2000. 2000. 2000. Brandon Millennium, baby. My first birthday was the day after 9-11, if you can believe it. So September? September 12th.

SPEAKER_02 25:00

My brother's birthday, September 18th. Yeah? Yeah. He's 89 though.

SPEAKER_03 25:06

Your brother's 89.

SPEAKER_02 25:08

No, no, he's the year he was born in. 89. 89. Tim Mother Fizzle.

SPEAKER_03 25:19

This is the best movie.

SPEAKER_02 25:22

Right, right. You see what I told you? Oh. You see? And high as fuck. Oh man. This is the best.

SPEAKER_03 25:29

Stick that in your piping spookage.

SPEAKER_02 25:31

Yeah. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 25:40

Oh.

SPEAKER_02 25:41

Oh, he's just like the flavor flav.

SPEAKER_03 25:45

Where did those where did the woman come from?

SPEAKER_02 25:46

Where'd they get those ladies? Those are the beaches. Beaches? Be biatches. Put a mop on their head, right? Oh, that's right. And they become biatches.

SPEAKER_03 25:57

Dr. Evil is escaping from prison. And then they maybe.

SPEAKER_02 26:02

On the motorcycle.

SPEAKER_03 26:04

There's someone at work right now. I'm not going to say any names, but there's someone at work who is not a native English speaker. And we have been gradually filling him in on like American English lingo. And he had heard the word midget for the first time. He had never heard the word midget, and he was like, What does midget mean? And I was like, it's like slang for someone with dwarfism. And he's like, Midget, midget, midget, midget, midget, midget, midget, midget. He also heard it was the funniest thing.

SPEAKER_02 26:34

He also heard the word poopoo platter. Oh, dude, yeah. And he almost poopoo himself. When he heard poopoo platter? When he heard poopoo platter. And that it was something people eat.

SPEAKER_03 26:45

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_02 26:46

He shitted himself.

SPEAKER_03 26:48

Do they not have Chinese food in Venezuela?

SPEAKER_02 26:50

I don't know.

SPEAKER_03 26:51

Have you ever been to Venezuela?

SPEAKER_02 26:52

I'm Puerto Rican.

SPEAKER_03 26:54

That doesn't mean you've never been to Venezuela. Have you ever been to Puerto Rico?

SPEAKER_02 26:58

Yeah, yeah, I've been to Puerto Rico.

SPEAKER_03 26:59

Were you born in Puerto Rico?

SPEAKER_02 27:00

I was born in Puerto Rico.

SPEAKER_03 27:01

You really were born in Puerto Rico? No shit. Where about?

SPEAKER_02 27:05

Ganoana.

SPEAKER_03 27:06

Really? Yeah. That's sick. That's sick. You know where I was born, Carlo?

SPEAKER_02 27:11

Where? In Stowe. Stowe. I don't know. Somewhere over there by Worcester.

SPEAKER_03 27:17

Brother, I was born in Framingaham.

SPEAKER_02 27:21

Framingah. Flamingham. You see, I knew you was in Worcester County, boy.

SPEAKER_03 27:25

I was, dude, I've the furthest I've ever been is Florida. I've never left the country.

SPEAKER_02 27:31

And everybody that vacations go from your area goes to Florida.

SPEAKER_03 27:36

Pretty much.

SPEAKER_02 27:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 27:37

I don't know if I'd want to leave the country now with how fucking polarized everything is.

SPEAKER_02 27:41

Well, Puerto Rico, you don't have to leave the country.

SPEAKER_03 27:43

Oh yeah, that's part, yeah. That's central Central America, though.

SPEAKER_02 27:48

Centrally America. That's what you want to say, right? Centrally United States. Because America's the whole both of the continents.

SPEAKER_03 27:56

It's called like Puerto Rico, Cuba, that whole area. That's the Caribbean. It's called it's I thought it was just nationally referred to as Central America.

SPEAKER_02 28:06

Central America is El Salvador, Guatemala.

SPEAKER_03 28:09

Oh, am I mistaken?

SPEAKER_02 28:10

Yeah. Oh, okay. Mexico and further down towards South America.

SPEAKER_03 28:17

Oh, really?

SPEAKER_02 28:18

Panama.

SPEAKER_03 28:19

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 28:20

That's Central America.

SPEAKER_03 28:21

Oh, I learned something new. So Puerto Rico isn't a part of Central America.

SPEAKER_02 28:25

Yeah. No. No, it's part of United States of America. But it's I did.

SPEAKER_03 28:37

Oh, wait, look at this.

SPEAKER_02 28:39

Well, I guess you can say it's part of Central America. Yeah, it's the Caribbean.

SPEAKER_03 28:44

He farted. Look at his little how he flopping Finns. We look look at his face. It's the best. No, I I all my life I've been operating under the illusion that Puerto Rico was like a central part of Central America.

unknown 29:02

Huh.

SPEAKER_02 29:03

Well, geographically, I guess it is in the Central America area. You know?

SPEAKER_03 29:12

Interesting. I didn't do that. I'm learning so much geography from you.

SPEAKER_02 29:16

I like geography a little bit.

SPEAKER_03 29:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 29:18

Yeah. I like local geography. Local geo. Well, you haven't never never left the states. You have never left the 49 49 states. 48. 48 states.

SPEAKER_03 29:32

There's 50.

SPEAKER_02 29:34

Right?

SPEAKER_03 29:35

You said 48.

SPEAKER_02 29:37

Yeah. Cause two of those states are not on the same. Oh, wait, like what?

SPEAKER_03 29:43

Hawaii is in the touch?

SPEAKER_02 29:45

And oh, and Alaska's. We're really learning about geography tonight.

SPEAKER_03 29:52

Dude, Alaska's up at like the tip of Canada.

SPEAKER_02 29:56

Yes. You think Trump is gonna buy Greenland? Well, Drump can do whatever he wants nowadays. Oh god. He took over Venezuela, so yeah.

SPEAKER_03 30:06

Oh, dude. I was talking to my sister like a week ago, and I I just proposed the question. I was like, uh since when are we allowed to like bomb foreign countries and kidnap their leaders? I know that he's being accused of some heinous shit, but it just seems the way that they went about it, about executing it, was just kind of not the best.

SPEAKER_02 30:36

What did your sister think?

SPEAKER_03 30:37

She agreed. She agreed. I I was just like, wow, I didn't realize we had the power to do that. I don't know. That just seemed crazy to me.

SPEAKER_02 30:47

Yeah, it is kind of crazy. It is kind of crazy, but hey, they did it to Puerto Rico.

SPEAKER_03 30:52

When did they do that to Puerto Rico?

SPEAKER_02 30:53

In nine in 1898.

SPEAKER_03 30:56

Oh wow. The United States did that?

SPEAKER_02 30:59

Yes, sir. First we were a part of Spain, and then the United States came in with the Spanish and American War and the Jones Act. It's called the Join Act. Okay. They acquired Puerto Rico, Guam, and the Virgin Islands, I believe. Who was in the White House in 1898? You got me there. I look it up. Look that up. Who was the president in 1918?

SPEAKER_03 31:32

Yeah. Who was in the White House? William McKinley. William McKinley was the president of the United States. I don't know, just leaving the country right now, just I feel like I feel like everyone thinks we're idiots. I feel like everyone is laughing at us. Like low-key. I feel like the world is laughing at us.

SPEAKER_02 31:58

Low-key?

SPEAKER_03 31:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:00

I might be wrong on my facts, so you know you can't really like quote me on this shit. No, like your word isn't golden, but I mean I you know more than I do, so I have no reason to miss. I wasn't ready to come on here and talk history and stuff.

SPEAKER_03 32:13

No, that's that's that's okay. It's just we're just we're just riffing here, brother.

SPEAKER_02 32:17

Alright, alright. Once we get no backlash over this, like, you know, I don't know what he's talking about.

SPEAKER_03 32:24

No, fuck that shit. Dude, then that's their problem. We're not journalists.

SPEAKER_02 32:29

No, no, no, we're not.

SPEAKER_03 32:30

We're just two dudes chilling watching Austin Powers. Exactly. We have no journalistic integrity here.

SPEAKER_02 32:37

So what made you want to start doing this?

SPEAKER_03 32:39

So it was someone at work about a year ago, and he had a podcast, and I asked him, I was like, Oh, by any chance, can you make money doing this? And he was like, Yeah, yeah, you you can. And I was like, Oh, I'm not doing this to make money, I'm doing it as a hobby, and I I love m filming TV, it's always been just a passion of mine, and now I'm literally able to do it as like a hobby that can potentially pay me money.

SPEAKER_02 33:10

Filming TV. I always wanted to get into doing videos and shit.

SPEAKER_03 33:15

I remember being like six years old going to Walmart and just begging my mom to let me buy buy her let I wanted a movie, Carlo.

SPEAKER_00 33:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 33:25

Wanted a movie. I wanted a movie, and I was like, buy me a movie, buy me a movie, and she went, buy me a movie. I've always loved it.

SPEAKER_02 33:36

Movies is the shit.

SPEAKER_03 33:38

It's I feel like it's the best storytelling art form. Like, where else could we see something this ridiculous? Only in the movies. Only in the movies. Yeah, look at how bad this green screen is. Look at this. It's awful. I've never noticed that. You never did, dude. I noticed that immediately. Oh my god, bro. The first time I watched this, I was like, that is awful.

SPEAKER_02 34:12

I pick up on shit like that. I probably doze off, usually doze off during that part or something, because that's some shit.

SPEAKER_03 34:19

I love how we was literally doing just a Shrek voice for fat bastard.

SPEAKER_02 34:24

Shrek voice. I didn't even notice that.

SPEAKER_03 34:28

That's literally a Shrek voice. Hey, donkey!

SPEAKER_01 34:34

Donkey!

SPEAKER_03 34:35

You know my favorite Helen Hunt movie? Twister!

SPEAKER_02 34:40

Fat bastard. He's the Yokosuna. Yokosuna means grand champion, too.

SPEAKER_03 34:49

His whole character is just poop humor.

SPEAKER_02 34:53

Poop. And he's singing a pizza song.

SPEAKER_03 34:57

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 34:59

Yeah? That's how you feel?

SPEAKER_03 35:00

She she is beautiful.

SPEAKER_02 35:05

I think you gotta type, Connor.

SPEAKER_03 35:08

Oh, uh you wanna know my type?

SPEAKER_02 35:10

I I think I see your type.

SPEAKER_03 35:11

Like like brown.

SPEAKER_02 35:13

Yeah, like Beyonce Brown.

SPEAKER_03 35:15

Specifically, like specifically, like caramel.

SPEAKER_02 35:22

Yeah? You gotta be caramel. Okay, okay. Connor. Okay. Kana likes some flavor.

SPEAKER_03 35:30

My first, well, my first girlfriend was Puerto Rican. Okay. We dated for three and a half years.

SPEAKER_02 35:35

And this was in Framingham?

SPEAKER_03 35:37

No, no, no. Uh when I before I moved out of my mom's house when I lived in Worcester County.

SPEAKER_02 35:43

Worcester County. Yeah. Framingham is Worcester County, just saying.

SPEAKER_03 35:46

I don't think it is. I don't think Framingham is in Worcester County.

SPEAKER_02 35:49

It is.

SPEAKER_03 35:50

Very small town with like 2,000 people.

SPEAKER_02 35:52

Google it.

SPEAKER_03 35:53

What?

SPEAKER_02 35:54

Is Framingham in Worcester County?

SPEAKER_03 35:57

No, it's in Middlesex County.

SPEAKER_02 35:59

Middlesex?

SPEAKER_03 36:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 36:01

Oh, so you're gonna enter that out.

SPEAKER_03 36:04

Maybe. I don't know. There's a lot of people in this state. Matitties!

SPEAKER_02 36:14

So he's fighting himself in this? Yeah. This was cool.

SPEAKER_03 36:18

Good you knew! I can't do a Scottish accent.

SPEAKER_02 36:24

Steps on them and they're all square fat bastard flying through the air.

SPEAKER_03 36:28

You're gonna see Shrek 5 when it comes out?

SPEAKER_02 36:30

Shrek 5? I don't even know it was a little bit more.

SPEAKER_03 36:32

Yeah, you never you didn't see the trailer for Shrek 5? No.

SPEAKER_02 36:36

Have you seen the trailer to Mario Galaxy?

SPEAKER_03 36:39

Yeah, dude. You gonna see that shit?

SPEAKER_02 36:41

Yes, I'm gonna see that shit.

SPEAKER_03 36:42

Wait, you have a Nintendo Switch?

SPEAKER_02 36:44

Yes, sir.

SPEAKER_03 36:44

You a big Mario fan?

SPEAKER_02 36:46

I am a Mario fan.

SPEAKER_03 36:47

Very I I fuck with Nintendo.

SPEAKER_02 36:50

Yeah, yeah. Grew up on Nintendo. Nintendo Super Nintendo.

SPEAKER_03 36:56

I played like the very first Mario Kart when I went home for the holidays. That shit is wild. Like this last one? The most recent Mario Kart? No, no, like the very first ever from like 2006 or something.

SPEAKER_02 37:13

Yeah, from the Super Nintendo, I think it was.

SPEAKER_03 37:15

From like the first ever Nintendo Wii. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:18

That's not the first Mario Kart.

SPEAKER_03 37:20

When was the first Mario Kart?

SPEAKER_02 37:22

Let me get my facts right.

SPEAKER_03 37:26

Fat bastard just shit his pants.

SPEAKER_02 37:29

92 and Super Nintendo.

SPEAKER_03 37:31

The first Mario Kart came out in 1992. And the Super Nintendo. Oh my god. Wow. I played the one from like 2006.

SPEAKER_02 37:45

And you think that's old. I played the one from 1992.

SPEAKER_03 37:51

1992 wasn't that that's not too long before I was born.

SPEAKER_02 37:54

Yeah, before you was born.

SPEAKER_03 37:56

Dude, most shit was before I was born. I never lived through the 90s, bro.

SPEAKER_02 38:00

Yeah, no, you was born after. Dr. Evil. Scotty, don't whoa, Scotty's gonna bow. I love when she screams in all the movies when she opened the tank, lowered the missile, or fucking lower the globe and it falls on his head.

SPEAKER_03 38:23

Are those sharks with freaking laser beams attached to their frickin' heads?

SPEAKER_02 38:28

The best evil son ever. Who you think about self-green in this?

SPEAKER_03 38:34

All I hear is Chris Griffin.

SPEAKER_02 38:35

Chris Griffin.

SPEAKER_03 38:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 38:39

Well, I see the little kid from Scream. Scream?

SPEAKER_03 38:44

Wasn't he like in the first Scream? No, he wasn't in Scream. He was in the It with the with the clown in like 1990 with Tim Curry. Yeah. You remember that? How young he was in that? Yeah, look at how young he was in it.

SPEAKER_02 39:00

Yeah, yeah, yeah. He was so young. Oh, scary movie.

SPEAKER_03 39:05

Seth Green was in Scary Movie. Scary movie. You know they're making another one? They'll bring it back. The Wayans are coming back to do it. Well, what was that? Scary movie, the new scary movie movie? Oh, yes, like Sarry Movie 7. Something like that. The Wayans are coming. The Wayin brothers are coming back to do it.

SPEAKER_02 39:23

Okay, okay. Oh no, I'm thinking Scream. My bad. I'm thinking Scream.

SPEAKER_03 39:27

Sorry, sorry. Seth Green wasn't in Scream. In Scream. No. I don't think Seth Green was in Scream. I'm getting all my shit fucked up. Dude, look at how bad the green screen is, Carlo. Wait. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 39:43

They're on the bridge.

SPEAKER_03 39:47

It's so bad.

SPEAKER_02 39:49

You know, I just realized something now that you said it.

SPEAKER_03 39:52

What is it?

SPEAKER_02 39:53

Seth Green. And who's the other green guy that who's the other Seth that does Seth McFarlane? McFarlane. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 40:03

Yeah, they're they both are on family.

SPEAKER_02 40:05

Yeah, I always confuse those two. That's what's going on.

SPEAKER_03 40:07

That's what happened. Okay. Yeah, no. Seth Green is Chris Griffin. And Seth McFarlane, he does Peter Griffin, he does Brian, he does Quagmire and Stewie. Okay, okay. He does all four of those. Giggity.

SPEAKER_02 40:35

You a Quagmire fan?

SPEAKER_03 40:37

He's funny. A pervert, but he's funny. Hardcore dude.

SPEAKER_02 40:48

His dad is the transvestite. Remember that episode?

SPEAKER_03 40:56

Quagmire's dad is trans.

SPEAKER_02 40:59

Didn't he almost bang him? Brian did. Brian. Brian.

SPEAKER_03 41:03

Brian. When when Brian found out that Quagmire's dad was transgender, he puked for like a minute straight. It was it was very funny.

SPEAKER_02 41:14

Yo, your family guy friends. Dude, the cutaways are so funny.

SPEAKER_03 41:20

It's such lazy humor, though. It's like, oh gee, I oh gee, I remember this nervous since I was like, uh I remember this nervous since I saw Goodwill Hunting with Paul Schreiner. That's stupid. I saw one the other day. It was like it was like, oh god, I haven't been this scared since I was Matt Damon's neck. And then it's so stupid, it's like, hey Matt, hey Matt, are you gonna do another movie when you pay a wet another well-educated Boston street tough? And he's like, hey, shut up, you! He's like, what are you gonna do? Choke me? I'm your neck. I'm your neck, you'll die. It's so stupid.

SPEAKER_02 42:11

That is crazy. Oh man.

SPEAKER_03 42:14

This sucks worse than Easter Sunday or Richard Keys. That's what they say.

SPEAKER_02 42:22

I would like to be your co-host. You want to be my co-host. Yes.

SPEAKER_03 42:27

Well, you gotta do this at least at least once a week. Dude, I don't know if I can do this once a week, but if you want to come on frequently, we can totally do that. Shit, hell yeah. You can totally do that. It'll give me a reason to make episodes. Yeah, yeah. Well, because I recorded another episode earlier today that I'm gonna have out soon, and I'm recording another one on Saturday. What do you recorded earlier? I'm recording an episode with uh two uh two friends of mine on Saturday. And I recorded an episode another episode today, and I'll leave it a surprise as to what it is. I'll let you see it when it comes out. It's a surprise. Okay, okay. It's a shocker. Does it have to be movies or to can it be current events? I mean, I'd like to start off with a movie and we can lead into current events. Like I'll give you an example. Like I had a friend that wanted to talk about the NBA gambling scandal. Okay. And I said, okay, we can lead in with Space Jam. Space Jam? Yeah. It was UBC Space Jam? Yeah. Yeah. And then we'll be like we'll we'll talk about Space Jam and then why why do you like basketball and the gambling scandal and all that? Okay, okay.

SPEAKER_02 43:38

So you guys reviewed Space Jam.

SPEAKER_03 43:44

Stay tuned. Space Jam is coming up. Space Jam. It looks like a dick.

SPEAKER_02 43:50

What and two small little balls.

SPEAKER_03 43:52

Two small little balls.

SPEAKER_02 43:55

That's his gold, member.

SPEAKER_03 43:57

What does this car look like? Why does Beyonce? Walk around and like abra this whole movie. And I'm not com I'm not complaining, but like never noticed. I didn't. Wait a minute. I I I did is what I meant to say.

SPEAKER_02 44:17

Like the whole movie? I don't have to pay attention now. Almost the whole movie, yeah. Earlier he smacked Dr. Evil's wife's butt when she walked by. And now he's hitting on the Austin Powers girl. Nigel Powers. So he's hitting on both his kids. Well, sorry, Ruan. Spoiler.

SPEAKER_03 44:36

Spoiler alert.

SPEAKER_02 44:37

Both his kids' girlfriends.

SPEAKER_03 44:38

Yeah, Nigel Powers is perfect on everyone.

SPEAKER_02 44:41

Look at the little cars. What do they look like? Little peepees. What do the cars look like? Like little sperms? What the fuck? They do? Turn the Yeah, look. What's them little cars look like? What are they? This part's fucking stupid. Oh shit. Who is that?

SPEAKER_03 45:09

That's so good.

SPEAKER_02 45:11

He got preparation H in his rear. You know what preparation H is? What's preparation H? What's that? Heroin? No. What is it? It's like hemorrhoid cream or something. Hemorrho cream. That you put on people's butt and stuff. You serious? You don't know what that is? No?

SPEAKER_03 45:32

I didn't know preparation H was referring to hemorrhoid cream. I never knew that.

SPEAKER_02 45:36

You know he's got a a submarine full of semen, right? Dr. Evil? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 45:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 45:44

He's got a submarine full of semen.

SPEAKER_03 45:46

Bro, that that that joke, I heard that joke in middle school, bro. Oh yeah. Bro, what's long hard and full of semen? A submarine.

SPEAKER_02 45:55

Well, you was in middle school like in 2015. The year before. 14.

SPEAKER_03 46:03

What year were you in middle school?

SPEAKER_02 46:05

99, 98, 99.

SPEAKER_03 46:07

That was when you were in middle school? Yeah. What was middle school like in the 90s?

SPEAKER_01 46:12

You stupid.

SPEAKER_02 46:16

The same?

SPEAKER_01 46:17

The same? Yeah, I don't get it. Yeah, the same.

SPEAKER_02 46:22

Cutting class, fighting. I don't know. Did you play in your Ataris? Uh Atari, no. I was some Super Nintendo mode at that time. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 46:32

That's Shag Italic, man.

SPEAKER_02 46:34

Yeah, groovy, baby.

SPEAKER_03 46:36

Yo, he kicks the shit out of him. Minnie Me doesn't talk at all. He doesn't say a word.

SPEAKER_02 46:44

He makes noises. He writes a couple of letters. He hits them with mash shit. He fucks them up.

SPEAKER_03 46:51

Puts him in a pillow. In a sack?

SPEAKER_02 46:53

That's like what a pillow sack? It's a pillowcase. In a pillowcase.

SPEAKER_03 46:56

You remember the pillow sack race of 2004?

SPEAKER_02 46:59

Yeah, no. I remember the pillow of the sack races, but. Of 2004? No, what was so special of it? Were you in it?

SPEAKER_03 47:07

Dude, I wish I was. The Pillow Sack race of 2004 was a tradition. What? Explain. I don't understand. I'm pulling shit out of my ass. I don't know. I don't have any direction with what I'm saying. 2004. Okay. Yeah. Should I Google it? Sure, see what comes up. The Pelo Sack race of 2004.

SPEAKER_02 47:28

Pillow sack race.

SPEAKER_03 47:30

I know a potato sack race. Oh, the potato you would fit in a potato sack rather better than you would in a pillowcase.

SPEAKER_02 47:37

I'm not mini me size. He's Shagadalic.

SPEAKER_03 47:42

Oh my god.

SPEAKER_02 47:44

Now he's mini af any what is it? Mini Austin?

SPEAKER_03 47:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 47:50

He's a when we first see him talk. Does that count as lines in the movie? Writing them?

SPEAKER_03 47:57

I mean, uh uh it's not it's not verbal, but I guess. You gotta get paid for for that, right? Yeah, of course. He got paid.

SPEAKER_02 48:07

Would you like one? Yeah. Connor's asking the same thing. Dude, uh dude, Foxy.

SPEAKER_03 48:16

The things I would want Beyonce to do to me. Fiona Foxy Cleopatra? Foxy. One million billion can dollars.

SPEAKER_02 48:29

Cold fusion. And the shade the the tractor beam comes out of his ass.

SPEAKER_03 48:37

It's a freaking space laser.

SPEAKER_02 48:42

Like boobs.

SPEAKER_03 48:46

Titans, yeah!

SPEAKER_02 48:48

Big juicy melons.

SPEAKER_03 48:50

Titans, yeah!

SPEAKER_02 48:52

Oh, this is your favorite part, right? As you were saying.

SPEAKER_03 48:54

Yeah, that's the best.

SPEAKER_02 48:56

Rest in peace, Ozzy.

SPEAKER_03 48:58

Rip Ozzy Osborne. Boobs, Ozzy.

SPEAKER_02 49:04

Where did the satellite the boob satellite go? I don't know. It just disappeared.

SPEAKER_03 49:08

Oh no, the the car is on the bottom of Dr. Evil's ship.

SPEAKER_02 49:12

I didn't know they made a wet suit that small.

SPEAKER_03 49:15

Me neither. With a tank and everything.

SPEAKER_02 49:18

Oh oh oh.

SPEAKER_03 49:22

That's so funny.

SPEAKER_02 49:24

Oh, here we go. Cool. Is it a different color or the same?

SPEAKER_03 49:29

No. She was she's just wearing an orange one now. She's wearing a green bra, now she's wearing an orange bra.

SPEAKER_02 49:36

I axes. I know you would notice. I know you you're paying attention.

SPEAKER_03 49:40

Of course. Like you're not. Shut up. Dude, any man on this any man on this earth would not pass up the opportunity to look at Beyonce's boobs. What are you mad?

SPEAKER_02 49:58

He went bald real quick.

SPEAKER_03 50:00

This is like the best character arc I've seen in a movie since Michael Corleone and The Godfather.

SPEAKER_02 50:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 50:07

Is that top grade?

SPEAKER_02 50:10

Top notch. Yeah, dude.

SPEAKER_03 50:12

You get it, you get it.

SPEAKER_02 50:13

Top notch, man. The tiny legs. That is the one of the best parts of this movie. What was that? Apple cider vinegar?

SPEAKER_03 50:24

Apple juice. Oh, apple juice. You really got a problem, buddy. But I see if you see a physician, that is disgusting.

SPEAKER_02 50:36

He put his face on his hand on his face. This is fucking cool if Minnie Me was really carrying Austin Powers. Hey man. Right? Minnie me.

SPEAKER_03 50:45

Minnie Me's is the G for that one. Minnie Me's a stud. Think so? Yeah. Look at him.

SPEAKER_02 50:56

He's like a little pony. What was the glove for? I didn't get the glove part.

SPEAKER_03 51:02

I don't know. I think it's just to add to the ridiculousness of the fact that it looks like Minnie Me's hand is Austin Powers schlong. Wiener. His water broke. He's having a baby. Oh.

SPEAKER_02 51:16

Austin Powers is giving birth. This is fucking crazy.

SPEAKER_03 51:24

There goes Mini Mee.

SPEAKER_02 51:25

And he falls right in her lap. Well, little man. He a great little man. Oh, baby mama. You see baby mama?

SPEAKER_03 51:36

Dr. Evil's baby mama.

SPEAKER_02 51:38

Yeah, that's really his right hand. She's been with him since what? 1960-75?

SPEAKER_03 51:44

Really?

SPEAKER_02 51:44

Yeah, when he was locked up when they went back in time, remember?

SPEAKER_03 51:47

Which one did they do that? When they had Scotty. Was that Shagged Me?

SPEAKER_02 51:51

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 51:52

Oh, I haven't finished that one yet.

SPEAKER_02 51:54

No. Oh man. What's going on here? What's going on? Oh. He's not gonna let him shoot him. What do you mean, your son? Plot twist. Dougie!

SPEAKER_03 52:04

Dougie?

SPEAKER_02 52:06

Ugh. Scotty's his grandson.

SPEAKER_03 52:10

The car just exploded. What a young Michael Cain.

SPEAKER_02 52:14

It's his best days. Doesn't like the Dutch.

SPEAKER_03 52:17

They share a border with the Dutch.

SPEAKER_02 52:19

He don't like the Dutch.

SPEAKER_03 52:20

What a weird demographic of people to be racist towards. The Dutch? Like, what the fuck?

SPEAKER_02 52:28

That's a white race, right?

SPEAKER_03 52:29

Like, right? Yeah. People from the Netherlands, dude. You don't get much whiter than the Netherlands. I'm serious, bro. You don't get much. Maybe, maybe maybe Sweden. But you don't get much whiter than the Netherlands, bro.

SPEAKER_02 52:45

He's a brother. Just like that.

SPEAKER_03 52:48

He forgives them.

SPEAKER_02 52:49

Well, I think they're twins. You think they're twins? I think. I don't know. They have the same mother and father.

SPEAKER_03 52:57

Hey, some twins look nothing alike. No. Look at my sister and I. Oh shit. How ironic. Yeah, yes, I have a twin sister. Yes, we look nothing alike. That's a good thing. Yeah, for her. I hope she don't hear this. What's that? I hope she don't hear this. I don't give a fuck if she does. She'd think it was funny if she heard it.

SPEAKER_02 53:26

Yeah, baby. That's your uncle saying it to you. Like he hates his whole family right now.

SPEAKER_03 53:31

What a villainark.

SPEAKER_02 53:32

Is Minnie Me like his little brother?

SPEAKER_03 53:34

I have no idea. I don't think Minnie Me is Dr. Evil's son. Is he?

SPEAKER_02 53:46

No. How did A clone, so the little clone that would be That's what he is?

SPEAKER_03 53:50

He's a clone of Dr. Evil?

SPEAKER_02 53:52

Yeah, so that's like his little daddy.

SPEAKER_03 53:54

Maybe. Gonna dive in and get it.

SPEAKER_02 53:57

He's got a second key. That spare key. His dog!

SPEAKER_01 54:04

My vinky was a key. My vinky.

SPEAKER_02 54:09

His vinky was the key.

SPEAKER_03 54:12

See how flexible he is with his legs? Oh my god. You can put his legs behind his head.

SPEAKER_02 54:17

The tractor beam. Coming out his ass. What? It says Diddy on his ass. I never noticed that. You see that shit?

SPEAKER_03 54:25

Dr. Evil has a tattoo of Diddy. That says Diddy on his ass. No shit. What the fuck? That aged like a pack of moldycraft mac and cheese. What the fuck? Wow. Hey man, it's 2002. Diddy wasn't a pervert in 2002. At least that that we knew of. Wow.

SPEAKER_02 54:49

Well, now in 2006, we do. 26, 2026, now we do. 24 years later. Wow.

SPEAKER_03 54:58

Even back then there were signs, you see? In 2002, yeah. There were signs that Diddy was a Diddy like booty. That Diddy Diddy had a cum dungeon in 2002. He got motherfuckers tattooing their name in his ass. Dr. Evil went to the Diddy parties. He is wearing white. The white parties. Oh shit. You're under rest, sugar. That's John Travolta. Tremorkin a pancake.

SPEAKER_02 55:29

John Travolta has gold manbo. That would have been a great movie. Tom Cruise has Austin Powers.

SPEAKER_03 55:36

Seriously.

SPEAKER_02 55:37

Tom Cruise, right? That would have been a cast.

SPEAKER_03 55:41

Yeah, Tom Cruise, Gwendeth Paltrow.

SPEAKER_02 55:44

What? Kevin Space. Kevin Spacely.

SPEAKER_03 55:47

Danny DeVito.

SPEAKER_02 55:49

That would have been good. That's good.

SPEAKER_03 55:53

Fab Bastard. I went on the subway diet.

SPEAKER_02 55:56

The Jarrett diet. Just like Jarrett. Hey, that's the consequence, right? You're losing weight. Your neck looking like a vagina.

SPEAKER_03 56:03

Hey man. All that excess skin, you gotta get surgery to get it off.

SPEAKER_02 56:07

Clip that shit off, huh?

SPEAKER_03 56:09

Seriously, was just get some scissors and just clip it.

SPEAKER_02 56:11

What was that episode that I think Peter Griffin, like, he was held it, held it back with like close hanger clips?

SPEAKER_03 56:19

Peter Griffin did? All of his excess skin. I thought that might have been the Simpsons.

SPEAKER_02 56:24

The Simpsons.

SPEAKER_03 56:25

I'm Ken Prockman. And then his skin started to sag and he went. And he clipped it in the back.

SPEAKER_02 56:33

We see Scotty taking over the chair in the Hollywood.

SPEAKER_03 56:37

Scotty finished his villain arc.

SPEAKER_02 56:40

Scotty doing the moonwalk and shit. We just did that podcast like that. That's a We just did that.

SPEAKER_03 56:48

Dude, that's a rap on Goldmember, Carlo.

SPEAKER_02 56:51

What do you uh What the fuck?

SPEAKER_03 56:53

What do you what do you think of Goldmember?

SPEAKER_02 56:56

Goldmember is one of my favorite corniest movie ever. Yeah? Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 57:01

What turned you onto Austin Powers?

SPEAKER_02 57:03

Well, the the Spies Who Shagg Me.

SPEAKER_03 57:05

How did you hear about the Spy Who Shagged Me?

SPEAKER_02 57:08

Well, you know, it was a hit movie, and I don't know. I got intrigued with the mojo, babe.

SPEAKER_03 57:16

You got, do you like Mike Myers? I like Mike Myers, yeah. You ever see that SNL skit he did with Macaulay Culkin when he was in the bath with him? No.

SPEAKER_01 57:32

Look it up. Look it up. Look it up, look it up.

SPEAKER_03 57:44

Just did you touch my bum? That's what they say in the video. Cheeky monkey. Really? Yeah. That's like the the guy. Holly Culkin, SNL.

SPEAKER_02 57:58

That guy from Roxbury Nights, right? Night at the Roxbury.

SPEAKER_03 58:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 58:04

That he said, you touch my bum?

SPEAKER_03 58:06

You touch my butt? Oh no, that a bit different thing. Yeah, yeah, but well. Yes. Oh shit. This is this is when SNL was still funny. Still funny, it's not funny no more. I mean, it has its moments every now and then, but it's not consistent. My collie Cokins is a little kid there. Yeah. This is like right after he did Home Alone.

SPEAKER_02 58:28

Sometimes my daddy pays for his mama. I'm a cowboy. That's right. Bum lookers. Oh shit. And you're saying this is when SNL was funny?

SPEAKER_03 58:42

Yeah. This was like dude, this was like Adam Sandler, Chris Farley, Chris Rock, David Spade. The boys were on.

SPEAKER_02 58:50

John Foley's my guy. Remember, I told you about doing Tommy Boy or The Black Sheep or something like that.

SPEAKER_03 58:57

Beverly Hills Ninja.

SPEAKER_02 58:58

Beverly Hills Ninja. Right?

SPEAKER_03 59:02

You like Chris Farley?

SPEAKER_02 59:03

I like Chris Farley, yeah. I like Chris Farley.

SPEAKER_03 59:06

Tommy Boy is a classic.

SPEAKER_02 59:07

And so is Beverly Hills Ninja.

SPEAKER_03 59:09

You ever see um Black Sheep? Yeah, seen Black Sheep. Black Sheep was a good one.

SPEAKER_02 59:13

Black Sheep was a good one. Tommy Boy. I like the butter, but Black Sheep was alright.

SPEAKER_03 59:18

David Spade has the acting ability of my left testicle.

SPEAKER_02 59:22

Well, that's like the guy where from The Master of Disguises, remember that he was like turtle turtle? Dana Carter Turtle. That fucking turtle guy. Dana Carro. That fucking scene haunted me for a long period of my time.

SPEAKER_01 59:48

You wanna see it? He put a yak. Turtle turtle. I can't breathe.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:09

Masters of disguise. Oh, you know you're you know what you're in for with this guy.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:34

Oh shit. I'm fire turtle. Oh shit. Oh man.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:02

Oh man. Turtle turtle. What the fuck?

SPEAKER_03 1:02:10

Oh my god, I've never seen this.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:20

Yo he bit his nose off.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:28

Oh yeah. Oh my god, damn.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:33

Dude, that scene is one of the funniest. That was fucking great. Bro, and I can see that shit over and over again and laugh the same fucking way all the time. Oh man. Master of the skies is.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:48

Oh, that's fucking top notch. So, Carlo. Yes, you know what we do on the dropbox? We rate movies on a scale of one to ten using the decimal system. Really? Really? How would you rate Austin Powers and Goldmember on a scale of zero to ten? From zero to ten, mine. I'd give it an eleven.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:14

You give it an eleven? Fuck it.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:16

I'd go higher. I'd give it a 20.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:17

You liked it that much?

SPEAKER_03 1:03:18

Dude, this movie should have won the Oscar for Best Picture.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:21

How are you fucking with me now? Dude, dude, that I like it as much as an eight. That's why I've watched it so much.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:29

If I had to be honest, I'd give it maybe a 6.75.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:33

Yeah, yeah. Realistically, it's like a five.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:36

It it's really funny.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:37

Yeah, but it's funny, yeah. There's something to take out of balls with a couple joints. Oh yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:42

For sure, sure.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:47

You know.

SPEAKER_03 1:03:48

All of her bra outfits. Yes, uh. Shit's crazy. All right, Carlo. Thank you so much for coming on and thank you for being my host, man. You betcha, pal. We'd love to have you on again. We'll make it happen again sometime, brother. Alright, until next time on the drop box. Peace out, everybody. Dropbox.