Say Hello to your Therapist

8. A Fast Pass for Healing? What are Therapy Intensives? with Steffeny Feld

• Bethany Valenti • Season 1 • Episode 8

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0:00 | 1:04:11

What are Therapy Intensives with Steffeny Feld

Join Dr. Bethany Valenti on the 'Say Hello to Your Therapist' podcast as she chats with Steffeny Feld, a therapist who only provides therapy intensives in her practice. Steffeny shares her unique journey from traditional therapy to intensives, alongside practical insights about what therapy intensives are, how they work, the types available, and who might benefit from them. Tune in for valuable info for both clients and therapists!

 Learn more about Steffeny:

Her Practice

Steffeny’s YouTube Playlist on EMDR Intensives

For Therapists:

Steffeny’s YouTube Playlist of Free Trainings for Therapists

https://www.intensivedesignlab.com/

Intensive Design Lab Facebook Group

Which Intensive Format is Right for You? Quiz


To learn more about Bethany Valenti, PsyD:

Bethany's Website

Say Hello to Your Therapist Podcast Instagram

Bethany's Instagram

Bethany's Facebook Page

  

Things we talked about:

EMDR Intensives: What is an EMDR Intensive?

House of Colour: Color Matching/Styling 

Tony Paramenter, Therapeutic Fly-fishing with EMDR (TF-EMDR), 

Group Grief Intensives

Joanna Barrett: Widows and Wellness Retreat

The Diplomat with Keri Russell


00:00 Introduction to the Podcast

02:26 Meet Steffeny Feld: Journey to Becoming a Therapist

05:40 Transition to Private Practice and EMDR

08:34 Discovering Therapy Intensives

12:30 The Impact and Benefits of Therapy Intensives

18:21 Different Formats and Customization of Therapy Intensives

35:51 Exploring Trauma Modalities

36:16 Addressing Anxiety, OCD, and Phobias

38:41 Perinatal Therapy and New Parents

39:59 Seasonal and Flexible Therapy Options

40:33 Cultural and Neurodivergent Considerations

41:19 Debriefing After Intensives

44:07 Unique and Niche Therapy Approaches

48:53 Finding and Funding Therapy Intensives

56:35 Wrap-Up and Final Thoughts

Welcome to the say hello to your therapist podcast. I'm Dr. Bethany Valenti. Join me as we say hello to Steffeny Feld, a social worker and therapist who has basically turned her practice to exclusively providing what are called therapy intensives. She also spends much of her time teaching other therapists how to be able to provide that in their private practice. So who better to actually sit down and talk to about what therapy intensives are, because as you will hear me say, I hadn't heard of them before until I actually started my own private practice. So please join me and Steffeny Feld as we discuss what. Therapy intensives are what they look like, who they might be a good fit for. All that good stuff. I'm really excited for this conversation. She's a joy I love her energy. just a quick reminder. That the opinions that we express in this episode are our own and are not a substitute for any advice that you would receive from a mental health or medical professional with whom you have a relationship. and don't forget to check out the show notes to check out some of the names and references of what we talked about and where to find out more about Steffeny And if you go check out our Instagram page, which will also be linked in the show notes, In the post for today's episode on Instagram, there's an image that illustrates the different types of intensives. And if you're a therapist who's listening and is interested in learning more about Steffeny's work, about intensives, anything like that in your own practice, Steffany gave me a link to a quiz on what would be the best fit type of intensive that you could provide in your practice. thank you so much to Steffany for that, and please enjoy

Bethany Valenti

welcome Steffeny.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Thank you.

Bethany Valenti

I'm so excited you're here. I would love to start with our opening question, which is, how did you find your way to be a therapist? And then because of our topic today, I would love for you to share, 'cause I know you have what you used to do and what you do now as like your main focus of therapy. So if you could do like a part one and then part two.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Okay. Fun. So I don't always get to answer the, how did I become a therapist question.

Bethany Valenti

Everyone's asking all the technical questions. We'll get to those.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. But I feel like it's a fun story because I, you know, there's some people who are in, who are therapists and they're like, this is what I've always wanted to do. I knew it from a really young age, blah, blah, blah. And that wasn't me at all. my undergrad is actually in anthropology. I know. And I studied like international relief and development. So I like lived abroad and really I thought, like, I never thought that I would, like that, my life would look the way that it does now.

Bethany Valenti

It does now. Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Like, I was on board for Peace Corps and, working in.

Bethany Valenti

Gonna say, did you even think you were gonna be living in the US

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

No, not at all. Not at all, to be honest. And then I, had like a practicum experience, and I realized like, Ooh, this is really, really powerful. But a lot of it was very like, program focused and I didn't get as much, like I really just wanted to talk to people. so at that point I was kinda like, huh, maybe I should reconsider this. And I had a friend who was like, oh, have you ever considered social work? And I was like, no, that is when you take people's kids away. I don't wanna do that.

Bethany Valenti

Gotta go into people's homes

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

truly,

Bethany Valenti

and take

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yes.

Bethany Valenti

kids away.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

That was my only understanding of social work up to that point. And I was like,

Bethany Valenti

We need that right, like that's important,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

in college.

Bethany Valenti

But it does.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

that's a hard job and

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Exactly. And then, she's like, no, actually social workers do a lot more than that. They can be therapists, they can administer programs like in public health. They can,

Bethany Valenti

It's an incredibly broad field,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

it really is.

Bethany Valenti

just go like teach,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes, yes. And so because I kind of wanted like my foot still in like international social justice issues and I was interested in like more personal, I guess you would say like micro stuff. That's how I ended up in social work. And then I just really loved, I loved it. Like I loved therapy. I liked being with people especially, you know, in trauma. so that's just kind of the path. Where it, it led me, I worked in a lot of community, programs earlier in my career, like with unhoused families and, transitioning youth. And then once I became a mom and the pandemic was happening, that's when I made the shift to private practice because I was like, okay, I have this little like immunocompromised baby.

Bethany Valenti

Really? I didn't know that about him.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah, he was, we were in the NICU at the start of COVID for two months. Um, so

Bethany Valenti

That's a time to be in the NICU. Poor baby.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes, yes. and so I was like, all right, this is, I never imagined myself being in private practice, but it it's what I needed to be able to be present for my family the way that I wanted to be. So that was kind of my journey.

Bethany Valenti

Needed a little more balance, is what it sounded like. total side note, remind me when your son was born.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

2020. Yep. March Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

So I was just like, you were really in the thick of it then.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Oh yeah. Like one day we were not wearing masks and the next day it was like, shut down.

Bethany Valenti

And you're in, if I remember right, you're in St. Louis, right. So

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Mm-hmm.

Bethany Valenti

big area. In a hospital would've likely most places, but like, really shut down.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. it was, there were curfews and you weren't, you know, people were getting pulled over and all kinds of stuff, and I'm thinking, I just wanna get to the hospital to be with my baby.

Bethany Valenti

baby.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

So it was a very,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

a wild, wild time to be a mom and to be a therapist.

Bethany Valenti

And here we are five years later,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

you and your little family, private practice. So how did you, 'cause you started out more traditional therapy when you were doing, private practice, is it all, virtual when you were doing it,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

It was, um,

Bethany Valenti

Especially 'cause of COVID?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Well, yeah, in the beginning it was definitely all virtual and then I had an office where I would see people, in person as well. So it was kind of like a hybrid situation. some people really prefer in person and some people prefer virtual. I was pretty flexible at that time and most of my clients we met weekly or every other week. it was kind of what people think about when they think about therapy. Like coming in for an hour once a week, working with the same therapist, over a long period of time, maybe months or years.

Bethany Valenti

And you, were you always doing EMDR?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. in my private practice, that's what I focused on primarily. But prior to that, I had done all kinds of things. I'd done, play therapy,

Bethany Valenti

Mm,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

trauma focused CBT, a lot of like mindfulness type stuff.

Bethany Valenti

yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

So, yeah, it's kind of interesting how, where you like where therapists find themselves. Once I hit EMDR, I had done that as a client myself,

Bethany Valenti

Oh, okay.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

and it had just really, really helped me so much

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

loved it. And that's all I really wanted to do with people. Even before I knew what it was, I kind of was like, had this feeling like, I think I need to know that I think that's gonna be important for me. You know, like you get a gut feeling.

Bethany Valenti

Same. I was supposed to get trained in it finally in October. 'cause that was a priority I was trying to make for this year, at least getting it

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

and then my husband had surgery and my son got sick. So like having it all happen at the same time, it was just wasn't gonna be feasible. So it's been moved to like the middle of December so I am excited to

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Oh, that's so good.

Bethany Valenti

We'll get there at some point. But... when did your practice shift from more traditional, like trauma therapy, EMDR therapy into what it looks like now?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah, so now what I do is, intensive therapy or intensives.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. Cue like what, what is that?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I know, I know. I am like such a huge fan, like this is, once I started doing it and seeing how amazing it was, I just like literally could not. Could not go back

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

to like weekly therapy. So I've been seeing people usually, you know, they've had some sort of traumatic or painful experience. and you know, we meet for a week or we meet for an hour and it's like, you sort of touch on it. Sometimes you're dancing around it, sometimes you're talking about other things that are going on. Like, your roommate really bugged you or your partner looked at you the wrong way or whatever.

Bethany Valenti

life comes up, right?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

And then time will pass and, I'm talking with clients and we're kind of like, Hey, so remember the, the reason that you came in the first place is for this. and we'd be like, oh gosh. Yeah. I don't feel like we've, really addressed that. so I was kind of falling out of love with weekly therapy.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. like, I dunno, is frustrated the white word? Or just like kind of disillusioned a little

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

something like that. Well kind of like a little bit confused.

Bethany Valenti

Like confused.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. because I was like, we're showing up. Like, you know, I'm doing all the therapy things. The client, it's not like they're doing anything wrong. Like we're both here genuinely trying to do this therapy thing. And it feels like we weren't getting where we wanted to go.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I think it was around that point that I became aware of people doing EMDR intensives and just that idea of staying in session, not just like at one hour, but staying for like a half day, so like three hours or four hours. It just makes so much intuitive sense because maybe you've experienced this, but even in my own therapy, like I'm finally getting to the point where I feel like, we're getting to something really good

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

then the times run out.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

You're just like.

Bethany Valenti

having to catch up. Like we spent a lot of the time catching up or

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes,

Bethany Valenti

doing things

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yes.

Bethany Valenti

that are super important, like relationship building, checking in on different things

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

like trying to be grounded into the space. then you get grounded and then it's like, we'll see how much time that's taken

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes, yes. And so I was like, well, if that keeps happening over and over, what if we just didn't have to stop? What if we could plan to be there for three hours or four hours or whatever and not have to like start and stop again and again? And so it was just sort of like a crazy idea.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

then, I had some clients that I knew really well, who I'd worked with for a while, and I was like, Hey, would you be open to trying this? and they were like, yeah, totally. Because the feeling was mutual, you know?

Bethany Valenti

like, felt like it was helpful, but was it doing what they had set out

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

right. Yeah. exactly. So we did it and, like,

Bethany Valenti

out with the half day thing,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah, because I was like, you don't want it to be too much, you know, a whole day feels like a lot. And, we just were able to make so much more progress. and it just made a lot more sense. And since then, I started doing intensivess more and more. not just with people I knew, but with people who were new to me, but they'd had like a specific type of trauma just 'cause that's my type of work. But, the results were wild. One of the ones that I. Remember the most fondly, is that there was someone who had had a recent trauma. It had really, really impacted them like

Bethany Valenti

Hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

so much, like can barely, you know, get up to go to work, like waking up in the night feeling a, a lot of like self-harm and suicide, like kind of things going on. While, we met for a three day intensive and at the start I always do like a, you know, like those questionnaires and it's rating your trauma symptoms. she scored like off the chart, like top as high as you can, well over the threshold of PTSD, like meeting the criteria. And then within three days, we went through, you know, EMDR for those three days.

Bethany Valenti

Those are three half days then.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Mm-hmm.

Bethany Valenti

I'm just gonna keep checking checking We'll come to the structures of intensives in a second,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. But I knew because she was like, it was very clear that she was having a very profound experience processing what had happened. And at the end, we did the screening tool again, and she did not meet criteria for PTSD anymore

Bethany Valenti

After three days,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

After three days.

Bethany Valenti

What?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

And she's like a young person, do you know how many people experience a trauma and it stays with them till the day they die, you know? Or you're in your sixties, seventies, eighties thinking like, I don't wanna feel this way anymore. So one like, shout out to her for being like, this happened to me and I want help now. but two, like she got her life back.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I really believe, like if we hadn't done it in that condensed format where you're getting a very high dose of therapy in a short period of time,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

that it would've taken a lot longer. Like she would've experienced those symptoms for weeks or months longer than she had to be.

Bethany Valenti

Wow.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

So for me, intensivess are, it accelerates the process of healing

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

it reduces or alleviates suffering,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

like I'm all about that.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah, Once you're in there, you're like, why wouldn't I do this then?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

And so many, I mean, I think that's why we're talking about this topic today.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I was a therapist and I didn't know that was an option, you

Bethany Valenti

Literally, I

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

know?

Bethany Valenti

this until I started to go into private practice, and I saw you do like a little talk for other therapists and people were like, I think. Coming into it. You did explain what it was in there. It was like, I was like, I'm sorry, what is this? Like what?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

just, and my mind was so blown. I was so excited. I almost like just restructured my entire practice, but it just wasn't ready. I'm still hoping to do it like in the next year or two. you started doing it and to the point where, if I remember, you are now fully doing intensives. Like that's your, if you go to your website, I've been to your

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

You go to your website, I believe it says I only do intensivess,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. Because once I like got to be in that type of experience with someone, I was just like, I am.

Bethany Valenti

I fully do it any other

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

way now? Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

in all honesty to be like, I'm not in the business of like checking a appointment off your calendar every week. You know, if you're, and it, it really is like someone has to be at the moment where they feel ready, right?

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

to be the right time. So it may not be right for everybody, but if someone's like, yeah, I, I wanna see this change happen and I'm ready right now, then why, why, microdose your therapy across like months or years? I've heard people say it's like if you were going in for surgery and have you heard this analogy?

Bethany Valenti

I'm

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

okay.

Bethany Valenti

it though.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

It's like if you were going in for surgery and you stopped eating and drinking at this time, or maybe it's like a colonoscopy and you had to like drink a lot of stuff. And then you set the alarm, you get yourself up, you go in the parking garage, blah, blah, blah. You fill the forms, get the iv, the hair nut, and then the doctor comes in and is like, all right, well we met our time for today. See you next time.

Bethany Valenti

Oh,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

know, you'd be like, are you kidding me right now?

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

That's how therapy's been structured.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

And we don't even question it, like, myself included. I didn't even ask like, who came up with the hour for therapy?

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

and would it actually be in everybody's best interest

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

around our healing choices? You know, 'cause for some people just, just taking that step to start therapy to click the button and put your phone number in there, whatever

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

is like. Really hard. I like had, I'm a therapist and I had anxiety when I, was reaching out to someone new a few years ago,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

so you're gonna make someone go through this whole thing

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

then reach back out and they get up their nerves to like go to the appointment with you?

Bethany Valenti

And then it's

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Like,

Bethany Valenti

right, we'll keep doing, and to a degree, like I do that and I'm happy doing it. Like I

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah.

Bethany Valenti

with people long term.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

in some cases that's a good fit for somebody, they may not want to do this. we'll talk about the financial part of it later, but it's nice to know that there's more options out there for people who may not have the time to do weekly therapy. I would, I would love for, again, like you said, we barely even knew what intensives were like. I learned about them maybe two years ago. You learned about them like two or three years ago, maybe more. but they've been around and they're really starting to like, take off. more and more people I see are offering them. You said just a few minutes ago, something that I think very, very simply describes what it is. It was, high dose short,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Ooh.

Bethany Valenti

therapy. Window or something. But you said, and I remember seeing, like, my brain was like, if I could just write that down right now, I would, and I probably should have. But you said, you were talking about that client, you were like, she needed the high dose short therapy window or something,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

from

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

at. and that's kind of the gist of like, put very, very simply, you're doing higher doses of therapy and that's why it's called intensive.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Mm-hmm.

Bethany Valenti

how else would you describe it? 'cause I feel like you can't explain it until you start to be like, well, what are the different types of intensivess?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right, right. Yeah, I mean, essentially that's exactly what it is. It's more therapy in a shorter period of time, It can look a lot of different ways, which can be pretty fun. But the idea, it's like in the moment that you need it, it's available to you not having to like delay that therapeutic experience out week after week after week you have the freedom if you want to compress it into a shorter time period so that you can see the fruits of your labor more quickly,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

think is why that's so appealing to people.

Bethany Valenti

Especially in different areas, right? I know one of the things that you like to try and make clear is I really am just doing the intensive. You can still see your regular therapist,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

we're gonna focus specifically on this thing. You guys keep working on your family communication crap or whatever

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes, yes.

Bethany Valenti

Let's go back to your trauma, there's so many different ways it can look. You said that a moment ago, 'cause I remember first heard about it, I was like, oh, okay. So it's like these chunks of time. But then I heard you also say it could fall under the umbrella of actually just switching to being, someone who does an hour and a half session or whatever with clients, even like just doing longer therapy,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

in general falls under that umbrella.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

Right, if

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

but even when you do that, you kind of recommend, if possible, let me know what you think. If you're doing like an hour to two hours with a client, that's then probably gonna be switching to every other week. You don't necessarily do that weekly, but you could if it was a short period of time or,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I think it depends on what the goal is, you know, so if it is. Some people really wanna speed up the process. So you could do two hours every single week for fewer weeks, or you could do two hours every other week. And that way you're still getting, in that scenario, you're still getting the total like dosage or like number of hours, but it's just every other week instead of weekly. Um, I feel like we could have a little diagram of that, but

Bethany Valenti

I know. Maybe I'll put it on the Instagram or whatever when the episode goes live so that

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

visual of it. But it's like, no matter what, it's, whatever is longer than like a 50, 60 minute session, than typical, right.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

likely in the shorter window of time. So, here's just a simple example of using an intensive kind of method that I did recently with a client who I've been seeing for a while. And they were really having a hard time sharing about a specific presenting issue that they had. but it was becoming more and more clear that it needed to come up and the idea of spreading it out over like weeks of trying to like get into it didn't sound appealing to them. So it

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah, it's,

Bethany Valenti

right, how about we schedule two sessions next week and we'll start it this week and then we know we have two more next week. So it was like, it was kind of like we did like a little bit of intensive like increase and then we went back to normal so that we could kind of like lean into it and get like the full picture again, in a way that felt more comfortable to them. And then we went back to like our usual routine,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah.

Bethany Valenti

that was almost like more data gathering to help with the big picture, but it was very clear that we needed to kind of dive deeper more quickly. But I had the flexibility to do that within my schedule with them.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Which is so kind, you know, to like let people sit like, 'cause if it's already a difficult topic, you don't wanna stop midway and feel interrupted and you know, then it's like trying to get back into that mindset and talk about it. I feel like that is why I think a lot of couples intensives are very popular

Bethany Valenti

Oh, I bet.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

because it takes more time to work with two people and then if there's a very sensitive conflict or topic,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

you wanna really be able to have the full discussion. And usually people have to go through a cycle where you're like warming up,

Bethany Valenti

Yep.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

having the height of the conversation. Whatever, like repair, recovery connection and then sort of like ramp down.

Bethany Valenti

Planning for next time or whatever.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. And that just like can't happen in 50 minutes. shout out to all the couples therapists out there who like

Bethany Valenti

who do, yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Been doing it for a long time in that like format. But, especially, If there's something going on that's like a really difficult topic or something, like you said, you've kind of been like avoiding it, but you know that, okay, we're gonna need to talk about this or whatever, then it really makes a difference to have a big block of time where you feel safe enough that it's not gonna get cut off or glossed over and then everybody kind of shows up ready, right? Like as the therapist, I'm like, all right, we're doing this. This is the time I'm on my A game.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I'm ready,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

for whatever is going on. Like bring it to me. And then clients are kind of like, okay, here I am. I'm at a point where I really wanna discuss this. honestly, to get to the heart of it.

Bethany Valenti

like this big heavy thing that I keep not going fully into

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah, yeah,

Bethany Valenti

let's go back to the example of you're going to see a therapist, but you have so much family stuff going on that you don't even have time to come back to the trauma.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah.

Bethany Valenti

so let's just assume that that person had been to multiple therapists of like, oh, I'm not really getting to the traumas, but then I have to like go start over with a whole new person. Like I think especially with trauma, having to tell your story over and over again.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Hmm.

Bethany Valenti

the amount of times that I think some people don't even wanna change therapists, even if it's not even the best fit for them because they have to tell their story again, or they have to start over. I think. Is understated. You know, I think it's really out there of like, man, even if this isn't the best person, it has to be kind of sometimes a really uncomfortable or unpleasant situation. So like that doesn't mean that that therapy wasn't useful, it's just that it wasn't getting everything that you may have needed out of therapy.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right. Like maybe it wasn't hitting that targeted place that you were hoping to go.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. And so let's like list out what different intensives can look like. So you have done some that are like half day, I mean, technically one three hour session could be an intensive,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

counts. like what I just did kind of with my client that I just mentioned. technically counts of like having group sessions, longer sessions spread out a little bit more technically counts. but the ones that I feel like. We see a lot of, and like what you do are kind of like multiple days, right? Like back to back and going like really deeply, especially with like structured type stuff. Can you

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

walk us through

Bethany Valenti

of those options?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yes, yes. I, have found those to be so powerful and mostly because, not one of us, unless you're really lucky, you probably have been through more than one painful thing in your life. Like, humans are complex.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

having like three days where the mornings are completely reserved for like therapy and then the afternoons are like your time to care for yourself, like. You know, be in nature,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

go to the spa, take a nap, like whatever. Like when people come to do an intensive, it could be a full day, especially if there's like more than one person, so a couple or a

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

family. If there's some conflict in your extended family, that's starting to come to a head, that's another popular multi-day intensive.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

there's even some that are more like retreat focused. I mean, I think of like couples a lot when I think of that, but like,

Bethany Valenti

hard not to.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah, going away to like a beautiful destination and some of that time is used to strengthen the relationship and, you know, work through conflicts or patterns that are impacting you.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. And while you say that, like going to an exotic destination or some special destination, like it can still be kind of retreaty, like it's hard to almost not see it as kind of a retreat when you see it. Some of the ways, 'cause the way you describe it, like sometimes you'll have the way you've said it, so people I. to come see you to do it in person.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah,

Bethany Valenti

and then they're out of town or they might be in town, but even then it's just like, well, let me retreat to do this work. So I'll get a hotel room or an Airbnb or

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

exactly.

Bethany Valenti

like when, I know you said you had some that you do virtual, right? And they'll just go to a hotel and do it so that

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

feel like they're getting a retreat. It doesn't have to be that way,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

think that is one of the fun elements and of hospitality spins on some of it that I really, really like. 'cause I know you've talked about. people who create little gift baskets and like, there's a lot more of a hospitality pampering element to it that can be incorporated. Not necessarily, that's not everybody's thing as a provider,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right.

Bethany Valenti

even as a client. Like, don't gimme the smelly stuff. Like, I don't need a ca, you know what I mean? What if there's someone doesn't want candles, that's fine. Or like essential oils or whatever. But some people, like if you are going into this really vulnerable place, it might actually feel a lot more like retreaty and spa-like depending on how you wanna do it and what your fit is with the person

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Mm-hmm.

Bethany Valenti

say, like, therapy itself. You know, I think there are a lot of people who are really good at weekly therapy and creating a space that feels very warm and cozy and kind of spa-like, but it still is, it's an office. It's a professional space. Like, you know, you're, you're not coming in in your robe, but some people might be, especially if you're virtual and, and whatnot.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah,

Bethany Valenti

Am I touching on the stuff? Of how it can look?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

For sure. That you're showing up and doing something that's really powerful and vulnerable. And so, as therapists, we wanna honor that and make sure that you feel really cared for in all different kinds of ways. Not just the normal ways of

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

You know, how to log onto your session or like where to park to get to the office, whatever. But like, okay, what's the rest of your day gonna look like? Like what helps you feel really safe and cared for? Or if it's a couple's thing, like what's an activity that you love doing together? What's something that makes you like laugh together?

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

so it really is like more of an immersive experience. most of the time people are taking time off work. They don't have any other responsibility.

Bethany Valenti

took the words right outta my mouth. Like, this

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

a good fit for someone who's like you said, like the half day thing. Like, oh, I'll just take the mornings off, or

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right,

Bethany Valenti

the amount of deep work that you're doing is, it would just not be ethically like Okay. To be able to say, yeah, sure, you can go to work after

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

right. No, no. It's like, I mean, you could, but like the truth is.

Bethany Valenti

if that would be wise.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah, like, you wanna take care of yourself, you know, and allow yourself to rest if you need, or, whatever helps. So a lot of the setting the stage is like therapists helping clients decide what do I want my intensive experience to look like?

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

if I feel like I'm ready, I want to, like I'm saying yes to this piece of work that feels important to me right now,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

let's set the stage so that you can have all the things that you need to help you, like really have a, a powerful and beautiful experience.

Bethany Valenti

Which you as the therapist may or may not provide, right? Like I

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

for instance, like you said, someone might choose to then go get a massage afterward,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

they could book, but you could also be in a space, like if you, some therapists might be in the same space as a spa and they have like a contract and it could be included as part of the intensive, everybody's like, provision of that could look different. so some of that might be like, how are we helping you feel like the whole experience is nurturing and healing? and then other people are gonna be like, here's what we provide. And you can kind of tailor it to what you would like it to be.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

And just because I feel like this would be important to highlight, like. I know this, but if I had first started learning about intensives, I did not know this until I learned from you which was, you're not just like, hi, you're booked for these three days. I will see you then. Right.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right.

Bethany Valenti

it's more intensive than that.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

There's more of a process to get ready for the intensives.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

So how I do it, is that we have, a workbook that guides people to get ready. some of it is very practical, like, here's where to go, what to wear, what to bring, set the stage of what to expect.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

there's also parts where it says like, how do you want life to look different after this? Like, how will you know that the time was well spent or the money like that you're happy that you invested in this?

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

it's possible that you could do this with a therapist that you know already, or it could be someone who's highly specialized and not necessarily in your area where

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

you travel specifically for them. So the workbook is an opportunity for you to share the important pieces of your story and your background so that that therapist is, familiar with you before you ever see them face-to-face. and so that's a really big part of it, because it sets the stage for how deep you can go. and then usually there's a pre intensive interview where you're touching base and talking about all those things.

Bethany Valenti

Is that before the workbook gets done or after?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

You know, I like to do it after, because I like to read through it and really absorb and digest whatever the client wants to share with me. And then I'll take that and go into the pre intensive interview and we'll kind of review it together. So tell me again, what's the purpose of this for you? Like, what's moved you to do this? if there's anything that I'm like, Ooh, tell me a little bit more about that. Or huh, you know, I'm curious about that. and then we'll, based on the, the information and the goals of the intensive, we'll map out what, where we wanna spend the time,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

kind of agree together, you know? Okay. Here's what I'm envisioning. How does that feel to you? And then go from there. And I always tell people, you know, this is your time. And so if it happens a lot actually during the intensive, something new might come up or like a different angle that you weren't expecting. And so just to say like, I'm gonna show up and be present, however is needed. And if you feel within yourself, okay, you know, I wanna shut the door on this and open the door to this. Like, we can agree to shift if that feels like the direction that things need to go. You know, not like, oh, you're locked in to, one particular thing. Because sometimes we don't, once you spend a lot of time deep diving, you uncover things that you didn't have access to before. So that might change the roadmap a little bit.

Bethany Valenti

And again, that can happen in weekly therapy too. It's just that this is happening a little bit more like quickly in a shorter period of time. So then that could change the direction of what you're doing and could indicate. What is taken away from the experience as to whether or not you would like to do another one or, oh, I learned this. I can take that back to my other therapist or

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Exactly.

Bethany Valenti

Very cool. Yeah, so we might find therapists who, like you do only intensives. We have some that might do both. and you know, obviously therapists that just do individual therapy, like the standard kinda weekly therapy. you know, we mentioned EMDR. I would love to chat about what different types, and you also kind of mentioned couples, like, you know, they're not necessarily just EMDR ones,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

No,

Bethany Valenti

What can it

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

no.

Bethany Valenti

look like? What can people do?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Honestly, I am a huge advocate that any type of therapy can be delivered in intensive format. So obviously, you know, we said EMDR, a lot of different trauma modalities work in intensive format, so like brain spotting, internal family systems, somatic experiencing, all that kind of like flavor. You see a lot of couples intensives and there's a ton of different modalities, so like EFT or Gottman or, like real life therapy. and then another one that's really popular is, like anxiety, OCD and phobias,

Bethany Valenti

Oh, yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

right? So like I hear this a lot and I've had this experience, with clients in my own practice is that maybe there's, a specific. fear or anxiousness or even an OCD compulsion that is really, really present at a particular moment and someone wants to address it. So I had a client, I'll try to be pretty vague, but

Bethany Valenti

Vague right? Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

They played sports and they were gonna have to fly for like big tournament

Bethany Valenti

tournament.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

and, they had a very serious fear of flying and they knew it was gonna come up at a certain period of time. And so they wanted to make sure that they would be able to do that,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

be able to attend. And so things like that where there's a fear that, maybe it's been there for a while, but something's happening where you feel like, okay, no, now I really want to, overcome this or resolve this,

Bethany Valenti

Like I have a very clear reason why I need to address this as soon possible

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes, yes.

Bethany Valenti

Going to therapy is not necessarily like,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right,

Bethany Valenti

you could do it, especially if you have a few months to work with, you

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

right,

Bethany Valenti

But you may not

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. And of course, even with intensives, like there's no guarantees. People are very complex, it's not like we could say, okay, yes, if you come in for three days, you will no longer ever feel afraid of flying. Like that's not,

Bethany Valenti

like, little asterisk on the example that you gave at the beginning where there was the severe symptoms and then that

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah,

Bethany Valenti

like that was a, that's an awesome example, but not everybody's gonna have that.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

no, no. There's no

Bethany Valenti

a

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

many factors.

Bethany Valenti

not guaranteed.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

those little things that you see on those like commercials, results may vary.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right. Exactly. Exactly. 'cause it's like we're humans, so you just never know. It's the same thing with like taking medicine. some people may take something and feel amazing and someone might take it and feel horrible. So we just, we honestly don't know.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

but yeah, I mean, what was I saying? Anxiety, OCD, fear phobias. that's, I see that in intensives a lot.

Bethany Valenti

So are they doing like exposure in some of those?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

In some cases. Yeah. Sometimes it's like cognitive behavioral therapy. Sometimes it's exposure therapy. there's lots of different types of therapy that could address that, but that's pretty popular too. And I see a lot for also, like perinatal, folks. So like if they are new parents and having difficulty adjusting 'cause that is.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

A beast

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

there was like a birth trauma or it's impacting their relationship, whatever. Like that's a pretty big one. and that makes sense too, right? Because when you're a new parent, you like trying to put a weekly appointment in your calendar is a pretty big deal

Bethany Valenti

hard. Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. But if you could get grandma to come over for like a weekend or for a Saturday something, or your partner's home from work on the weekend and you can go do it,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

it like makes it a lot more possible or feel a little bit more within

Bethany Valenti

it

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Oh

Bethany Valenti

it's easier to ask for that. Like, can we just have like a day or a weekend or whatever than like, can I have you come over at this time every single week?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah. And some people travel a lot for work or they work shifts that change.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yes. Can you still do weekly therapy? Like theoretically, yes, but it just, it may just be a lot harder and doing therapy at all can be a hard ask. So for some people that's like the difference between doing it or not.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

also see a lot of people doing it, during a summer break or like a sabbatical. So teachers, you know, their schedules are super full and super hectic during the school year, but then they have this whole summer break where maybe you are more calm and actually can like focus on you. and so there's some seasonal aspects to it as well.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. There's a lot of options out there.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. As it should be, right? Like, yeah. If, if one way of doing things isn't gonna work, you know, I talk about this all the time then, like, I, I really believe people should have the right to access therapy in the way that makes sense for them, even culturally. there's types of communication where getting to a really sensitive topic in 50 minutes is not gonna happen,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Or like neurodivergent folks, you know, like I see a ton of folks who are like autistic, have ADHD, whatever, and really prefer an intensive format because they don't have to like watch the clock and feel like nervous that they're talking too much or you know, they're not gonna get to everything.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. I just realized after the fact that I think we didn't touch on how you do a debrief as well,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

So you do the intensive

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Oh yeah, yeah.

Bethany Valenti

and then you do the intensive and then you do a debrief,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes, yes,

Bethany Valenti

so I just wanted to make sure I close that circle because I was like, oh yeah, that's right. And so that's where you can sometimes talk about what next step did you get what you wanted? What are your next steps that you

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

exactly. Perfect.

Bethany Valenti

where would you like to take this on to your next stage or whatever step, day to day,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. Yeah. And usually it's like two to four weeks after, because the thing I hear so much is people are like, I feel so good. I feel so much better. I feel like a different person. And then they're like, but I won't feel like this in tomorrow. Or the next day or the next day. And I'm,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. That would be a

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I dunno, like maybe, maybe not. Let's just wait and see. two weeks kind of gives you a chance to get back to your life, sort of, you know, be in the routine of things

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

you really can tell, was that just like a mountaintop high experience or something like deep, really shift for you?

Bethany Valenti

yeah,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I mean, I've seen both happen. so it's not like there's, again, there's no guarantee.

Bethany Valenti

You're not like, well, I know it's always gonna be this,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right,

Bethany Valenti

two weeks or whatever.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

right, right.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah, like just like genuinely honest. Same thing with like how we talked about medicine.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

people like every, it resolves symptoms really quick. Some people it takes some creativity and an approach, so

Bethany Valenti

you find that most people are glad that they did it?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Oh yeah,

Bethany Valenti

wish I didn't, or like it was a waste or anything

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

no, I mean there have been times where we got into something and it was like, oh, there is way more involved in this than what we realized. And so we're kind of like, okay, but even that is like important information,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. You're

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

like you might not have gotten to as quickly. So then it's kinda like, okay, what in light of this, how do we wanna proceed? But I think the majority of people are just like, that was amazing. I like I all, all the time. I feel like I'm a different person.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I feel like I don't even know how many weeks of therapy it would've taken for get to this place.

Bethany Valenti

I talked to somebody who said, that they had done an intensive, like, it was like kinda like a weekend EMDR one, I believe. And she said, I feel different in my body. Like it was hard to sort of describe, but I just feel different in my body.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Oh, yeah. Like more light, more at peace,

Bethany Valenti

I think so, yeah. Like settled

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

More bright?

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yeah, it was very interesting. I think I have one more question and then we can transition to the wrap up questions. Does that sound good? like we sort of said there's EMDR, there's other types, so it can be kinda like talk therapy, it can be activities that you would do, like you said, somatic type stuff. Like some of it can be structured, some of it can be not. part of that is finding the right person for you maybe and what type of intensive they might provide. or, going back to that workbook of like, what would you like it to look like? Do you want it to be super structured or do you just wanna be able to sit here and talk for the whole time and just get something out? Is that right?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

For sure, for sure. I think I would make sure, like if I was a client looking for an intensive, I would make sure that the person, can help me with like. Getting from where I am to where I wanna go. So if that's like an anxiety journey or couples or trauma or whatever, like if I'm not always as concerned about how they're gonna get me there, maybe that's just me personally 'cause I'm pretty open, but I always wanna know like, is this something you experience with? Like, can you guide me basically?

Bethany Valenti

Yes.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

someone who's like, oh, I know I don't like certain things, or I really do like certain things. then that's an option too. Like some people bring in a lot of cool stuff. They'll bring in like art therapy, you know, we talked about like nature. Some people bring in like sound and music. So it can get really like niche and specific.

Bethany Valenti

yeah. I think I have like. Two or three more questions. I was wrong because they said we're gonna come back to the money thing for one. As you were talking about that, but then as you were talking about it, I was like, oh, so maybe we should talk about how someone would wanna find an intensive. that would make sense.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

how, you offer them, but like how, oh, but before we even do that, I really wanted to like list out some of the really cool type stuff that's out there. So you

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

you said like anxiety stuff, but I know for a fact there's someone out there, I think you might know him, that does like EMDR fly fishing.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

some really

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

cool stuff. What's his name?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Tony Parmenter.

Bethany Valenti

Parmenter. I feel

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

if I didn't actually like say his name.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

to get my husband an intensive. To do that with him, because I was like, he loves fishing, and it just didn't, it hasn't worked out. but just shout out to that kind of stuff. There's super cool stuff out there. EMDR, like just virtually. It can be as simple bare bones as that, or just chatting for a really long time, or just going to your own therapist but it could also be let's go out into nature together and have this conversation. Let's do fly fishing. What else have, what are some other things that you've seen

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah, I've seen,

Bethany Valenti

we talked about that, but like, yeah, go

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I've seen some, rock climbing ones. I've seen people who do it, like literally on the beach, like in a really private area. like we said, retreats,

Bethany Valenti

Group ones. There's

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

there are groups. Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

intensive that are kind of like more retreaty, but yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

right.

Bethany Valenti

I met with somebody who I think was in our group, and I will try and get her name if I won't be able to remember it off the top of my head. But I like actually chatted with her when I was doing the training with you. and she does grief ones, which I love that, that was one of the things that I'm hoping to wanna do. But she actually does them in group formats, and. So I chatted with her and it was super cool. So I'll have to get her information. Yeah, put that in the show notes

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

so great. So I don't know if this is the same person, but, Joanna Barrett just did a, like, widows and wellness retreat. And it was specifically, you know, it was a group of women and there were all different types of activities

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

to move through. they like processing their grief in different places on their grief journey.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

some of that is just like, it's really powerful to be with other people, you know, when you're like going through something and there's another person, Rebecca, who does intensives for folks who've experienced child loss. So, you know, like, think of things that are, gosh, yeah, those are moments in life where you want support.

Bethany Valenti

that intensive might sound a little more appealing, or a group might

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yes.

Bethany Valenti

but like, like if you're experiencing like child loss or something, like you were describing like the idea of like, oh, I have to sign up for therapy. I just would like to feel better sooner. You know what I mean? Or like trying to find time and all of that. Like, okay, what if I

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Wow.

Bethany Valenti

up for this one retreat? Like that, that might feel more doable everybody's different, but it could feel more doable.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

exactly. Exactly. you feel like my world has stopped. How can I,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

you know, continue to go day by day? And so having that immersive experience when you already feel like how consuming it is,

Bethany Valenti

Yes.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

like that's, that's exactly what you need in that moment. You know, like one hour of therapy doesn't feel like it scratches the surface when your whole world has been, changed.

Bethany Valenti

And upside down in

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

wonderful. Mm-hmm.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. I love that. So let's talk about, how we might find them, and then we'll talk about money,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. right. So how you can find 'em is, more and more people are listing intensives on their website. So you could simply put, therapy intensive in your location or your state, or if you have a specific topic you wanna do, like EMDR intensive or whatever. Like I work with a lot of neurodivergent adults or religious trauma.

Bethany Valenti

or neurodivergent adults,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Exactly, exactly. And if there's not someone in your specific area and you're open to like traveling, there's some really amazing, talented, therapists who like really, really deeply understand different experiences. So we've named a few 'em on the podcast.

Bethany Valenti

Or we could even, do virtual ones,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah,

Bethany Valenti

you could travel or they might do it virtually.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

It's still, it's not like it's any less, like you still get a really powerful experience doing it virtually. Mm-hmm.

Bethany Valenti

Absolutely. Okay, so some people kind of try and use insurance

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Mm-hmm.

Bethany Valenti

like still provide some of this and then some people don't. Can you kinda walk through like the decisions for that

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. So the thing is like insurance is not set up for intensivess, right? Think of like industrial revolution. Lots of uniform segments. So like insurance is for hourly therapy. That's probably what you would see on your plan.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

and sadly, unfortunately, it hasn't adapted to like. Fund this type of work. So it really is an elective. It really is something that, like, if you were gonna do this, you would be paying out of pocket. And in some cases, depending on your out of network benefits, you could be eligible for some reimbursement.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

but it definitely would not cover the full cost. So some people will get like a super bill or like a receipt for what they've paid and then submit it to their insurance to get a check in the mail.

Bethany Valenti

better than nothing.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Well, I have some clients who are like, listen, that is a headache and I do not want to do it. And I'm like, fair. Totally fair. And then there's other people that's like, well, even if I could get like however much,

Bethany Valenti

50, 25,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

exactly like a small amount of money. Um. I am like, e every little bit helps. So it just depends. But I always tell people before you make the decision to do the intensive, and if you want insurance to be a part of it, just be mindful. it's always a good idea to call the insurance company and understand what your plan covers. Because if the financial part is a very large factor, I feel like it's good to make the informed decision if you're kind of like, Nope, I, you know, it's in the budget or I have family support or, there's been,

Bethany Valenti

card or however,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah, yeah.

Bethany Valenti

however you view it as your investment or what support that you have,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right, right. There's even some programs, you know, that help. I'll say this as like the name of the programs, like victim Assistance funds. So like

Bethany Valenti

Oh,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

If you've had a trauma that was like related to a crime, a lot of times there's funds to pay for therapy and that can also go towards an intensive experience. So that's not everybody's situation, but

Bethany Valenti

right.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

but it helps in some cases.

Bethany Valenti

let's talk about the different, like we were saying, if you break it down financially, depending on how much it costs, is it still cheaper than

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

right. I mean, you can get out your spreadsheets and your calculators and like map it out, but, of course there's no guarantees. Humans are not robots. So it's not like, you know, three sessions and you're done. But when you look at the cost of your time

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

and your money going to weekly sessions. Three months, six months, 12 months. Right. If you can have an intensive experience where you're going for three days and getting a similar outcome,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

the potential savings is there for sure, for some people that's all they need to know my time is more of a premium even than my, finances. so definitely, I mean there's like, there's ways you could calculate it. It definitely can save you time and money. the other thing to be aware of is that they tend to be, charged at more of a premium rate. Kind of like Fast Pass at Disney, you know, you're not like.

Bethany Valenti

okay.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

You're not waiting the full line, you're kind of like jumping ahead and seeing results quicker. or when you go to the post office and you're like, I wanna do overnight delivery. Like anytime you're expediting

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

there's gonna be, a price for that.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

when I, and again, that's gonna be like appealing to some people. Maybe that's not appealing to everyone,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

but when I think about the client who, wasn't experiencing PTSD symptoms after three days, I'm kind of like, oh my gosh. Like, yes, she probably saved money, not going to therapy for months, but she also wasn't in pain after three days, you know?

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

so it really comes down to what you value, what you wanna prioritize, what you feel like is the best fit for you.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. And there's different ways that I guess you could use it to, address this, specific thing. Or maybe this is an, an intensive, could be a way for me to explore what I would want to use therapy for or to like kind of check in on what direction my therapy needs to go now because we are sort of at this stuck point I guess it sort of depends on your own intentionality. It could be, well, I don't have time for therapy, so I'm just gonna do this instead.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right.

Bethany Valenti

there's done some different approaches that you could do or just like, I deserve like a healing retreat then. Sure. You know,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

the funds to do it, if you got a gift or even if it's like, you know, whatever. But it does tend to be expensive. so there might be some sticker shock, but that would also allow you to potentially tailor if I'm just gonna do like a one day intensive versus like a whatever, or does that mean I just talk with my own therapist who I'm already doing, private pay with or. about could we do longer sessions, but spread them out more or

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah,

Bethany Valenti

just feel like we're not getting as much done as I would. I feel like we're always getting so close or like we we're, then we're digging back into it. if you as a client are thinking that then looking into options for what it could look like would be to your advantage

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

for sure.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

sure. Or if you feel like at the end of every session you're always like, like I have, I could just say that. Like, if it's feeling like it's being cut short, like that's a pretty good indication that, you know, an intensive might be a better fit.

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah.

Bethany Valenti

I think there's also some freedom to be said for like, what we were just talking about that made me think of like the doorknob confessions.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

thing and then like something really big comes out, like right at the end. And I think therapists would love for one to have just a little more time. But also then oftentimes we're just like, and we're starting with that next time, Which, which is the thing, and again, individual therapy is effective. Like, I'm not, we're not saying like one or the other. but if you were like, there's this thing that I'm having a hard, time bringing up, it could be that, like, oh, I've really been struggling with my eating for a really long time, but I don't necessarily, that's not my therapist's expertise. maybe I just go do an intensive on it but you're coming in with the intention of like, this is what I'm doing and you could put it in the workbook and not have to try and wait for the moment to bring it up this one week or something.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. Very cool. Well, I'm so grateful for your time today. This has been so fun. are you up for wrap up questions?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

let's do it.

Bethany Valenti

Okay. So where are you licensed?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Missouri and Pennsylvania.

Bethany Valenti

Oh, cool. do you currently have openings?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Hmm. Sadly, I do not.

Bethany Valenti

You do not? Busy, busy. and how would you describe your theoretical orientation?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I'll say I primarily do EMDR parts work,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

and I'm all about dropping into the body. I'm sure we could talk about this forever, but sometimes I feel like my body knows. More than, I even realized it's been a huge for my own healing.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

so I'm a huge proponent of that.

Bethany Valenti

Yes.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

What did they say? Like

Bethany Valenti

it.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

bottom up, like body focus?

Bethany Valenti

yes. I totally, I love that. and what would your current fee be for like an intensive.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah. So my three day, EMDR intensive is $5,050.

Bethany Valenti

And you do them both online and in person.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yep.

Bethany Valenti

Okay. what do you like to nerd out about?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Ah,

Bethany Valenti

about?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

oh my gosh. What do I not like to nerd out about?

Bethany Valenti

know

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I'm very obsessed right now with, political dramas,

Bethany Valenti

Hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

like the West Wing, but the, show that I love so much is the Diplomat with Carrie Russell. I don't know if you watch that.

Bethany Valenti

No, I don't know

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

It's like mystery. well, the diplomat, political thriller, you know, like

Bethany Valenti

fun.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

apparently

Bethany Valenti

I know.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right, right.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah, absolutely. I love that kind of stuff. I'm just not in that realm right now.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah,

Bethany Valenti

and do you have any pets?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I have a one-year-old mini poodle and her name is Cookie Master.

Bethany Valenti

Oh my God. Who named Cookie Master?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Uh, my son, I think he meant to say Cookie Monster, but we loved it so much. We were like, Nope. It's, yeah.

Bethany Valenti

Cookie Master. I love it so much. What's something that you find comforting?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I like to cuddle up on the couch with a lot of really cozy blankets. That is my calm place.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah, just like burrow and deep,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Mm-hmm.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

Do you do coffee or tea?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Coffee.

Bethany Valenti

Ooh. And what would you say is your least favorite misconception about the work that we do?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Ooh.

Bethany Valenti

People have?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I think I'm gonna say, in relation to what we talked about, like you don't have to be in therapy forever if you don't want to.

Bethany Valenti

where can people find you?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

you can find me at, intensive design lab.com. and my practice is Kaleidoscope Counseling. STL for St. Louis.

Bethany Valenti

I always like the name of Kaleidoscope Counseling. can I ask what, inspired that name,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes. Oh my gosh. in true. Me fashion, I was trying to think forever and ever about a practice name. And finally one day, you know, in the shower is when I have my best thoughts. And I was just like, I love that. Like, especially because I work with trauma. Like we've all experienced things that have like shattered us a little bit or, or broken

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

the kasu dish

Bethany Valenti

pieces.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. And when you turn the kaleidoscope, you see these like bright, fragments turn into something really beautiful and something that we can be in awe of. I think those things make us who we are. are they painful as hell and you would never want them to happen. Yes. But also they're the mosaic that makes us us. So I love it.

Bethany Valenti

I love that so much. I had wondered if that's what it was, especially knowing that you like parts work. But, I was like, yeah, I feeling like it's that, like our pieces, like make something beautiful that it shifts and changes depending on how you like, like move it and stuff.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes.

Bethany Valenti

I love a good metaphor

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

All the way.

Bethany Valenti

Okay, so kaleidoscope counseling, yeah, that was everything, right? Intensive design lab.com and kale Kaleidoscope counseling, STL. So yeah. Stephanie Feld, thank you so much for your time today. It's been such a pleasure.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Thank you. So fun. I love it.

Bethany Valenti

I love it too. Oh my gosh. I'm like, so ADHD. Um, but like, I was like, at some point I would love to talk to you about like your color matching thing that you just posted about the other day

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes, this was in one of the colors.

Bethany Valenti

I actually thought that that's what made me think of it. I was like, oh, she's wearing a nice color.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes. I went to Target and I was let me find all my t-shirts and all my colors.

Bethany Valenti

shopping easier?

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah, yeah. I mean, I saw that, like, I kind of already knew, but there were like ones that were surprises and I was kinda like, huh, I like, that's not something I would go towards. Like, this is not a color I would normally wear.

Bethany Valenti

Oh really,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

was like, oh, I like it. So, and it did makeup too, and like hair color and like nail polish, and it wasn't like, oh, let me sell you a bunch of stuff. It was just like, here's what is gonna work for you. And I was like, that's awesome.

Bethany Valenti

That's really nice. I think what I would wonder about then is just like, oh, but like with seasonal changes, like could, you

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Right.

Bethany Valenti

does stuff shift, like how was it like, did you like it the whole experience or like, did you were able to ask questions or

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Oh yeah. She was like, I, had a vibe from the website that she would be really chill and not that intimidating, you know, not like talking to some I don't know, Like someone, who's the type of people that are like, pick your clothes, you know?

Bethany Valenti

Like the stylists

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

the

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

so

Bethany Valenti

what not to wear kind of

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah. Like very intense. But this person was like very chill. So yeah, I enjoyed it a lot I'm like, you should, everybody should do it. And I'm like, oh, I wanna like get new clothes.

Bethany Valenti

Was it expensive

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I mean, I think it was pretty reasonable. It was like 300 or three 50 and it was like two hours. And then I got this book afterward and I got pictures and then these swatches that I can keep in my purse. So when I go to the store, I can pull it out and match it to different colors.

Bethany Valenti

wow.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

and she like did makeup on me so I was like, I feel like that's pretty good for a two hour experience.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah. As the intensive person, like I feel

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Exactly.

Bethany Valenti

You know,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

And I was like,

Bethany Valenti

for that.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

yeah.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I'm a business owner so I need pictures at some point. Make sure I'm wearing what's gonna like, you know?

Bethany Valenti

I know. Absolutely. Yeah. And like you said, now I'm gonna buy more clothes,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

I know.

Bethany Valenti

thank you. I just thought of it 'cause I had seen it recently where someone was recommending like, Hey, that's actually a super easy way to streamline your closet

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

of feeling like, it's just like if you, then you're not feeling as overwhelmed with options because you know like

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yeah.

Bethany Valenti

more.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Like if everything's in that wheel or whatever, really anything can go with each other.

Bethany Valenti

yeah,

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

really have like a pretty minimal, wardrobe.

Bethany Valenti

yeah. Super cool.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

She's like, Ooh, black is not your color. And I'm like, oh, I wear black all the time. And she's like,

Bethany Valenti

Yeah.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

like this coffee brown is like, you know, much softer on you, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, okay. And I thought, 'cause I'm so fair and there's like blue undertones that that would mean I'm like, cold or something. She's like, actually that's not, like, that's not how it works.

Bethany Valenti

Yeah, that kind of, it's interesting stuff, but it's also so overwhelming.

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Oh, I know.

Bethany Valenti

need someone else to just do it, yeah. And also like that swatch thing makes it sound so helpful

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Seriously. Yeah. So I was like,

Bethany Valenti

Mm-hmm. Love that. Love that for you. Thank you for sharing

Steffeny Feld (she/her)

Yes, yes, yes.