Ep 46 | Are You Living in Alignment With Who You Really Are? Core Values, Authenticity & Self-Discovery with Ashley Whaley

Wine culture. Hustle culture. Mom guilt. Perfect-looking lives online. 

If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing a lot but not actually living the way you want to live, this conversation will hit home. 

Megan sits down with entrepreneur and mom of two Ashley Whaley, and gets real about what it takes to step off autopilot and build a life that feels intentional, calm, and genuinely fun.

They talk about the practical power of core values and how they become a simple filter for decisions, boundaries, relationships, and even the clients you choose in your business. Ashley shares what changed when she started showing up consistently as herself, even when it felt awkward or imperfect, and why authenticity is less about “confidence” and more about commitment.

Ashley also opens up about ditching alcohol and how sobriety helped her reclaim her energy, presence, and capacity. She explores how habits form, why change has to be personal, and what it looks like to stay accountable without shame.

If you’re ready for more intentional living, stronger boundaries, and a healthier definition of success for ambitious moms, press play on this one! 

Connect with Ashley! 

Instagram 

Website 

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Get off autopilot, reconnect with what actually matters to you and start creating a life that feels as good as it looks.  That what IGNITE Your Inner Rockstar, is all about.

Doors open soon for the beta round of this new 8-week program and you are going to want to be the first to know!

🔥 Join the priority list for IGNITE: https://www.megancaldwellpdx.com/priority

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Transcript

Welcome To Rockstar Mom

SPEAKER_00 2:12

You are listening to the Rockstar Mom, a podcast for high achievers who are ready to get off of autopilot and live a life with more intention, peace of mind, and happiness. This is a space to expand, dig deep, get clear, and take action towards living your most authentic, aligned life. I'm Megan Caldwell. As a mom of three, two-time burnout survivor, and empowerment coach and speaker, I've cracked the code on what it actually takes to thrive at work and home. Ditch perfectionism and people pleasing. Get your schedule under control, and live with more ease. So you've got more time and energy to do the things you love without the mom guilt. It's time to get out of your head and into action. Now is the time to live your most rock star life. Let's go. Welcome back to the Rockstar Mom. If you are new here, welcome. I am Megan Caldwell, your host. I am so thrilled that you are making the time here to be part of this really, really powerful conversation that I'm sharing with you that I had with the amazing Ashley Whaley. Now, Ashley Whaley is an entrepreneur. She's a mom of two. She is somebody that I met here locally in Portland a couple years ago. And she is just magnetic. I invited her onto the show because I truly feel like she is living her most rock star life. And she had things to share with you as to how you can jump into that space as well. In this upcoming episode, we talk the real, the raw. We talk about leaning into your core values. We talk about her decision to ditch alcohol. We talk about what it's like to operate a business with your spouse. Can you even imagine that? I can't. And just so many other good things. So I hope that you get a lot out of this episode. I know in conversation with her, I got so much out of it. So, my friends, without further ado, here's the conversation that I had with Ashley. Ashley, I am so thrilled to have you here on the Rockstar Mom podcast. I have known you for a couple years, and I think that we just have a relationship where we've done business together, but also just, I would call you a friend. And I am so excited for you to share some of your wisdom, both in terms of the business that you do, but maybe even more importantly, in your own personal development journey with our listeners here. So welcome, Ashley, to the Rockstar Mom.

SPEAKER_01 4:26

Thank you so much, Megan. I'm so appreciative of the opportunity to share with your audience. And it has been such a joy to get to know you and watch you thrive. And I'm just grateful to be a part of your Yeah, I am so grateful as well.

SPEAKER_00 4:41

So a little context. Ashley and I met a couple years ago through a local women's networking group. She'll share, I'm sure, some about her business, Pod Shark Media, but I have leaned into them for a content support when it comes to images and B-roll and really being it helping me step into my most authentic, aligned self in terms of how I show up in my business. So I just love that we have so much intersectionality because also you are you're doing this thing, entrepreneurship. You are a wife, you are a mom of two beautiful girls. And when I was thinking about inviting you onto the Rockstar Mom podcast, I really see you as a kick-ass rockstom. And so you're juggling, juggling so many things. I'm wondering, can you give our listeners just a little glimpse in terms of like what does life look like for you in this season? Oh my goodness.

SPEAKER_01 5:25

Well, thank you for that. I I've come a really long way. And it's so my husband and I, we live in Gilbert, Arizona. We homeschool our girls and we run a business together. And we've ran our company together for, I mean, we've always been in business together since we were together, like since we started dating. And so every season has looked a little different, but this season that we're in right now is just really sweet and really special. And it's taken a lot of really hard work and intentionality to get here. So our girls are 12 and 10. Macy's almost 13. We homeschool them. We've been homeschooling them for this will

Homeschooling And Life By Design

SPEAKER_01 6:14

be our third school year once they start back this season. And in the first six months of homeschooling them, I was like, What did I do? It was I can imagine. It was we had just moved, we were in this transition with life, and it was just we had a lot on our plate. And so now you kind of fast forward to where we're at now, and it's just like all the hard work and all the things that we've done over the last really, I would say, three years have really led us to where we're at right now. And it allows us to really operate from our values to make decisions that are values-based and that are in alignment with how we want to live. And so a lot of the decisions that we make are like, okay, is does this line up with how we want to live? Is this a good choice for our family as a unit? Because that's really what we are. Like the four of us and our dog, Charlie. We we really spend so much time together and we've designed it that way to be to be that way. And going, like looking back, that wasn't the case. You know, when the girls were really young. Macy, when Macy was born, we literally had no money, we had no time. We were just burning the candle at both ends, trying to make things work. Like Avery and I were young. And so that season was hard, but it was also like really beautiful. And we learned so much. And it's like you just kind of develop character through going through the really hard, kind of messy stuff. And then when London was born, you know, three years later, we were again at a different season. I was able to be full-time home with her. I came home from working. Um, we've always ran my our own company, but I can't like I pulled myself kind of out of the business world. Avery, my husband, just took it on fully and I was able to be a mom, full-on mom mode. And that was a different season too, with its struggles and and hard stuff too. Because, you know, when you've got a three-year-old and a newborn, there's that's like your life. That is your world. Yeah. And so lots of needs. Lots of needs. And then I just also through that really realized that I really love being an entrepreneur. I love working. I love diving into work and like there's so much passion in what we do. And so kind of navigating, I would say, over the last like decade or so of really finding that that sweet spot of how can I be both a really like present mom and wife, friend, daughter, all the things, but then also really have the capacity to really build a thriving business. And we've found that through a lot of hard work and developing systems.

SPEAKER_00 11:08

Oh my goodness. I love this. I have so many questions, but one thing I just want to start by kind of reflecting back to you is like, I think you call something out so beautifully that this is a journey. And that despite our best intentions and our our deepest desires, like it sometimes it takes like going through the messy middle, falling down a couple of times, having real hardship come to be able to learn what you need to learn to get to the space that you are are hoping to get to. And so it really is this beautiful journey. You also mentioned something I speak to often, which is just seasons, which is like, yeah, when our kids are younger, my kids are of similar age, they're 15, 12, and 10 at this time, like a little bit more independent. They definitely have differing needs, but it's not like they need me watching them 24-7, like when I was operating a business when they were toddlers, right? And so just like really acknowledging and giving ourselves grace, especially those that are listening that are maybe in some of those, like, I was gonna say thicker areas. I mean, every season has its challenges, but the ones where like your kids are maybe younger, not sleeping through the night, or have differing needs, just knowing that like seasons will pass. And one last thing I just really want to call out because I stand so true to this. It is at the heart of why I lead the communities I lead and do the coaching that I do, is that the concept of duality. Two things can be true. You can love working and being an entrepreneur, and you can work towards that. You don't have to sacrifice that, and you can also show up as a loving mom. And so I love that, like in that little intro that you just shared of yourself, it's like you can make it, you can make it happen. And you you mentioned kind of two big things, I think hard work and intentionality. When you say intentionality, you also called out something that that I guide all of my clients through, which is really thinking about how do we get into value-based action. And talk to me a little bit about like your discovery of your values and like how that has led you to come to the place where you are right now. Because again, knowing you personally in person, individually, and then seeing your presence again in the social space, like you're not just putting up a facade. Like you very much are living authentically as yourself. So tell us just a little bit about kind of that value-based living, as well as what has truly allowed you to step into your most authentic self.

SPEAKER_01 13:14

Thank you. And that seriously means so much when you say, like, what you're seeing, you know, online is the same as what you're seeing when we get together in person, because that is true. I am rooted in who I am. I am an encourager, I love people. I I really this this type of stuff really fuels me. And I love connecting with others that share that similar zest for relationship and friendship. And it's just, I've always I've been that way since I was a kid. I've always really valued friendship and I always had a just different groups, and I was always doing something. And so just thank you. That really means a lot. And I think so kind of so there's kind of two parts to this. The first I'll touch on is that authenticity and showing up in a way that really is true to who you are, but can also be a little uncomfortable when you're first kind of getting putting yourself out there, right? So I started showing up consistently. I mean, I've always had social. I I haven't always used it the way that I use it now. And now I'm highly intentional around my personal brand, our business brand. But when it comes to our personal brand, I started showing up consistently to tie it to my personal brand to my business probably three years ago. And showing up in a way that was different from like posting that London had just got potty trained or right, like posting that that we were on a family vacation and it was so much fun. You know, posting with intentionality for people to get to know who I was, not just as a mom or a business owner, but as a person, like as an individual. And in the beginning, that was really kind of tricky to navigate because in your mind you're thinking, what if somebody thinks this is weird, or what if people are wondering what I'm doing? Or and you're you're trying to figure out your messaging. You're trying to figure out what direction you want to go in. And and so I was I was actually thinking about this earlier today while I was getting ready. So it's just the synchronicities. Yes, of course. It's so beautiful how that this kind of came up. But the main thing that has driven the consistency and then ultimately the success result is that I continued to show up. I continued to put myself out there even when it felt uncomfortable, even when I was wondering if what I was doing was even going to produce any sort of fruit. And looking back, it's because I was consistent. It was because I was showing up even when it wasn't polished or pretty. And it's still not polished and pretty all the time. It's still sometimes I'm just I'm showing up. That's real, right?

SPEAKER_00 15:59

That that feels more real to us as viewers as well. So yeah. I love that. This concept of consistency. And I think, you know, we definitely have some business owners and people who have personal brands in our audience. And then we also have others who don't. And I think the power of consistency and being able to show up consistently as yourself, again, whether it be on social media or whether it just be in relationship, how you show up authentically with your spouse or with your in-laws or with your children, like that's so powerful. And I think one thing I gather from that that I just want to kind of repeat is it's gonna be imperfect. Like it's gonna be trial and error, but it's like putting yourself out there and being a little vulnerable to even try that is then gonna produce the results. Again, the results, whether the results being you had a real go viral last week, I think, or results in business or building like relationships, or whether the results are I now have a deeper connection with my spouse because I feel that they truly see me. I may or may not be speaking from my own personal experience, right? And so just this power of like, it's it's almost like Brene Brown says, where it's like being in the arena, right? It's like you step into the arena and then just keep playing, keep being consistent. So I love that you share about that.

SPEAKER_01 17:07

Yeah, it's so true. And a lot of times it kind of goes back to who you were as a kid. You know, before I I love this quote. It says, get back to who you were before the world

Values-Based Living And Authenticity

SPEAKER_01 17:19

got a hold of you. And in just again, going back through different seasons of life. I'm 39, I just turned 39, and I look at, okay, who I was in my early 30s, who I was in my 20s, who I was in my teens, who I was when my girls are were my age. And every kind of one of those, you know, decades, right, left a strong impression on who we are today. And there's pieces that I pull from different seasons, and especially because my girls are Macy, like I said, Macy's almost 13 and London's 10, you know, eighth and fifth grade. And it's like, man, those years were so pivotal for me as a kid. And there was some really hard stuff, but there was some really like good stuff. Like I just remember just how much I love to like get creative and be outside and have, you know, do stuff with friends and be silly and you know, not take yourself too seriously. And so it's kind of like pulling those things that were true then and remembering that that's still a part of who you are. Like that little crazy is still in you.

SPEAKER_00 18:29

And I love Ashley. I think one reason why, you know, I'm just so drawn to you and feel so connected to you is because one of one of our, I think, I don't know if it's a core value for you, it is for me, it's posted on the wall over there, is fun. Is like we have to have fun in this life. If we're just going through the motions, going through the monotonous day-to-day tasks, checking the boxes, keys, keeping the house clean, doing the work tasks, getting the kids to their soccer practices, life can feel boring. And so it's really tapping into that fun, that joy, that play. And I think that that's so many of us have lost that sense of self of those younger selves where we truly lived in kind of more of a state of bliss. I'm curious if you can share it all in terms of what helped you be able to tap back into those past versions of self.

SPEAKER_01 19:10

So there's a number of things. And I'll just before I tap into that, I'll kind of go back to that question you had asked about values and core values. Well, our number one core value is have fun. So I think that that is why we connect so highly. And we went through a program back in 2020 for our cleaning company where we developed our core values. And I was like, why haven't I had these my entire life? And so they have been a strong filter. And so our core values are have fun, be honest, find solutions, and be respectful. Those are the four core values that we we live them. Avery and I live them, we breathe them, we speak them to our kids, and so they do really act as that funnel. And so over the last since I've known them, like since I've truly been rooted in them, they have allowed me to make decisions, they've allowed me to evaluate relationships, they've allowed me to be a better parent, be a better spouse. So I would say core values are are so pivotal to living a rock star life because and an authentic life, because it's yeah, it's rooted. It's not just like, oh, I pick these. Like there's a process to developing your core values. And once you do, then that that allows you to just really live in the It's literally life-changing.

SPEAKER_00 20:37

And this is exactly what sits in the first module or the first layer rather of the Rockstar Mom framework, which I teach and coach on, is what where I guide women through call what I call the Rockstar Mom essentials. And a big piece of that essentials, your foundation of really getting back to the root of who you are, is getting in touch with your values. And I think, as you said, like so much of it, at least what I find in working with so many women, is we're oftentimes peeling back layers of values that were maybe either pushed onto us or ones that our our parents really found value in, or ones that society, some of that conditioning, if you will, because I know you and I are of similar ages and we come out of a time where it's like, work harder, do more, be more productive. And so a lot of people feel, at least that come into my world as high achievers, are like, that's one of my core values. It's like all I've known. But as we peel back the layers, it's like actually a core value, maybe, is more of a sense of internal peace, which goes against this work harder, do more, right? And so I just love that this, like that you had the opportunity to do this for yourself and to now see like they values literally become like a playbook that you play off of day to day in terms of, as you said, making decisions. I know that that was one of the first things that when my own personal development journey started back in 2018, 2019, one of the first things I did with my therapist, and it's life-changing. So I love just hearing how that was for you and just like it's so powerful. Yeah, it is.

SPEAKER_01 21:59

It really helps you make decisions that are truly meant to help you build your life, right? And even like with our clients now, we'll be like, okay, is this truly a core values match? And or are our core values being broken here on many different levels. And then it kind of allows you to have those necessary conversations, or when a new client comes into the fold, you're like, holy smokes, this person is in complete alignment with our core values, and it you just get so excited. So I cannot encourage discovering your core values enough. It is, it literally will be life-changing, even if that sounds slightly dramatic, to listening.

SPEAKER_00 22:43

It's so true. It's so true. I I stand by it. And I love that like the word that came to mind as you were saying that, you know, again, we're both in the entrepreneurial space where we attract our soulmate clients. And like the more true to that we are to ourselves, as we were talking about authenticity, the more magnetic we become, because people are either gonna feed into my big, loud, playful, fun energy, or they're not. And there is no right or wrong, but it's like it's a way to truly, I think, build connection with others. Again, whether it be in business and developing client relationships, but also friendships, relationships within our personal home environment, relationship like how we show up with our parents or in-laws or whoever it may be. It just really, I think can, yeah, the word that's coming to me right now is like it can be just so empowering when you are able to tap into that space. So amazing, amazing.

SPEAKER_01 23:31

Yes, one million percent. And then to just to kind of go back to your other question around what are some things that kind of led to tapping back into that childlike spirit, that

Core Values As A Daily Filter

SPEAKER_01 23:44

playfulness, that, you know, kind of getting back to those the good things that have really helped build you as a as a woman. And I would say there's a number of things. One specifically is I I've ditched alcohol. So I I would say that that's probably been one of the largest catalysts to really unlocking who I truly am and how I truly want to live. I started drinking at a very young age. I had my first beer when I was 12, and it was like not just a sip, it was like three full-on Budweisers. Yeah. And it was, I mean, that that's the same age as my daughter right now. And I can't even imagine. It's like scary to think about, right? Uh yeah. It is. And so, and again, different times back then. So grateful that social media did not exist back then, but I grew up in a really small town, 2,500 people. And it was kind of what what happened in a small town. Like it was just you started parties in the woods.

SPEAKER_00 24:53

I grew up in a very small town as well.

SPEAKER_01 24:56

Yes. Yep. Cornfields, dirt roads, like it was, it was just, it was part of society, the the people that we're we were associating with, right? And that too is like who you surround yourself with is what you will become. And so there was just this piece of me that was like a party girl at heart and from a young age. And then my parents were divorced, and so I I lived with my mom and my stepdad and my brother and sister, but I would go back to my dad's in the summer and on spring break. And anytime I would go back to my dad's, it was always really fun. Like it was there was really no rules. Yeah. And then, you know, at my mom's, it was like it was super strict, right? And looking back, I'm like, thank you, mom, for being so strict. Thank you for keeping me safe. And I'm like, thank you, Dad. Like, thank you for instilling that fun bone in me.

SPEAKER_00 25:55

But again, it was a big divide there, and you were navigating, I'm sure.

SPEAKER_01 25:59

Yes, and there was so, you know, kind of going back to who you were during that time, like 12 to 18, there was so much that happened in my life during that time. And alcohol was kind of like riding shotgun during that time. The anchor to it. Yeah. And so as I, you know, got into my twenties and started, you know, down the entrepreneurial path, and it was like I was usually the youngest one that was I sold real estate for five years back in Minnesota, and I was like the youngest one at the real estate firm, and they would like go out, they would call them liquid lunches. And so I would go out and have like my liquid lunch. I was just just young, 21-year-old, like 115 pounds, drinking Pinot Grigio at 12 o'clock on a Tuesday, you know? And so it kind of this this habit just formed. And it formed in such a way where it became a piece of my story, it became a piece of my life, and it became this like it was really dimming who I truly was at my heart, who I was created to be. And there was just multiple times throughout my adult life where I was like, man, I think I probably need to not drink. Yeah. And multiple times I had I had given it up and I uh I gave it up for 15 months when we were transitioning. So we were moving from Sherwood out to our family's property, which that is a whole different story. Mm-hmm. But I gave it up for 15 months and I was like, okay, I think I can, I think I'll be good. I think I can probably have some wine on my birthday. And so I did, and that one glass of wine just led right back down to the same path that I was on. And then once we moved to Arizona, it was on it was on Thanksgiving where I was like, I can't do this anymore. Like I, it is literally sucking the life out of me. It is taking my zest, it is not who I meant to be. I cannot operate at the capacity that I know I'm destined to operate. And don't get me wrong, boom, like all this time, all you know, this decades of drinking, right? Like I was still operating at a pretty high capacity. Yeah. But when I looked and I was completely honest and just real with myself, it was the one thing that was really holding me back. It was it

Ditching Alcohol And Finding Yourself

SPEAKER_01 28:27

nothing else was what alcohol was. And so I was like, I need to be done. And I remember I had a conversation with Avery because I'd said it, you know, so many times before. And he was like, it's like, okay, let's do this. And so yeah, I created an account on Instagram called The Getting Sober Mama. And I just started sharing my my journey very openly, and and that has been such a gift. It has been, I want to say, one of like the main reasons why I've been able to stay sober, is because I have this extra layer of accountability that is people are so helpful. And it's so good. I'm like, man, I wish I would have started an Instagram account for this a decade ago, you know, but here we are, and you can't, you know, turn it.

SPEAKER_00 29:15

We're on the journey, and this is when it was meant to be. At the time of recording, Ashley, how how many days or how many months are you sober?

SPEAKER_01 29:21

So it was just like 255 days. I have to look at my reframe app. But yeah, I think we're like zeroing in on eight.

SPEAKER_00 29:29

Can we just can we celebrate? And again, I didn't know you. I've I've known you the past probably three years, right? So I didn't know your journey with alcohol until you started sharing it publicly. And I just want to say, well, one, first, thank you for sharing all that that you just shared there, because I think that something like alcohol is something, especially when I entered the mom world, I think around a similar age that you did. I had my first at 26. I found that is when I actually started drinking more because it's just what moms did. Like it's like, okay, at the mommy outing, it's like, let's pop the wine bottles. And like it seemed to be a central focus. And I think that it's an easy way to get like we get caught up in it because it can help take that edge off of being a freaking mom is hard. And I think that like what I have witnessed and observed on your on your journey is that there's so many women in this space that like we have to share our stories so we can learn from one another and know that we're not alone. I also um I wouldn't say that I ever truly had a problem with alcohol, but I got to a point where I realized it was literally one day, it was October 26th. What year was that? Almost two years ago. So probably 2024. We were at a Halloween party. I'm decked out in an awesome outfit. It's like cold and rainy here in Oregon, probably 45 degrees, and I'm drinking a beverage that I didn't even enjoy. And that night, I think my husband and I got in some type of fight. And like it was the next day I said no more. And I've just been, it's been so similar to like what you've shared publicly, is it's just freeing. Is it scary? Does it mean that we have to confront the uncomfortable when like when that uncomfortable thing happens and we typically go for the wine? Or it becomes a coping mess mechanism and an escape. And it it serves its purpose until again, I think my story is similar to yours, like what until we wake up and say, What could this look like without? And so I'm just proud of you from like a friend standpoint of you leaning in and again sharing openly because I I can see how it's been a part of your healing journey, but also just you sharing your story allows other women to know that they're not alone. And I'm positive others have decided to take steps. Yeah. Whether it be alcohol or whether it be, you know, addiction to scrolling or or other things, like just being able to truly live in the present. And we can't do that unless we are fully at capacity. So I just thank you. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 31:46

Yeah, it's so it's so personal. Everybody's journey is so personal and it it has to be your decision. It can't be whenever you're making a change within a habit or a pattern or a discipline. It's it's your choice, it's your decision, and it's your it's so personal. And nobody can make those choices for you, right? You have to make them for yourself. And sometimes you have to keep repeating the hard lesson until you actually finally get it.

SPEAKER_00 32:18

Already, totally. And I feel like I have this conversation with clients often where they're like, Megan, I feel like I'm bringing the same problem over to you over and over and over again. And it's like, you are, and that's okay because one of these times, and I see it, and it it's it's why it fuels me to continue to do the work that I do, something shifts. You're in a different season. You hear it for the hundredth time from somebody slightly differently, and it makes sense. And it's this is where I believe just you know, in like the divineness of like everything is being orchestrated around us, and like in due time, yeah, it's gonna come to be. And so that's amazing. So, so good. And I think, you know, looping it back to kind of uh the original part of our conversation here in terms of like, how do we show up authentically as ourselves? I think the big piece of this, whether again it's it's alcohol or not, is like we have to be willing to get a little uncomfortable to really tap and tune inward to the little girl in us, the past version of ourselves, but also as we talked about values, like having that vision for what lies ahead. So good, Ashley, so good. I want to kind of pivot a little bit if you're cool with it, because one thing that often comes up with my clients as they're on their own personal development journey is they recognize that relationships will often pivot and change as we get more in tune with ourselves and are able to show up more authentically as ourselves. I know in my own journey, it allowed me to show up more boldly and speak my truth in my relationship with my spouse. We've been together since we were 21. So a very long time, and we are very different people than we were decades ago, right? And I want to pick your brain a little bit because as you shared, you not only have been with Avery for for such a long time, but you literally like have been in business most of your relationship. Um, I always say, like, I don't think Bo and I could ever be in business together. I think that's, I don't I don't think we would be, but like I think it would be exceptionally hard. I'm curious when it comes to relationship, both within business, but just in terms of life, like what advice or like what learnings would you want to share with our listeners as to how you've made this work and how you continue to, again, and I've I've been in the room with Avery and Ashley, like in them working together and to see the dynamic and like you truly are in communication on the same page. And I know that that's something that so many women crave. Can you share a little bit about what makes that possible? And yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:29

Yes. Well, yeah. So Avery and I, when we met, like when we first started dating and getting to know one another, one thing that just always will always stick in my mind. And I tell this to like my younger sister and to, you know, young, younger women who are maybe in the dating phase and navigating what that looks like is our conversations were always so good. And they were always like really focused on our vision for our life and our goals. And we've just always been like headed in the same direction. And I think that's probably the case for a lot of people, right? Is they, you know, when you start dating and then you get married, it's like you you start out, right, on the same, you're going in the same direction, same goals, you wanna, whatever that looks like. But Avery and I, like our conversation from the very beginning was always very entrepreneurial. It was always very goal-oriented. And it's always just been like a center point for who we are as individuals, but then who we are as a couple. Once we got married, and once we had Macy, so I was five and a half months pregnant with Macy when we got married. Avery was going to school full time. He was in the military, so he was he was going to school full-time on the GI Bill, and I had started a cleaning company. And we then we had this newborn baby, and it was like, holy smokes, life got real, real quick. And I remember us like bickering in during this time and being like, Man, like we never used to bicker. What you know, this is like this is hard, you know? And we had a friend that recommended the five love languages. I'm sure so many people know that book. But again, talking about life-changing moments, literally, I was doing everything Avery needed, and he was doing everything I needed. So he is a ex of service. That is like his number one, and mine is words of affirmation. Well, I was telling him how amazing he was, and he was basically like, I already know that I'm super amazing. Can you please do the dishes? And then he was like doing the dishes and ironing the clothes, and I was like, wow, what a guy. This is so great. And then turns out, you know, we were doing what we needed for one another. So it was like, oh, well, this is easy. Like, I love to clean, I love to organize, like, I can take those, give me those tasks and just tell me how great I am and how much you love me. And so we we kind of got that piece of it dialed very early on. And then I got really slammed with work. And we had some mentors at the time that were like, Avery, why don't you just come on and help Avery or help Ashley with her cleaning company? And I was like, Yes, that is a great idea. Come on, you can uh help me. And so he did. And what we recognized very quickly is that he he is a very systems processes guy. He is incredible at figuring out systems and processes, tech, dialing things in. I am a dreamer, I am a put me in a room with people, let me connect, let me make sure the client is really happy. And so we found that like we both have very different skill sets when it comes to building a business, which really allows us to operate in our in our sweet spots. And so that, and we figured that out on

Marriage And Business With Your Spouse

SPEAKER_01 37:49

like early on. And then again, we had some really great mentors in our life who were running a business together. They owned an exterior maintenance company, so it's kind of similar. And we really looked to them as a guide. They were just they had an amazing marriage, they were so respectful to one another and treated each other with so much love and respect. And it was it was admirable where Avery and I were like, this this is how do we do that? Yeah, this is how we wanna, we wanna have a marriage like that. And then we kind of surrounded ourselves with people who were really great parents who also had that level of love and respect for their kids and how to really parent and be really present. And so we were able to kind of take everything that we were kind of gleaning from this, I guess, like just a group of people that we were connected with, and then really take that and and learn from it and put that into our own life. So it really trans, like the way that we were as a couple, transferred into how we were as parents, transferred into how we ran our business, transferred into how we, you know, built our business and developed relationships and friendships. And I think like at the core of it, it is just a deep level of love and respect and communication, right? Figuring things out, like very much so. Yeah. And of course, not perfect puppy dogs and rainbows. Like I am micromanager sometimes where I'm like, hey, did you get this, then, this done? And I've learned that 99.9% of the time, I don't need to ask that question. You know, it's just not necessary. And there's certain things where Avery's learned, like, okay, I just need to kind of let her do her thing. But it it all comes back to to respect and then remembering that you're on the same, you're on the same team, right?

SPEAKER_00 39:45

On the same team. And the thing that I always like to share too is like each individual in our relationship is on their own personal development journey too. And sometimes some of us are farther ahead than others. I I feel like I work with a lot of women who they've decided to dive into this work, but maybe their partner hasn't or isn't as accepting of it. And like that is okay. I always like to remind, like, focus on what's within your control. But one thing that I hear you say so clearly in this, kind of like the bigger picture, Ashley, is having that shared vision, like really like knowing, again, connecting it back to your values is like, how do you want to live? And if you have connection in that space, then you're gonna make it work, right? And so I think I think for those that are maybe in that the the sweet spot that Ashley and Avery are in, is like just taking a moment to like step outside your life and really think about like what do you want? And like knowing when we want change, we have two options. We can either like continue operating in the way that we are, and that's uncomfortable because it's not what we want, or we can step into the uncomfortable of having the hard conversation or sharing the vision. Or, but it often starts with us being willing and open to take that first step. So oh my goodness, so much goodness, Ashley. Yeah, we have spent a lot of time talking about your own personal journey. And again, I think that sharing story is so empowering because it allows listeners to see themselves in each one of us. Again, just like so proud to know you and get to know you even deeper. Um, but I'd also love for you to share just a little bit about again the professional work that you've that you do with Pod Shark Media. And also I know you mentioned your your personal accounts as well, just so people can connect with you. Um, as I shared, and if you go to my website, many of the images on there are from Ashley and Avery. Like, I know just the level and the quality of service. But as I've shared, one thing I love so much about what you offer is like you are you and you are truly operating out of service. Share with us a little bit about Podmar Podshark Media and how our listeners connect with you further.

SPEAKER_01 41:36

Yes. Well, thank you again so much for the opportunity to share. It's been so fun just to like so fun. I was like, we could just gab all day. We could we could have taken this in so many directions, but this has been awesome. Take a little walk down memory lane is always it's always so fun. And it's like going back to core values, right? Fun is fun is how we live. And we really truly love the work that we do. We have so much fun serving our clients. So Pod Shark Media is a social media agency. So we help kind, ambitious founders who expect results. We help them show up consistently with confidence on social media. So we do social media management full-on done for you, where we will create the content, post the content. And then we also offer brand photography and videography. And so a lot of clients will come to us and they'll say they want to show up on social media, but they don't have any photo or video. And so it pairs really well with being able to really serve them at a high level when they combine social media with brand photo and video. And we just really dive into their business and who they serve and what their offers are and why they are the qualified choice. And then we develop a strategy and build that strategy out. And it's just, it's fun because we get to have so many great conversations every single day with business owners who are growing, who are thriving, who are wanting more out of life. And then to be able to partner with them and help them reach their goals is just, it's it's such a joy. It's so fulfilling. Oftentimes I'm like, Yeah, I'm like, I'm working right now, but it is work. I know. Yes, so similar, right, to what the work that you do is like you have such a passion and a gift for helping women really live their best life. And I'm sure you oftentimes find yourself not even feeling like you're at work, where you're like, man, this is like this is my life. This is what I get to live.

SPEAKER_00 43:33

This is so cool. Yeah. It's such an honor and just it's so humbling too to be able to pour into things that we truly are passionate about. So how are what are the best ways that people can connect with you if they'd like to connect further?

SPEAKER_01 43:46

Yeah. So my favorite social platform is Instagram. My personal handle is Ashley T Waley. And then our website is podsharkmedia.com. So all my info's there. You can drop me a DM. Um, you can connect through our connection form on our website. And yeah, I would be Amazing.

SPEAKER_00 44:07

We'll link all that in the show notes as well. Yeah. Well, Ashley, I so appreciate you making the time today to share a bit of you, to come on and and show others what it's what is possible to be a rock star mom, to live your most rock star life, to do things that you truly enjoy, to pour into relationships that matter, and maybe even most importantly, like making the time and space to pour into yourself. It's really, really inspiring. So, Ashley, thank you so much for being part of the Rockstar Mom. Thank you, Megan. This was so great. I loved it. Thank you so much for tuning into the Rockstar Mom podcast. If today's episode resonated with you, here's how we can keep this momentum going. First, be sure to subscribe to the show so you never miss an episode. Next, I'd be so grateful if you took a moment to leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts. Your feedback helps us reach even more women who are ready to live more intentional, fun-filled lives. Lastly, please share your insights on social media and be sure to tag me at Megan Callball PDX so we can connect and inspire other rock stars to live their best lives too. Again, I am so glad that you are here, and I'll see you next time.