Healing Money Trauma & Building Wealth with Dr. Danica Cicmil

Beautiful,

If you’re earning well… and still wondering where your money is going—this episode is going to shift something deep.

In this powerful conversation, Dr. Kimberly Dunlap, Wealth & Career Elevation Strategist, sits down with Dr. Danica Cicmil—an investing expert, educator, and wealth mentor who went from growing up with very little in Kosovo to teaching women around the world how to build wealth through investing.

This is not about budgeting.

This is about healing.

Because the truth is:
 Many high-achieving women are not struggling with money because they lack income…

They are struggling because of unhealed money trauma, fear, and lack of financial identity.

Inside this episode, we unpack:
 • Why smart, ambitious women still feel financially behind
 • The emotional and psychological patterns driving money avoidance
 • How fear shows up in investing decisions
 • Why you feel embarrassed asking “basic” money questions
 • The shift required to become a woman who invests and builds wealth

If your money feels inconsistent…
 If you avoid looking at your finances…
 If you feel like you “should be further ahead by now”…

This conversation is for you.

Connect with Dr. Danica Cicmil:

Continue your wealth journey and learn directly from Dr. Danica:

🌐 Website: https://www.danicacicmil.com/5-Days-to-Become-the-Woman-Who-Invests

📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.danicacicmil/

📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@dr.danicacicmil

🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dr.danica.cicmil

April 1 Workshop

Beautiful, awareness is not enough.

If you’re ready to move from confusion → clarity → strategy:

🎯 Register now for the April 1 Wealth Workshop

https://weelevateher.com/workshopregistration

Inside, you’ll learn how to:
 ✔ Rewire your relationship with money
 ✔ Build a wealth strategy beyond your paycheck
 ✔ Position yourself for long-term financial expansion

Affiliate Mention:

This episode is powered by Go High Level: https://bit.ly/3NSA0bt

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Yeah. Beautiful. Welcome back to She's Beyond Elevated with me, Dr. Kimberly Dunlap, the space where we elevate conversations around purpose, power, and prosperity. And today's episode is so excited. It's one of my personal favorites. Um, today's episode is actually for the woman who works hard, earns well, and still wonders to herself where did the money go? She's smart, she's capable, she's ambitious, yet somehow, month after month, wealth still feels just out of reach. That one thing comes up, and okay, now she's back to starting point A with saving, or or she just needs to do this one thing, and then she'll start saving. So this conversation is actually entitled Healing Money Traumas and Building Wealth. Because wealth isn't just really about numbers, it's truly about beliefs and and the conditioning that we've all been shaped with and what most of us were never taught. So, beautiful, today I'm actually joined by Dr. Danica Sismel, who helps women heal their relationships with money and build wealth from a place of confidence, truly, not shame. Okay, so Danica's story is powerful, right? She was born in Kosovo with very little, learned to turn her fear into strength, and now teaches others how to invest for freedom. That looks like financial freedom, that looks like time freedom, that looks like location independence as well. She works with women who truly earn good money on paper, yet feel embarrassed asking so-called basic, and they're my ear quotes, basic financial questions. Women who just worry they're behind the eight ball in in some place in their life, even though they're doing far better than most, and then they even actually realize. So, Dr. Danica, welcome to She's Beyond Elevated.

SPEAKER_01 2:24

Thank you, Dr. Kimberly. It's such a pleasure to be here with this amazing energy between like powerful women. So, really, thank you so much for uh having me.

SPEAKER_00 2:36

Well, great. Okay, well, Danica, when people hear the phrase money trauma, right, they often think that it only applies to extreme poverty, right? So, so how does money trauma the things that have it shaped your life and impacted you in your life, and now you have this distaste or this discernment where or you don't have discernment when it comes to money? But truly, how does money trauma show up for women who are actually earning good money?

SPEAKER_01 3:14

Okay, thank you. So, the first thing where trauma shows up is really when you end up money, uh, when you end up months without any money on your account, is like when you're constantly spending and spending and really not knowing where the money goes. And uh, there is one, let's say, exercise I really like to do with my clients, and I tell them, okay, so here's a file. Please fill in your income and fill in all your expenses, and then we go on a call, we go through it, and we see, okay, after all expenses should be left, let's say thousand dollars. And I ask, okay, did you manage? Is there, did you save something? Nothing, zero. So they are not even aware of that. They think they miss money, but once they list their expenses, and I say really all expenses from going to hairdresser, doing nails, uh, traveling, fee like uh paying your rent or mortgage, everything, and they still, let's say, monthly waste thousand dollars without noticing.

SPEAKER_00 4:28

Yeah, yeah. And those and those are the conversations we have. Like people, when you sit down, first of all, most people don't even can't cannot fathom being able to write down all of their expenses. Most people don't even have that in one place. So, how do you ever think you're going to build wealth when you don't know where your money goes every month? You you don't know, you have no idea. And and I see I've seen commercials here in the states, and it's it's it's for some type of app or something, and it says, you know, how much do you spend on delivery services? And people like, oh, I only have, you know, you know, this one, um, delivery service A. And then they check their account and they have four different delivery services. Three that they forgot to cancel, they've been paying for for the last 12 months, never missed it, didn't even think about it. So if you think about 20, 15, 15, 20, 30 bucks four or five times a month, there's almost your 30,000, your thousand dollars at the end of the month, right? So those, yeah, those things get to adding up. And so I guess what I want to know is what type of emotional patterns do you see most often when it comes time to talk about budgeting? There goes that word, budgeting and and and and taking our money and making our money work for us and things like that. What type what type of emotional patterns do you see? Like, is it avoidance? Is it more anxiety, kind of guilt, shame? What what what are you seeing?

SPEAKER_01 6:07

So, what I see the most often is like saying, I'm not good with finance. I I just it's not for me, you know. And it's it's so simple that, and I think it's like fear, like they think that is something extremely complicated they cannot handle, and really it's just the list of what you earn and what you spend. It's nothing, not nothing more than that, and that is really a starting point. But like you mentioned, women tend not to have overview, like really zero, and uh they perceive it as something extremely complicated that they cannot handle, and they don't even start. So, the what I see the most common is that they didn't even start, like they didn't even try. Maybe though they saw some complex, I don't know, uh, apps that ask you to track every coffee or things like that. But also when you see a lot of content online, you know, you get a tips like ah, you don't need to spend money on every latte. It's not true, you shouldn't go really in a single dollar you spend or like things like that. But you need to have overview at least where your money goes, right? And I think that they got also frightened by seeing some content online that goes so much in the details, they think I'm not able to this, I cannot track. It's too much. It's like I cannot figure this out. Yeah. Um, and then I like to change a bit approach about the budgeting, like to show them that is really like once we do, let's say, the overview of the cost, they see what is left over, and I try to reverse it and say, okay, you don't need to track every single dollar. But let's see, this what was left over for saving, let's put that on the side. Let's start with that money to see it's available, but you're losing it. So I would say that they just perceive it's it's not fear of losing money, right? I think it's just uh missing the confidence they can do it and perceiving it as something extremely difficult and complex that they cannot handle.

SPEAKER_00 8:17

And every it seems like everything that plagues us as a gender, especially women, women of color, women, you know, it it all revolves in confidence because we are taught that finance or money is a bad thing, that it's a manly thing, that as women, we shouldn't be concerned about money, and that's so far from the truth. So, why do you think so many high-achieving women, because most of most of our audience are women who have degrees, multiple degrees, and in some instances, well make well over six figures. Why do you think so many high-achieving women feel embarrassed to ask questions about money?

SPEAKER_01 9:03

Because it seems like everyone knows, but not really everyone is saying the truth, let's say, because they made it sound complicated, which is not. And um, especially if you already reached some position in your life, right? And if you really you didn't have the chance to go through some financial literacy class, or you never really like spent some time doing because it's a skill, it's a skill like anything else that you can really learn fast, that is not that hard. But uh, once you reach a certain status, it's a bit difficult to accept that maybe there is something you don't know, or like you feel like you're back at the beginning, embarrassed, like I should embarrass I should really know more about money than I do. Yes, that's so it's a mix of embarrassment, it's a mix of maybe at the end, also like a fear that you if you come to investing, then comes also a strong fear of losing money. But let's say now, just to say to see your current position, maybe sometimes you're really afraid to say it.

SPEAKER_00 10:16

Yeah, yeah, completely completely get it, completely get it, Dr. Danica. I promise I do. So, you know, many women actually say or or have the ability to say, I make good money, but it disappears every month. What's really happening beneath the surface when this pattern kind of shows up for them?

SPEAKER_01 10:44

So, in general, when they just say, like, uh, the money's going away, they are trying to give responsibility to someone else. Because money is going away. It's not, ah, I spent all my money. Exactly. So you need to be the kind to say strong to take responsibility in your hand. Because what's going with the money, it's what you are doing with the money.

SPEAKER_00 11:11

Right. So that kind of leads me to my follow-up question. It how much of this is actually about the systems of handling the money versus their mindset around the money.

SPEAKER_01 11:25

It's a mix of both. Like it's really difficult to say it's one or the other. It's definitely mix how you are taught. The school system for me, like, like you said, like our audience are like educated women, and I studied finance. And we were never really having a class saying, okay, this is personal finance. This is what should you do. So we were really, but really never taught. And I would say it's one of the most important skills because we all have a daily connection and contact with money, and we were never really taught how to use it. So, how can we expect? And that is what I would like to say: like that one should never feel embarrassed. Because, for example, if I ask you how much is two plus two, you will say four, because you were taught mathematics. Exactly. Right. But if you were not taught, you should not feel embarrassed for not knowing something. Because it's assumed everyone earns money, everyone should know. No, it's really one thing is to have a salary and to get money, other thing is to manage your money.

SPEAKER_00 12:32

Yeah, yeah. Now, beautiful, I want you to stay with us because this conversation might explain things about your money and your money story that you've never had language for. We'll be right back. Now, before we wrap up today's episode, let me speak directly to the leaders, the experts, and the legacy builders listening. She's Beyond Elevated is more than a podcast, it's a movement. And I'm always looking for powerful voices who are ready to pour into high-achieving women of color around purpose and wealth and healing, leadership, and even elevation. If that sounds like you, the official way to apply to be a guest on this podcast is through Podmatch. Podmatch connects podcast hosts with a line guest without cold pitching, inbox overwhelm, or even guesswork. I personally use it, and yes, this is my affiliate link. If you feel called to share your story, your strategy, your lived wisdom with this community, with my audience, head over to joinpodmatch.com forward slash she's beyond elevated and apply. Now let's get back to the elevation. Now, Dr. Danica, you work with women who were never taught how to manage or invest their money. Um what emotional cost do you see most often when you work with women who feel like they're behind financially?

SPEAKER_01 14:19

So, what I see the most common is like regret. Ah, I should have started earlier. I wanted, I didn't have time, I was busy. Like, it's I need to say to be really honest, like it's just like the excuses coming up, right? And um, but there is really no bad time to start investing or to start taking care of your finance. And any time is better than never.

SPEAKER_00 14:53

That's it. Right now is the best time, right? Any and that's in everything in your life. Like right now is the best time. Yeah, you didn't do it yesterday, but versus doing it next week, right now is a better time. So just do it now, just just go ahead and do it. So, what do women usually get wrong about where they are starting off financially at this stage in their life? So, so so for instance, and I think we were talking a little bit about your story that oh, I don't know, well, maybe I'll I'll I'll deal with it later, or I'll deal with it later. So, what what do women usually get wrong about that outside of you know, maybe I should start, or or I know I need to do it, but I don't. What what what what can you tell them to help them along in this stage where they are right now?

SPEAKER_01 15:51

So the the most important is first that they are aware they need to learn it. And I see that really that they're like a bit sort of like underrating the benefits of financial literacy, right? And the first message I want to like give to people is that they understand they need it, independent of age time. Sometimes they think, ah, maybe like I'm like already 40 or 50, it's now too late to start investing. It's never too late, never, never, never. And uh, I like to say when you're younger, right, you have more time, and when you're older, you have more money, so it compensates each other. So it doesn't matter where you are, taking care of your finance and starting to invest is literally never, never late.

SPEAKER_00 16:45

Gotcha, gotcha. Oh my goodness, so much information, but but it it's so confirmed in everything that we talk about here that right now is the best time. No time is is better than the present. So you've actually turned your fear into strength, and you now teach others how to invest for freedom purposes. What mindset shift absolutely has to happen before women can even begin building wealth?

SPEAKER_01 17:18

So for me, there are two things. First one is to understand it. Once you understand, the fear really decreases. So, like, if not mindsetting, it's really understanding and learning. Once you absorb and you understand how the market works, then that is just another skill, like you would learn, like accounting. The fear really decreases. And that is what I see with my clients. After working together, they really have that security that they can start investing by themselves. Mindset shift is um to first understand what one wants in life, right? Because if you don't know what you want, you cannot achieve it. Clarity. Yeah, I I yeah, I 100% agree. Without that, let's say, like, if you don't know what you will never reach it. And once you know what you want, then you should work towards it. And that is the mindset thing that helps you is like daily affirmations, prayers, or meditation. There are different techniques depending on the person, what person feels the most, but it all comes to that that you slowly work on your subconscious mind to reprogram it, to believe that that's what you want to achieve is possible.

SPEAKER_00 18:45

Definitely. So so what does financial confidence look like before the money actually starts to grow?

SPEAKER_01 18:57

How it looks before uh before uh you invest money or once you already started, right?

SPEAKER_00 19:03

Before you actually start. So what does being financially confident look like in in this high achieving woman before you actually take the the first step to start to grow the first dollar?

SPEAKER_01 19:19

So the first shift is uh understanding it. Yes, and second is making decision, but making decision not like uh I will do this tomorrow, but I'm starting now and I'm going to do it no matter what. Like there is no other possibility for me than to take care of my finance, so you really need to make that decision before you start. Why? Once you start, and let's say that you want to invest long term, and there are some market fluctuations, fear pops up, you start being afraid that you're going to lose your money. And that is the mistake that some people do, is then they like uh sell their like uh stocks and make losses. But in order to prevent that, we need to have knowledge and we need to have that decision clear what we want and to see okay, I made a decision, I'm sticking to it.

SPEAKER_00 20:23

Be confident in the decision that you have made. Beautiful, yes, beautiful. Don't tune out right here because Dr. Because what Dr. Danica is about to share next could actually change how you see your money journey entirely. We'll be right back. Beautiful. Before you go, I want to invite you to take the wealth asset archetype quiz. Because here's the truth: you don't need more information, you need clarity on what you already carry. The quiz will help you identify the exact strengths, skills, and patterns you already have and how to translate those into income, influence, and real wealth. No guessing, no overthinking, just alignment. You can find the link in the show notes. Take the quiz and start building from who you already are, where expertise becomes wealth. So, Dr. Danica, for the woman listening who knows that she needs to face her finances, but feels very overwhelmed, fears, fe you know, fears are creeping up, doesn't know where she needs to start. What is one compassionate step? So we're gonna have compassion, right? So, what is one compassionate step she can actually take this month? Okay, so it's it's we don't want to date the episode, but let's say it's the beginning of the month.

unknown 21:59

What

SPEAKER_00 22:00

Is one compassionate state step that she can actually take this month to start healing that relationship that she currently has with her money?

SPEAKER_01 22:10

For me, there would be like two things. One, to understand what she wants. And trust me, some people really never thought about it. They really didn't set some goals. And then they're just unsatisfied for not reaching something without really knowing what. So the first thing is really to get clear what you want to achieve. Do you want to uh go earlier into pension? Do you want to feel more free when your child starts to go to college and already have money aside for it? Um do you want to, I don't know, travel the world and have money on the side and don't work for a year? Like it's really to understand yourself, like what I want to achieve and in what time period. Gotcha. And from there, once you have a strong goal, you should be fine to take a look at your finance and to see how your finance can support you on that journey. You don't need to do some life-changing decisions like I'm quitting my job, I start a business, I do this. No, you can just start really slowly by setting your goals. And when you have a really nice vision of what you want, is it time to take a look at your finance and see how you can achieve that?

SPEAKER_00 23:37

Gotcha. So, so what I heard was number one, get very clear about where you want to be or what your goals are financially before you even look at your finances. Because what I'm understanding is saying is that even if you don't know exactly what it is you're where you're headed, there's no need to even look because you you won't even know if you're there or not. And basically, is that is that what I'm understanding?

SPEAKER_01 24:04

Yes, plus you can get really frustrated. Yeah, I can't realize that, yeah, maybe you didn't save anything, or that I don't know, maybe you're even minus, or you know, so it's the better thing is that you have a strong vision what you want, and then you're like, okay, I'm going to reach it. And now I'm going to see how by looking at my finance.

SPEAKER_00 24:26

Gotcha. So, how can how can women actually ask what what some may consider basic questions about finances without feeling ashamed?

SPEAKER_01 24:39

So, in general, you can really ask anything. Like uh for me, there is no shame in in terms with respect to education. For example, it would be the same as if I would ask my doctor when I feel sick, you know, why wouldn't you ask your advisor or your coach about that? Right? Like you're there to identify the problem to help to heal it and for the person to feel better. It's like literally you're a doctor. So there is no, like, you don't go to the doctor and say, like, uh, I have like a pain in my throat, like, and you feel embarrassed. No, it's just the normal thing and the normal problem to have. Um, in general, maybe the best thing where one person can start, if you're like really terrified to go into deeper looking at your finance, is a general rule that you should have aside from let's say all your monthly income, at least 20% on aside. And that is for me the best and easiest way to start taking care of your finance, is in the moment you receive the money, let's say salary, you immediately put 20% on aside. And then there's like a further development of the story is that you need to have something that is called emergency fund. You need to have money set aside for anything that happens that is unplanned. Right. And uh usually recommendation is between three and six um monthly salaries or between three and six your fixed costs. Uh, and you leave that on the high-yield saving account. Now in US, you have options with 4% interest. So it's like literally everything I put in that account, it grows 4% per year without me doing anything. So it's really your money grows just by you putting it on that account, plus, you can use it anytime. So it's not the money that uh you can use first in a year, three, five. You can you have uh immediate access, but your money is growing. And you're building your emergency fund for anything, car repair. I don't know, you need to repair something in the house, anything, uh, you lose a job. This is like the the the most important first step in a person in a personal finance to set up your emergency fund.

SPEAKER_00 27:10

Okay, right, okay. Wow, so much information. It's so much information. Well, Dr. Danica, thank you so much for sharing your wisdom and and and and really your your financial story as well. Now, all of Dr. Danica's information, her work, her resources, and all the ways of to connect with her are going to be available in the show notes. So make sure you check those out after the episode. Um but I do want Dr. Danica just to leave us. If I could ask you to give our listeners two things that they can do right now, and and I heard you say the emergency fund and so forth, but two things that they can do right now, today, to start on this journey to financial literacy, to building wealth, or however, give me those two things and your closing thoughts.

SPEAKER_01 28:07

Okay. First one would be really to take a piece of paper and to write down okay, this is the year I'm going to take control of my finance and really to believe it. Right. This is really the first one. The second one is to open another account, which is a high saving account, and to put automatization that every let's say if you get salary every first of the month or second, money automatically goes um goes to the high saving account. Why? When you don't have it on your account, you cannot spend it. These are the two things to take control automation and second, to have that second account to which you don't have that easily access and having that order automated so that you really don't need to think, and your money grows by four percent without you doing really nothing besides having it on that account.

SPEAKER_00 29:12

Oh, thank you so very much. Thank you so very much. Um, it has been a pleasure to to have you here to have these conversations with because of course building wealth is what we want. We most of most of our audience or my most of my audience is very successful on paper. However, building wealth is a different set of muscles, it's a different skill set. So I thank you so much for joining us to have these conversations. Now, beautiful, I really just want to kind of leave you guys with this. You are not bad with money, right? You weren't undertaught, under-supported, um even overconditioned to feel ashamed of what you do not know about money. Healing money trauma isn't about being perfect with it, it's not about perfection, it's it's really about giving yourself permission, permission to learn what you don't know, to ask the questions that you need to ask, and to grow beyond where you are right now without judgment. Wealth truly begins the moment you stop punishing yourself for what you didn't know, and and and stand in a place of empowerment, knowing that you yourself can learn everything that you need to learn. So that is going to bring us to the end of this episode. I thank you so much for tuning in to She's Beyond Elevated. This episode was personal. This episode is something that I really want each and every person that's hearing my voice to take to heart. You're building uh not only a career, you're building wealth, you're building legacy, and I really want you to take this information to heart. If this episode resonated with you, share it with a woman who's silently stressing about money, just like you're doing right now. But until next time, you weren't born to blend in. You were built to break ceilings, break out of boxes, and break generational curses. Stay bold, stay brilliant, stay beyond elevated. Have a fantastic rest of your day. Thank you so much again for joining us, Dr. Danica. I can't wait to see you in the near future. Bye-bye. Thank you so much. Well, beautiful, thank you for tuning in to She's Beyond Elevated with Dr. Kimberly Dunlap. If this episode spoke to your soul, share it with another woman ready to rise. Remember, elevation isn't a destination, it's a decision. Keep shining, keep walking in purpose, and I'll see you in the next episode.