Episode 23: Kenya

Meet Kenya, 59, who is delving into her new found athleticism. We manifest Anderson Cooper, Prince, and some sponsors. Tune in to be inspired by Kenya (and consider sponsoring "The Niners Podcast," too!)

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Hi, everybody. Welcome back to the Niners Podcast. I'm Tim Cunningham, and today we have a great interview with my friend Kenya, who is at her mid-century point. We manifest Anderson Cooper sponsors. Talk a little bit about Prince and what it's like to discover athleticism at a relatively later age in life. I hope you enjoyed the interview.

SPEAKER_01 0:22

I've never played sports growing up because, you know, we couldn't afford it early on. And then by the time you get older, like I always wanted to be at ballerina. But by the time you get to high school, people are professionals at whatever it is that they're doing. So I've never done anything athletic. So to see that I have some athleticism at 49, you know, in my late 40s, is like, what? It builds your confidence in a way that I can see why people doing sports and different activities. Because you learn a lot about yourself in the process. I'm not one that has like a four-year plan, a five-year plan, because when you do that, sometimes I feel like you limit yourself. And that has helped me personally and professionally. I like learning new things. You know, in my 30s, I was salsa dancing. I learned how to salsa dance, and I did that for, you know, my 40s. Now, this is what I'm doing in my late 40s. So I can't even tell you what the 50s are gonna bring, but I'm sure it's something exciting.

SPEAKER_00 1:30

Welcome back, everyone. I'm Tim Cunningham, host of the Niners, a podcast where we interview folks who have a nine in their age, from folks who are nine months pregnant to nine-year-olds, nineteen-year-olds, twenty-nine, thirty-nine, forty-nine, all the way to folks up in their nineties. People living on the edge of a decade, the edge of a century, about to bring a new life onto this planet, and folks who have something to share. Today, we are privileged to learn from my friend Kenya. Kenya, how are you?

SPEAKER_01 1:59

I'm great. How are you?

SPEAKER_00 2:01

I am well, thank you. It's great to see you in your uh work from home office.

SPEAKER_01 2:06

Yes. Yeah, thank you.

SPEAKER_00 2:09

Well, since this is a podcast about age and people with nines of their age, can you tell us how old you are today?

SPEAKER_01 2:15

I am 49. I'll be 50 in three months.

SPEAKER_00 2:20

And I believe the rumor is we're fellow Pisces. Is that accurate?

SPEAKER_01 2:24

Yes, we are. Yep. Very exciting.

SPEAKER_00 2:26

This podcast is still going on in two years. Maybe I'll get to get interviewed by someone too. If people aren't tired of all these niners, can you I'll interview you? I would love it. Great. Can you tell us a little bit about where you're from and where you live now?

SPEAKER_01 2:41

Okay. So I am, I like to say I'm from California and Kentucky. I spent my first nine years in California, then moved to Kentucky. But I've been in Atlanta off and off for 30 years. So I've lived here longer than I've lived anywhere. So this is home.

SPEAKER_00 2:57

It's so great to be neighbors, even though we live really far apart. Still the same, same city.

SPEAKER_01 3:02

Right.

SPEAKER_00 3:03

Would you ever say Kalitucky? Is that a word?

SPEAKER_01 3:05

Oh, I like that. Kalitucky. That's what I'm gonna say.

SPEAKER_00 3:08

Like maybe you're like born Kalituckian.

SPEAKER_01 3:11

Yeah, I'm Kalituckian. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 3:13

All right, it's yours.

SPEAKER_01 3:14

Kalituckian for sure.

SPEAKER_00 3:16

All yours. Yeah, how do you like to spend your time?

SPEAKER_01 3:19

Oh, that's a hard question because I like to say I'm all over the place. And I am a lifelong learner. I love to learn new things. So spending my time music is important, feeds the soul. You might see me dancing in the grocery store. I love to dance. I would say the past year I've spent my time training for triathlon. I learned how to swim at 35. Cool. I got peer pressured into joining this Black Woman's triathlon group last November. So it's been exactly a year. So in the past year, I've done my first swim meet, my first triathlon, my first open water swim, my first 5K. And so that's how I've been spending my time. I swim, I do a master swim twice a week, and I swim in the fall with my tri-sisters every Sunday.

SPEAKER_00 4:18

I love that.

SPEAKER_01 4:19

I've been spending my time.

SPEAKER_00 4:20

So you started to learn to swim at 35 and you're already swimming in the Master's League. Like you've like mastered swimming.

SPEAKER_01 4:28

Well, okay. So master swimming is it's really adult. It's like an adult swim group. So anyone join. Anyone can join. So you have beginners all the way to people who have been swimming their whole life. So in our group, there's probably 20-year-olds all the way to 70-something year olds. Levels of swimming. So I mastered. I just learned how to dive this week. I love it. This is the scariest thing I've ever done in life. And they're like, really?

SPEAKER_00 5:04

Because you're also a global traveler and have done all sorts of amazing experiences. It's amazing. That's the scary. So how high did you dive? How high was your first dive?

SPEAKER_01 5:12

I don't know. I mean, no, it's just diving. It's just diving into the pool off that thing. You know, that I don't, it's not very high, but it's like, am I gonna break my neck diving into this pool? They're like, no, you're not, you'll be fine. You're not diving that deep.

SPEAKER_00 5:31

So when you do the triathlons, what what element do you like the most?

SPEAKER_01 5:35

Well, not the diving, clearly.

SPEAKER_00 5:39

You might grow to like it. Give it some time.

SPEAKER_01 5:41

I mean, once I get going, what's interesting is I didn't know that I was good at swimming, like that I was fast. And so being that I just started, it's been humbling that I'm actually a decent swimmer. And so it's just I've never played sports growing up because, you know, we couldn't afford it early on. And then by the time you get older, like I always wanted to be a ballerina. But by the time you get to high school, people are professionals at whatever it is that they're doing. So I've never done anything athletic. So to see that I have some athleticism at 49, you know, in my late 40s, is like, what? That's me. Yeah. It builds your confidence in a way that I can see why people like doing sports and different activities. Um, because you learn a lot about yourself in the process.

SPEAKER_00 6:35

I hear triathlons can also get a little expensive the more you get into them when it comes to like bikes and things like that.

SPEAKER_01 6:42

Oh my god, yes, because that's next, right? Because they were like, oh, your bike is way too heavy. That's not the bike that you I'm like, listen, I want to make sure I'm gonna commit to this before I invest. So yeah.

SPEAKER_00 6:56

I mean, we're of like a similar generation, so are you still riding like the banana seat bike that you had as a kid?

SPEAKER_01 7:01

No, no, but it's a hybrid bike, but it's just heavier. And these road bikes that people compete in are are very light and they allow you to go faster. So we'll see, but I'm not spending a ridiculous amount on a bike. I can tell you that.

SPEAKER_00 7:16

If this interview gets us any sponsorship, I'll give you 50% to put towards your next bike.

SPEAKER_01 7:22

Okay, great. Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 7:23

Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 7:24

I want then I want the $10,000 bike. Well, no, we said 50%. I'll do $2,000.

SPEAKER_00 7:31

All right. I mean, that's still gonna be a really generous sponsor, seeing as at this point we got zero sponsors, but let's dream big. Exactly. Well, Kenya, you've started doing, I mean, especially from the athletic side, since you're like 35 to now you're you're 49, yeah. Finding this new athleticism, which is so exciting to think about. What does the next decade look like for you, both with sort of as your training, but also what else excites you about turning 50 and moving into that decade?

SPEAKER_01 7:58

Well, you know, I have no idea because I didn't know that I would be doing this. If you had told me I would be swimming and biking and running, I would have been like, yeah, right. So, you know, thinking 10 years ahead, I don't, I'm not one that has like a four-year plan, a five-year plan, because when you do that, sometimes I feel like you limit yourself. And that has helped me personally and professionally. All I know is that wellness is a part of my lifestyle. I like learning new things. So it's hard to say, but I can tell you, hey, I'll be active doing something. You know, in my 30s, I was salsa dancing. I learned how to salsa dance, and I did that for, you know, my 50s. Well, my 30s were most of my 30s. And now this is what I'm doing in my late 40s. So I can't even tell you what the 50s are gonna bring, but I'm sure it's something exciting.

SPEAKER_00 8:58

So Kenya, let's let's go back now. How would you say that you've changed in the last 10 years?

SPEAKER_01 9:04

I would say my physical health is what I've been focused on. That's at the foundation. You meditation, I got really into meditation. Dancing was a mindfulness practice to me. Behavioral health support, you know, as a part of my toolkit. So I would say 30s, that was the focus. And now the focus is on my physical health. And I would say that's the big difference is being very intentional and how I take care of my body. And let me tell you, I I went, I was in RLTC in high school. And I decided because I wanted to be like my big brother, to go, he was in the army, so I said, I'm gonna go to RLTC camp. I went and cried every day. Called my mom for give me, they made me run a mile. I'm like, this is horrible. I'm not built for this. I've never even, I haven't even run down the block.

SPEAKER_00 10:04

So And now you're running triathlons in the like one of the fastest swimmers in your group.

SPEAKER_01 10:10

Fast forward, right? 30 years, um, to be able to swim and run and bike um is is really, like I said, it's humbling and it's something that I know I'll continue to stay active and I can feel the difference in my body. You know, the and people I would work with trainers and they would tell me because I was small to not do cardio. They're like, no, don't do cardio, only do strength training. And as women, we we're supposed to do more strength training as we get older, but they would discourage me from doing cardio. And I think it's a cut a cultural thing where, you know, people think I'm too small. It's like you gotta thicken up, get some meat on your bones. Like that's what they would say growing up. Get some meat on your bones. So they're like, don't lose that meat that's on your bone.

SPEAKER_00 11:03

Yeah, it's so funny because the ultra marathons that I've run, the fastest people are generally the most petite women.

SPEAKER_01 11:10

Interesting.

SPEAKER_00 11:11

Whoever told them not to do cardio, they just were not paying any attention because they're running like 60, 100 miles, like it's nothing. Right. And the rest of us bigger people are like dizzy and out of our minds.

SPEAKER_01 11:22

Yeah. Well, so I'm doing cardio and it's really helped.

SPEAKER_00 11:26

So I we met when we were both in our 40s. We're still in our forties, but we met at a compassion conference and your work in mindfulness. So it sounds like you're still doing the mental health work and the and the mental side of the work as well.

SPEAKER_01 11:37

Yes, I am. And my new thing, and I'm sure you've done this. I know uh the Wim Hof method. Have you yes?

SPEAKER_00 11:46

So I've heard of it. I've never tried it.

SPEAKER_01 11:49

Okay. You're afraid?

SPEAKER_00 11:51

I'm afraid, yeah. Tell me why I should. Yeah, tell me, tell me why I should it freaks me out.

SPEAKER_01 11:58

What what part of it freaks you out? Is it the cold plunge part?

SPEAKER_00 12:02

Yeah, it's the cold plunge part. Like I'm gonna like my lungs are gonna collapse. I'm gonna stop breathing. No, breathing's gonna go.

SPEAKER_01 12:08

No, you won't. I have a space heater behind me. I'm always cold, always. And I went to Myrtle Beach maybe about three months ago, and I was looking for something cool to do. So I look for studios when I different types of studios whenever I visit a different state, you know, see wellness practices they have. So there was this studio that had infrared sauna and a cold plunge. So I was like, never done it. What did I say? Always try new things, right?

SPEAKER_00 12:39

And you're looking for cool, cool things to do.

SPEAKER_01 12:41

Right, right, exactly. So I go, it's the coolest place I've ever seen. They had a a large sauna, they had a cold plunge, which is like a pool, and then they had these infrared mats. So you go in, you do different breathing, you do as a group, you do breath work in the sauna for 10 minutes, and then you do cold plunge. So I went, I did the I did the sauna, the infrared mat or whatever, and then did the sauna for 10. They do you do 10 minutes, you do three minutes cold plunge. I did it. Then you go back into the sauna.

SPEAKER_00 13:19

Three minutes?

SPEAKER_01 13:20

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 13:20

And you didn't die?

SPEAKER_01 13:22

I did not die. Then you do another four minutes, then you go back, do the sauna, then you come back. He's like, okay, we're gonna listen to Purple Rain and the cold plunge. We're gonna sit through, and I'm not a big Prince fan, so I didn't know how long Purple Rain goes on.

SPEAKER_00 13:40

And when you think it's over, it's not over. And when you think it's over, it's still not over.

SPEAKER_01 13:43

So I was sitting there, right? I'm sitting there and I'm just like, oh man, people are getting out, and I'm like, nope, I'm gonna, I'm gonna make it, you know, I'm gonna do the whole song. I'm singing, and then I look at the clock and it's like two minutes. And so I'm like, I'm confused. Is it two minutes left? Or have we done two minutes? I haven't been looking there, like, oh no, we've done six minutes. You have two more to go.

SPEAKER_00 14:07

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 14:08

And so I did eight minutes in the cold plunge. So then I came back to Atlanta, I found a place and I do it once a week. So I do three to four minutes in the I do the sauna and then do three to four minutes in the in the cold water. I think the temperature is like 40. The temperature in Myrtle Beach, I think, was like 35 or something like that. Okay. You could do it. You run barefoot, so you can do the whole plunge.

SPEAKER_00 14:36

Because it's not cold.

SPEAKER_01 14:37

But it hurts.

SPEAKER_00 14:38

Oh, yeah, I guess. That's fair. That's fair.

SPEAKER_01 14:40

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 14:41

Well, if we get a second sponsor from this specific interview, I'm gonna use that as a membership to go to that place that you're talking about. And you can you can be my wine wine, how do you call it? Wimhof? Winehof?

SPEAKER_01 14:51

Wimhof.

SPEAKER_00 14:52

Wimhof. But thank you for the wine house coach.

SPEAKER_01 14:54

Right. But part of the Wim Hof method is the breathing. So he teaches you how to breathe to prepare you for the co plunge.

SPEAKER_00 15:01

Okay. I'll think about it. I'll think about it.

SPEAKER_01 15:03

I'm gonna send you the link to the method. You gotta try it.

SPEAKER_00 15:06

All right. Kenya, moving forward, you've got all this fitness stuff doing the Weimhof. I mean, you're and I know how busy you are professionally as you look forward to the next 10 years. We talked about things you're excited about. What are some things that concern you as you look forward?

SPEAKER_01 15:20

You know, loss is hard. Loss, you know, as you get older, you experience more of it. And I've had a lot of loss in my life, but it hits harder, I think, as you get older, because then there's more people that you begin to lose. And so being someone who is unmarried, you know, I don't have kids. My brother and I are 10 years apart. He has his family, you know, you start to think about what happens, you know, in life as you experience more loss, like the loss of your parents and you know, some of your closer friends and aunts and all of that. So that is the part that you know, loss and change is inevitable. And how you deal with it, you know, we all deal with loss differently. And so I've just been trying to understand how I can navigate that in this next phase because it's only gonna get, you know, worse as far as how we experience loss as we age. If we get to to live to be an elder, which we're kind of already elders, right? They call us aunties and uncles, right?

SPEAKER_00 16:35

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:36

Yeah, you're an auntie. I am an auntie, yes.

SPEAKER_00 16:38

And ma'am and sir, even more normal than like the normal southern ma'am and sir.

SPEAKER_01 16:42

Right.

SPEAKER_00 16:43

We get a lot of that. Yeah. And and you're in the the Masters Swim League, so you're already you're already up there.

SPEAKER_01 16:49

Yeah, exactly. I'm an elder.

SPEAKER_00 16:52

As you until you said that, I've never really thought about it that way. That age is a significant factor in in how law stings more deeply, and I'm reflecting on some recent losses where it really has been so much more. So thanks for enlightening me on that. As you experience that, are there any things you can do to alleviate some of that sting or anything within your power to make that a little less heavy?

SPEAKER_01 17:17

Yeah. So loss is inevitable, change is inevitable. Um, how we respond to loss is different. And I don't know if I know the answer, right? Because each loss feels different. And for me, having an understanding of the way that I grieve is really important and to give myself space to grieve and hope that others will allow for me to grieve in the way that makes sense to me. Um, Anderson Cooper has a podcast that's called All There Is. And I love his podcast because he interviews people who have experienced loss in different ways. And Anderson Cooper lost his brother's suicide. You know, his his dad died when he was young, his mom just recently passed. And so this is his journey to in how he's dealing with loss and these various, you know, these people who have meant so much to him. And so he's interviewing other people who have also experienced loss. And so that has helped me learn from others. You you can't, there's nothing that can prepare you for the loss of a parent, a child, a significant other, friends, whomever. But there's tools that we can tap into that help us grieve in a way that is healthy and helps us, you know, and and it's and again, it's also helpful to understand how we grieve personally and allow space for that.

SPEAKER_00 18:47

I love that you're bringing up grief. And I feel like in working through the pandemic and the jobs that we had, the roles that we had from a global health perspective and a health perspective in the US, there's so much complex grief now and so much new research on bereavement and complicated grief. And I think I was raised in a way where you just you ignore that. You you you look away from the suffering. But I think we're living in a time where it's okay to talk about, even at work, it's okay to talk about and take time for it and practice tools to manage it.

unknown 19:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 19:18

It's harder to look away too, because it's everywhere.

SPEAKER_00 19:22

And it's always been everywhere. But it it feels good that we can acknowledge that.

SPEAKER_01 19:27

Yeah, it's true.

SPEAKER_00 19:29

Is there a brief tool that you could share, like one that comes to mind that you've learned that that's helpful with walking with your grief?

SPEAKER_01 19:36

You know, one of the things that I've noticed, if you've lost people and you've, you know, there's been funerals and you go to a repass. What I've learned is that when someone passes, oftentimes I end up reconnecting or connecting with someone new, new or old. And I've and it's really fascinating because oftentimes you go to a funeral, you go to a repass, and you know, depending on the situation, you'll run into someone you hadn't seen in a while. And then you're connected to this person that has passed, and then a new profound friendship or new connection to a family member will come out of that. And so one of the things that I've just tried to be aware of is allowing for the people who we have that collective grieving together, but then we're drawn back to one another for whatever reason. And sometimes I feel like it's the person who passed was like, you two, you need to like hang out and spend time together, you know. It's sad that it had to be me dying to bring you all together again, but we've all seen it. Yeah. Where, you know, it brings, it can bring families together, it can bring families apart. But in speaking about my experiences, some of the most tragic situations have allowed me to build relationships with people that ordinarily I would not have connected with if this situation didn't happen. So trying to find something out of the experience.

SPEAKER_00 21:21

Kenya, one last question. At 49, yes, here you are on this planet in this world. What would you say matters the most to you?

SPEAKER_01 21:29

Well, you know, at the top of the list is always family and friends, right? Their wellness. If you know me, I'm always like, take time for yourself, get your mental health support, go see the doctor. You know, our wellness is really the wellness of my friends and family is important. Minds and body. You know, I'm an advocate for mental health support and resources. I've lost an uncle to suicide. My background's in social work. So Wellness, not just what we eat, but the information we consume and how we take care of our mental health. And a big thing that is important to me now is financial literacy and educating people about, you know, young people about how to invest, how to save, how to get out of debt. These are conversations that we don't have, especially in my community, in the African American community. You know, I didn't learn these things until my late 30s. And so mentoring, bringing others along, my financial wealth, spiritual, well, well, you know, spiritual well-being, all of that is important, you know, our holistic self.

SPEAKER_00 22:42

I remember there was a tragedy in my community back up in Virginia, and I was driving up, and I swung by your house, and you made this amazing meal for me, like packing. And it was like, it wasn't just like microwave popcorn. Like you cooked salmon and potato. I mean, it was so kind and generous, and it fed my soul and my body and kept me awake for the long drive north.

SPEAKER_01 23:05

Well, good.

SPEAKER_00 23:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 23:06

I want everybody, you know, be their best selves, and showing up for people is important to me because, you know, hey, we gotta be there for each other.

SPEAKER_00 23:18

Kenya, it was as we wrap up, is there anything else you want to share with the audience? Other niners listening, or just anyone that might be landed on this podcast?

SPEAKER_01 23:26

You know, like I said, try not to have those four-year, five-year plans just be open to new experiences because you never know where where they'll take you.

SPEAKER_00 23:37

On that, thank you so much.

SPEAKER_01 23:39

Thank you.

SPEAKER_00 23:41

And yeah, it was a pleasure to speak with you, and thank you all for joining the Niners Podcast. I'm your host, Tim Cunningham. Special thanks to Jen Cornell for our intro and outro music. You can find her work at jencello.com. And tune in for our next episode where I'd be interviewing my friend Bob, who is 59, turning 60. See you all then.