Spin the Wheel (Girl's Edition)

Welcome back everyone. A weird week here with your sit-in Host Viv. We were joined with our very own Barmaid Lola. Talking about Lottery Winnings , First Time Bar Visits, and a Multitude of Drinks.

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All comments made in this video are purely satirical and for comedic/entertainment purposes only. This is a comedy video. Do not take anything said in the video seriously. All people seen in this video are actors, this video was filmed on a film set with professionals. Comments made by actors are not to be confused with the real opinions of the actors. This is a staged comedic performance.

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to the Drunken Cacti Podcast where the arguments are dumb, the logic is slurred, and we are bound to make someone upset to breathe the same air as us. This episode's looking a little different because our regular host, Riley, uh decided he wanted to die this week. Um, so it's your host, Vivian, today, and I have Lola as my guest. So as today is going to be a little bit of a different episode, this is a little bit of a filler, so we're just kind of gonna have some girl time, chill, and go over some classic bar drinks, uh, cocktails, and we are going to kind of play a little game and see how trashed we can get. You ready? Yeah. Okay. How are you doing? I'm good. Good. Good. It's time for a girls episode. I know. It's been a while. I think Christmas, but oh yeah, that was our last girls episode. But we still had Martha May.

SPEAKER_00 0:53

That's fair.

SPEAKER_01 0:54

That's fair. Miss Who Meek. I'm so excited. Okay. If y'all prefer me as the host later on at the end of this episode, comment. Comment. Okay. Um you ready to get into our game? Sure. Cool. Alrighty. So we have a uh Wheel of Names uh generator popped up with a bunch of different classic drinks um and a couple different options, such as host choice and bartender choice, and phone in a friend. So uh we're gonna we're gonna get this started. Okay, wish us luck. Yeah. Yeah. We're also gonna be making all these drinks live and walking you through it.

unknown 1:35

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:36

Alrighty. Starts with shots. I know. So we have it. It was so close to shots. Alrighty, we are starting out with the tequila sunrise. Alrighty, a standard tequila sunrise includes tequila, orange juice, grenadine, syrup, ice, and a garnish. Um I don't know if we have garnishes. We're gonna estimate a shot of tequila. The best way to make a drink if you want to have a really good night. Oh my goodness. Okay. So we're starting out with our tequila. We're gonna play the you say when. Oh no. All right, ready? Say when. Okay. When? I'm so scared, guys. We slowly pour the grenadine into the glass, letting it sink to the bottom to create the color ombre effect. All right, ready? Yes. Perfect. Perfect. Right. I have a feeling it might be a little strong. Oh no. Guys don't ever trust me to say when. Alright. Now let's just stir it. Cute. I always like how it ends up that like nice coral color. This look makes me want to be on a beach. Ooh, yes, yes, yes. Alright, ready? Yes. I think you said win in a perfect time. Really? Oh. Yes. It's actually really good. Oh yeah, that is a good classic tequila sunrise. Who needs to measure? Measure with your heart. It's how you make it the best, you know? Cooking, don't bake with your heart. Bake with your heart, don't measure with your heart with baking. Yeah. Alrighty. We are going to put this to the side and get right into our next one. Alright. Alrighty. Hey, standard rum and coke. Uh, they're giving us like specific measurements, but we measure about with our heart around here. Yeah, who does all that? Too much work. Oh do that. Okay. You say when this time. Okay. Rum. We did a dark rum. Yes. Yes. And then we have a cherry-flavored coke product. So ratios are about one rum to two to three of the coke. So it could be a two to one or a three to one. Or if you want it stronger. You can do one to one. You can make it how you want. Are we what your lights gonna turn into? Right? Are we doing uh would you say this is roughly two to one? I would say yes. Cool. Two to one ratio, rum and coke. So what is your go-to drink to order at the bar? Depends where I'm at. If I'm at like a club, typically it's red bull vodka. Okay. Simple and keep it simple because you should not mix too many different types. That's when you get an audio smother. Yeah. If you go hopping around at too much different alcohol, that's when you're the person puking in the rock. So yeah. We don't want that. So when it comes to like mixing alcohols, I usually mix like if I'm going from one drink to another, I do like my lighter, like my clear alcohol. So I'll I'll I'll switch between like vodka and tequila. Yeah. Um, or if I'm doing like an actual like AMF or a long island iced tea or whatever. Um I love a long island. So I've actually never had a long island iced tea. I've only done the AMFs. Um, I know, I know. Long island iced tea is so good, but it is so many different alcohols.

SPEAKER_00 6:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 6:17

Yeah. Yeah. That's one that like if I drink that, I stick with that, but I space it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Like long island iced tea, little water. Long island, but I don't use other drinks. Oh, yeah. No. If I'm having an like an AMF or what is it? The Florida Trash Cam? Is that what that's called? Oh, yeah. I want to try one of those. Yeah. I saw a video online where this bartender made like four or five different drinks that have the same base as the AMF, so like four to five different alcohols. Yeah. They're all in different types. So like the Long Island iced tea and the AMF and the trash can and all of that. I want to try at least one of them. At least once. Yeah. I'll try it with you. Okay, cool. Yeah. Yeah. We'll have to go to the clerb. For sure. Yeah. So you know what I want to do for some of the episodes moving forward now that it's getting hot out, because here it's going to be 102 already. Ew. R.I.P. to we're still technically winner, but I want to do like some of the dirty buckets or the, you know, like the big bucket. And it's just a bunch of fun. Yeah. I want to do those. I want to try the the um the bog jugs or the borgs. They're called borgs. Oh my god. I've never done one before. I want to try it so bad. We're gonna get up. Hell yeah. Yeah. Barbecue episode. Well, that would be fun if we did a backyard barbecue and we all made like two or three different borgs. We should do borgs at the lake. Ooh, we should do a lake episode. Yeah. Riley, we're creating content over here for you. Next drink? Yep. Cool. Spinn it. Ooh, right on the line. We've got a Moscow mule. They keep landing right on the line. I know. But that one at least wasn't right on the shot line. Alrighty, Moscow mules are uh commonly made in a copper mug. Yep. Which luckily we have Ta-da! Alrighty, it says fill copper mug with ice. Okay, add vodka and lime juice. There we go. Say when. When you say when on the line. Just a splash. Cool. Cool. Just a little splash. And then we top it with ginger beer. So some tips and tricks for a classic Moscow mule is to use a neutral vodka. It works best. So no vanilla, nothing like cherry, no flavored vodka. Use a spicy, high-quality ginger beer. So we we're not taking no like ginger ale or nothing up in here. And then um fresh lime juice is not required, but it adds a little bit of freshness. And then um the copper mug is also optional, but it is more classic, traditional. Uh, but a regular glass works as well. I like it in a copper mug. It makes it a little bit more fun. Yeah, it just it just it's that nostalgia, you know. Yeah. Alrighty. Alright, you try this one first. Cheers. I also prefer the mosque with lime juice. I've had it without just missing things. Yeah, yeah. Well, because I feel like the lime is supposed to balance out like the harshness of the ginger. Yeah, this is actually really good. I've also never had a traditional mosque. Were you on the episode when we did the Aussie one? I don't know. That one was um, it's the same, but you use the dark ring. Oh, no, that was an episode before I think a week before I came on. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. That one was good, but nothing beats the original. Oh, yeah, it's a classic. Nothing beats a good classic. No, the first time I was ever at a bar, uh, and given some of my upbringing, like alcohol was kind of Mormon. Yeah. Alcohol was a foreign concept to me. So um the first time I ever went to a bar, I went to go get a drink, and the bartender was like, hey, what do you want? And I was like, actually, your choice. I and I even told him, I've never drank before, I just turned 21. Like, give the bartender's choice. And that was kind of how I approached things for gosh, like maybe two years, a year and a half. Yeah. Um, because then I figured out, like, oh, I'm not a huge fan of like pineapple juice and vodka. So and I'd like start to narrow it down the more and more comfortable I got. But yeah, now I'm just a vodka crayon to keep the sunrise girly. Do you remember what the drink was he gave you on your first drink? Oh gosh. Um that's a pretty important drink. I know. Uh I think it did have pineapple juice, vodka. I think it had blue curacao in it. And we're off to the races. Rumerita. I think it's supposed to be margarita. I don't, yeah. What who was drunk when they typed that? I think it was our sick host. Marc Word host. He prepped a lot of this for us, guys. He just said, take it away. We said, aye, aye, Captain. Good luck to him tomorrow. Oh, yeah. Um, okay, margarita, here we go. So you're of an iced salted glass. Now, where do we go? Uh tequila! When? Oh my it's all whitey. That's gonna be a strong margarita. It's gonna be so good. A margarita has to be strong. You're right. A margarita has to be strong. Margarita. I'm so gonna die. You can't have a weak ass margarita. All right. And then as we said, for tonight, we don't want to work, so we're cheating, and we have the margarita mix. But we have the full ingredient list if you'd like to make a completely fresh margarita. We can tell you how to do it. We've done it before, but tonight's a girl's night. Exactly. Keeping things simple. That looks so dangerous. Oh, it's going to be. So, in a freshly made margarita without margarita mix, you need a salt rent, tequila, orange liqueur, lime juice, something sweet like simple syrup or agave syrup. And ice. I do the honors.

SPEAKER_00 14:00

Yes, see I do.

SPEAKER_01 14:09

That's a good margarita. That's actually a really good margarita. See, again, who needs measurements? Exactly. Measure with your hunger. Measure with girl math. Oh, we love girl math. Oh yeah. Wow. That is such a good margarita. That's so good. Such a good margarita. That is really good. We did so good. Now let's replicate it. Oh no. That's the problem with girl math. Exactly. You can only do it one. That's why it has to be perfect the first time. I'm so happy with that, Margarita. You're obsessed. So happy. She's got goo goo eyes for the margarita. I'm just a tequila girly. Oh, I love tequila. Do you have a tequila horror story? Oh, I have plenty. Let's start with the indecent exposure charge. Started out with tequila. I spend four days in Vegas. Um, for four days, all I had was tequila shots. Usually when I go to Vegas, I decide ahead of time what alcohol am I gonna do and stick to it. Same alcohol. Okay, fair enough. Wow. Because that's how I keep myself from getting like sick and hung over. So for four days, all I had was tequila shots. And it was the most exciting adventure. We got in so much trouble. So much trouble. We stole a golf cart from the casino security guard. He chased us so long, but he was a very large man. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Shout out security guard. I'm sorry, man. Hope probably gave you a heart attack. What happens if he stays in Vegas? Yeah, we dumped that at a different behind a different casino. That's so funny. Yeah. Oh my gosh. We sat outside of Caesar's Palace for like six hours playing real or fake. And it was like, is it a real wife or a fake wife? Like an escort? Oh is it real boobs or fake boobs? That actually sounds like such a fun game to play in Vegas. So fun. Caesar's Palace is the place to play that game. There it'll be like a 90-year-old man and like a 22-year-old girl and we're like, real or fake. That's 100% fake. All the boobs. They're everywhere. That's so funny. Oh my god. That's why we have to go to Vegas. Exactly. Exactly. That's so much. I might get myself a new pair. Yeah. And then we'll celebrate in Vegas.

SPEAKER_00 17:07

Exactly. We'll get our tassels. I love that plan. Love that plan. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:13

Bring you along. Come look. If you want to come along to Vegas, see her new boobies and our tassels. Please like, subscribe, comment. We've got Patreon content coming. Yeah. All right. Let's spin this. Actually, I have one more question. Oh, okay. Before we get started on that. Do you have any, besides like not really crossing alcohols or anything, do you have a like a liquor law that you live by, either whether you're going out or staying at home?

SPEAKER_02 17:47

Right.

SPEAKER_01 17:48

Yes. So rule of thumb should be every two drinks, you drink a full cup of water. Okay. Okay. Or a bottle of water. Okay. I can I can get behind that. So you should be drinking water in between your drinks. Yeah. If you're going to do a long night, like if you're at a club, you're at a bar, you're just out with friends, you should be doing water in between your drinks. Okay. So there's that. Um because I know it's legal, so you shouldn't be crossfading. You should not mix the two. No. And never, ever, ever, ever drink beer and then cocktails. Yep. I actually have a saying by that. Ever, ever. Beer before liquor, never sicker, liquor before beer, in the clear. Yeah. So don't do it. Oh, yeah. No, I definitely live by that. Um this might be because I'm young and I'm broke. Uh, but if I buy a drink of alcohol, I'm finishing all of it. Well, there's that in the beginning, and then after that, it's because liquor's expensive. It is everything as expensive. Well, yeah, but especially liquor bad. Yeah. Like the taxes on liquor. Have you gone to concert? Oh, yeah. Oh, it's so bad. It's so bad. Like even going to bars. Like, yeah, I'm I'm pre-gaming shooters. I'm speaking shooters in. Yeah, you have to. Yeah. Yeah. There's no way that you're you could otherwise it's like, I'm gonna go out and dance for a while. Yeah. If I go to a club. Right.$300 night. Well, it's insane. I can't. And that's not even a lot. So yeah, like if I'm if I'm making like liquor drinks at home, oh you know, I'm sure it's finishing as much as I can. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. That's gonna be our, we're gonna be in rehab and we were like, it was too expensive. We had to finish it. Oh, we had to drink it, guys. Now let's spin. Let's Okay. Oh yeah. And then if it lands on host pick. Another margarine. There we go. Host pick. Post pick. Host pick. Alright, now pick the lottery numbers. Oh, I wish. What would you do with all the money if you ever won the lottery? That'd be simple. I would buy a house on a shit ton of land. Like a shit ton. Like 60 acres. I'd have my own like dirt bike track. I would have farm animals. They would be separate from each other. I would make an entire little village. Right. I'd have myself a um like a family compound. It would be a compound. I was gonna say like a like a little hippie compound. Yeah. And I would have just everyone would have little village houses. And in the center would be an outdoor kitchen, very large outdoor kitchen, huge fire pit seating area. That's where we would all like convene. Okay. But we'd have our own little homes and yards for our animals, dirt by track all around that bitch. Nice. Okay, cool, cool. Probably a pond. Gotta have some water. You always gotta have some ducks. Yeah. You do. Yeah. That's that's what I would do with that. Okay. Okay. Yeah. What about you? What would I do if I won the lottery? First off, I would tell no one. Oh, that's the first. You tell no one you're done for. Yeah. I would hire probably one of the most expensive financial attorneys. Oh, that's a lawyer and a financial advisor. Okay. I would pay off all of my. Debt. Oh, that's a given. Yeah. Pay off all my debt. Um, I would buy myself a car. Doesn't have to be too fancy or too high-end or anything, just something that could get me around and potentially future kids. Would it be a Tesla? Absolutely not.

unknown 22:20

Oh, thank you.

SPEAKER_01 22:21

No Teslas, no cyber tribes. Oh my gosh. No, so I would probably end up getting something like a Nissan, like a rogue. Okay. Okay, so like a or like a sedan or not a sedan, an SUV or something like that. Um, I would get myself a nice little pickup truck. Oh, what kind? Like I'm I am the Tacoma right now, actually. Okay, so newer. A little bit, yeah. A Toyota Tacoma.

SPEAKER_02 22:49

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 22:49

Um I like I like the Fords, I like the Rams and everything, but they're just so big. They're so big. And I I mean, yeah, I can drive a Ford F-150. I can back up a Ford F-150 hella good into a parking spot. But it's just it's so big. Yeah. There's there's no reason. What are you gonna do with it? Exactly. I mean, it would be nice to haul shit, but just get myself a good size people to haul for you. Exactly. So a nice little Tacoma. So a little bit on the newer end, four door, nice cab, nice bed, my little Tacoma. I like it. Um I would go to school. Oh, I would go to school and not have any student loans. That's amazing. How nice would that be? That would be amazing. To go to school, get a degree, not have any student loans? Yeah. Yeah. What would you go to school for? Oh gosh, that's such a hard question. I'm waffling um because I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up. That's okay. You know what? It is a myth that you have to have that figured out. That's yeah, that's valid. It is. I mean, because how can you figure that out when you don't even know who you are? Exactly. Exactly. And I mean, I've bounced between so many career paths. For a while, I wanted to be a cosmetologist. For a while, I wanted to be a collegiate level history professor. That's that's still kind of in the books. I would still love to do that. Um, I would love to be a lawyer. All right. Host. It's your pick. Oh no. Let's do that vodka crayon, let's knock it out. Oh yeah, I forgot about that one. Trying to trying to ignore that one. So a good vodka crayon is vodka and cranberry juice. And they're actually usually usually made in smaller glasses like the one we have. Alright. You ready to say when? Yo no. It's your turn, Lola, please. Okay. That's a good pour, Lola. That's good. Girl, I've down almost three drinks. You need to catch up. That's because you keep taking them, you what? How am I supposed to you're like hand it over here? Well, because you're not touching it. And so I'm like, here. I'm still drinking this one, and you're like, hand me that one. Hand me the next one. I'm like, double fist and drinks over here. Alright. Give that one a taste. It's a pretty pink color. I do like to say in the beginning, she said she would be the most trashed one. Did I say that all the way in the beginning? That's a strong body of crayons. Wait, maybe you need to stir it. Oh yeah. Okay. Alright, try it now. Also, I'm sure say when judgment is getting off the more we drink. Oh, that's a lot better. Okay. Yeah. Yeah, that's a lot better. Stir it. Stir your drinks. Stir your drinks. Alrighty. Out of all the drinks we made, which one's your favorite? The margarita. The margarita. You can't go wrong with a classic margarita. It's so good. I think we just did like the perfect measurements, too. Our heart definitely told us what we needed. Yeah. Alrighty. Margaritas delives. Well, this was so fun. We're gonna go ahead and finish these. But if you liked what you saw here today, feel free to comment, like, subscribe. Text in. Yeah, text in. Your stories. Or your favorite go-to club drinks. Happy St. Paddy's Day. Happy St. Paddy's Day. That's gonna be the day before we drop the app. So that's today, girlfriend. No, St. Paddy's Day is is on Tuesday. What is the date today? The episode drops on Wednesday. No, what is the date today? That's Tuesday. I actually don't know what the date is, and I pinched a few people today. Don't tell them. That's right. Tomorrow's the 17th. Yeah. Yeah, it's it's now Tuesday. Because it hit midnight. Happy Zay Paddy's Day. Wear green. Don't get pinched. Have a good day, everybody. Alrighty. This is the Drunken Pack Cacti Podcast with Viv and Lola. We'll catch you on the flip side. Bye guys.