Christians and Social Media: 15 Biblical Rules

Christians are lobbing grenades at each other online while claiming to follow the Prince of Peace. Something is seriously off.

Here are 15 biblical rules for how Christians should carry themselves on social media, straight from Ephesians 4:29-32. Guardrails, practical tips, and some real talk about keyboard courage and mistaking followers for fruit.

Social media is never neutral. You're either building people up or tearing them down.

What we cover:

• Why Christians compartmentalize their faith from their online behavior
• Is it gossip? Is it edifying? Would Christ be honored? (5 guardrails)
• Why keyboard courage is cowardice
• Why a big following doesn't equal faithfulness
• How to leverage your platform for God's glory

📖 Key Text: Ephesians 4:29-32

🎙 Podcast: [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2543106]

 📧 Substack: [https://substack.com/@kingdaddybatman]

Twitter: [https://x.com/KingDaddyBatman]

#ChristianSocialMedia #BibleTeaching #Discipleship

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:13

What's good, everybody? Glad to be back on here making some podcasts. I decided to take a brief little break, but back at it now. In this episode, I would like to discuss just some thoughts I have and some practical tips and wisdom on how we as disciples of Christ should utilize social media, but also how we should conduct ourselves over social media. This is a topic I'm sure many of you have wrestled with, have thought through, have even been guilty of maybe crossing the line at some point. But I have a bit of a love-hate relationship with social media over the years. I mean, let's just go back to, you know, the past couple of years, right? So let's look at George Floyd, uh, a couple of presidencies, let's look at COVID and just how Christians just lobbed grenades at each other online. I mean, that wasn't new just to that unique season. I mean, that's something we've seen since the advent of social media. We even have a term now called cyberbullying. And so this is an important topic. And I think a lot of Christians have the same type of mindset as those in the world and how they conduct themselves over social media. And one thing in particular that concerns me is it seems, I'm I'm thoroughly convinced of this, there are a lot of Christians, whether they're quote unquote celebrity pastors and authors or Christians, or just, you know, the broader evangelical church at large, seem to have a clear disconnect in their faith in Christ and exuding the fruits of the Spirit and walking in a manner worthy of the gospel. There's like a detachment, a gaping hole between that and how they speak online, how they speak of others online, what they choose to post, the heart behind what they're posting. And that is really awkward to me. Like how Christians just compartmentalize, well, yes, holiness is important. And, you know, how I talk is important. I want to honor the Lord with my life. I'm a living sacrifice. But then once they start typing on a keyboard, all that goes out the window, and people are slandering each other, tearing people down, arguing in comment sections, bashing other Christians they disagree with. And I'm just puzzled, like, man, how on earth does our discipleship not carry over to our presence online? And so I'm gonna start by reading Ephesians 4, 29 through 32. And what I want to do is begin with number one, what are some guardrails that we should consider establishing to guard our hearts, to maybe even examine our hearts before we post something and ask, like, hey, is this unwise or is it even sinful? And there's many texts we can look at, but one in particular is Ephesians chapter four, verses 29 through 32. Now, to set this up, uh, you might be familiar with the concept of gospel indicatives and imperatives. So the indicatives of scripture are propositional truths. These are statements of fact about one's identity in Christ, your union with Christ, the fact that you're a new creation and you've been purchased by the blood of Jesus and you have inherited all these spiritual blessings from the Father. And so you see this pattern in the New Testament where the authors will remind their audience of who they are in Christ, who they belong to, their great salvation, and use that as like motivation to then get into the imperatives, which would be the commands and exhortations that we are to do in light of our identity in Christ. And so here's an example in Ephesians, after chapters one through three, where Paul is unpacking a bunch of beautiful rich gospel doctrine, he transitions in chapter four to start giving instructions on brothers and sisters, in light of all that rich gospel truth that's true of you, if you're in Christ, here's how you should live. Here's how you should conduct yourselves in your marriage, and how you should forgive each other, and in our text, how you should speak. So in Ephesians chapter four, beginning in verse 29, the text says, No foul language should come from your mouth, but only what is good for building up someone in need, so that it gives grace to those who hear, and don't grieve God's Holy Spirit. You were sealed by him for the day of redemption. Let all bitterness, anger, and wrath, shouting and slander be removed from you along with all malice, and be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another just as God also forgave you in Christ. Now notice a few quick things. Number one, Paul is giving commands. These are not suggestions. He's not saying this is fortune cookie Christianity, like, hey, read these thoughts of mine, and you know, if it works for you, go ahead and make sure that no foul language comes out of your mouth. No, these are commands. Paul is saying if you are in Christ, you are, as he says later in chapter five of Ephesians, be imitators of God. So when we are conducting ourselves on social media, a good rule of thumb is Am I being an imitator of God? Because Paul is giving explicit commands there to let no foul language come out of our mouths. But rather, he gives a positive command, which is hey, only say stuff that's going to edify other people. That's gonna communicate spiritual good to other people, that's gonna build people up. And so here's what I got for you. I got I got five things here that I think are helpful guardrails to examine your heart before you share something online, starting with number one, which is to ask yourself is what I'm about to post or share gossip or slander? Is it gossip or slander? Because both are sinful. It's not okay to share something online about somebody else that you don't know is truthful or is slanderous about someone else's character and it's demeaning their dignity. That is sinful. So before you retweet something, reshare something, post an article or a video or podcast or whatever it may be, ask yourself, is this gossip or slander? Because passing along information that damages somebody else is dishonoring to the Lord and is sinful. We don't want to make a practice of that. And in some cases, even if the gossip is true, that doesn't mean it's God honoring to share it in a public forum. And so ask ourselves, we have to ask ourselves, is this gossip or slander? But number two, ask the question, is this edifying? Think about what Paul just said in Ephesians 4, 29 through 32. Is this edifying? Because if it's not edifying, well, friends, the opposite of that is it's non-edifying, it's discouraging. It might be tearing somebody down, it might be unwholesome, and therefore the Lord is not pleased. So if it's not edifying, then as a disciple of Christ, why on earth would you be sharing it? I mean, think about when Paul said, don't grieve the spirit. Think about that. Why would we say anything or even conduct ourselves? And we're all broken sinners, none of us is perfect. You know, we're we're we're we're striving for faithfulness with the spirit's help. But man, why would we voluntarily, intentionally share something or do something that would grieve the very heart of God? And so ask yourself, is this edifying? If it doesn't build up somebody else, then we need to ask ourselves, what are we doing then? What am I doing? Why am I sharing this if I know it's not gonna have an edifying effect? But third, ask the question, would Christ be honored by this? And that's not a rhetorical question. Like ask that question. Would whatever you're sharing or whatever you're posting online for public consumption, would it put us, would it put a smile on Jesus' face when he reads it or when he watches it or when he listens to it? Right? Whatever you're on a public front-facing, you know, outward facing uh mode, whatever you're sharing, would it put a smile on the Savior's face? Would he say, that blesses my heart? And that's gonna bless uh my people, or that's gonna maybe expose people to my truth who have yet to trust in me. And so ask the question, would this honor Christ? And sit with that question before you post, because if the answer is no, well then I think you already know whether you should publicly be posting it or engaging in it or not. But number four, ask yourself Am I chasing recognition or am I feeding envy? Am I chasing recognition or fate or you know, entertaining envy? Your heart motive behind your message or what you share and post matters. Why are you sharing what you're sharing? Is it to draw attention to yourself? Is it to make people think more highly of you than what you really are? Is it to try to hold up a certain image? Let's just be honest here. We are conditioned to do this very thing. Social media literally trains us to share edited highlight reels of our life that are not real. And I've been a pastor long enough to sometimes see members who struggle with, well, I think I'm not as great of a mother as I think I should be, or I'm not doing a great job as a dad. And you start having conversations with them and you realize, you know, they're sharing. Well, I see this person online, they're doing this and they're posting that. And as a pastor, you might have some inside knowledge of, like, well, you might think that that brother or sister is living the best life, but actually, they're really struggling. Their marriage is an absolute shambles. You know, they're going through this, they're going through that. But all you see is these edited versions of their lives that they're sharing. Think about it. No one shares their real life on social media on an ongoing basis, right? We always share the highlights of, oh, here's our family playing through the lilies, or here's a sporting event where my kid hit the game-winning shot, or whatever it may be. But no one, no one goes live in the middle of a fight in their marriage, right? No one goes live or posts video on Instagram a reel of themselves when they went too far and gave into sinful anger and yelled at their kid, and now their child is crying and they have to go repent and confess their sin and ask for their child's forgiveness. You don't see that stuff. You see the mom uh meal planning for the entire month kind of thing. You see, you know, the dad spending time with his kid, and those are all good things. But just keep in mind that can be a temptation. There could be a temptation rather to post for the sake of I want attention towards me. I want to keep checking how many likes did I get on that particular post, how many people are commenting and resharing and subscribing, kind of a thing. And so we got to be on guard against that. And we got to be on guard against envy. You know, looking at somebody else online, and now I'm sinning in my heart because I'm jealous of maybe what they have or what they're able to do, or I'm I'm coveting what they have, and now I'm discontent with what the Lord has blessed me with. And so make sure you guard your heart from am I chasing recognition or feeding envy? Because both are sinful. But lastly, a fifth guardrail would be would I say this to this person's face? Or am I being a coward? I am blown away. Maybe this is how I grew up. I grew up in the inner city and like a lot of stuff I see online, like, man, that stuff would not take place in certain communities I grew up around. But for example, you have people who will say some of the most just disrespectful, unloving, unkind things about another Christian purchased by the blood of Jesus simply because they disagree with them on something. And they will tear these people down, they will make sarcastic or slanderous or just outright disrespectful and unloving comments about them. And it could be someone they don't even know, they've never met. Maybe it's an author who takes a particular theological standpoint and they just disagree with that. And so they just deride these people online and in the comments section. And I'm like, if that person attended your church, if they were a member of your church, would you, if you were sitting next to them in a pew and service ended and you turn around and start having, you know, conversation, checking in on each other, would you talk to them the same way you talk about them online? Because if so, I mean, let's just be honest, that's cowardice. It's disrespectful and unloving, but man, you're just being, that's whack. Like you're being a coward. Don't say stuff about people online that you wouldn't say to them to their face. And so keyboard, keyboard courage isn't courage at all. Don't use your screen as a shield. Don't be a Christian coward. If you wouldn't say it across the dinner table, you have no business saying it across a screen. So those are just five guardrails to just ask yourself before you post something to make sure, hey, let me make sure I'm judging my heart motivations well. I'm examining my own heart to make sure I'm not sinfully uh posting this or have a sinful posture behind what I'm posting. But okay, so then if none of those things line up, well then what are some other helpful tips on how we should conduct ourselves online? Some of this has been influenced by a brother named Legan Duncan, who many years ago I remember reading an article he shared about uh 10 tips he has for himself and how he conducts himself over social media. And I've revisited revisited that article over the years and have thought through that and edited to make this my own. Here are 10 practical tips to consider as you share things online or carry yourself online. Starting with number one, use your platform to build people up and point them towards God's truth and sound teaching. Use your platform as a measure of influence, no matter how big or small, to point people towards God's truth and sound teaching. Your feed is a small but real influence, and you should use it like it matters. So when you share stuff, you keep in mind that I might be edifying other people who follow me who might decide to listen to this particular person or read that book on parenting or discipling, or you know, listen and subscribe to that podcast that has real good doctrine about the church and sanctification and all these things. And so keep in mind your social media could be an influential, uh influential tool to help other people in their discipleship. And so leverage that to the glory of God and for the edification of others. But number two, make Christ your constant. If Jesus is not the constant center of your feed, then then something is off, right? What I mean by that is if you never post anything about your faith, if your faith somehow just never shows, you know, in your social media presence, there could be some questions worth asking there, right? Like, are you are you ashamed of Christ? Are you not, are you just voluntarily choosing not to just make known that you're a Christian? And if so, why not? You know, it's almost like baptism, right? What one of the beautiful aspects of baptism is it's a church's act of affirming one's profession of faith, but it's also an individual's act of publicly marking themselves off from the world and saying, I belong to Christ and his people. And so, yeah, ask yourself, like, man, am I making Christ constant in what I post? And I'm I'm not one of those Christians who thinks everything you post has to be about Jesus. That's not what I'm saying. But what I am saying is, hey, to some degree, a constant should be Christ is the center because Christ is the center of your everyday life. And so, how can he not show up in everything that you do? But number three, ask, or rather, a tip is the urge to respond to everything online is a trap. Restraint is a fruit of the spirit. Not every provocation online requires your response, requires your thoughts, and not every comment needs your correction. I wish so many more Christians just had some self-restraint in this regard. Just because someone posts something whack, just because someone posts something that you disagree with, just because someone posts something that you think is foolish does not require your response. I can guarantee you, if you just give it a couple of days, people would have moved on and completely forgot about that thing. And yet some people get so impassioned they feel like they got to jump in the commons and defend orthodoxy, defend all of evangelicalism. And listen, there could be someone out there, and I'm sure maybe there are some testimonies, but I have yet to meet anybody who said, you know what, I came to faith in Christ, or I had my theology corrected by arguing with people in the comments. Someone disagreed with me and came after me, and we went back and forth, and now my whole theology got corrected. No, you just get two prideful people quarreling online, and it looks extremely immature and unchrist-like. And it seems so many people are just completely content with it. And I don't understand why. I mean, the Bible commands us to only speak words that are edifying, not to be quarrelsome, not to give in to anger and wrath. Even, you know, there's no justification. I think sometimes, maybe subtly we think we're justified because we're quote unquote defending truth. But friends, that's not how you defend truth. You don't defend truth with pride and anger. And so the urge to respond to everything is a trap. I mean, listen, guard your peace. I mean, listen, I could care less about a negative comment. I could care less about, you know, people. I've had this happen to me. I've had people say things I didn't actually say. I've had people misrepresent my ideas and in negative ways and come at me. And you know what? I'm like, okay, I'll pray for you. God be with you. And I move on and I sleep perfectly well at night. And so don't fall into the trap. But number four, you don't have to weigh in on every controversy. Jumping in on everything isn't courage. So this is somewhat similar to number three, but you the world doesn't need your opinion on opinion on every topic. Feel free to just scroll past things and keep your peace. And so guard against filling the need to weigh in on every controversy. There are entire groups on Facebook, for example, dedicated to debating specific topics. And it's just people every day going back and forth. You know, for example, imagine a group where Baptists are constantly arguing with paedo-Baptists over believers' baptism or infant baptism. And the whole purpose of the group is we're gonna keep lobbying our grenades to your side, and the other side lobs grenades to the other side. It's it's immaturity and foolishness. Number five, remember that you're talking to people not performing for a crowd. Speak online to persuade not to win the room. The goal is not likes, but it's people growing in their understanding of the truth. So if you're carrying yourself online in a way that you're not being relational, you're not being a brother or sister in Christ to others online, but rather you view people as a crowd to just gain more followers or whatever it may be, you know, to gain likes and things like that, but you're not treating people as image bearers who you're trying to help understand God's truth better so that they can, you know, continue to more fully walk in a manner worthy of the gospel, well then guard against that. That is not loving. And so don't talk to people as if you're performing for a crowd, but rather be a positive influence to help people know Jesus better. All right, number six, if the person your followers see online isn't the person your family lives with, well, then you have an integrity problem. If online credibility outpaces your offline character, well, then that's that's a warning sign. If the people who live with you, who know you well outside of the camera or off of uh social media, if they realize that you're someone very different than who you are over your online presence, that is a significant issue. That means you might be performing for the masses. It might mean you're struggling with hypocrisy. It might mean you're gifted at or you know how to articulate doctrine well that you're not actually living out truth of God's word that hasn't really shaped your heart and is molding you into more godliness and Christ-like integrity, but rather you just know how to communicate Christ's words online. That that's not who you want to be, I would hope. Number seven, a big following is isn't the same as wisdom or accountability. Therefore, be careful who you amplify. All right. So don't hand a megaphone to someone who's only a platform on a screen, or who only has a platform on a screen. What do I mean by that? Just because someone has a bunch of subscribers or a bunch of followers or gets a ton of likes and reshares of their content, that does not necessarily mean that God is pleased with them, that they have God's favor, that they are faithfully handling the Bible, that they're godly. It just means a lot of people like their stuff, but it doesn't necessarily equal godliness. Just like you see in the Old Testament, for example, and in the gospel accounts, uh, the Jews seem to have this theology that if somebody was wealthy, that equaled that they had God's favor. And that was further the furthest thing from the truth. Now, that doesn't mean wealthy people don't have God's favor or are. Not godly people. But they had this misconception of, well, clearly, if God has allowed them to be blessed materially, then that means He has a special measure of favor and love for them that he doesn't uh bestow upon others. That's just poor Bible knowledge. And so just because someone has a large following does not automatically mean faithfulness and fruitfulness. So be very careful who you magnify with your influence online. Be careful who you're sharing with other people because listen, just how the New Testament warned us against false teachers, just like the New Testament warned us that hey, even from among the church body will arise ravenish wolves who are going to seek to lead people astray to follow them. Well, guess what? In the modern era, they're online. And so be careful who you are magnifying or amplifying with your platform because you might be leading someone down a dangerous road spiritually. And this is why we need to be very uh just careful and discerning here. We live in a day and age, anybody can have a platform. All you need is a Wi-Fi connection and the ability to upload something, and you can have a following. So, I mean, right now I'm recording a video in my home. It's like I don't no one needs uh YouTube or Facebook, Instagram, Twitter. Like these platforms don't require, well, you gotta you gotta have a pastoral authority over you before you can launch your platform or hey, we need you to submit a you know a seminary degree or to show that you've gone through some theological training before you can host content on Christianity in the Bible. No, as long as you can just post something, anyone across the globe can share their thoughts and opinions. And I have heard a ton of whack stuff online by people who have very large followings who are grossly mishandling the Bible, and yet they get a ton of likes, they get a ton of shares, and people, you know, resharing their content. And I'm like, that's not even remotely close to what the Bible actually says. And so I'm harping on this one uh for a while, but it's important. So be careful who you magnify because just because someone has a large following does not mean that they are being fruitful. Okay. Number eight, your social media feed or platform doesn't have to be a seminary classroom. This is circling back to what I said earlier. It is okay to be a Christian who has fun, who enjoys God's creation and all his good gifts to his people. So it's okay to post your family vacation, to post that trip with your kids or that dinner you had or that fun activity you did with your friends, and you don't have to teach some Bible lesson, you don't have to drop a scripture in there. It's fine to do those things, but I think sometimes some Christians think every single thing I post has to always be about Jesus. It's like, listen, your whole life is about Jesus. Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, you do it to the glory of God. That doesn't mean you have to explicitly reference a scripture or Jesus or the church and everything that you share online. It's okay to share a highlight clip of a Lakers game or that football game or whatever it may be. That's fine. It's okay. Your social media presence doesn't have to be a seminary classroom. And keep in mind, enjoying God's good gifts and displaying, you know, God's glory and creation and all these other things that God gives us liberties in Christ to pursue and enjoy is an act of worship. Enjoy God's good creation and don't feel guilty about it because gratitude and joy are a part of uh the Christian witness to number nine, give other people online the benefit of the doubt. None of us is God. We don't know people's hearts. So therefore, we should not judge sinfully people's heart motivations because you're not the Lord and you don't know their motivations unless they communicate them to you. So keep in mind words people text on a screen don't carry over their tone of voice. It doesn't carry over nuance. And so be very careful to make quick assumptions, to make rash judgments, and then to quickly respond without knowing someone's heart. So before you assume someone meant the worst, ask. Ask, hey, what did you mean by this? What were your intentions when you communicated this? If you have a relationship or if if you had a means of communicating with someone and they might actually respond, give the benefit of the doubt because that's what Christians do. Love hopes all things, believes all things, right? And rejoices in the truth. And so whenever we make rash judgments or when we judge people's hearts, oh, so-and-so did this because they're just jealous, or they did this because they're this, or they're just trying to manipulate people to do it's like, how do you know that? Like there might be some external, you know, fruit from some decisions they've made that might give you strong assumptions that that's their heart motivation, but you don't know for a fact unless they tell you that. And so give the benefit of the doubt. That's what we should be striving for. But number 10, last tip don't mistake followers for fruit. This is somewhat similar to what I said earlier, but don't mistake followers for fruit. Engagement is not discipleship. A viral post is not the same as fruit and faithfulness. And make sure you follow people and benefit from people who you have confidence are faithful, right? So here's what I mean by uh, you know, don't mistake followers for fruit. Just because someone is a uh someone online who has a strong presence and a lot of followers, subscribers, whatever you want to call it, that doesn't mean that they're the most godly person you've met. Because keep in mind, you don't know these people. You don't know if they love their spouses, you don't know if they love their kids and actually disciple them. You don't know if they're actually a committed member to a local church where they have elders who shepherd their souls and have some uh oversight caring for them and where there's accountability. There are people who have large followings who tell you how to live your Christian life, and yet they're not a member of a local church. They look down on the church, they look down on ministry, and they see their online presence as a ministry. This is their ministry, this is my church kind of a thing. And they want people to come listen to them on how to live the Christian life and to listen to them as their teacher or preacher online. And the Bible knows nothing of that, right? The the primacy of the local church still reigns as supreme, not some online influencer. And sadly, we live in an age where it is tempting for Christians to think that they can supplement church life and community with Christians who actually know them and can come alongside them in life. They think they can supplement that with, well, you know, I have this pastor I listen to online. I just listen to his sermons or his podcasts, and and that's good. I don't really need to join a church. I get my my faith, you know, through a plethora of teachers that I listen to on a regular. That's dangerous. And listen, I'm a guy who I benefit from listening to listening to faithful teachers online, on YouTube, on different podcasts, and we should avail ourselves of that. Ephesians also talks about how God has given to the church, local churches, the gift of pastors and teachers and evangelists and so on and so forth. So that is a good thing from the chief shepherd of the church. However, the Bible also says that we clearly are to be committed to a local community of believers whom can know us and help us live out our Christian lives and keep us accountable. And so if someone is saying, and like I said, I listen to a lot of people, but keep in mind, you know, I always try to keep at the back of my mind, I don't know any of these people. I don't know if they're just a gifted communicator when they deliver a message, but when they get home, they don't love their wives, they're not pursuing godliness, they have serious sin that goes unchecked. And, you know, we end up hearing sometimes, unfortunately, these same individuals who have a significant fall and shipwreck their ministry. And then all of a sudden all this stuff comes out of, oh, wow, they were never even connected to a church, or, you know, they were in disagreement with their church and just wanted to do their own thing. And so be on guard from thinking that followers equal fruit. All this to say, and I could give a list of 10 more things, but I think those 10 are pretty sufficient. But keep in mind how you conduct yourself on social media is never neutral. You're either putting a smile on Jesus' face or you're grieving the heart of God. And so keep that in mind. You're never neutral. You're either building people up or you might be tearing people down. But also can keep in mind that the same spirit that governs your tongue should be governing your thumbs. Just if you wouldn't say something to somebody's face, don't say it online. If you wouldn't say it to a member in your church after or before a service because you know it's not God honoring and, you know, would dishonor the Lord or cause pain to that individual, why would you communicate something sim in a similar fashion over social media? Like what's the difference, right? So let's let's be on guard and remember the word of God tells us that my wife loves to remind me of this, but we will give an account to the Lord for every word that we speak, which includes every word that you communicate online as well. And so keep in mind you have more influence than you think. So use it faithfully. Use it to build people up, to exalt the glory of Jesus Christ and his gospel and his bride, the church. And keep Ephesians 4, 29 through 32 in mind. Am I imparting words of grace that build people up for the glory of God and for others' spiritual good? Am I making Jesus look attractive, like a treasure to those who might follow me, who have yet to trust in Jesus Christ? That that is a way to leverage everything in your sphere of influence for the glory of God and for the good of others. Let me know any other practical tips maybe you have in the comments about how you've learned to conduct yourself over social media. And if you found this helpful, please subscribe, like, and share this podcast so that as I said earlier, it can be a positive influence to help others follow Jesus and to magnify his name. Thanks.