The Danger of Outsourcing Your Discernment

Have you ever realized that you might be trusting spiritual advice more than God Himself?

In this episode of the Joyful Rebel Podcast, Rachel Harris explores the subtle but powerful way we sometimes outsource our discernment—handing authority over our spiritual decisions to mentors, leaders, or voices that sound wise.

Through the story of Hagar in Genesis and a deeply personal moment during a spiritual retreat, Rachel shares the question that stopped her in her tracks:

"When will you stop trusting man over Me?"

This episode explores what happens when God interrupts the voices we’ve relied on and calls us back into direct relationship, trust, and discernment.

You’ll also learn a simple reflective practice called The Authority Check, designed to help you pause before reacting and reconnect with God’s voice within you.

If you've ever second-guessed something you felt God telling you…
 If wise counsel has ever made you doubt your own discernment…
 If you're learning how to trust God more deeply…

This conversation is for you.

In This Episode

• The hidden danger of outsourcing spiritual discernment
• What Hagar’s wilderness encounter reveals about being truly seen by God
• The moment Rachel heard God ask: “When will you stop trusting man over Me?”
• Why StoryShift™ moments change everything before circumstances do
• A simple practice called The Authority Check

Try This Practice This Week

Before reacting, deciding, or responding, pause and ask yourself:

• Who am I letting have the final word right now?
• Is this voice moving me toward clarity or contraction?
• What would it look like to return authority to God?

Permission Slips From This Episode

You are allowed to:

• Trust what God told you
 • Stop disappearing in the presence of authority
 • Remember that you are seen

Next Episode

Next week we explore what happens when the Joyride™ stage of the ReStory Arc™ gives way to resistance—and how to stay rooted when the roar gets loud.

Resources:
20 Soul Sparks To Feel Like You Again - a simple list of tiny, doable moments designed to help you reconnect with joy, curiosity, peace, and play
https://rachel-harris-online.kit.com/cd8d06c001

Hidden Stories Inventory- a guide to help you notice the stories that have been shaping you https://rachel-harris-online.kit.com/hiddeninventory 

My Substack Page, The Petal and The Plot: https://restorystudiorachel.substack.com/

Are YOU A Joyful Rebel? https://rachelharrisonline.com/joyful-rebel

Transcript

Hey friends, welcome back to the Joyful Rebel podcast. 

Today, we're talking about outsourcing our discernment. And we're talking about Hagar—not the sanitized Sunday school version, but the woman who found herself displaced, unseen, standing on the other side of a door that she was never meant to walk through. We're talking about what happens when God meets you there, not to shame you, not to rush you, but to gently—and firmly—reclaim His authority in your life.

There are moments when something shifts internally, even if nothing has changed externally yet. You see differently, you feel differently, you can't unknow what you now know. That internal crossing, that quiet, irreversible awareness is what I call a StoryShift™. And Hagar lives right there. 

Hagar didn't choose her circumstances. She was used, overlooked, sent away. She didn't run because she was being rebellious. She ran because she was trying to survive. And when she collapses in the wilderness, when she prepares to disappear, that's where God meets her. Not with correction, not with a lecture, but with presence. 

Genesis tells us that Hagar gives God my favorite name in all of Scripture at this moment. She names him El Roi, the God who sees me—not the God who immediately fixes it, not the God who explains it all neatly, the God who sees. 

And friend, that matters. 

Because being truly seen, being known and understood, it not only settles something within you, it gives comfort and validation even in the struggle. And it restores agency. 

I had a moment like that about a year ago during a series of spiritual retreats. I was in a season of deep, honest soul work. I was asking hard questions. I was learning how to feel, to deal, to heal. I was listening, really listening— 

Well, I was trying my best to listen anyway. I have a tendency to be really, really good at filling up the silence…but I was listening. 

And this time I heard God clearly without a single doubt. He asked me to be baptized again, a believer's baptism. And this wasn't the first time that He nudged me toward this. Twenty years earlier on a church pilgrimage to Greece, I'd felt the same invitation. But back then, for some reason, I decided that it had to be in the River Jordan. And since I haven't been to Israel yet, it's never happened. Honestly, I kind of forgot about it. But God hadn't. 

In this season of restoration, reclamation, and redemption, I felt His presence in ways I never had before. I knew His voice and I knew what He was asking. It wasn't a fleeting thought or an emotional impulse. It was a steady, familiar nudge that I'd felt once before. An invitation that had been waiting in the wings patiently for me to say yes.

So, I shared this with a mentor, someone I respect deeply, and I expected excitement, curiosity, support. What I got was doubt, a gentle prompt—a spiritual sounding one, the kind that feels wise. She suggested that I might be rushing; in fact, she implied that God had nudged her with the idea that maybe I was chasing joy instead of sitting in the hard, because indeed, this season and this retreat had brought up a lot of hard. 

But even though I knew that that wasn't the case, that I was chasing obedience, if anything, not joy. And even though I had without a doubt, felt that nudge? Just like that. All that belief started to wobble. 

I smiled, I nodded, and I thanked her. And I walked toward the door. I only took a handful of steps when God's voice rose inside me, clearer and steadier than anything I'd felt before or since. 

"When will you stop trusting man over Me?" 

That’s what I heard. 

I’m going to say it again, because I’ve been hearing it for the last year…

“When will you stop trusting man over Me?”

Boom. Mic drop, right? 

It wasn't angry, it wasn't condemning, just unmistakable. 

And in that moment, I realized something painful and freeing all at once. 

For years, I've been outsourcing my discernment and calling it humility.

That's what Hagar faces too, even though it's easy to miss it with everything else that she's going through, everything else that's happening in her story. Multiple authorities have spoken over her life. Cultural power, household power, human voices telling her who she is and what she's allowed to want, until God meets her personally. 

Her circumstances don't instantly change after that, but her orientation does. She realizes, I'm not invisible. I'm not forgotten. I'm not wrong for wanting relief. 

In the ReStory Arc™ that I teach, the StoryShift™ comes before the solution. 

For Hagar, the door closed on the lie that I'm alone. And even though her circumstances remain pretty complicated, she's no longer confused about who she belongs to.

Here's what I want to say, lovingly but clearly. Wise counsel matters, but surrendered authority belongs to God. 

Discernment is not outsourcing your knowing. It's learning to recognize God's voice within you. 

Fear will always push us toward human certainty. Faith calls us back to divine intimacy. That quiet, Fatherly correction I experienced that day, it was a line in the sand moment that I'll never forget. 

Here's a simple practice that you can try this week. I call this tool The Authority Check. 

Before you act…before you fight, flee, freeze, fawn, or flop…I invite you to pause and to ask yourself: 

Who am I letting have the final word right now? 

Is this voice moving me toward clarity or contraction? 

What would it look like to return authority, to return trust, to God? 

To return trust to my own inner knowing, my belief, my gut sense, the place where I sense holy nudges, even if others don't understand it.

You don't have to decide anything yet. You don't need to take any steps. 

Just notice who's been holding the pen in your life story. 

So, friend, let me ask you this:

Where have you already crossed a threshold internally, even if you haven't taken a visible step yet? 

That awareness, that's sacred.

Here's your permission slips for the week:

-          You're allowed to trust what God told you, even when others don't understand it.

-          You're allowed to stop disappearing in the presence of authority. 

-          You are seen. 

And for those of you wondering, yes, I did eventually honor that nudge. It took longer than I'd like to admit, but that's a story for another day and another episode. 

Next week, we're gonna be talking about what happens when the Joyride™ in the ReStory Arc™ gives way to resistance, and how to stay rooted when the Roar gets loud. 

Until then, walk easy, listen deeply, and don't dim that beautiful light. 

I'll meet you back here.