You Said You Would… So Why Didn't You?

Have you ever promised yourself you were finally going to do it?

Start the business.
Write the book.
Prioritize your health.
Launch the idea.
Set the boundary.
Take the leap.

And then... you didn't.

In this honest and empowering episode of Unplugged with Pam | Breakfast Club Edition, Pamela Pacheco tackles one of the biggest obstacles standing between people and the life they say they want: the gap between intention and action.

The truth is, most people don't fail because they lack talent, resources, or opportunity. They fail because they don't follow through on the commitments they make to themselves.

This episode challenges listeners to examine the excuses, fears, distractions, and limiting beliefs that keep them stuck and offers a powerful reminder that the life you desire is often waiting on the other side of consistent action.

In This Episode:

✨ Why broken promises damage self-confidence
✨ The hidden cost of procrastination and delay
✨ How fear often disguises itself as preparation
✨ Why accountability starts with yourself
✨ The connection between discipline and freedom
✨ How small daily actions create extraordinary results
✨ Why success is built through follow-through, not intention

Pamela shares practical wisdom and personal insights on what it takes to become the type of person who honors their commitments, keeps their word, and creates momentum in every area of life.

Whether you're working toward a personal goal, building a business, strengthening your faith, or pursuing your purpose, this conversation will challenge you to stop making excuses and start making progress.

Key Takeaway:

Every promise you keep to yourself becomes evidence that you can trust yourself.

And confidence isn't built by talking about what you're going to do—it's built by doing it.

If this episode encouraged you, subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who needs the reminder that their next level is waiting on their follow-through.

🎙 Hosted by Pamela Pacheco (Pam The Plug™)

Speaker | Brand Strategist | Entrepreneur | Community Builder

Helping entrepreneurs, leaders, and visionaries build confidence, take action, and create lives aligned with their purpose.

"The difference between where you are and where you want to be is often a promise you haven't kept yet."

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:05

Welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to another episode of Unplugged with Pam Breakfast Club Edition brought to you by Chosen Global, where we don't just talk about growth, we walk in it each and every single time. And this is not a call, this is a room. And if you're joining us for the first time, welcome. If you're joining us once again, welcome home. I remember when I first embarked upon entrepreneurship over a dozen years ago, I was looking forward to rooms like this early in the morning because I know how you start the day, sets your tone for your day. And if you are brand new here and you're listening to us on your way to work, make sure you subscribe to Unplugged with Pam Podcast across all streaming platforms from YouTube to Amazon, Apple, Spotify, Buzz Sprout, you name it. So welcome back, welcome back, welcome back. And today I just woke up with this heavy on my heart. I honestly changed over the entire uh conversation for this morning. And I do apologize. I know we ran into a little bit of technical difficulties, and y'all know it wouldn't be me without me addressing the elephant in the room. However, this one, what I wanted to talk about today, so last week we talked about the most important promise you can keep. And we all agreed that the most important promise you can keep is the promise you make to yourself. Yes, yes, yes, yes. So, what I wanted to ask you, because I had to ask myself this is if you said you would, then why didn't you? If you said you would, why didn't you? And I'm not asking this to come for you. Well, maybe I'm coming for you a little bit like I came for me myself this morning, right? But it's more so to not asking to judge you, I'm asking because if we're being honest, I've been there before. And I know that these types of seasons in my life where I said I was gonna do something and I didn't follow through. Have you ever had those moments that we said we're gonna do X and we just didn't follow through? And if I'm being completely transparent, that is one of the fastest ways to lose trust with yourself, with yourself, because when I remember there was a moment in my in time that I had all of this vision, and I'm talking about like a massive vision, and I had all of the ideas and I had all of the plans, but I was not executing on the level that I thought I was capable of. And I would say things like, oh, I'm gonna post more consistently, and I'm gonna launch this this day, and I'm gonna do this this way, and I'm gonna show up differently, and then life would happen. Or what happens to a lot of us, I got in my head because you know, success is a game of inches, and what's going on up here, and also what's from here to here, right? From your heart space to your mind space, but success is a game of inches, and I remember I'd overthink and I'd just be overthinking it. And because I spend so much time overthinking, I wouldn't do it, and every time I didn't follow through, I just felt it. Have you ever been there? You just you just know you just and you gotta sit with it because and you just gotta feel it not just in my business has this happened or business is, but I had to feel this in my confidence, in my confidence. But I understood this every broken crayon doesn't just delay your results, it damages your self-trust. So when we think about why you're not doing what it is that you said, there's a few, there's a few reasons why I think I know it happened to me. And this is these are reasons that in my coaching and consulting practice when I'm talking to entrepreneurs or business owners or corporations, and dealing with whether I'm dealing with Fortune 500 execs or startup business owners, it's all the same thing, and number one reason why is because we stay operating from our old identity. So you made the promise, but you're still thinking like the old version of you. Have you ever had that? And you and you know, like you know that you know that you know that it was supposed to be different, but what happened is you're still thinking like the old version of you, you're thinking like the version of you, and because you're thinking like you also start showing up like this version of you, right? So you're thinking like the old version of you, the version of you that procrastinates. Yeah, don't laugh at me. English is my second language, okay? The version of you that overthinks, the version of you that plays small. Am I talking to anybody in here? The version of you that thinks you have to shrink in certain places, the version of you that lets your own excuses get the best of your results. And it's interesting because yesterday I was getting the pedicure done and my nail lady, you know, I was like, oh, this is such a cute space. You have it on the side of your like, what's the vision long term? I love asking entrepreneurs and business owners, whether you're 17 or you're 70, like you're gonna get this question from me. What's the vision? Because I'm nosy, but more so is because I'm always looking for ways that I can serve. And when you know you're on assignment, I don't feel I don't feel that it's selsy because at the end of the day, I know I can add value to any human being if they are at a place where they're ready to receive the value added. So whatever your dream is, whatever that vision is for your life and for your family, I know that I can help you bring it to fruition. So I love to ask questions. It's just me, right? I've been this inquisitive soul since I was a kid. So I'm asking her a question. I'm like, well, what's the vision for this long term? And she's like, well, you know, honestly, I just like to do nails. She said, but I don't want to have a shop long term because I know that the shop is going to own me because I wouldn't have the freedom that I want. I said, Oh, so freedom is the end goal. So what does freedom mean to you? And I'm asking questions, asking questions. And she said, Well, you know, one of the things is that I'm gonna start going to the gym more and I'm gonna start prioritizing my health when I have the time that I have that I need. And I said, Okay. Then her friend butts in, and her friend's like, Well, you know, I I I love I love working out, but every time I start, I want to stop. And I said, Okay, so what what do you do to overcome that? Because here here goes me. I'm trying not to, you know, not to be nosy and stuff, right? This is the first time I'm meeting people, they're gonna be like, Man, she can't come back here. So, you know, I'm I'm just letting her talk because I want to know. I you can always tell a lot about a person by the way that they think about things. So I'm like, okay. So she's like, Yeah, well, you know, the reason that I stop is because I just don't have the energy to. And I said, Well, you don't have the energy because you always stop. She's like, Yeah, and I don't have the motivation. I said, You don't have the motivation because you don't continue long enough to see the results. Because I will tell you that anytime, she's like, Yeah, I just don't feel disciplined to. I said, Yeah, nobody does at the beginning. The reality is that when you make something a part of your lifestyle, like health and wellness should be a part of our lifestyles if we want to be in this earth a little longer to accomplish out the great works that God set for us to do, right? So I said, Well, you know, it's really if you let something become a part of your lifestyle, you no longer need to feel the discipline because not doing it would be the same as a part of you not having good hygiene, you're not brushing your teeth, you're not doing the things that you do every day, because it becomes a part of your well-being, it becomes a part of who you are. And when you start not only feeling the results, because working out and exercise helps with all of our happy chemicals from our dopamine to our oxytocin, serotonin, and endorphins, it helps with all of the basic human needs of certainty and security and significance and growth and love and contribution and all of the things. It helps with it helps us with every single aspect of our life. Now, she said, Well, you know, you're right. So she now she's letting her friend talk, and her friend is just like, Yeah, I believe in that too, because I know what whatever you want to put your mind to do, you can't do it from the same person that you were who made that decision. I said, Bingo brings me back to. I know y'all like when you're gonna bring it back, Pam. You're operating from your old identity. So when you want to see new results, whether that be at the gym, whether that be in your business, whether that be in the relationships, whether that be in your boldness, how you show up online, whether that be in any aspect of it, you have to operate from this new version of you. You cannot continue to operate from your old identity because all of the things that you said you were going to do, you're not going to do it. And that's the number one reason that I found why we don't follow through on the things that we said we were going to do. And that goes, that happens in so many, so many, so many scenarios. In fact, it is one of those things that it's like, okay, well, that old version of you knew that you needed to make certain decisions and you needed to do things different so that you can not only show up as the best version of you, but so that it can be in alignment with the goals that it said that you wanted to do in the first place, with the future that you said you had created for yourself in the first place. Well, needless to say, the nail lady and I, we have a conversation pending to do some stuff for her business, but it happened because when people are excited to do things, when you have goals, when you have dreams, when you have all of these things, and you said I'm gonna do this. I believe that God has to test us sometimes to see how bad do we want the things that we said we wanted to do. I don't know. That's just what I believe. Number two, again, you're you're why you're not doing what you said you were, right? Number two, we make emotional decisions, and I'm gonna put we because it's not just you, right? We make we're making emotional decisions. So here's what that looks like, and I'm gonna I'm gonna keep referencing the story, right? Because it says what that looks like is when you're making emotional decisions, you were committed until it got uncomfortable, and then we were tired. So you were committed until you got uncomfortable, and so you got tired, and until it wasn't convenient anymore, and then you negotiated. You not only negotiated with the version of yourself that you said you were becoming, you negotiate with your dreams, you negotiate with your goals, you negotiate with your results, and then now again, it comes back to that little word of the D word, the discipline word. The discipline is doing what you said you would, regardless of how you feel. Well, I'm gonna bring it back to the story that I was having with my nail tech girl and her friend, because the friend said, Yeah, you know, it's uncomfortable. And she said, the the nail tech said, yeah, well, life is about becoming uncomfortable. And I said, Yes, because if you are a person that you're not comfortable, and she said that's why she couldn't work for anybody, because she didn't want to stay comfortable, she didn't want to be complacent. And she said, if I can get comfortable at this salary, I'm never going to think bigger. I remember once hearing a mentor tell me that a salary is like, I think he put it somewhere like a salary is a drug that they give you so that you can forget about your dreams or so that you can stop dreaming. But I was like, Sheesh, it hit me because so many people you just get comfortable, and I'm not knocking nine of fives at all because I came from one, right? And I respect it. And a lot of my friends, a lot of my clients are still working their nine of fives, and I love that because it makes our society better, it makes our world go round, all of these things. However, when you really want freedom, that's not going to be found under a normal nine of five, right? So we got that out of the way, okay. But when she was like, Yeah, I have to grow, I said yes, because life is about getting uncomfortable. You grow your comfort zone, you're going to grow your wealth zone. And emotional decisions, even recently, right? There were things that I know I needed to do. And I mentioned this to you guys of when the stuff was going down with my dad, and I was just like emotionally eating. And I knew that I needed to not be emotionally eating. I knew that I needed to keep my milk preps. I knew that I needed to go to the gym consistently. I knew that there were some things that I needed to make. There were some things that I know that I needed to do, but I caught myself delaying the things that I knew that I needed to do. Not because I didn't know what to do, not because it required a different level of me. It's that when it actually hit me, it was not necessarily a clarity issue, it was more so a courage and discipline issue. Why? Because it required a different level of me, and that's when it hit me even harder because I was like, oh, so it wasn't, it wasn't because you didn't have the clarity and you didn't know what you needed to do and all of these things. It was because it required a different level of you, and it was a different level of you that desired that deserved courage, and sometimes you have to have courage to say no to things and say no to people because you're struggling to say yes to yourself. Hear me closely, because there's a lot of times that you want to make everybody else happy, and you want to show up for everybody else, but you are not showing up for yourself in the way that you need to, because you're not taking care of your emotional well-being, you're not taking care of what your basic human needs are. And there's times that you must have hard conversations with yourself. You guys know a few weeks ago I spoke to you about my mom's ascension to heaven. Well, that day I felt my emotions that all that week. Um my emotions were just very heavy, and I was just like, why am I starting off the month like this? And I was just like, oh, it's that time of the month. Yes, that time of the month was coming. Okay. However, it was beyond my menstrual cycle, right? It was beyond me PMSing. It was that my body was processing emotions. And usually when I know I have work to do, when I know I have all of these things that I have to show up for, there's times that I'm like, uh, we're gonna put our emotions on a back burner. We're gonna like put them up in these little in this little Pandora box, and we're just gonna put it over there, and we'll tend to that later, right? Because right now it's time to be productive, right now it's time to perform, and you gotta have that on, okay? You gotta be on point 24-7. You don't have time to process your emotions. Like, here is what I've discovered in my X amount of years of doing work. Well, when I don't do that, at the other side of feelings, there's freedom. So, number one, I rob myself of the freedom that I know that I need. Number two, what happens simultaneously is that because I'm depriving myself of the freedom that I need, now I'm holding up all of these emotions inside. Now is like I am just masking the emotions and the feelings in productivity, in performance. And no, everything's fine, but I'm dying inside. And I just I can't do it. And this is why I've learned to also operate in my life. If it's not a hell yes, it's a hell no. It's not a heck yes. Sorry for some people, and I was might be a little too early in the morning for y'all, but it's okay. Um, if it's not a heck yes, it's a heck no. But also, if this is not bringing me joy, I have to ask myself why this is not bringing me joy and how I can make whatever is going on to bring me back joy, but also to have real conversations of is if this filling my cup? Is this allowing me to execute on what it is that I need to execute? And if I am going to show up, am I showing up the best version of me? So I knew that day I needed to do things that just fill my cup. So I did the episode with you guys in the morning. Then I went to go help a friend move because I love serving, and you know, those guys know I love doing that. Then I went to the beach with my brother. We had some food, then I led my business, women's professional group, and it was a great day. And I watched a movie and I had the best day. But what did I learn also was that I needed to give myself permission to feel my feelings. Why? Not only because of the freedom that I was on the other side of that, but the person that I am becoming is worthy of that. Because if you cannot handle certain things at this capacity and at this level, you know, we heard that before, more money, more problems. And the more success that you have, there's going to be more things that you have to deal with. So you have to learn to regulate your emotions early on so that when you're showing up to the places that you're deserving of being, when you are in the positions that you've been working for, when you are when your name is mentioned in the rooms that you weren't even there, you can show up as your highest and best self because you are doing the work, you're doing the work in private. And we hear a lot of times here you get praised in public for the work that you're doing in private. So that is important. Number three, you don't trust yourself yet. You don't trust yourself yet. Confidence doesn't come from hype. Y'all hear me talk about it all the time. It's about God finance, but confidence doesn't come from hype, it comes from kept promises, not only kept promises to other people, but kept promises to yourself. So, what does that look like? If you say you're going to do something and you don't, you train yourself not to believe you. Imagine that. You already are training yourself not to believe other people, but imagine that you keep training yourself not to believe you. That self-trust is built in private, not in public. It's goes back to what I was just talking about earlier. You sitting enough with yourself to say, okay, what do I need? I've read hundreds of books. Which one of these am I going to take now to apply to what it is that I need? Because it's if not, it becomes shelf help, and that's self-help. Right? So what am I going to do different? And you have to have those conversations with yourself in public, in private, I'm sorry, before you're showing up like you need to for everyone else in public. Number four, you don't have structure. You don't have structure. You're relying on motivation. You in instead of systems, and you hear me say all the time, systems stand for saving yourself some time, energy, and money. So, therefore, motivation is inconsistent. And what happens is structure is what carries you when you don't feel like it. Structure is what carries you when you don't feel like it. Growth without systems is just stress. And you don't only see that all over my social media and my website, but that is just truly what I. Believe in. Why? Because a system is what is not only regulated my business and allowed my business to scale, but a system is what I run my life on. And we'll at another time we'll have a conversation of just systems. One of my systems that I love is just a calendar. Everything runs on a calendar for me. But I have structure, I have routine in my morning that is structure. I have to wake up, I have to pray, I have to meditate, I have to read my Bible, I have to journal. Those are the systems that built my foundation. Because if not, it's not gonna be a good day. It's just not right. I have to you master the mundane, magic happens. That has become a magical part of my life because it allows me to put on my armor, it allows me to fill my cup, it allows me to ease into my morning, right? But it allows me to fill my cup in ways that nobody else can. This is just my alone time. The structure, what structure do you have to organize your day? I also have my top three power plays for the day. These are three things that must get done, right? The top three priorities, top three power plays, whatever you want to call it, but the top three things that must get done every single day. What does that look like for you? There has to be some type of structure in your day. My business owners, I was just talking to this client about it. I'm like, it's not so much of you need a CRM, you have to have a structure in your business that is going to allow everything that you're doing to be simplified. You want to not only have people that you do a transaction with, but you want to build relationships. It's about you building relationships with your people. When you talk about, when you hear about word of mouth advertising, when you hear about your name spoken in rooms that you're not you're you're not in just yet, why is that? Because branding is who you are and marketing is how you tell that story, but what are people talking about you when you're not in the room, right? So that's how you know that you're showing up like you need to, because that branding matters, that system matters. So not only when people leave you, they have a great experience. Well, let them go tell their worlds, let them get a little text message that says, Hey, can you write a Google review for me? There's just little things that will keep you in the forefront of people's people's minds. And when you think about just simplifying your systems, if you are a business owner and you have a missed call, that is missed money. You are leaking revenue, and you're putting in hours, you're putting in time, you're putting in marketing, you're putting all of these things into your business, but you are leaking revenues, and there's so many revenue gaps and so many revenue leaks that people don't even realize in their business. I don't care how small or how big your business is, you need to do something that allows you to see where are the gaps, allows you to see where am I leaking revenue? What things can I tighten? I talk about this all the time. Whether you want to do a consult conversation with me or strategy call or just do a SWOT analysis with your team and see, okay, where are some of my strengths? Where are some of my weaknesses? Where are some of my opportunities? Where are some of my threats? And let everybody, oh, good friend of mine gave me an idea the other day. She said, you know, I let people do the SWAT by themselves and then we compare instead of doing it as a team because I want them to be open and don't even put your name on it. We just switch. And I love that because it is necessary to have those conversations. I'm gonna tell y'all, the moment I started adding structure into my life and to my business, everything changed. My calendar got tighter, my priorities got clearer, my execution got stronger. Because now I wasn't asking myself, oh, do I feel like doing that? I was moving based on what I was committed to do. Last but certainly not least, you're in the wrong environment. You're trying to elevate, however, you're in rooms that don't require more from you. So what happens now? Your standards are lowered. There's no accountability because for what? And there's also no pressure for you to grow. Your environment will either stretch you or keep you stuck. I love being able to be in environments where I'm being challenged. As much as you're like, oh my goodness, the people you see me around, they challenge me. They they stretch my thinking, they stretch my not only my cognitive thinking on things, but also making me think outside of the box, making me think outside of my beliefs, challenge me. Why do you think the way that you think? Right? If you are not being stretched, if the people around you are not not only encouraging you and empowering you, educating you, stretching you, you are in the wrong room. So again, I ask you, what did you say you were going to do that you still haven't done? What did you say you were going to do that you still haven't done? I don't think you need another plan, if I'm being honest with y'all. I don't think you need to listen to another podcast episode unless you're tuning into Ug Light. I think you don't need more information. You need to become someone who follows through. Because the truth is your life will change the moment your word starts meaning something to you. It has to mean something to you. If your word only means something to the people that love you, trust, and believe you, but it doesn't mean anything to you, we gotta make some changes because this is not just for other people, but this is to you. Your word needs to mean something for you. And if you're tired of starting and stopping, if you're tired of knowing what to do, but not doing it or starting, but not executing, book a strategy call. DM me the word execute, comment on here. I will send you my calendar link. Get in the room that requires more from you because this room will inspire you, will hold you accountable, and that proximity is powerful beyond accountability for execution, for impact, and for legacy. And as always, breakfast has been served. Much love to you guys. I will see you guys next week here live. And remember, keep the promises you make to yourself and watch your life change. Bye, guys.